>>203787
It's been a week, and what a ride. This was far more intense than I expected it to be, right down to just a few hours ago. Dice roll to determine tie-breaker. I appreciate all the votes, and I hope even if your route didn't win you'll still have fun with the story.
===
The fog which had permeated your mind since you woke up here was beginning to recede. Many details still remained fuzzy, specifically HOW you got here, but at least you were beginning to remember enough to not be considered a complete amnesiac.
Your parents had been a young couple when they moved in together. They had yet to marry one another, but planned to "when the time was right". Neither was what could be considered responsible. They partied, went to rock concerts, and were fairly well-liked among their peers. Things looked bright for them despite their carefree lifestyle. The economy was good, they were comfortable, and life and fortune smiled upon them. Then your mother became pregnant with you.
Shortly after you were born, your mother left. Disappeared entirely without a trace. When you were a young boy you imagined that something grand must have happened to her. Maybe she was a secret spy, off in the cold wastes of a northern country putting an end to an evil genius. Maybe she was actually a witch, and when the time came she would visit you and teach you secret powers. There was a hope inside you for the longest time that someday she would return. Someday she would explain where she was, and make things right again. As your childhood innocence receded, so too did this dream, as the uncomfortable reality began to sink in.
In contrast, your father was there, an eternal fixture in your life. Particularly, on his recliner like a statue. Rarely did he leave that spot. He had managed to convince the state he was disabled in some manner, allowing him to stay at home. When you were 7 he gave you money for groceries and told you how to purchase food and what you'd need to tell the cashier kid to get cigarettes and beer. That was the most fatherly advice he'd ever give you.
You heard stories of other kids and their negative relationships with their fathers. You almost wished your old man would strike you with his fist or spit words of venom toward you. He never did though. He never acknowledged your presence unless you were bringing him food or beer. There was no love in his eyes, no life really. His existence was to be in a perpetual state of decay in front of the tube.
Both of your parents had checked themselves out of your life. Circumstance hoisted maturity upon you at a young age, denying you a proper childhood. While your peers were chatting about card games and collectibles, you were thinking of the best way to walk home to avoid the territorial knife-wielders. One incident that always stuck out to you was in middle school when some punk decided that they'd cause trouble by messing with you. You tried to shrug them off first, but they kept insisting, harassing you, grabbing you...
Of course, the moment you threw the first punch was the moment a teacher turned the corner to witness it. Of course, she ignored your side of the story, and only you earned trouble for it.
After this event, the young stressed-out kid you were began to grow more cynical, more bitter, and more stand-offish. The wolves and the snakes out there, if they sought to mess with you they'd best prepare for a fight. And it felt like so many people were just that, predators waiting for the right moment to strike at their prey. The whole city was like that. You had no intention of being anyone's prey.
You formulated a plan to the side, nearing your final months of school. While others were discussing their dreams for college, you were saving up money from odd jobs and what you could sneak from your dad. Was it much? No. Was it enough to get you far from this place? Yes. Your plan was simple; you would buy a cheap used car and get far away from this city, deep into the wilderness, and disappear. You had studied wilderness living and homesteads, you knew you could do it. No more dealing with drug-addled gangbangers harassing you on the street, government bureaucrats with fake smiles pretending to be your friend and care for you only to stab you in the back, and no more coming home every night to see a slowly-dying husk that refuses to acknowledge you as anything more than a seed. These people would forget you, and you could live happily in peace, far from the stresses and nightmares of the city.
And then, here you were. Remembering properly who you were, you cringed at your earlier actions with Rumia and Cirno. Why had you allowed yourself to be pushed around so much by these little girls? Was that just a result of judgment impairment, due to whatever fogged your mind? Or was it a reflection of a different you? The latter though unsettled you deeply.
You looked back at the sweating yuki-onna and told her a more concise version of your story, leaving out many details. She had done you a favor that you appreciated, but you didn't trust her (or anyone really) enough to tell a comprehensive life story. You simply said you had a rough relationship with your parents, and you were saving up to move out into the woods.
"You're going to live all by yourself in the woods?" Letty asked, placing the bag of ice between her chunky thighs.
"It seems like a relaxing life, it always intrigued me."
"Roughing it in the woods isn't easy though."
You raised an eyebrow. "Isn't your house out here in the wilderness?"
"It's different for us youkai. We're strong. And here in Gensokyo, most of us can fly, so distance isn't a big issue. Out there though, I remember the wilderness being huge. A young girl like you with no powers would get devoured out there."
"Girl?" What the hell was this fatty saying? You were pretty obviously a guy. You raised your hand to correct her when your brain set off a big alarm. Your hand looked smaller than normal. Scrawny in fact. The nails were also long. All at once, your mind began to notice things off, things seriously off it hadn't noticed before until now.
"Where's your bathroom?"
"Eh?"
"Bathroom I need it now."
"It's..." Letty stumbled to sit up a bit. "It's down the hall that way on the le-" You darted out towards that direction before she could finish her sentence. "... Psht. Humans are so weird."
You locked the door behind you as you looked into the mirror. The reflection you had known your entire life was completely gone. In its place was someone else, someone you had never seen in your life. Your skin was pale and your entire body felt small and frail. Skinny arms, a stature on the shorter side. Your facial structure was notably feminine and could even be called cute, framed with short messy black hair. You looked down at your wide hips and moved a hand down quickly to confirm the absence of something. You were undeniably, as of this moment, a girl. You resembled what you imagine your sister would've looked like if you ever would've had one.
You sat on the toilet (something you quickly realized you'd be doing a lot more from now on) as your mind raced trying to process this. What the fuck? What the fuck? No seriously, what the fuck? How did this happen? Was it a byproduct of being in this weird wonderland? Was this reversible? It had to be, you just saw two women conjure snow and ice out of nothing while flying, of course some bullshit magic could fix this. It had to.
Another thought came into your mind. ... Were you gay now? You closed your eyes and began to use your imagination. Boobs, boobs, boobs, boobs... OK, you were still straight. Or, does that make you gay because you like girls now? You didn't know, you shouldn't have had to face this dilemma.
After some time to calm down, you stepped out of the bathroom and returned to Letty. "Welcome back, can you-"
"Why am I a girl now?"
"... What?"
"Girl! I'm a girl now! I've got these on my chest and I'm small and weak now, I wasn't like this when I entered here!" You frantically stated, the stress from the entire day pouring out. "What happened?! How did this happen!"
"Relax, relax! I don't know." Letty sat up straight, balancing the bag of ice in her lap. "I don't know much about you newcomers, or what happens to you. Maybe this is just a result of magic, or some other youkai having fun with you. I really don't know! I'm sure you'll figure it out." Letty took a deep breath. "Look, these kinds of strange happenings... happen here in Gensokyo often. It's just how this place is set up to be, with lots of magical beings roaming around. I don't know who did this to you or why, but I can at least explain to you more of the basics about Gensokyo, the places, and how things work. Then you can go out and seek whoever did this to you on your own and fix it. OK?"
You sighed and took a seat in a chair, noting just how big the chair felt compared to you. You closed your eyes and calmed down some. Stressing and panicking wouldn't get you out of this, and unlike the previous idiot you were with, Letty seemed to genuinely know some things, and not act like an egotistical idiot. "Alright, alright, sorry for yelling. Please, tell me about Gensokyo."
"First, get me some more ice bags and tea."
And so, the lightly-dressed fat girl covering herself in ice cubes began giving you the basic information about Gensokyo. What this place was and why it was made, the nature of youkai, the human village, and some of the major players, like Reimu Hakurei, the shrine maiden watching from afar. If you wanted to return to the real world, she was going to be your ticket.
"How are youkai created anyways?" You asked, curious.
"Many youkai and gods are born from belief, but that belief has made them always exist there, even before humans. However, if humans ceased to believe in them entirely, that past would be undone, since the past is always just an illusion. Does that make sense?"
"Not entirely."
Letty chuckled. "It's OK, I don't understand this stuff much either. Only a few of the more educated really seem to. For the rest of us youkai, as long as the system works, we don't really need to know how."
"What about individuals? Like, do you breed, or-"
"Yes, and youkai can breed with other youkai or humans. Or... I guess anything if there was belief imbued in it."
"Anything?"
"Even an umbrella or a drum."
How strange, how could anyone do anything lewd with those kinds of objects?
"Of course, some youkai can transform other humans into youkai, or humans can become them through other means. For example, vampires through bites, or magicians through intensive magic study."
"Really? So I could just become a youkai? Gain magic powers and all?"
Letty's face darkened unexpectedly at this comment. "You're saying something you don't really grasp the full gravity of." She took a sip of her tea. "But yes, you could. If you wanted to do that though, you'd need to do it very soon."
"Why?"
"Hakurei's job is to maintain Gensokyo's balance. The human village is considered a safe haven, a refuge for the humans living in it. The youkai don't attack them in their town limits, and even when they wander off most don't do much but scare them. Many fear the youkai as they rightfully should, and that fear is our most important sustenance, more than anything else. Without that, Gensokyo would crumble.
"Villagers are given these protections, but newcomers like you aren't. You could be killed anytime, anywhere. I could freeze you right now and no one could do anything about it." You shifted in your seat. "For newcomers, you can either visit Hakurei and ask to be sent back or become integrated into the village for those protections I mentioned earlier."
"But what if I became a youkai after that?"
"You would be exterminated by the shrine maiden. And not exterminated where she just beats you up and kicks you out of the village, exterminated as in dead." Letty took another sip. "Villagers cannot under any circumstances become youkai, it is antithetical to their purpose, and even the knowledge of it being possible would jeopardize things. If you want to become a youkai, you had best do so before lingering in the village too long and becoming naturalized to it."
You looked at your drink. "If this is such dangerous knowledge to even have, why tell me?"
"What would you do with this knowledge? Enter the village as a newcomer and tell them they can become youkai? How do you think the villagers would react to that? How would the most powerful deities in Gensokyo react to that? How would the shrine maiden react to that? It's one thing to have knowledge, it's another to be able to do anything with it."
You lingered on that thought as Letty continued talking. The two of you discussed Gensokyo late into the night before finally Letty decided enough was enough. She told you of the guest bedroom down the hall, and quickly fell asleep, still covered in her sweat and ice.
"Oh, by the way, you never told me your name." She called out suddenly, right before you closed the door."
"It's Alex!" You shouted back.
"Alex... Lucky name for you! Gender neutral. Could've been awkward if you had a boy's name!" You grumbled as you closed the door.
You entered the bedroom. You sat on the bed. There was a mirror in the corner but you didn't look towards it. In a sense, you had gotten something along the lines of what you wanted. You were far away from the city, in a strange land isolated from the world. Though you were also isolated in a new body, foreign and strange. And what the hell were you going to do tomorrow?
You could seek out the shrine maiden and ask her to take you home... But why? What was there to even return back out there for? Just to find a different isolated place to stay in? Even if that was what you wanted, you'd still need to fix this... female problem currently plaguing you first. And Letty had no leads for how it even happened to you.
You could decide to enter the village and become a resident there. That would grant you some much-needed protections, as currently, you were purely at the whim of any youkai's mercy. If you become a village resident that could at least make it a political scandal for the youkai that kills you. Hopefully, if you understood it right. Of course, becoming a resident would limit you in other ways. And you'd also be in a village, something which seemed sort of antithetical to what you planned to do with your life.
And, the forbidden fruit, becoming a youkai. You didn't really know how that would work. But becoming a monster... You could be really powerful? You wouldn't need to rely on anyone in that case, no hiding from the likes of Rumia. And with youkai being solitary creatures, you could fulfill your dream of a solitary life alone easily here.
Finally, there was still the Yukari question. Letty had already given you so much information about your predicament, but now you knew just how powerful Yukari was. How Gensokyo seemed to be her playground. You could still seek her out, she might be able to answer many of your questions Letty couldn't answer, or help you in some other way. Letty said that Hakurei could lead you to her if you wanted, though you hoped this wouldn't be another Cirno incident.
You rested your head in your hands as you tried thinking about what you were going to do tomorrow.
===
Pick 1
[] I want to remain a human, I've already changed enough here.
[] I want to become a youkai, I'll need every advantage I can get here.
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Pick 1
"Letty gave me a lot of information about Gensokyo, I think I'll head out to [write in location]".
Alex here has a basic understanding of Gensokyo now. What do you think our character's goals will be? Any additional comments or thoughts will be considered with your vote. If you want to become a youkai, the location we head to tomorrow will likely play a major role in deciding what species we become. But maybe some will want to remain human. Maybe it's a desire of purity, or you just want to be as weak as possible for your hag. Staying with Letty in her house is an option too.
