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This is non-canon. If you take this as canon, I likely will look at you oddly.

Alrighty, now, with the advent of hopefully joking /at/ requests, looks like, while I wait for votes, I'll be doing little ditties here in an effort to not make people think I'm unfairly forcing their hand. You guys are either going to hate this or love it.

I'm not sure which I'd prefer, though, but we'll soon find out!

Expect gore, vore and maybe even death by bore! Or other things, too, such as monster girls and the like, which are common in my story. Honestly not sure how all these things will go, but we'll see.

I mean by way of drill, not boredom, by the way. Although, I'm sure someone out there has a bore dom fetish, but we'll hopefully not be dealing with drill dominatrices, so I won't be becoming their go-to author.

Right, puns and word plays, too.

Depending on reception to my horrifying/silly sex scenes, this may be a project that keeps going and going, like the lovely chocolate bunny of a protagonist we have.

I hope you guys reject me like a back alley organ transfer, but we'll see.
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Thank you~ I do try to be creative in my horribleness.

Honestly, I was mostly writing this to poke fun at the people begging for /at/.


Well, unless Renko snuffs Youki, Wriggle the Catfish, a bakebake, a random bird or an annoying dog or something, I don't see that happening. And, honestly, that would be odd, as she's not particular to men.

These are Bad Ends, after all. They're not likely to be happy things.

There's only one potentially /at/ worthy scene I have planned that isn't, though it's also possible to woo others if one figures it out, but still.

Time I get back to this for today, it seems! I'd tell you to enjoy, but I'm more making this to sharpen my teeth. ...With porn, apparently. I guess it fits well enough.

Porn's usually full of hard things.

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You feel more fragile.


You huff and puff as you feel the blood in your fingers and toes rapidly slow and freeze. It’s neither painful nor cold. It doesn’t feel very good, mind you, but it’s that sort of ohh-god-why-are-my-fingers-getting-frostbite kind, not the ohh-oww-god-oww-why-oww-are-oww-my-oww-fingers-oww-getting-oww-frostbite kind.

You lay there, your breathing gradually feeling less like you ran a mile after flirting with people all night, watching frosty clouds form in front of you. It’s like you’re breathing hot air in the winter, but in reverse, and the worst part is, the warm air around you isn’t all that comfortable.

It’s as if you’re in an oven, and you feel… You feel…

You are not going to die. Not to a little hot air. Not here. Not now. Not ever. Never!

Your determination not to die freezes the air around you.

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White Day special number two of two. Deadlines are deadlines.


I, Mononobe no Futo, am currently quite troubled at present.

I twirl this chocolate delicacy between my fingers. A compact sweet shaped like a heart. I had not the courage to make one myself, but am even more troubled by simply holding it. Am I not a fool? This impulse is much too brash for someone of my stature….


I jump, shoving the chocolate into my sleeves before I turn around.

“Crown Prince!”

The Crown Prince stands before me, nodding to me in greeting. Though, I would not prefer for her to catch me in the hallway.
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Get Tojika realize that she's still loved so threesome!
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It’s out of nowhere. But I can only do what I can. So here’s something.

It also doesn’t follow any write-in. This is a standalone standalone. Standing alone.


It is Mononobe no Futo. I sit with the Crown Prince as she cultivates her mind. Her eyes rest closed as though asleep, our arms touching by the clothes. I thought to also cultivate with her, but that was impossible to do.

”It is alright. You may simply sit next to me if you wish.”

The Crown Prince considers my situation, knowing well the chocolate I have for her today. It pains me to know that she knows without wanting to know.

How can I say it? A woman has her thoughts, yet the Crown Prince cannot help her own nature. I know she knows I wish to give her the chocolate. I know she knows I wish to seriously cultivate with her. And she also knows I know that she knows I cannot do so with my feelings toward her. But she shows consideration for my desires by not speaking of them. But she also knows that I know she knows about that.

A true conundrum in the matters of love.
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Hoping you’ll continue this soon!

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Previous thread >>34054

Hmm, maybe a trip to Old Hell. You haven't been down there in a while, so it might be good to greet Satori, or something. Might be a good chance of weather as well: it's stupidly hot down there, but at least it's a lot less humid.

Going down there might be dangerous, though. Your reputation is more or less non-existent below the surface, so youkai might not have the basic sense to run away from you. That, and there's a bunch of oni down there. It's probably a good thing you don't have a reputation as a strong fighter for them: they'd probably take it as an invitation to line up and fight you non-stop.

Well, you're in no hurry, so proper preparations won't hurt anything. You walk to your room, grab a stack of papers, and start writing. It's not difficult to turn them into ofuda like this, but there's a huge number of them, so the process eats up a few hours. Once that's taken care of, you grab about a hundred needles from the jar and place them into your pouch.

It's still morning, but you might as well wait until after lunch before leaving. The shrine always needs to be cleaned, so now would be a good time to take care of that. You grab a broom and step outside, wanting to get the sweeping done while it's still cool out. The fairies kept the grounds pretty clean, so there isn't too much to do.

You stop by the lake and peer in. Your babies aren't in it; they must have taken Yukari's gap to go to the Misty Lake. Which is perfectly understandable, but it occurs to you that you don't really have any way to call for them. Short of just jumping into the water and swimming to the lake yourself, but you don't really want to do that.

Time passes quickly as you clean the floors in the shrine. You fly towards youkai mountain after eating a big lunch. You'll probably need the sustenance for your hike, even if it's down instead of up. The flight is uneventful, and you set down in front of the chasm leading to the underworld. You step in and begin
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You, Dionysus (Bacchus), Are:
~Cordially Invited~ As a Guest of Honor
To Gensokyo’s First Fantastical Bachelorette Bash on the Palanquin
For One Week of Entertainment and Merrymaking


You saunter out of the suite’s shower with a contented sigh. You were quick enough so that the mirror over the sink has only just begun to mist over, so you take the time to throw several seductive poses at yourself, flexing your biceps and crunching your abs while shining some pearly white teeth. Should you be blonde, brunette, or something else entirely today, you wonder? You decide to go with the first option, tossing back a head of wavy golden locks. Being a god has its benefits, but while some old codgers up in the ol’ pantheon simply will themselves into eternal purity, it’s kind of your thing to find new lows of debauchery to descend into. That, and you’ve gotten addicted to the sensation of honest hot water rinsing off all those caked and crusting fluids after a night’s revelry. It almost feels as good as the sex itself.

… okay, okay, you’re a terrible liar. The sex is definitely the better half of the routine.

It’s just that at the current moment, the only would-be candidate for that activity within reach is all tuckered out, curled into a ball underneath the king-sized bed’s sheets with her hands still loosely clasped over her aching cunt in her slumber. You, uh, kinda sorta went overboard on her last night. Not by your standards, true, but certainly by hers. She’d boasted that as a “youkai” she’d be able to handle anything you’d put her through. However, she proved to be no maenad, her eyes rolled into the back of her head before you’d even finished getting yourself off properly, and it’d only been her third climax, for crying out loud!

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[X] Strike while the iron’s hot. Gently help her along now that she’s already halfway there, then let her dreams transition to reality before she can realize it. The food’s in heated trays, so you two can enjoy a post-coital meal while you bask in the afterglow.
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> Find a new story to read.
> Check dates
> It's been over a month.

I believe in you.

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this won't be everyone's cup of tea oh god don't kill me please


I never met a bitch who had it coming more than the mouse.

She was the most arrogant, puffed-up bitch I've ever seen, and around here that's saying something. She went down in less than four minutes, too, which really pissed me off; despite all that shit-talking she really couldn't duel worth a damn. What pushed me over the edge was how she kept fucking sassing despite being knocked on her ass and out of magic. I kicked her onto her back and ripped her dress open from collar to waist without really thinking about it. We stared at each other for a second, catching up to events - her eyes went wider than dinner plates when she felt the breeze on her belly. I was in no mood for bullshit at that point so before she'd finished her first scream I slapped it right out of her. If you put some pepper into it a good slap will knock them senseless for a few seconds without doing any real harm. Three or four good smacks later and she was too stunned to struggle. Ripped the rest of her dress open and did a double take: tiny little thing, weighed maybe ninety pounds soaking wet and stood barely five feet tall, but she had an ass. Wide hips, firm, round little rear end, firm, shapely thighs, even slender, curvy calves. I cupped her pussy in my hand without touching her thighs, it was that good. I put her ankles on my shoulders and slid her panties (blue-white stripes, no less) to her calves and slipped 'em over one foot. She came around when I laid my cock against her groin - that's usually when they start begging for better terms, but she just stared at me with her cherry-red eyes, whispering “no, no, no” in this baffled tone, like she was completely confused at how this was happening at all.

I took my stance; knees spread wide for low, stab
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>I'll be getting back to this shortly.
So much for 'Regulary Scheduled Ryona'.
So no chance to see this resumed?

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Timeline-wise, this is a sequel to “Master, Master”.


I turn the page. For a while, Remi's been jabbering on about what she's heard about today. She's repeated it twice in case I wasn't listening. Which I was. I'm not listening more than I am waiting, though. Yes.

I'm waiting for her to turn in for the night.

“...That's why I was wondering if there was going to be something happening later today,” Remi taps her elbow against the table while waving her palm up, “but nothing ever did.”

With one ear, I process what my friend has said. I stare over my book. “And you heard this from...?”

“Sakuya, of course.”

Hm. The likely cause of her presence here. Most certainly to entertain Remi.
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Where is the first one?

In the "Lewd One-Shots Thread" on this board. Sorry for the confusion.

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Forgive the title, I’m still trying to figure out how to make dumb authentic-y sounding titles to things. So this is the thread I made for shorter stories, CYOA or just regular stories we’re inspired to make with the theme of one or more of the characters being genderswapped. Since this is Touhou, that basically means becoming male.

I’ll happily take feedback, suggestions, etc, and put up the ideas and brainstorming I’ve already seen, briefly, here. In addition, anyone is welcome to contribute to this thread if an idea strikes your fancy or something.

In the meantime…
-Male!Momiji + Aya. One day, the teasing or something goes too far and she has a big bad wolf on her hands? Or a shota wolf tengu, whatever works.
-Male!Momiji and Male!Aya + Hatate. The news-getting trio, with a cute enthusiastic girl and two big tall strong boys. Sandwiches probably ensue.
-Male!Reimu and Sanae. Rivalry between religious figures, tension and then a final resolution?

-Male!Youmu and Yuyuko. Pretty straightforward; cute gardener boy with a harsh exterior but an innocent streak plus curvy glutton free spirit mistress.
-Male!Eiki and Komachi . An attempt to discipline a subordinate and her killer body. Does he
conquer her or end up conquered himself?

-Male!Nazrin goes through the UFO crew including of course plenty of time buried in Byakuren as well as various other sorts of relationships with all the others.
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I'll not lambast you for bumping an old thread, but it would have been a much better idea to just create a writefag request thread
Probably. But still this thread is still open for requests, at least that's what Rule claims on IRC.
Well color me retarded then, I retract my statement.

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1.1 The Horned Matchmaker

Mokou Fujiwara would like to say that with more than a millennia worth of life experience, she's possessed an amount of wisdom that would see her through any challenge the world could throw at her. But if she does, she knows that she would be lying.

The fact is, not a single second of experience in her life could tell her what would be the best course of action in regard of her current predicament. Though, it's not like she spent her days actively looking for life lessons. She already regretted the fact that she spent most of the current millennium being an anti social shut-in, living alone with minimum contact with anyone or anything, be it human or else. After all, what is the point of putting the effort to build relationship with anyone if you're only going to outlive them? The first few centuries of her immortality already taught her the pain of losing is simply not worth the effort.

But still, a little bit of social skill wouldn't hurt in a situation like this. Then again, she doubt that even if she spent her immortality being the most social thing in the entire world, that she would be able to be less of a gibbering mess than she is now.


The only other soul in that room gives out a small sound, demanding her attention. It appears that Mokou has been silent far longer than she had thought. Trying to regain her focus, Mokou focused her sight to the environment that's now surrounding her.
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Nice ! I'll be looking forward to this story.
This needs to keep on going!

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What am I doing. Yes, period.


A king of spades. An eight of spades. Yuyuko has a nine of spades face-up. The other is face down covering the nine halfway.

"Yukari? Draw or stay?"

The mental cogs in your mind turn. This is a tricky one. There are fifteen out of forty nine cards left that could be a ten. Disregarding any calculation error, that means there's about a thirty percent chance of losing when staying. However, assuming Yuyuko has another nine, then there are thirty six bad cards that will cause a defeat. A seventy five percent chance of a loss if one chooses to draw. Reversing that, it means Yuyuko has a twenty five percent chance of winning when drawing. Yuyuko's favorable outcomes are nearly identical. So why not take a gamble?

"I suppose I'll draw a card."

"Really?" Yuyuko brings a hand to her mouth. "That's not like you."

"I wonder? The stakes are high for the game we've chosen."
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[x] Invite (Force) Youmu to play together.
[X] Pardon her. But, she needs to do something for the rest of the day.
[X] Pardon her. But, she needs to do something for the rest of the day.

Calling. Writing. Nyagh. Unless things happen or have happened.

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