A heartbreaking story is currently unfolding that’s sure to have devastating ramifications for years to come. Just moments ago, without any warning, the worst person you know just made a great point. “If someone molests a fairy, then they are a pedophile, no excuses. Even if X is making the forest better, they are still a fairy fucker!”.
This is absolutely crushing news, and it’s unclear if recovery will ever be possible.
The tragedy occurred just a few moments ago during a debate about politics occurring among your friends. Out of nowhere, the most loathsome person you’ve ever met in your whole life chimed into the argument with a completely valid and irrefutable point. Every attempt to formulate a rebuttal to just the most insufferable asshole on the planet failed miserably because, for the first time ever, that piece of shit’s logic was entirely unassailable.
This is the kind of horrific event you always assume only happens to other people, but never to you. It’s amazing how life can change in an instant. One moment, everything’s normal, and the next you’re unable to find a single flaw in the intricate and logically sound reasoning of this fucking self-important, endlessly irritating prick. Up until now, everything that’s comes out of that girl’s mouth is pure dogshit, so now that she’s strung together an eloquent and convincing opinion, you’ve been completely blindsided.
In some ways, that’s the worst part of it: You were so used to this unbearable cretin saying nothing but garbage that you had no way to mentally prepare yourself for the day she made an amazing and insightful comment.
While this gut-wrenching calamity has passed, the shock and the sorrow it left in its wake may never truly fade. All you can do now is try to pick up the pieces, move on, and pray that this pompous moron never makes another great point ever again.
>>2450 You too are based for that comment. >>2451 Fairy Fucker detected, here's more dedicated to you.
"I have a crush on you. I could ask you out, and move on with my life if you said no.
Or we could be friends! See, I don't want to consider that you might not be attracted to me. I'm scared of rejection, so I've decided relationships should grow smoothly out of friendships. Isn't that a great idea?
When you have problems, I'll be there for you, night after night. Selflessly.
I'll tear down the jerks you date, and wait for you to realize how good I am. That only I will ever understand as I head pat your head.
You won't want to hurt my feelings, and I won't ever force the issue. I'll tell myself it's because I 'I value our friendship'.
Bit by bit. I'll make you depend on me. You'll think about how long it would take to built this kind of connection again. And in a moment of weakness, and loneliness...
You'll give in.
It'll feel comfortable and natural. You'll quietly revise your definition of love and try to be happy and sometimes you will be.
Only the wistfulness in your gaze and the tiny pause you say 'I love you" will hint that this wasn't the ending you'd hoped for.
Does that sound good?"
"That sounds so creepy and disturbing"
"Heh, I know right? that's what they call the "Nice Guy Mentality'. Isn't it amazing?"
"How is this related to fairy fuckers though?"
"Simple, once they inevitable get rejected. Those nice guy losers go out in the woods to try and cream a fairy. Quite easily too since most fairies are quite weak, but right before they can put their meat salad in the fairy explodes itself to cuck the loser at the last possible moment. Isn't that hilarious?"
"*Grips needle with violent intent* That's...utterly revolting! Just because they can't get girlfriends their own size doesn't mean they should pick on someone smaller than them! How dare they act like that!?"
"Haa? what are you going to do about it heh? Will you go on a castration quest? Good luck with that, there's more losers out there than you could possibly get. It's so funny~".
"But that's.... that’s so revolting!"
"It's awesome all right, frankly can't wait for things to get worse so why don't you sit back and watch the commencing shitshow?"
"Wait a minute...how do you even know this? How do I know this is real story at all huh?"
"Would I ever lie to you?"
"Yes! You've done so multiple times and are the most untrustworthy person I've ever met in my whole life, your absolute shit stain!"
"D'aw, no need to be so flattering. But eh, maybe it's real and maybe it's not? It's rumoured to happen in the outside so it may have some basis. Who knows?".
"Then I pity whoever has to deal with that".
"I don't, this shit is the funniest thing I've heard!"
What did you just say you fricking piece of underwear? I’ll have you know that as a cactus youkai, I cannot help the fact that I am prickly. Your funny remark is nothing more than RACIST!
Did you think you were funny by chance? That by some sort of clever wit, your admirable sarcasm would hit me straight in the gut and cause me to disintegrate out of shame at being overplayed by a superior big-brained lifeform?
Well, sucks to be you but you’re wrong buddy! As we speak, I am packing my bags and hacking your ip to find your real address, then I’ll leave the border, get to the local cash converter and fly aaaall to whatever cakehole you live in ya fresh strip-teasing bonobo!
I am not prickly you piece of banana doodoo cup cake salami sundae mixed in a blender! You’re the one that’s wrong here but guess what I’m feeling merciful!
You wouldn’t know this would happen, you wouldn’t know that your silly taunt would provoke the storm into wiping your poopoo face off the beach and back to the fricking ocean with its man-fish and fish-man and fishy fishy manliness!
Now choose a 2hu so I’ll make an oneshot about it or hide forever behind your screen like the hi-hi-ha-ha-stinky winker that you are and always will be.