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You are Patchouli Knowledge. You are a physically frail and sickly, but exceptionally magically powerful Magician, and live in the Voile Archives of the Scarlet Devil Mansion. You are not in the habit of leaving the first, and very seldom leave the second at all, though you have done so more frequently of late than usual for you. You are Friends with the owner of the mansion, against whom your Sun and Water magics are particularly effective, and who doesn't really want to drink your blood anyway. Your Magical Potency is somewhat variable, depending on your current degree of health.

Your magic is based on Elementalism primarily, focusing on the elements of Wood, Fire, Metal, Water, and Earth, which are fairly self-explanatory, as well as Sun and Moon, which are rather less simple elements. Simplified as much as possible, you would say that Sun is like Fire, only significantly more so, as well as having unique properties of its own that simple Fire cannot duplicate. Moon is similarly related to Water, only in a rather different sense. In some respects, the two elements could equally well be termed 'Light' and 'Shadow', though this does not hold true for all scenarios. You tend not to bother with other elements or elemental systems, though they are not unknown to you.

You have significant prowess in Diabolism, and in point of fact have summoned and bound a succubus, Koakuma, to assist you in tasks where you have determined the mansion's Maid Squad made up almost entirely of Fairies to be, in general, insufficient. You are not unfamiliar with other forms of Summonings, however while Diabolic forces tend to be more temperamental, and require a firm hand to keep in line, they also tend to be much better at their jobs when pushed properly.

In most other magical respects, you are not quite as polished, but either have acceptable ability, or can study up to an acceptable level with reasonable speed, using your vast assortment of Tomes of Magical Information.


It is day: X

Your health level is 96/100:
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Whatindawhyindasrsly..... Stupid necro.

Glad to see you back, Kahi.
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You are Patchouli Knowledge, a physically frail and sickly magician of profound aptitude and power. You live in the Voile Archives of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, though you have constructed a tower elsewhere, without internal fixtures as yet, which you may or may not inhabit much. You are Friends with Remilia, the vampire who owns the mansion, who considers it entirely too much effort to try to feed off you. Your Magical Potency varies somewhat from day to day, depending on how long of an incantation you can manage before breaking off into a fit of coughs, and how much strain your body can handle in addition to the rigors of illness. You currently have a box of ninety five vials of Medication stored in the library to offset the worst of the days, however, though it will later exact a toll, and your new Magical Focus eases use of magic to a significant degree. It seems that Luck can play a reasonable part in keeping yourself healthy, though effects may vary, as can the Hakurei Hot Spring.

Your magic is based on Elementalism primarily, though you are also skilled in Diabolism and Other Summonings, which can be surprisingly versatile, particularly in combination with Golems. You can also create Homunculi, if you have the materials to hand. You do not have any suitable samples of the key ingredient, however.

You have currently returned from a brief sojourn outside to witness the final death throes of a minor magical catastrophe. Sakuya will no doubt be incensed when she discovers the state of the carpets.

Rumia, who has been following you like a lost puppy for a bit, has re-appeared nearby less one hand, having undertaken some level of physical battle, and wearing a smug and self-satisfied toothy grin, displaying subtle traces of pink blood.


[ ] What do you do?
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[X] option C, for many resaons already mentioned =|
Thread the New:

Wonder if we'll get a Koa corner...

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Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result since August 2010.

Disguise your lack of artistic talent with creative use of Photoshop.

Asking why Gensokyo works is like asking how a cartoon character can run on thin air.

Hipsters are too mainstream now.

I used to write daily updates. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

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Sorry, it’s just… Like, she lost you way a long time ago. This must be what it’s like for Fransesca to listen to Flandre. What the hell was any of the about? Koishi smiles and shrugs, telling you it’s about the awful secret of the universe, but if she told you she’d have to—wait, she’s not supposed to kill people. Killing people is bad. She’d have to do… something, to you.

Okay, she lost you again. Koishi, look. Drink. See, see this drink, in your hand here? That drink’s also in your brain. Brain not worky goody. Use smaller words. Koishi says she “Wouldn’t mind a spot on the logo; all you’d have to do is say yes.” The what now? The heck is the logo?! You thought Koishi had reformed and was less manipulative now; what are these nefarious code words? She says it would actually make her really happy, Sunny; all she wants is for people to notice her more…

Is she… Is she crying? Those are, is that, but she can’t, how come, what but, could she… really? That’s… it’s, it’s so… so… It’s just too…

You ask Koishi if she’d like a hug. Yes, yes… She’d like a hug right now, she thinks.
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She smells like sake; it smells really bad, actually. You smell really bad too. But it’s okay, Koishi. It doesn’t matter if you smell bad. You, you don’t have to be alone. Such a cute little girl like you with your cute little hat, and your beautiful wavy hair… You can have any logo you want, Koishi. It’s my birthday today, but all I want today is for people to be happy and positive. Don’t you worry your little heart, kid; the sun’ll come out tomorrow~

…provided she isn’t hung over then.




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I could vote more if people would stop making such awesome votes before me.

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I don't see this story lasting longer than a single thread, but sometimes shorter stories are fun too. Enjoy, folks!

The first thing you realize when you come to is that you're so heavily tied up you can't move anything but your head. The full-body armor and helmet you're wearing prevents the binds from chafing, but they're still uncomfortably tight. Your helmet covers your entire face, and the tinted visor shields your eyes from any glare or sudden flashes of light.

Looking around reveals that you're tied up on the floor of a throne room, given the ostentatious decorations surrounding you. Frescoes decorate the walls and stained glass windows let sunlight shine in, the artwork depicted upon them showing scenes from classical mythology. There's also the eponymous throne that gives the room its name, of course, and its occupant looks almost too pleased to see you trying to break loose from your bonds.

"I wouldn't bother, if I were you." Remilia Scarlet, Lady of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, cheerfully states. The vampire's jolly expression promises ill omens for your future, given your briefing on her.

"Why not?" You grunt out, still trying to free yourself. She snickers at your ongoing struggle.

"Well, those ropes are magically reinforced. You're not getting out of those unless I want you to."

"That seems to be the case." You wryly admit after a few more seconds of futile effort.

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[X] You're ready to tear something apart, and there's plenty to crush in this very room.
-[X] Help Meiling with the smashing of robots while flirting with her.
Called in unanimous favor of showing these metal bastards your fists of fury. And also Meiling.

Since we've hit autosage (holy wow I did not expect that) I'll link to the next thread in here when I get the update out.


The answer is definitely maybe


I'll look down on accidental namefagging when I can go through ten threads in the time it takes me to go through one.

Ha. Ha ha. Ha.

damn it i am so slow
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Check out the new bugs features!

Previous version: >>50389


[x] "I love her, even though I haven't known her for long."
-[x] "It's a sad thing indeed to be alone. And I want to be here for her."

“I know what it feels like to be alone. No-one deserves that.” Remilia draws breath as if she wants to say something, but remains silent as you pause for a short while to decide how to say the next bit. You're... not comfortable with saying it. “Also, I think... I've fallen in love. With her.” A slight, or not-so-slight, blush creeps onto your cheeks. “Don't ask me why. I'm not completely sure.”
The last bit is blurted out as you attempt to salvage the situation.

“I see.” Remilia smiles gently. She... isn't angry? “It seems like I'll have to settle with with what I have.” A small hand lands on your back after a short silence. “You seemed tired. Feel free to sleep.”
Her hand breaks contact with you. She rummages around the bed a little, presumably to find a good place to sleep in.

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Well, it's been a hell of a ride. Good on you for joining the very few who have completed a story on THP. Thankfully we avoided a rape end, but it's a shame we couldn't resolve things with Mima in time.

Too used to being spoon-fed exposition, I see.
Not the same guy as >>58421 but there are too many unanswered questions and the ending is just to abrupt. It's rushed and unpolished and is leaving me with a bad taste in my mouth.

LandScout, if you could just answer the following questions it would be greatly appreciated.

-Why is Mima in Chris's body?
-Was there more to Chris being Flandre's Fiance than we were told, and if so explain.

This are just the two I care most about. Also, not saging because I want answers.
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I know.
1) I ran out of plot.
2) Exactly one person cared about anything else than banging touhoes.
3) Dues to 2, the story was going nowhere.

>Why is Mima in Chris's body?
Because someone put her there. Duh.

>Was there more to Chris being Flandre's fiancé than we were told, and if so explain.
Chris was chosen because he was the person with the most physical resemblance to the one Flandre dreamed of. It was also made sure that his personality is suitable, that he is healthy and that he would not leave a widow.

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Post #123

“So… that’s it, Miss Remilia?” I asked, putting down the hair brush and sliding a little to the side. “You’re just gonna, give up? Because you couldn’t find it all that long ago?”

“I will not hear this from you as well as her, Francesca,” she answered back in a huff. “This is not a situation you need to worry about; you may continue with my hair.”

“I’m done with your hair already. And, not to speak out of turn, but… I do need to worry about it! I mean, this is my life, isn’t it? I think maybe I should, you know, be allow to say something about it.”

She huffed childishly again, still not giving me the courtesy of eye contact. “No one has ever said you were not allowed to speak. I think only that it would behoove you not to speak here.”

Well that was a disguised slap in the face and a hearty “shut up” if ever I’d heard one. And if she could be stubborn, so could I. “Yes, well, I forgot what the word behoove means, Miss Remilia, so I’m going to talk anyways. Why don’t you want Sakuya to go look for Naganoto, or wherever?”

Sakuya seemed to have either grown tired of standing, or realized that all impact of her declaring victory at the foot of the bed had failed. In either case she sat down and slid a little closer to the two of us. It’d have been a nice little family gathering if not for the dour subject matter.

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I think Sakuya going against her mistress in the most selfless way possible is good enough.

And we got Flandre's downright epic "I know where you live" moment too. That whole scene in the cave was full of win.
I know you bumped the thread. I can smell it.
You can't delete your shame.
It was a spambot.

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Something happens in this update. I wonder how people will react to it?

Thread 1: >>/sdm/54956
Thread 2: >>/sdm/55386
Thread 3: >>/sdm/55803
Thread 4: >>/sdm/56153
Thread 5: >>/sdm/56497
Thread 6: >>/sdm/56844
Thread 7: >>/sdm/57149
Thread 8: >>/sdm/57460


The music starts out loud and aggressive, getting the attention of everyone in the audience. It's like a force, a blast of sound so powerful, yet so controlled, that you can't help but pay heed to it. However, after this initial blast, as though its point has been made, the music settles down into an energetic, rhythmic beat. It's loud, but not oppressive. It flows well, brings up your spirits, and overall is just plain fun. I'm pretty sure that this is the results of the collaboration between the two sets of musicians. Whatever you want to call it, it's working!
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[X] Polite, if they start getting high and mighty begin leafing through a stack of the pictures while smiling, commenting on how good they look in the photos etc.

-[X] A formal apology explaining how no one is perfect, especially themselves and they hope Reimu and Remilia will forgive them because everyone makes mistakes.
-[X] Formal apology written out, signed by all parties involved and witnessed/signed by a neutral third party, such as Eirin.
-[X] Give the Watatsukis a framed copy of the apology before they leave. The framed copy has one or two of the pictures hidden in it between the apology letter and the back frame.

Wasn't gonna vote this round. Didn't see any options I liked. This is marginally okay.

Not voting on smexy after party, though. Don't really want it personally, but looks like the will of the tribe can't be turned. Just make sure it's tasteful, please.
Calling votes!

First off, the Watatsukis will be giving a formal, recorded apology to the newlyweds, alongside a promise to behave themselves in the future. They will be on their best behavior from now on while visiting Gensokyo, and will be giving an apology gift to Reimu and Remilia. Furthermore, the apology will be publicly signed by all parties, including a third party, namely Eirin. The Watatsukis will also get a copy.

Meiling will be conducting the negotiations in a polite manner, without being overly friendly, but certainly not being hostile.

Finally, the sexy party is a go. But for those concerned, I'll be keeping it clean, and will try to play it for laughs. So don't worry, no /at/ stuff.

Update later today.
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New thread:


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Well, I dunno how I did on the romance, but I gave it my best shot.

Thread 1: >>/sdm/54956
Thread 2: >>/sdm/55386
Thread 3: >>/sdm/55803
Thread 4: >>/sdm/56153
Thread 5: >>/sdm/56497
Thread 6: >>/sdm/56844
Thread 7: >>/sdm/57149


"...I'm gonna go talk to the Komeijis, and see if they can help us in any way," I finally speak up. "If that fails, well... might as well go ahead with the wedding."

"The marriage of Reimu Hakurei and Remilia Scarlet," Sakuya muses, "Forming the Hakurei-Scarlet bloodline... that's something that Aya can't miss, no matter what!"
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Did not notice that another thread is full. Congrats.
Okay, gonna call it for dancing with Sakuya! Update will be in a new thread, later today.
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New thread:


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Lucky thread number 7!

Thread 1: >>/sdm/54956
Thread 2: >>/sdm/55386
Thread 3: >>/sdm/55803
Thread 4: >>/sdm/56153
Thread 5: >>/sdm/56497
Thread 6: >>/sdm/56844


As a light drizzle starts to fall from the cloudy heavens, I sigh deeply, running a hand down my face. Part of me just wants to go back to bed and sleep through this. The tengu are pretty isolationist to start with, so why not let them handle their own problems?

On the other hand, Aya is loose. Which means that she may be stalking innocent, heroic little Cirno even as I think things over. Or, she might be vengeful, which means everything from blackmail to a direct attack are a possibility. Given the mansion's role in bringing her down previously, this was a threat that we could not ignore.

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Hmmm. Kind of a spread of votes this time around. Gonna call it for luring Aya to the ceremony, with a side of consulting the Komeijis.

So, funny story. The whole 'catch Aya' thing was originally going to be 3-4 posts. Then someone proposed a staged marriage, and this happened (not that I'm complaining). Funny how things happen, yeah?

Anyway, update will be in a new thread sometime today.
5 bucks says Remilia and Reimu ignore the "staged" part.
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New thread:


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Flipping through the list, your eyes catch a favorite of yours. Remilia might like this one.

“Alright, I’ve found one. ‘Sympathy for the Devil’”

The music begins. You listen to it for a moment, and then begin to sing when your cue arrives.

“Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m a man of wealth and taste,”

“I’ve been around for a long, long year, stole many a man’s soul and faith.”

As you sing, a small part of your mind begins to wander.

“And I was round when Jesus Christ had his moment of doubt and pain…”

“Made damn sure that Pilate washed his hands, and sealed his fate.”
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The semester is nearly over. I'll start writing tomorrow.
Just went back to try to re-read this story, and it seems that thread 2 is missing from the archives. Is anyone else getting this issue, or is it a problem with my internet?

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