I think Keine has the best hat. It's still darn silly though.

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It seems like many people on here are very much interested in bees and beekeeping (very much so). Why is this a thing?
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They pollinate plants, build neat structures, and make honey. What's not to like?
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>>16491
Nice. I give it a 🅱️/🅱️.

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__kijin_seija_touhou_drawn_by_torinari_dtvisu__sam
(I'll start, here's an oneshot.)

Impossible Spellcard: The Musical.

Does anybody ever wonder if I have my reasons?
I’m not as weird as they say.
It’s funny how the world can change so much throughout the seasons.
And here I pretty much..staaaay the same!
Some might say that life is an Impossible Spellcard.
Trouble knocking at your door.
I can’t take it anymore!
Wo-aoh!

It is my tragic duty….
To flip around society!
You wouldn’t understand!
It’s not a phaaaaseeee, mom!

The Cheat Items are my chance to be cool! (her chance to be cool!)
And I’ll finally fit in ; I’ll be the hip gal in school! (Hip gal in school!)
They won’t make fun of my weird horns.
And they’ll say, “Seija, you rule..sooo hard!”
(So hard!)
So haaaaaaaaard!
(So hard!)

The Miracle Mallet* will help me beat every girl!
And Sukuna will be so jealous.
She’ll bend over and hurl!
And then I’ll go pee on Yukari.
The Gold Rush of victory!
(Woohooo!)

Oh yeah!
(Wait, that’s weird)
No it’s not!
(Yes, it iiiiis!)
It’s…
It's a dominance thing!
(no response)
Cats do it!
(Music stops)
Come on, you guys!
We were just getting to the good part too!
Gawd!
The end.


Note: Miracle Mallet is the fake version.

That's all folks, I was reminded of a fun 2hu post (Donut Graze was the name iirc) so I wanted to make a spot for that here too, put in a song made by you or ripped off or whatever.

It's fun either way.
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What is blue?
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gee I wonder
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I am a blind fish then, sorry for posting at the wrong spot.

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>>/blue/23156 brought up a pretty good idea, so let's give it a go and see how it works out.

This is the thread for all writers who want critique (despite the title, yes, real critique) hurled their way based off of their posted work. Put your name on, link your story, and wait for anon to roast. Easy peasy.

And since it'd be kind of silly to start off a thread without, y'know, contributing to its premise, I'll go ahead and offer my own work up for roasting. Sure, it's dead, but go ahead and roast away anyway: >>/youkai/28957
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>>16446
Alright I looked at that forest story. The main criticism I can give is that the story is very meandering. When I was reading it, I got the feeling that things just sort of happen to Rumia instead of there being a central driving plot guiding Rumia. There used to be a central driving plot at the beginning, where a mysterious disembodied voice gave Rumia a mission to kill all the Anons and promised to guide Rumia on her adventure, but the voice just sort of vanished without explanation after Rumia killed the weird Alice goo monster and fell unconcious.

That's the other main criticism I have with this story. Characters and plot points have a nasty tendency to just sort of disappear from the story without warning. Take Wriggle for example. Wriggle ended up being killed by the Alice goo monster entirely offscreen, with no way for us to influence Wriggles fate. According to the Alice goo monster, it was entirely our fault that Wriggle died, even though the last thing we voted for prior to Wriggle's death was "lets try really hard to beat Wriggle to Marisa's house." Having the result of "lets race Wriggle" be "Wriggle is dead and its all your fault" seems like a rather extreme and unfairly unforeseeable consequence of our actions.

And Wriggle was one of the lucky ones, she actually got an explanation for her disappearance. Some characters don't even get that much. Like the Black Knight Anon that attacked us in Rinnosuke's shop. Rumia gets into a big fight with the knight, covers the area in darkness, and then the knight just sort of disappears. What happened to him, where did he go, what is he doing now? Who knows. He basically just fell out of the story with no explanation. A similar thing happened with the fairies Rumia met in the forest. Rumia attracts a horde of hundreds of fairies and runs to Reimu's shrine to escape them. Rumia spends maybe 10 minutes in the shrine and leaves with Shion through a window, and suddenly the fairies are gone, despite there being hundreds of fairies outside surrounding the shr
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>>16448

I've read your criticism and firstly want to thank you for giving them. I'm sure it took some time to write all that and all of those are really good points that you're making.

Now I'm going to explain stuff as much as I can without making any sort of excuses for myself.

>Wriggle death.

That was going to happen anyway, you are absolutely not responsible for that outcome. It's simply something the thing said to make you feel even worse at what it thought was going to be your last moments for that extra juicy tears. The thing was blatantly a sadist and deserved to die. (And would be a nice thing to suddenly remember if you ever you yourself making someone suffer for the same reasons only to end up disgusted by how similar to it you're acting since I don't have the guts to make Rumia into a total monster regardless of how much she hypes herself up to be one).

Wriggle's revival is meant to be a main motivator to keep moving even if you decided to simply not listen to some voice in your head that told you to eat some yummy outsiders. There were multiple ways to achieve it and you're already found one of them so I have to praise you for that.

Heck, once that's achieved.

>Black Knight

Short words: He ran away, seeing how he was already wounded and saw you just cover yourself in darkness and sit on the ground it'd assume you had some counter attack in mind and decided to simply not risk it and run away. You could have pursued him by tracking him or choosing to lose your patience during the darkness waiting game. As for what's it doing now?

It's and its crew got found by Marisa and total party killed once they tried to ambush her. Had you been with her then you could have prevented her kleptomania from getting the better on her and not put on some obviously sus tiara. The rest is history.

>Fairies

For that one I simply wimped out, sure the Hakurei went ahead to go and e
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You know what, I'll throw my story into the ring here. In particular, I'd like to know if there's anything in particular that works/doesn't work about my writing style, or any high/lowlights of note in the updates. A lot of what I've been doing has been making things up as I'm going along, so any feedback would be useful.

Urban Student in Limbo: https://www.thp.moe/th/res/202201.html

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A thread to trip, scatter, and fumble all over Touhou-related source myths and scholarly materials. Feel free to contribute anything of interest, even if the connection might not be obvious at first!
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https://archive.org/details/transactionsasi22japagoog/page/n222/mode/2up

First up, we have a paper on those mysterious mountain-dwelling folk, "The Tengu". It's got more than you ever wanted to know about our nosey pom-pom-wearing neighbours—what kinds of tengu there are, their origins, their eating and possibly even mating habits, and selected myths from every era—courtesy of one Dr. M. W. de Visser from the Asiatic Society of Japan.

Goes from pp. 222–298 in the link.
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>>16403
A quick look at that tells me that the tengu are very much a catch-all sort of supernatural creature in Japanese tradition. There's barbarity and oni-like behavior, possessions (and trying to seduce priests while in the bodies of women), transformations, behavior like angry spirits/are ghosts of the dead, tree demons, and a lot of links to Buddhism. They could just as soon be bros and teach humans swordmanship or something else or try to destroy them. There seem to be several mentions of pearls/stones in relation to (greater) tengu. All in all interesting stuff. Even if the source takes that sometime patronizing tone common in Victorian/Edwardian analysis of other cultures.
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Of course no such thread could be complete without the oldest record of Japan's myths and legends and indeed the oldest extant written work from Japan, the Kojiki or "Records of Ancient Matters". Being written as they have been in a combination of Old Japanese and contemporaneous Classical Chinese, it is rather awkward in translation—B. H. Chamberlain our English translator going as far as to call them "queer and bald in Japanese ... and it is therefore right, even from a stylistic point of view, that they should sound bald and queer in English"—but still the stories contained within are quite vivid and a careful reader will encounter many familiar names and figures, not least of which include Hieda no Are its original composer and Motoori Norinaga its most prominent latter-day decipherer. One will learn of the cleverer and not-so-clever machinations of Yagokoro Omoikane and Ame no Sagume, the true species of the sisters Toyotamahime and Tamayorihime, and even the rather inauspicious birth of Haniyasubime. Most of all will one learn of the life and times of Ōkuninushi, youngest among eighty brothers and good friend of the White Hare of Inaba, whose story is so often forgotten in popular dissemination in favour of those of Izanagi and Izanami and of Amaterasu and Susanoo—and whose dealings with the heavenly gods of Takamagahara still cast a Moon-shaped shadow over certain parts of Gensokyo to this day.

Only, it is advised that one do indeed consult the footnotes (of which there are regrettably many, coming out to probably thicker than the text itself), and note down what Japanese name corresponds with what English rendering, unless one enjoy reading about the exploits of His-Swift-Impetuous-Male-Augustness in the palace of the Heaven-Shining-Great-August-Deity.

Also, all of the naughty bits are rendered in Latin, because this translation was done nearly a century and a half ago. But, trust me, you're really not missing out on much.

Without further ado:
https://www.sacred-texts.com/shi/kj/index.htm

(Alternative source, in the interest of maximal longevity:
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Serious discussion time:
Who out of all the main series protagonists is the most lethal? If Reimu, Marisa, Sakuya, Youmu, and Sanae were to stop playing danmaku and just try to kill eachother, who would be consistently doing better or worse?

This isnt just a "who is best" argument either, as the above sentence should imply, even if an objective winner is found that just means its time to argue second and third place.
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Cirno unironically (and ironically, due to her being the weaker boss in the same game) has the best matchup against Sakuya due to her perfect freeze, which creates an area of (almost?) 0k temperature, which also stops any low energy and any physical projectile in their track immediately.

Assuming Sakuya accelerates her time (rather than stopping everyone else's) it would mean her entering the area of effect of perfect freeze at any point would freeze her solid to the core in what amounts to an instant, which qualifies as an incapacitation, granting Cirno victory.
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>>16399
Except Cirno is just the kind of dumbass who would forget that she can even do that. Plus she really has no skin in the game when fairies don't permadeath. She might win by "default" because of it, but that means basically nothing when she probably wouldn't remember what was happening after getting murked yet again. But hollow victories do feel pretty Touhou so I dunno.
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>>16400
> Intelligence
Cirno is dumb when it comes to booksmarts but she has shown competency in battle. While Marisa started out playing around with her she has admitted at the end of their battle in Great Fairy Wars that she had to put in real effort towards the end. Mind you what I am saying here is from memory and may differ from what I said in actuality.
Whether she's gonna be strategic enough to pull what I said through is up for debate - maybe there are manga panels showing her being creative with her ice powers, which could set a reasonable precedent for it.

>Win condition
There's reason to assume most folks have ways to incapacitate Cirno; sealing, capturing her tying her up. Reimu wins here by default again. Reisen's insanity works as well.

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Making me post up another thing, god damn...

A few people wanted to do 30 updates a month. More people just wanted "any kind of story fitting the theme, short or otherwise". I don't care how you go about it, but for September of this year how about writing a "horror" themed story?

Wuzzat mean? Well after having talked about it a lot I and others have concluded that actual horror might not be in most THP writers' wheelhouses, so fast and loose is the idea. Ghost characters (Tojiko, Minamitsu, Mima, Yuyuko, (sorta) Youmu), spookier characters (fortune teller, Rumia, Kisume, Yuuka)---that's fair game with whatever scenario. Bonus for trying to make things creepy with any character, OC or not, that you choose? There's no prizes here, and no winners. Well, we all win with some participation.

If you do a comedy, that's fine. Slice of life, that's fine. "Scary" story, also fine. Porn? Fine.

I want you to write. A short, a full story, whatever you like.

Let's fill the site with life a little by dabbling in some themes of death, and have a chilling or chill September.

Post here or the other thread idgaf I'll be linking my story here when I'm ready to post it because the other thread is pushing a rule I don't agree with.
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I'm chipping in for this, too
>>/shorts/2395
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There we go.
>>/shorts/2400
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I'm glad we had a decent amount of activity! Sorry that I... still haven't updated my story. It WILL happen, I was insanely busy with something else. As in I spent about 30 hours or so on writing related things unrelated to Touhou, out of obligations, and I seriously had no time for much of anything else. Yay!

I'LL FUGGIN GET TO IT! GOOD WORK, EVERYONE ELSE

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Spoooktember
You hear your phone ring, an unknown number is on it

Out of curiosity you pick it up, what could possibly go wrong?



Boo!

Did that scare you Anon? If not then you poor soul have yet to realize something very important~

You've been hit by the curse of WRITE OR DIE dun~ dun~ DUN!

The only way to survive this terrible force is to participate in the most unholy ritual known as Spooktember, perhaps you've never heard of it since it's only now that we shall partake in it in the Outside World.

Spooktember is an event that we youkai or people without souls participate in every 300 years or so, by spreading scary stories, stories about ghost girls, or overall stories that fit the theme of the supernatural we make the world a tad more aware of it. It's an modest and honest way to combat the evil and oh so sceptic Science people that give you your funny sound boxes and metal cars.

But enough lore, now it's time to know the conditions with which you may regain your freedom.

-Post an story, as long as it fits the theme (It's a pretty broad one) it works just fine.

-Make 30 updates in around 30 days (Ergo 1 update per day), if I see you do 30 updates in the span of one day then I'll personally crawl out of your tv and strangle you...unless you're into that and then it'll just be an heart attack since those are popular in ghost stories no? it'd be an good way to die at least.

-Either put the tag Contest entry on your story, or just a send link of it here so we can count you as an participant.


Those are the 3 golden rules of Spooktember, however we are aware that you have mortal lives and stuf so if you fail to update once then it's okay! Just update twice the next day or three times the day after that! as long as 30 updates have been done within the done then consider yourself free to die of old age or other measures.

Now of course don't be surprised if other people have the curse as well, honestly it's their own faul
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then who was phone!?
Good luck if you're participating
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The effort in this post is appreciated, but you can look at the discussion thread yourself to see that the 30 updates thing was not agreed upon and was rather one poster's assumption that a few others agreed to >>16310 . Others disagreed, as honestly shorts were expected instead. We actually do have a 30 updates in a month thing, but it's in November since that's National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo)

I'm not going to prompt anyone to try to do 30 updates in a month. If they try that's their prerogative, but it's definitely not what everyone agreed on while we were coming up with this
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Ah, that's my bad then!

Do ignore this one from now on, and I'll gladly participate in the correct Spooktember!

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*does not actually have to be in/from gensokyo, just touhou project.

I think Keine's hat is in fact, NOT the best hat, regardless of aesthetics. its shape means its liable to fall off her head at any given moment, and its small brim means it keeps neither the rain nor sun off her head, meaning it is not only stupid, but useless.

Therefore, I want us to debate which hat, is the single best, or at the very least, least shit, in touhou project. style can be a factor, but at the end of the day, a hat that cant do its job is still useless.

To start I'm going to say Marisa's hat is at least a massive improvement over Keine's at the very least it'll keep her head dry-ish.
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>>16293
WaggySaggy has no hat, silly.
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I don't see an hat anywhere anons, Show your argument by showing a better one
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>>16286
...cant really argue with this, if I made another argument it was gonna be tenshi or iku, but this has em beat. My vote is for the dumpster hags hat.

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nanofall2020
Alright, fuckboys, since you're all you, I guess it's time to get this shit started a month early. And since I'm the one to get around to it this time, we're just cramming the threads together. Don't like it? Well, we can talk about it later over tea.

Okay, so, what's Nanowrimo?

I'm glad you asked, figurative anon who's been living under a fucking rock!

NaNoWriMo (or National Novel Writing Month) is a goddamn month to write a goddamn novel. In THP's case, that means thirty uninterrupted days of updates or thirty-thousand (30,000) words total. If you can manage it, good for you. Pat yourself on the back.

How about prizes for those who finish under the conditions?

No.

If somebody wants to do it, they can. I'm not going to hold out hope, nor do I think anyone else is. Why not give us all a pleasant surprise?

Okay, fine. Oh, and what's this crap about A.T.O.M.?

I could natter on about the history of it, but here's the TL;DR:

MAKE FUCKING ACTIVITY.

That's it. Just update, vote, discuss, shitpost, and do whatever the fuck you want to as long as you're injecting a little life into this site. There are no rules or conditions because it's not really a contest.

And there's the usual bonus objective of bumping this thread at least once per day (read: you can do it again even if someone else has).

Is there any prize for that?

The satisfaction that you've been something close to a contributing member of the community for once in your goddamned life.

Good enough for me. When does all of this shit start and end?

Start: 01 November, midnight in whatever shitty timezone you live in.

End: 01 December, midnight in whatever shitty timezone you live in.

So, yeah, if the new plague hasn't got you by then, get ready to fucking start, assholes.

P.S.
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Day thirty. Last day, lads!
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>>16211
Finished with thirty updates. I'm a dumb bitch, but I did it. See you guys next decade.
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otsukareokuu
Well, guess that's a wrap, fellow atomics.

See you come... March? May? Sometime in the coming year. We can all have a radioactive good time then, too.

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gang signs
YOU

ME

A BOTTLE OF WINE NANOWRIMO

So Nanowrimo’s approaching in two weeks. Know what that means? Yeah, you guessed it. A bunch of broken promises. Starting November, I’m pushing all you writers out there to do thirty updates in November. No, I’m not telling you that you HAVE to do one a day because I know shit happens. Your internet died for a day? Write two updates the next day. No big deal.

If you decide to write thirty updates in one day, I’m going to find out where you live and personally drown you in a kiddie pool.

Anyway. Rules are simple. Thirty updates before November ends—and no, I’m not going to give a fuck about timezones. inb4 muh 12 hour extension. They can be shorts, updates for a current story, updates for a new story—all are fine. But if you’re going to do multiple stories, remember to link them here. It’s going to be hell for record-keeping if you don’t.

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE.

“You mean there’s more to Nanowrimo than thirty days of suffering?”

You bet your ass you’re right, conveniently-timed-question-man. If you manage to do all thirty updates, YOU can provide a story idea, a concept, a rough outline, or your shitty fetishes, and a group of volunteer writers will pick it up and write about it.

Who’s in the group of volunteer writers, you ask?

Well, uh.

Just me so far. But here’s where I’m pleading begging asking you to help. If you want to try your hand at this, just post in the thread that you’re willing to volunteer.

If you have any questions, just hop on over to the IRC or Discord and ask. Or use this thread, I don't care. I'm not your mom. Do whatever you want.
IRC: https://www.touhou-project.com/?page=irc
Discord: https://discord.gg/UPHZMWy
This thread: >>15589 (really?)
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>>15685
hmm yes, yes, I could do this.

perhaps something to write while I am secluded from the world.
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>>15822
Please, feel free. If we end up with 2 on accident, that won't be a bad thing.
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>>15691
>>/shorts/2302
I finally did it. It only took like two years hahahahaha fuck me. If you squint real hard, you might be able to see romance but don't strain your eyes. Funny how I prefer to write romance when possible, but I took a big fucking detour when asked to write one.

Anyway, I might continue on and write the other stories in this thread but give me like another decade.

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