⋮ No. 58102 ► 
I actually thought the previous thread would be the last one. Guess not.
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>>/sdm/57814 ------------------------------
For a long moment I stare at the two women, smiling happily, letting myself seem the very image of good cheer. After a minute, I let the smile slide off my face. "Anyway, that's enough playing around, don't you think? Let's get to business."
Shakily, Yorihime gets to her feet. "You... you don't DARE let those pictures get out, you hear me?!"
I shrug. "Yukari has copies of them. It's really up to her. She's just being nice, and letting me handle the negotiations."
"I have every confidence in Meiling's diplomatic skills!" Yukari sings out from the shadows.
Toyohime gets to her feet as well, trying hard to conceal as much skin as she can. "...There's no way people will believe those pictures! You have shapeshifters here in Gensokyo, photographs can be doctored..."
I shrug. "If its your reputations on the moon you're worried about, don't your people have the technology to determine if a photo has been faked? The way I hear it, you're always rambling on about your scientific and technological wonders." The two don't respond, instead looking away with worried expressions on their faces. I nod and start flipping through a set of the photos. "Thought so. As for us using shapeshifters to fake these... well, said shapeshifters would have had to get a VERY good look at your body to imitate everything so perfectly. Either way, it doesn't make you look good. And, of course, there's the video of you two getting clobbered like you were in a slapstick show... THAT would do wonders for your reputation, now wouldn't it?"
There's a long moment of silence. Toyohime clutches at her replacement clothing nervously, while Yorihime's eyes bore into my own. After a while, the Lunar swordswoman slumps. "Why are you doing this?" she asks me.
I start shuffling the stack of pictures. "Because you appall me. Those who claim to have obtained enlightenment should not spend so much time tearing others down for their own amusement and self-aggrandizement. Because there are so many holes in your philosophy that you simply ignore. Most importantly? You insulted my employer and her new bride." I stare at them. "There was no need of it. It served no purpose. They were merely insults for the sake of insults. I will not tolerate this."
Toyohime looks uncomfortable. "...We were only saying that a supposed union between a blood-drinking parasite and a supposedly holy shrine maiden is-"
"None of your concern," I interrupt. "Reimu was merely doing her job, making sure that there was no disruption to Gensokyo's balance. Remilia was coming along for moral support because she already KNEW how you would act. It required a conversation of sixty seconds, tops. You could have answered a few simple questions, and then been left in peace." I stare at them. "You protect the moon from interlopers, and yet you refuse to show courtesy when visiting someone else. Oh, one other thing: do NOT refer to either one of them as a 'parasite' or 'supposedly holy' again, do you understand?"
Toyohime looks away. "...Yes. I apologize."
Yorihime looks at me with a defeated expression on her face. "What do you want?" she asks me.
I stand up. "It's what YOU want, and that is for this video, and these pictures, to NEVER see the light of day, ever."
"We want all of the copies," Yorihime insists.
"No," I say flatly. "You are not in a bargaining position here. At all. Yukari has given me her word that the evidence will be released, or concealed, on my word alone. If you're dumb enough to take that as a reason to take action against me, Yukari will use her own discretion on distributing these pictures. You don't want that."
Both sister turn very pale. "Noted," Yorihime says, her voice dry.
"What you are bargaining for is for us to keep this evidence concealed for all time. Video and photographs both. We will be keeping the copies, however, in case you try to renege on your half of the bargain. Which I can see you doing. Frankly, we don't trust you."
"Then why should we trust you?!" Toyohime demands.
"Because I give you my word as a warrior, and because you have no choice," I reply. The Lunarians look unhappy, but seem to accept this. I nod and continue. "These are our terms. They are non-negotiable." I start ticking points off on my fingers. "One: you will make a formal apology to Reimu and Remilia. We are willing to keep it out of the public eye, but there will be attendees to this apology, and it will be recorded."
The Watatsukis wince at this. I continue. "This apology will be signed by all related parties; namely the two of you, the Ladies Hakurei, and also a third party witness. Specifically, Eirin Yagokoro." The two groan at this. "As part of this apology, you will agree to be on your best behavior whenever visiting Gensokyo. If you can't be polite to people, fine; then at least leave them in peace. No one cares about your philosophy, and we don't want to hear about it, or listen to your opinions on our lifestyle."
The Watatsukis look away, looking a little ashamed. Good, maybe I'm getting through to them. "Aside from that, you must also get them a gift as an apology. It's up to you what it is, and it doesn't have to be extravagant, but it needs to symbolize a GENUINE apology. No covert insults."
Toyohime nods slowly. "We understand. Will there be anything else?"
I consider it for a moment, then let a slow, mysterious smile cross my face. "Yes, actually. We would like you to attend a special party after the official apology. A friend of mine suggested it. It's a way to to get to know one another, and let bygones be bygones. This at least, is optional on your part. We won't push it if you really don't want to."
The two Lunarians look at each other, then nod fractionally. Toyohime then nods at me, trying to salvage whatever dignity she can. "Very well. Perhaps our words were... unnecessarily opinionated. In the interests of smoothing things over, we shall happily attend this gathering of yours." I smile benignly. I wonder how long they'll attend around before running screaming from Koakuma's Makai-style party. Behind me, Yukari starts snickering, causing Toyohime to regard her warily. "...Why are you laughing?"
"You just look so cute in those outfits! I just can't help it~!" The gap youkai sings back. Toyohime and Yoyohime glare back, and the swordswoman of the pair glares at me.
"Then, may we at least have our clothing back?!" she demands.
I think about it. "No." She groans in response.
************************************************
I step out of the mansion and stretch. What a long night. The stars are still out, but I can see a reddish glow on the horizon. Dawn must be coming, then. I shake my head, hardly able to believe it. Somehow, I pulled it off. I beat the Watatsuki sisters, and now I'm going to get them to apologize to Reimu and Remilia. Wow. Just... wow. This is so awesome. I look around the mansion grounds, wondering where Malla has gotten off to. I haven't seen her since the bamboo forest; I hope she isn't up to any mischief.
A voice jars me out of my ruminations. "Meiling!" turning my head to the side, I see Reisen flying over the wall and landing, walking towards me with a smirk on her face. "So how'd it go?"
"We have come to an agreement," I reply, "You will, of course, be invited to the formal apology they'll be giving." Reisen snorts with laughter. "How's Eientei taking it?"
"The Earth rabbits are howling with laughter. So's Kaguya, she thinks that the whole thing's hilarious. As for Eirin, she just rolled her eyes and facepalmed a little. I think she's a little disappointed in them, but I'm not sure if it's for their attitudes, for getting their butts kicked in that way, or both. She'll go along with whatever happens, though."
I nod. "Good. I'm glad to hear that."
Reisen looks troubled. "Anyway, that's not why I'm here. You see, after you disappeared with the sisters, that little fairy of yours was seen running around Eientei, asking about Kaguya's room." Really? Well, Malla did seem very interested in the Lunar princess. "That would be fine, except that Kaguya was in the bath at the time. When she got back to her room, the fairy wasn't there... and something was missing."
I wince. "Oh, no. Malla stole something? What was it?"
Reisen hesitates. "The robe of the fire-rat."
I stare at Reisen for a long moment, considering the ramifications of a pyromaniac forest-fire fairy getting her hands on a powerful, fire-based magical artifact. As I do, I realize that the red glow on the horizon is flickering a little, and is not where the sun would be rising. I also smell the vague scent of ash on the wind. When Reisen follows my gaze and turns very pale, that pretty much clinches things.
I have a very bad feeling about this.
[ ] Stay calm.
[ ] Quickly investigate.
[ ] PANIC.
[ ] (Write-in).
⋮ No. 58116 
I found something neat!
And it's all thanks to Miss Meiling!
I knew I could count on her! I just had to be patient and wait, and everything would go my way. And it worked! I mean, the mansion's been a lot of fun lately, and I really love having my own firepit, but I can't roast marshmallows all the time! That sucks!
But during the wedding, I met the moon princess. The one with so many nifty treasures. Like that robe I heard about. A robe of fire.
Fire-rat robe. Yeah, that's the ticket.
I don't know what a fire-rat is, but it has fire in the name, so it must be awesome!
So I talked to her during the wedding, and she told me all about herself. And her treasures. And her fire-rat robe. Apparently it's even neater than I thought! It's full of magic, and fire, and magical fire! Just imagine how many marshmallows you could roast with it!
Oh, the princess likes marshmallows, too. That's how I know she's a good person. Because she likes marshmallows! The other two didn't roast marshmallows very well. And my marshmallows came out all stinky, too. That could be because of that green stuff that they were covered in, but I don't think so. Miss Meiling told me that they were mean people, so I think that's why the marshmallows didn't come out very well. They're mean people. I bet they don't even like marshmallows.
But that's not Miss Meiling's fault. Not everyone can be as nice as her, or the pink moon princess, or marshmallows. That's why I'm here! To make everyone happy!
It sure was noisy after Miss Meiling went away with those not-nice people. That made it so easy to find the princess' room! I just shared my marshmallows with the nice bunnies (they're nice because they like marshmallows!) and they told me where to go! And then showed me, because it was hard to find.
But I found it at last! The princess' room, which had all kinds of weird stuff I didn't recognize in it! I had to look through her stuff, and it took a while, and I was in a hurry, too. But I found it! It was buried under a bunch of other stuff, but I found it!
It's big! And red! And warm! I knew it was friendly as soon as I touched it! Now we're gonna go make everyone happy, aren't we Mister Robe? That's right, we are!
Because fire makes roasted marshmallows. Roasted marshmallows make people happy. Therefore, fire makes people happy. It can even make bad people nice! So let's BURN EVERYTHING together, Mister Robe! We'll make people be happy! And then they'll thank us, because they can be happy and eat marshmallows they roast off of their own body!
It's a perfect plan!
Burn everything!
Okay, but I had to get out of the big building, because I know not everyone will understand what I'm doing. But that's okay! They'll understand eventually! Once they're happy! And roasting marshmallows! Roasting while roasting marshmallows!
Roasting!
Marshmallows!
FIRE!
Fire rat robe! That's my new friend!
...And kind of a big friend too. Hm. Not really fairy-size. But that just means that there's so much more fire inside of it! Yeah!
So, I'll just slip it on here... heehee! The sleeves are so long and wide! My arms vanish into them! Actually, it looks like my whole body is vanishing into the fire rat robe! It's so red and warm, it's like I'm being burned alive!
But I'm not roasting marshmallows yet. Maybe later.
......
Hm. Nothing's really happening. I wonder why? Maybe I'm not using it right? Hmmmm... but I want to roast marshmallows. I'm gonna eat a marshmallow while I'm thinking this over. Roasted, of course! Because I'm a happy fairy! And happy fairies roast!
Happy people roast! No matter what kind of person they are! ROAST!
WOW!
Uh, wow! When I went to roast that marshmallow with my magic (practice makes perfect! It's my secret from everyone!) it went all WHOOSH!!! Now my marshmallow is really roasted!
And tasty!
Wow, I must be stronger than I thought! Really strong, because my hand's still on fire! Maybe it's the robe? It feels warm, so it must be full of magic! Fire magic! Yeah, that's it! The fire robe full of fire magic! It's so obvious!
That's why the robe feels so warm! Like I'm burning!
...Oh, and my hand is burning. I mean, really burning. Huh. I can't turn it off. That's weird. No matter how hard I try, I can't turn off the fire. How strange. How tingly. How... kinda painful.
Ow.
Ow.
Ow.
...But I can't stop the burning. That'd mean no roasted marshmallows. That means... the burning is good? The pain is good?
...Makes sense to me! Let's see if I can make everything burn-
OW.
OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW.
HOT.
BURNING.
EVERYTHING BURNING.
ROBE ON FIRE. HAIR ON FIRE. FACE ON FIRE. HANDS ON FIRE. EVERYTHING FIRE.
...This hurts a lot. But it must be a good hurt, right? Right? Right?
OH! My marshmallows are roasting! Yay! I'm roasting them all by myself! This is a good pain! A happy pain! A marshmallow roasty pain! The sweet smells of marshmallows!
And something else too, but it's not marshmallows, so it probably doesn't matter.
It's all so hot! So very horribly hot! Let's share this happy hot pain with everyone! Everything! Everything burning! Burning! Burning! I burn and you burn too! All burn!
Yes! Starting with these funny trees!
Yay! Fire!
Trees on fire! Fire everywhere!
...Oh? There are people here. They're staring at me. Oh, one is the princess, and the other has silver hair and smells like fire. They're staring at me! They must be jealous!
Don't worry, unhappy people! I'm here to make you happy! So let's get started! Come roast marshmallows with me!
COME BURN WITH ME!!!
--------------------------------
Real update tomorrow.
⋮ No. 58125 
Okay.
This is bad, no two ways about it. A psychologically unstable fairy, pretty much the personification of a forest-fire, has just gotten her hands on an extremely powerful magical artifact, and may be burning down the Bamboo Forest of the Lost at this very moment. This is a bad thing. However, there is no reason to panic. None.
For one thing, panicking right now would accomplish nothing. For another, why should I panic? The Bamboo Forest has some very powerful beings in it who could quite easily subdue Malla if she got out of control. People like Eirin, Kaguya, and especially Mokou. I mean, Mokou wields the power of the phoenix! Of course she can counter the power of a forest-fire, right? Even if it is super-charged by an ancient magical artifact of unknown but likely vast power.
That's right, all that I need to worry about is Malla getting clobbered. Worst case scenario, she has to respawn, and then I give her a stern speech about not stealing other people's things. That's right. There's no reason to panic. I am calm.
It just so happens that I am about to investigate in that general direction, because of the extreme likelihood that one of the mansion's fairies is responsible for all of this. I need to nip any problems in the bud before they get to great to handle. That's all.
"...I'm gonna go check this out," I say out loud.
"Yeah..." Reisen nods slowly, "Right. I'll come with you, then."
After leaving a message with one of the fairy guards, I take off with Reisen for the Bamboo Forest. It quickly becomes apparent that something is very, very wrong. The blaze is large, but somehow contained in a perfect circle; a column of flame that stretches up into the sky, shifting back and forth lazily. The column of flame is also moving, gradually shifting along the ground; it seems to be leaving lesser fires in its wake.
No two ways about it, this is abnormal.
Reisen tugs on my sleeve. "We have to land! Let's find Eirin and the others; maybe they know what's going on!" I nod in response, and let Reisen lead me to the ground and into the forest itself. She clearly knows her way around; the moon rabbit rushes through the long stalks of bamboo without stopping, and it takes all of my speed to keep up with her.
I can feel the heat in the air. Whatever is causing that fire, it's HOT. I can smell the ash on the wind, and something else as well. Something sweeter. Burning flesh...? Oh god, yes, I can smell that. I hope people aren't too badly hurt. But there's something else, too... something sugary-
Marshmallows. Dear god, Malla, what are you doing?!
And then both Reisen and I screech to a halt, staring in horror. We see Eirin, Tewi, and a few other rabbits standing around, thankfully unharmed. But they are visibly upset, although 'panic-stricken' would be a better description. Not that I can blame them, mind you. Because the focus of their, and our, attention, lies writhing on the ground in front of them.
I almost don't recognize the writhing piles of flame. I recognize, clinically, that someone is burning alive, but it takes me a moment to notice the sealed red pants, and the scraps of red cloth, to realize who I'm looking at.
Reisen realizes it first. "KAGUYA! MOKOU!" she screams, running forward. I quickly follow after her, wondering why the two immortals are still burning. Their flesh shouldn't be doing that, should it? I mean, with as much as they're rolling around, shouldn't the flames have gone out by now? This is not normal.
Why do they keep burning?
Eirin whirls around. "Both of you, keep back!" she shouts.
Reisen and I screech to a halt. "But... but..." Reisen protests, looking strained.
"They won't stop burning," Tewi informs us, looking very pale. "They've been like this for a solid twenty minutes."
I hear my heart hammering in my ears. "Malla," I breathe.
Tewi nods. "She put on the robe of the fire-rat and tapped into its power. Kaguya realized that it was missing right away, and immediately went after Mokou. The two of them were about to get into it, when they saw Malla... basically turning into a living pillar of fire. I was following them, so I saw the whole thing. Anyway..." Tewi swallows. "Malla did... something. She put a crystal of pure fire into their bodies. They won't stop burning, and we can't get it out!"
"I have the rabbits putting together some fireproof surgical gear," Eirin informs us, "But it'll take some time to get ready. In the meantime, all we can do is stand by these two, and wait."
"...How did this happen?" I murmur, my mind reeling, "I mean, Malla is a forest-fire fairy, but-"
Eirin winces. "There's your response. Malla is just a simple fairy who obtained an item related to her nature, but holding far more power than she could possibly contain. She's been consumed by it. I doubt that she really knows what she's doing right now. That fairy is simply responding to her deepest instincts: to burn everything she touches."
I swallow, somewhat ironically chilled by the revelation. "...I have to talk to her. Maybe... maybe I can talk her down."
Eirin shrugs. "Good luck. Right now, your Malla is more a force of nature than a reasoning being."
"This is just like what happened with Okuu," Reisen murmurs, staring at the flicker of flames in the distance.
"I realize that it's a long shot," I tell Eirin, "But I have to do something. Malla is one of our fairies; she's my responsibility. And plus... this may be partially my fault."
Yeah. Get Malla to set a couple of people on fire. Smooth move, Meiling. Absolutely brilliant. What the hell was I thinking?!
Eirin just nods solemnly. "Good luck," she says, meaning it this time. I nod in response, and run off towards the heart of the flames.
It only takes me a couple of minutes to reach it. The flames are intense; I have to use an old technique to regulate body-temperature just to keep from getting heatstroke. There's no sign of Malla; all I can see are the flames, nearly white-hot and stretching to the heavens.
At first.
Then, as though responding to my presence, the fire... changes. It redirects, with the flames getting weaker on one side, and more intense on the other. It looks for all the world like it's opening up. And in the center of it all, I see her.
She's floating in mid-air. Much of her body is concealed by the long, heavy robe, which whips wildly in the air around her. I can see her hands, or what's left of them; charred-black, skeletal extremities wreathed in flames. Her hair, once black and silky, is on fire. Or possibly IS fire, floating serenely in the breeze, making for an eerie counterpart to the chaotic inferno blazing around her. Her face is strangely intact, lips spread wide in a twisted rictus of joy, eyes nothing but pools of flickering flame. Fire licks out from between her teeth. And she is looking right at me.
"Hello Meiling," comes a high-pitched, reverberating voice, like coals on the fire before they pop. The air visibly sears with every breath that comes out of her mouth. "I hurt. But I'm happy. Because now I can make everyone else happy." Malla gestures to herself, and I see the streaks of bubbling, tarry substance all over her robe. Marshmallow, I realize. She's covered in the charred remains of marshmallows.
The fairy laughs, and the flames seem to laugh with her, a chorus that belongs in the worst part of hell. "Would you like to BURN with me?"
[ ] Attack.
[ ] Reason.
[ ] Retreat.
⋮ No. 58129 
Something tells me Meiling should tip the Moonies off to the Kappa, and ask them about building some form of security system for the Princess's personal room. You know, so THIS doesn't happen again.
[X] Reason. Give her a 'great powers, great responsibility' type talk about why it's wrong to steal other's possessions, and the benefits of asking others for permission before acting on impulse ideas.
-[X] If that doesn't work, Attack; try to lead her to an open area with running water.
>So I talked to [Kaguya] during the wedding, and she told me all about herself. And her treasures...Oh, the princess likes marshmallows, too. That's how I know she's a good person.
Seems in her warped desire for roasted marshmallows, Malla really just wants another friend who shares her hobbies. We should definitely make it a point to have Malla reconcile with Kaguya, and explain the finer parts of her abilities. I just hope the Princess is willing to listen after going through her living incineration.
Also, for some reason my head tells me the Bamboo Forest is next to a river, or at least it's that way for most people's head canons. If that isn't the case, feel free to correct me.
⋮ No. 58130 >>58126 This might actually work. Attacking is silly unless we're fireproof (we aren't), and retreating isn't an option.
[x]Reason.
Speaking of fireproof, I thought Mokou was?
⋮ No. 58134 
I stare at Malla in horror.
This isn't right. How could this have happened? Malla was always a little... eccentric, but how could a basically sweet, harmless little fairy have turned into... this? I'm suddenly reminded of Okuu, and how her loved ones must have felt when she lost control of herself. This is the same thing, isn't it? A basically benign creature receiving power beyond their comprehension- literally- and going completely insane.
The Malla I know is a sweet little thing, who just happened to succumb to an addiction to a certain sugary treat. She was doing better, but I obviously didn't pick up on the cues nearly as well as I should have. How stupid of me! But maybe it's not too late. Maybe I can talk her down, get her to see reason. It's a long shot, but it's worth a try. If I can only separate he from that robe...
"Malla," I say out loud, "I want you to listen to me. This isn't you. This isn't who you are."
Malla tilts her head at me. "What do you mean?" she asked in her sweet, searing voice. "I'm me! I've always been me! You're so silly, Miss Meiling!"
"Malla, you're on fire," I insist, "Doesn't that hurt you?"
The blazing fairy seems to consider this, looking down at herself. "...A little," she admits, "But it's a good pain! This is a good pain to bear! Because now I can make people happy!"
"How?" I ask her, curious as to what's going on in her mind.
"Marshmallows make people happy!" Malla says happily, "And roasted marshmallows make people even happier! And people love to warm themselves at fires, right? That's because fire is good! People like fire, and people like marshmallows! Put them together, and you have roasted marshmallows, which are the best!" The fairy's grin spreads impossibly wide. "So, make people burn, and they'll be even happier! Then they can roast marshmallows all they want! Roasting! Everyone! Happy!" Malla starts laughing maniacally, and I wince at the sound.
Okay. This is bad. This is childish fairy-logic, and I can't just sit Malla down to explain to her why she's in the wrong. I just have to hope that she isn't so far gone that she won't listen to reason.
"Why did you set Kaguya and Mokou on fire, Malla?" I ask, trying hard to keep my voice level.
The burning fairy shrugs. "I knew who they were. The nice princess liked marshmallows. I learned that at the wedding! The fire-lady likes, well, fire. Everyone knows that. But I don't think they like each other. That's so sad. But if they like fire or marshmallows, they should like both! And they should like each other! So I set them on fire! Now they'll burn forever, and can roast marshmallows together and be happy! I MADE THEM HAPPY BY BURNING THEM!"
"How did you set them on fire, anyway?" I wonder out loud, "I mean, Mokou's supposed to be immune to fire, from what I hear..."
Malla giggles eerily once more. "I put some fire in them so that they would burn. The fire-lady was hard, yeah, but I made it work in the end. She actually burns better, because she already had some fire in her!"
"They're in pain, Malla. They're suffering." Please understand, little one. I don't want to have to fight you.
"It's a GOOD pain!" Malla insists, expression not so much as flickering, "It's the pain that makes you happy!"
I shake my head. "You're wrong, Malla. And you're not happy. Not at all." They flames flicker slightly, and Malla stares at me in confusion. I press on. "People don't like being hurt. They like fire, yes... but too much fire is a bad thing. It hurts people. It destroys houses, and takes away people's lives. Did you know that if people eat too many marshmallows, they get sick? That's why it's supposed to be a special treat, not a regular meal."
"People get SICK from eating marshmallows?" Malla asks in disbelief.
"Don't you think we'd eat them all the time if they didn't?" Okay, that's not completely true, but Malla seems to accept that explanation. "Too many marshmallows makes people sick. And fire can hurt people."
"But fire makes things warm!" Malla protests, "And some things HAVE to burn! Out with the old, in with the new!" Of course Malla thinks this way; she's a forest-fire fairy, after all.
"That's true," I reply, "But if there's too much fire, new things won't grow back. And besides that, too much fire makes people feel a lot of pain when they don't have to. They hurt because their bodies are in agony. The hurt because the lost their homes. They hurt because the fire kills their friends and family. They hurt before they die themselves."
"Die?" Malla seems shocked. "But no one dies from fire. People like fire. My sisters don't die from fire. Those two ladies didn't die-"
"Fairies don't die," I remind Malla, "You know that. You and your sisters can come back from nearly anything. But most people don't. Those two earlier? They're immortal. That's the only reason they're still alive. Anyone else would be dead." I sigh. "People like a nice, cozy fire, it's true. But they're scared of fires like this, because these fires don't comfort people. They hurt people."
"No..." Malla shakes her head.
"They kill people."
"No."
"They kill and hurt people, Malla. You're hurting people right now, and if you don't stop, you're going to hurt a lot more people. You're going to KILL people. Do you want that?!"
"NO! NO! I WOULDN'T DO THAT!" Malla is shaking her head wildly, refusing to believe my words.
"It's true, Malla! These fires will kill people, and then they won't come back! They'll die, and they'll stay dead, and it will be all your fault!" I pause, then add "And a dead person can't enjoy marshmallows."
Mall goes very, very, still. She stares at me in absolute horror.
And then she starts to scream.
"NOOOOOOOO!!! I DON'T WANNA HURT PEOPLE, I DON'T WANNA KILL PEOPLE, I JUST WANNA MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY AND EAT MARSHMALLOWS, I'M A GOOD GIRL, I'M A GOOD FAIRY, I'M A GOOD PERSON!!! YOU'RE A LIAR, YOU'RE A BAD PERSON, I HATE YOU MEILING!!! HATE YOU HATE YOU HATE YOU!!!"
Malla starts flailing about in mid-air as the column of flame starts to convulse madly, echoing Malla's mood. Flames lick at the bamboo stalks around her as the forest-fire fairy curls up into a ball, hands clamped over her ears, trying desperately to shut out everything else but her desire to make people happy, her NEED to burn.
Okay. I've managed to push all of her buttons. Now what?
[ ] Attack, quickly!
[ ] Keep the pressure up! Keep talking!
[ ] Fall back and get some help!
⋮ No. 58141 
Apparently, she doesn't want to believe that too much fire can actually kill, so in a way I believe we need to show her.
My idea:
Since Malla has already gotten mad enough, and I believe Meiling can take it (hopefully), we need to get her to attack us with a relatively strong attack, and then play dead.
We know Malla still cares for Meiling, so hopefully we can use the shock that should come over her to get her to calm down. The main problems with this plan are the fact that:
1)Malla might instead get crazier and end up actually destroying Gensokyo
2)The attack could actually be strong enough to kill us, which could then lead to 1
If we could somehow talk to Erin and the others before we try this(corroborate our story/prevent us from actually dying), I would put this into a solid vote.
Maybe if we got her to chase us back to the others before trying it out
"Hey guys, I need you to pretend that Malla's attack actually kills me. Hopefully we can guilt trip her."
"Found you Meiling! This will teach you to talk bad about marshmallows and fire!"
"Malla NO! The fire BURNS! (insert scream)(insert dying guilt trippy quote)
"Meiling? Meiling?! Meiliiiiiiiiiiiiing!!!"
Malla becomes remorseful and returns robe
Just an idea though, and probably a bad one at that.
Sage for non-vote
⋮ No. 58148 
>>58146 inb4 Malla's BFF
I guess it wasn't such a bad idea after all
[X] "If you use too much fire, marshmallows melt"
[X] Attempt calm-down punch.
[X] If that fails, play dead.
-[X] Preferably after talking to the others
⋮ No. 58152 
She's crumbling, breaking down. I have to end this NOW, or Malla might withdraw even further into her delusions, becoming impossible to reach. Or, worse, she might go completely off the deep end and become the kind of dangerous being that doesn't get dealt with by the spell-card rules. The kind that Reimu has to go all-out on. I can't allow that.
"If you use too much fire, marshmallows melt, Malla!" I shout at her.
"NO! SHUT UP!" she screams back.
"If you use too much fire, people get hurt and DIE! Is that what you want? Is that who you want to be?"
"NO NO NO SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!!" Malla is twisting around in mid-air, frantically trying to shut out my words, to no avail. I can't let up now.
"It's the truth and you know it, Malla! You've gone too far this time! Now take off that robe and come with me back to the mansion! It's not too late for you to be a good girl, but you have to stop now!"
Malla trembles with pain both physical and emotional, face twisted with confusion. It reminds me a lot of dealing with Flandre while she was at her worst, really. Deep inside, Malla knows better. She's not a bad girl. But she has instincts she doesn't understand, drives which overwhelm her reason. The only thing that she can focus on is her need to get these feelings OUT somehow, usually by lashing out at something.
So... maybe I can deal with this like I would Flandre?
Slowly, Malla looks up, face twisted into a snarl, shaking her head slowly. "No... no... no, you're wrong... you have to be wrong! You have to-eh?" Malla blinks in surprise at the fact that I'm suddenly right in front of her, having leapt forward while she was distracted with her mental conflict. It's insanely hot, and I'm sweltering, but all I need is one shot-
*SMACK*
-like so, to the side of her head. As I fall to the ground, I quickly back away, looking up at Malla to see what kind of effect I've had.
...Not much, unfortunately. Malla just stares off into space, a look of utter shock on her face. Slowly, this shock turns to a rage as hot as the flames that envelop her. Malla stares down at me accusingly.
"You HIT me," the fairy snarls, "You're MEAN! Now I'm gonna FORCE you to be a good person! BURN WITH ME!" The flames roar to full intensity once again, and I realize that Malla is about to attack me with everything she has.
All right. The technique I've learned to use on Flandre doesn't work here. Probably due to Malla being a fairy, or maybe the out of control magic at play here. Either way, I'm not going to snap her out of it. But Malla's clearly still teetering on the edge. Perhaps another kind of shock would bring her to her senses?
"BURN AND BE GOOD!!!" Malla shrieks, launching a wall of flame at me. My eyes narrow and I leap back into the bamboo trees that are as of yet still unburnt. There's a lot of power in Malla's attack, but not a lot of focus. She's easier to deal with than a completely out-of-control Flandre, that's for sure. In any case, this next trick might be a little dirty, but it's the only thing that I can think of.
As the out of control forest-fire fairy launches another wave of flames at me, I quickly roll to the side and stay low to the ground, slipping my hat off as I do so. Glancing to my side, I see the bamboo trees disintegrate into a pile of ashes. In one swift move, I deposit my hat on top of the ashes and roll away, staying out of sight. The heat grows stronger once again as Malla moves closer.
"You see that?!" the fairy demands, voice trembling with madness and emotion, "I can make anyone be happy! Even you! Even- huh?" The column of flames suddenly fades noticeably. I peek up from my hiding spot and see Malla staring at the pile of ashes crowned with my hat. Her expression is one of absolute shock.
"Meiling?" The ashes don't answer, of course. They aren't know for being good conversationalists. "Meiling, are you all right?" The answer would be obvious to most, but Malla's a little far gone, right now.
Or possibly, unwilling to believe what has just happened.
Slowly, carefully, Malla lowers herself to the ground, and walks forward carefully, as though the ground were made of shattered glass. She comes to a stop next to the pile of ashes and kneels down, dismissing her flames with a wave of her hand when she sees my hat start to smoulder. With shaking hands, Malla reaches out for my hat, extinguishing the flames wreathing her hands as well, so that it is a skeletal, blacked set of digits that take hold of my hat. Red eyes stare in incomprehension.
And then Malla starts to cry. Gentle sobbing at first, quickly escalating to huge, soul-wrenching wails as she clutches my hat to her chest. "No..." the fairy breathes in between sobs, "No. No, no, no, this can't be happening! I didn't mean to! I didn't want to! I'm a good girl, really! I JUST WANTED TO MAKE YOU HAPPY! I... I..." Malla takes a deep breath, "I'M A BAD GIRL!!!" With no strength left to support her, the fairy topples over onto her side, sobbing and wailing uncontrollably.
The sight tugs at my heart, reminding me of a certain vampire when she thought she'd gone too far. But sometimes, you need to be harsh to be kind, to make sure that someone learns something that they need to. That doesn't make it feel any better, though. And there's no reason to make it go on any longer than it has to.
Slowly, I get to my feet, and quietly move to stand over Malla's prone, sobbing body. I bend over a little bit. "You missed," I say.
Malla gasps and sits bolt upright, staring at me in shock. Fiery tears stream down her face. I stare back at her, silently. Malla stares at me, gaping in incomprehension. Slowly, understanding spreads across her face, and she closes her mouth, lowering her head in shame. "...Oh," she says quietly.
"It didn't feel good, did it?" I ask her. Malla shakes her head. "It felt terrible, thinking you'd lost someone, didn't it?" Malla nods. "Do you understand now, why you can't go around burning things? Why what you're doing is wrong?"
Malla nods quietly. "Have I been a bad girl?" she asks.
I nod solemnly. "Yes, You have been. But you know that now, so you can be a better girl from now on. Don't forget what happened today, Malla. But don't let it burden you, either. Learn from it, and move on." I smile gently. "There are people who have done worse than what you have, and they've made amends. Now, give me that robe back, all right?"
Silently, Malla hands me back my hat, which I dust off and place back upon my head. Next, the fairy carefully pulls off her red robe, folding it up and handing it to me. Now separated from her source of magic, Malla looks up at me sadly as her body begins to disintegrate around her.
"I'm sorry," she says with a voice full of sorrow, and then is no more.
I take a deep breath. Good thing the little girl's a fairy. I give it about thirty minutes until she respawns back at the mansion. However, she's likely to be very distraught from all that has happened. I should really be there to talk to her.
A rustling makes me turn around, and I see Reisen walking towards me. "How are they?" I ask, handing her the robe of the fire-rat.
Reisen takes the robe gingerly. "They'll be okay," she assures me, "They're already regenerating, and they've honestly been through worse. They aren't even mad, really, just a little surprised at what happened. Where's the fairy?"
"She'll probably respawn back at the mansion," I reply, "And I should probably be there." An idea occurs to me: would it be a good idea for Malla to see Mokou and Kaguya, to see that they're all right and not angry? Flandre could also help her through it; she's been there after all. Or maybe Malla needs her sister fairies right now. Maybe all of the above. I wonder...
[ ] Talk to Malla alone.
[ ] Bring someone along:
-[ ] Mokou and Kaguya.
-[ ] Flandre.
-[ ] Fairies
-[ ] Write-in.
(Multiple selections are acceptable if people are coming with Meiling.)
⋮ No. 58158 [X] Bring someone along:
-[X] Mokou and Kaguya.
-[X] Flandre.
I'm fairly certain Flan would be sober for a subject this serious, guys. Don't see any reason to include the add-on.
Although it probably would make for a funny "What If" scenario. And my earlier point from
>>58129 still stands, about Malla going and making friends for somewhat misguided, if genuine, motives. Maybe now that she has a sense of mortality, she'll be able to start on the right foot.
And yeah, I know that sounds weird when applied to the immortals, but hey. Who could stay mad at such a sweet fairy for very long?
⋮ No. 58162 >>58152 [X] Talk to her with a posse
-[X] Kaguya and both Scarlet Younger Sisters.
If anyone knows crazy, it's those three.
⋮ No. 58164 
It takes me just a moment to collect Mokou and Kaguya. They're a little baffled by what's going on, but I explain what's happening en route to the mansion. Surprisingly, they aren't terribly upset about what happened. Mokou has apparently done some things in her own past that she isn't too proud of, and Kaguya simply seems sympathetic to the poor little fairy. I'm grateful for their attitudes; the last thing Malla needs right now is people judging her for her actions.
The sun is rising as we approach the mansion. As we near the gates, I notice Sakuya standing out front, watching for me. I wave and land, noticing Sakuya's troubled expression.
"Welcome to the Scarlet Devil Mansion," she says, nodding to Mokou and Kaguya, then turns to me. "Meiling, what's wrong with Malla? She just rematerialized out by her fire pit, and she won't speak to anyone. She's just huddled up in a ball, and nothing the other fairies can do will snap her out of it. It isn't normal."
I sigh. "I'll explain later. But for right now, can you get Flandre, please? We could really use her help." Sakuya looks confused but nods, disappearing as she stops time for herself. I lead the two immortals into the gardens as we wait for Malla. Surprisingly, they're not tearing into each other.
"You two are being pretty civil towards each other," I note.
Mokou shrugs. "Eh, we've gotten our fill of pain for tonight. There's always tomorrow."
"Besides which, I feel responsible for the poor fairy's condition," Kaguya adds, "I was the one who filled her head with stories about the power of the fire-rat's robe... so I was at least partially the cause of all of this." It looks like both Mokou and Kaguya want to make a crack at each other, but are holding themselves back. Thanks, you too.
Shortly, Sakuya comes back with Flandre, and I take the time to explain the situation to them. Sakuya winces and glances over at Flandre, who nods solemnly. She understands very well what Malla's going through.
Explanations given, I lead the way to Malla's fire pit. There's about a dozen fairy maids there surrounding the pit itself. Sitting by the pit, huddled up in a ball, is Malla. Her clothing looks rumpled, and he face is pressed into her knees. She's absolutely still and silent, not responding to anything the other fairies say or do, not even the occasional hug and whispered word of concern. The fairies see us coming and back away, turning pleading gazes towards myself, Sakuya, and Flandre. Their sister has a wounded heart and they don't know what to do about it; it's up to the keepers of the mansion to help.
I walk towards the silent forest-fire fairy. "Malla?" I prod. No response.
Mokou walks forward, mulling over what to say. "...Hey, kiddo," she finally says, "You okay?" Kaguya just rolls her eyes.
Malla raises her head fractionally. "...You're not hurt?"
Mokou shakes her head, grinning. "Nah, I'm an immortal! Death ain't nothing to me! It just stung a little bit. Believe me, I've had a lot worse! Did I ever tell you about the time I fell into a volcano? Now THAT was painful. This was nothin'!"
"...I set you on fire," Malla says quietly. "You would have burned forever. It wasn't nothing."
Kaguya steps forward quickly. "Malla, it wasn't your fault. You tapped the power of an artifact that was far beyond what you were capable of handling. It drove you mad. Now you're all better. We can hardly blame you for what you did while not in your right mind! We forgive you, and you've learned from this, so please cheer up!" She favors Malla with a warm smile, but the fairy can't see it, hunched up as she is.
"Malla," I say, "think of all of the things that have happened in Gensokyo. The Mistress blocking out the sun, people messing with the moon or the seasons, Miss Reiuji trying to ignite Gensokyo herself; those were all frightening things, yes, but those people were forgiven for what they did! We all got over it! There's no reason for you to be any different. Now please, look at us, okay?"
Malla still doesn't move. She seems to be hesitating. I share a glance with Sakuya, trying to figure out what to try next, when Flandre steps forward and sits down next to Malla. The vampire stares at the empty fire pit for a long moment.
"...I used to think everyone hated me," Flandre finally says. Malla looks up at this, startled, and I close my eyes. "After all, I was insane. Out of control. I couldn't be trusted. I had to be locked away because if I were let loose, I'd be a threat to everyone. I honestly thought people hated me." She looks over at Malla. "Imagine my surprise when I found out I was wrong."
Flandre reaches out and wraps an arm around Malla's shoulders. "I found out that my sister loved me. I found out that people in this mansion cared about me. People like Sakuya, and Meiling. I found out that you fairies kind of liked me. And I found out that people like Marisa liked me, and were willing to be my friends. That meant a lot to me. It made me want to change. It made me want to be better, so that I could repay them." Flandre grins. "And look at me now! Being a socialite, hosting huge board games, planning weddings, setting my friends up with cute little fairies..."
Malla giggles a little bit.
"...Yeah, THERE'S that smile!" Flandre nods approvingly. "So, yeah. This is how far a crazy vampire, who was a nutjob for centuries, has come. YOU are an adorable little fairy who needs to cut back on the marshmallows. You made ONE mistake, and did a lot less harm than most of the people who screw up around here. So, my advice: cheer up! You have a bunch of sisters and big sisters here who love you and are worried about you!" Flandre chuckles. "Besides, no-one cooks marshmallows as good as you do."
There's a murmur of agreement from the fairies at this.
Malla stares up at Flandre with teary eyes. "Miss Flandre..."
The younger Scarlet just pulls the fairy into a hug. "Sssh. That's enough, little one. Just try and behave from now on, okay?" Malla returns the hug tightly and nods, whimpering a little. Flandre runs her hand through the fairy's hair and smiles her approval. "Good. That's a good girl." Around the two of them, the fairy maids start to close in, touching Malla and offering words of comfort to her.
Me, I just look at Flandre in wonder. Just like that, it's all taken care of. She really has grown up, huh?
After a few minutes, Malla looks up shyly. "Um... does anyone want me to roast them some marshmallows?" she asks. "Uh, just a few, though!" she hastens to add. There's cheerful affirmative reply from everyone, including Kaguya and Mokou.
And that's how we wind up roasting marshmallows as the sun rises.
------------------------------------------------
Makai-style party next update. I was planning to make it a pool party. Any objections to this?
[ ] Pool party's fine.
[ ] No, do it like THIS! (Write-in)
⋮ No. 58166 >>58165 THIS!!!
[X] No, do it like THIS!
-[X] Pool party's fine. However...
--[X] Flandre added Battleship to her giant Risk Board Game.
---[X] Moonbitches on opposite teams
probably will bring out a little sibling rivalry, then they may actually get lost in the fun of it
⋮ No. 58167 >>58165 ...YES. I like your thinking. Quick, let's see how many different ways we can phrase a vote for that idea!
[x] Pool party's fine.
-[x] And Flandre figured out how to run a Giant Battleship Game in there.
⋮ No. 58172 Hm, I think I'll check the voting, see how thing are coming along-
>THE BEST WRITE-IN EVER. Oh god I am looking forward to writing this.
>>58171 Yeah, this is pretty much the last hurrah. So let's make it a good one, yeah?
⋮ No. 58190 
It's about two days after the defeat of the Watatsuki sisters, and Malla's episode. In the interim, the sisters had been busy preparing their formal apology with the help of the residents of Eientei. Meanwhile, Yukari had carefully moved copies of the photographic and video evidence to certain safehouses she wouldn't reveal. Not that we were going to automatically assume that the Lunarians would go back on their word, mind you. It was just a precaution.
This brings us to to today; a bright, cloudless, sunny day, where the concerned parties have gathered in one of the rooms of a mansion for the official apology from Yorihime and Toyohime. In attendance are all of the residents of the Scarlet Devil Mansion (including Reimu), the primary inhabitants of Eientei (Eirin, Kaguya, Reisen, and Tewi), and of course the Watatsukis themselves. Also in attendance is Yuuka, who is practically a member of the mansion at this point given how often she comes by, and Hatate, who is taking a recording of the proceedings along with a kappa film crew. Finally, Yukari is sitting in the room along with Ran and Chen.
Clearing their throats, the Watatsuki sisters stand up before the assembled crowd, casting concerned glances at the recording equipment. Glancing at one another, they sigh, and proceed with their speech.
"Greetings, people of Gensokyo," Toyohime says politely, "My name is Toyohime Watatsuki, and this is my sister, Yorihime Watatsuki." The purple-haired swordswoman bows formally. "We have come before you today to make a formal apology to Reimu and Remilia Hakurei-Scarlet for certain words and actions directed towards them. We would like to assert that these comments were completely unworthy of us. As a people who pride themselves on their purity and enlightenment, such behavior reflects poorly not only upon us, but upon our entire civilization as well."
Yorihime speaks up. "It has also been pointed out to us that prior visits to Gensokyo have been... tainted... by a a similar attitude. Thus, we extend our apologies to all others who may have been offended by our words and actions. As guests, we should have known better." The sisters bow formally.
As they straighten, Toyohime clears her throat and begins to speak again. "As I was saying, the comments made to Reimu and Remilia Hakurei-Scarlet were completely unacceptable on our part. Though these comments need not be repeated here, I can assure you that they were terrible indeed. Therefore, I would like to retract all of those comments. I apologize for them, and for any emotional harm they may have caused their victims."
"I, too, withdraw those hurtful words, and apologize both for them, and the effects they have had," Yorihime speaks, "I cannot imagine the depth of the emotional pain that they may have caused. It is my hope that both of the Ladies Scarlet can find it in themselves to forgive my sister and I for our ill-advised, terrible words. I would like instead to assert my admiration for the two of them, and how they have managed to find an intense purity of love in a most surprising circumstance." The sisters bow again, and Reimu and Remilia look satisfied.
Toyohime continues. "Aside from being very sorry, and truly regretful of our prior words and actions, my sister and I would like to assure the residents of Gensokyo that should we pay a visit to your lovely land in the future, we will be sure to be on our best behavior, and not cause offense as we have in the past. This we so swear."
"In addition," says Yorihime, "As a token of our apology, we would like Reimu and Remilia to accept a humble gift." The Lunarian removes a drape from an object to her side, and the whole room 'Ooooohs' at the sight of a lovely silver figurine streaked with crimson and white, in the form of Reimu and Remilia in their wedding dresses. The two are arm-in-arm in the figurine, and smiling happily. Reimu and Remilia themselves gape at the figurine, talking quietly amongst themselves. They nod in satisfaction.
Standing up, Reimu and Remilia make their way to the front of the room, opposite the Watatsukis. "We accept your apology," they say as one, and both groups bow to one another as the assembled guests applaud.
Following the Watatsukis' speech, a written version of the apology is brought out and signed by the Watatsukis, the Hakurei-Scarlets, and by Tewi and Eirin acting as neutral third parties. In the wake of the formal proceedings, Sakuya brings out some tea and cakes, and the assemled guests begin to mingle. Aside from Koakuma, Sakuya, and Flandre, that is, who disappear to finish setting up the party. Looking out one of the windows, I notice a long line of guests beginning to arrive at the mansion. No two ways about it, this is going to be huge.
And the Watatsukis have no idea what's coming their way.
The air in the room is a little bit... tense. The Watatsukis aren't really sure what to say now that their apology is complete, and no one else really knows what to say to the Watatsukis. Eirin murmured something that sounded approving to them, but she clearly doesn't know how to handle this situation either. Fortunately, the awkwardness in the room is dispelled when Koakuma walks in.
Smiling, the succubus speaks to the room as a whole. "May I have everyone's attention? Thank you. The post-assembly party is now ready to being. Please put on your outfits and make your way to the party area immediately!" There is a general rumble of anticipation from the people in the room, but the Watatsukis and Eientei crowd look a little lost. Not surprising; the details were deliberately kept secret from them.
Actually, I take that back. Tewi has a huge smirk on her face. Unsurprising, really; if anyone were to find out, it would be her. Fortunately, she seems to have kept everything under her hat.
"Ah, excuse me?!" Toyohime calls out, rushing over to Koakuma with her sister in tow. "Um, we weren't informed of any specific uniform we would be expected to wear."
Koakuma smiles, waving off her concerns. "Not to worry! This problem was expected, and outfits were prepared for you. Here they are!" Koakuma snaps her fingers, and a pair of smiling fairy maids bring the 'uniforms' in on a pair of racks.
Toyohime and Yorohime stare at the material of the outfits, colored purple and red respectively. Well, to be honest, they're probably more concerned about the ABSENCE of material.
"...What are those?" Yorihime asks faintly, pointing at the swimsuits with a trembling finger.
"They're called micro-bikinis," Koakuma says primly.
"WHAT?!" the Watatsukis shriek in unison.
"You can NOT expect us to wear those!" Toyohime sputters, face red as a beet. "That's so.. so..."
"Sexy?" Koakuma suggests.
"Indecent!" Yorihime chokes out.
Koakuma looks a little bit offended. "I beg your pardon! Are you really insulting the traditional wear of Makai diplomats?" The sisters freeze, remembering the terms of the agreement they just signed. Koakuma smiles, a predatory expression if there ever was one. "Ah, but maybe you're just unfamiliar with these outfits! Not to worry, we have an eager maid staff eager to help you into uniform, and to escort you to the pool!" Koakuma snaps her finger, and they come. A dozen fairy maids, all in identical, incredibly small bathing suits with maid headdresses. As one, the bikini-fairy maids pounce on the terrified Watatsuki sisters and drag them, protesting,out of the room, already pulling at their clothing.
"HELP US EIRIIIIINNN!!!" their screams echo down the hallway. The Lunarian doctor just gapes as the sisters are hauled off, turning a disbelieving gaze upon Koakuma.
As the other guests begin to file out of the room, snickering, Koakuma favors the doctor with a dazzling smile. "Of course, we have prepared appropriate suits for ALL of our guests! You may find them in the pool changing room. Please hurry, all right?" Turning on her heel, Koakuma marches smartly out of the room.
"Uh..." Eirin tries.
Kaguya doesn't even miss a beat. She simply strides out of the room, humming cheerfully to herself.
"Princess...?" Eiring asks, sounding desperate.
Tewi is hauling a nervous-looking Reisen along behind her. "C'mooon already!" she says to her lunar counterpart, "I wanna get to the pool already!" Reisen is too stunned to respond, instead silently following along behind the insistent smaller rabbit.
Eirin turns a desperate gaze upon me, and I just smile cheerfully. "Well, it's a Makai tradition!" I say happily, walking out of the room with Yuuka.
For all she knows, that is.
*********************************************
So, the indoor pool has been noticeably expanded, thanks to Sakuya messing around with space-time in the mansion. It's absolutely HUGE now, with plenty of room for the many, many guests at the mansion. Around the edges of the room, buffet tables have been set up with all manner of snacks (and signs reminding to people to wait before entering the pool). Deck chairs provide ample room to sit and relax, 'uniformed' fairy maids rush around to provide refreshments to the guests, hot tubs have been set up, and there's even some musical accompaniment in the form of Choujuu Gigaku and the Prismrivers teaming up again to play beach music.
The dress code is, of course, skimpy. Very skimpy. For both men and women.
Aside from inviting everyone she could think of in Gensokyo, Remilia also asked Byakuren to make sure that there were at least a few open-minded humans along as well, just to make the male to female ratio a bit more even. Unsurprisingly, the thought of going to an indoor pool with a bunch of attractive women in swimsuits was enough to bring the men in.
So, Mystia, Kyouko, and the Prismrivers are happily playing music in bathing suits, and everyone else is cheerfully walking around, mingling, lounging, snacking, and otherwise having a good time while showing off a lot of skin. Now, for the younger visitors like Cirno and Chen, the bathing suits provided were more conservative one-pieces. For everyone else?
Well, I'm certainly not ashamed of my body.
In the center of the festivities stand the Watatsukis, beet-red and mortified, trying desperately to conceal as much of their skin as possible. Which isn't succeeding all that well. Tewi keeps smirking at them, clearly planning to snap an elastic at some point.
Yorihime trembles with embarrassment. "Why are we dressed like this...?"
Toyohime looks hunted. "The fairies hid our clothes. We can't go out like this... what should we do?" Shaking her head, the lunar princess scans the crowd, looking for a familiar face. "Ah, there's Kaguya! Ah, Kaguya, we could use your- what are you doing?!"
I follow Toyohime's gaze and see Kaguya for myself. Who is grinning hugely as she lounges in a hot tub wearing sunglasses. One arm is wrapped around a giggling Tokiko. The other is wrapped around an awe-struck young man who I remember as having sold Sakuya and myself tickets at the concert in the village awhile back. Several other men and women are in the tub with her.
Kaguya peers at the other Lunarians over the top of her sunglasses. "Jealous much?" she asks, causing her entourage to laugh. The Watatsukis can only gape in disbelief.
Ladies and gentlemen: Kaguya Houraisen, pimping it up.
"You are way too tense," I hear a familiar voice say. Both Watatsukis squeak and jump a little, and I look over to see Koishi Komeiji squeezed between the two of them, smiling contentedly, a hand squeezing each of their butts.
Yorihime gapes at her in horror. "What are you DOING?!" she demands.
Koishi shrugs. "Your butts looked nice. I wondered what they felt like, that's all." Her eyes light up. "Oh, they brought out cookies at the buffet table! I wonder what they taste like?" Her interest having wandered, Koishi releases the Lunarian sisters and wanders away, probably having already forgotten about them.
The sisters stare at me, searching desperately for an explanation. I just shrug, smiling. "She's like that, that's all." They groan, not in the least bit satisfied with my explanation.
Flandre walks out at this point with a huge smile on her face. "Hey, everybody!" she calls out, "Who wants to play battleships?!" A few people call out in the affirmative, most notably Minamitsu Murasa. Flandre giggles happily. "Okay! Sakuya, bring out the battleships!"
I hear a clanking of machinery, and look up... to see hooks and joists lowering two miniature battleships, apparently built to scale, from the ceiling. Everyone else at the pool gapes in disbelief.
"What the hell?" I murmur.
Sakuya appears next to me. "Flandre's been working on it for a while," she tells me. "Even got some kappas to come in and help with the construction. When Koakuma started planning this party, well... Flandre insisted."
In the pool, a couple of kappa swim out to release the ships from their restraints. Flandre turns around with a broad smile. "Okay, I get to be captain of one ship! Who wants to be the other one?"
"ME!!!" Murasa shouts out, lunging forward eagerly. "ME! ME! ME! PICK ME, DAMMIT!"
"Okay, Captain Murasa gets the other ship!" Flandre laughs.
"FUCK YES THIS IS AWESOME!!!" Captain Murasa crows, diving into the water to swim out to her ship. Soon, both miniature battleships are fighting each other, with electrical motors pushing the ships around, and pumps feeding the cannons full of water. Along with the water-rifles assigned to the crew, blasts of water keep going bath and forth, drenching the crews and knocking people into the pool. Everyone is shrieking with laughter as Flandre and Murasa shout out orders, and the spectators to the side shout out encouragement to one boat or another.
Next to me, I notice Yorihime watching the spectacle intently, twitching slightly. Finally, she takes a deep breath, shakes her head, and dives into the water. "Yori?!" Toyohime cries out in surprise. Yorihime doesn't answer, instead swimming over to Flandre's ship, grabbing a foam-rubber 'sword' and pointing it at Murasa's vessel.
"She's trying to flank you!" the purple-haired Lunarian shouts to Flandre, "Pull hard to port, or you'll be wide open!"
"Dammit!" Murasa shouts, her gambit exposed.
"Ah, good call Yori!" Flandre nods excitedly. "You heard her, guys! Let's do this!" There are enthusiastic shouts in response as the game of Battleships intensifies with the aid of a lunar princess, who very quickly gets into the spirit of things.
Toyohime just slumps over, staring dully at her exuberant sibling. She sighs deeply, shrugging. "Oh well. When in Rome, and all that." Shaking her head, Toyohime walks over to hop into a hot-tub, getting into an animated conversation with a few youkai.
I nod in satisfaction, turning to Yuuka and Sakuya. "I think we win this one," I tell them. They laugh, and nod in agreement.
*********************************
A little while later, Yuuka, Sakuya and I are in a hot tub all to ourselves, enjoying how the bubbles massage our bodies. Yuuka has dozed off on my shoulder, while Sakuya clings to me, watching the party with fascination.
It's really gotten into full swing. Reimu and Remilia are playing together in the water, while Koakuma hasn't let go of Josef since they walked in together. Patchouli has a circle of male admirers, and Malla is roasting marshmallows for anyone who wants one. Off to one side, I can see Pameel clinging to Marisa, who doesn't seem to mind one bit. Mima is floating around in an especially small bathing suit, apparently hunting for interested men.
Out on the water, Flandre is laughing happily with Yorihime as they continue to duel with Captain Murasa. Okuu and Tenshi open fire with another gout of water from the cannons, causing Reisen and Shou to fire back in response. Choujuu Gigaku and the Prismrivers have stopped playing to frolic in the water for a little bit, and Cirno is leading her team in superhero poses. I see Albrecht and Yuugi hand-in-hand speaking to Mokou, while Satori is having an animated conversation with Iku, apparently trying to get the oarfish to dance to the music later.
Nitori and some kappa are running around, clearly having the time of their lives. I see Hatate and Momiji talking to some humans at the snack table, while Big Papa himself has put in an appearance, holding forth on the principles of looooooove to a fascinated audience of humans and youkai. Byakuren seems to be listening to him very carefully.
On the other side of the pool, I see Yukari stretched out alongside Shinki, while Ran is chatting quite companionably with Toyohime. I see Chen running over to Cirno and her crew. Kaguya is still pimping it up, and Tewi is leading Koishi somewhere, no doubt up to some mischief. Eirin has relaxed a little bit, and is having drinks with a certain group of Oni gentlemen. I even see Parsee on one of the boats, laughing and playing happily.
Yeah, I don't know if Makai actually throws parties like this, but hey SHOULD.
"Hey, Meiling?" Sakuya says to me.
"Yeah?" I reply.
"I love you. Just wanted you to know that." The maid smiles at me warmly.
Yuuka peeks up shyly. "Me too. I love you, that is."
I smile back at both of them, feeling warm and happy. "Me too. I love you both, more than words can say." They smile happily and curl up tighter against me in the hot-tub. I just smile and relax, considering all of the changes my life has gone through lately. All of them for the better.
Two women who love me in my arms. Surrounded by friends who may as well be family. Having the respect and friendship of so many people. Yep. I can honestly say that I love my job, and I love my life. It's good to be me,
Well, okay.
It's good Being Meiling.
------------------------------------------------
Meiling Hong happy ending achieved. Thank you for reading!
Being Meiling
The End.
⋮ No. 58201 >>58200 Not at the moment. I do have an idea for a story that I'm hashing out right now. But I want to take a couple of weeks to mull it over and plan, first.
I HAVE been toying with the idea of doing the occasional thing in /shorts/. Just something I can do for a couple of days, then leave for a month or so, and come back to when I have a bright idea.
Flandre and Big Papa's Matchmaking Service. Get them touhous some looooooovin'!
⋮ No. 58208 >>58207 I never even dreamed that romance would become part of the story, let alone a Sakuya/Yuuka end would become a thing. Honestly, I figured I'd wind up writing a thread or two and calling it quits.
Anyway, Yuuka became a love interest because Anon voted for her to visit the mansion instead of Yukari (I had similar jokes planned for the two of them, so when Yuuka won, I just scrapped the Yukari idea). At first, it was just meant to be a cute little crush, but things escalated. Same with Sakuya.
When I first started writing Albrecht, I had considered him as a possible match for Meiling, but the character didn't catch on, so I scrapped that idea. And Yuuka and Sakuya had started to grow on me, so... you know the rest.
Basically, I was adapting the story as new plotlines and arcs occurred to me. This is the result.
⋮ No. 58216 >>58212 Deliberately vague. I'm not knowledgeable enough about martial arts to give good descriptions of them, or compare and contrast different techniques. My assumption, though, is that Meiling has spent centuries mastering every form and style she could, and blending them into her own personal style, shifting to different techniques to suit the circumstance.
>>58213 It's magic. No one really understands how she does it.
>>58214 This was never gonna be a Bad End story. I specifically wanted to do something a little light-hearted. Different decisions would have just made a different flavor to things.
>>58215 Hey, thanks! I'd like to thank everyone for reading and voting!
So, can I get people to do something for me? It's going to be a while before I start my next story, but I want to do some planning for it. Can people suggest, say, 6-8 touhous that they'd like me to write about? Preferably ones that haven't gotten a lot of attention on THP.
Like, say, Parsee. How much love has Parsee gotten lately? Or Momiji, or Suika. Hina doesn't have a whole lot on her, either. Just call post a list of touhous that you think you'd like for me to write. That'll help me make plans for my story.
And keep the questions coming, if you have any.
⋮ No. 58217 >>58216 1. PC-98 characters
2. Rinnosuke
3. Akyuu
4. Shikieiki
5. Hatate
6. Renko
7. Kasen
8. Reisen II
Here you go. I'll be waiting warmly for your next story~
How do you update daily? You're the first writer I've seen on this site who churns out updates like this, and it's a bit uncanny. How do you get the time for this stuff?
⋮ No. 58218 >>58216 Well.... the whole casts of UFO and TD as stories centering on those characters are still very rare.
/eientei/:
Anyone not Kaguya or Eirin, but especially Mokou.
/forest/:
Mystia, Wriggle (Though she has a story going on right now)
/border/:
Prismrivers, Komachi, Shiki Eiki, Youmu, Ran
/shrine/
Reimu, Suika, Akyuu, Mima or the whole board in general.
/sdm/
I would say the only sdm character you haven't really covered would be Koakuma, but you showed her progression of things pretty decently for a side character. Tricky thing as this is the most popular non-th board; characters may get attention but various stories don't commonly last.
/youkai/
At the way things are going, just about all the MoF cast, Iku, and Tenshi. ESPECIALLY the akis (while they got a story, the writer basically quit that)
/underground/
Parsee, Yamame, Kisume, Orin, Okuu, Koishi. YAF gives Satori plenty of attention.
⋮ No. 58222 >>58216 1. Kasen
2. Shikieiki
3. Koishi
4. Yuugi
5. Reisen
6. Tewi
7. Rumia
I would say that these are the ones who get too few love around here. Especially Shiki and Kasen.
⋮ No. 58223 
>Can people suggest, say, 6-8 touhous that they'd like me to write about? Preferably ones that haven't gotten a lot of attention on THP.
Done and done.
1. Kasen
2. Parsee
3. Suika
4. Letty
5. The Aki sisters
6. Kyouko
7. Komachi
8. Koishi
9. Notori
10. Any of the newbies from DDC, especially Sekibanki.
>Koishi fondling the Moonbitches' asses and getting distracted by cookie buffet.
Thank you, from the bottom of my Koishi-loving heart. ;_;
Wow, what a wonderful story, and I feel honored to have gotten to vote on the last couple of threads. Wish I could've been around earlier, but I'll take what I can. Thank you, dear writefriend. You have managed to do something so many here only wish they could do.
And as for questions, well. I've had questions in mind for asking, but I decided to take a day for them to all pool together so I wouldn't forget any particular one (which means I'll still probably forget one or two). So, warning in advance: this is going to be a pretty long list. If you aren't feeling up to answering some of the questions, I won't hold it against you.
Now then, let's get started...
When did you first hear about THP, and roughly how long did you lurk on the site before writing something?
How long since the writing contest have you had the idea of doing a Meiling-centric CYOA?
Were there any particular sections of the story you enjoyed writing the most? What about the least?
Are there any ideas you had for the story that had to be cut either for time constraints, or simply because Anon didn't appear to pursuit them?
Can you give a list of some of the larger diversions that could have occurred story-wise, if Anon had chosen to vote differently for some reason (examples off the top of my head being 'having Cirno prank the fuck out of Marisa rather than becoming a superhero' and 'doing the order of events differently in post-Apocalypse underground')? Hooray for Alternate Universes and all that.
Could you give us a few of your inspirations/influences for getting into writing? Any Touhou-centric writers in particular?
Would you ever like to see a comic/manga adaption of Being Meiling made, and if so who would you pick to illustrate?
Besides Meiling, can you name some of your other favorite characters (Basically, asking for a Top Ten or Fifteen here.)?
How did you come up with the names of your OCs? Because they strike me as being of slightly Germanic origin (Albrecht, Yosef, Pameel et al.).
On that note, are YOU German? Or at least European? Your update schedule has suggested to me for a while that you update in the evening whenever it's early afternoon where I live. Also the use of some British terms ('blackjack' in place of 'nightstick'). (This question has been spoilered for potentially being too personal to ask, or prying too closely into personal life of someone. Don't have to answer it if you aren't comfortable with it.)
Who or what are some of the authors/stories you follow(ed) to a tee on THP?
What about MOTK? (Spoilered for potential flamewar ignitor.)
Are you ever going to revisit any of the things you've written about here in your future stories; maybe in a one-shot or creating a Verse of some kind?
Finally, to end things on a more technical level, can you give some incite as to how you plot out a CYOA story? Because seriously: an update every day since March? You have some God-given balls, Keymaster.
----------------------
And that's all I got at the moment. If, in the course of you deciding to answering these questions brings up more questions from me, I'll be sure to let them fly.
⋮ No. 58229 >>58227 Stop being a dick, okay? Maybe he didn't know.
(at least for the sage)
>>58226 Sage goes in the email field, friend.
I would also suggest that you make sure all your posts have correct grammar and punctuation. You WILL be called on it otherwise.
⋮ No. 58230 >>58223 Righto, let's get to answering these in order!
-I first heard about THP about a year and a half ago... maybe going on two years. It was Demetrious' 'A Wizard is You' that lured me here in the first place. I figure I lurked here about a year or so before writing the original short stories.
-After the Christmas writing contest, a couple of people commented in that thread that they would be interested in seeing a CYOA based on my version of the SDM. So I thought about it for a while. Back in February, THP had gotten really slow, and I was toying with the idea of writing something, just to have some new content on the board. Clear Your Sights started writing his CYOA, and I figured Why Not? So I started writing.
-I had a lot of fun writing the wedding, and the underground adventure, which I always saw as The Hangover: Gensokyo edition. There wasn't anything I didn't enjoy writing, really, although there were times if I wondered whether what I was writing was up to snuff. But I just shrugged it off and plowed through.
-I mostly did what I intended to write. Actually, this story has gone on a lot longer than I intended because I kept getting ideas! The only thing Anon missed was Yukari potentially developing a crush on Meiling instead of Yuuka, back in thread 1. But people voted for Yuuka, and things developed as they did. Frankly, I'm fine with that.
-It's... really hard to say how the story would have diverged. A lot of what I did was episodic, and each episode had an effect on what came later. There have been so many episodes, that I just don't know how I would have written things differently had they been done in a different order.
-Oh god, I've read a lot of different stories on the site, some of which have concluded, some of which are now dead. AWiY was what brought me here, of course. SDMLA is still one of my favorites, and I will always mourn what happened to GH (though I read it LONG after it stalled out, which may be for the better). I just love reading, so it's hard to say who all of my influences are. It's just a Keymaster Stew in my head, with a little bit of everything.
-I would probably insta-orgasm if someone offered to make an illustrated version of this story. As to the artist... dunno. As long as they did the characters and scenes justice, I'd be open to it. I mean, just having ANYONE offer to draw my writing would be unbelievable.
-I like a lot of characters. Meiling is tops, of course, but I also like Momiji, Okuu, Tenshi, Flandre, Yamame... basically, there's a lot of characters that can be tons of fun when written well.
-I just came up with the names off the top of my head. I'm not German, but I understand I have some German in my ancestry, so... maybe I just like the way they sound?
-I guess I mentioned some of the stories I followed a few lines up. I'm still following AWiY, and I really enjoyed Favors Owed. MonTouHou Mon adventure is proving to be insanely fun to read, and I have High Hopes for that new story on /shrine/ by barkeep. I'm reading Kiss Me, and a few stoies on /others/... did I mention that I'm an avid reader?
-MOTK? Don't get the acronym.
-I've been toying with following up with a few side-stories. For instance, Big Papa and Flandre, as I mentioned in an earlier post, maybe do something with DyCirno (though I think she might have run her course)... basically, if I get an idea, I'm not opposed to doing a one-shot based on it. And yeah, I'll probably keep the same 'verse.
-As to my organizational strategy: easily-digestible episodes. I just write what I feel I can in a day, and don't try to push myself too hard. After all: this is supposed to be for fun. There's no point in making it a source of stress.
>>58224 I have a few ideas, but nothing I'm going to share just yet. Probably just be something light and silly I can do for a thread or two, though. I wanna get my ideas in order.
I wrote the story light and fluffy because that's just what I felt like writing. Something peaceful that could make people relax and laugh after a long day. I feel like I might have accomplished that.
As for 'routes' I never really intended romance to be a big thing here. It just kinda... happened. But yeah, there was a chance for Yukari to crush on Meiling, and I toyed with Flan crushing on her as well, but ultimately decided against it.
⋮ No. 58233 >>58216 Well, at least it is nice to know that you managed to write this story without problems while not having a plan. Though, I suspect you just get a funny idea and throw it in in the next update as an option. Just make a general plan that your story follows if you decide to write a more serious story. Some writers have said that they drop stories since they don't know what to write/do next.
As for some characters that don't get love based on my experience...
1. Mima + PC98-characters (Rarely appears and is usually a side character that gets few scenes in updates)
2. Koakuma (Side character usually)
3. Watatsuki sisters (Ditto with above two else + some people hate them immensely)
4. Rumia
After the whole GH fiasco (or was it Flandre, can't remember
anymore on which character caused the shitstorms) DON'T fill this thread with GH discussion, ok? 5. Komachi and Shikieiki (Only time I have seen them appear with more than one scene is in Hakugyokuro LA)
6. Maybe suprisingly Reimu? Apart from YAF's stories she never gets to be one of the main characters excluding DEFT and in the stories that actually has her having a major role are dead or very slowly updating (Chronograph and Ace Combat)
7. Mokou and mayyybe Reisen due to FO (In both cases being overshadowed by Eirin and Kaguya. Reisen getting no love is so infamous that it is almost a meme [Last year's board had a "First story to complete Reisen route gets a gift!" title because of Rabbit year] resulting in people pushing for "Reisen route" and railroading. Favors Owed was pretty good and interesting story but somewhat depressing seeing Reisen kill people against her will)
8. UFO and TD casts
If you disagree with my list then please explain. I haven't read all the stories on THP so I don't know fully about which character needs love.
⋮ No. 58241 1. Byakuren. Specifically, her doing wizard things (researching spells, using spells, searching for weird things to craft into magic items, etc.). I've seen the other magicians do wizard things, I've seen Reimu do wizard things a couple of times (Shinto theurgy, but still...), I've even seen Cirno do wizard things once! However, I haven't seen Byakuren do anything but be The Heart. She can turn a shipwreck into an airship and spent a thousand years LARPing Minecraft, I wanna see what else she can do.
2. Satori. She's supposed to be a fiction writer, right? I wanna see her do writer things; researching material for stories, dealing with publishers, signing books, spending her money, dealing with becoming famous, and so forth. On a more personal level, what would happen were Satori and Byakuren to discuss Koishi? And speaking of the satori race, where are they now?
3. Kanako, though not in the sense of a Moriya Shrine Conspiracy (templates like that are forbidden). She wants to become a goddess of technological innovation, so lets see a story focusing on that. How would she do that? The kappa come up with ideas on their own (and are terrible at large projects), the humans are pre-industrial, and Eientei's potential competition.
4. On a related note is Youkai Mountain, the closest Gensokyo has to a modern nation. What do tengu besides Aya and Momiji do? What do kappa besides Nitori do? What technology do they have? Besides conventional high-tech (and ultra-tech), I can see Gensokyo hosting devices of conspiracy theory legend (like broadcast energy and ELF rays) or tech that has become obscure due to non-use (like OTEC and Magnus effect airships). A pity Gensokyo doesn't have an ocean, I really wanna see an OTEC city.
5. Besides glimpses from the manga, we don't know much about the Human Village. What's its population? Where do they get metal from? How do they feel about technology, especially given the presence of Moriya and Eientei? How do they feel about magic, especially given the magician who lives there? Are there other magicians besides those we've seen in the games?
6. Yamame. No particular reason beyond my fondness for spiders, they're just so cute! She has a few interesting parts in Patchy Quest (update, Kahi!) but that's it.
7. Miko and Tojiko being a married couple. After all, they are based on people who were married to each other. Also, I've read that Taoists are totally into having sex in all kinds of positions…
8. Kokoro. She's new, so now's your opportunity to make some fanon! Never mind that you probably did that for a character who's been around for just over a decade.
⋮ No. 58243 1) Mima, as mentioned, she's rarely ever a main character of anything, despite being Playable Command! She needs more love.
2) Shinki (or Yumeko), because again, these two need more love. Shinki has a whole realm to run! Yumeko is her long-suffering maid! The madness that is Makai would be fun for all ages!
3) Chojuu Gigaku, because honestly. Punk Rock in Gensokyo is the best idea.
4) Maribel and Renko. They're adorable, and have a very neat perspective on things, looking in on fantasy from the outside. They may also occasionally travel through space, so that's fun.
5) Mokou. Just, Mokou. Mokou has such an interesting backstory, and interacts with a bunch of really cool character fairly regularly. I'm surprised she doesn't get more love. From Kaguya.
6) Shikieiki: Even as a set of short vignettes, Shikieiki's Judging Hour would be a pretty neat set of stories. They might be one-offs, but still.
7) Momiji (and the Tengu Squad!) For similar reasons as Meiling. Momiji needs more love.
8) Mannosuke
⋮ No. 58247 >>58246 Was I the only one expecting the main character to be named Albrecht in that story?
The timing of its appearance, just when Being Meiling was coming to an end, was too perfect.
But it's pretty cool from what I've seen.
⋮ No. 58285 warning: massive text dump
Alright, first things first. I'm borderline depressed because I discovered it just as it ended. I really liked the way the story went, but having a personal stake in it would have been glorious, and I had a few ideas that never got voiced during votes.
Second, this is one of the best fanfics I've ever read in this style, although I'm far from an expert on the subject; You cast Meiling favorably which isn't always easy, as well as all the characters, gave them fully-fledged personalities (besides Aya; she was just crazy lady which saddened me due to lack of closure), and wrapped up a very complex and interesting group of plotlines in a neat little bow, from the mecha plot, to the romance subplot, even to a little cat and mouse hunting at the wedding. If I could get this as an actual novel, cutting out the votes and other posts, I would pay actual money for it, although I might question the strange things meiling came up with as well as her sanity at points.
Another thing I like about your story is that gives so many people a rounded-out and unique character that I've adopted some of them as my personal headcanon in some regards. Although I don't think about Meiling's sexual preferences much, this is exactly how I would see her thoughts and actions to play out, for example.
Most amazing of all, you never faltered or lost any quality over time. some people start an amazing plot but then it just peters out, either from lack of ideas or lack of time to write. You, however, not only gave us episodes in a timely manner, but the quality and tone of each was relatively consistent throughout, a hard thing to accomplish for a non-professional writer considering the length of this story.
Long story short, this was great, and I adore you for making such a high quality story.
⋮ No. 58381 >>58372 That's good advice, thanks. I tend to forget what I'm writing for sometimes and end up writing for the sake of writing. I might try that if I ever get back to updating a certain other fairy fanfic.
>>58380 The beauty of Touhou is in the variety of character interpretations. ZUN left just enough canon to allow plenty of freedom in fan interpretation. Objectively speaking, I feel the best writers are those who are able to expand on their interpretation in the most creative manner possible while still honouring canon. In this case I think KeyMaster achieved this quite well.
While I too don't quite like the DyCirno segments quite as much as everything else, from a purely objective point of view, it's still one of the most creative portrayals of Cirno (without going out of character) I've seen. Despite my misgivings Cirno defeating Yukari in a believably Cirno way was one of scenes I enjoyed the most, surprisingly.
