[Return]  [Bottom[Last Update]
Posting mode: Reply
(Reply to 68326)
  • First time posting? Check out our site rules and FAQ.
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG, WEBM, WEBP.
  • Maximum file size allowed is 4096 KB.
  • Images greater than 200x200 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • View catalog
Show or hide post box

 ►
Hide Thread
Watch Thread
Expand All Images
File 163106532460.jpg - (1.80MB, 2719x4021, YeahBitchIWokeUpLikeThis.jpg) [iqdb]
68326
Your name is Reimu Fuck-Mothering Hakurei the 16th, and there's an incident going on. You can tell because the author is a hack, who probably can't even make this shitty trope work, much less anything with actual characterisation, or depth. That however, is besides the point, because as was previously mentioned: Incident. Your job is resolving those probably. That still leaves the ever so pressing question however of where to start.
Deliberating on the issue, you stare into the sunrise like a badass before deciding to:

[] Get a goddamn move on, you have places to go, youkai to exterminate, there's probably a space hamster in there somewhere.
[] Sit here and look cool until someone comes along to exposit at you. Maybe the stage one boss will clear themselves by tripping on a rock if you stall long enough.
[x] Conjure goasts.

Let's get spoopy.
File 163106694830.png - (49.13KB, 130x324, 130px-Th13Yuyuko.png) [iqdb]
68328
>>68327
Youki's words echoed... "There's a time and place for everything, but not now."
[X] Sit here and look cool until someone comes along to exposit at you. Maybe the stage one boss will clear themselves by tripping on a rock if you stall long enough.

But what if... we are the stage one boss?
File 163107510278.jpg - (10.21KB, 301x168, Gangster.jpg) [iqdb]
68330
[x] Gather fellow protagonists to fuck shit up together
[x] Get a goddamn move on, you have places to go, youkai to exterminate, there's probably a space hamster in there somewhere.

Gather homies, Fuck youkais, gain faith and "donations", blow up SDM mansion, insult Yukari's age. All in a day's work
[x] Gather fellow protagonists to fuck shit up together
[x] Get a goddamn move on, you have places to go, youkai to exterminate, there's probably a space hamster in there somewhere.

If we don't get a space hamster, then by anon I will vote for Shinny to be the pet!
[X] Get a goddamn move on, you have places to go, youkai to exterminate, there's probably a space hamster in there somewhere.

The sooner this bitch job is done the sooner we can start to bitch relax our vacation.

MAKE THAT CULPRIT BUY THE FARM LOKE A SUCKAH, MAKE EM GENUFLUCT GOOOD!
[X] Get a goddamn move on, you have places to go, youkai to exterminate, there's probably a space hamster in there somewhere.
Calling vote for
[X] Get a goddamn move on, you have places to go, youkai to exterminate, there's probably a space hamster in there somewhere.
File 163112089096.jpg - (469.25KB, 995x750, ThisIsGensoukyoImReimuFromHakureiLandOfTheMaidensY.jpg) [iqdb]
68335
[X] Get a goddamn move on, you have places to go, youkai to exterminate, there's probably a space hamster in there somewhere.


...Ah screw it, sooner you put down the dozen or so it is this week the sooner you can go back to sleep. Cant be that hard anyway, especially with how everyone else has become a bunch of pushovers lately. Only thing to do know is decide which shot type to use against today's shitheel, and hope this isn't another 12+ hour resolution.

[] Cleansing Sign, Pursuit Type
- "Homing Amulet"
- "Purification Rod"

- "Fantasy Seal"
- "Youkai Destroying Strike"

[] Extermination Sign, Rapid Fire Type
- "Sealing Needle"
- "Extermination"

- "Unpaid Needles"
- "Demon Binding Ring"
[X] Cleansing Sign, Pursuit Type
- "Homing Amulet"
- "Purification Rod"

Homing shots are the ones that require the least effort from you. that means you got more time to dodge or kick a hoe in the shins. TEACH these SUCKAS how to be a real SPELLCARD MASTAH!

Also you got to break their teeth with your rod, best of both worlds.
[x] Fist Sign, Punch Type
- "Left Hand of Pain"
- "Right Hand of More Pain"

- "Fist in the Fucking Face"
- "Pierce the Heavens"

Ignore pussy options, play hardcore.
File 163113789630.jpg - (805.85KB, 1600x1200, IllPierceYourMum.jpg) [iqdb]
68338
>>68337
I'll allow it because I really like Gurren Lagann.
[x] Cleansing Sign, Pursuit Ty--

Oh, we doing custom loadouts? >>68337

In that case
[x] [b]Eternal[b] Sign, Slayer Type
- Super Shotgunhttps://youtu.be/IO1smOedNTw
- The cruciblehttps://youtu.be/fPYzDjbHbew

- Fantasy Heaven https://youtu.be/Z5eZJ2VGQQE
- "They named her: Youkai Exterminator"
Aaaaand after my post, the page refreshed and OP comment visible I see it's not actually as free-range as it looked to be.

So, my vote - when no meme loadout is intended - goes to the pursuit type. >>68339
[X] Cleansing Sign, Pursuit Type
- "Homing Amulet"
- "Purification Rod
[x] Cleansing Sign, Pursuit Type
- "Homing Amulet"
- "Purification Rod"

- "Fantasy Seal"
- "Youkai Destroying Strike"

Homing is the obvious option.

In case of meme options: [x] Fist Sign, Punch Type
Let's play the fighting games.
[x] Fist Sign, Punch Type
- "Left Hand of Pain"
- "Right Hand of More Pain"

- "Fist in the Fucking Face"
- "Pierce the Heavens

We God Hand now
x] Fist Sign, Punch Type
- "Left Hand of Pain"
- "Right Hand of More Pain"

- "Fist in the Fucking Face"
- "Pierce the Heavens

Hell yes for Godhand!
File 163118101349.jpg - (717.79KB, 700x1030, HakureiStyleMMA.jpg) [iqdb]
68344
There isn't anything that can actually pose a threat to you, and this probably isn't even a meaningful incident, so you don't waste time getting your tools, instead deciding to use your bare hands.
Taking off, and flying out over the forest of magic, you slowly start coming across fairies, weaving past their barrages and all but eviscerating their formations. The few who are not immediately reduced to mist by your flurry of blows don't even get to escape, instead being grabbed, either to block a shot or be used as one, even the poor nameless midboss merely lasts long enough to feel the pain from your unyielding knuckles.
Eventually, as your massacre finally runs out of targets, you feel the breeze pick up...

[] Take a moment to enjoy it and cool off before the first boss arrives.
[] Look around for the source, this is clearly youkai trickery.
[x] Look around for the source, this is clearly youkai trickery.

NO PAUSE, NO MERCY, ALL SHINTO RAGEEEEE!
[x] Look around for the source, this is clearly youkai trickery

Sus
[x] Look around for the source, this is clearly youkai trickery.

>>68346
Curses on you. Thousand curses, lots and lots! Damned be you and your kind, kith and kin. Forever and ever, pain eternal. You cross-eyed rascal, you stinking ne'er-do-well.

My mind, my memory, was free, untainted by this drivel and here comes along you, croaking youuu, croaking this vile, cursed three-letter word. Curses on you and may your grave be a toad's pond.
>>68347

Ok Suwako you uber-boomer
[x] Bare armpits to deploy MAIDEN SCENT.
It is the only way.
Wtf did I just read
>>68350
Presumably, a story on THP.
[x] Look around for the source, this is clearly youkai trickery.

Mamma Hakurei would be proud. Now go kick the shit out of weakass fan.
Throwing your gaze from side to side, you hurriedly try to find your next target, flying forward as you scan the surrounding skies and the forest canopy until... There! A faint shine in the tre- PICHUUN
A pair of high heeled loafers collide with the side of your face like the fist of an oni, launching you down to the forest floor, where your fall is barely broken by the leaf litter, your opponent landing a ways in front of you, and starts shouting angrily.
"Hey hey hey hey hey! Listen up you demon miko, having left her homeland she never yields, never retreats, and never regrets! You face the great Wriggle Nightbug!"
"So if I catch you it'll be a size record? And you wont even run away when I try? I wonder if there's a cash prize for finding the biggest firefly in gensokyo."
"No! There's no reward for catching me! I'm going to end your reign of terror once and for all!"
"Then I'll just have to squish you instead." You answer, clearly enraging the gnat who immediately attempts to close with a fierce axe kick, only narrowly missing as you dodge out of the way, your own blow evaded in turn. The two of you dance across the clearing, back and forth, neither able to decisively hit the other, until Wriggle finally remembers she has danmaku, keeping her still for long enough that you can land a devastating right hook on her face, knocking her out cold. As you're about to recite a one liner, you see something out of the corner of your eye, turning to see a ghost holding some metal device.
Then you see nothing.
File 163127174554.jpg - (459.78KB, 1126x1582, MyWriggleCouldBeatUpYourWriggle.jpg) [iqdb]
68360
Forgot the image.
Epic lass, can't wait for the next update!
File 16315412085.png - (242.93KB, 600x700, ItWouldPayTheBillsIfIHadAny.png) [iqdb]
68363
You, are employed. As such you could not possibly be Reimu Hakurei, and anyone thinking otherwise should probably see about getting their head checked; no, you are at least presently going by Sakuya Izayoi, Head Maid of The Scarlet Devil Mansion. ...And speaking of employment your employers have been acting rather out of sorts lately. It would be quite concerning all told, if they paid you enough to care. Or at all for that matter, but they don't, so you figure they'll get over it eventually, even if its even effecting Ms Knowledge. Speaking of which, she appears to be coming this way, if the sudden weight of the air, and every sound that isn't her footsteps fading out are any indication, so you think you would rather not deal with that.

[] Finish cleaning this window first, but you're unwilling to deal with someone who pretends to be smart when they forget that they can just call for you.
[] Alternatively, as distasteful as the idea feels you could leave your work unfinished, and hope it tricks her into thinking you'll be by this way later.
[] Write in
[X] Stop time to clean the window.

[X] Leave afterwards
File 163155261132.jpg - (15.07KB, 425x248, IMG_20210913_190248.jpg) [iqdb]
68365
[x] Stops time
[x] Cleans window
[x] Doesn't elaborate further
[x] Leaves
[x] Pretend to be the carpet.
I know nobody still around today ever read FoSL but fuck it.
File 163171062641.jpg - (727.11KB, 1290x907, CourtesyOfElbowGrease.jpg) [iqdb]
68367
You stop time, continuing to clean the window as you do so. Its a shame honestly, you enjoy the view from this one either way but its so much better in motion. Still, anything is better than dealing with Patchouli at the moment, you don't know why she's been so strangely thespian lately but its making her hard to deal with.
At least that devil she keeps around to help manage the books is still bearable, so you haven't had to go out of your way too blatantly to avoid the magician.
Speaking of which, what was it you still had to do after this? Oh, right,

[] Your Lady mentioned wanting her tea around this time today didn't she? You had best get on that.
[] There was a small influx of new hires recently, and you should check on them. Hopefully none of them have tried to take up permanent residence in the bath again.
[] It has been a while since you last checked on the younger sister, and you doubt Ms Knowledge will look for you there.
[] Write In
[X] It has been a while since you last checked on the younger sister, and you doubt Ms Knowledge will look for you there.

Flan time
[X] Your Lady mentioned wanting her tea around this time today didn't she? You had best get on that.

I'm something of a Remi fan myself.
[x] There was a small influx of new hires recently, and you should check on them.
>not voting faeries
shiggy
[x] Patrol the SDM mansion for any object that might lead to a giant explosion

Just in case this become a true touhou manga
Someone break the tie, I don't care if you voted previously, but I cant write an update until a choice wins,
[x] It has been a while since you last checked on the younger sister, and you doubt Ms Knowledge will look for you there.
classic flanfag victory
>>68373
Thank you anon, very cool. Vote called for Flannister Railing.
did it died?
>>68380
No, it just tripped on me needing a break for unrelated health reasons and is still nursing the bruise.
>>68381

Big oof, good luck with your recovery and we will diligently await you.

Take care and hope you're not suffering.
>>68381
Ouch. Well, it happens. Get well soon.
File 163425206492.jpg - (107.32KB, 695x843, The Esteemed Little Sister Of The Devil.jpg) [iqdb]
68391
The younger Scarlet it is. After a brief detour through the kitchen to prepare a light meal you approach the basement and descend its steps, approaching the door to Flandre's room. Knocking gently you enter with the tray, welcomed only by the back of her chair and the quiet sound of her stroking Tupai's back.

[] It is only proper to allow Imouto-Sama to speak first.
[] But on the other hand she may appreciate knowing who just came in, if she hasn't worked it out already.
[] Write In.

Hiatus, what's that? Can I eat it?
[x] Genuflect
It is only proper for a meido
[X] But on the other hand she may appreciate knowing who just came in, if she hasn't worked it out already.
Introduce yourself, Sakuya. Don't be rude meido
[x] Barge straight in like a SWAT raid

This quest is for fucking shit up, we shall fuck shit up.
[x] But on the other hand she may appreciate knowing who just came in, if she hasn't worked it out already.

Milady, your Monster Energy.
File 163468803468.jpg - (1.16MB, 1997x2048, __flandre_scarlet_touhou_drawn_by_hisako_6anmbblfn.jpg) [iqdb]
68396
Of course, being the dutiful maid you are you announce yourself, causing the young mistress to spin in her chair to face you.
"So it was you after all Sakuya, put the tray on the table and talk for a bit," Flandre urges, "I've been wanting to talk about something with you anyway."
"As you may have been able to tell, I'm bored of how the mansion is; under my sister's leadership our bloodline grows weak, and we are taken as jokes even as others plot their own schemes. This is not something I can continue toi allow, much less in a time of turmoil as this. Now, when Gensokyo is at its weakest, now is when we must strike. Do you understand where I am coming from Sakuya?"
You do not. Its all onmyōdō to you, even if you dont say as much.
"I am not asking you to aid me in this Sakuya. Merely to not interfere."

[] What in the world is she thinking? That idea is terrible.
- [-] Tell her in no uncertain terms that this idea is terrible
- [] Give her the look. The one with the raised eyebrow.

[] Aid the young mistress in her endeavours.
- [] Flandre is powerful, but she has far less practice. Aid her directly to be sure she comes out on top.
- [] Her abilities outstripped her sister even before recent events. Far more pressing are other potential problems like... Patchouli. Ugh.

[] Do not side with Flandre, your loyalty is to Mistress Remilia and her alone. Also it sounds like a lot of work.
- [] Get to the presently less than at her best scarlet moon and attempt to convey the severity of the situation. Now.
- [] You'll deal with this yourself. There isn't anyone else in the mansion capable of dealing with this right now, so you'll just have to do your best to make her next 495 year imprisonment be spent in a hospital bed instead.

[] No.
- [] You aren't paid enough to deal with this shit. Even if you dont have vacation days saved up either Remilia will let you negotiate them retroactively or you quit.

[] Write in.
[X] Do not side with Flandre, your loyalty is to Mistress Remilia and her alone. Also it sounds like a lot of work.
- [x] Get to the presently less than at her best scarlet moon and attempt to convey the severity of the situation. Now.
[x] No.
- [x] Should I quit being a maid?
File 16347178041.jpg - (161.78KB, 600x600, Im for side flandre.jpg) [iqdb]
68399
[X] Aid the young Mistress directly.
[X] Make sure she comes out on top
[X] But the moment she goes too far, install a Coup D'Etat.
[X] "I was never on your side".

I for one welcome our new overlord, but honestly I feel it's safer to supervise this new phase of hers directly to make sure she won't cause any real permanent damage to the house or anyone else she cares about.

Flandre is strong, super strong but this may really just be a minor tantrum she's throwing like the be overly dramatic scarlet bloodline within her asks her to.

Also fuck yes for social upheaval! It sounds fun and chaotic as hell for Reimu to get into if she ever does!

#Youngersisteristhebest side.
[x] No way, ojou-sama
worst vamp shut up
[x] Aid the young mistress in her endeavours.
- [x] Her abilities outstripped her sister even before recent events. Far more pressing are other potential problems like... Patchouli. Ugh.

Not as eager as the other anon, but if this lets her mess with Patchy then I'm for it.
Due to a lack of clear consensus I'm extending the voting period for another few days.
Vote, change your vote, discuss voting, whatever.
File 163481740590.png - (283.16KB, 678x588, reading patchy.png) [iqdb]
68403
I haven't voted but I'm not sure what to go for. I'm leaning towards not helping Flan because she's a dweeb but am open to persuasion. Plus Sakuya must be loyle to her ojou-sama.

Captcha: knowledge
[x] No way, ojou-sama
[x] Quit your job

The explosion will be inevitable
File 163482008353.gif - (2.60MB, 498x280, knowledge-tai-lopez.gif) [iqdb]
68405
>>68403
This was a sign Anon. you vote must be for something involving Patchouli.

>>68404
And yet even as the destination remains the same, your path ever changes.
[X] Help the Flan (Except you're still loyal to the Remy, sabotage the Flan).

[X] Screw over the Book Nerd.

I'm only doing this just so I can see Flandre go "Sakuya...why? I trusted you!" with tears in her eyes.
[X] Do not Help Flan
[X] Warn Remilia about it.

Backstabbing a little girl is just a new low.

Don't see why you'd quit your job either.

Be a good maid Sakuya
>>68402
tbh, you kind of overcomplicated what's essentially a yes-no question. Right now, the votes lean no, just with slightly different bents. You have every right as author to take whatever interpretation you want out of a weak consensus.
>>68407
The title include 'Fuck shit up', we must follow it!

Also can ya give the 'Good girl' status back to Sanae please? Thank you.
>>68409
Reimu fucks shit up because she's dumb.

Sakuya is a reasonable person who says no to dumb shit.

The duality of (wo)man.
[x] Aid the young mistress in her endeavours.
[x] Patchouli option
I'm blameless because I was encouraged by the writer.
[X] Embrace the Flan
[X] Reject the Nerd.
Girl's are now deciding. Please wait warmly.
[Return]  [Top]


Delete or Report
Delete post []
Password  
Report post
Reason  

- Took 0.01s -
Thread Watcher x
Reply toX