Episodic Adventure, lots of butchered English. Updates come at a ratio of 1 to 3 days. Not expected to be more than some short fun, in total x episodes have been prewritten. This is the tutorial.
Disclaimer: What you’re about to view are recordings made by a professional. We do not reimburse anyone who follows this advice and ends injured or maimed or suffers any sort of grievous injury from attempting to mimic said professional. Knowledge and the ability to use it are separate things.
In dem Norther Hemies, inside a secret land'o fantasy. Laa creatures that have been bejingled from the dark minds'of you's fellow mengos. These mystic fella folks now in da cutesy pie camp are known as yoo-kay. Dis is da venture of yous fella Hunter as she shows you the wonders 'o all them smegickal fiddlers
The scene shifts to show such a creature in it’s natural habitat. The bamboo forest with its green allures and mysterious aura all apparent to the viewer. Finally it zooms into a creature that most of the outside would know…that of an Night bird stealthily stalking its prey. An unaware and probably soon to be eaten rabbit. She seems ready to pounce at it from any moment.
Narrator: Yoo-kay's also known as Mythical Beast Maidens or Lil Cute Murder Girlies. Dam names be strong describers of what cucumbers in's dem pant pockets: Dem be creatures that do not exist no more or have been forgotten like yo''s old ma grocery orders. Though many 'o em be known as ferocious man-enjoyers. Dem Mystic Missies can have a softer angle to em.
Finally the camera zooms out and as it turns out, the Bird is being stalked as well. By a human wearing a mobile bush around their torso and a nice brown hat as the only signal that it’s her, the bird has somehow not noticed them.
Hey, son! Bet you's didn’t see me there. Wanna know why? Cause Aye’m Maxsy Hunter! Professional Yoo-kay Hunter and extra-supper at it. Right now Aye’m hunting one of em Sparrow type of missies.
The camera zooms in again, as Maxsy manages to get even closer to the gal. Stops the moment the girl turns around and continues the stalking the moment the Night-Bird decided that the noise was nothing. After a few more seconds the camera zooms into said Nightbird, and her wings and claws are amplified on how she's not human.
Quite the majestic chicky ain’t she? Don’t be fooled yet though, that’s a honest to earth's love men-consumer and if you wanna survive an encounter with one like dat like Aye do, then you’s gotta have sharp mitts, trained endurance, shaggable looks, and most importantly: a backpack full of ingenuity and surprises! Course that’s got a chappie on it’s own for later.
But that’s enough yabber blabber, keep your eyes peeled up and pay attention to the next scene!
Here’s dem apples: Da Night Sparrow is a smarty creature out to procure it’s next lungeon, though at most times it’s capable of interacting with civilization like yous and Aye today is a day where she simply desires a quick stomach-flutter. And oh mama is she well equipped to hunt for one!
Just look at those beautiful slashers it’s got on those fingas. One swoop of those and your organs will fall right out! Not only that but have a glimpse at her her posture, see how her wings are slightly raised? That’s the indication that she’s getting a feel for when to pounce! And by the gods, and I mean dear planet earth have a gander at those peepers, with a looksie can like dat, she can see you commit some Australian Diplomacy from miles aw-oh!
There she goes son! faster than the wind! Oh boy that's wabbit a dead one! Run Wabbit! run for your life little pawst-ooh my mama it can't hear us, it's too late. Nu-uh, oh nada this stuff ain't child friendly. Cut! cut this out!
****A few seconds have been cut out****
Da little wabbit's gotten snared by her sharpy fingas and its head's been yanked right outta it! yowzers that must been a shocking end but fear not son and sonnetes, Da little bun-bun died before it could feel even a smickle.
Course, if I’m not extra clankster on how Aye act from now on, yous fella Hunter might be next! Facts have it dat the girl can fly faster than a man can run, sing a song that makes all oh so jolly in an un-Christmas way and worst of all the gal owns an industry so she must know how to be vicious. That little missie knows how to kill for sure!
Course, that only makes the hunt better. Now Aye’m no fool so Aye’ve prepared for dis a weeky on ahead, see the thing is. After days of analysing my chances Aye’ve concocted the perfect strategy for this lady friend.
There’s a cage just a few meters away, it's a nice cagey. Made of steel and blessed by dat lovely Tomato Priestess. Now Aye’ve only got to get da birdy'in it. Why yous say? Cause da gal’s an endangered species. When people talk about a night sparrow she’s the only one. And you know what I say to that? That extinction ain’t gonna happen!
Da's girly too busy nomming on some wabbit now, dis is da perfect chance to capture that lil missy.
Aye found a perfectly viable mate for her, now all aye need to do is catch da girl and save her species. Dat’s the work we Hunters do. We protect da nature, even if some monstas mighta not be so huggable or cutesy, everyone deserves to live in our beautiful little glue orb. It’s our job as humans to protect our fellow earth-friends.
Now see son, yous could just skip ahead to the capture cuz it's diddly done already but that’d be kind of boring. Nay my sons and sonnettes, this film’s got a little smegick on it. Straylan Smegick to be clear!
Several yellow icons with text appear on the screen as the video is paused. See those clickadoodles thingies? Dem be choices my son, choices yous get to make to not only see but also experience the Yoo-kay Hunter experience, click on one of em and see what’ll happen.
Some choices lead to, and please forgive my saucy words. Even more choices dear mama! Course some choices may be good and some may be bad, but believe me this is all meant for your education and entertainment and hopefully by seeing this: You too will see how wonderful dem Yoo-kay can be.
Or if you’ve already seen this nonsense, press the Menu button on your device to get at the scene selection. Experienced ticks have no need for a little intro now do they? That’s the explanation done.
Did yous get all that son? If not then press the backwards button to zoom back to that uh…you press the backwards button so that the video goes in a way god did not intend, anti-forward is the word.
Aye hope you enjoy this lil endeavour and always remember: The Earth loves you and so do I. Yous one of dis world’s wonderful creatures, hope you have fun as much as Aye made this.
The audio ends and the video loops on a 3 second clip of the protag standing in place
[x]: Take out dem sleepy time shooty toy and aim at dem birdy's exposed neck. The little missie's guard be wide open and yous boing boings be blessed with some fancy smegick.
[x] Hold da kangaroo, a shot shot too soon can spell ya doom. Getta one of a good gander at yous special backpack to see if yous got something for dis occasion. Better safe than six feet unda.
[x] Da little birdy missy's no longery hungry, letsa take a closer looksie and introduce youself to her excellent company. If ya lucky you's gonna get some excellent gander at dem beastly bits for da camera.
[x] Snore, tutos are made for baby-ladies, you son are a proffesional! Get to da scene/stage selection!
[x]: Take out dem sleepy time shooty toy and aim at dem birdy's exposed neck. The little missie's guard be wide open and yous boing boings be blessed with some fancy smegick. Les give this beut a proper gander up close ey?
[x] Hold da kangaroo, a shot shot too soon can spell ya doom. Getta one of a good gander at yous special backpack to see if yous got something for dis occasion. Better safe than six feet unda. Imagine trying to shoot a birdie who can shoot many, many more bullets than you can.
[x] Da little birdy missy's no longery hungry, letsa take a closer looksie and introduce youself to her excellent company. If ya lucky you's gonna get some excellent gander at dem beastly bits for da camera.
Aye didn't come fer a gander at sum sleepy beasty. Woz the point'a dem Strayan muscles if yous ain't gonna use em?
>>68429 Cor now that's a good point actually. Whats'a point in viewin' tha' beauty of nature if it ain't in motion?
>>68425 Changing my vote to [x] Da little birdy missy's no longery hungry, letsa take a closer looksie and introduce youself to her excellent company. If ya lucky you's gonna get some excellent gander at dem beastly bits for da camera.
[x] Da little birdy missy's no longery hungry, letsa take a closer looksie and introduce youself to her excellent company. If ya lucky you's gonna get some excellent gander at dem beastly bits for da camera.
Da's right mates! Let's get an excellent gander at them beastly maiden. Da best part in nature is when it's in motion. Who's wanna watch some sleeping birdy? Nah, mate we ain't a british documentary. Di's be Straylan quality!
Now lookie here mates, ay'me gonna approach da birdy girly very carefully now. But first Aye need to teach you HOW to safely approach a yoo-kay if yous ever see one of em buggers! Course, worst case scenario that's the last thing Aye'll ever see aye?
Just look at how aye do it right now, try and keep up!
Maxsy gives an thumbs up at the camera while the narrator speaks again as the hunter slowly gets even more closer to the Sparrow-Girl. Said girl is now taking care of the remains of the rabbit and relaxing on some rock in the open.
During the whole process, the voice over continues. But a certain point the hunter stops moving and retreats into the bush cause the bird notice movement again. "Was this bush always here?" is what she says for those who understand Japanese as she cautiously watches the bush with some suspicion now. Not removing her gaze at it for quite some time while eating.
Aw naaaah, she's staring at my camouflage now. That's a bad thing sons, if aye were to jump out now like some jumping jack she'll shoot first and ask questions later and believe me that's bloody terrible mate! This is a real wet soak!
But it's all right! that's how the little birdy sings now don't she? Guess aye might as well entertain ya with some cool survival tips til she stops her analysing of the area ey?
How to survive a Yoo-kay encountay
First yous gotta react with straylan speed! The moment ya see a Yoo-kay is the moment ye make your body low so as not to be seen as a rival, then ya spread dem legs out so yaa can dodge any sudden projectile they might throw at ya, yeah that's right bud I said projectile! and aye don't mean little squirts of poison, spit or bullets. Nay these projectiles are a new level!
See these dudettes or at least most of em are capable of shooting some wild bursts of magical footballs known as Denmakou! And what is Dennmakou? Well long story short dey be pretty magical smullets made for the use of not that lethal magical warfare. It's like the guns in the devil's country: Everyone and their momma can bust a magical cap in ya head and they'll do so if the weather's not to their liking. Anyone and anything can use it mate, it's like japanese texas.
The sizes of them balls can vary to the size of a peanutter to that of an cannonballer with an eating disorder and boy do Aye tell ya. Ya do NOT want to be hit by one of em. At least not if you're on your own or haven't declared one of them smegickal duels (We won't be covering this, that's more of a local sport than anything).
Biggest mistake of me life getting hit by one of those was, Ay'me even gonna tell ya the details behind it. Because aye want you to know that Aye'm not perfect and that everyone makes mistakes, but in here those mistakes can cost you your life!
See on my first few days here, Aye heard about some wolfies causing trouble with the merchants in town. Poor humble berries couldn't take more than five steps before some yiffer tried to rob them of them hard-worked deeners, course aye decided to go track em down and sneakily beat em with my Hunter Skills. Twas an easy job done with my boomerang and lassoo! Compared to them me trip 'a London this is a field trip, way less horny rascals in this place too aye tell ya!
But as it turns out one of em had went off for a midnight piddle and the moment she saw me, damn bloke tried to sneak up on me but me senses were too sharp so aye turned around and threw me boomerang at the same time she took her shot. Course da boomerang knocked her right out! but a laser hits me straight in the shoulder shazam! Twas one hell of a barney!
Faster than light da laser bubloodyburned my arm like it was a chicken that fell into da frying pan! Three more ticks of da lock and the pain would have spread through my whole body and knocked me out cold, to be eaten by the wolves. Luckily enough it had rained the night before and so the mud on the floor combined with the knockback made me fall right on me bum. Boy was that a close shave. Scariest moment of my life it was, and it's a great reminder that working with Yoo-kay is life risking.
So always remember: never let a yoo-kay out of ya ray of sight or yous gonna get something nasty.
Sec-oi where did the birdie gone? The camera zooms out to show she went and walked away Oh, no no no that's no good. We can't lose her now! we gotta go buds, try to keep up! And the hunter quickly moves to regain her trial
****The scene changes****
Once again, we get to see the Night Sparrow in her natural habitat. Having finished her hunting for an evening snack, she returns to one of her few ties to current civilization: The humble lamprey stand. Said stand is an efficient way for her to obtain money and promote the selling the of non-bird delicacies, this right here is a prime example of Yoo-kay intellect.
Course there are some that are no more than feral beasts but the more older ones could with some minor disguises here and there fit perfectly into society if they were to ever so desire it! Man is that not exciting? It gives me the shivers mate!
Sadly her business ain't all pure good either, da girly ya see has the ability to inflict night blindness with her sing song voice. And ya see, she's selling stuff under the pretence it'll solve said condition. Get where aye'm going with this boat?
Scam-artism son! the deplorable act of selling someone something which's value is not as true as described. Ya might think that making a little money on the side with your powers might be harmless but I tell you what, powers ain't toys mate. When ya got an ability, it's ya responsibility to take good care of it mate. We've got already enough peppers wanting to hurt us in this blue orb, filling them with some more ain't gonna change nuthing. Nay son, love yourself and your neighbors.
Cause always remember: You's one of our world's wonderful creatures and we love you mate. We all bloody do.
Course the youkai know this but most don't care none, after all they live with a different sense of morality than we humans. Yoo-kay may some of the most smartest creatures almost like men, but just like us they too can commit criminality.
But anyway we ain't here for dat today, we hunters ain't no vigilantes son. Nay we are professional proffesionals and do everything with pixel perfect preparation, we got the perfect tools, the perfect plans, and of course....the perfect entrance!
Behold as the hunter approaches the stand with a confident swagger, there is no fear in their eye. No shame in their approach and their disguise has not been discarded for clearly they are not a human in disguise. They walk past the Lamprey Stand not once, not twice but three times in hopes that the Night Sparrow notices their approach and starts her scam...and she does! See the way a cruel smile arrives on the Yoo-kay's visage and hear the sing song hum with which she attempts to lure her prey. Is it not a delectable tune? Is it not an wonderful tune? FOOL! You've been struck by her charm. Course the hunter has the perfect counter-measure for this, earplugs mate! Can't be charmed if you can't hear the singing!
Anyhoo, progress is going smoothly son, soon Aye'll be able to have an actual conversation with them missy. Can you believe dat? Having a nice chat with a creature of myths? Mate Aye'm so pumped it might as well be a birthday! That's how much fun Iaye'm having right now. Now remember to not end up too excited, for the first impression is the most important in all social interactions. Make the right choice mate, Aye believe in you and maybe one day ya'll be a Yoo-Kay hunter too.
The camera zooms into a good view of the stand, the night bird and the hunter. Yellow clickadoodles appear the moment she enters the store and receives the greetings of said Yoo-kay herself. The youkai is looking straight at her and the only barrier between the two is the stand itself which is at waist height. Perfect for drawing a weapon if stuff gets nasty
"Welcome to my lamprey stand traveller! never seen your kind before~" Da Yoo-kay before me gives a smiling smile before reciting another clearly rehearsed sentence "Of course it doesn't matter where you're from, I shall serve the most delicious lamprey to all who come! My it even cures night blindness did you know that? And all that for only 300 yen~ hm~ mhm~~" she continues to hum her song to no avail as I do not hear a word she says, nay son. Aye'm simply lip reading dem bird lips.
Once again, the video loops into both people just doing nothing for 3 or more seconds, it's choice time son
[x] Aw Shucks! Aye love me some Lamprey mate, I mean madam. Aye wish to CONSUME your merchandise and do not have any doubts towards your person. Nay so-madam, you seem like a fine lady if I say so myself.
[x] No thanks madaaaaam, what aye desire ain't good food or wonderful company. Nay son, Aye wish to learn more about yar body! yer mind! and da soul! Aye wish for you to give me your everything! smile for da camera!
[x] *Slams hand against wooden surface* YOUS SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUSELF MISSY! How dare ye betray the trust of yous fellow men and spite yous own country. Such scams lead to a road some lovely miss should not take. No, no, no sirrette this will not do! Cut the video, this gal's gotta learn how to earn a proper living!
[x] Tranquilizer gun loaded, boomerang at da ready and some good o'l lasso will end this quite swiftly.
Now y'see I'm gonna break modern convention here and I'm going to try and discuss our options because the first update got more than two votes and I'm starved to social interaction.
I think the best option here is to buy something, and see what comes from that, however I also figure that's probably as close as this could get to being boring as sin.
On the other hand, trying to give her an education in the more moral economic processes seems more likely to get our expy Steve-Irwin'd, god rest his soul.
So that, in my eyes, leaves the question of whether we try a bag and tag, or to stun the blighter all verbal like with out easily misconstrued mention of a desire to administer examinations of her person.
My personal choice I think is going to be the latter, but that also could easily backfire if this Mystia is made of sterner stuff and reacts too promptly to a perceived perversion.
>>68432 I agree that the best option is to get the drop in (either by flattery or preemptive strike), but we've already established this ain't no Pommie film.
I also think talking at length about examining the yoo-kay would just creep out/provoke her and get us shot at.
[x] *Slams hand against wooden surface* YOUS SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUSELF MISSY! How dare ye betray the trust of yous fellow men and spite yous own country. Such scams lead to a road some lovely miss should not take. No, no, no sirrette this will not do! Cut the video, this gal's gotta learn how to earn a proper living!
I like this. It's got a solid chance of stunning the yoo-kay through sheer force of will. But even more than that, actively making the world a better place? That would make Steve Irwin goddamn proud.
[x] *Slams hand against wooden surface* YOUS SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUSELF MISSY! How dare ye betray the trust of yous fellow men and spite yous own country. Such scams lead to a road some lovely miss should not take. No, no, no sirrette this will not do! Cut the video, this gal's gotta learn how to earn a proper living! It isn't a Steve Irwin show unless he does something incredibly risky.
[x] Aye, dat some fifty-five-off-in-a-dollar-store bullshitte? She even know how to cook a long 'n slippery one down there? -[x] *Slams hand against wooden surface* YOUS SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUSELF MISSY! How dare ye betray the trust of yous fellow men and spite yous own country. Such scams lead to a road some lovely miss should not take. No, no, no sirrette this will not do! Cut the video, this gal's gotta learn how to earn a proper living!
>>68433 Yeah okay that checks out. Glad I waited now. [x] *Slams hand against wooden surface* YOUS SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUSELF MISSY! How dare ye betray the trust of yous fellow men and spite yous own country.
Oh, ho ho, mates! Aren't ya'all some brave buggadoodles? Aye let's see what'll happen if ye do that eye?
The video continues, and you can see Maxsy feign interest at the Night-Bird's wares while thinking about something, in return the Yoo-Kay is cooking but also shamelessly singing about an anti-human song. Naturally this extremely rude gesture makes Maxsy raise an eyebrow, but she doesn't say more as she calmly observes the girl
Observe as da hunter keeps proper peeper-contakt with da Yoo-kay as she waits for em answer. See da neutral expression on she face and da way le miss stands, she's o' proper guard mate!
Course da same applies for the Yoo-kay lady: sure, she looks like a nice missy, but anything can be impaled like hell kabob if she's miffled enough. Maxsy is at exactly the right distance for that, unaccompanied by anyone else and would certainly make a better stomach flutter than some lil rabbit in her eyes. To the Yoo-kay a human's always a potential meal, regardless of affection. Even more so if they're a feathery one. And that's not slander, no sirrette.
See here's dem apples: Birdiess spent fort the most part of their entire life the same way they started. With zero regard or concept towards morality and deference to the idea of a higher being. Basically, they're nega-canadians with wings. Animals don't typically operate on a sense of morality because nature doesn't really care how good of a person you are. Good karma won't save your kids from an empty food meter and won't stop life from slapping you in the face with a barrage of Denmakou. So technically it wouldn't really be fair to judge dem animal actions based on human morality.
Emphasis on technically...cause as we all know dem Yoo-kays are far smarter than animals and do understand said concept. Ergo she is willingly doing dis with zero shame or remorse and must have been doing so for quite some time.
"Here you go~" with a final hum, the night bird gives the hunter a plate of grilled lamprey. Exactly one lamprey to be specific, it's a stick with fish meat on it and frankly it looks quite yummy to the average viewer, yet Maxsy picks up the lamprey like it could be poison. Looks the sparrow in the eyes and swallows it whole with a single bite as the prolonged eye contact is not removed for even a single moment. The Yoo-kay seems half pleased and half embarrassed at the attention, while awaiting the verdict on the dish...or so one might assume.
The following word-badminton shall enclear this misunderstanding. Hold onto dem seat’s fellas
"....by the dreaded name of the emu, Aye've been humbled" Maxsy puts her arms on the desk and hides her face in it, the occasional sobbing sound can be heard as she is overwhelmed with womanly emotions.
"Ah, wow! you like that MUCH? I mean course, you do! I'm the cook after all~" The Night-Bird clearly possessing a streak of ego centrism quickly dismisses the odd reaction as praise towards her. She is pleased immensely.
"Nay, bruv. Aye've got quite the problem with this dish!" yet the hunter quickly rejects that notion. With a swift jolt she leans over the stand and hisses with a face filled with Straylan fury into the Bird's own like a shakey snakeroo.
"Wha-" Unused to such a swift turn about the Night Bird's face is shocked into place for just a second, after said second it becomes understanding and then anger. Finally, her sharp claws are at the ready "How dare yo-"
"It's that ye hadn't made it for me sooner ay!" before she can inflict a disproportionate retribution the hunter swiftly changes the context behind her sentence. Halting the Yoo-kay before she can strike, as she is stunned once more.
"Ah...yeah of course you do, almost mislead me right there...geez, you should speak more clearly" but once again her face quickly shows happiness at the perceived praise, keep in mind that Yoo-kay are more easily swayed emotionally than most humans due to their lack of maturity. In ruder terms they're professional mood swingers.
"Because then aye would know how good you are at cooking food...that is bad!" yet the Hunter continues to twist the meanings of her words to keep the Yoo-kay of her guard. it may seem suicidal to some, but this is a delicate technique known as Straylan Channeling. By giving her constant shifts between praise and insults we weaken her mental defences and prepare them for the extra explosive finisher of the Down Under .
"Excuse me what, mother-" observe as she is once again angered and is unable to see the following pattern. Soon the Night Dove will be unable to understand the situation and freeze into shock as a result, like a kitty in a bathtub.
"And when aye mean bad, I mean Chuck Norris bad (As in Badass)".
"You know how he looked really really bad at the end of his life mate?!"
"DO YOU LIKE THE DISH OR NOT?!"
"Yous don't know? OH, YOUS DON"T KNOW IF AYE LIKE IT MISSY?"
"I'm not MISSY, I'm MYSTIA also YES you weirdly speaking bush demon!"
"Let me say it this way then, put down the fire, get dem knives out and leave them woods!"
"Oh, you bitch, you went and said it hu-"
"Because yous should be working in the finest restaurant in da world!"
"What the, I uh what th-"
"Just not any world that I live in!"
"...Are you real? is this for real? Did I eat some mushro-”?
"Because frankly, Aye'm jealous of ya!"
"Oh really? Well..." she waits for the hunter to interrupt again.
The hunter does not, and patiently waits for her to continue.
".... I can see why you would be jealous, I'm quite some-"
"And your ability to not give a schmecckle about what ye cook!" before the girl can reply, the hunter lifts both of her arms and smashes it again the wood with a loud bang, and looms over the girl again while pointing the wooden stick at her face menacingly "THIS is not fit for human consumption, no...THIS should be eaten by a higher life form with a more complex palate but also an altruistic drive to save the world from dishes like these....Aye'm just missy joking~ NOT!" she grabs the girl by the ribbon on her neck and presses her forehead against the bird as a domineering tactic. "YOU MATE ARE A BEAUTIFUL BIRDY WITH TALENT! HOW I HATE YOU! HOW I LOVE YOU! YOUS SHOULD BE PROUD OF YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS! YOUS SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUSELF MISSY! How dare ye betray the trust of yous fellow men and spite yous own country. Such scams lead to a road some lovely miss should not take. No, no, no sirrette this will not do! Cut the video, this gal's gotta learn how to earn a proper living! ya hear that missy?! YOU HEAR THAT MISSY BIRDY?! AYME GONNA TEACH YOU HOW TO LIFE DA STRAYLAN WAY! " The Sparrow now completely out of her element ends up intimidated by the shouting stranger and slowly backs off. With a gander at her wings her intent is quite clear: to GTFO.
"That's it, I'm outta here!" And she does, with zero build-up and but a flick of her wings the girl swiftly becomes airborne. Normally most birds require some time to get off the ground, if not a second or two. The reason our Night Sparrow is the exception has quite a simple reason for it. *The video pauses at her form in the sky*
*Picture of all her wings appear* See the wings on her head, back and feet? Though the tallest one barely exceeds 2 ft, every single one of her wings are excellent conductors of the mana in our surroundings. With but a flutter she's capable of summoning the energy necessary to push her upwards and continue her defiance of normal gravity laws unabated. Marvellous it may be, but flight is common in these parts. It's an excellent tool for travel innit?
"God that was scary, never knew plants could get that aggressive. What the hell was that nonsense jeez...." Soon enough she's out of the range of the hunter, cause sadly our Straylan does not have the ability to fly. Seeing how she's not pursued she turns her back to take a final look and lets out a deep breath of relief. Big mistake. "Wait why am I running anyway? I'm the Night Sparrow Apparition! The one that should be running is sh-WAH!"
*The video pauses again* Of course, the hunter has prepared for this eventuality. Like all Straylans do.
Before she knows it, she flies straight into a concealed net among the trees meant for catching birdies like her. It's a huge mist net covered in talismans. Realizing that she's trapped she starts rapidly cursing and attempting to claw her way out of the net to no avail. Detecting the presence of a captured youkai the talismans shine and weaken her presence even more to the point that she can no longer move, had she been of a cooler head then she could have noticed the trap in advance and dodge it alas she did not and so the creature has been captured.
Course there's plenty of stuff that could have gone wrong, had she been the smarter type she would have attacked the hunter the moment she attempted to confuse her, would have noticed that the hunter is a human in disguise alongside the many more ways things could have been different. Hunting Yoo-kay is always a gamble.
"Oi Missy, ya fell for my trap card all right" Aye catch up soon with the missy, having ran with dem Straylan legs.
"What, what, this is your doing?! Let me go dammit! Let me go you stupid jerk! traps are unfair!" She demands you let her go, clearly offended by the trickery but hey what can a hunter do? A trap is far safer than actual conflict innit?
"Is no cheating Mi-Ystiahh, just some Straylan Strategy Missy. But anyhoo that said...."
DEM HUNT IS OVER!
Now that the birdy has been captured, we can save her species. Just go-
"WAIT! WAIT! Where are you taking me? What do you want from me?" She interrupts to demand to know why she's in a cage. "Is it money you want? I've got plenty of those, just please let me goooooo!" and attempts to bribe you.
"No dice missy, we gotta save your race from extinction mate!" Aye reply to the Yoo-kay with a firm tone. "Got a certain male friend of yous species to help you commence the repopulation. Cause you'll be taken well care off too" and gently try to calm her down by describing the stuff that's in store for her. That should calm her right down now, doesn't it?
"I DON"T WANT THAT! I DONT WANT THAT! NO NO! LET ME GO! Someone help me! oh please...." ah, but the missy doesn’t want none of that nonsense like she really don't want none of that so much it might damper me resolve mates...
*The Yellow clickadoodlies appear once more*
Aye mates, it's da choices time again. Dis one's straightforward though: Do you capture the lass or not.
[X] Course ya do, this be extinction we speaking off. The future birdies will thank the miss, its for da world.
[x] Hmmm, bugger. Nay means Nay mates. Saving dem birdies is not worth da pain of one missy bird.
[x] Compromise time, she'll be a free birdy if she mends her ways and gets a boyfriend before she dies of old age.
There are indeed multiple chappies, you'll see it soon after this update.
[x] Compromise time, she'll be a free birdy if she mends her ways and gets a boyfriend before she dies of old age. Passing time, I wanna see the myouren temple put out of business by a single australian brick.
[X] Compromise time, she'll be a free birdy if she mends her ways and gets a boyfriend before she dies of old age.
Excellent bruvs, letsa help dis missy live da Straylan way!
The camera shows Maxsy take out a key and walk towards the cage the Night Bird is stuck in, the moment she gets close enough to it the Bird in a panicked state stands up and shows off her wings, fangs, and claws in a display of intimidation, unsure what the hunter will do to her and not intent to find out. Seeing this declaration of hostility our hunter stops her approach and rubs her chin in thought.
Aw, man, dem lil miss been spooked by lil me. She won't listen none to dem compromise in dis state mates. Aye'm must calm her down first, and Aye got just the thing for it too. Carefully observe lads.
The hunter takes out a large towel See dis towel? Dem humble little body washing tool is going to da the key aspect in calming our birdy friend right down eye. See when birdies be scared and or skooked, some lil bit of duarkness can calm em right down! Cause them birdies know that the covers protect em from intense light and sound and so they trust the lil blanket a lot, it's the same way us humans have dem baby blankets they too can feel safe and comfy when they're covered by it. Now ain't that the cutest thing ever lads?
The shouting of the Night-Bird can still be heard though, but Maxsy doesn't seem discouraged as she gives the camera a thumbs up. After another 3 minutes, the shouts finally stop.
See? Ten bets out of ten kaolas that she's sleeping like a lil princess now, dem yoo-kay be clever yeah but instincts be instincts lads, you throw a ball at a wolf-doggie and big chance be she'll go chasing it. Have a gander for youself.
The hunter gently lifts it up to show the viewers that the Night-Bird has fallen asleep right on the ground, the bird lies lazily on her butt while hugging her knees like a bird on a branch loudly snoring the whole time, she seems oddly comfortable for someone's who's stuck in a cage. Lowering the cover, Maxsy turns around and whisper-speaks to the audience to not wake the Night-Bird up.
What a majestic sight, that lil birdy fell sound asleep lads. So shhhhhhh, it'd be a real shame to wake her up just so she can shout and scream at us once more. So, tell you what? Aye'll just go ahead and skip this to some time ahead.
See ya in the future lads, or at least barely a few seconds ahead if me editing is d-
*The scene suddenly changes to a different place, that of a rural village in the middle of a festival. There are coloured lights everywhere and people wearing robes alongside masks while having fun together as they enjoy the mood. Next to some other food stalls the Night-Bird is shown once more with her own, serving customers left and right with more varied foods than simply fish-meat sticks. She seems rather calm but on the occasional moment she can't help but look around her surroundings as in fear of something that could creep up on her at any time or any moment.
She's right to feel this way, cause Maxsy Hunter is but a mere roof away. The hunter is on her belly and not making a single peep as she's observing the Night-Bird before addressing the camera once more.
Top of da evening of ya lads, it has been a while, hasn't it? or maybe a few seconds to you guys? Who knows, anyhow I've wanted to let you know that the rehabilitation progress is going smoothly lads. Been three solid days since she vowed to mend her ways and so far, she's doing good lads. She's not scamming anyone right now nor is she indulging in trashy cooking and that is a big progress...the only remaining thing left is repopulation mates.
Eh, Aye'll give her a month for that. Getting some boyfriend ain't no easy deal and Ay'me no cupid either.
Anyhow....The hunter gets up, dusts herself off and points at the sky with a single finger.
Aye declare this....
The sound of something being launched can be heard.
Several flickers of light appear in the sky above her.
And fireworks go off at exactly that moment, Maxsy does a victory dance, but no music comes out of the audio. Seems she either forgot to edit some music in or maybe your version of this recording simply doesn't have it.
Or she's just doing a victory dance for the sake of doing a victory dance, you will never know.
The result screen appears on your screen as this scene loops.
Time: 03:15:41 Straylan attitude: 5500 (No weapons used; Yoo-kay reformed) Yoo-kay love: 40000 (Yoo-kay has not been harmed in any way and their life has been improved) Secrets: 0 (None were found) Danger Zone: 7400 (Combat avoided, still risky as all hell)
Rank: S Total: 173753 (New record!) [x] Play Mission again. (No need, you've got a S for Straylan rank after all) [x] To the scene selection! (And choose a new mission at your joint).
Beautiful grassy fields of Gensokyo's lands are shown in the background while calm music plays. The image of a racoon dog and some other odd animals like unicorns, crows and varouis more yoo-kay are onscreen in their animal or object form as their image gets highlighted whenever the viewer puts their mouse/remote on said option.
Welcome to the scene selection lads, this is the...uh the scene where you select a scene. Lemme say that again.
Welcome to the scene selection lads! this right here is the hub area where you get to choose on which Yoo-kay you want to focus on next, just aim your device at the animal and we will have a chappie devoted entirely to it.
Additionally there are also some extras if you care for those, like bloopers and behind the scenes (One example being the exploration of Maxsy's gear and pet shop if you ever tire of some animal fun. I hope you enjoy this!
 Umbrella Missy: Heard dem's a bounty on a kertain twoubleshaker. Let's catch da miss like a pro-hunter does!  Lampad Fairy: Of all em fairies, der'es only one marican among em. We oughta fix that extinction threat!  Mermaid: We all know dem fish missies, luring sailors to dead is unacceptable lads. We oughta stop dat!  Lion-Dog: Dis girl's no trouble, but damn does she be adorable. She deserve her own harmless chappy for sure!  Calico-Maneko: Some cat-girly making shady business deals lads, also super rare. We know what to do here!  Write in (Not recommended since some 2hus will be WAY harder to catch than these, and I'd hope for a gradual escalation from easy to hard but if you really want a certain person then go ahead, just make sure it's a Yoo-kay)
Extras: [X] Dem Yoo-kay hunter base: Get a lil trip around me pet shop lads, see dem materials and some creatures that have been captured before this. A small interview with our sponsor included. [x] How to be a Yoo-kay hunter: 10 easy steps for ya to become a Yoo-kay hunter too! See how to earn ya keep, get dem equipment and not become one of many faceless goons. [x] Bloopers: Failed attempts of capture before.
 Lampad Fairy: Of all em fairies, der'es only one marican among em. We oughta fix that extinction threat! Murica HELL YEAH [X] Dem Yoo-kay hunter base: Get a lil trip around me pet shop lads, see dem materials and some creatures that have been captured before this. A small interview with our sponsor included. Happy New Year, and great quest
 Lion-Dog: Dis girl's no trouble, but damn does she be adorable. She deserve her own harmless chappy for sure! [X] Dem Yoo-kay hunter base: Get a lil trip around me pet shop lads, see dem materials and some creatures that have been captured before this. A small interview with our sponsor included.
Fairies ain't going extinct any time soon, and the doggo is a good girl yes she is.
Twas supposed to be one at a time but duck it, teeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeext time!
[X] Dem Yoo-kay hunter base: Get a lil trip around me pet shop lads, see dem materials and some creatures that have been captured before this. A small interview with our sponsor included.  Lion-Dog: Dis girl's no trouble, but damn does she be adorable. She deserves her own harmless chappy for sure!
The moment you click that tiny house in the corner, the screen flashes yellow for a second before the words "Heck yes!" are heard. The house becomes larger and swallows the screen as everything turns to black
A loading screen follows with a still image of Maxsy using a box-trap with a piece of ham underneath it to lure a darkness yook-ay in it. Beneath the image the words: Yook-ay love meat, make sure your own is 5 feet away though! are shown. As the loading screen progresses, the grue gets closer to the trap and the screen shifts again.
This is the prime opportunity to go grab a snack, as the whole process lasted 2 minutes. This recording is indeed not one of the highest qualities but hey, the only you're paying with here is your attention so it may be better than no-
The camera shows a beautiful summer afternoon on a Japanese village shown from an eagle's view (Ergo from above). People are walking around in stride; stalls are being tended to and overall life seems pre-hold on did that person over there have multiple tails? How odd, no one else seems to mind or care about some flying figures either.
A solid brick house is shown, though rather big it's stature and design seem no different than the many other wooden houses in the distance, it has a roof with patterned tiles on it, several windows, and a door and in hindsight all houses have these things so why don't we skip ahead to the interesting titbits about this now don't we?
Said house is further away from the other houses, literally at the edge of the village even. "Pet Shop" is the humble title on it's roofboard (With the image of 3 tailed cat too) and indicates its clear purpose. Through the clear window one can see a bunch of various items such as food for animals, toys for animals and hunting equipment.
There's also a shack just behind the store, the kind where you would put in horses or other kind of animals, but the camera doesn't linger long on it so neither should you, ignore that shack. It is not important in any way.
Now would be the time where you'd be introduced to the voice over once more, but the camera seems to linger on the shop for some reason. Why is that? Where could Maxsy possibly be? Let's try pressing more butto-
"You's beautiful!" ah there she is, our hunter is on one knee as she passionately confesses her feelings to someone "Mate Aye'm in luv with ya, dem orange peepers that sparkle like stars...dat delicate body that would seem like it'd break if Aye hugged it..." Uh...yeah, she's certainly saying some stuff and the people nearby just ignore it and keep walking as if this is a common occurrence.
"Oi, oi, oi, ain't that too much?!" some orange haired child with a weird get up is blushing at the remarks. She's wearing some big straw hat alongside chains on her wrist and honestly who would dress their child like that ever?
"No, touching won't be enough! Aye want ya to be with yous foreva! Would yous live under da same roof as me aye?" even so the hunter continues her speech, bearing her heart out to the wonderful maiden before her.
"Gyaaaaah! So honest! I love it!" seems like it's not backfiring though.
"So, what will your answer be?" both ask to someone else.
Before me lies da most beautiful little thing in de world, with its soft black fur, perfectly aligned body and wonderful two tails Aye can confidently say that I've never seen such a wonderful kitty-catsu in me life before coming here.
Like a dream came true, the lil snivly hopped out of nowhere and ever since then I've been entranced by her. She's the perfect woman surpassing any other Bombay in da world. Inside them golden peeper lies a big sauce of intellect and them pretty ribbons on her head show me that she ain't no random woman, nay this woman is a lady and deserves to be treated like one.
"What are you waiting for? Go show her the thing already!" Me mate renders me out of my stupor, and Aye comply as fast as Aye can as Aye look for it in my pockets "Come on, go faster, you can't ruin the climax now! She's almost yours!"
"Aye, aye, gimme me a sec!" after some more struggling Aye finally find it, that piece of deluxe fried fish. I stretch it forward with much effort, forcing my shaking hands to hold it in place "Please accept my feelings!" and offer me love personified .
The angel shows no response, simply sitting in place all relaxed. Somehow, she seems amused even.
"W-what's your response...?" Aye say shyly once more while me mate watches supportively on the side just as anxious as me for da gallies answer.
The dame considers your offer, slowly walks towards your hand and....just pauses and looks in your eyes.
Please say yes! Please say yes! ACCEPT ME FEELINGS KITTY CAT
Bites down on the fish, allowing me to caress its soft mane in the meantime! It shows you it's love personified!
"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" tears come down me eyes, as a feeling of pure bliss showers through me like da venom of a shakey snake except this venom be love and joy personified!
"You did it! I'm proud of ya Hunter!" Me chum, gives me a hearty slap on the back with a laugh "It's just like you said, species and gender are nothing more than trivial obstacles!" Aye'd reply but Aye'm too focused on the love personified before me.
"Tiffany! Yer name is Tiffany! From now on ya're me Tiffany!" Aye pet the cat while smiling brightly "Tiffany! Aye swear on me mum that from now on Aye'll definitely make you happy!" the Kitty-Catsu mews back in joy and oh my god I could die now.
"Excuse me but shouldn't you be working right now?" someone says from behind me, in a dismissive tone. As Aye turn around it turns out to be a woman with silver hair and a bento box for a hat "This isn't the time for strange games Ma-"
"Are yous calling my once in a lifetime confession a weird game!?" it doesn't matter if it's the landlord or anyone else, but Aye won't let anyone dismiss me time with Tiffany as such a sordid grump "Apologize!! Apologize to Tiffany! Don't get carried away just because you have horns and a nice tail once a month!"
"That's right, that's terrible! How dare you half-beast look down on it, this isn't just a one-night thing, no this is transcending the barriers of species, it's real...!" me compatriot supports the cause, and truly understands it.
The Landlord’s brings dem hand to her face and sighs out loudly, "Hey, Sh sh!" before scooting Tiffany who runs away in fright, never to be see-
AH?! "Wait, don't go! Tiffany! TIFFANNYYYY!" It's too late, the love of me life disappears just like that. With me heart torn apart Aye lay on the ground dead inside and tears streaming out "...T...I... F...." for the first time in me life Aye'm hit by the venom of despair personified.
"How could this be..." me bruv sadly speaks as she eats the rest of me fish stock "To miss Tiffany, this encounter was nothing more than an affair. How disgusting people can be...." then she turns around and kicks me right up bum "Anyway get on your feet already, this kind of thing happens in life, but you shouldn't let it break ya, at least hold the sadness in ya and get them loooooooooooooove out of another woman. Move on and be happy!".
Life is sad, though Aye've finally obtained the store Aye've always wanted. The exotic Pet Store, in other lands this dream wouldn't be possible due to the fact most exotic animals are illegal, not to forget the many financial issues.
Issues Aye've solved by using my strong body and Straylan origins by hunting monsters for fat cash...that was all nothing more than a ruse, an excuse to be closer to the creatures that Aye've loved so much. For the sake of my dream...
The dream of owning a Yook-ay Pet Store! It'd be a job where Aye can be surrounded by those adorable animals and hand them over to other people that love animals as well. That would be my dream, or at least so Aye thought.
"I'm here cause you're still in the red by the way" the Landlord speaks out of nowhere "So even if you wanted to accept more animals you couldn't. Not to forget how easily attached to them you become, even though the mere idea is ridiculous.... if you're going to sell pets you should be ready for them to leave, giving them names only makes that harder now, doesn't it?" her words are reasonable, but they have a big flaw behind, one Aye can't ignore.
Aye get up and face her "A real Straylan would never be afraid of naming their loved ones, no matter what you say I'm not going to stop naming my children"
"Hm! You humans would never understand that, when one's resolved to do something...the word impossible might as well not be there!" those words would be very supportive if me bruv weren't drinking at the same time. still thanks laddette.
"I don't really know nor care what you mean by that, but that's not what I'm here for" Miss Landlord lets out a huff and looks at me again while ignoring me bruv "Like I've said before, if you keep acting this way your store will become bankrupt" ah she's right about that..."As protector of the Village I deemed it necessary to remind you of this".
How kind of her, but she's indeed right. Me store loses money every month because..."Aye always have to start by explaining to the costumers how wonderful pets are..." this world didn't have a pet culture to begin with, ain't that wacky? Yous keep a dog to train it how to hunt at best but other than that, no pet salamanders, no pet buns, only utility but no looooooooooooooove for them critters in this world...
"Well normally no one would raise magical beasts, yoo-kay are the enemies of mankind after all. No matter if they're a little girl or some small tanuki. They're something to be supressed or exterminated at the worst of times" the Landlord gives me exposition on stuff I already knew, before taking out a paper. "By the way...why don't you read this for a sec?"
Hm? Aye accept it "It's just a notice...Someone's been sneaking into the horse stables and brushing their hairs, please be careful of this suspicious person huh, how is this relev-"
"Please keep reading" Landlord gives me a smile that shows she's this close to giving a headbutt if Aye refuse.
"Okay, okay...." And there's another incident "There have been sightings of disposed disguises on the roadside, fellow travellers have been sharing rumours that if you see a bush behind you, it'll mean you'll disappear soon. Patrols around the village have been increased as a result for safety. Please do not travel on your own during these times Oh..."
"Do you see what I'm getting at?"
"Yeah, looks like the Tengu have entered their breeding season! This is the prime oppor-" the force of a thousand anvils collapses against me forehead, instantly flooring me arse into dem ground. "Ow...." why would she attack unprovoked though?
"Don't play dumb, I'm saying you're responsible for these incidents, aren't you?"
"Tengu...Aye'll definitely catch one for sure!" Aye declare at the heavens and get picked up by the landlord as a result.
"Listen when I speak to you" ah, she's angry now. "You've been here for 2 months or so already, in that time we've given you food and shelter and even the opportunity to get a job, haven't we?" Aye nod at the memory "And what have you been doing with our generosity? why you've borrowed money from the Hieda and opened a failing shop. A shop you're not even in most of the time cause you're off risking your life with the youkai wildlife under the pretence of hunting isn't that true?"
"In me defence, Aye do get money from it on occasions. Sometimes some yoo-kay that's unremarkable but still a-"
"I don't need you to tell me what I already know dear, I'm just saying that you need to get a more serious job" Is she implying my dream is garbage? That's awfully mean of da lass. tears appear in me eyes. "No, don't give me that sad face, no that's going to do anything stop it" fine... "Now look, I'm just telling you to keep things in mind cause otherwise...".
"Else you might have to close your store by the end of the month" She reveals the bad news.
"Excuse me what?!"
"What? *hic* sorry I wasn't listening, what happened?" Bruv gets up from the wall, goddamit she's drunk again too.
"When you can't pay your debts, those who own it can just take your stuff as re-"
"Aye know how bankruptcy works! What Aye'm asking is why yous of all people are telling me this now!"
She pats her head for some reason "Cause you're hard to track down, besides you should have already known this had you read the letters sent your way...but anyway that's my warning done. You've got a month to get Ten Million Yen, if you're unable to reach that goal then your store shall be seized as collateral to repay the loan"
"Eh? Wait, wait, wait! you don't mean the "Pay up or we take your house" kind of collection?!" Bruv is late to understand.
"Oh noooooooooo, Aye'm doomed, my dreams going to be stamped on all too soon, dooomed be meeeeee!" the despair sauce personified hits again as Aye sob on the ground like a lil wanker. Life is bad mates.
"Hey, calm down, I'm not done speaking! There's still hope you know. Where did your talk about resolve fly off to?" Landlord tries to calm me down to no avail "Look, I'll help out dear, so you're not on your own here! Don't give up yet".
"Wh-u-w-Sniff" I get up and look her with eyes now red due to leakage "There's still hope? Really? Promise?"
"Yes, there is. But uh..." She looks at her surroundings, people have stopped to watch the commotion "Why don't we talk more inside the shop huh? Give me a little tour while you're at it, really get a look at what's disposable and whatnot".
"Ah, uh sure. Course, it's right this wa-Oi where you're running off to bruv?" She's walking away for some reason.
"Eh? isn't it obvious?" She turns around when you call for her "If it's money ya need, then I've just gotta go get some!" bruv...that's such a nice thing to do but...
"Don't you dare!" Aye refuse her aid immediately, knowing her she'd just crush some sand and make diamonds out of it or whatever instant money method "Aye thank yous for da feeling but a real straylan fixes her own messes, it's no good if Aye make more debts to solve other ones!"
"Hunter..." A smile grows on her face "Keheheh, fine be that way. But don't come crying to me later kay? I won't help you out no matter how hard you beg afterwards are you okay with that?"
"Course Aye am!" and the reason is..."Aye'd never have made it this far otherwise, get out and have fun ya scamp! I'll see you later" waving goodbye at the japanese moblin who's gone off to probably get wasted somewhere, Aye let the landlord in me house.
The camera shifts to the inside of the shop, the things that are most noticeable to the eyes are the various rows of products such as pet food, pet toys and other silly things like talismans and traps to use. There's also a cashier at the office which has a bunch of posters at the wall behind and a trap door that leads downstairs. The room itself is rather large and has mirrors on the edges of it in case someone tries to steal stuff.
Also, there's a bunch of cages with magical beasts in them, from weird insects, to oddly looking creatures such as a dog with three heads, and man-eating plant and Rumia all proudly displayed to those who'd enter the store, their cages are of course impossible to break through and everything is 75% percent safe, probably.... just shush.
"Hold on a moment" the silver haired guardian interrupts the presentation as she points at the last cage "Why is Rumia in there? you better have an explanation for putting a Man-eater inside the Village Miss Hunter!"
"Huh? Oh, yous mean da freeloader" I wave my hands sloppily "Eh, it's kind of a boring story, just an easy capture you know? Nothing more, nothing less" and don't see the problem in having her here.
"Don't act like this is normal!" Alas the miss won't have it "Rumia isn't some weird looking fish that you can sell for display! She's an actual threat to the humans here if she were to be ever set loose, what were you thinking?!"
"Sorry, sorry...so you want her to leave I assume eye?" Aye nod and take out the key to open her cage "Okay, there you go" and swing the thing open, waiting for the creature to wake up "Come on, wake up and get out you bugger!"
"Hmmm? who called me a parasite just now?" ah, there she goes again. Gently rubbing her eyes as she jumps out of the cage with a yawn comes Rumia, a veil of darkness enshrouds her shortly after. "Whatever, is dinner ready? I'm starving here so it better be garbled meat again slave..." says the one that came out of a cage earlier...
"Nah, there's no more dinner for you. The miss over there wants you gone from here" Aye explain to her, glad to be able to be rid of her for now.
"Ah, so you finally found me an owner? that's great! I can't wait to be spoiled with sweet treats, go on beautiful walks and sleep all day!" misunderstanding the situation, she goes ahead and approaches the madam "Hello M-oh hey Keine! Didn't think you'd be some lonely loser that needs a pet but please take good care of me!" she says some terrible words with a bright smile, regardless of her appearance the fact remains her personality is terrible.
"...." Miss Keine just turns her head to me with a blunt look that says Explain this, right now.
Aye shrug me shoulders again "There are a lot of violent animals in this earth, but still if you train them properly, treat them well and shower them with love those animals will respond to that love, that's what I believe with all my heart"
"Ew" She doesn't even mince her words "I'm expecting a more coherent answer here, hurry it up".
"Aw come on, those words were super cool, weren't they?! Can't you respect such a dream?"
"It's a dumb dream but I'm not here to judge that" You just did! "Now give me an answer before I'll get the impression you put little girls in cages for terrible terrible things and will have to act appropriately".
"Well, uh, she's just a pet you know?" honestly, what other reason could there be. "She's a rare specimen".
"Yeah! I'm a wonder of the world!" the freeloader sees the words as praise "If anything the fact you get to feed me and serve me should make you happy. You should be bowing down to me or dancing with jourgh!"
From the sound of her hitting the floor, Aye assume she got headbutted by Keine. Soon after the darkness vanishes, and that theory is confirmed as Rumia lies on the floor dazed with a big ouchie spot on her head.
Hint: Don't mess with Keine lads, she can break a rock with dat big forehead!
Keine picks her up over the shoulder "I'm going to kick this child out of the village, in the meantime don't you dare go anywhere else capiche? I'm not done talking with you yet" her words are firm and demand absolute obedience.
"Yes Madam!" which Aye give to her since she's a scary lady when she's angry.
"Good" Aye walk out of the shop with her and wave her goodbye once she heads off with the Yoo-kay in tow.
Once she's no longer in sight, Aye head back and sit down on a seat while thinking about her words.
>"You've got a Month to get Ten Million Yen, if you're unable to reach that goal then your store shall be seized as collateral in order to repay the loan"
Ten Million yen in that amount of time...If Aye were to cut dat in 31 days then that means Aye've got to make....
10,000,000 divided by thirty-one is equal to uh...I don't know let's get out a calculator.
Still no idea how that's worth, but fine let's do it another way. Conversion!
Ten million yen is equivalent to 7682,00 euro. Cut that apart by 31 and you get 247 euros a day or something. Let's round it up it up to 250 and multiply it by 31 and you get 7750,00 euros.... wait no that's wrong too!
Gaaaaah, Aye don't get it! Aye don't know how much money Aye have to every day from tomorrow on! (Not to forget personal expenses and stuff but holy moly is that one hell of a math trip no one wants to deal with so forget that)
But it's okay, that's just a problem that the future me must handle. Right now, Aye should focus on how to make my store better and what it is I'm lacking currently.... a mascout!
That's right Aye'm lacking an iconic mascoutt! someone's who's presence will bring in customers and make people recognize the brand from miles away, if Aye can get someone cute to posture as one then my dream is as good as saved!
But who? Who could possibly be a good enough person for such a role?
It'd have to be someone nice, lest people are driven away by them. (So no to Rumia)
It'd have to be someone's who's clearly not a malevolent Yoo-kay (So double no to Rumia)
It'd have to be someone who's fluffy and potty trained and various other stuff. (So triple no to Rumia)
Just no ever to her, but now that these conditions are clear.... there is only one person for the job.
"Lion-Dog...." the camera shifts to Maxsy jumping off her seat and pointing a finger at the sky "You shall be mine!"
Look at dem solid stone step lads, they're perfectly aligned with one another and the way they lead up really gives off the impression of scaling the steps to heaven. That Crimson Toori also looks like a wonderful checkpoint and them whole blue skies and green trees bring freshness to me art. It's like I'm in an art piece lad!
.... AAAAAAAAAAH, it'sa so wonderful mates. Aye might cry even! sorry, sorry but really emotions be welling in my chest because this really looks like the art of my favorite artist and here I am really in said art and it really is a strange moment. When all this art you really admired turns out to really exists aye just.... ah give me a second.
Ahem, thanks lads. Really this place stays as beautiful no matter how many times I see it.
Though the second most beautiful thing of em all was da journey to get here, sure twas skipped to save some time but aye tell you mates the roads leading up to here is filled with wondaful beastly maidens. Shame aye had no time for em so aye had to use some of them repelling charms to keep em at bay. Again, real shame but that's the job but if I weren't working right now then one of my most favorite things to do would be to just wander around and see what kind of people I could meet, as in not even go to the most well-known places but to sort of just wander around without a direction.
Aye really love to see the tiny quirks that yous might see in dem daily life in an entirely different place but really this is the kind of stuff that's really exciting elsewhere when otherwise all yous do is stay home or wander around the places you know with the back of your hand for safety. Nah, it is seeing these places like this that fuel my soul.
If that's even a thing.... but yeah, it's wonderful. It just feels so nice to be here I can't even convey it that well.
Hell, yous should try and visit yourself sometime! I'm sure it'd be amazing and if we ever meet lads then oh boy would I love to show you around, but that's enough chit and chats, let's go get some Lion-Doggo boyos!
Where is she anyway? *The hunter scans the surroundings as the camera goes over it. You the viewer however get to clearly that there's a certain Shrine Maiden at the top of the stairs drinking a set of tea right next to a bunch of Komaunu statues. The fact Maxsy did not see them should be impossible unless she's blind*
Aye, I don't know see nuthing mates. Looks like Ay'me need yous help laddies.
Do yous all see anything of interest? *Several clickadoodles appear as Maxsy faces the screen like Dora the Explorer
[x] Approach Shrine Maiden Casually, she's the boss of this joint and probably has custody over the Lion-Dog.
[x] Approach Doggo statues, one of em must be the right person! you're sure of it! here doggy doggy~
[x] There's no third option, what else can you do anyw-ah stop clicking on me! Okay sure this counts just stop please! (This'd count as the write in option, in case you got a specific plan in mind)
Dat's right mates, let's go take a kloser mander gander at dem statues!
Dora the explorer gives the iconic thumbs up to the camera before walking up the stairs slowly but carefully like nothing is wrong, the Shrine Maiden at the very top of it does not seem to notice or perhaps simply not acknowledge the hunter at this distance....which is a thousands step kind of distance, turns out the camera simply has a better vision than our protag and that from her angle only the Toori at the top really is visible to the human eye.
Vision aside this shouldn't really be a problem, exception being the stairs.
Fuck stairs, seriously look at her go, it's been a solid minute and she's not even halfway there.
Huh....Huuuugh, hooooooooo mama! those are some big stairs friends, the kind of stairs that if you were to fall down from you'd suffer more than just a humble bruise and lou, nay this would break you harder than if Opray Winfrey were to sit on ya back! All kudos to dat Lady course, she's a wonderful person bless her heart and so are yous friends.
But where was Aye? Oh yas dem stairs, them stairs be dat kind that'd make an athlete blush like a tomato, dese stairs be the wrong kind of stairs sons, like if these stairs were people...then them stairs be mean people?
The kind stairs that if Aye were to be a ghostie poo, Aye'd believe they lead to the gate of the glorious kingdom of heaven, shame that ain't da case but that place is for a later chappy anyway, them landscapes are a wonder.
Keep in mind that she's been scaling the stairs this whole time, and you can visible see almost no progress even though she's walking at quite a fast pace. As if to make it even weirder, the distance further ahead seems blurry to the camera but Maxsy makes absolutely no mention of noticing this, could this be the work of an enemy youkai?
Hmmm, Maxsy stops for a moment, rubs her chin and taps the ground with her biggass brown boots as if to think
Stop dem flames son...why's it taking dis long huh? snot natural lads!
Something saucy's going on around here fellas, me instincts telling me dat aye may be in some slusion of some kind. Now mates fret not, if this slusion was da bad kind then aye'd know by now, but nay this is not for fear or hunting.
This must be the work of an...some pixie barbie mates! Aye, them barbies be nasty pranksters round these parts.
The Camera shifts to the surroundings but other than Maxsy, the stairs and the general surroundings everything else seems quite blurry if not very hard to pay attention to, you could dismiss this as special effects if you're cynical.
Maxsy turns to the camera once it closes up to her and starts talking again with an energetic ray of joy. Course they don't mean too much of dem bad stuff, but even so this is mighty inconvenient at me current time innit bruvs? She pauses for a moment as if waiting for the viewer to say yes or not, then moves her head to agree with them
Aye! Very inconvenient, can't get some doggo if aye can't go up dem stairs now can I? course that means one thing...
Aym'e show y'all how to deal with a barbie prank like dis one, pick ya clickadooodle and see how things turn out!
*The video pauses at Maxsy's smiling face right before she was about to blink and the choices appear once more*.
 When ya in some trap, all yous gotta do is lure em barbies right out! take out dem bikkies and chokkies son!
 Dem barbie smegick ain't dat stronk son, get on dem fours and sprint up dem stairs like Usain Bolt! Straylan Power!
 Them barbies ain't too smert, just fake trip and play the broken omellette and them barbies will feel bad about it.
 Nay to all dat, sometimes the best way is to frighten em, take out dem fireworks and loud noises and bam!
Aye put down me backpack and prepare da secret weapon, like Aye've said before lads sometimes the right tool can make all the difference in an hunt, and boy do Aye have it.
Hunter turns to the camera as she holds the item with both of her hands zelda style
Behold a lolipop! see it's shiny red feature! It's like an island of strawberries! Look at how it glistens in the sky, any child in a 100 feet raduis would detect this wonder! Can you see those beautiful white lines surrounding it mate? it's hypnotizing!
At this point you might be tempted to simply skip ahead to the good part, as the fact that almost everything seems worthy for a description to the hunter becomes blatantly obvious (just press Fast Forward to do so)
Now here's dem apples: Lollipops are candies perfectly fit for summer and a popular brand of candy for all ages. See dese elongated sticks of sugars are carefully designed to make people morbidly obese. They come in candy and ice lolly formats. Other types received trial runs, such as dollipops (lollipops made from discarded dolls). Following disturbing complaints about dolls’ eyes glaring back with bleak dissatisfaction from within the lollipop, manufacturers stopped this practice since then.
But the best thing about dem lolis are: They’re for all ages! There’s nothing to stop a 101 year old from indulging in a lollipop, but the foodstuff is more commonly associated with children (especially young children, as opposed to old children, or man babies who never grew up), teenagers, people during a heatwave, and certain species of antelope but most definitely fairies, just wait and see!
To those who are perceptive, you'd notice that Hunter's backpack is slightly moving as she continues to speak, oblivious to this robbery in progress the girl continues to speak on and on about her infallible master plan.
Out of it come three lollipops, as if by held by an invisible force a bite mark appears on one while the other two slightly shake as if giggling. Like a straight man both gigglers are hit on the head to silence them yet absolutely no sound is heard from any of their interactions. But these unseeable and unhearable rapscallions do not stop at the consumption of these sugary conducts, nay they attempt to lift the very bag itself and skedaddle with everything in it.
The hunter turns around out of curiosity, on cue the trio drop the bag instantly before she can see.
The hunter stares at the bag "Huh, is it me or did me bag move a bit?" and rubs her chin in suspicion.
The bag does not move, for it is a bag. Those cannot move on their own and so nothing suspicious is to be seen.
Convinced by this universal truth, the hunter shrugs "Must be da wind.." and holds out her lollipop trap out again, confident that someone will fall for it. (Hint: No one does, the fairies have learned about those manoeuvres already).
The bag moves slowly again, being dragged closer to the ground this time with a methodical pace, slowly but surely it'll reach the bushes to the side and then the bag is as good as theirs. All they need is pa-
The hunter turns around again, sees the bag travelled a noticeable distance and...
[x] Dismisses the view as something totally innocent (And secretly follows until they remove the illusion for a perfect view of the private fey life~) [x] Takes the bag and puts it back right where it used to be, resetting the progress. (Teasing the lil thieves in the process and indirectly taunting them into doing something bolder for an easy capture~) [x] Wastes no time and runs at the bag while screaming loudly (intimidating the fairies into running away! no time to waste on small fry, the hunter has to hunt a bigger dog today~)
[x] Takes the bag and puts it back right where it used to be, resetting the progress. (Teasing the lil thieves in the process and indirectly taunting them into doing something bolder for an easy capture~) We're a broke lass. We need Yookay to sell. Four for the price of one trip will help.
[x] Takes the bag and puts it back right where it used to be, resetting the progress. (Teasing the lil thieves in the process and indirectly taunting them into doing something bolder for an easy capture~)
We must fill the cartoon humor quota for this mission. It is mandatory.
[x] Takes the bag and puts it back right where it used to be, resetting the progress. (Teasing the lil thieves in the process and indirectly taunting them into doing something bolder for an easy capture~) We can use them as bait.
Aye, it moved allright. Dem wind is strong round here golly" The hunter picks up the bag, and puts it back at it's proper spot. Unknowingly resetting the entire progress of the triple trouble rousers as a side effect.
Then she goes back to her talk, only for the bag to slowly start moving again.
Surely a third time's the charm, except not as the hunter notices the bag again.
"Okay yous know wut?" And goes ahead and sits on the blasted bag "There, now dem wind can't possibly take it from Aye!" afterwards she lets out a laugh, cause she's having fun even now.
That'd make her the only one though. Three little girls with bug wings appear behind her, the pouts on their faces clearly show their frustration at failing to acquire the sweet, succulent sugary delights.
*A voice over interrupts the scene, pausing it on the image of the three girls:
These girls are no ordinary girls by the way, nay these are known as barbies or fairy if you want to be specific, I'm sure you're familiar with the folklore behind those and so far that's pretty accurate. If you're not then let me make it short: Fairies are embodiments of nature itself. This nature can be anything from leaves, water and even something abstract such as pretty starlight or what have you.
Course, there's more to that but honestly would you not rather see a barbie closer and then talk about it? Yeah, one should first be caught before we can continue that so keep your eyes ready.
So deep is their frustration, that the blond one has forgotten to keep up their invisibility. Though that is a big mistake to make, fairies need not learn from them cause their lives are eternal anyway.
But they do not suffer their loss for long, for soon they debate amongst themselves. Loudly even yet no sound comes out of their mouths, lucky for you viewer we can translate the language of lips.
*An extremely bad fandub appears over them for the viewer to enjoy, as in what should be the voices of three young girls is instead dubbed by an older man with a Straylan like accent*
"Candy in bag, but bag no longer free" the leader of the trio speaks, with her red autumns hair and clothes emphasizing her bolder nature. "If bag not free, then dem crackies cannot be ours".
"Dat's bad idea son, bad idea bring bad result too. Let us be content with what we have" the lesser blondie girl says, with her white clothes and yellow hair her temperament is clearly less so...something.
"Nonsense Luna, clearly this is our opportunity to put an end to the barbarian human ideology of the equitable distribution of resources!" says the last member, with her black hair and blue clothes she seems to be most passive yet also devious of the group. "Or are you scaaaaareeeed?"
"No, I'm not!" Luna shouts back defensively immediately.
"Fi Fo Fum!" The red haired one laughs and joins the taunt "Yes, you are chicken. Buck Buck Buck!"
"I am NOT!" Blond girl pouts even more at that, "No human can scare a fairy!".
"For we prank them instead!" Black hair adds and then pushes the girl towards the Human "So go ahead, make a proper example. Distract the human as we take the loot! Show bravery!" observe how she calmly attempts to manipulate her own friend with a care free smile on her face.
"No dice!" But the Blondie refuses "Besides, if we speak bravery...isn't Sunny fit for that?"
"Huh?" the so called Sunny stops her chicken noises, and brightens up "Of course, I'm the bravest. I'm the leader and a leader fears nothing!" and does not realize what she set herself into.
"Hmm.." the Black one thinks about it "Guess, you're right. This is more fit for the leader yeah~".
"Thank you for your volunteering boss!" Luna jumps in as well "Go distract the girl then, and we'll take her bag as a resu-oh no...." but stops mid sentence as her face goes white and she's in shock.
Both of her companions slowly understand what the problem is. "She's behind us isn't she?".
Luna nods yes, and loudly gulps. "Y-yes".
They both turn around and see the Outsider all smiles wielding an...
Well, they don't get to see anything as suddenly everything becomes dark.
And one of them is caught.
But which one is it?
[x] Sunny Milk [x] Star Sapphire [x] Luna Child. [x] Clearly all three of them (You greedy capitalistic pig).
All dat was needed was nothing more than a lil towel over their heads and now here they are struggling in panic because their peeper-vision has been snatched from em.
See, Barbie-poos aren’t de brightest creatures in da woods so whenever something happens that they’re not familiar with they kind of happen to mentally shut down for a few seconds like one of em computas that turn on en off again.
So da easiest way to capture one is to use a trap or then capture them super fast!
And Aye really mean super-fast super-fast cause once dem little missies get them bearings back they’ll realize that they’ve been tricked and they’ll skedaddle!
Making any capture thereafter frankly impossible, cause of a simple reason…
Because being bright and being smart are two different things lads, in fact barbies are considered one of the few most adaptable species of youkai because they’re part of the rare few natural phenomenon’s that can actually learn to use if not create their own tools for dem benefits.
*A clip of an fairy using an vending machine is used to highlight this as an example*
In fact barbies are capable of learning so many things that there have been attempts to weaponize em!
No dat's no joke lads, some peppers really thought that dem barbies could be powerful if used right!
And the reason why is quite obvious!
Because their high solidarity (Which is if documents are to be believed, even higher than those of humans), lack of fear (Because they’re immortal) and adaptability could potentially make them one of the most powerful forces if they had the wisdom and discipline to work together. Of course these attempts have only been met with failure because fairies are inherently child like and fickle so the odds of them following any command that doesn’t give an immediate benefit is non-existent.
Fairies simply do whatever they want, whenever they want it. No amount of training can change their base nature so they would make very poor pets to those who are not able to give them plenty of attention or expect them to be a convenient living tool for hunting or other purposes. Though if you give them plenty of time and patience then the fairy will start to like you and the more an fairy respects it’s owner then the more obedient they become as a result. They’re basically winged puppers with da personality of a kitty cat but da heart of men’s best friendly friend friends.
Respect da fairy and da fairy will respect da you (the occasional prank will still happen though).
Exposition aside Ay’ve retrieved my bag now and will be using the perfect tool to extract them girls from their current *trap* without harming them in the process, and that thing happens to be…
[x] Me humble Trang-gun, BANG! BANG! BANG! And into dreamland they go! [x] Dem big bad bottles, that’s no joke lads. Putting fairies into bottles is an old-age tradition! [x] Just shove them in da bag, it’s simple, efficient and also sneaky [x] Actually nah, you’re here for a doggy and dem feys can be captured later anyway.
Sorry for the delay, I was embarrassed by the bad update before. But here I go continuing this anyway since that mistake won't happen again. Anyway after this choice we’ll go get some lion-dog time I promise. Thanks for voting and reading so far.
Okay, let’s do this! With swift decision making and quick reflexes, Aye take out me big bad bag of ingenuity and quickly shove dem little barbies one by one into da bag like they’re made of candy.
*Maxsy jumps at the fairies with her bag out, knocking them down onto the floor like bowling pins. Stunned by the move, she quickly grabs a leg under the cover and starts the capture process*
Of course, they don’t go along nilly willy with this. Which is why yous must be very careful since most of the times they start kicking and screaming, which is a normal panic reaction most barbies have. Course it may be scary but don’t get agitated or you may the girl in the process which is a big no no.
Fear not for me though cause for that too Aye have da SOLUTION! WAP! WAP! WAP! Just gotta give em a good lil raffle wazzelr on da backies of them headiess and night night dem little beauts go!
Now with them resisting no more. Let’s put them in da bag and be on our way! The Three Fairies of Light have been Captured! Do be careful though, until the main mission has been accomplished escape attempts are not impossible. Though if you manage to keep them, then a bonus will come afterwards.
*Cue the camera showing the surroundings distort for a moment, only to return to a normal state with Maxsy back where she was and the Shrine Maiden still at the top of the Shrine* Now then, with these girls out of the way. Let us skip ahead to our actual target.
*The video fast-forwards with visuals of Maxsy going up the stairs, giving the Shrine Maiden a small greeting who returns it in turn before approaching one of the komainu statues. That was only 3 or 5 seconds skipped at the most*
Behold da Lyan-Doggo in its natural habitat, firmly standing on top of this spot. This magnificent creature follows its noble duty of protekting places that have sacred value. For Lyan-doggos are not only yoo-kay but also guardian schmirits. More specifically they ward the place against evil smirits which in dem fantastical lando hookies like these are the main cause of illnesses, bad luck, and any other bad thing.
Course, the most notable features about these creatures are them manes and them bods but why point that out in stone when da flesh is much much better, just give it a second and aye’ll have her.
Now, assuming that the girl is in a good mood we should be able to approach her with no problem. Assuming that this statue is the girl, it’s a hard thing to recognize since most of them tend to hide.
One problem though: How does one approach a good girl?
[x] Be nice and polite, approach the statue like you would any dog. [x] Bait and waiting, lion-dogs tend to be shy. Get her out first. [x] The Shrine Maiden’s watching, why not ask her for help?
Lost interest in this story rn, so putting it on hiatus for the moment.
Then again I've got like four stories going on at the same time, so I'm going to reduce that number first and foremost (Kill Kaguya and Esp 1.5 should both be ending soon) and afterwards once it's just this one and the Rumia one I'll have more time for this.
Ergo, I'll focus on the former 2 stories first before going back to this one.
This isn't cancelled, just stalled. Expect this to come back in 4 weeks or so.