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File 15082886366.jpg - (690.12KB, 2480x3507, Death comes on wings of bike.jpg) [iqdb]
64882 No. 64882
I couldn't help but mutter, "Just what have I gotten myself into...?" I had just left a bus whose driver spoke in unsettlingly cryptic messages, and now was left with a far more disturbing scene ahead. Looking back when I heard the bus drive off, I found a complete lack of any vehicle, bus or otherwise. Swallowing my heckles down like tiny frogs, I looked forward instead, to the aforementioned disturbing scene. What I saw wasn't pretty; a scene right out of a horror movie, in fact! Complete with its checklist of spooky stuff, too!

Seriously, if I had one, I'd bet money that everything around me would leave a full column of check-marks!

After all, there were tombstones, dead trees and a liberal smattering of seemingly pointless skulls in what looked like a freaking graveyard. And that was just the left! To the right, a cliff with a sheer drop of at least a hundred feet bottomed out with a jagged end in a sea of what I hoped wasn't freaking blood! And down the path, far in the distance, was a school that looked more like a haunted mansion rather than a place of learning! "Shoulda just freakin' said screw it and went back when I had the chance... I'd rather drop out than chance it." I got a chill up my spine at what all this could only lead to. "Feel like I'll just go missing or something if I stick around this pla—"

"Look out!" Huh?

I looked back just in time for a blonde to run me down on a bike. Last thing I saw was a pretty headbutt and no small number of stars.

When I came to, I found my bangs to be covering my entire face. That can't be right. "Ugh..." I nursed a fresh lump on my head, complaining, "The hell...?" Before me, I found that the blonde obstruction was actually a girl, and not my own hair. Wasn't expecting to see another blonde around. I mean, it could be worse, but blonde isn't what I'd call a common color around these parts. "You, uhh... you okay?" My words seemed to get her to stir, as she was quick to sit up, squishing me under her all the more, though less with her front and more with the back. Hers was a look of dawning comprehension, and mine was just a little more than inquisitive. Sure, there was more to her than a pretty face and golden hair, but whatever it was, I wasn't seeing any of it; that pretty face and golden hair were real distracting.

"H-huh? Uhh... yeah. Umm..." My fellow blonde's face colored a bit as she got up and off of me. Pretty voice, too. "Sorry... I didn't mean to hit you like tha— Ahh! You're bleeding!"

I followed her worried eyes, and found them on a freshly scraped knee. "Guess I am, huh? ...Hadn't even noticed. Well, it ain't that ba—" My voice flattened. "What are you doing?" This time it was my turn to blush, as she was licking my knee. Weird as it was, it was also goddamned adorable.

"I'b wicking yow wowd cwean!" Talking with her tongue hanging out is just a cheap shot. "Ahh! Yow bweeding mow!"

As she went in for a lick of my nose, I forcefully shoved her off of me. "Will you stop that?" My ears were tipped in more red still, as she was more than a little too close. Taking a deep breath to steady my nerves, I asked, "You have anything I could plug my nose with?"

"Ahh, umm..." She instantly was a flurry of motion as she rummaged in her school bag. While she was busy, I got off the ground, surprised when she offered some tissues not long after. "S-sorry. I just," she licked her lips, "I just couldn't help myself. You taste so good..."

Okay, so she's some kinda freak. Well, whatever gets you there, I guess. At least she's distracted me enough to make the graveyard less creepy, though it did shift it in her direction. "Name's Kirisame Marisa. You?" Have to admit, if anyone else called blood delicious, it'd be way more creepy and way less cute, though.

"Ahh." She gave a curtsy, explaining, "Flandre Scarlet, but you can just call me Flan if you like. It's, umm... Western order." After a moment she forced in the direction of awkward, she continued, "So... Scarlet Flandre in Eastern order. I guess."

I rose an amused brow, asking, "Well, I wouldn't take ya for the pudding type, but if ya say so."

With a pout, she pleaded, "Don't tease me... I may not look like it, but I'm—!" In the distance, the belltower of the haunted school began to go off, sounding more like it signaled an execution than what it almost certainly did. "Ahh! We're gonna be late! Umm... if you like, I could... give you a ride...?" Again with the cheap shots... Hard to even want to be upset when someone gives you an offer like that.

Shrugging, I answered, "Well, sure. Just don't kill anyone on the way and we're good." The way she blushed made me grin in equal parts to how embarrassed she seemed. She's just so fun to tease, adorable pout be damned.

Hopping back on her bike, she patted the back, but I quickly saw an issue in the plan. "Hey, uhh... Flan? Think that bike's not gonna be getting us anywhere."

"Huh?" I pointed to the now hanging chain, and she let out a depressed sigh. "We're gonna be late on the first day..." Tears began to well up in her eyes.

Can't have that, now can we? "Hey, hey! Cut the waterworks, okay? I got this." I gave the curious blonde a pat on the shoulder, and squatted down. Knowing just what to do, I quickly realigned the chain, though was more than a little clumsy at it. "There, good as new! Learned how to do stuff like that watching an old buddy of mine." My work done, I climbed on the back of the bike, quickly regretting it, as I was forced to hold on for dear life. How she didn't kill me when she hit me at this sorta speed was beyond me, but hey, not dead. I was, however, screaming like a little girl the whole way. If I weren't, I'd probably be concerned enough to bite my tongue, after all.

By the time we made it there, I was just about ready to make out with the ground I was so happy to be off the bike-turned-deathtrap. "Come on, we're gonna be late!" When she was done setting her bike in a rack as empty as this place seemed deserted, she tugged me along with her, near-on dislocating my shoulder in the process. Gonna feel that in the morning; girl's got some strength in those noodles... Still, it wasn't much of a run to class. Thankfully it seemed that we shared first period, as she dragged me the whole way to her classroom — and not a moment too soon, as the second bell rung when we opened the door.

All eyes on us like thunder just struck, I called, "Safe!" The snickers I expected were replaced by stares of awe. Before I could even start feeling embarrassed, I realized with a sigh that the eyes were all on my new stupid-strong buddy, who was completely oblivious to the admiration. That's a level of ignorance you don't see every day. Maybe to the point of being impressive, even.

A woman with ruby red hair set in a pair of silly-long braids gave me a grin, though, and said, "Guess you are, huh? Go on, then, you two. Find a seat." We went ahead and did that while she was busy smirking us up as if she had an odd idea about why we were late.

Or, at least, Flan took a seat. Never exactly let go of me, so I ended up uncomfortably far forward, even if I was comfortably seated next to her. Sure, I didn't have to squint, but I'm not what I'd call some sort of book worm or the like who paid attention and vied for the Teacher's attention.

Still, Flan sending a weak smile my way was like a salve for my wounded delinquent pride.

With us seated, Red cleared her throat. "Now, welcome one and all to Youkai Academy! My name's Kaenbyou Rin, but you can call me Teacher, Teach, or Orin! Catty nicknames will get you some lacerations, though~" I looked at her with alarm, though she ignored it, the joking tone evaporating. "Now, as you all know, this is a school for youkai, by youkai, and is meant to ease us all into society gently." Pointing to a picture of the Earth on the board, she continued, " Human society, that is; we sadly were a bit too late in leaving any kind of territorial footprint on Earth, so we have little choice. As such, if you see your fellow students leaving human form, you should take it upon yourself to get them to return to it! Humans are a finicky lot, so it's absolutely essential you not draw any attention out in a crowded city. The humans still haven't forgotten a certain sasquatch incident after all... Imagine something in a park or school!" Letting out a sigh of exasperation followed by knee jerk levels of perking back up, she explained, "As such, it's a skill we'll have to practice quite a lot, not to mention that it's what today's lesson is aaaaall about~"

Off in the back (which was a point of jealousy for me), some skinhead with a fluffy pink beard commented, "What's the point? All humans are good for is head and... head." He chuckles more sinisterly than I'd like, and that nobody was batting an eye made me more than a little concerned.

The teacher huffed, retorting, "Be that as it may, it's something we all have to learn. Besides, you'll find no humans here for head of either type, I assure you." The mention of head raised more than a few uncomfortable questions I let die on my tongue. "I mean, in the off chance you did, they'd probably be killed or eaten or something." The blood drained from my face as the room chuckled at what seemed to be a joke to them. And that Flan seemed just as amused by it didn't help one bit. "Still, to keep up the charade, the school rules dictate that we all have to do it! It's why homeroom is all about true forms after all~"

Beardylocks snorted, though gave no further comment, for which I was eternally grateful for.

As I obviously 'looked human,' I was exempt from participation in the class this time, as was my pretty little friend. Although, little was an understatement, what with me being the short one between us, no matter how childish she seemed. Weren't allowed to leave, though, so I had to sit there taking a part-time job as Atlas, hardly hearing a single bit of the lesson. And, by the time I was out, I felt more emotionally drained than I think I ever had been. At least the class was the only one of the day, what with unpacking and all that crap, but it lasted uncomfortably long for what amounted to an orientation. But, at the same time, I had Flan at my side after we escaped from that den of monster. Although, it was Flan whose strength made me worried, and it was doubly so Flan whose laughter had me worried. It's one thing for a punk to laugh about head, but a girl like Flan?

"Marisa, want to go see the grounds with me?" Flan held her hand out to me, a lighthearted smile on her face. ...Could I really be afraid of her when she smiles like that...? She's like a candle in the dark, as nice as she's been, even ignoring that... licking. Obviously there was no real choice but to take her hand. As we wandered the halls, Flan comments, "The architecture is so pretty here..."

Outside? No, not really. But inside, I felt like I honestly had to agree. All carved stone and fancy wood, polished and lacquered and all that crap. All the same, I was a bit distracted with how Flan seemed to constantly maintain the attention of the masses. Every single eye was focused on her, just as every gossip-flavored whisper had her as a subject. Whispers of what sort of youkai she was, and wonder at if she was single or not from what seemed to be nothing but creeps in an uncomfortably literal sense. Seriously, some looked like how you'd imagine a roach would look if it were human!

I mean, I was also curious, but at least my eyes weren't glued to her backside.

That was up until they all at once went silent, though, causing me to swallow my dread. Knew this feeling. Was the calm before the storm, like when a forest goes dead silent all of a sudden. I may be just a human, but I swallowed and paid heed to the shifting focus of their eyes, as at least I was observant. I knew it felt like something out of a horror flick, but I knew I was damned if I did or didn't look. And so I peeked over my shoulder just in time to duck under a huge hand grabbing at my collar. "Woah, hey, what are you getting grabby for!?"

It was the skinhead from before, who talked about killing and sex like it was the weather. Flan took a half step in front of me, putting on her bravest of faces. "What do you want with my friend...?" Her brave face was only slightly less scared than mine, but I appreciated it. Definitely gotta thank her later.

The skinhead snorted, ignoring the question. "The hell do you see in a guy like that? Such a scrawny thing he is..." ..Ohh, he had better not be talking about me. "Name's Kumoi Unzan. Why don't you lose the zero and get with the hero, babe?" He had that sort of smirk that just tells you his head is so far up his ass that he can't see two feet in front of him. Well, that, or I look like an ant from up there. Seriously, he's huge! When you have to describe height by elevation, that's not a good sign...

However, I was never one to back down, so before Flan could answer, I glared up at him from the base of meathead mountain. "Did you just call me a guy?"

Returning my glare, and causing me to take an instinctive step back, he answered, "What of it, shrimp?"

"Like hell I am, asshole!" I was quickly losing steam, what with the guy looking a little like The Hulk crammed in a school uniform. Way less cool, though, what with the pink fluff.

His hand moved too fast to see, and his hand grabbed my jaw between meaty finger and thumb. My eyes were wide, and filled with equal parts anger and fear. "Then maybe you should have a turn first, girly. Show you your pla—" Faster than I realized what I was doing, my leg landed between his thighs. His legs buckled after a drawn out grunt from him, and he eventually ended up on his knees, clutching his precious thing. The spell over the crowd was broken with that smallest crunch, mainly due to the guys all looking like they felt it. "You'll... pay for that... bitch..." Well, I feel like a David about now... His fall practically made bounce — and not the good kind!

It was then that Flan grabbed me by the hand and fled, dragging me along with her. My feet simply couldn't keep up with the sudden pace, and I stumbled and even got dragged by her halfway through the trip. When we finally stopped, we ended up in a little alcove with a juice machine that looked stylized to be cartoonishly monstrous in appearance. Flan finally looked at me, and our eyes met. And then her arms wrapped around me, and boy did they squeeze me tightly. "Thankyouthankyouthankyooou..." I heard a sniffle, and weakly attempted to return the hug. "I was so worried he was going to hurt us..."

It was then that the chair dropped out from under the noose, if you get my drift..

"A-aaair..." I felt her flinch before she let me go, though I was a little busy sucking down the object of my desire to thank her properly. Of course, I wasn't caught in her vice of a hug long, so I was quick to answer, "I just did what I had to." That said, I muttered, "Although, I think I'm gonna regret it..."

She winced, saying, "Still. You... you protected me. Thank you so much..." She smiled at me, and I couldn't help but smile back. Who says a good deed goes unrewarded? Smiles like that are worth more than gold!

There's no way that a girl like her would laugh along with Pinkey knowingly. Must be too innocent to know what head means, or too dumb to consider it, even if I'm loathe to call a blonde dumb on principal. "Hey, don't sweat it." Even if I may be a smear later, I wasn't about to back down. I brought a thumb to Flan's eye, wiping away a tear. Was glad it at least wasn't a job that called for tippy toes, though. Freakin' hate tippy toes. "Don't cry, alright? You're too pretty to mess up your face like that." Even if Unzan was probably gonna mess up my face later. ...Or worse. Or much worse. The hell is wrong with him?

She gave me a smile bright as the sun, and I sent her my own candle right back at her. "Alright. ...Still, umm... thanks. Do you... mind if I buy you juice?"

"Hey, now! Apparently I'm a guy, so isn't it my job to foot the bill?" We shared a giggle at that, which helped Flan settle down.

When she wasn't all giggles any longer, she mused, "...That was... the first time anyone's protected me, you know..."

I rose a brow at such a silly idea. "Ohh?" At her nod I couldn't help but joke, "Well, I guess it was my first time protecting a girl as pretty as you, then." I couldn't help but give her a big old grin, and chuckled when she blushed. "Still, you nearly dislocated my shoulder twice so far. I can't believe you'd even need protection."

She flinched at my words. "I-I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to, I just... I don't know my own strength somethings and— and—" Okay, time to give her a chill pill.

"Calm down." I gave her nose a flick, earning a yelp from the now distracted pudding. "And it's not your fault. You were just tryin' to help, right?"

"...Right." She didn't seem convinced, not that I blamed her.

"So we're good! Still, you seemed pretty wimpy for not ever being defended, even ignoring your iron noodles." She gave me an odd look, to which I clarified, "Your arms."

"I... I just didn't want to hurt him. ...That's all." She looked down, rubbing her arm awkwardly. She didn't look too sure of herself on that one. "Vampires are really strong, you see. I just tend to have trouble with, erm... being less than realy strong. So... I sealed away my power with a ribbon." She gave her pretty bow a tug to show it off.

A vampire, huh? "...How about some tomato juice?" Surely if vampires are real, pop culture won't lead me wrong! That it was cheaper and had a fanged mouth biting the name helped, of course.

She smiled brightly at the offer, answering, "How did you know I liked tomato juice...?" Just like an excited little girl, she replied, "Yes, please!"

They really do like the stuff, huh? Gonna have to remember how easy it is to please her. Popping in exact change, I handed over the can of red that didn't come from my knee or nose. Which I was eternally grateful for, as I'd have worse problems than I thought if I also found out I had tomato juice for blood.

As she gulped down her drink greedily, I couldn't help but smile at the sight. She really was cute, and just seemed to reinforce that image with her every action. Especially when she suddenly stopped, the can bottom-up, and blushed. "...Umm," she said from under the can, "can you not tell anyone that I'm a vampire? I spoke without thinking, and erm... I won't tell anyone you're a witch, okay?"

...Say what? "...Heh, what gave me away?" Silver tongue, don't fail me now! Seriously, I don't need a backfiring tongue.

She giggled, licking her lips clean of the tomato juice as she fiddled with the drained can. "Well, I hear that witch blood tastes just as good as human blood, and, well..." She trailed off, averting her gaze. "Your knee was really delicious."

...Well, looks like I hit the mother of all lies to use! If it tastes like a witch, surely it must be a witch, right? I'll just ignore the 'acts like a witch' part for now, as nobody likes a stereotype. "Thanks, Flan." I give her my biggest grin and best hug, as she gave me a shot at surviving this place to put it lightly. ...And something to pray for, too, as Orin did mention magic classes. I might have to give that my all and hope I have some level of competence with it above the negative.

"What are friends for? Now, let's get back to exploring! C'mon; the map shows a few interesting places!" With a giggle, she began dragging me here and there, showing me the weirdly pretty sights among the creepy ones. Mostly scenery and such, though there was this weird statue of a dragon. Eyes were glowing an odd blue. By the end of our exploration, we wound up at a particularly precarious cliffside overlook, dangling our feet over the side. The waters beyond were the same as before, and the sky had a gloomy look still. However, having her here made it just a bit less unsettling, the absurdity of literally everything here.

"Y'know... as crazy as this place has been, it's not as bad as I expected." Facial smearing notwithstanding.

Flan gave me a nod. "It has a quiet dignity, yeah." Noticing the weird look I was sending her way, she blushed. "W-well, it's nothing like the hustle and bustle of the human cities, is it?" Nervously, she muttered, "It's so quiet here..."

I couldn't help but chuckle, earning myself a pout. "Guess that's a word for it." I laid back, my golden mess splayed out behind me chaotically while my hands were tucked under my head for a pillow. "Me, I'd just call it weird but peaceful." Snorting, I muttered, "Nothing like back home, that's for sure." We didn't have nearly this much mention of head after all, ignoring the more obvious craziness.

Flan agreed, "I suppose it isn't, huh?" Leaning back, she continued, "I... used to go to a human school, so I like this peace." Behind her, that pretty spun gold pooled, her side tail making the left more akin to a dragon's hoard, though.

"Ohh?" Have to pretend that's a big deal for me, else I get eaten or whatever.

"Mm-hm. I... didn't enjoy it there. I was teased and teased without end for being a guerrilla." I just couldn't help the snort of laughter I let out, and it earned me a far more upset pout than the others. "What...?" Those tears need to be put under lock and key and banned from competition! Just plain unfair!

I let out a sigh, as I felt a bit bad for upsetting her. "Well, I dunno. I mean, you're not nearly as hairy. If there were guerrillas as cute as you, the world'd be a pretty weird place. Maybe a nicer one, too. ...Although, I went to human schools my whole life, y'know." Mainly because I am human, but she doesn't need to know that.

"You did...?" She rose a brow in curiosity, apparently wanting to hear more.

"Yeah. Was a pretty boring place, full of pretty boring people save for my one friend. Here, though? It's exciting and has a cutie like you. It's... alright in my book." Still miss her. Watching her fiddling with crap, my feet kicked up on the table, was the highlight of my days. If only I could have made the cut on her high school. Woulda hated it, but with her around, well... woulda been alright.

"It really is... Even if there was that scary man from earlier, I feel like I fit in here. And... I have a friend. ...I don't even know what friends are supposed to do, but it feels... nice." Girl needs a hug, but now's a bad place. She can get it good after I get up.

Though we laid there in silence, I felt that we could both agree that it was far from uncomfortable. Under the stormy pink skies and over the crashing red waves, I found myself contented with it. At peace, even.

That was up until a fist began to form in the clouds, looking much like the eye of a storm. It was then that I finally realized that the sky looked like cotton candy now. Reminded me of a certain asshole's beard, and not in the good way; not that I could, y'know, imagine a good way.

That was when I began to sweat. "Uhh... Flan?"

"Hmm?" She peeked open an eye to look my way.

"Does the sky tend to... punch people around here?" Please say yes! ...Actually, on second thought, that still sounds pretty bad.

With that said, Flan gave me an odd look, only to gasp when she looked back up. "I-I don't think so, no..." There was a look of familiarity in her eye similar to what I imagined that dawning realization looked on me.

As it finally careened towards us, we quickly began to scramble to our feet. Flan was faster by far, but I didn't think it was intended to hit her. Of course, that hardly mattered, as it was still about to smash both of us. That is, up until Flan picked me up like a sack of potatoes and flung me out of the way. "Flan!" As I sailed through the air at an uncomfortable speed, everything happened too fast for me to hope to react in any way but flailing.

And yet there was no deafening crash of fist on stone, and no squishy crunch of fist on Flan. The pink smoke just spread across the ground like dense fog. However, by the time a figure began to become apparent, I finally hit the ground and rolled more than a little. It wasn't graceful, nor was it over quickly, but I was alive, if with a heaping helping of pain. Of course, I'd been in my fair share of scuffles, so I was quick to rise once the stars had cleared. Looking to where Flan had thrown me from, I found her to be in the arms of that skinhead from earlier. Kinda sad that he dwarfs her a little as well. Must eat a truckful of greens...

Shaking my head clear of the last bit of dizziness, I shouted, "Hey, asshole! Leave her alone!" The way he looked at me sent a chill up my spine. I had always been a bit shrimpy, but I made up for that in guts, kinda like a miniature dog. But the look in his eyes, mixed with his great size, made me want nothing more than to flee before he spilled those very guts for me. Felt like a poodle before a wolf, that's for sure...

So I took a step forward, gritting my teeth. No standing down; there was no room for it.

He let out a snort, not letting Flan out of his grasp, much to her obvious discomfort. "You think a pipsqueak like you can take me down...?"

For once, I honestly can't lie about that with a straight face. "...No. I don't."

He let out a great bellow of a laugh. "Then get the hell out of here before you wind up dead, ya crossdressing shrimp." That sneer he gave me caused me to ball my fists. ...Ohh, it is on...

"No." With a look of amusement on his face, the mist began to gather in his fist, forming a big, pink, misty hulk hand. "I don't have to against a pinkette as weak as you." I half couldn' believe I said that, but also knew it'd get him riled up.

That amusement quickly turned to anger, which led to me instantly regretting having more balls than sense. He let loose a punch from a good 30 feet away, and the pink mist speared towards me in the shape of a fist. My eyes widened in the same time it took for it to reach me, and I was blown back not by any physical force, but by hurricane force winds. I heard the ripping of wind and cloth, and was pretty sure I got whiplash from the force of the gust.

"Marisa!" As I landed in a heap, my consciousness going in and out off and on, I heard what sounded like... footsteps? "Marisa, look out!!" The footsteps didn't shake me, but the calling of my name gave me a foothold to regain my awareness, and the warning pulled in my attention. Looking up, I found Unzan's leg rearing back to kick me into the crashing waves below.

"Goodbye." He had a satisfied smirk on his face.

With a growl, I did all that I could, rolling out of the way when he swung his leg. Expecting resistance, he toppled backwards, Flan going flying with a yelp while I stopped shy of killing myself unceremoniously. My muscles screamed in protest, but I managed to rise long before the giant of a man had the chance to get back up. I did the only thing I could think of; the only thing I knew for certain would fell someone so much larger than me.

It was my turn to use my leg, and I did so not in a kick, but a satisfying stomp. At his howl of anguish, I did so again, and then once more for good measure. Every action of my leg was pushing those muscles to their limits, as I didn't want a round 3. I couldn't handle a round 2, but a round 3 was just out of the question; If he was going to come again, I'd ingrain fear into his balls. I may be human, but that doesn't make me a pushover.

Flan rose from where she flew when he went down, not seeming more than a bit winded. "M-Marisa?"

Huffing and puffing as my heart pounded, I just flopped on my back. My everything hurt, but nothing felt broken. Good thing, too, as the moment she propped me up, I heard a growl from behind her. My skin went bone white as pink smoke began to rise from his limp form, his physical body melting into nothing. "Flan... Behind you...!" Her eyes widened, and she turned to look back.
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>> No. 64883
File 150828939776.png - (2.02MB, 1000x1399, Don't expect accuracy every time.png) [iqdb]
64883
"Face the wrath of a nyuudou!"

I reacted faster this time. Flan spoke of a seal: the ribbon in her hair. And so, doing all I could, I tugged the ribbon free, her blonde hair going wild in the wind. The smokey fist that was coming straight for us got blown away in an instant as a solid wave of pressurized... power dispersed it like a blastwave, and sent me tumbling once again. Was starting to get a bit nauseous from it all, but wasn't about to barf with that thing there.

Flan's eyes were wide for just a moment, but not another moment later they lost that childish innocence, and instead hardened into those of a cold, calculated killer. Her hair lost all color starting at the roots, and she soon had hair that looked more like platinum compared to the gold from before.

Her chest also grew.

Wasn't sure why her chest grew, but I wasn't complaining.

As Unzan reformed a bit farther from us in all his pink glory, he seemed more than a little intimidated to say the least. "What sort of monster are you?!" She looked to the pink cloud, and simply cracked her knuckles. "Fool! You... you can't harm me with a punch!"

"Is that so..." She held her hand out to the side. "Thank you for the tip." Scarlet energy blazed from her hand in opposing directions, forming a staff. "I shall gift to you my own..." The head of a spear formed at the tip of that weapon of hers, and the pressure given off by her killing intent was making it hard to breathe.

Seemed to do a bit more for him, as he begged, "Wait, no! Stay back!" Never thought I'd see a cloud beg.

"Know your place..." She pulled back her arm, and flung the spear straight through the musclebound cloud, scattering him to the four winds to the tune of his plea for mercy. It was at that point that I blacked out, but not before she took back her ribbon with a huff. "A brave fool, you are. ...But, I suppose I was saved by such a fool, wasn't I. ...Hmph." As my consciousness faded, I heard one last thing.

"I suppose there are worse sorts of fools; you've my thanks."
>> No. 64884
File 15082895416.jpg - (173.83KB, 1018x1440, Get your finger out of my face.jpg) [iqdb]
64884
When I awoke, I felt like I had just been flung thirty feet, punched by a hurricane and been on a rollercoaster one time too many. Of course, that there were memories tied to these things helped, and I wasn't dumb enough to disregard my own memory, as dreams don't make you feel like you were put through a spin cycle on the beating setting.

"So, you're finally awake." Wait... that voice. "I can't believe you came here. Never took you for, well..." I looked to the familiar voice, finding a bluenette I thought I'd never get to see again. "Still, the hell happened?"

"...My everything hurts."

Nitori let out a sigh, pinching her brow. "Yeah, I was kinda surprised you can even feel your everything after you," she took on a mocking impression of a certain pinkette, "felt the wrath of a nyuudou. Seriously, what were you thinking?"

"My everything hurts." Well, it's true!

She let out a long-suffering sigh. "Okay, I deserved that one. Still, how are you even here? You're human, right?"

"Nnnnnooooooo."

"Yeah, thought so."

"No, I'm a witch."

"And I'm Gamera. You'd have to be a really crap witch to constantly be getting into fights and flunking... well, everything."

"Hey, I got an A+ at lunch!"

"Marisa, are you a human or not?" Her brow was flattened irritably, to say the least.

"And gym!"

"I swear to god, Marisa, if you don't answer the freaking question..."

Okay, enough messing with her. Time to get real.

— - — - —

[ ] And by real, I mean liberal amounts of lying. Insist on being a crap witch, specialized it crap magic. It's so stupid it has to be true!
[ ] Fiiiiiine. Let her in on the secret. She's lucky she's your best friend.
[ ] Wait, Gamera? Why Gamera? What do giant turtle monsters have anything to do with anything?
[ ] Write-in.

— - — - —

I've been fiddling with this a while now. For those of you who read my other stuff, sorry about the delay, but I've been a bit backed up thanks to a case of writer's block. For those that don't, uhh... that's fine, I suppose! Still, this is gonna be my focus next month, so expect daily updates starting on the first, with a side of the other stuff now and then. Gotta get my groove back, and I know this story can do it. Hope it's good for you all, too!
>> No. 64885
[x] And by real, I mean liberal amounts of lying. Insist on being a crap witch, specialized in crap magic. It's so stupid it has to be true!

Not to be a downer, but I think the original flowed better. Ease up on the italics, please.
>> No. 64886
[x] Wait, Gamera? Why Gamera? What do giant turtle monsters have anything to do with anything?

Priorities
>> No. 64887
>>64885

Sorry about that. That tends to happen when I'm left unable to post something for almost a month; I start "fixing" it obsessively. Still, it'll hopefully be smoother sailing from next update on.

Thank you for the input, though. I do appreciate it.
>> No. 64888
[X] And by real, I mean liberal amounts of lying. Insist on being a crap witch, specialized it crap magic. It's so stupid it has to be true!

Sewage... mancer
>> No. 64889
[X] And by real, I mean liberal amounts of lying. Insist on being a crap witch, specialized it crap magic. It's so stupid it has to be true!

Rosario Vampire? Now there's a blast from the past. I can't wait for our wacky romantic comedy hijinx with Flandre, Koakuma, Letty, Alice, and Patchouli.
>> No. 64890
There are a TON of typos... and this is coming from someone who has English as his third language.

>Guerilla warfare

Oh hey, this is back.

Now you have to make a new story starring Comandante María Kirisame, loyal follower of El Che.
>> No. 64891
>>64890
Forgot my vote:

[X] Insist on being a crap witch
-[x] A literal one.

Flaming shit potions incoming!
>> No. 64892
[X] Wait, Gamera? Why Gamera? What do giant turtle monsters have anything to do with anything?
- [X] Alright, fiiiiiine. Let her in on the secret. She's lucky she's your best friend.
>> No. 64893
>>64890

Spelling's not my strong suit. When the doc doesn't squiggle it, and my beta doesn't point it out, I often miss things. Sorry about that. I'll try to be more careful next time.

Although, it did slip my mind entirely to fix that one in particular. Whoops.
>> No. 64894
[x] Wait, Gamera? Why Gamera? What do giant turtle monsters have anything to do with anything?

When in doubt, stall. It won't work for long but it might work for long enough.
>> No. 64895
I've wanted to continue this for quite some time, so you have somewhere between 3 and 7 hours until I call it. Or, in other words, once I'm available to pound it out.
>> No. 64896
Let's see if I can get out an update tonight. If not, NaNoWriMo is gonna suck, as I'll have to do it anyways.
>> No. 64897
File 150848659041.png - (272.74KB, 359x407, Stop lookin' at me like that.png) [iqdb]
64897
[x] And by real, I mean liberal amounts of lying. Insist on being a crap witch, specialized in crap magic. It's so stupid it has to be true!

— - — - —

I opened up with my usual shiteating grin and fired back, "Well, never said I was a good sorta witch." When I saw her flat glare somehow get even flatter, I knew I had to use the big guns. "I'm actually a pretty shit witch, with emphasis on the shit: ocrapromancy is my specialty. From flatulence to crud, crap to poop, and everything in between, I can sling mud like the best of the—"

"III'm just gonna stop you there, Marisa." She massaged her temples with clear agitation, as if she didn't believe me. How dare she not believe my brand of BS! "I can tell when you're trying to shovel bull down my throat. Known you long enough to recognize that grin." Not like that's ever stopped you, has it?

"Y'know, you're not makin' me sound any less like a crap mage. I'll have you know, I come from a long line of ocrapromancers! My mother's mother was shoveling bull down throats before it was popular! I'm pretty sure hers was as well, but, well... never met her."

"Okay, seriously. Just... just stop, okay?" Nitori let out a sigh. "If you think you belong here, fine." What a sourpuss. Still, that's not a look you see every day; she honestly looked concerned for you. "Just... if you don't, promise me you'll get out the first chance you get, okay? I don't want you getting hurt, or worse..." Well, seeing as I stood toe to, uhh... testical with a Nyuudou (Whatever that is), I think I fit in pretty well!

But let it not be said that the great Kirisame Marisa is without a heart. Seriously, that's an obvious lie, as I've got a soft spot for the girl. Heaving a sigh, I relented, "Fine, fine. I promise I'll get out, but only if I have no other choice." Giving her one of my best winks, I offered up a pinkey.

My offer earned me a roll of wet eyes and a snort. Still, Nitori did accept it, linking pinkies just like back then. "You're not gonna ever let me forget about that, are you?"

I gave my best sub-shiteating grin, answering, "Well, I'd be a real Wicked Witch of the West if I forgot how we met." Even got the waterworks goin'!

"True..." Seeming to have have run out of things to hammer through your skull, she finally let the tense atmosphere evaporate, flopping back onto a bed much like the one I found myself on. "...Missed you, Marisa." She gave a sheepish smile from where she lay, which I returned to sender, though held the sheep. Seriously, shipping sheep just sounds like it'd end badly.

"Heh." There's the Nitori we all know and love! "Missed you, too, squirt."

"Still, what'd you do to get that pink guy wailing on you like it was going out of style?"

Stretching a bit, I answered bluntly, "Kicked him in the dick for comin' on to me. Think he was into guys and made a mistake or somethin'."

"Right. A mistake." One could practically grab the sarcasm out of the air, it was so thick. "You sure he didn't just call you a guy?"

"Pssssh. Like anyone would make that kinda mistake!"

"Thaaat's a yes."

"Ohh, shut it."

"Still, you gonna make him your lackey or something?"

...Y'know, that might not be a bad idea. Still, there was one far more important question one my mind. One that, without the answer to, all would be lost. "So, where am I?" Or maybe just me. Probably just me, yeah.

"Some crazy blond was carrying you like a potato sack, so I snatched you up after explaining our relation. Took you to my dorm room." Good ol' Nitori.

"Heh. Thanks for that, Nitori. Doubt the infirmary or whatever would have been the best idea."

"Not like you're human or anything, right?" She shot a wry smile my way.

"True enough!" The two of us shared a chuckle at the absurdity of it, even if I had a feeling our reasons were polar opposite.

"So..."

"So?" Gotta give her a nudge sometimes, even if it was just verbal.

"How'd you wind up here, anyways?" That's honestly a good question.

I simply offered a shrug, explaining, "Well, was the only school left I could get into. Not exactly a straight A's kinda girl, y'know?"

She let out a snort. "I'd be surprised if you even passed your classes, honestly." Ouch. It's like my non-existent nerd pride is being tested!

"Jeez, what a bully!"

"Ohh, shut up; we both know that you're the bully between us."

"What can I say? Never can have enough lunch money, right?" Still got plenty of room to grow, after all.

"How we even became friends, I'll never know."

"Well, your junk is just the best." I could stare at it for hours, even.

"Marisa, I'm kicking your ass if you say that in public."

"You always say that!" Besides, threats delivered with a smile tend to not work so well.

"And it's always worked." The bluenette gave a roll of her eyes, continuing, "Still, there's a matter of your actual dorm room to deal with."

"Whaddaya mean?" Dammit, shoulda looked that gift horse in the mouth more. Bastard ran off!

"You know as well as I do that there's no way I'd just so happen to be your roommate." While you were mid-groan, she smirked, explaining, "And so I transferred you to mine."

"Ohh. Well, uhh... thanks?" That certainly won't bite either of you in the ass!

"Think nothing of it; boring through their firewall was child's play." Slathering an unhealthy amount of smug on, she adds, "Obviously it wasn't made by a kappa." Ohh god, she's snorting with laughter. Hate when she gets like that.

"A what-now?" Nitori went dead silent. You know, if she's gonna be like that... "Those are... those butt-munchin' river spirits with the pickles, right?"

"We aren't—!" Her mouth shuts with a click.

Well, this promises to be fun. But how to get her to spill the beans...

— - — - —

[ ] Kiss ass; if there's one thing that Nitori loves it's having you pucker up.
[ ] Ask how she did it; she'll never shut up.
[ ] Bugs Bunny her, somehow. You doubt it'll work, but if it did, you'd never let her live it down.
[ ] Try to recall anything you can about kappa. Probably gonna get it mostly wrong, but if you know her well enough, there's no way she won't correct you.
[ ] Give her affection till she either dies of embarrassment or blabs.
[ ] Let sleeping Gameras lie. For now.
[ ] Write-in

— - — - —

Turns out that the issue was that my lovely assistant didn't realize I attempted an overhaul of the first two posts. This explains quite a lot, as he said an abnormally small amount on the matter, yet said a fair amount on the third. I just thought that he somehow found nothing needing fixing, so assumed myself to have gotten it right.

Also, sorry about the delay. Had to have it looked over, and he was busy.

>> No. 64898
[x] Give her affection till she either dies of embarrassment or blabs.

The love witch kills with kindness.
>> No. 64899
[X] Ask how she did it; she'll never shut up.

Don't make an ass of yourself, she might pounce.
>> No. 64900
[x] Ask how she did it; she'll never shut up.

Nerd mode engage.
>> No. 64901
[x] Bugs Bunny her, somehow. You doubt it'll work, but if it did, you'd never let her live it down.
-[x] That's why you keep this carrot in your front pocket, just in case you need to imitate the Bugs.
>> No. 64903
Called!
>> No. 64904
File 150880299022.jpg - (337.61KB, 1075x1554, MFW.jpg) [iqdb]
64904
>>/gensokyo/15189 My official declaration of entry.

May god have mercy on my soul... Why do I do this to myself?
>> No. 64905
File 150880618875.jpg - (5.02KB, 126x103, 16602597_1560206244020195_5663994677716032465_n.jpg) [iqdb]
64905
>>64904
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIFLtNYI3Ls#t=54
>> No. 64919
File 150891834077.jpg - (183.83KB, 700x700, Asking the important questions.jpg) [iqdb]
64919
[X] Ask how she did it; she'll never shut up.

— - — - —

If there's one thing I know about Nitori, it's that she'll never shut up if you push her buttons, no matter which you press. Make her mad and she'll scream. Make her happy and she'll ramble. While I could make her mad, that she could prooooobably rat me out if she wanted means that I've gotta work with her, not against her. "So... how'd ya do it?"

The girl perked up hard enough that her pigtails bounced before she asked, "Well... I'm sure you don't want to hear it all..."

I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "No, no; I'm sure I do." Just answer the question already, Nitori. Need to find out if she's a butt pirate or not.

"Well, I started with faking your signature." Classic Nitori. "But, as that still would have been subjected to processing and bureaucratic drama, I knew I had to skip that step; I wouldn't want to risk your life over due process." Good to see that she's still breaking the rules as it suits her. "Although, as I said, their security is laughable; even a human could crack it."

Here we go! Got her gloating. "Really? Why's that...?" Even if it's interesting, I gotta make like this is some grand conspiracy to my feeble mind. She'll eat crap like that up like a sap.

"Well, the idiots hid the password on a slip of paper, for one!" She's got as cute of a grin as ever, at least. Same old Nitori, even if she is some sorta freaky turtle thing.

"Heh. Dumbasses..." Couldn't help but smile; talking about it reminded me of our time in middle school and all of our wacky hijinks.

"I know, right?!" Theeere we go. Now she's all hot and bothered. "But I wasn't taking the easy way out; my pride as a kappa wouldn't let me, so I knew I had to do it the hard way. First I DDoS'd 'em, then, when they were nice and ready, I jammed in my jack. Downloaded the firewall. Why?" She chuckled, sporting a grin almost as big as my best. "Because why not!" She let out some snorting laughter. Ohh god do I ever hate when she does that. "After that, I swapped out the file and replaced their firewall with one of my own! Ain't nobody getting through it but a kappa!"

"A kappa, huh?"

"Yeah! We're the youkai best at fiddling with tech!" Time to just put on my best grin and wait. Smart she may be, but she's a real jabberjaw when she gets going. "Everything humans have ever made, kappa have been making better since the dawn of time! Y'know how every game ever gets cracked and pirated? All us." Aaaany second. "AI?" She snorted. "Ours aren't racist assholes. Heck, we can pull off anything Macgyver's done and more with about the same stuff or less! Humans have nothing on us!" C'mon, Nitori. Don't have all day. "Railguns? Easy! Coil guns? Big whup!" Seriously, my cheeks are starting to hurt, dammi-

Theeeeere we go; her gums stopped flapping. "What's wrong, Nitori? Suddenly went silent, there. Was reaaaal curious about all this talk of kappa."

She was the very picture of a deer in headlights: eyes wide, lips parted, and trembling a little. "Uhh... Y-yeah..." She rubbed the back of her head, muttering, "Guess the cat's out of the bag, huh...?"

"You mean the Gamera, right?"

"Ohh, shut it." She let out a sigh of exasperation. "Well, I guess we're even, huh? I know you're a witch, and you know I'm a kappa."

"Sure do, butt munch!"

"Quit that."

"Ass lass?"

"That's worse."

"Britch Bitch?"

"Now you're just trying too hard. Look, you can't tell anyone I'm a—"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk... You really think I'd just go and reveal that for no reason? When you've got me by the balls as it stands?"

"Will you shut up about the balls...? I only eat imitation shirikodama."

I couldn't help but chuckle at the sound of that. Why was it even surprising that those were a thing, what with all the coexistence talk."IIII'll just take your word for that."

"No, seriously, I don't eat souls."

"You're the one making it sound worse, y'know."

Ol' turtleneck looked at me funny, as if I might be lying. Me, lying? Why would I ever lie? "You don't care?"

Gave her my biggest, cockiest grin."Just don't go frenching my rear and we're good. I mean, we've known each other since we were kids, right? You think I'd let a little thing like eating souls get in the way of our friendship?" My voice took on a more teasing note. "The first time I got a whif of your feet was more trying than than this is, to be honest. What you do behind closed doors is none of my business; just don't expect me to bend over and beg you to nibble my tush, capiche?"

Nitori just stared at me for the longest time. Almost felt like I said something wrong up until she pulled me into a hug. "Thanks, Marisa."

"Hey, what are friends for?" Gave her a pat on the backpack and let her go. "So, how's about we get some shut eye?"

"Sure thing, Marisa." With that, she reached over and clicked off the lamp beside her bed. "No homework or anything, so an early sleep doesn't sound so bad. Can discuss how you'll get out in the morning." I heard the heavy landing of that pack of hers. Always been curious what she keeps in the thing, though never been able to get a good look.

"...Right. Get out."

After a short pause, the light turned back on. "You paused." A concerned kappa stared me down again. "You're hiding something."

"Hey, now, I'm not hiding anything! I only said I'd leave if I were human."

"Which you are."

"Not if I can use my brand of bull to dazzle them into believing me!"

Nitori, for her part, takes it well; she wasn't bashing her head against the wall quite yet. "What part of dying didn't you understand...?"

I let out a sigh of my own. "Y'know how you were all alone and lonely and crap when we were kids?"

After a long, oddly probing silence, Nitori confirmed, "Yeah."

"Well, you know that blonde or albino or whatever? Well, she seems about as lonely." Nitori pinched her temples, seeming to be expecting a migrane any second. "So, as such, I figured she needs a friend like me!" Aaaand the rubbing commences! "So I'm staying."

"You said you'd go!"

"I never agreed to go."

"You promised you would; you even pinky swore!"

"Yeah, I did, but not like that. I said I'd go if I felt I didn't fit in. And, honestly? Haven't felt too out of place save for Candi getting all up in my business."

After a lingering stare, Nitori's stoney glare begins to crack. "...Candi?" Heh. Got her snickering!

"Y'know, tall as a mountain and has more cotton candy on his face than your average festival?"

"Okay, that's just silly." Still, did its job; I can tell she's gonna let it drop. "...Fine. But we still have to figure all this out. If you're gonna be an idiot, you're gonna be an educated idiot." Me, learn something? Tall order, that. "Wait, how'd you even come up with witch?"

Ahh, right. "Flan said I taste like a witch."

"Actually, scratch that; I don't want to know.."

You're more than happy to oblige with a roll of your eyes. "She's not like that, Nitori. I'd not be surprised if she thought the stork brought the baby, honestly."

That got a snort of a laugh out of her. "Really? What, did she take a bite out of you or something?" Not letting me answer, she took a few verbal steps back. "Still, a witch, huh? Easily the most believable thing you could claim to be. Especially a crap one..."

"That's a thing?" Here's hoping it's not some kinda golem stuff. Being punched by a cloud was bad enough, but saying you sic crap on people would be a bit much.

"No, I meant a witch that sucks at being one." Sighing, she explained, "I don't know a lot about them, as, well... I grew up around humans, but witches are practically human to begin with. Was why I almost wanted to buy it, up until I thought about the fact that you would probably be the worst witch in history."

I gave a nod, asking, "So, how do I make it believable?"

"Tomorrow, Marisa. We've got a lot to talk about as it stands, and I want a clear mind. You know that I'm terrible at coming up with plans when I'm sleepy."

"Right, right." She's also fun to tease when she's tired. Still, that can be saved for another day.

"Goodnight, Marisa." After the light went out again, she muttered, "Missed you."

I couldn't help but chuckle in the dark. "Missed you, too, Nitori. Goodnight."


"Klaatu... Berata... Nicto!" The toilet gurgled and vibrated, but then fell silent.

"No, no, no; that's all wrong! It's Verata!"

I couldn't help but let out a groan. "Is it really that important? It pretty much sounds the same!"

"It's the difference between your golem coming out solid or liquid."

Why did oshitomancy have to be a real thing? This sucks! "...Okay, right, I'll just try again! Klaatu... Verata... Nicto!"

The toilet trembled as your wicked deed was completed. An unearthly roar, like a thousand toilets flushing, ripped through the air. The toilet at first began to jerk and vibrate, before finally going still.

And then, it split with a great crack as the arm of your shitty monstrosity rose from the drain.

"Bind it!"

"Huh?" With what?!

"With the binding spell! Bind the golgothan!"

Ohh god. What do I do? I don't remember the spell!


"Shit!"

"Ack!"

I heard a thump from across the room, then looked up to have found Nitori having tumbled out of bed. "Err... You okay down there?" You couldn't help the smirk on your face.

With a groan, she sat up, only to throw an odd look my way a moment later. "Did you just scream 'shit' at the top of your lungs...?"

Not sure if I wanna be laughed at by Nitori for a week, so let's try some redirection. "So, how's about that plan?"

From the way she rolled her eyes, I knew she knew I was changing the subject. Still, she allowed it, and instead focused on considering what to do. She rubbed her chin in thought, as if she had an impressive wise old man beard. ...Heh. A turtle with a beard? As if! "Well, it's simple; you're gonna have to find a witch to tutor you. Make up some kinda sob story about being raised by your abusive aunt and uncle."

Does that mean... "Wait, you mean I can learn magic?"

Giving a shrug, the kappa answered, "Well, you might? I mean, I honestly don't know much about magic. Kappa rely more on strength and our tech to get things done. Only thing I can do is manipulate water."

Okay, Nitori's cool points went up a bit. "But aren't people like 90% water? Sounds pretty powerful." It'd be a messy way to win a fight, but against, say, a living pink cloud, it might be handy.

My question got me an eye roll. Well, I thought it was a good question... "That's some advanced stuff. Most I can really do is simple stuff, like breathing under water."

"Right. Nothing freaking awesome about that. Nope. Nothing at all!"

"It's not that big a deal when it's just something you're expected to be able to do..." Heh. Got a blush outta her.

Nitori thinking that isn't amazing won't do. As such, I gave her a frown, pointing out, "Well, imagine if you couldn't." At her odd look, I added, "And now imagine swimming under the water."

Nitori shuddered noticeably. "That does sound pretty bad, yeah."

"See? Now, who's awesome?"

She started blushing, but relented, "Me, I guess..." Changing the subject, she said, "A-anyways, let me go get ready for school." With that said, she rose from her place on the ground and headed off.

Sniffing my pit, I winced, knowing that I couldn't put it off. "Wait, where's the shower? We have our own, or...?"

Snorting, Nitori answered, "We do, yeah. It's got a tub, even."

Huh. Ritzy. "So, who gets it first?"

"Err..." Snickering, Nitori said, "Go ahead, I guess. I know you barely take any time at all, so you should go first." Says the one who was trying to pull a slow one. Seriously, girl takes long baths.

Giving a cheeky grin, I pointed out, "Well, not everyone likes playing with boats in the bath at our age."

"I-I do not!" Noticing my chuckling, she pouted, obviously feeling slighted. "I haven't done that in years! ...And they were ships, thank you very much."

"Sure, sure. Whatever you say, Shelly."

"Ohh, shut up and take your shower." She let out a huff.

"I'm going, I'm going!" With that said, I grabbed up a towel after a bit of searching, made sure I had the amenities, and got to work. Same old, same old; only took a good ten minutes to finish up, and another five to get my hair toweled. With practiced ease, I put my braid back in place after a rigorous brushing. Yesterday's tussle left my hair a tangled mess of dirt, so I had to get it all fluffed up and annoying. And people wonder why I go out with bed hair... Wrapping up, I headed on out. "You're up, Nitori."

"Alright. Thanks, Marisa." When she looked up, she gave a sputtering doubletake. "Why didn't you get dressed in the bathroom?!"

I gave a shrug, answering simply, "Never thought of it. Now, get going before I flash you." Can never not tease her; just too fun to not.

"Ugh... Fine, fine!" She was quick to put away her newest toy she was fiddling with, and quicker to head off. Priorities.

With her gone, I took the time to yoink it and looked it over a bit. Kinda reminded of an RC plane, but more sturdy than you'd get in the store. Maybe a drone? Didn't see any weapons or cameras to tease about, so I just put it away. That done, I got dressed, grabbed my stuff and headed on. Checking the syllabus and time, I figured I'd have enough time for breakfast. Might even find some sorta witch, not that I expected it to be as simple as a broom and pointy hat.

While I headed for the cafeteria, I couldn't help but feel that more eyes were on me than I was accustomed to. The guys looked a little out of it, but the way the girls were looking at me was familiar enough; they smelled gossip in the water like it was blood. I swear, if they think me and Unzan are an item, I'm gonna flip my lid. No way, no how. Just wouldn't work, even with his desire to make a blonde pancake ignored.

On the way there, I spied Flan, who seemed to be heading to class, judging by her current route.

— - — - —

[ ] Call out to her.
-[ ] Maybe she'd like to join me. ...Hopefully she doesn't want a witch smoothie, though.
-[ ] Just make sure she knows you're okay; don't want to bug her or anything.
[ ] Continue on alone.
[ ] Write-in.

&&&&&

[ ] But what to get... Assuming they have it, anyways.
-[ ] Write-in.
>> No. 64920
> I swear, if they think me and Unzan are an item, I'm gonna flip my lid.

[x] Call out to her.
-[x] Maybe she'd like to join me. ...Hopefully she doesn't want a witch smoothie, though.

MokaFlan all the way.
>> No. 64922
[x] Call out to her.
-[x] Maybe she'd like to join me. ...Hopefully she doesn't want a witch smoothie, though.
>> No. 64923
[x] Call out to her.
-[x] Maybe she'd like to join me. ...Hopefully she doesn't want a witch smoothie, though.

Realistically, we should make sure to stick close to her anyway. we don't want anyone jealous of our cloud-wooing ability.

And, besides, shenanigans happen around. As for food...

[x] Eye of newt, toe of frog, wing of bat, tongue of dog...
-[x] No, seriously, get something normal with a witchly option. Gotta keep cover. And you can always use slight of hand to dispose.
--[x] And, getting drink, make sure you're absolutely sure what it is. Or water. Clear containers are a plus, too. You don't want to try what Flan has, after all.
>> No. 64924
[x] Call out to her.
-[x] Just make sure she knows you're okay; don't want to bug her or anything.

Ignoring would be silly, but there are other characters to meet, I'm sure.

[x] Eye of newt, toe of frog, wing of bat, tongue of dog...
-[x] No, seriously, get something normal with a witchly option. Gotta keep cover. And you can always use slight of hand to dispose.

Ha, this works.
>> No. 64925
[X] Call out to her.
-[X] Maybe she'd like to join me.

Things are cool until proven otherwise.

[x] But what to get... Assuming they have it, anyways.
-[x] Mushrooms. If anything, they'll double as emergency rations.
>> No. 64927
This will either by the first NaNoWriMo update, or the one after this will be.

[x] Call out to her.
-[x] Maybe she'd like to join me. ...Hopefully she doesn't want a witch smoothie, though.
&
[x] Eye of newt, toe of frog, wing of bat, tongue of dog...
-[x] No, seriously, get something normal with a witchly option. Gotta keep cover. And you can always use slight of hand to dispose.

>> No. 64928
File 150926121335.jpg - (63.16KB, 700x467, I swear it's staring.jpg) [iqdb]
64928
[x] Call out to her.
-[x] Maybe she'd like to join me. ...Hopefully she doesn't want a witch smoothie, though.
&
[x] Eye of newt, toe of frog, wing of bat, tongue of dog...
-[x] No, seriously, get something normal with a witchly option. Gotta keep cover. And you can always use sleight of hand to dispose.

— - — - —

"Yo, Flan!" I gave her a wave, a big ol' grin on my face. Her head snapped to me in an instant, her eyes wide with surprise. "Seems I'm gonna be just fine!" When she practically launched herself at me, I only barely stumbled out of being tackled. The next student in her path was not so lucky, however; pretty sure that'll smart in the morning. Wincing, I asked, "Could you maybe not tackle me like that? The time with the bike was bad enough as it stands."

Flan took a break in her spine-breaking to look to me, then she realized she was hugging some (arguably) lucky guy real close and shoved him away with a yelp. For his part, he took it like a champ; how he got to that position with a glass jaw was beyond me, though. "S-sorry!"

"S'fine, Flan. Just remember that I'm hurt right now." Ignoring that I wouldn't easily survive that at my best. "Anyways, wanna join me for breakfast?"

The vampire's eyes stared at me in silence before she broke the spell by swallowing. "Umm... sure! Let's go to the cafeteria, then!" Perky as ever, not that I was complaining. Put a smile on my face and warmed my heart, to tell the truth.

Motioning her to follow, I said, "C'mon, then." Gotta get going before anyone finds the body, not that I thought he was dead, what with how well Unzan took blow after blow to the groin. Still, having a half-dead guy at your feet doesn't tend to get looked at in a positive light. 'Sides, they probably know my rap sheet; best not to make a scene.

The trip there was uneventful, though I did notice that the guys about were a bit off. Had this sorta... zombie kinda look to 'em. Were it later in the year, I'd wonder if they were up all night studying, but, as things were, them being like this on the literal second day of school was fishy as all hell.

Still, wasn't my problem, so I kept heading for the cafeteria; if it becomes my problem, like with Loverboy, then I'll start worrying. The cafeteria was the regular hustle and bustle, the lunch lady was passing through stuff like a ghost, and the food's smell ranged from 'good' to 'fight or flight'. Figured it was hard to screw up eggs, so I went for those, with a bubbling green soup on the side. Wasn't gonna eat it, but it did have eyes and junk floating in it. That it smelled good was probably the scariest part. Still, if I'm gonna play the part of a witch, gotta at least eat for the part, right?

Flan, of course, got some tomato soup. Although, she did surprise me by showing her true colors as a cannibal: she got a flan, too. "So. You, uhh... eat flans."

"Yup! They're tasty."

"...And your name is Flan."

"W-well, my nickname...?"

"So, I guess you could say you are what you eat, huh?" Couldn't help but chuckle at my own joke.

Flandre blinked a couple times before giggling a bit, as if only just getting it. "Silly." After that, silence ruled over the table with an iron fist. Wasn't a long tyranny, but it was one that sated my appetite; the eggs were just as tasty as I expected.

Still, the soup was still there. Was also still looking at me.

— - — - —

[ ] Down the hatch. Hope it doesn't make me quack like a witch; tasting like one's more than enough.
[ ] Ohhhh... Ate too much... So full... If you're full, obviously you don't need to be eating it, right? Right? Just gotta excuse it away.
[ ] Juuuuuust put it in a bottle for "later" or something. Toootally gonna use this in a spell. Honest, it’s to help your complexion!
>> No. 64929
[x] Down the hatch. Hope it doesn't make me quack like a witch; tasting like one's more than enough.

This can only end in one thing: entertainment.
>> No. 64930
[X] Down the hatch. Hope it doesn't make me quack like a witch; tasting like one's more than enough.

What's the worst that could happen?
>> No. 64931
[x] Down the hatch. Hope it doesn't make me quack like a witch; tasting like one's more than enough.
>> No. 64934
[X] Juuuuuust put it in a bottle for "later" or something. Toootally gonna use this in a spell. Honest, it’s to help your complexion!

Emergency alchemy ingredients (makeshift grenade)!
>> No. 64935
File 150949305928.jpg - (97.45KB, 850x488, Soon I shall die of exaustion.jpg) [iqdb]
64935
Today is the day my suffering shall commence. My goal is 30 updates in 30 days, and I full well intend to do so. If I miss a day, shall make up for it, but my intent is daily updates, so I shall need the help of the voters to make it possible. As such, please assist me in torturing myself; I need at least three votes per day.
>> No. 64936
[X] Down the hatch. Hope it doesn't make me quack like a witch; tasting like one's more than enough.

Writing now.
>> No. 64937
File 150955025077.png - (588.61KB, 733x733, This will be fun.png) [iqdb]
64937
[X] Down the hatch. Hope it doesn't make me quack like a witch; tasting like one's more than enough.

— - — - —

Alright, soup — or should I say deadly poison? Maybe even acid? Yeah, that's right, soup; I know the skinny. you're an imposter, huh? Tryin' to trick me into eatin' ya. Little miss ohh-so-innocent, who's been referring to herself as soup all this time, continues in her charade. Cute. Real cute.

But I'm not about to fall for some kind of cheap trick like that.

I've got ways of making you talk; terrible, terrible ways. Ways that you'll never forget. Ways that will keep you awake long after it's over. But, y'know what? I don't need 'em. Nope. You know why, soup? I'll tell you why: I don't know a thing about chemistry or toxicology, but I know saturday morning cartoons. Yeah, that's right; I know how to check things like you for their deadliness. Plastic spoons might not melt to you, but my little friend, Chopsticks? Ohh, she'll melt if you just look at her funny. So, Acid VonPoison, this is your last chance to give up the ghost, and I don't mean the lunch lady.

...Silent treatment, huh? I guess it's time to show you what I do to wise guys like you...

I take up a chopstick: the tool with which I'd finally undo her reign of tyranny. The tool with which this all will come to an end.

And then I poke it into the soup. It doesn't shrivel, nor does it burst into flames. There's no scent of fire, nor any sound of... fizzing? I'm honestly not sure what acid sounds like when it eats stuff, but this certainly isn't it; I pulled back a perfectly intact chopstick.

Flan helpfully pointed out, "A spoon would work better."

I gave a nod, obviously needing such a hint. "Right. Silly me." I'm not sure if she's a ditz, or being sarcastic. Sounded all sophisticated last night, y'know? Gone was the bubbly cutness, and the

Seems I gotta apologize, soup. Apologize for all I said and did. You were innocent all along, and yet I put you through hell and more. Guess I gotta eat you up to make amends. I'm hopefully a growing girl, so you'll be vital to my growth. Hope you can learn to forgive me; I'd hate this meal to end in tears.

And vomit. But mostly vomit.

I took up my far more familiar tool: the simple spoon. She's not as flexible as a chopstick, and even less so than two, but, of the two sets of tools? Most familiar, easily; reliable as all hell, even. When it comes to meals, a spoon'll see you through a great many. Even more, if you get creative.

And, that said, I proceed to risk her life on the soup, making sure to get one of the eyeballs for good measure. Kirisame Marisa is many things, but a chicken isn't one of them; if you have to eat something weird, never do it in half measure. Good way to miss out on something important, ending up left behind; even the bits of broccoli get their turn. Either this is some kind of hearty cream of broccoli and... eyeball soup, or I'm gonna end up testing that silver tongue of mine.

Well, in for a penny, in for a pound. I brought the spoon to my lips, trying my best not to grimace at the thought of the eye. I squeezed my eyes shut, and simply ate it to the feeling of the gruesome pop I was expecting. Definitely not human, thankfully. But, whatever it was? Kiiiinda wanna take a big ol' bite out of it about now; the soup is as delicious as it smells. The way the eyeballs pop in your mouth gives it a unique grape-like feel, if I had to guess at what it reminded of.

The soup didn't last much longer after that, though. Seriously, if I weren't trying to avoid much notice, I'd go on up and tell the cook exactly how I felt. Looking to Flan, I found her to be watching me with great interest as she sipped on her tomato soup; she was curious, that much I could easily tell. "...The broccoli and fish eye soup blends two worlds of very different flavors together. It really comes together like mashing two completely different puzzles into one, but what I wasn't expecting was for the pieces to fit together perfectly."

"So it's good?"

"...Very good."

She gave me a bright smile, and I couldn't help but hand it back; needed shades to handle something like that. "I'm glad. I was worried I'd have to dodge it when it came back out."

I couldn't help but blink a few times, before bursting into laughter. "Me too, to be honest. Not the most appetizing look to it, but I knew there was a reason it was there."

Behind Flan, I noticed that the lunch lady was smiling my way. I gave her a grin of my own, as well as a thumbs up to show I liked it. If I had to guess, I'd say that everyone was too chicken to try the stuff. She probably loved my balls, so I figured I was in good with her. Leaving her to giggle from where she was serving up food, the two of us headed for class in satisfaction.

As we went, I noticed that the guys were still just as out of it, not to mention just as zombie-esque. We, of course, kept ignoring it; no way was I making this my problem, though the gossips were chattering about it like it was nothing. I took this as a good sign, as that meant it wasn't that odd in youkai country, wherever it is that they lived.

When we arrived, I begrudgingly took a seat next to Flan. Was homeroom, so I hardly had some major... well... anything that needed doing. All about forms and crap, so I was a bit outside the ones that needed it. Before long, tall pink and bulging came in.

And then I grinned.

He was trying to ignore me. He was trying to ignore Flan. Trying to just forget.

But would I let him? Could I let him?

— - — - —

[ ] Be an ass. Make fun of him for his loss.
[ ] Be a dick. Not so big now, is he?
[ ] Be a bitch. Rub his nose in his loss.
[ ] Be a jerk. Just smug at him.
[ ] Be kind. Just let him off the hook, if only for now.
[ ] Be brave. Try to recruit him to your posse.
[ ] Write-in

Let the daily updates begin!
>> No. 64938
[X] Write-in
-[X] Just ignore him. That looser's not worth your time.
>> No. 64939
[x] Be kind

The 8th paragraph kind of gave up and died halfway through.

Good luck on the nanowrino and I hope y
>> No. 64940
>>64939

Crappit. Sorry about that; I was being distracted a bit while editing, and I
>> No. 64941
File 150956779659.jpg - (121.72KB, 445x641, A bit on the nose.jpg) [iqdb]
64941
Let's see... I'm sleep deprived, but lemme try to fix it up a bit.

>>64939

I gave a nod, obviously needing such a hint. "Right. Silly me." I'm not sure if she's a ditz, or being sarcastic. Sounded all sophisticated last night, y'know? Gone was the bubbly cuteness, and there was only what you'd expect of a vampire in its place. Kinda reminds of a classy shark in a way.
>> No. 64942
[x] Be a jerk. Just smug at him.

Recruiting is tempting, but our harem posse is going to be girls only.

The guys all look tired after what should have been a good night's rest, eh? Almost as though they were attacked in their sleep by something...some sort of...dream demon...
>> No. 64943
[x] Be brave. Try to recruit him to your posse.
>> No. 64944
[x] GUTS

Seriously, bravery seems to be our defining
>> No. 64945
[x] Be a jerk. Just smug at him.

He needs a nice, conservative girl to tie him down, not some uppity fake witch.
>> No. 64946
[x] Be a jerk. Just smug at him.

I felt that between the two winning options, this was the one that had the least opposition. Normally I'd ask for a tiebreaker, but I noticed a tad late.

On the plus side, this is effectively a time skip option, so the story moves about an update faster today.
>> No. 64947
File 150963614550.jpg - (78.23KB, 600x888, The forecast is partly angry.jpg) [iqdb]
64947
[6] Be a jerk. Just smug at him.

— - — - —

He's not worth my time. But, y'know what? I also got time to kill, and he's not off the hook just yet. So, with these things meeting in the middle, that comes to only one conclusion: I'll smug the crap outta him. That's just what happens when you lose to someone in the neighborhood of half your height; you get your socks smugged off. He knew what he was getting into, and so I gave him the smug treatment, my grin taking on a mocking tone. For his part, he looked more than a little irritated, but something told me he's not feeling too ballsy after yesterday.

Not after what I did to him. Not after what Flan did to him.

Gradually the classroom filled with the various weirdos I remembered from yesterday. Last on that list was, of course, the teacher, who seemed chipper as ever, and didn't even bat an eye at my serial smugging; either she didn't care, or she was pretending she didn't notice the way I was staring at him.

Still, all things must come to an end; as the clock ticked its timely tune, eventually the bell rung like a funeral was in session, signaling class to start. Teach cleared her throat, getting our attention for all of a second. Felt just like back home, and I couldn't help but get a kick out of that. "Now, today we have a special... quiz to take. As this is everyone's first," she sent a dirty look to Unzan, "and second year here, we don't have much in the way of information on what school of magic the lot of you are in-tune with. As such, we'll be spending class passing around a crystal ball, as you'll be having your first magic class later. Eat up at lunch, as magic is very good at burning off that baby fat~"

Almost as an afterthought, she added, "Ohh, and if anyone drops it, it will explode; so be careful~" This got everyone's attention, not to mention rose our heckles into the stratosphere.

As the clear ball was passed around, I watched it with equal parts curiosity and uncertainty, wondering what it would mean if there was no reaction. She talked like it was a guarantee, so could that meant that all youkai have magic, but not humans? And if it did, that'd make me as good as fertilizer, from what it seemed.

That is, if I don't take Nitori's advice, if only in part.

— - — - —
[ ] Explosions, huh? Well, no better way to delay the quiz than busting balls.
[ ] Knew I shouldn't have had that soup! Better head for the bathroom before I show off my ocrapomancy!
[ ] Just escape in 'embarrassment'. They can never know about your crap witch-fu.
[ ] Take it like a man. If I avoid it, it'd make things look all the worse.

Tomorrow should be longer again.
>> No. 64948
File 150966147078.jpg - (236.41KB, 1280x720, explosions.jpg) [iqdb]
64948
"--BOOOOOOOOORING! You don't wanna hear about that, Dear Reader! You wanna hear about LOOT! AND BOOBS! AND EXPLOSIONS! I'm Torgue, and I am here to ask you one question, and one question only:

[x] EXPLOSIONS?
>> No. 64949
[X] Take it like a man. If I avoid it, it'd make things look all the worse.

Either we bullshit an excuse or get stuck in special ed as a 'thaumaturgically challenged individual'.

Either way is amusing.
>> No. 64950
Calling in about 4 hours 36 minutes or so.
>> No. 64951
[x] Explosions, huh? Well, no better way to delay the quiz than busting balls.

EKUSPLOSION!!! is the only spell you need anyway.
>> No. 64952
[X] Blow up the class room.

a.k.a. the explosion option.
>> No. 64953
File 150970022139.jpg - (49.03KB, 530x398, YOU'RE GOD DAMNED RIGHT HE DOES.jpg) [iqdb]
64953
[x] EXPLOSIONS?

LOOKS LIKE WE'RE GONNA BE THROWING THIS MOTHERFU*KING BALL LIKE IT'S GOT A DATE WITH THE GROUND.

AN EXTREMELY HOT ONE, IF YOU'RE INTO THAT. I WON'T JUDGE.
>> No. 64954
Dang, missed the vote.
>> No. 64955
File 150972412287.gif - (0.97MB, 325x244, Not quite so dramatic.gif) [iqdb]
64955
[7] EXPLOSIONS?

— - — - —

NOW, IF THERE'S—

Whoops. Was getting a bit passionate about breakin' stuff, there...

Anyways, if there's one thing I'm good at, it's breaking things; I'm almost as good at it as Nitori is at making them! It was practically a point of pride of mine, back in middle school. Heck, knowing that this thing would explode honestly just sounded like a bonus, assuming my eyebrows came out of it unscathed. ...Then again, I might look the part of a monster if that happened; some of the guys I've seen around look somewhere between uncanny valley and terrifying.

Being in the front row, I was the third in line to handle it. Flan was offering it to me with a smile, the inside of the ball looking like a star, so aflame was it. Looks like it's the moment of truth... Taking the ball, I made like I was shocked when I touched the thing; nobody questions a static shock, after all. For that tiny instant I made contact with it, and in that smaller moment when only I was touching it, I saw the purest of crystal clear waters, full of bubbles. Was like looking down into the sea on a bright day, the way the light cascaded.

But that was only a short moment, as it wasn't long before I let it fly into the air with a yelp. I 'tried' to catch it, 'nearly succeeding' once or twice, but eventually 'I didn't quite get it in time' and it fell to the ground. It burst like a grenade, but not in the sort of impressive display I had expected; was like a water balloon made of glass. Sure, the glass could have hurt me, but the end result was just making the classroom into one big splash zone.

The teacher let out a satisfied sigh, a glimmer in her now cat-like eyes. "It fell so nicely~" When the class looked her way, she stiffened, trying to save face. "Miss Kirisame, that was very dangerous! If you were in tune with anything but," she shuddered, "water, someone could have gotten hurt!" Sighing at how little her look of questionable upset had on me, Orin pointed out, "Although, I suppose I'll just let you off with a warning this time. We do have another on hand, and they're not a particularly expensive tool, either." The way she was eyeing the shards made it seem more like she wanted it to happen, honestly. Like what little sorrow in her eyes was that it wasn't her that did it, and that I stole that from her.

Continuing off from after the discovery of my apparent talent, the next ball was passed around the room. Once it reached Unzan, it was unsurprising that the insides just looked like a thick fog, cloud or tornado or something. Wasn't even pink, which was a nice change from his garish mug. Other than that, nobody really stood out from the crowd. What I wasn't expecting, as I hadn't taken a close look at the syllabus as of yet, was that we actually had very little in the way of classes in general. Next was lunch, then magic stuff, followed by gym; that was literally everything today.

Not a single ordinary class in sight...

...Well, if I can get by without learning a whole lot of stuff I'll never need, I'm just fine with that! Obviously fittin' all that juicy know-how in my totally-not-human head comes first. Hoisting up my bag, I looked to Flan. "Sorry about the Sea World experi...ence?" I blinked, as she looked like she was in a bit of pain. "Flan? You okay?"

"I-I'm fine." The way she was shivering and squeezing her eyes shut wasn't concerning at all. Nope.

I knew she was lying; you can't con a con, especially not with a paper-thin excuse like that. "Y'know I can see right through that lie, right?" Someone who's fine doesn't look like they ate broken glass.

"I'm fine." She gave me a pout, though it wasn't like the ones from before; she actually looked truly upset. "I'm, umm... I'm gonna go change clothes." Like it was an afterthought, she added, "I'll see you later."

"Well, if ya say so." As she left, I was more than a little confused, as I knew something was up. Still, I knew how pretty girls could be when you get 'em mad, so I just let her be. With her gone, I walked on out of class, figuring I'd find Nitori back in the dorm. If I've got water at my fingertips, maybe she could give me a bit of a hand. While on my way outside, I felt like I took jell-o to the face, only to end up on my ass.
>> No. 64956
File 150972455495.jpg - (177.42KB, 600x600, Braaaains.jpg) [iqdb]
64956
Looking up, I saw something bouncy. Judging by how tall she was, I could easily guess why she had something approaching perpetual motion going for her; my face must have hit her just right.

Looking up the rest of the way, I found a pretty face, with long, red hair. "Whoa."

And then she giggled. It was probably the sexiest sound I'd ever heard. "Whoa?"

"Yeah," my eyes dipped back down, this time a bit further, "whoa."

And then she giggled again, obviously pleased. "If you're trying to make me blush, you're on the right track..." With that said, she offered a hand. "It's nice to meet you, Whoa."

I accepted it, of course; how could I not? "No, no; you're Whoa. I'm Ehh."

She tugged me to my feet, and I took the chance to dust off the back of my skirt. Smiling, she asked, "Indeed? I suppose I'll have to accept that title with pride, then, won't I? Although..." She gave me a pout. Not as cute as Flan's best, but certainly a contender for sexiest. "My eyes are up here." She tapped her finger on her nose.

"Yeah, but I'm busy lookin' elsewhere."

That got a giggle out of her. "Pervert. Still, I'd appreciate it if you did."

How could I say no to puppy eyes... like...

...that...?

— - — - —

[ ] I gotta get this icky water off! It buuuurns... I need a towel!
[ ] A nice hot bath should help get it off! Just gotta remember the herbal blend...
[ ] Maybe that air-drying thing in the bathroom will help? This is just too much; I can't bear the trip to the dorm...
[ ] Even fire burns less than this! Maybe if I try to set myself just a little on fire...? The seal should be weak right now, so I probably can... Maybe...
[ ] Write-in.
>> No. 64957
Erm... Does anyone know what actually happened here? Don't have a clue about what the votes are about.
>> No. 64958
File 150974670665.webm - (472.80KB, ALL HAIL THE HYPNO GIRL.webm) [iqdb]
64958
>>64957

You could say that we lost connection to the protagonist. I actually at first considered the vote being who we continue as for the next bit. I eventually figured that only two of the four options worked, and that simplicity would work best, sticking to just the one.

To put it simply, Flan PoV for the next few updates.

>> No. 64959
[X] Maybe that air-drying thing in the bathroom will help? This is just too much; I can't bear the trip to the dorm...

Best mental image.

>water affinity
something something making girls wet.
>> No. 64960
>[ ] I gotta get this icky water off! It buuuurns... I need a towel!

Most sensible option.

>[ ] A nice hot bath should help get it off! Just gotta remember the herbal blend...

I'm too wet! Must get wetter!

>[ ] Maybe that air-drying thing in the bathroom will help? This is just too much; I can't bear the trip to the dorm...

This sounds like it might lead to something bad. Or lewd.

>[ ] Even fire burns less than this! Maybe if I try to set myself just a little on fire...? The seal should be weak right now, so I probably can... Maybe...

Fire is always a fun option. However... Let's

[x] Be a big girl and just get some paper towels or toilet paper or something! Convenient option!
-[x] Then go make Marisa apologize! That big meanie! She makes you so... uuugh.
>> No. 64961
[x] I gotta get this icky water off! It buuuurns... I need a towel!
>> No. 64962
I've mulled it over a bit, and I'll just go to bed. I still will have four hours to post it if I do as such, and I do feel guilty breaking a tie. As such, I request my tie broken so that I may write when I wake up.

See you in almost 8 hours!
>> No. 64963
[x] I gotta get this icky water off! It buuuurns... I need a towel!

Fluffy~
>> No. 64964
>>64963

Thank you~
>> No. 64965
>>64958
BAD KOA!

[X] A nice hot bath should help get it off! Just gotta remember the herbal blend...


Fight water with... water?
>> No. 64966
File 150983044032.png - (115.69KB, 512x386, Why'd she have to get me wet.png) [iqdb]
64966
[8] I gotta get this icky water off! It buuuurns... I need a towel!

— - — - —

If Marisa thought I went too fast before, well... she probably would get mad at me for running as fast as I could. S-still, I had to; I was drenched! As such, I did my best to not hit anyone! ...I did my best, which didn't seem to be enough; I still was knocking people out of the way left and right as I headed for the dorm. B-but at least I slowed down for the stairs! So that nobody would get, erm... more hurt!

...I need to try harder next time.

Still, I did arrive in a timely manner, and proceeded to all but rip off my uniform, grabbing a towel. I gave it my all, and was more than a little thankful that I heal fast, as I think I gave myself a bit of a rug burn. ...I wish I could share my healing with Marisa, though; she still looks so hurt, after she saved me. Even after sleeping, she's been limping a little...

...I need to try harder to stay mad at her, however! No matter if it was my fault that she's hurt! She got my everything wet, and it hurt so much!

I almost wanted to take a nice bath to wash off the icky water, but a towel did the job fairly well, even if my scalp still burned. Still, I could at least wrap my hair up nice and thoroughly so that it didn't touch the rest of me, so there's that! At least I can feel happy at mostly succeeding at drying off, right? At least I did that right!

On the plus side, I didn't have to worry about my roommate being around; I never knew so much anger could fit in such a small girl... Something doesn't quite feel right. Sure, she's adorable when she gets heated up, but— Wait, who was that?

"...Hello?" I looked left, and I looked right, but there was nobody as near as the voice sounded.

...It must have been my imagination. Letting out a sigh, I started getting dressed, making sure that I did everything in the right order. Big sis would scold me if I didn't, though I might die from embarrassment long before that. Still, it was time to try and get the last of the water out of my hair, so I tugged the towel free, shaking it out a bit. When it hit the back of my neck, I shivered at the uncomfortable feeling, but at least it didn't burn too badly anymore. I could take pride in that, at least!

Heading for the bathroom, I carefully set about drying it with my hand, starting by wringing out what I could. I wish I hadn't forgotten my blow dryer, but at least I had a new one coming. With that done, I tried to light a flame on my finger tip, though let out a sigh when it wasn't working. The one time I want to set something on fire, and I can't seem to get it to work... Enough prattle; something isn't right. Half the school is wandering about as if under a spell.

There's that voice again... "Hello? Is anyone there?" Silence and solitude continued on. Well, that's a bit worrying. Still, it doesn't change the fact that I don't have a blow dryer, so I guess I'll have to bear my hair being like this. "Please do your best to dry off quickly, hair. I know you can do it, so fight hard, okay?" I gave my sidetail an encouraging smile, hoping it helped.

If only I had a seal that wasn't in my hair, this would be so much easier. I can still feel a little burning near it...

— - — - —

[ ] Go meet up with Marisa, like I said I would; it may be a bit early, but I can wait. Even if she got me wet, she's still cares.
[ ] Well... it's not quite lunch yet. Even if she's nice, she deserves to have to wait! ...Even if it hurts to make her lonely.
[ ] That odd voice did have a point... Maybe I should make sure Marisa's alright. Even if she's brave, she gets hurt so easily...
[ ] Just skip lunch! Be mad! Be upset! Marisa's a meanie! Even if she's really hard to hate! Even if she's so nice to me...
[ ] Sulk. Maybe Teddy needs a hug, too; at least she won't hurt me...
[ ] If I stick around, my roommate might show up. Maybe she'll know what to do; she seems good at being mad...
[ ] Write-in
>> No. 64967
[x] That odd voice did have a point... Maybe I should make sure Marisa's alright. Even if she's brave, she gets hurt so easily...
>> No. 64968
[x] Go meet up with Marisa, like I said I would; it may be a bit early, but I can wait. Even if she got me wet, she's still cares.

It was an accident!
>> No. 64969
[x] That odd voice did have a point... Maybe I should make sure Marisa's alright. Even if she's brave, she gets hurt so easily...

ALL ABOARD THE PLOT TRAIN
>> No. 64970
[X] If I stick around, my roommate might show up. Maybe she'll know what to do; she seems good at being mad...

Mad mentor... mad-tor.
>> No. 64971
[x] That odd voice did have a point... Maybe I should make sure Marisa's alright. Even if she's brave, she gets hurt so easily...
>> No. 64972
File 150989493015.jpg - (121.27KB, 850x816, Crocodile tears.jpg) [iqdb]
64972
[9] That odd voice did have a point... Maybe I should make sure Marisa's alright. Even if she's brave, she gets hurt so easily...

— - — - —

In the end, I guess I'm just not cut out for being mad. Not that I'm going to forgive her just like that, but... well, I'll go look for her at the least. I know it's not good to listen to weird voices in my head, so... maybe I'll call her an imaginary friend? Inner-voice works far better. Ohh! She responded! Still, only crazy people have inner voices.

...Hello?

Well... okay. Don't respond, I guess.

With my conversation over with, I grabbed my bag and headed on. I looked high, and I looked low, but Marisa wasn't anywhere to be found, and everywhere I went, every boy was shuffling about and muttering about their love, whoever that was. "Maybe if I just wait in the cafeteria..." With that said, I headed for the cafeteria, and grabbed lunch. The lunch lady was kind, and let me have an extra tomato juice. I wasn't sure what I did to deserve it, but I was happy that she felt I deserved it.

As I waited, I sucked on my juice, kicking my legs happily. It's so rare that people give me things, so I didn't notice when she sat down, but I heard Marisa clear her throat. "Heya, Flan!"

Marisa! Wait, no; I have to stay calm. I-it's not like I was worried or anything. No siree! No, it's not as if an ominous voice warned of worrying things.

Not at all...

I looked up with a smile, only to blink. There was a pretty girl in Marisa's arms, or at least as much as she could be, what with their differences in height. Prettier than even the prettiest girls I've seen as of this point, in fact! "Umm... H-hi!" I was nervous, to say the least. What if I had met them before and forgot who they were, or if I said something not-so-nice before I got this pretty ribbon of mine? Ohh, I'd hate for this to become awkward...

While this new friend of hers twiddled her fingers at me pleasantly, Marisa explained, "After you ran off like that, I really hit it off with Ko here." Well... at least her name will be easy to remember!

I tilted my head, finding myself curious. "You did?"

"Yup! Like two peas in a pod! Was love at first sight!"

L-love? Wow... "Did you get married...?"

Marisa blinked a few times, before blinking another couple, as if she just realized something. "...No."

This got a sour look out of Ko that wasn't acknowledged by Marisa. "Ohh? Then what are we, honey?"

Marisa let out a sigh, explaining, "In truth, we're..."

— - — - —

PoV reestablished!

[ ] "...already married! Have been since the start, even!" Let's make the psycho bitch think I'm still under her power. Gotta bide my time and all that.
[ ] "...getting some sorta shotgun wedding!" Well, it's pretty true! "Just kiddin'! As if." Maybe Flan'll get the message. Gotta trust people at some point, right? Maybe wink at her a few times on the side Ko isn't on.
[ ] "...both of fine taste in broom closets!" Make it awkward for her. Flan'll probably be spared the real message, assuming she's as innocent as she lets on, but that'll just make it funnier.
[ ] Kiss Ko. Distract her from the subject.
[ ] Punch Ko in the schnoz and book it. Looks like Flan gets a turn in being dragged. A bit more of a scene than I'd like, but if things go bad, at least people will know something is up.
[ ] Write-in.
>> No. 64973
[x] "...getting some sorta shotgun wedding!" Well, it's pretty true! "She's so eager she's dragging me to the altar!" Gotta make sure she thinks I'm still loyal. Maybe Flan'll get the message. Gotta trust people at some point, right? Maybe wink at her a few times on the side Ko isn't on.

Edited a bit to make it look like Marisa is still enspelled. And mostly picking just cuz I wanna see the scene where they try to ordain the wedding, and the shenanigans involved.

Bonus points if they actually do get married, or the wrong person gets married to the other wrong person. (Unzan to someone else, obviously)
>> No. 64974
...what the hell.

[x] >>64973
>> No. 64975
[x] "...getting some sorta shotgun wedding!" Well, it's pretty true! "Just kiddin'! As if." Maybe Flan'll get the message. Gotta trust people at some point, right? Maybe wink at her a few times on the side Ko isn't on.
>> No. 64976
[X] "...both of fine taste in broom closets!" Make it awkward for her. Flan'll probably be spared the real message, assuming she's as innocent as she lets on, but that'll just make it funnier.

This is the most amusing option. Therefore, it is the most correct.
>> No. 64977
[x] "...getting some sorta shotgun wedding!" Well, it's pretty true! "She's so eager she's dragging me to the altar!" Gotta make sure she thinks I'm still loyal. Maybe Flan'll get the message. Gotta trust people at some point, right? Maybe wink at her a few times on the side Ko isn't on.
>> No. 64978
[x] Punch Ko in the schnoz and book it. Looks like Flan gets a turn in being dragged. A bit more of a scene than I'd like, but if things go bad, at least people will know something is up.

Why exactly are we playing along? Deck her and run for it!
>> No. 64979
File 150998275592.jpg - (206.26KB, 896x716, What's on her mind.jpg) [iqdb]
64979
[10] "...getting some sorta shotgun wedding!" Well, it's pretty true! "She's so eager she's dragging me to the altar!" Gotta make sure she thinks I'm still loyal. Maybe Flan'll get the message. Gotta trust people at some point, right? Maybe wink at her a few times on the side Ko isn't on.

— - — - —

"...getting some sorta shotgun wedding!" I let out a chuckle at the way Ko shrunk just a bit out of the corner of my eye. "She's so eager she's dragging me to the altar! Isn't that right, honey?" I sent a big ol' grin her way, and got a look of confusion for my trouble. Little miss Mind Rape seemed unsure what to say to that, as if she couldn't tell if I were serious. Almost as if she barely knows me! Imagine that...

I used the opening as a chance to wink at Flandre a bit, making sure I was stealthy about it. Flan didn't seem to even think anything odd about it.

"Yes, I suppose I am a bit, darling..." She put on her best smile and best blush, but neither were fooling me; bitch is crazy, and that's putting it mildly. It's like she lives in a little bubble, and won't accept anything else but being the top of the food chain when she's just a guppy with a pretty face and a chest that could be generous if split between five girls, let alone one. "Still, isn't it time that we head to our next class?"

Flan gave her a pout, pointing out, "But you just got here..." While Ko was distracted with the overwhelming potency of a vampire's pout, I gave Flan a few more winks for good measure. Which went completely unnoticed. C'mon, Flan! Make with the complex deductions!

Time to make things uncomfortable for the lesser of the two redheads. "Yes, my love..." I was proud of the degree to which I hammed up the lovey dovey. If I didn't know better, even I'd buy it.

Had to stifle a grin at the way Ko blushed. Seems I still got a way with making girls blush... "...Wait. Hold on, Marisa." That smile she fixed on Flan didn't make me too comfortable, nor did the speed with which she shifted emotions. Had a sort of sinister look to it that'd look fitting on Unzan, let alone a pretty, if crazy, girl.

She was up to something, I just knew it.

— - — - —

[ ] That gives me an idea... If she wants me to hold on, I could get a little too obedient. Would it be helpful? Maybe. Would it be good payback? You bet your ass it would be!
[ ] Nah, she'd never buy it; just keep trusting in Flan. She'll notice eventually, right?
[ ] The schnoz is still an option. A very cathartic option, too! Can't imagine she's good at running, either.
[ ] Write-in

I'll try to make up for the size another time. Between a bit of writer's block and my head feeling all loosey goosey, I'm just wanting to lie down about now.
>> No. 64980
File 150999014791.jpg - (216.54KB, 900x667, geese with a lease.jpg) [iqdb]
64980
>my head feeling all loosey goosey

Hope you feel better soon, and manage to round up those geese. They can be rather vicious when provoked.

As for votes...

>Nah, she'd never buy it; just keep trusting in Flan. She'll notice eventually, right?

Yeah, something is going on right now. Can't afford to wait around.

>The schnoz is still an option. A very cathartic option, too! Can't imagine she's good at running, either.

Really tempting but, well, this feels like a trap option. Mostly because:

>Can't imagine she's good at running, either.

Feels like a trap. In anime, it's either an issue or it's a perpetual motion machine. And, considering this Ko is likely not!Kurumu (and a succubus either way) I'd put my money on it not being an inhibition. (Can't consider if she can fly or not, of course; not character knowledge).

So, best option I can find is:

[x] That gives me an idea... If she wants me to hold on, I could get a little too obedient. Would it be helpful? Maybe. Would it be good payback? You bet your ass it would be!

Distract, distract, wait for Flan to figure it out. Sometime. I was tempted to put in an option to get Flan to search for Nitori, but considering this Nitori, she'd just smug at us for a long time, and use it as an excuse to ship us out.

I mean, what's the worst case scenario? The mind-raping succubus falls for Marisa?
>> No. 64981
[x] The schnoz is still an option. A very cathartic option, too! Can't imagine she's good at running, either.

"In times of trouble, go with what you know." - Scorched Earth
>> No. 64982
>"In times of trouble, go with what you know." - Scorched Earth

And for a world-class crapomancer, I'd say that BS is her speciality.
>> No. 64983
[x] The schnoz is still an option. A very cathartic option, too! Can't imagine she's good at running, either.

Topple the apex, become the bitch queen!
>> No. 64984
[x] Nah, she'd never buy it; just keep trusting in Flan. She'll notice eventually, right?

And even if she doesn't, jealousy should finish the job.
>> No. 64985
[x] The schnoz is still an option. A very cathartic option, too! Can't imagine she's good at running, either.

Ohh, I am going to enjoy this~
>> No. 64986
File 151007248723.jpg - (252.11KB, 1280x768, Bloody but not on fire.jpg) [iqdb]
64986
[11] The schnoz is still an option. A very cathartic option, too! Can't imagine she's good at running, either.

— - — - —

"Yo, Ko. I've got something I need to tell ya. We gotta have a heart to hear. You and me? We're somethin' special. Like two peas in a pod. Two shakes of a tail feather or whatever." As I spoke, she was reaching critical distraction levels. The way she was getting red in the face, I was almost feeling a little bad at what I was gonna do. "We're like... a pair of socks. Y'know, like... really freakin' good socks. Nice and thick, toasty warm... Expensive socks made of goddamn wool. "

Almost.

Just as she began to smile I gently swung back my shoulder and used that space to swing forward, hammering her right in the nose. Flan gasped and Ko screamed in agony; pretty sure I heard a real satisfying crunch, so the bitch was well within her right to do so. While she was busy clutching her very bloody nose, I proceeded to take advantage of my position to knock her off her ass with a combination of kicking the back of her calves and sweeping her off the seat with my elbow. At my size, you gotta improvise.

Now satisfied I'm not gonna be followed too soon, I grabbed Flans hand. "We're going." Felt good to be the one dragging her for once. There's a lot of crap ways to spin being short, but my favorite part always was how easy it is to get muscle going, even if she made me look like I had noodle arms.

As I ran, Flan kept up easily, asking, "Why did you do that...? D-don't you love her??" When I looked over my shoulder, I wasn't sure if I could tell if she was horrified about me punching my abrupt fiance in the face like that, or if the bloodletting actually appealed. She was red in the face, but that could be for so many reasons.

"No. Never did, and I honestly can't see me and her together. The nutcase had a bone to pick with you, and was settling it by tryin' to steal me away."

Flan looked as shocked as she seemed hurt. "She did...? W-what did I do...?"

All I could do was shrug, answering, "Be more popular? She's got a killer body, but that personality explains why you're top dog."

"Wait." Flan pulled me to a halt. "I'm what??"

"Everyone likes you here."

"Then why do I only have one friend...?" She honestly looked a little hurt, which I couldn't help but answer with a wince. Well, more hurt.

By this point, we had escaped outside, the main doors a short way behind us. Looking left and looking right, I figured dragging Flan off into the woods would be a good idea, as I had this odd feeling my fellow zombies weren't gonna stay so dopey for long. Honestly wouldn't be surprised if they came sprinting our way, out for blood. Women like her didn't take rejection well; I didn't need to be some sorta expert in love to tell that. She didn't get her way, so she hijacked the male population of the school. Ignoring Unzan, anyways. Because, seriously, who would want that? ...And for some reason including me. Seriously, how does that even work? Was it because I go both ways? She got some kinda sexth sense?

When I felt we had a good place to stop, I let out a sigh and leaned against the great stone wall of the school. "Think we'll be safe here." When Flan joined me, the way she found her shoes to be the most interesting thing in the world tipped me off to her being down. "What's wrong, Flan?"

She let out a sigh. "Just doesn't feel like everyone likes me... First there was that mean bearded guy, and now there's this weird pretty girl. And there's all those people whispering about me behind my back, too... It's like they just want to talk about me, not be my friend..." She fell to her butt, hugging her knees. "I'd like friends... You're the first one I've ever even had..." She sniffled pitifully, and I couldn't help but sigh.

In the short time I've known the girl, it's felt like her default setting was bubbly, but maybe the bubbly was my fault. ...Maybe her real default setting was actually more along the lines of kicked puppy. "Flan..." She gave me a sideways glance from down in the dumps, her lower lip quivering.

— - — - —

[ ] "Truth is, I've only ever had one friend. One real friend." Sure, I've had cronies, flunkies, minions and muscle over the years, but they were all superficial at best. Just wanted to ride my rep.
[ ] "Do you really need more than that?" Can't go and say things you can't guarantee, right? I'll just have to be a clique of one, no matter how corny and/or insane that might turn out.
[ ] "I have a friend I think you might get along with." Nitori's a good friend, if as much of an ass as I am. If Flan can get along with me, surely they'll get along swimmingly. ...Heh. Swimmingly.
[ ] "I'll see what I can do." Am I promising too much? Maybe, maybe. But it's hard to not want to, when it comes to a girl like Flan. She could sink a thousand ships, or whatever the saying was.
[ ] Just hug it out. Reminds me of Nitori when she was younger, and that always helped.
[ ] Write-in.
>> No. 64987
The site seems to be working again!
>> No. 64988
[x] "I have a friend I think you might get along with." Nitori's a good friend, if as much of an ass as I am. If Flan can get along with me, surely they'll get along swimmingly. ...Heh. Swimmingly.

Pun option best option.
>> No. 64989
[x] "I have a friend I think you might get along with." Nitori's a good friend, if as much of an ass as I am. If Flan can get along with me, surely they'll get along swimmingly. ...Heh. Swimmingly.

Pull no punches. That sounded funnier in my head.

>>64987

Did I miss something?
>> No. 64990
[X] "I have a friend I think you might get along with." Nitori's a good friend, if as much of an ass as I am. If Flan can get along with me, surely they'll get along swimmingly. ...Heh. Swimmingly.

> She could sink a thousand ships, or whatever the saying was.

While we know the actual meaning is something else, the literal meaning is still correct considering who Flandre is.

>>64989
Site probably ate the update or something.
>> No. 64991
[x] "I have a friend I think you might get along with." Nitori's a good friend, if as much of an ass as I am. If Flan can get along with me, surely they'll get along swimmingly. ...Heh. Swimmingly.

We can literally double your friend count in just one easy step!
>> No. 64992
[x] "I have a friend I think you might get along with." Nitori's a good friend, if as much of an ass as I am. If Flan can get along with me, surely they'll get along swimmingly. ...Heh. Swimmingly.

I don't see why a spirit of rivers (hint: rivers flow) wouldn't get along with a vampire.

> "Do you really need more than that?"
Let's not make her go insane/possessive mode.
>> No. 64993
[x] "I have a friend I think you might get along with." Nitori's a good friend, if as much of an ass as I am. If Flan can get along with me, surely they'll get along swimmingly. ...Heh. Swimmingly.

Fairly unanimous! Seems the little butt burglar is to your liking.
>> No. 64994
File 151015719842.jpg - (414.47KB, 850x1206, You startled the bitch.jpg) [iqdb]
64994
[12] "I have a friend I think you might get along with." Nitori's a good friend, if as much of an ass as I am. If Flan can get along with me, surely they'll get along swimmingly. ...Heh. Swimmingly.

— - — - —

I slipped my arm around her shoulder, continuing, "...I think I know someone who you might like."

She looked up at me with big, wet eyes. "Really...?"

Gave her my most reassuring smile. Grade-A reassurance, or her money back. "Really." Not that she paid for it or anything, but if she did? Full refund. "She's a weirdo and a butthead, but she's a good girl deep down." Honestly probably why I only got along with her and nobody else; she's got as much ass in her as I do in me, but she's not got a mean bone in her body. She's snarky, she's rude and she could probably do with at least twice as many showers, but she's a good girl.

Although, maybe that stink of hers is less to do with bathing and more to do with natural musk. If so, may god have mercy on the poor sap that ends up with her.

Flan gave a nod. "You think we'd get along...?"

The question made me let out a snort. "Honestly? No." While she went back to putting her forehead on her knees, I added, "But, at the same time, I'd say even worse about you getting along with me." In the end, our friendship works against all reason. Maybe she's got a high tolerance for a crass ol' thing like me, or maybe I have a high tolerance for airheads. "Either way, it works, right? It's why I think you two could be friends, even if I just as easily could see ya getting along like a cat and a big tub of water."

She shuddered, muttering, "I hate water..."

Alright. Enough's enough. "So... what's all this hubbub about water?" Can't exactly beat around this bush forever; I may suck at math, but 2+2 is well within my capabilities. The way she acted after I drenched her, and now this? Was obvious she wasn't much a fan.

Flan let out a sigh, saying, "Sorry I got mad earlier... I just..." She sighed again. She'll be an old woman soon at this rate. "I just... vampires really hate water. Just touching the stuff hurts us for the same reason we're so strong... Umm..." She tapped her lip a bit, before saying, "Ahh! You know how a toaster dropped in a bathtub isn't a good idea?" When I nodded, she continued, "Imagine if I were a toaster."

...My god[i] is that a cute toaster.

Wait, wait... She smells like shampoo last I remember. "You don't bathe?"

"N-no, I do! I just, umm... I need to make sure it's not [i]pure
water... They make special herbal pouches for vampires. There's nothing too potent in them, but they do the trick. My nose is, erm..." She averted her eyes from me. "Really strong, so I can't deal with strong smells too well, either."

"You sayin' I stink or something?" Looking away while saying that? Couldn't even

"N-no! No, no, I'm not! I'm just... you know..." She trailed off, leaving me to guess.

"...No, I don't, actually." Just spit it out.

"I'm a vampire... I, umm... I can smell your wounds is all."

"...Ohh." Well, I'm not exactly sure how to feel about that. Not that I had time to, as I was more than a little surprised when a bucket ofwater was dumped down on us from above. The moment it hit us, Flan all but screaming in pain while I simply shook out my hair and stood, looking up to see a certain redhead sporting a bit of extra red.

"You hubiwiaded be... You bwoke by dose..." Little miss psycho stood on the window sill, looking all vindictive and panties down at us. "I thoughd you wiked be... Thoughd you wiked being awound be..." She balled up her fists, tears in her eyes. She was trembling a bit. "Thoud you wanded do be bine...! Foweva! Bud you didn't... You hade be!"

And then her nails went snikt, shooting out to a foot long. Kinda bumped her cool points up a couple notches, but she's still no Wolverine.

"I'b going do fugging kiww you...!"

— - — - —

[ ] Yeah, she's serious. Better...
-[ ] Run. Flan's in no position to be fighting, and she's a sitting duck.
-[ ] Wind up your leg and catch her when she jumps down. You got this.
[ ] "What was that? Couldn't understand a thing you said!" Get her riled up. Maybe that'll give Flan a chance to recover a little?
[ ] Mock how she sounds with the tissue in her nose. Maybe if you upset her enough, she'll leave you alone
[ ] Yoink the seal. Seriously, just do it and hope. Got a bad feeling about this.





[ ] Sometimes you gotta admit you're wrong. Maybe I acted a bit rashly, maybe I didn't. Still don't like her, but breaking her nose might have been a step too far.
>> No. 64996
> "You humiliated me... You broke my nose..." Little miss psycho stood on the window sill, looking all vindictive and panties down at us. "I thought you liked me... Thought you liked being around me..." She balled up her fists, tears in her eyes. She was trembling a bit. "Thought you wanted to be mine...! Forever! But you didn't... You hate me!"

> "I'm going to fucking kill you...!"

Translated Koa's little vindictive speech from Bloody Nose to English.
>> No. 64998
[x] "Uh, you do realize you were mind controlling me, right? That ain't love. Of course I'm going to sock ya and run the minute I break free."

Seems like she genuinely might not understand what she was doing.
>> No. 64999
[X] Sometimes you gotta admit you're wrong. Maybe I acted a bit rashly, maybe I didn't. Still don't like her, but breaking her nose might have been a step too far.[
-[X] "That said, Uh, you do realize you were mind controlling me, right? That ain't love. Of course I'm going to sock ya and run the minute I break free."

Oh fuck. If that was unconscious then we fucked up BIG TIME>
>> No. 65000
>Oh fuck. If that was unconscious then we fucked up BIG TIME

And this is why we shouldn't dual spec between brawling and crapomancy! Everyone knows minmax is the way to go, after all.

That said, let's use our special combination of bargaining and bsing to plead our way out of things. Of course, keep the trump card around...

[x] Sometimes you gotta admit you're wrong. Maybe I acted a bit rashly, maybe I didn't. Still don't like her, but breaking her nose might have been a step too far.
-[x] "That said, Uh, you do realize you were mind controlling me, right? That ain't love. Of course I'm going to sock ya and run the minute I break free."
-[x] Prepare to yoink the seal in case your insides are about to be rearranged.
>> No. 65001
[X] "What was that? Couldn't understand a thing you said!" Get her riled up. Maybe that'll give Flan a chance to recover a little?

>diplomacy with devils
>ever

Play its shattered pride for time.
>> No. 65003
[X] Sometimes you gotta admit you're wrong. Maybe I acted a bit rashly, maybe I didn't. Still don't like her, but breaking her nose might have been a step too far.
-[X] "That said, Uh, you do realize you were mind controlling me, right? That ain't love. Of course I'm going to sock ya and run the minute I break free."

Let it not be said that Marisa is completely unreasonable.
>> No. 65006
[X] Sometimes you gotta admit you're wrong. Maybe I acted a bit rashly, maybe I didn't. Still don't like her, but breaking her nose might have been a step too far.[
-[X] "That said, Uh, you do realize you were mind controlling me, right? That ain't love. Of course I'm going to sock ya and run the minute I break free."
- [X] Be ready to run like hell if she jumps
>> No. 65010
File 151023173657.jpg - (88.15KB, 800x1011, Hard act to follow.jpg) [iqdb]
65010
[13] Sometimes you gotta admit you're wrong. Maybe I acted a bit rashly, maybe I didn't. Still don't like her, but breaking her nose might have been a step too far.[
-[13] "That said, Uh, you do realize you were mind controlling me, right? That ain't love. Of course I'm going to sock ya and run the minute I break free."

— - — - —

Just as she's making like a coiled spring, I called out, "I'm sorry."

She blinked, stopping. "You're... sorry?" Hey, she actually didn't sound like a thug that time.

"Yeah. I am. Sorry I broke your nose, anyways." The anger returned in her face, and I quickly added, "You kidding me? Y'know you were mindrapin' me, right?"

She gave me a glare. "You were by destined one... You... you were supposed to be bine, and I yours, with one kiss to seal the deal!"

I let out a snort. Sounding pretty one-dimensional about now, isn't she? "If you can't get why I socked you, then you don't deserve me. " When she looked about ready to blow her top, I added, "Want me as a lover, ya gotta treat me as an equal, not a slave." Not having half the school as boyfriends might help as well, of course.

"Judt shud up!"

— - — - —

Anything to add before things get hairy?

[ ] Write-in
[ ] No.

It felt like you guys might, so I figured I'd give the choice. Need sleep, so an excuse for laziness is appreciated.
>> No. 65013
>>65010
Damn, she's out of it. One last try before feces hit the rapidly spinning blades.

[x] Look: why don't we start over, as friends? If we're destined then you wouldn't mind waiting a bit, right? I would like that and if you really want to be with me you should care about that.

FRIENDS MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER.
>> No. 65017
[X] No.

I'd really rather not make a habit of being sweet on a delusional, self-centered, mind raping demon - but that's just me.
>> No. 65018
[x] No.

How the fuck did I forget to read the last update. Sage for shame.
>> No. 65019
>>65013
>>65017

Well, these votes seem quite unrelated! Or perhaps they relate in an unexpected way... Let's see how Marisa feels on the matter to break this tie!

>>65018

Ohh! Got a new vote while forgetting to call! This will be easier to work with~ Thank you!
>> No. 65020
File 151032939543.jpg - (54.50KB, 338x500, Sometimes you gotta punt.jpg) [iqdb]
65020
[14] No.

— - — - —

A bitch like this is one ya can't just let off lightly. You tried; you really did. There's a lot that can be said about Marisa Kirisame. Lotta it'd probably be completely rife with lies, but I'm willing to give second chances if they care. I can forgive a bitch, and I can forgive a bitch-and-a-half. Even a double bitch is well within my 'I'm not gonna cave your teeth in' range. But this bitch, here and now, just pissed on my bridge. Ain't nobody pissing on and burning my bridge.

So, I did the most reasonable action, given the circumstance. Y'see, Nitori was never a sporty kinda girl. Never liked gym, unless it involved swimming, and just liked to watch. Me, though? I liked me a bit of soccer. Kickin' around balls was somethin' I could get. Simple. Good for ya.

And, as it turns out, surprisingly helpful these days. After all, I just loved to do showy little tricks for the butt thief. Bounced it on my head, juggled it with my feet. You name a trick, and I just loved to try and do it way back then. Gave me strong legs. Gave me good stamina for running. Stamina for draggin' upset vampires, too, apparently.

But — and here's where it'd be helpful about now — I always couldn't quite pull off a certain trick. That flippy kick, when you hit it while upside down. Normally, that might not be such a useful thing to do, but today?

Today I was gonna do it, and there weren't any balls in sight...

The action I did was to put my all in jumping as high as I could. Before she could try and do anything that I'd imagine would bisect me. Element of surprise was my aim, and I had it. My jump was good, but she grazed the ends of my hair. Her swing missed me, though, which was what was important. Missed me by a hair, you could say. Still, as an inch of hair scattered to the wind, my foot did the deed I wanted doing. Yearned to do, even.

I wanted to give her what she deserved. What Unzan deserved, and got, she got just as hard, if mid-dive. And the sound of her pain was just... satisfying. The sound of her scream as my foot connected with that most sensitive of places. Guys always think we're immune to this crap, as if they have some big ol' achilles heel in their pants. Truth be told? Crushin' what we have against the bone right under it doesn't feel that great either.

The main issue after that, however, was the landing. I'd never been able to stick it or kick it. Today, I managed the latter, but the former remained to prove my undoing. She landed first, with a grunt and a roll, and I soon followed her act up my own little face-plant of a heap. But, honestly, I felt I was the victor of the Pain Awards. Didn't just get punted, after all. Also didn't just jump out a two-story window like an idiot. Always gonna be a bad day when you forget you have wings, not that I'd ever had an issue like that. Or, well... wings. Still, if I did, I'd totally not lose to a weak little earthbound gal like me.

"A-are you okay, Marisa...?" I blew the skirt out of my eyes, and found that Flan was blushing at the position I'd fallen in. Guess that secret's outta the skirt, huh? Girl knows I like frilly little things. Might have to kill her if she blabs.

"Yeah. Nothin' I'm not used to." Let's see... Legs behind me, so... kick forward and push off? I gave it a try, and ending up kneeling. Was real happy at the way I did such a basic task as standing, and gave Flan a grin for having to bear witness to the horror that is panties. "Sorry 'bout flashin' ya, though."

She shook her head, her sidetail flailing about a bit as she did. "N-no, it's, umm... it's fine. ...B-but, umm... if you're okay, I need to go change. This hurts a lot..." She picked at her drenched outfit. "And, umm... Thanks for not taking off my seal. That would probably have hurt more..."

"Ohh?" Miss wounded ego finally rose from, as Flan might put it, 'knowing her place'. Which was to say the dirt she ate. "Den you'we compwedewy hewpwess, awen't you? Den I can get do by wevenge..." Didn't like that crazy look in her eye one bit. Not that I was looking too deep into the matter, what with the hypnotism crap she pulled earlier.

I stood up in front of Flan, shielding her from the threat. Or, at least, the lower half of her. If Batty over here went for, say, the chest? Nooot much my little human shield act would have done; I was no tower shield. Was more a kite shield, and even that was generous. "You want her, ya gotta get through me first..."

Ko threw back her head and let out a twisted little giggle. "Ohh, I was pwanning do whedder you asked or not..." She held up her fingers threateningly. "Afta aww, what couwd you possibwy do ta be?"

"I'm a witch, y'know! If ya keep it up, I'll curse ya somethin' fierce!" Okay, this isn't lookin' too good. If this keeps up, she just might make good on her words...

Didn't like that sneer one bit... "You? A witch? Don'd bake be waugh. You'we judt a—" Just when I thought she was going to out me, she was interrupted.
>> No. 65021
File 15103304051.jpg - (66.95KB, 450x617, Seriously where did she come from.jpg) [iqdb]
65021
"There are a great many things she could do to you, I assure you." The three of us blinked, looking to the newcomer with a crazy amount of hair. Was purple, too; pretty crazy color, if I had to say. "That threat of curse is indeed quite a potent threat." She took a breath. "They do linger for centuries, when applied by a proper magician." She held up a finger, taking another. "However, while the sort of affliction that lingers, it is hardly such a deadly thing." She took yet another. Maybe I should count them. "Now, a hex, on the other hand, is a more pressing matter." ...Four? Was that the fourth? "For what they lose in duration, they make up for in potency." Asthma, if I had to guess. You'd think she'd have an inhaler, though. ...Ahh. Five. "However—"

"Who da heww aww—"

"I am Patchouli Knowledge, familiar." Familiar? What's that? Like a witch's cat? ...Right. Six. "Do not try my patience, for it wears thin as quickly as your beauty does when it rains; be silent, now, lest—"

"Lest you whu—"

"Be silent." That bout of intimidation was punctuated by a coughing fit.

Ko was silent, however. Had me snickering.

"A-as... I was saying..." She cleared her voice, continuing, "However, there is another, far more instantaneous method I, for one, am far more keen on." Seven. ...Or was that eight? "Configuration, incineration, petrification, obliteration; so many methods at her disposal, and that is but a taste of her options. The options of a witch. The options of a magician, if to be more accurate." Eight, nine, ten... "If you... thought that such a thing... as that..." Eleven, twelve. "A-as that simple kick was so great a threat, you should not push her further."

Ko was dumbfounded. Flan was confused. Me? Well, I was just kinda thinking that she rolled a 20 on her bluff, as Nitori might say. Buttmunch always did have a thing for D&D.

Cutting her eyes from Ko to myself, she said, "We meet in the library after school. Be there." With that said, she just... walked off. Not waiting for my answer, even. "Come, familiar."

Ko began walking after her. "I'b dot your— Wait, when did I... H-hey, sd-sdop?!"

And, just like that, we were left alone. ...Well, that was a thing.

And then the bell tower rung. ...Welp. ...We're gonna be late for our classes.

— - — - —

[ ] Just skip magic class. I can't imagine this going well.
-[ ] Guess I should see Flan to her room. She helped me when I was hurt, so now it's my turn. Kinda made a mess of myself anyways; bloody knuckles and dirty clothes never end well when late. Can take a quick shower afterwards.
-[ ] Guess I'll just... go back to my room for a nice shower. A tomboy I may be, but even I like a shower sometimes. Feel kinda dirty after having her in my head like that. Wasn't a good feeling, losing my free will.
-[ ] Free Ko Yeah, no. Beansprout's in better with me right now after that stunt. She could use a taste of her own medicine, if what was just going down was any indication.
[ ] Better hurry up; I can wash my knuckles on the way to class. Maybe this way I can at least learn what it is to say I can totally do. Aside from that asthmariffic monologue Patchouli had, anyways.
[ ] Write-in.

I feel regret that I only recently realized a much better way to have handled the mind control. Ahh well. Nothing I can do for it.
>> No. 65022
[X] Better hurry up; I can wash my knuckles on the way to class. Maybe this way I can at least learn what it is to say I can totally do. Aside from that asthmariffic monologue Patchouli had, anyways.

Can't be late for flunking magic class, now can we?

And I'm guessing Patchy already knows that Marisa isn't a real witch.
>> No. 65024
[x] Just skip magic class. I can't imagine this going well.
-[x] Guess I should see Flan to her room. She helped me when I was hurt, so now it's my turn. Kinda made a mess of myself anyways; bloody knuckles and dirty clothes never end well when late. Can take a quick shower afterwards.

Assuming Patchy does right through Marisa's crapomancy, we're probably better off talking to her than bumbling around in front of the entire class.

Plus being gentlemanly (gentlewomanly?) to the vampire we drenched (twice) is totally a good excuse.
>> No. 65025
[x] Just skip magic class. I can't imagine this going well.
-[x] Guess I should see Flan to her room. She helped me when I was hurt, so now it's my turn. Kinda made a mess of myself anyways; bloody knuckles and dirty clothes never end well when late. Can take a quick shower afterwards.
>> No. 65026
>Ko began walking after her. "I'b dot your— Wait, when did I... H-hey, sd-sdop?!"

so, was she just bound by Patchouli out of the blue? Do feel a bit sorry for her; as what she did to Marisa was wrong doesn't make it any better when done to her.

And, if Patchy did bind her out of nowhere, it makes me wonder just how competent she is. She's one to be careful about.

Vote wise...

[x] Just skip magic class. I can't imagine this going well.
-[x] Guess I should see Flan to her room. She helped me when I was hurt, so now it's my turn. Kinda made a mess of myself anyways; bloody knuckles and dirty clothes never end well when late. Can take a quick shower afterwards.

We do have the excuse here that Flan would back us up on. And, as she's apparently so popular, she should be able to get us off without any trouble. (And if not, well, something like this happening on first day, while not ideal, does allow her to establish a close friendship, which is what a boarding school tries to encourage).
>> No. 65027
[x] Just skip magic class. I can't imagine this going well.
-[x] Guess I should see Flan to her room. She helped me when I was hurt, so now it's my turn. Kinda made a mess of myself anyways; bloody knuckles and dirty clothes never end well when late. Can take a quick shower afterwards.

>Cutting her eyes from Ko to myself, she said, "We meet in the library after school. Be there."
Best start formulating the excuses now.
>> No. 65028
[x] Just skip magic class. I can't imagine this going well.
-[x] Guess I should see Flan to her room. She helped me when I was hurt, so now it's my turn. Kinda made a mess of myself anyways; bloody knuckles and dirty clothes never end well when late. Can take a quick shower afterwards.
>> No. 65029
File 151041807152.gif - (84.75KB, 319x300, Pretend she's delicious.gif) [iqdb]
65029
[15] Just skip magic class. I can't imagine this going well.
-[15] Guess I should see Flan to her room. She helped me when I was hurt, so now it's my turn. Kinda made a mess of myself anyways; bloody knuckles and dirty clothes never end well when late. Can take a quick shower afterwards.

— - — - —

No way I can make it to class like this. Besides, if Cousin It had plans for what I thought, might be for the best to skip out on it anyways."Lemme help ya back to your room, Flan." She looked at me oddly, and I eventually asked, "What? Gotta make up for earlier, right? I got you all wet, so I gotta make amends." She still looks like she wants to scream about now, as red in the face as she was. ...Or maybe it was like a sunburn? ...Now that I think of it, how is she even going to school? SPF kajillion or somethin'?

"But... you'll be late for class...?" Ahh, good ol' Flan. Believes in me not bein' a bad sorta girl even after the third time I had to kick someone outta my way. She'd learn with time that she should be impressed when I bother. ...Even if the classes might actually be helpful for a change.

"Flan, do I look like I wanna be on time right now?" I held up my still bloodied hand and tugged at my drenched, dirt-stained uniform.

"Ahh!" She eyed my hand. "I could clean it for—"

"No." I can't fault her for trying, but heck no.

"Aww..." I don't need bloodloss on my list of problems. Didn't even know that could actually happen.

"Was bad enough havin' you lick my knee. Kinda lost lickin' permission when you tried my nose on for size, too." At the way she drooped, I added, "'Sides, even if you went and did that, she really drenched the both of us good; if I went to class like this, I'd be kicked right back out."

She let out a sigh, finally admitting defeat. "Okay..."

"Now, c'mon." I offered her a hand, which she timidly took, as if I was going to bite. Me. Bite her. Pretty funny, when I thought about it. With that, we were off for the dorms. As I thought, she wasn't quite walking like someone does when at 100%, leaning on me just a bit by the mid-way point. Wasn't even a long trip, all things considered; we were already outside the building. "Flan, you know I could probably carry ya if I had to, right? Lean as much as you want." Wasn't even sure if I was bluffing there; girl's probably pretty light.

With that said, she leaned on me, and I wrapped my arm around her waist to steady her. We arrived at her room not much later, and I helped her to the bed. "Thanks, Marisa. Just tired after all the water today..."

She then proceeded to roll around on the bed, and damn if it wasn't adorable.

"You need anything?" I gave her a bemused smirk, finding it funny when she popped back up. Seems getting just a little dryer helped a ton.

Although, I just kinda snickered when her side tail slapped her in the face while she shook her head. You'd think she'd know better, or at least be used to it, but apparently not. "Owwww..." And then she shook it off, where it then tried to circle around to get her. But this time, she was ready, as she blocked the hit.

That'd probably look a lot less sad if she weren't pouting so hard.

— - — - —

[ ] Look for a towel. She could probably use one.
[ ] Tease her. She's always cute when I get her riled up.
[ ] Give her a pep talk. She's about to go mono eh mono with the world heavyweight hairstyle, so she's gonna need it.
[ ] Get going. As innocent as she's acted, I'd not be surprised if she just started undressing here and now.
-[ ] Which is why you'll stay. Yeah, not happening.
[ ] Write-in.
>> No. 65030
[x] Tease her. She's always cute when I get her riled up.

Flan option.
>> No. 65031
[X] Better hurry up; I can wash my knuckles on the way to class. Maybe this way I can at least learn what it is to say I can totally do. Aside from that asthmariffic monologue Patchouli had, anyways.

Has she ever considered the possibility of actually learning magic? She has to know she has a water afinity at least.
>> No. 65032
[x] Look for a towel. She could probably use one.
[X] Give her a pep talk. She's about to go mano a mano with the world heavyweight hairstyle, so she's gonna need it.
>> No. 65033
[x] Look for a towel. She could probably use one.

>>65031

slowpoke.jpg
>> No. 65034
File 151050692589.jpg - (43.95KB, 400x300, Flower shower power.jpg) [iqdb]
65034
[16] Look for a towel. She could probably use one.

— - — - —

Leaving Flan to her thing, I peeked into the bathroom. Huh. Smells weirdly... floral, for lack of a better word. Must be that stuff she dumps in the bath. Yoinking up a the towel, I headed back out, flinging it to her. She, of course, yelped. Big ol' scaredy cat, isn't she? "Here ya go. Have a towel." Chuckling when she peeked out from under it, I continued, "Anyways, I need to go take a shower. Gotta be ready for gym."

As I waved over my shoulder on the way out, she said, "Ahh! We could share."

"...What?" I peeked back over at her, wondering why she'd ever say that.

"Share the bath, silly!"

"Ain't happening." Fastest way to feel like a creep is to get naked in tight quarters. At my height, she'd probably poke my eye out, too. Kiiinda need those.

"But why?" Why, she says...

"Because that's not something you do with other people." When Flan tilted her head, I explained, "We'd be practically hugging." She stared at me cluelessly. "And naked."

"...Yeah? Isn't being naked normal while bathing...?"

Well, she has a point there, but the point's still got one leg to stand on. "And you don't see any problems there?" Airhead or innocent, I wasn't sure; all I knew was that she needed to be taught better. "Look, you know about the birds and the bees?"

"You mean how a man and a woman make a baby?"

"Yeah, that."

"Yeah, I do!" She looked weirdly proud of herself over that. "First the man needs to get an erection, and—"

"Good." I wasn't wanting a refresher, but at least she was enthusiastic, if nothing else. "Well, sometimes there's also birds and birds, and sometimes bees and bees." She just tilted her head, making me pinch my nose. Which was which, anyways? Maybe... bees being guys? I mean, there's the stinger after all. "Sometimes birds like to ruffle each other's feathers, even if it's not going to go anywhere. And, well..." I let out a sigh, noticing that it just wasn't sticking. "...You don't get it, do you?"

"Erm... No?"

Yeah, that's not going anywhere. "Just don't cram yourself close to anyone while naked, okay? Tends to be a bad idea."

She let out a sigh. "Well, okay...? Not like you're a boy, though...?"

With that said, I headed back to my room to shower, feeling a headache coming on. Seriously, Flan's so clueless sometimes that it freakin' hurts. That said, I guess I had to take one of my own. Didn't have time to linger, though I did make sure to scrub my punching hand extra good. Didn't want any urges to clean me up one way or another if it turned out there was a bloodsucker in my class. Thankfully turtle butt wasn't in the shower, as it'd suck to get hypocritical so soon. 'Sides, it'd probably be a bad idea for new and exciting reasons I really didn't wanna experience.

All dressed up, I was off to gym. Felt silly putting on new clothes this late in the day, but mine were real drenched. Feel like I was spinning my wheels a bit, though, what with how I'd end up in dire need of yet another shower. Three in one day's makin' me feel a bit like a clean freak, even if they were all justified.

Ahh well, what can ya do? Just gotta head out there and do what I do best. ...Well, with how things are, I might be second fiddle. Still, I had to do all that which I did best, regardless of that.

Hopefully it's nothing too bad. What are the odds it'd be dodgeball or something? Pretty low, that's what!

To be continued tomorrow...

— - — - —

Well, I feel a bit like I'm evading writing with this, but this isn't gonna be a short update, and I'm fairly pooped. Sorry about the lack of a vote today!
>> No. 65035
>>65034
An update is still an update. I appreciate the effort!
>> No. 65036
>>65035

Thanks. Appreciate it.
>> No. 65037
> What are the odds it'd be dodgeball or something? Pretty low, that's what!

It's going to be some sort of super-dodgeball, isn't it.
>> No. 65038
File 151059452396.jpg - (313.88KB, 850x1235, Who smiles when saying that.jpg) [iqdb]
65038
The moment I saw the rack of balls, I was groaning inside; big and red things like that could only be one thing: dodgeballs. When I saw Nitori, though, I was pleased. Meant a familiar face, and someone I could totally see using as a human shield. Not like she tends to try to dodge the things anyways, right? Heck, could take advantage of the easy target even if she wasn't; waste not want not and all that. Either way, I still win out! "Heya, Nitori." Gave her my best grin and my second best wave. Can't always be givin' out the good stuff, can I?

When she saw me, she just let out a longsuffering sigh. "Hey, Marisa. Gonna ping balls off my face some more?"

I couldn't help but chuckle. "Hey, you know I didn't mean to do that." Meant to ping it off her shoulder, but sadly her face had other plans. Lot can be said about me, but throwing awkwardly big balls isn't a skill I possess. Hands don't much like it; small was a good word to describe them.

"You keep saying that, but I keep having to duck." Well, stop sitting still.

"If it helps, you took it like a pro." Or, so I assumed. Never much was interested in that kinda porn.

"Thanks...?" Whoosh! Clearing away her confused blush and throat in one masterstroke, she deadpanned, "But still, don't do it again."

"Nitori, baby, honey, gal, do you think I wanna mess that pretty little face up?" Did I say that was my best grin? Well, I had somethin' extra special hidden away just for this sorta moment. Wasn't easy getting my hands on this shiteating grin, but Nitori deserved it.

Aaaand the blush was back. Heh. "S-stop that! You're just trying to change the subject like you always do." Man, I forgot just how well she knew me! Ahh well, was worth a shot.

"Tsk, tsk... Always seein' the worst in people." Even if she's always right, at least when it comes to me.

When she rolled her eyes and was about ready to retort, the teacher chose that moment to let herself be known. "Good afternoon, children! Ready to work up a sweat?" Her volume was enough to get everyone's attention, and she wasn't the type to lose it any time soon, judging by the size of those sweater puppies; half the guys were still struggling to reset their traps. Let's just say that her track suit probably could stand to be a size bigger and leave it at that. "Now, I know that you all must be simply bursting with repressed energy, so I will be quick so that we might begin class. I am Byakuren Hijiri, and I am your gym teacher. I hope that we can get along, and hope that you will still remain friends even after you've mercilessly driven the opposing team into the dirt." Somethin' not right about saying that with a smile, but she sure did it. ...Wasn't sure if it was scary or kinda sexy, though.

With that said, she exclaimed, "With introductions out of the way, I think it's time that we begin! However, we shall need team captains. As such, who here thinks they are capable of leadership? Of leading their men through hell and back? Who here thinks themselves capable of that difficult path few take?!"

— - — - —

[ ] Raise your hand. I wanna be able to pick who I'm accidentally hitting in the face.
[ ] Raise Nitori's hand. Gotta tease her somehow. Not quite hit the legal minimum as of yet.
[ ] Raise both of your hands. Always fun to smack the girl around when you get the chance. All in good fun, right?
[ ] Ehh. They can pick whatever they like; bein' put on the spot like this just isn't me.
>> No. 65039
[x] Raise your hand. I wanna be able to pick who I'm accidentally hitting in the face.

It's not like this will be any different than common school dodgeball, right? Right..?
>> No. 65040
[X] Raise your hand. I wanna be able to pick who I'm accidentally hitting in the face.
Look at it like this, if we're team captain then the others aren't going to expect us to be the MVP of ball throwing. Plus if patchy is watching she can see how a real crapomancer has physical capabilities beyond coughing in someone's general direction.
>> No. 65041
[x] Raise Nitori's hand. Gotta tease her somehow. Not quite hit the legal minimum as of yet.
>> No. 65042
[x] Raise Nitori's hand. Gotta tease her somehow. Not quite hit the legal minimum as of yet

The her face will be as red as the balls!
>> No. 65043
[X] Raise your hand. I wanna be able to pick who I'm accidentally hitting in the face.
Fake it 'til you make it. Most likely nowhere pleasant, but that's just semantics.
>> No. 65044
[x] Raise Nitori's hand. Gotta tease her somehow. Not quite hit the legal minimum as of yet.

This cannot possibly not backfire.
>> No. 65045
[X] Raise your hand. I wanna be able to pick who I'm accidentally hitting in the face.
[x] Raise Nitori's hand. Gotta tease her somehow. Not quite hit the legal minimum as of yet.

>> No. 65048
File 151067779042.jpg - (480.91KB, 800x1200, Wait who was the other one.jpg) [iqdb]
65048
[17] Raise your hand. I wanna be able to pick who I'm accidentally hitting in the face.
[17] Raise Nitori's hand. Gotta tease her somehow. Not quite hit the legal minimum as of yet.

— - — - —

Being the ass I am, I look at the high road: my hand. I could raise the thing if I wanted, and I'd probably be forced into acquaintance status with more people than I'm used to. However, there was also the ever tempting low road: Nitori's hand. The girl's just plain fun to get a reaction out of, as she never seems to compromise on her feelings. Sure, she gets wise to patterns after a while, but she never does get used to 'em.

So, I mashed the high road and low road together, and lifted both our hands at once. Our fingers locked and a shit-eating grin and a half plastered on my face.

Nitori tugged our hands back down, more hissing than whispering, "What are you doing?" 'Course, her cheeks were a cute shade of red. Always did think a blush suited her more than that pale fleshy color; those wide, panicked eyes helped as well, of course.

I, of course, tugged our hands back up. "Conscripting you; what else?"

She, also of course, because of course she would, then proceeded to tug it back down again. "No. No, you aren't."

And up they went. "And why not?" Had to wonder if she really cared, though. Must be stronger than me, right? Whoa, weird thought: Nitori the not-wimp.

Aaand down. "Because I'm not a leader!"

Up! "Power doesn't choose ya, right?"

Aaaaaand down again. "There's not power to be had in gym!"

I gave her a big ol' grin, explaining, "You mean you don't wanna be on my team? No chance of me smashin' that nose bloody all over again with me around."

"No. You'll pull it off anyways." Ouch, Nitori. Just ouch. Ahh well; I know she wants to be.

There was a particularly feminine clearing of a throat off to the side, and the both of us turned as one. It was Miss plum 'do. "I believe the two of you would make a more lovely alliance than you would a scene. With that said, that leaves only one team left to have a head picked for."

Nitori, of course, because again, of course of course, voiced her protest. "B-b-but I didn't raise my hand; Marisa raised it! She should have to lead!" That she wasn't even trying to let go made me wonder about that. Then again, turtle butt's hardly emotionally consistent of late.

Every knuckle in the teacher's hand popped in symphony as she made a fist in the air. A real crappy kinda orchestra, but was what it was; expecting much for knuckles wasn't a good idea. "Those that did not choose power truly are free of corruption! This alone surely makes you the very best leader we could have hoped for!"

"No?!"

As if Nitori never said a thing, Byakuren continued, fire in her eye, "Ohh, how poetic it is; a young woman that wanted nothing but to be left alone ending up entangled in a battle for a cause she didn't believe in, at the behest of an unlikely ally!" Unlikely, my ass. ...Actually, scratch that; involving butts with kappa soundly like it might end badly, best friend or not. Unlikely, my foot. There. Worst she'd do over there is tickle me.

"What??" Or more that she'd rather sit it out and fiddle with her cool junk, if I had to guess.

"Ohh, this shall be a fine team, indeed!" Welp, the teacher's crazy. Good kind at least, but crazy is crazy.

While the teacher started to gush all over Nitori about barely related topics, I looked to who all was raising their hands under their own power. I had to tune out the ramblings, as the teacher was borderline going off on a tangent.

What I found was some blue-haired kid waving her hand impatiently, and there was some excitable-looking brunette as well. Short hair on the both of 'em. Of the two, I had a feeling it'd be the tiny, impatient one and not the small, fairly ordinary one. Blue looked like she'd raise a stink if it wasn't her, as grumpy as she looked.

Done with talking the ear off of my handholding victim, the teacher made herself noteworthy again, saying, "Alright, where was I... Ahh, that's right!" She looked to the others, obviously thinking over the two options at length. Couldn't just pick haphazardly after all. "Now, on a scale of one to five, show me how much you wish to have the roll by way of finger." ...That's one way to do it.

The brunette's victory seemed assured with her full hand of five, but Blue surprised us all by way of deploying a second hand, as well as maybe a bit of a lack of understanding that both hands together go well above the maximum. Forget turning the dial to 11, that's like going to 20.

The teacher gave Blue a smile, seeming to accept that answer. A ruffle, too. "Ahh, it seems that you are the victor, erm..."

"Cirno!" Hey, hold up. That grin... That moxie... She's remindin' me an awful lot of myself.

Welp. Looks like I gotta get serious; if I lose to her, she'll replace me like some sorta crappy doppleganger, right?

Right.

The teacher took that moment to interrupt my thoughts, explaining, "The two of you can go first."

Brown's probably got a sore spot over losing, so the best way to capitalize on that is...

— - — - —

[ ] ...taking her for my team. Have her embrace the anger. Let it flow through her.
[ ] ...letting Cirno have her. I just gotta avoid picking her unless I have to. Let's sabotage their team from within...
>> No. 65049
I'm guessing the Brunette is Chen?
>> No. 65050
File 151070729474.jpg - (205.60KB, 1366x703, Hopefully you get their name!.jpg) [iqdb]
65050
>>65049

I'm afraid that Marisa hasn't learned whoever-it-is' name as of yet.
>> No. 65051
[x] ...taking her for my team. Have her embrace the anger. Let it flow through her.

Yes...embrace your hatred...
>> No. 65052
[x] ...taking her for my team. Have her embrace the anger. Let it flow through her.

BEFRIEND
>> No. 65053
[X] ...taking her for my team. Have her embrace the anger. Let it flow through her.

Revenge is a dish best served with a side of VIOLENCE.
>> No. 65054
File 151072407350.jpg - (15.04KB, 320x400, do-it.jpg) [iqdb]
65054
[x] Her hate has made her powerful...
-[x] It is swelling in her now.
--[x] Have her take her spheroid weapon.
---[x] Use it.
----[x] Pick her so that she may strike Cirno down with it!
>> No. 65055
[X] ...taking her for my team. Have her embrace the anger. Let it flow through her.

- GORGE your hatred, ENBRACE your rage!
> Sha of Hatred, World of Warcraft: Mists of Pandaria
>> No. 65056
[X] ...taking her for my team. Have her embrace the anger. Let it flow through her.
>> No. 65057
File 151074879053.jpg - (38.52KB, 240x442, So indistinct without a hat.jpg) [iqdb]
65057
[18] ...taking her for my team. Have her embrace the anger. Let it flow through her.

— - — - —

"You." I pointed straight at the brunette, who perked up. "I'm taking you." Heh. That got a nice reaction. Good!

Two-tone gasped as the brunette came to my side, interrupting her as she was likely about to introduce herself. "Are you not even going to ask your partner's opinion?"

"Nope; I already know her answer." Which was that she didn't care.

Before Nitori could so much as get a word in edgewise, the teacher clasped her hands together with another sound of popping joints. Yeesh! Must use the things as air tanks of something... "Ohh, it's wonderful that the two of you are already so close!"

While the teacher was busy gushing, Cirno called out, "Dai, you can be on my second! Which means that I still get to pick again!" When I looked, I saw an uncanny familiarity in the two girls to myself and Nitori, ignoring that they were nothing like us. Think Nitori saw the same, as she let out a snorts.

With the teacher finally sated, I asked little Miss Unknown, "So, how about we beat the snot out of Cirno, huh?"

Snickering, she answered, "I like the sound of that. My name's Lyrica. Nice to meet you." She offered a hand, and I only then realized she had a bit of the West in her schnozz and eyes. Probably a mix of some kind, though it sadly didn't seem to do any favors for her chest.

I took the hand, giving it a firm shake. "Kirisame Marisa, and this is my cohort, Nitori."

"Friend, Marisa."

"Same difference." Heh. Got an eye roll outta her and a snicker out of Lyrica. I'll take it.

Still, after that, nobody really stood out, so I just picked at random; didn't recognize a single one of them, though Cirno did call one with green hair Wriggle. Seems not-me's got me beat on friendly faces in the room. Not a good sign, but as all but one of the three is... well, my height or worse, as pathetic as that sounds, I didn't predict them being MVPs.

With the last of the class split into sides, that left only one thing! Our team needs a strategy. One that'll work. One that'll win.

And, to win we have to...

— - — - —

[ ] ...be aggressive. The teams gotta shove our balls in their face! Or wherever the things land! Aim never was my strong suit.
[ ] ...be defensive. Anyone gets out, we gotta catch those balls. Risky, as I don't know most of them, but could bring the meat shields (otherwise known as crap players) back in.
[ ] ...be evasive. If nobody gets hit, nobody goes out. If nobody goes out, nobody has to catch any balls, so no worries of cock-ups.
[ ] ...be sneaky. Let 'em unload their balls and amass a horde. When the iron is hottest, and we see the whites of their eyes and all that crap, we take 'em all out with overwhelming firepower!
[ ] Write-in.
>> No. 65058
[x] ...be sneaky. Let 'em unload their balls and amass a horde. When the iron is hottest, and we see the whites of their eyes and all that crap, we take 'em all out with overwhelming firepower!
>> No. 65059
Damn it Byakuren, you have arthritis or something in your knuckles if they keep cracking and popping just by moving them slightly?
>> No. 65060
[X] ...be evasive. If nobody gets hit, nobody goes out. If nobody goes out, nobody has to catch any balls, so no worries of cock-ups.

Touhou is as Touhou does, regardless of setting. Let's show 'em why we're the protagonist (and options).
>> No. 65061
[X ] ...be sneaky. Let 'em unload their balls and amass a horde. When the iron is hottest, and we see the whites of their eyes and all that crap, we take 'em all out with overwhelming firepower!
>> No. 65062
[x] ...be sneaky. Let 'em unload their balls and amass a horde. When the iron is hottest, and we see the whites of their eyes and all that crap, we take 'em all out with overwhelming firepower!
>> No. 65063
[x] If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.
-[x] Wrench sounds like wench.
--[x] A wench is something to call a witch.
---[x] Marisa is pretending to be a witch.
----[x] Ain't nobody calls Marisa a wench.
-----[x] So just have the witch called a wench throw a ball like wrench. They can't dodge a witch's wenchly wrench throw.
------[x] Ergo, they cannot dodge a ball.
-------[x] Q.E.D.
>> No. 65064
[x] ...be evasive. If nobody gets hit, nobody goes out. If nobody goes out, nobody has to catch any balls, so no worries of cock-ups.

1CC that shit.
>> No. 65065
[x] ...be sneaky. Let 'em unload their balls and amass a horde. When the iron is hottest, and we see the whites of their eyes and all that crap, we take 'em all out with overwhelming firepower!

I don't think outmanoeuvring Cirno will be a challenge.
>> No. 65066
[x] ...be sneaky. Let 'em unload their balls and amass a horde. When the iron is hottest, and we see the whites of their eyes and all that crap, we take 'em all out with overwhelming firepower!

Also, for any interested, I finally had the energy/time to update a story other than this! I'm happy to feel like I'm no longer slacking~
>> No. 65067
File 151084745629.jpg - (69.39KB, 970x606, Meanwhile on the moon.jpg) [iqdb]
65067
[19] ...be sneaky. Let 'em unload their balls and amass a horde. When the iron is hottest, and we see the whites of their eyes and all that crap, we take 'em all out with overwhelming firepower!

— - — - —

"Alright, let's huddle!" Ain't gonna lose this match, no matter what. I can't rely on the others to be strong or swift or skilled, so there's only one option: I gotta play smart and I gotta be sneaky. "Now, who here's the strongest?"

Not even waiting a moment, some crazy long-haired ginger girl around my height boasted, "If you need strong, I'm that and more!"

"Like... more strong than strong, or strong with a side of fries?" Aaaand now I could go for some fries.

"Yeah!" ...Ehh. Good enough.

"Alright, we're gonna play the evasion game early on—" The ginger groaned over me, not that I slowed down. "—and we ain't gonna return fire until—" Once more she groaned, this time more annoyed. "—their guard is down, and we have all their balls. Then, when we have all the balls, uhh..." Looking to the ginger, I asked, "What's your name?"

"Name's Suika; Ibuki Suika, and don't you forget it!" Be kinda a dick move to go out of my way to.

"Right. Then Ibuki Suika's gonna have all the balls and she's gonna use 'em. Starting on Cirno. Take 'er out and that should get 'em panicking."

Suika gave a grin, answering, "You got it, Boss!" Heh. Boss.

"Still, that means ya gotta avoid getting hit, alright?" Don't need to lose out muscle after all.

"Sure thing, Boss! Should be easy enough!" Nice bit of confidence on that one.

"Good. Now, you guys all get that? Play it safe, don't waste balls and we can take 'em out in one easy swarmma balls. Suika's our big girl, though; her balls are goin' in Cirno's face. I'll work as a distraction by grabbing up a ball for her. I get out, I get out. I don't? Big whup. Keep goin' like nothin' happened. Rest of you, stay back and be ready; you guys just need to not get hit and be ready to take 'em all out in one big ol' swoop. Now, let's go out there and win!" I was surprised at the enthusiasm of the team, if nothing else; they all cheered. Was a good feeling, that they liked the plan. Then again, who doesn't like winning fast? I liked winning fast.

With that done, we took to our side of the court. As impatient as Cirno looked, I couldn't imagine they even had much of a plan.

From the side, a whistle at the ready, the teacher called out, "We're playing dodgeball today! The rules are simple: The team to run out of members first loses. If you catch a ball, a member of your team comes back in. If you hit someone, they go out. Crossing the center line takes you out as well. Now, on the count of three, the game begins; on the count of three, my whistle shall signify the start."

I tried a few times to tug my hand free of Nitori's grasp, but eventually just gave Nitori a sideways glance. "Also? Might wanna let go of my hand. Gettin' a little sweaty.

"One!"

"Ehh?" Nitori looked, and, sure enough, we were still stuck firmly together.

"Two!"

Finally free of her grasp, I took a running position, ready for anythi—

The way she blew that whistle was more akin to a sonic boom. My ears were ringing, and I was pretty sure that I might be temporarily deaf in that side. Still, it didn't stop me from charging forward. Running was a specialty of mine, and so was a bit of 'borrowing,' if you get my drift.

Needless to say, I was there first, borrowing the nearest ball. Tossed it over my shoulder, figuring there was nothing said about passing. Left it in Suika's hands to catch the thing while I took a leap back, wanting my eyes forward. Off to the left, that Wriggle girl got her hands on one first, and I could tell her sights were on me; just as I had planned. Dodging was somethin' I was good at. Fists, especially. Just not, y'know... rocket fists.

When the ball was flung, it flew for center mass. Easy dodge; I fell over. Had the time to get back up before the other three balls were in hand. Now was the hard part. One ball came at my face, so I turned, nearly getting in touch with my inner rudolph when it streaked past. Second one, I had to spread my legs to avoid, letting it sail between my knees. But that third one? Well, it was in Cirno's hand. Had a bad feeling about it, and it only got worse when the ball froze over.

Although, that was alleviated a bit when something red streaked past my head. Cirno wasn't so lucky, as she kinda... exploded. ...Along with the wall behind her.

I looked back, and found everyone looking at Suika like she had grown an extra head. For her part, she just grinned, giving me a thumbs up.

I looked forward, and it kinda looked like half her team were pissing themselves while Cirno powder slowly settled on the ground.

Looked the the side, and found the teacher was more than a little shocked. Her eyebrows? The things kinda broke orbit a little after the ball.

— - — - —

[ ] Uhh...
[ ] What.
[ ] ...Crap.
[ ] Shit!
[ ] The hell?!
>> No. 65068
[X] Uhh...
[X] What.
[X] ...Crap.
[X] Shit!
[X] The hell?!

They're all basically the same, so why not all of the above?
>> No. 65069
[x] The hell?!

Day one and we're an accessory to murder, good work.
>> No. 65070
[x] ...Crap.
Murder is against the rules, no?
>> No. 65071
[x] Uhh...
[x] Make mental note: do not piss off watermelons
>> No. 65072
My router may be exploding, so if I vanish for a day... well, I am going to be both livid and forced to do an extra update. Which would mean two updates in a day.

Although, if it does, I may also have to use whatever votes I last saw. So, if I end up writing the complete wrong thing, I'm still gonna post it, but with a vote to redo it as the right vore.
>> No. 65073
[x] The hell?!

Yet another victim of Ibuki "Slaughtermelon" Suika!
>> No. 65074
[x] What.

Keep it classy.
>> No. 65075
[x] The hell?!
>> No. 65076
[x] The hell?!

— - — - —

Okay, seriously. I expected maybe a bloody nose, or maybe even a KO, but if I were told that this girl could pulverize someone into powder with a freaking dodgeball, I'd have at least considered not using her for an easy win. "What the fu—"

The teacher was on me in an instant. "Language!" Ohh, great. "One mustn't swear, no matter if the children one was tasked to watch over were obliterated!"

The green-haired girl that I think Cirno called Dai tried to interrupt, "Umm, she's f—" Tried was the working word.

"Ohh, if anyone should be swearing profusely is should be myself! This child was my responsibility, and now she is dead! Snuffed in an instant..."

"She's—" Ohh, her voice is tremblin'. Really does remind me of Nitori. Well, younger Nitori, anyways. She's more a sourpuss these days.

"Ohh, what if I am fired? Or worse, sealed away for an excruciating length? Could that be my fate? And if not, should it be?"

"B-but—" Get kinda quiet, ain't she? ...Huh. Is the powerpuff's pile kinda... shrinking? Weird.

"Or worse still, into the sun?! Ohh, I knew I should not have gone with dodgeball this early in the year! Ohh, I am such a fool!"

I cleared my throat, and picked my best 'pay attention to me' words. "Oi, plum-head! Minty fresh is tryin' to say somethin', so shut your trap and open your ears."

The teacher rounded on me as best she could, tripping over her words out of pure shock. "P-plum head? I am hardly... I mean, my hair isn't even..."

This gave Dai the chance she needed, though. "Cirno is fine!!" When all eyes turned to her, she blushed, shrinking at having raised her voice. "Umm... she'll be okay."

As if to demonstrate this, Cirno just kinda... popped back into being, bare as the day she was born. Literally, it was that anticlimactic; all it amounted to was the sound of that last kernel of popcorn popping, and there she was. Nothin' cool, even.

Plums let out a long sing, saying, "Ohh, good..."

The Little Stripper That Could pointed at me, shouting, "You did that on purpose, didn't you?!"

— - — - —

[ ] "You're naked." Well, it's true.
[ ] "Nope." Still true; I really didn't.
[ ] "Wasn't me!" Seriously, I never told her to go for a fatality. Not even a lie.
[ ] "Was my plan all along! Woulda gotten away with takin' the your throne of popularity for myself it wasn't for that meddling kid!" Lay the sarcasm on thick enough that even the teacher should get it.
>> No. 65077
Looks like everyone is playing HSiFS.

[X] "Nope." Still true; I really didn't.
-[X] "You're naked." Well, it's true.
>> No. 65079
[x] "Nope." Still true; I really didn't.
-[x] "You're naked." Well, it's true.

Just another day at the office.
>> No. 65080
[X] "Nope." Still true; I really didn't.
-[X] "You're naked." Well, it's true.
>> No. 65082
[X] "Nope." Still true; I really didn't.
[X] "You're naked." Well, it's true.
>> No. 65083
[x] "Nope." Still true; I really didn't.
-[x] "You're naked." Well, it's true.
--[x] "That must be chilly." Puns are the great distractor.
>> No. 65088
[X] "Nope." Still true; I really didn't.
[X] "You're naked." Well, it's true.

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