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Thread 33252 hidden. Un-Hide Thread
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33252No. 33252hidewatchexpandquickreply
Yeah, I know. I've got a couple stories that already require attention, yet I decided to start on this. However, I've been wanting to do this for quite a while and have worked it out to where it shouldn't be the mess the first one is, and I hope that the changes to the formula will be accepted.

Also, even if it looks serious, it won't be overplayed. And even if I forget that, well, there's more to the story this time than the short incident ahead.

---

I'm rather terrible at introductions, so I'm not going to go into too much detail about myself. I will say that my name is Wade Trenton, I'm 18, white, and trying my hardest to make sense of things.

About... Three months ago I started to practice lucid dreams since my home life is pretty dull and I've been a bit frustrated lately. Oh sure, I have good friends to call on, a loving cat for a pet, and more than enough physical prowess to get to said friends and to visit plenty of places, but I can't impose on them to the degree required to live away from my folks. Hence, I still have to go home at night, and I still need to put up with those I don't get along with. And since my dreams are pretty random, not to mention that half the time I can't recall them, I decided to take up lucid dreaming as a hobby. At first it didn't work out so well since the techniques used require a lot of practice, which resulted in some hazy images that I had little control over. Mostly of a nighttime landscape and a strange blonde girl with wings, along with one with wings.

I couldn't interact with them, and despite my being interested in finding out more about them I found that once I ironed out the techniques I was unable to interact with them. When I 'woke up' in the lucid dream, I was always in front of a strange mansion with an impossibly large flower garden. The door to the mansion was locked, so the first time I decided to walk along the path that leads away from the building. I saw a blonde woman in a red dress and a sun hat sitting next to the open gate, but she was sleeping at the time. I tried to just will her awake since I thought
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>>No. 34408
>>34405
I blame the previous story and sometimes a mere long sword isn't enough against Wade's fragments.
>>No. 34410
>>34405
Because we are dealing with the metaphysical manifestation of the fragments of a broken mind (that can shoot lasers, bend earth, make constructs, use fire...). A mere longsword is not enough, and then the people started to think the most overkill way to deal with them.
>>No. 38143
http://www.grasses.co.il/Assets/Slider/eHvor-Selges-Parajumpers-I-Oslo-11.htmlhttp://www.grasses.co.il/Assets/Slider/eHvor-Selges-Parajumpers-I-Oslo-1
1.html
http://www.pacificcarpetcare.com.au/cp/Scripts/h-Parajumpers-Online-Store-Canada-6-ei.hthttp://www.pacificcarpetcare.com.au/cp/Scripts/h-Parajumpers-O
nline-Store-Canada-6-ei.htmlml


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33879No. 33879hidewatchexpandquickreply
Chronograph, noun.

An instrument used to record time with great accuracy.

---

You watch the old man on his bed, wheezing his last words quietly,

“Time is a terrible thing, my apprentice. The threads of time are transient, tumultuous, terrifying. You should abandon this pointless endeavour before you lose what precious time you have left.”


---

As a human, your time in the world is limited. Enough to stay your course or to change your ways. And as a human, your time will come, if not today, perhaps tomorrow. Maybe even later.

Such is the fragility of human life.
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>>No. 34201
>>34199

That's just it though, sure wanting to leave the vagrants at the main gate is one thing but throughout a larger portion of the village?
>>No. 34205
[X] Just wait for Reimu to get back.
Fighting against the tide here.
>>No. 34219
>>34206

New thread.


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33708No. 33708hidewatchexpandquickreply
This side story functions as a really long prolouge of explainations of a character that is going into ACiG. ACiG will take on two PoV's once this is completed.

-----Prologue: Reflection-----

“It is not about the weapons or the tactics. It is about The People and their ideals and their morals that came together with weapons and tactics at the precise moment to produce a True Cause.”

This journey has been a long one. In this journey you have changed greatly. You, but a teenager finally turning 15 in the next week, have experienced many things that the average teenager won’t face. Things that the average teenager should never have to face. You have spent your life training for war. You have survived the war. You may be 70 years into the future, but your home country, China, has come out as a strong nation after the war. And you too, have come out as a strong and independent teenager after the war. Here in Gensokyo, after this long journey may you finally settle down and take a rest. But you feel uncomfortable. As if though something was telling you that you are missing something dire in your past, in the swirling midsts of time. You feel like you are forgetting something. What has gotten you here?

-----Chapter 1: Early Childhood-----

“Stand up!” your father shouts into the pre-dawn sky. Well, your foster father. You never truly knew your blood father, for he gave you up to the government to be put in a foster home with a lineage of martial artists or swordsmen. And that, you foster father was. Every morning, before the sun rose, he woke you up to train with the blade. And of course that is what you did. You would keep at him until you would land a hit on him. You’d get knocked down again and again, but you’d focus on what fundamentals went wrong, and improve them. That is what you father taught you. The fundamentals. And that when life knocks you down, when a stronger nation bullies China, to stand back up and keep at it until you make them pay in blood. He told you that he’d teach you the advanced techniques after you mastered the fundamentals. Unfortunately, you only got to master the fundamentals before you left for the
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>>No. 33966
Here is the update I took so long on.
Part I
-----

“Geez,” you think to yourself as you pedal your bike toward the Forest of Magic. You’ve met with a friend you assumed was in a retirement home somewhere, aging away his last years of his life, only to find out that he was not just alive, but youthful as well. He too, had been displaced into the future like you. However, he had been displaced years after you had, and the result was he’s already a grown man in his twenties, while you are still in your mid teens. However, time and age cannot separate comrades, brothers, or Children of The Revolution.

You’ve found out quite a few, peculiar things about him. He seems to have only been in Gensokyo for a few days at this point, his first few days being spent knocked out. More importantly, however, is the fact that many women see the qualities in him that are Truly Inspiring. They are so inspired and attached to them, that some have developed... feelings for the man. However, this man, raised in the cauldron of war and the blood of his comrades, knows little about love. Communism speaks greatly about what political and economical changes it wishes to employ, but beyond equality and destruction of classes, it speaks little about person to person social structure.

Alek thus wasn’t even close to ready to deal with such a sudden surge of love towards him. You found this out when you spoke with Suika, who was truly captivated by Alek’s Inspiring Ideals and his Dream. But Alek had spent time with Shinki and Reimu all day today, completely oblivious to the longing of Suika, or more likely, completely overwhelmed by the whole situation. Thus, it was up to you to create time for Suika. You can only hope that she uses it wisely now. This is her time to shine through; to have a place in Alek’s heart.

Your destination is Alice’s House, up to the Hakurei Shrine, back to the school, and then to Miss Byakuren’s temple on your growing but still muscle-deprived limbs. The task didn’t seem hard at the time you came up with the plan, but you now see how far you overestimated your ability to do long journeys on a bike while still going at a fast pace to
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>>No. 33971
You’ve been pretty tense recently. High strung. Not calm and collected as you ought to be and usually are. So what if Yukari shows up on your way? So what if Yuyuko or Mima could screw over your plans? Being a paranoid fourteen year old who’s had twelve too many bottles of high-fructose corn syrup laden cola won’t help your plan. Revolution marches forth, into the unknown, torch and flag in hand.

Shinki lands at the top of the stairs that lead to the shrine, setting you down before flying back to Alice’s house. That was a fast flight, only 30 seconds or so. You look at the shrine. The Hakurei Shrine. Well, if you were Alek, you’d just walk into the grounds blazing with communism, but you don’t have that kind charisma. You’ll just walk in normally, but cautiously. A Communist needs to have caution; Stalin’s lack thereof and overconfidence led to the failed attempts at a counter offensive after the repulsion of Germans from Moscow. That in turn led to a bloody halt, which allowed the Germans to drive south to Stalingrad. You can’t afford such a colossal mistake.

No one’s here. Suspicious. Youmu definitely should be back here by now. The Princess is missing as well, and you don’t see a trail of missing vegetation. Then again, you’d only see that if the rumors of her being a hungry ghost are true. You need to cut back on the Aya Tabloidspropaganda machine newspapers. As well as the random asides you tend to have in your head.

As you near the shrine, you hear sounds originating from within. You confirm that these are the voices of Yuyuko and her servant Youmu, along with the sound of sizzling food. This is further confirmed by the pleasant smell that emanates from the shrine. You also hear another, muffled voice that you can only assume is Mima. Perfect. They are a self serving distraction, so you shouldn’t have any proble–

The shrine doors slide open, and your pseudo sniper eyes, trained for distance shots with no magnification iron sights, instantly pick out Yuyuko, Youmu...and Yakumo.

Yakumo. She hasn’t noticed you yet, or at least she puts on that appearance. Every muscle in your body tenses up as adren
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>>No. 33973
“So Reimu convinced me that her love life is her business, and that I can’t dictate it, so I suppose you can tell Alek he’s got my approval. But geez, sharing a guy you like because you love him? I’m worried that Aleksandr might be abusive or manipulative...” Keine expresses her worries to you, and with good reason. Before the advent of Communism, Polygamy stood for oppression and inequality, standing against all of The Great Ideals. But here, love is not for social or economic status. It is not forced in any nature. It is solely voluntary, stemming from a true love that could only arise in the magical land of Gensokyo, free of most worries that The Outside faced.

“Don’t worry Miss Keine, he’s a kind hearted man. If he really just wanted to have sex with women, he wouldn’t have told them that he was conflicted in love. Nor would he, a Soviet with steel-hard sense of direction and views, be so lost as to ponder so much over his course of action. Only when something as magical as love is involved is a True Soviet like Alek lost. And he was conflicted, truly lost in the mountains of love that rose around him, and from the inner conflict within his own heart,” you respond, insisting that his uncharacteristic lack of direction can only stem from something revolutionary to him: love.

“But he is still the same strong Soviet he has been for the past five years or so of his life. When duty calls, when his friends or family are in danger, he will not think twice about using his body to take the blow, the point of a sword, or the bite of a bullet. He is lost in love, but he is not a lost soldier. He is ready to strike down the corruption and evil that stems from unwanted inequality. He is a Soviet Ace of the Skies, not a playboy of the heart. His life has been innocent, aside from a merely-rumored childhood love in Japan with a girl who has long since died. A girl that he had to avenge. Such an act only proves his undying loyalty to those that he loves,” you assert.

“You don’t hurt those he cares for, regardless of whether they’re in their teens or are as ancient as eternity itself. He himself is too afraid to hurt them, and thus, the Great Soviet Fam
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33649No. 33649hidewatchexpandquickreply
Finally. Although you knew what you wanted to do with your life long before you came of age, it certainly took you long enough after doing so to build up a decent nest egg for it. Your former boss didn't pay the best, but he was the only tailor that was hiring, and you needed to learn if you wanted to open a shop of your own. You're pretty sure he kept back a few tricks of the trade, but you know enough to make rough but serviceable clothing.

That's all behind you now, though, and you gaze at the village paperwork for opening a new shop in your hands. All you need to do is fill it out and wait for it to be processed, and the village will have a new clothing shop in the abandoned lot that's on the way to the Hakurei Shrine.

At least legally. As of yet, you haven't gotten a means of construction or done anything to make your store stand out, so if nothing changes, your shop will be dead in the water. Luckily, shops are approved for commerce just before harvest, which just passed, so you have about a year to advertise, learn more about tailoring, find new sources of materials, and get your shop built.

So why does the child of two farmers want to open a clothing shop? Well, it probably has something to do with your ability. When you are wearing a set of clothes related to a profession, you somehow gain the instincts of an expert in that profession. It seems to be related to how well-made the outfit is, although it's seemingly a bit different in the case of your casual wear. Also, you can instantly change outfits, though the magic only seems to work on clothing you yourself own.

Anyway, you propably should get to filling out those forms. Most of it is standard stuff like name, gender, purpose of shop, location of shop, although a few of the later questions suggest whoever was in charge of this was fooling around.

[x] Name:
[x] Gender:
[x]Purpose of Shop: Tailor
[x]Location of Shop: Road to Hakurei Shrine
[x]Power: Power of clothing
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>>No. 33868
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33868
Update, damn it.
>>No. 34515
>>33868
I'm trying, but it turns out updates don't just appear at the bottom of a word file if you keep putting writing off, and pretty soon it's several months later with nothing to show for it.

I think part of the reason I'm doing so bad is that I had absolutely no plan at all and was pretty much just making it up as I went along. I'm currently working on the mechanics and characterizations for everyone, and opportunities. On the subject, why on earth did I not not give anon the option to open business whenever? That'd have been way more interesting.

Anyway, that will probably take me a while, but at some point, quite possibly way in the future, I will either resume this story or make a another run, and it will hopefully be better for the planning.

For the meantime, though, this is going to have to be a hiatus. Sorry.
>>No. 34518
>>34515
What the hell is it with writers and not having any sort of plan? Don't people ever learn!?

Now that I got that out of my system, good luck in the future.


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12261No. 12261hidewatchexpandquickreply
Estabilishing connection...
...
...
...
DATA LINK estabilished
Accessing genetic memory databank...
...
WARNING
DATA STREAM DAMAGED
Commencing advanced decypheration processes
...
...
Starting visual transmission in
Three
Two
One
...


"Whew."
With a sigh, you put down the pen. Before you, an endless wall of mostly illegible characters spreads on the white, lined surface of multiple notebooks.
Math. Oh, how you hate math.

It's been 4 days since you have returned from Gensokyo. Altough the work that you found isn't too tiring (as long as there aren't too many people to teach), the stuff at University... Yeah, those few days of absence made you fall back in material pretty far. At some point, you even considered dropping out, but Renko's harsh lecture about the necessity of education made you reconsider working your ass off to catch up. Renko, Renko...

Leaning back in this messy room, you let your thoughts run loose.
Yeah, Renko. Ever since your return she's been a little bit... Distant. Kind of... Left out.
Your and Mary's continuous efforts to cheer her up and convince her to spent more time with you fell on barren earth. As if she was...
Maybe it's because you and Mary have become too close to each other? After that one 'incident' back at the Shrine, the two of you would sometimes hang out together. Maybe Renko feels the same as Mary did when she was left out?
Left out.
Yeah, that has to be it.
But... How to convince that stubborn girl to get closer to you?
"Argghhh!" Rolling around the floor in irritation, you scratch your head. "Complicated! Renko, you're complicated!"

Ding, ding.

A sound of doorbell interrupts your reverie.
... it's already dark outside, so who could that be...?

[ ] Answer the door
[ ] Nah, if it's urgent, they'll come in through the window
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>>No. 33810
hell yes
>>No. 33812
This was glorious.
Also glad to see it finally finished(?), up for some more revivals like this?
>>No. 33815
File 132528775460.jpg - (59.17KB, 400x579, d25d1c130cec266b186f77ada3dab2be.jpg) [iqdb]
33815
>>33812
Go take a look in /shorts/ if you haven't already.


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33337No. 33337hidewatchexpandquickreply
“Do you fear death?”

Now, here is a question I was asked once in life. Being naive and young, the answer I proclaimed was a resounding “Yes!”

I’ve since learned better.

So, the way I see it. Death is nothing to fear. Generally, it is not something to look forward to, but to fear it is meaningless. You will die one day, that is a fact. The reaper always collects his two gold coins. To live dreading your day of terminality means you have simply wasted your life in fruitless struggle. Most people simply live their lives with the thought buried deep in the backs of their minds. They are always aware of it, yet choose to consciously repress and ignore it. This is beneficial to them in the long run I presume to say, since they can then live their lives to the fullest potential.

I, on the other hand, cannot afford such luxury. My life has been lived, and my day has come and gone. I have paid my two gold coins. Without the need for such prose; I am dead.

How dead, you ask? Very. Take for instance, the wood that composes your floorboards. How long has it been there, you reckon? Ten years? Twenty? Now, think for a second that it all was once a tree. Or several trees, if your curiosity is more morbid than most. Remember now that trees are alive, and that the wood beneath your feet was once as well. It’s pretty dead now, isn’t it? I can say without fear of rebuke that I am far, far deader than some squeaky old floorboards.

But the dead don’t move, now do they?

Funny thing, that. I clearly remember being dead. Or dying to put it more accurately. And I have the faintest notion that I was at one point buried. Now, Gods-know-how-long later, I’m all dug up and moving around like it was yesteryear. It is a bit of a weird feeling, being essentially a walking corpse. Nobody really believes in zombies until they are one, that’s a damned fact.
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>>No. 33778
[X] Installing Gentoo
>>No. 33796
[X] Look Yoshika, we were trying to make it so your slave-driver that you unfortunately have to call 'master' gives up on you, thus having you gain freedom. Hence why we do as bad a job as we can and bend any orders in either the most literal or silliest way possible, whichever is funnier.
-[x] Acquire milk from the deadbeat.
>>No. 33797
[x] Go: Dennis


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31346No. 31346hidewatchexpandquickreply
Formatting line.

Formatting line

Formatting line

==


[X] “What was that? Sorry, I couldn't hear you over the sound of your legs.”


Make amour, not war...

“—get your blasted hands off my—!”
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>>No. 32083
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32083
>>32081
Your Reimu is really adorable, like a toasted muffin: It looks hard, strong yet inviting on the outside and, after you take a bite, you realize that it's much softer and sweeter than you ever imagined.
That said, if I had to choose which is the best for shooter, I'd go with Mokou. They seem kinda alike: sarcastic, strong, mature and funny all around. Let's be honest here: someone who forgave so much from a man is pretty much entitled to him for all eternity.

If you're smart, you probably realized I never answered your question. Though if you were smarter, you'd have realized that I did. I choose Mokou as 'the best for shooter' which pretty much implied that the best for me would me... that Eternally capricious shrine maiden.
>>No. 32084
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32084
>>32081
I think all your girls are, without a doubt, really cute. But I personally fell in love with Mokou here! Among all the stories I have read - your Mokou is the BEST one!
>>No. 32089
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32089
>>32084>>32083>>32082
Thanks, you have no idea how giddy it made me to read those comments. Really, really, thank you very, VERY much for those. I love you. Honestly, I do.
Unfortunately, it's been raining all the blooming week, meaning I haven't been able to as much as touch my work, sadly. For which I apologise. I ought to get back on track soon. I've got a load of paperwork to do in the meantime, but I should be done with it before Monday or so. Expect a surprise update within the next few days.
Thanks again, really. Those posts made my day. I can't say when, but I definitely will see you soon.

Until then, folks. Until then.


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24650No. 24650hidewatchexpandquickreply
In an almost reflective action, I tried to contact the otherworldly magician.

…I forgot how to. My brain didn't want to cooperate fully. It felt fuzzy and swirly. I just ended up mumbling something. “...lovely.”

“So you will cooperate?” Alice mistook my mumble for assent.
“This has nothing to do with Marisa.” I slurred more than I wanted to. “Mai magic was a gift, alright? She's not my type and I definitely didn't do nothing with her, ok?” I rambled on a bit, seeing she didn't immediately say anything. “Look, you seem more serious about the magic thing,” I tried to look at her seriously, “But I'm not sided with anyone, so I have no allegiance to, uh, drop. So if it came down to between you and her...”

You thought you saw her raise an eyebrow.

“Wait. I don't even really know what you're talking about. 'Cooperate against her when the time comes'? What the hell... this better be about one of Suika's games.”
“This is not as petty as that.” She informed me dryly. “And you already know about it. If not,” She seemed to entertain an idea momentarily, “I pity you. That means she used you and did not even have the decency to explain. That would be a result of her warped personality, I suppose...”
“I already told you, I did nothing with her.”
“Indeed.” She said with a dry voice that indicated she believed otherwise.
“...Is this some kind of magician's feud? If you're going to fight, I want no part of it... I owe nothing to either of you, and I want no part of that.”
“We'll just how much you owe soon enough.”

Her words sounded like a bit of a threat, making me wonder if she was going to do something to me. I took that as my cue to just leave her. I thought to walk to the party, leave her alone.

“Look, I can't tell you about where I learned magic. It's just an awesome and powerful source, probably better than her.” I moved, turning away from her.
“We're not done here.” Alice reacted strongly to my attempt to end the conversation. As soon as my back was turned to her, I found myself pressed agains
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>>No. 25243
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25243
>>25242
As long as there's more Reimu (at least eventually), I'm happy. If you had said "CHAPTER END" or something in the first place, most of this could have been avoided.
>>No. 33308
I just noticed something....
We're shinji ikari...
>>No. 33309
Oh, for cryin' out loud...

This thread was two years gone. Cease your vile necromancy. Learn to sage.


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33015No. 33015hidewatchexpandquickreply
You weren't really on the high end of the oni pyramid. If you were placed anywhere, you were pretty sure you'd be on the bottom if it wasn't for your treasured possession shackled onto your right hand. Although, you always thought the parties got too wild sometimes. Taking a big sigh, you think to yourself. Why did you feel so bitter about it...? You didn't even like being with the others. You throw a stone down the underground bridge's pit. From the bottom, it responds with a small 'clink.' You feel a tap on your shoulders. A small oni with two protruding horns on her head gives you a wide smile. It's Suika, one of the Four Devas. She'd be on the top of your figurative pyramid. She boasts a strong winning percentage against the other oni - a whopping one hundred percent. Not to mention she parties. Hard.

“Whatcha doing here? It's awfully lonely to be here all by yourself!” Suika grins mischievously, a twinkle in her eyes. She can barely stand still, stumbling around a bit as she attempts to reach for your arm. With a fumbling tug, she latches on.

“But I-”

“Come on, let's get wasted!” Not waiting for the rest of your answer, she drags you out of your sitting position and moves you over to the oni bar. With a determined look in her eyes, she yells out, “Two of your strongest whatever you have, please!” A moment later, she passes you some clear, transparent alcohol. She chugs it in one go, slamming the empty glass on the table. “You next!”

Still unsure of the suspicious liquid, you contemplate drinking it or not. Not really caring, you decide to drink it anyways, gulping it down and burning your throat. But it feels good, and you think it's worth it to have a few more shots. You look over to the little oni. She wobbles from side to side, almost losing her balance.. You feel just a tad inebriated after drinking a few more cups of whatever the heck the clear stuff was, but you remain alert. In order to keep this treasure, you had to be.

Maintaining the facade of drunken cheeriness, you keep a good watch, particularly at one oni looking at you, sneering. Suika is a
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>>No. 33244
[x] Go ahead and help Tenshi
>>No. 33249
It's been around three weeks since I last updated, but fear not (whoever is still reading this story), as I will return eventually. I'm just trying to consistently update my /at/ story shameless advertising, as well as being really busy over the last few weeks. Hopefully an update this week will come.
>>No. 36827
It has been a little bit over a week. Hiatus.


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32514No. 32514hidewatchexpandquickreply
A new thread? Why, you may ask?

I think it's appropriate since it's the beginning of the true end.

---

...Well, it's been the better part of two months since you were last given a glimpse into my life, and it's pretty much winter now. It goes without saying that things have happened since then, but this story's gotta end sometime right? A lot happens in sixty days, sure, yet at the same time you'd probably get bored out of your skulls since Gensokyo's not exactly known for being exciting when there isn't anyone causing problems. For me, it's mostly been patching things up with Marine since I absolutely refuse to let her go, even when she's made it plain and clear that she wanted nothing to do with me.

The problem with that is the small fact that what she's saying is out of reaction rather than rational thought, so I had absolutely no issue with giving her some room to cool down before approaching her about the issue once more, this time with more sensitivity on my part. She was in turn more receptive to me which made it easier to talk to her. She was obviously hurt and upset, but at the same time she was acting more like her usual self by taking jabs at me while making some rather confused attempts to tease me about my choice in women. I admit she was a bit harsher than usual in that regard, but it'll pass. I know it will.

Naomi had more or less adjusted to how things have turned out, though I've had to rescue her from a Yakumo-style marshmallow hell more than once. I know Yukari thinks she's cute, but honestly, the artist needs to breathe. There's also the fact that she's having to understand that there are those I care about also care about her and would love nothing more than to get to know her in a romanitc way. Such is the way of Yukari Yakumo: Gather up all you love, then express your love for them until they're too tired to do anything other than lay in your arms. I was a bit peeved at her for expressing herself that way to Naomi without letting me know, but at the same time the gap youkai made a point of dating her first.

...I know I d
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>>No. 33179
SLDT, You make it seem like a Mary Sue is a bad thing, always. However, It's common knowledge that any stereotypical thing like 'all ocs are bad' can be disproven with a great writer such as yourself. You made literally the perfect Mary Sue, everyone liked him here, no one hated him. There's always going to be small flaws in a certain characters design, and if anything you avoided as many of those as possible. Honestly, I wouldn't give a rats ass if an MC could do anything and everything, making every touhou into his bitch and conquer the universe or god knows what; no, I only care about the writer and how well he's written said story.

You've stunned me yet again SLDT. Keep up the amazing work, And I'll see you in your next story.
>>No. 33180
>>33179
While I didn't hate him, his boring-invincible-hero-ness was very boring.
>>No. 33181
>>33179
Indeed I had fun with it, though it's a type of scenario one should avoid. He was just lucky enough he was able to spin it to something fun. Otherwise he'd have ended up like Hat (Average Joe's writer)


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