As she left, Eiren dragged the burnt corpse with her, followed by putting the opposite doors to the ones I was blasted through back up. It was impressive, what with the corpse and rabbit in tow all the while.
"Ugh... It's been forever since I dressed up in silks. This shit just feels weird now."
I gave my best girlish giggle, glad that the doctor had stopped laughing at me every time I spoke. "I'm sure you would prefer to bear that rather than such a draft, yes?"
"I guess." She then let out a snort, adding, "Still, what was up with the doc?"
"Ohh, uhh... ...She had a bit of an accident with some laughing gas, I believe? I may be mistaken, however."
"Huh. Well, that must suck."
"Ohh, I assure you that it does."
Her eyes drifted off to a particularly interesting corner of the room. "So..."
I gave her my best puzzled look, all cute and confused. Or, y'know, it would be if I weren't a thug. "Yes?"
Her eyes turned back to me, and I was shoved against the wall by the considerably smaller woman's considerably smaller arms. "Wanna blow each other apart?" Her stare was a far cry from the intensity from before, but now it was downright sensual
I opened my mouth.
I closed it again.
My cheeks went red at the closeness, not to mention the weird mix of perfumes and charred silk. This wasn't my proudest boner, but it was definitely one that was well deserved.
That said, when Mokou looked down in confusion, that redness drained away.
That draining seemed to affect other regions, as it had the nice side effect of killing my friend's rise to power.
Although, when Mokou gave that area a squeeze
it both went back up and I doubled over in pain, knocking her down. That left the two of us in a very precarious position when the door opened back up, and I was almost certain that it hadn't been even half of the agreed upon length of time.
Giving the two of us a bit of an amused smirk, the doctor asked, "Am I interrupting something?"
"Why the hell does Kaguya have a..." The immortal trailed off, before mumbling, barely audible even at my range, "P-penis?"
Raising a brow, Eiren question, "A what? You'll have to speak up if you plan on having your question answered."
Still quiet as a mouse, that once angry whitehead muttered, "Penis..."
After a moment's pause, the doctor looked to me, hoping for and answer. I supplied, "She asked about my penis."
For a long moment, Eiren was a silent, but then it passed. "The princess requested it to be attached, and I am not one to refuse such a request."
That left the immortal in shock. "Why??"
"Why, for what purpose do you think she might want one? You see, as it turns out, she was never interested in men at all, much to my surprise." ...You know what, I'm just gonna go with her story. Whatever.
"Wait, so all this time, the impossible requests were..."
"Yes, that's right. All in an effort to be left alone by her suitors."
Mokou was left baffled by the answer she got."Why??" Talk about a broken record...
Seeming satisfied with her own explanation, Eiren asked, "Now, shall we, Princess? We've much to do to see you brought back to your full majesty."
While Mokou was grumbling, I answered, "Ahh. Very well, Eiren." I rose to my feet, allowing Mokou to finally breathe easy now that I was off of her.
"Seems someone needs to lay off the sweets. Jeez... It's like you've tripled in weight while I wasn't looking!" Kinda did, I'm pretty sure. The princess was a twig, but a hot one.
Eiren turned, looking over her shoulder. "Come along, Princess."
I looked over my shoulder, thinking I had a way to get this murderous moan off my ass. "We'll finish this later..." I gave her my best 'sexy woman' look. Either she'd be disgusted, so I'd probably be saf— Wait, why is she blushing?
With my peace said, I followed after the doctor, leaving Mokou all by herself in my scorched room.
When we finally arrived after making our way through the winding corridors, we were back where it all began: the office of the good doctor. Closing the door behind me, followed by turning a latch, Eiren turned to face me. "Now, isn't this a pickle you've gotten yourself into, 'Princess'." She didn't have to bother with any finger quotes, as the air was thick with 'em.
I flopped into a chair, groaning. "This is well beyond apparent, I hope you reali-" Wait, I don't need to act like a princess. "No shit."
"Now, how pray tell did you end up in this situation? I assume your story is far from the truth, yes?"
I rubbed the back of my head, answering, "I mean, most of it is true. Only the very start changes anything."
I let out a sigh. "Well, it began when your princess found me yelling at a rabbit—"
"Ahh, yes. I had hoped you might realize that I meant a humanoid
rabbit, but it seems I was wrong." She gave a short bow. "My apologies, 'Princess'."
"You can stop calling me that, y'know."
"I would, but your reactions are just wonderful." ...Great, she's a weirdo.
"...Aaanyways, she pulled me into her bedroom and called for that rabbit girl. They talked for a bit, so if you want a second witness, talk to her. She was sent off to get some mochi and tea when the ceiling fan fell. I tried to get the thing off of her, and her neck snapped."
"I presume you didn't realize she cannot die."
The way she said that got me to look at her funny. "Why would I?"
"You could have been told by the... fairest
competing princess, as it were." When I gave her an odd look, she added, "Mokou."
I lowered my shades for effect. Seriously, that's something that calls for it. "That rough tomboy is a princess?" Y'know, assuming she meant her. I knew the names of everyone else thus far, though.
She began to chuckle. "Once upon a time, yes. ...Or so I am told, at least. But, well... who am I to question the stories of my princess?"
"What, was she exiled?"
"No, no. That would be ours." I lowered my shades just a bit lower. "Ohh, will you stop that already? You look ridiculous. As for what I mean... let's just say that immortality is frowned upon in our homeland. As for Mokou, the two of them have been more or less at war for the last thousand years, give or take. You see, Kaguya scorned Mokou's father's interest in her."
"Sounds a bit petty, honestly."
She began chucking again. "Beyond petty, to be frank. Not that Kaguya handled things much better, as much as she taunted the poor girl." She headed over to a cabinet, withdrawing a syringe. "Now, leaving that aside, I've need to 'restore' your 'beautiful locks'. Try not to bite your tongue off."
I paled a bit at the implications of her words, but didn't stop her. "Why, though? You'd think you'd want to be rid of me by now."
She tested the needle, and rolled up my sleeve. "Let's just say that I'm curious how my princess will go about reclaiming her rightful place." She began to swab my arm, cleaning the area, before lining up the needle. "Now, this will hurt quite
She jabbed the needle in, getting me to wince. At first I thought she was exaggerating, but then she started injecting the serum. My eyes widened as liquid flame spread up my arm, every fiber of my being screaming in agony.
No, wait. No, I was the one screaming in agony. It hurt so much it was making me dizz
When I finally woke, I found myself feeling like new. How long was I out? Must have been a while.
When I sat up, I yelped and fell back down. Who the hell was yanking my hair?? I look left, and I looked right, finding nobody either way. Looking up, I saw a snickering immortal. The albino one.
Giving her a scowl, which seemed more right than what I was giving before, I asked, "What is it, Mokou?"
"You're sitting on your hair, dumbass."
"My hair?" I looked over my shoulder, finding myself laying in a pool of hair. ...Well, shit. Looking up my sleeve, I found that my tiny hand was still exactly the way I left it, and couldn't help but groan. Dammit, Eirin. I should have asked her to fix my hand while I had the chance.
I began to struggle with my lengthy pool of hair, trying to get it so I could sit back up. After yelping six more times, Mokou rolled her eyes, offering me a hand. When I gave her an odd look, which I expected of the princess, she explained, "You look pathetic. As nice as it is watching you struggle, you've been at it for at least five minutes now."
Satisfied that Kaguya'd be satisfied with Mokou's answer, I took the offered hand, and was unceremoniously rolled to the side with a painful jerk of my arm. For the next minute, Mokou started gathering up my hair in her hands, tugging it out from under me. While she did, I asked, "Was that necessary?"
"Nope. But it was
enjoyable." She had a self-satisfied smirk on her face when I looked over my shoulder.
"Bitch." If she wants to fight with words, fine.
"...Trollop." Shit. I'm out of insults.
She had a bit of a shit-eating grin on her face when she asked, "Trollop? Really?"
I just rolled my eyes, shooting back, "Do you have anything better? We've exhausted a great many insults already."
She blinked, clearly at a loss. "Uhh..." She started scratching the back of her neck. "...Obviously." I smell a lie.
"Ohh? And what might that be?" Now it was my turn to smirk. Noticing my hair had been cleaned up, I rolled back over, sitting up the rest of the way.
She stiffened, before blurting out, "Bastard."
I did my best to giggle, and for some crazy reason she started to blush. Hopefully she didn't actually like the sound of it, and it just amused her, as that was the stupidest-sounding laugh of all time. "Much better." I put on an even bigger smirk, and shot back, "Cunt."
She jumped, now backed even further into that obscene corner. "You... uhh... rascal??"
And then I just burst out laughing, while she was left grumbling.
It was then that there was a knocking on the door, and I looked, spying a rabbit-eared silhouette through the ricepaper. "Yes?"
In a very familiar voice, the shadow said, "It's time for breakfast, princess."
I smiled, answering, "Very well, Reisen."
I was surprised when she slid open the door, and as I began to stand, she quickly located another well-hidden closet. Gather up various pieces of clothing, she then was suddenly in front of me, reaching to remove my clothes.
Of course, it was at that precise moment that I got hard, and my sleep clothes put up little resistance, straining against it very noticeably. From the look of it I was in a kimono, but even kimonos have limits, no matter how thick they tend to be. The rabbit's hands froze up, and her eyes went wide in alarm. Mokou, on the other hand, averted from it, trying to hide the redness that even reached her ears.
It was honestly adorable.
Swallowing, the rabbit set into motion once more, clearly trying to ignore it as she tugged the obi slack. Taking a steeling breath, she then tugged open my robe, making sure she wasn't in what obviously was the direction a towering tree would fall. Which is to say she did it from behind, making sure that I was as exposed as exposed can be. Mokou, of course, averted even harder, as she was in the direction that towering tree would fall.
First, she prepared granny panties for me to step into, which I reluctantly did.
Next, she set about layering me in kimono after kimono, then placed what amounted to a frilly mess of a shirt on top of that. Thankfully that was enough layers to hide my erection, as it wasn't going down any time soon after being stripped by a woman as hot as the Rabbit.
She retrieved a fancy comb, and set about running it through my hair for an agonizingly long amount of time after that, though the humming made it feel like even longer, even if in a good way. The combing did feel kinda nice, that said.
Mokou was left with even less to do than I was, so she flopped onto her back from where she was sitting, and just stared at the ceiling. She had a sad look on her face. Melancholic, I think they call it? It was as if she was remembering something from a long time ago, and she eventually turned that frown into a bitter smile, though it only ended up transferring the frown right over to myself.
"Reisen." If there's one thing I can't stand, it's a sad girl, infinitely older than me or not.
"I want you to comb Mokou's hair."
The two of them looked at me in varying degrees of confusion, Mokou's so shocked it caused her to shoot upright just to look my way.
After a long, awkward silence, Reisen moved over to Mokou, looking about ready to flee at a moment's notice.
Mokou huffed, complaining, "Sending the Rabbit to do your dirty work? That's low, even for you."
I held up my hand, signaling for Reisen to stop, and she actually obeyed. If I were the power hungry type, that'd be plenty enough to put a grin on my face. With Reisen stopped, I headed towards the two, holding out my hand to Reisen, getting a far greater shock out of the two, though it said something that the rabbit still complied, and much faster this time, handing over the comb.
"Then I suppose I shall just have to do it myself, now won't I?" I gave her my best 'amused bitch' look, and sat down behind her. I could tell that Mokou was tense beyond belief, having me so close and in her most blind of blind spots.
I started undoing her ribbons with practiced ease, and realized that I must have been out a while. She had her old clothes back, after all. Weird that she has multiples of the same outfit. Still, if there was one thing I knew about women, it was the hair, even if only on this front. The ribbons were oddly warm, and seemed to be charms of some kind, but they undid just like any other knot. When they were all in a neat pile, though not really neat-neat, I started running my fingers through her hair a bit to get those bundles back into the main mass of hair.
"Tsk, tsk. You really should take better care of your hair, Mokou. It's a mess." Seriously, she was atomized just earlier! You'd think it'd not still be this bad off if she regenerated!
"Ohh, can it."
"Very well." With that said, I began gently running the comb through her hair, smiling as I did. Doing this reminded me of my little sister, who used to always beg me to do this to help her fall asleep at night. More than a few times she fell asleep on the spot, even. At first Mokou was stiff and rigid, resisting every motion of the comb, but with time she began to relax just a bit, her body going from a coiled spring to an uncooked noodle. Not the fresh kind, either. The crummy ones you get in a box, all dry and hard. Still, her hair was practically a jungle of tangles and knots, resulting in me needing to go at it for quite some time.
Just as she was nearing total relaxation, Reisen pointed out, "Breakfast is going to go cold if you undo every
tangle, Princess." She had a wry smile on her face as she said it, so I knew she meant no harm, but the moment she did, Mokou flinched, returning to her springy self.
I let out a disappointed sigh, saying, "Very well, Reisen. I can make my way through this jungle another time." My words got Mokou's ears to go as red as her eyes, and put a smug smirk on my face as I reached for a ribbon, gathering the girl's hair up in the other hand. I wasn't about to leave her alone just
yet, and so I began to put her ribbons back where they belong. There were quite a few ribbons, so it wasn't a quick thing to do, but I was able to do it at a fairly good speed, I felt.
Huffing and clearly not sure what to make of all that, the immortal muttered, "Thanks. I guess."
With that, I rose from my knees, smiling at my apparent servant. "Shall we?" Said servant blushed as she gave a nod, and then lead me along to where she had in mind. I was thankful for her help, as I had no idea where to go, and so said, "Thank you, Reisen."
"I-It's no problem, Princess..." Her ears began rubbing together out of extremely obvious nervousness, as if she wasn't used to something as simple as a 'thank you' for her work. Not that ears should probably work like that, but it was the most likely thing that actually made sense, all things considered. She's a rabbit, not a bug or something, right?
When I arrived at breakfast, the table was a lot more full and the selection way more scarce than you'd expect to see a princess eating. Sure, there was a lot of it, but there couldn't be more than 5 different dishes piled high. With the rice and mochi taking up a massive section of space, I couldn't help but wonder if it all would be eaten, even with the countless rabbits and rabbit girls scattered about.
And, on the note of the rabbits, they were also seated at the table, with what looked like napkins used as bibs, wielding chopsticks like any other of the occupants. Not the rabbit girls, which there were plenty of, but the normal rabbits, just surrounding a big ol' banquet sorta table.
Before I could take my place at the head of the table, one of the numerous doors that lined the walls suddenly opened. It didn't just slide open, but practically shot
The happy, friendly atmosphere of the room evaporated just like that, and every eye in the room looked in the direction of their princess, who still was dressed like me and was covered in dirt. Seemed someone or other must have buried her.
The ex-princess roared, "Who the hell buried me?!" Called it! "I am no corpse, you stupid rabbits! We have been over thi—"
Suddenly my favorite rabbit was behind that girly 'me' and had her in a stranglehold. "So you were alive after all, you bastard..."
Gagging on the arm around her throat, the real Kaguya grabbed at it, trying to pull it free, but to no avail. "What—" She coughed at trying to speak through the tight grip. "What is this... this treachery
Eiren cleared her throat, looking beyond amused at it all. "Release him, Reisen. I seriously doubt a man that nearly met his end to Rumia would be a threat that could do anything approaching lasting
Reisen at first persisted, but eventually let the woman that was dressed up like me break free of her grasp. Seeing as I was reported to do some pretty horrible things, her reaction wasn't exactly all that strange. After that, the real princess coughed for a while, clearly not happy with the treatment of her windpipe.
Y'know, I have to wonder if I'm being used as some convenient tool to get rid of their princess.
...Good lord, they aren't planning to replace her with me, are they? Because, seriously, that would be beyond
stupid! I'm not even a freaking woman! There's only so many asspulls you can do before your story falls apart, dammit!
The obviously superior princess pointed at me. "This is clearly an imposter!" No shit.
Reisen just scoffed, as if it were completely outrageous.
The rest of the rabbits, rabbit or otherwise, looked between me and the real princess, seemingly confused. Too confused for my tastes, as it gave the impression that the stupid things couldn't tell who was who.
Eiren, on the other hand, actually bothered speaking. "And on what grounds do you say this?"
Like any normal person would do, Kaguya stared at the doctor as if she grew a second head. "Surely you jest, Eiren."
"That is Dr. Yagokoro to you."
"You can't be..." The ex-princess let out a long, annoyed sigh. "I am the princess, Dr. Yagokoro
"Is that so?" The doctor looked amused, as if she didn't already freaking know
. "And what makes you believe such a thing?"
She motioned to me. "His shoulders are wider than mine."
"Our princess can be brutish, yes."
"Wha- I- You-" Taking a deep breath to untangle her tongue, the princes ground out, "When has your princess ever worn glasses such as those?!"
"I believe she began to make such a fashionable decision as of yesterday." Trying too hard, Doc; even the princess is giving her a dumb look!
Finally having enough, the beauty let out a long sigh. "I hereby challenge your princess for her vague right to the Lunar throne." Woo! I can get out of thi— Wait, Lunar?
Reisen was the one to speak up this time. "What?! Why would a man want to be a princess, let alone know of a tradition like that??"
Giving me the stink eye, the princess muttered, "I have to wonder much the same." I was left averting my gaze, a blush on my cheeks. I wasn't exactly planning this.
Eiren just rolled her eyes, asking, "And what, pray tell, are the terms of this challenge?"
"Why, that is simple." The princes had the most wonderful smile on her face. It didn't last long, though. "You kill us each, and whomever it is that gets up first wins."
That was enough to drain the color from my face. Shit, no wonder nobody seems to like her.
The doctor just smiled, answering, "We accept. Such a condition will be easily met."
Before I could get a word in, some particularly authoritative and short rabbit girl decided she'd speak up. "You really think that's a good idea, Doc?"
Eiren smiled, seemingly confident. "Why, yes. Reisen, kill them both."
Reisen pulled out her gun, aiming at the newcomer.
Eiren corrected, "The princess and the man, Reisen."
Reisen cursed, seeming to be upset by this and aimed at m
I blearily opened my eyes, feeling like every atom of my being hurt. "Anyone get the license plate of that truck...?" Shit, what hit me...?
Suddenly a giant hand scooped me up, bringing me to giant chest-height. "It seems that the princess won, as should be expected."
I looked at Eiren's giant face, then at all the ash on the ground, and finally to the shocked rabbits around us.
Shit. Now more than just my hand is tiny.
Ohh, right. I guess I'm the new princess of the moon or something...? I don't see the princess around.