Original Thread One: >>>/at/16360

Everything started from a little drunken walk in the woods. Though you might have been running. And you might have been chasing someone. Your recollection has never been super-clear. At the very least, you had stumbled off the beaten path and ended up in something of a muddy patch.

That’s where you first met Tenta, your current closest frenemy. Coming to and seeing him attached to your chest, much less seeing tentacles come out of you, was a shock, to say the least. Once you’d gotten used to his presence and had the chance to talk to him, you figured that you might as well roll with it until you can do something about it. Besides, a bit of playing around in the forest showed you that having tentacles could be fun and even useful.

Fast forwarding through the next couple of days, you had a pretty whirlwind tour of the way being literally attached to Tenta can complicate your life: You found out that he has a daughter, a nue named, oddly, Nue, who seems to have no problem getting really close with her dad. You also found out that he was somehow ‘acquainted’ in the past with none other than Yakumo Yukari. Even worse, you discovered that he had some sort of encounter with a previous Hakurei shamaness and ended up sealed away for it. Whatever his crimes, Yukari seemed overjoyed to see Tenta again, calling it a cause for celebration.

The most important complication out of all of this, though, was meeting Alice. Hooking up the way you did felt strange at first, but it didn’t take long for the two of you to get used to each other, not unlike how you got used to Tenta — albeit in a much more amiable way. Soon enough, you were staying around Alice’s house like the two of you were an item. Few days passed where you didn’t see Alice, even if you were out chasing other women at Tenta’s whim. The lonely (though sometimes rewarding) life of constant farming was no substitute for time spent with Alice now, even if the whole situation could be bonkers, to say the least.

In the midst of starting off your happy life together with Alice, Yukari intruded to inform

“Sex is the consolation you have when you can’t have love.”
—Gabriel García Márquez

From yonder tale >>/others/65260. This happens at the end of chapter 14 in thread 6, specifically following these bits, if you are in need of context:
>>/others/67515
>>/others/67524
>>/others/67525
>>/others/67533

A young magician gets rather lewd with an ancient oni.

"Any questions?"

"Umm..." I looked up from the odd crisscross craziness that made up this weird place. It was like someone took a bunch of those funky outsider light tube things, lit them up, and made a grid across the everything of everything, but also nothing, because I keep trying to get at them, but they keep not being gotten at! "...Can you repeat that?"

Sighing for the third time, the great voice asked, "Sister, may I kill her?"

"No." Ohh, a new voice!

The other voice took on a begging boom. "Please?" At least she's polite! Sis always said that politeness was important, so maybe I should let her? Ohh, wait, but then I can't do this job I apparently have!

Decisions, decisions...

"You know as well as I why we cannot. Now, answer her questions, sister."

Sighing for the fourth time now, the voice said, "There are some things you must keep in mind, such as-"

"No, no, before that!" I wasn't really listening, so it'd be nice to start from the top!

Sighing for the fifth time, I could tell that her head was throbbing, as I sensed those cute little nerves doing their thing. "Welcome to the Realm of Dreams, young satori. We have need of your aid for some reason-"

"You never said that the first or the second time!" I put on a pout, as she's making stuff up! That's not very nice!

"-for you possess in you a power rare among not only your kind, but all kinds." Jeez, it's rude to talk over me!

"Take deep breaths, sister." Ohh, it's the nicer one again! Hi, nice one! Ohh, wait, I should use my mouth to talk, right?

The sound of the booming voice taking deep, crinkly breaths from a paper bag filled the air. Thankfully the crinkles were less noisy than her, as that'd be annoying. Like, wow would it be disruptive!

While she did that, I cheerfully greeted, "Hi, nice one!"

"...Hello.

“The difference between sex and love is
that sex relieves tension and love causes it.”
— Woody Allen

This contains heavy spoilers for the obvious.

"Ah, Reimu, thank goodness you're here."

The blue-white is here, I thought. The other shrine maiden. Her name is Sanae. Sanae Kochiya. Disciple of the Moriya Shrine.

"I hope you have a good reason for interrupting my tea time, Sanae," I responded to her. She wore this humbled smile that always ticked me off as she came in. I couldn't stand it.

"Ah, I'm sorry, I know it's a bother, but I just wanted your input on a few things, really." She had been relying on me a bit recently.

"A few things, is this going to turn into a dozen before long, as it usually does?" By bit though, I mean a lot.

"N-No! Not at all! Well, I hope, I mean, it's hard to tell with Lady Kanako at times..." She always acts like this is her first time dealing with gods, even though she is veritably one herself. It ticks me off.

"That's what you say every time I say something like that, Sanae. Don't you have any shame?"

"Sh-Shame!? What does shame have to do about any of this!?" She always acts as if we're not competing for faith. She's so confident and certain about herself and her shrine's deities. That ticks me off too.

"If you don't get it, then don't worry about it, just get on with it..." The way she looked at me was filled with trepidation. Nonetheless, she sat down beside me at the table. She always does. She never misses a beat when it comes to annoying the living hell out of me.

"Well, you see, Lady Kanako has been talking about... well, me, recently." She's always relying on me, for issues from her job, to more personal ones. It's like I'm her only real friend here in Gensokyo. Jeez, I can't stand that.

"You, huh? Is she worried about you or something?" I asked with a tired breath as I took another sip of my tea. It was still hot, and reminded me that there were better things to life than being this kid's nanny.

"I suppose. She seems to think I should be doing something with my life. She keeps reminding me that while I'm a deity here, I'm st

The Moon is eternal.

When Lord Tsukuyomi first trod this pure earth, aeons ago, He set out to create a haven everlasting. Attended by divine spirits, His will impervious, His people under His wing, our Lord raised from the fragile sands of the Moon’s deserts a kingdom to linger in perpetuity. I was there. Shapeless then – my form and Fate yet undefined. My shames not yet past. But I was there; and I drank of Lord Tsukuyomi’s words as he spoke a new era into being.

It gladdens me to remember this. It helps me to maintain my pace as I walk. It lets me cope with the fact.

The fact that I, Kishin Sagume, am currently wearing no panties.

As I near my destination, deeper in the casern of the Lunar Palace, I begin to pass by rabbits rushing to their morning chores. The females, plump and bright, curtsy at my approach; the males, stern and red-eyed, nod their heads in obeisance. None stop for long. The slave race may possess senses keen beyond our formal recognition, but they daren’t question a Lunar lord – even in their own domicile. I acknowledge, with a nod and a smile, a cluster of rabbits who had visibly slept ill the previous night. They blush when I do so. Yet I see their crumpled ears perk up a little as I stride past. This will tide them over the day. For reasons unfathomable to me, the rabbits seem to value my attention over that of other masters.

Some, perhaps, value it a touch too high. Or would that be too low? I am unsure still when I reach my goal.

One billet among a hundred. No plaque, no individual marks. It shames me to know exactly where I am anyway.

I do not knock. Knocking is for the help. The door slides aside as surely as it would have if I had. It does its own knocking when I shove it closed behind me. The noise of activity outside softens to a murmur. I blink my eyes, adjusting to the dim lighting in the room. The billet is narrow. Narrower than some rabbits would call narrow otherwise. It is enough, just hardly, to fit a strip of floor, a low eating table, a single cot made to fold up into the wall, and a writing desk tucked under the window, opposite the door.

Those, as well as a lone figure slouched in a chair

Anyone got something? Post here

It was hard for Kosuzu Motoori to discern when exactly she fell in love with the carpenter’s son.

A barely-legal bookkeeper does coitus with the hero of this story.