It’s that time. What time? Time to Village Life: It’s Never Safe at Work, a 2023 Lewd Shorts Writing Competition!

The terms are none too complicated:
- Starting March 24th till March 31st, writers will submit their entries in a thread provided at that date.
- A twist! Writers can choose one of two themes or both at once.
- The readers, in addition to voting, will decide whether or not their chosen entry satisfies both the themes.
- Such entries as do will receive an extra point in the final tally.
- Voting will be held for a week, starting on the 1st of April.

Without any more ado, the themes shall be these:

Theme 1: - Not Safe For Work –
In other words: workplace shenanigans, professional unprofessionalism, getting it on before getting off work! This can of course stand for good, old-fashioned exchange of pleasure for tangibles – but also characters in a superior/subordinate relationship straining the boundaries of said relationship, regular business swerving into ribaldry, bodily bargaining, etc. An exorcism gone wrong very right with one of Gensokyo’s premier youkai exterminators. Sakuya evaluating a candidate for the mistress’s hand in marriage – down to every last inch of him. A callow Wolf Tengu finding himself inveigled in a scandal while investigating a social uproar among the Crows. An acolyte attending their goddess in all her unreasonable, attention-starved whimsies. All fair game.

And, since I hear you clamouring:
>Is the Lotus Pavilion a professional establishment too?!
Yes. So the house rules avow. Tell you what; I’ll even add an extra point to your final score if you touch upon that THP sextaple.

Theme 2: - Village Girls –
Meaning the usual suspects who live, regularly visit or ply their trade (wink, wink) in the Human Village. Your story must, furthermore, take place within the Village. This is your chance to flaunt your knowledge of the town’s comings-and-goings. An illicit, midnight poker game at the Geidontei with its less savoury frequenters, perhaps? The history teacher’s clandestine rendezvous with a once-student, now all grown up? The village bicycle being taken out on a rough track? Once again, fair game every one.
>Fie! But what if I should an out-of-town character to the village visit desire?
Calm down, Futo. First of all, a number of more and less expected characters do haunt the Human Village. However, if you are even so hankering after that double-theme-dip and a character who has no business being there, by all means! Give them that business. Make it play into your short’s setup – et voila. Nobody’ll be able to tell you your favourite’s too antisocial to get lucky on a night out in town!
>Huzzah!
Indeed.

If there are any remaining questions, go ahead, ask them. Otherwise, you are the challengers. I await your first strokes.