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[x] You can’t really refuse this level of desperation. Looks like it’s tea time at Miss Margatroid’s home for all of you.

There’s no reason not to go with Miss Margatroid. She hasn’t proven herself to be dangerous in the slightest — and even if she is, you have Mori and Hina with you. Hina does seem hesitant, but you get the feeling that if she really didn’t want to have tea with Miss Margatroid, she would say it bluntly like she does everything else. Instead, she’s relying on you for some reason. It’s possible that she could be conflicted between following you or Miss Margatroid, since you had something for her to do first. If that’s the case, then there’s no reason for her to prioritize Hatate over anything else. Whatever damage could be done by the indignantly lazy crow tengu being in your apartment has likely already happened, and then some. You just want her out sometime today so you don’t have to sleep next to a shut-in birdbrain.

However, since you don’t feel like going back home to deal with Hatate yourself, you might as well accept Miss Margatroid’s invite— even if it was only out of politeness and/or desperation. It would be interesting to see how a magician lives, anyway. “I’d like to accept her invitation,” you tell Hina, “but I don’t know why you’re letting me decide. If you want to drink tea with her and chat, you should drink tea with her and chat. If not, then refuse.”

Hina wavers, glancing away from you. Maybe your direct approach lacks tact, but Hina acting so troubled over a pleading invitation is surprisingly ordinary for her. She didn’t seem like this at all when you invited her over. “I would not want to be a nuisance on any one or any household susceptible to misfortune,” she says. “However, I feel that ignoring an opportunity to converse with someone who shares my craft would be a mistake. If you are with me, PI, it should be enough of a buffer to prevent any calamity from befalling Miss Margatroid’s home.”

Wonderful, more misfortune talk. “A buffer? So the misfortune will only affect me, then? I can’t say I feel comfortable about that.”

Hina smiles. “That is why I have something for you.” She reaches into the familiar basket dangling from her left arm. After feeling around a bit, she produces almost an exact replica of the doll she gave you before. “This is a little sturdier than your last one,” she explains, “but I must admit, it is likely I will have to keep making these for you. Fortunately, I will not run out of material any time soon. Ever since you moved in, I have been retrieving and saving the clothes you throw out.”

Putting the disturbing recycling aside for now, it doesn’t comfort you to know that you’ll be constantly ruining dolls that are suppose to be able to hold misfortune. “I find it hard to believe I’m that unfortunate,” you mention, before quickly adding, “all the time.”

Hina’s lips curl upward and her whole face becomes alight with joy as she replies, “You are, I assure you. Misfortune runs through you like blood. I’m continuously fascinated by it.”

Her hungry eyes make you grimace more than her words. This misfortune stuff may have been concerning before, but now you can’t even bring yourself to worry about it. After all, your fate is your fate. It’s not like the idea that your life is shit has been elusive; you caught on to that pretty soon after moving out here. It’s Hina herself that is starting to worry you. People who cling to abstract ideas like “sense of self”, “history”, and yes, “misfortune” tend to be dangerous in your experience — and they always have some bullshit in store to back it up.

But before you can hazard even a word to Hina, Miss Margatroid takes care of it for you. The tall blonde suddenly pops up between you and Hina, her eyes dazed and fixed on the tiny cloth replica of yourself. “Is this… an original? It’s even better than your other works! To so accurately reproduce the unremarkable nature of his apparel, the wrinkled darkness of his eyes, and his particular scowl… I should have expected nothing less from an expert of the needle!”

This is insanity of a different sort. “Is my scowl that particular?” you remark dryly.

“Of course it is,” Miss Margatroid insists. “Half the challenge is finding a proper model. The other half is representing it.”

Hina watches the excited dollmaker’s pale lips curiously, and then turns to you. “PI, would you please accompany us for some tea? I would like very much to learn more of dollmaking from Miss Margatroid.”

“Fine, fine,” you relent. “I’ll be your buffer, if only for both your sakes.”

Hina claps her hands together lightly. “Then it is decided. I would be honored to accept your invitation, Miss Margatroid.”

“Truly?!” she squeals, before taking a breath and restraining herself to a composed smile. “Thank you very much. And please, call me Alice.”

You can’t help but feel like you’re going to be the third wheel here, but at least you have Mori — if you can shake her out of whatever funk she’s in. “Lead the way then, Alice,” you tell the giddy blonde.

Alice turns to you, her blue eyes staring blankly as if you were nothing in her sight. “I was speaking to Hina. Please continue to address me with the proper honorifics, Mister Tsurugi.”

Hopefully the tea will be warmer than she is.


You’ve followed Alice into what you recognize as the Forest of Magic, though it’s different from the path you take to Kourindou. Your guide walks with Hina ahead, chatting about something — with the former doing more talking than the latter. The distance they’ve put between them and you offers a chance to address something that’s been going on for a while now.

“My hand’s getting sweaty,” you remark.

Mori glances down at her hand, still attached to yours since you first saw Alice, and finally releases. “Oh. I didn’t even notice. I just kind of… did that.” She forces a laugh. “See, you’re totally fine with holding hands! It’s almost like we’re actually—”

Even her misdirections are suffering. “Knock it off. What’s wrong with you and Alice? You’ve been quiet ever since we met her today.”

Her smiles fades, and she heaves a sigh. “It’s nothing, I promise.” Under your disapproving gaze, she clarifies: “It’s a personal problem. Instinct, I guess you’d call it.”

That’s a curious explanation. “Instinct? You mean something to do with—”

She lightly shoves you to cut you off. “No no no! Don’t worry about me.” Then she grabs her face, stretches her cheeks out hard, and lets go in order to psych herself up — or something. “I’ll get over it! It’s stupid, I promise. You should stay focused on Hina and Alice. Aren’t you curious about them?”

“I do want to make sure Hina’s not going to get wrapped up in anything even more ridiculous than she usually is,” you reply, “but for better or worse, you’re my number one responsibility. If you ever need to use my hand again, just don’t make a scene about it.”

Mori stares at you, and then smiles. “Thanks. You’re actually a sweet guy, aren’t you?”

“There’s nothing sweet about it,” you mutter, quickening your pace to flee before she gets back into the swing of things.

However, she catches you and wraps her arms around your lower back, squeezing against your side. “There isn’t much I would change about you, PI. Really.”

“Then you don’t have very high standards.”

You feel her laugh. “I know.”


It almost surprises you when the forest gives way to a prim-and-proper cottage. Despite being tucked away in the heavy, gloomy air of the forest, it’s a well-kept building: the grass is trimmed, the paint looks fresh, and the windows would surely sparkle if there were any noteworthy amount of sunlight that could make it through the thick canopy of trees. A small stone well sits adjacent to the home as a source of water, with a wooden bucket hanging on it.

“This is your home?” Hina asks. “It’s lovely — like something out of a fairytale book.”

Alice laughs nervously. “Thank you. Maintaining it provides an excellent exercise for my magic.”

You’re not really sure you would learn magic for the sake of landscaping, but you’ll keep it in mind. “Come to think of it, we’re deeper in the forest than I thought,” you mention. “Shouldn’t I be getting sick?”

If it’s possible to shrug with only the face, then Alice just did that. “Humans differ in their tolerance to the magical spores the local flora emit,” she explains, as she steps up to the door and rummages through the pockets of her dress. “If you made it this far, you should be fine.”

That begs the question of what would have happened if you had not been fine, but you’ll let it go unasked. Instead you turn to Mori, who smiles back. “Don’t worry PI,” the goddess says, “I know you’ll be fine.” Then she winks. That means she must be responsible somehow.

Alice unlocks the wooden door, and then holds it open gingerly for Hina — much less so for you and Mori. The interior is just as tidy as the exterior, and very Western in an old-fashioned sort of way. Unlike Hina, she actually does have furniture and utilities: a couch and coffee table, wooden dining table and chairs, and an iron stove. If it weren’t so dark because of its location, it would be a nice, cozy home for a human.

The door closes behind Alice, and she strikes a flame inside a droll lantern hanging on the wall — properly illuminating the room and providing a meager source of heat on a crisp day. “Please be at ease in my home,” she says, as she moves across the room. “The door to your right is the washroom.” She stops in front of a door on the other side of the couch. “Here is the door to my workshop and study. Follow me, if you will.”

“I thought we were just going to have some tea?” you speak up.

Alice doesn’t even bother to face you. “Yes, and what’s inside my workshop will make that happen,” she responds. “It’s not worth explaining to you. Just follow and watch.”

You and Mori exchange nervous glances, but Hina seems unfazed. “After you,” the fortuneteller insists, as she walks into the darkness without hesitation.

The first thing you do when you enter Alice’s workshop is recoil backward instantly from the sight of at least twenty pairs of tiny eyes, all lined up along the wall. All of them belong to small dolls sitting on wooden shelves, and you can’t help but notice that they have blonde hair, blue eyes, and pale skin like their creator. Do all dollmakers like to use themselves as a model?

“There are so many,” Hina remarks in amazement, as she approaches the dolls, “and they’re all so well-made. My own materials pale in comparison to yours.”

“I consider them like children,” Alice replies proudly. “However, I can’t help but feel like they lack something. In your own works I see heart — something I may have lost long ago.”

Hina stops, and for once she frowns sadly. “A heart, you say? How ironic,” she murmurs.

Alice must not have heard her, because she walks to a desk and flips open a large tome. Mori stays still, but you approach the wall of dolls beside Hina. “I wonder what it is they’re made of,” you ponder out loud, as you reach out and pluck one of the dolls off its shelf. It’s a lot heavier than one of Hina’s rag dolls, and its black frock, white apron, and pink bows seem tailor-made for this particular doll. You don’t quite understand what Alice meant by “heart,” but it does feel rather cold compared to Hina’s more homey cloth dolls.

You feel Mori tug lightly on the back of your shirt. “Um, PI. You might want to put that back.”

“Why? I’m not doing anythi—”

Then you notice the pressure of all those beady little eyes staring directly at you, and freeze. At first you think it’s an optical illusion, but when you step back every single one of them follows, staring down at you emotionlessly.

The doll in your hands blinks. “Unhand me at once,” she sa— it says in a high-pitched, yet indignant voice.

You immediately release the doll, only to be even more surprised when it doesn’t fall. It rises slowly into the air, gradually accompanied by the others. You notice that they’re fairly similar in size and appearance: all have long blonde hair, blue eyes, and some kind of of dress. Then, they all soar out of the workshop like a swarm. In the other room, you hear cabinets start opening, dishes being set, and the sound of fire.

You turn to Alice for some kind of explanation, only to find her in a trance. Staring down at the open tome on the desk, her hands sweep through the air like a conductor — but not just her hands: her fingers too are pushing and pulling so quickly and precisely that you can’t even track their movement.

A doll floats back into the workshop, stopping in front of Hina. “This way, please,” it tells her.

Hina nods to the doll and steps back into the living room with it. After one last look at Alice, you follow her, with Mori tagging along behind.

The cottage now has a completely different feel to it than when you first walked in — a mayhem of organization, is what you would call it. Dolls float around nearly every spot in the house with a blank smile, all doing some kind of chore: dusting, beating the curtains, wiping the windows, fluffing the pillows. However, the majority of the dolls seem focused on preparing for the tea party. A whole squadron of them places the tablecloth down and begins setting the saucers and cups, while several dolls emerge from outside carrying a bucket of water. Three more dolls carefully heave small pieces of wood into the fire, while another group carefully places the kettle on top of the stove.

“A puppeteer,” Hina remarks with awe. “Incredible. It must take a peerless amount of skill to handle this many at once.”

However, Mori doesn’t seem nearly as impressed with the display. “Is this really what that girl sold her soul for?” she murmurs.

“I can’t even imagine that one person is controlling all of this,” you say. Yet, as you look closer, you start to see the signs. Every task they do is perfectly coordinated and flawless — more like little machines than people. Watching a nearby duster in particular, you notice she even blinks at specific intervals. The only thing that throws you is the lack of strings connecting Alice with her puppets. Strictly out of curiosity, you use one finger to lift up the hem of her dress and inspect—

—nothing, because two other dolls fly into your face and scare the shit out of you before you can get a good look. Their rigid smiles contrast sharply with their shrieks. “P-pervert! What do you think you’re doing?”

The voice comes from all three dolls, but now you recognize its source. “That sounds like Alice, doesn’t it?”

“Well, yeah,” Mori answers matter-of-factly. “Did you think they actually talked? She must be using ventriloquism. You know what that is, don’t you?”

You sigh. “Yes, I know what ventriloquism is. I just didn’t even think it was possible on that level.”

With their innocence guarded, the three dolls get back to work. The kettle on the stove starts whistling, and you notice dolls steadily finishing their tasks and returning to the workshop. A group of dolls lifts the kettle off the stove and begins filling the teacups on the table, while another distributes small cookies on each saucer.

It’s at this point that Alice emerges from the workshop, looking a little red in the face but standing tall and smiling proudly. “Unabashed lechery aside, I hope you enjoyed a little of what myself and my children are capable of.

You and Mori just stare at her, while Hina offers some light applause. “I enjoyed it very much,” the fortuneteller comments. “I am far too clumsy for puppeteering, but even I can recognize mastery when I see it.”

Alice bows, showing the slightest amount of humility toward her object of affection. “Thank you. Now, I believe tea is served.”

Even though Alice is out of her trance, a few dolls still hover around her. Looking closely, you can see her fingers still moving, just not nearly as vigorously as before. A doll floats to each chair and pulls it out graciously, and you approach the chair closest to you cautiously.

“Miss Margatroid, I have to admit that I haven’t frequented many tea parties. What’s the etiquette?”

She looks at you, which is a plus, and tilts her head in confusion. “I’m afraid I don’t practice much etiquette, besides simple hospitality. I… never learned as much.”

Sounds good to you, so you sit down and examine the steaming cup of tea in front of you as the others follow suit. The tea is incredibly dark — almost black — which is way different than what you’re used to.

“Is this European tea, Alice?” Mori asks, just as curious about the tea as you are.

Miss Margatroid,” she corrects her, before answering, “and not quite. It is a unique kind of leaf I brought with me into Gensokyo. I’ve been trying to cultivate it here, but with little success.” Then she gives a long sigh. “As I should have expected.”

Trying to grow tea leaves in the Forest of Magic does sound like a lost cause. Worst case scenario is that you end up growing a tea youkai or something.

Then you hear the distinct sound of sipping, which is strange, because the tea is still boiling hot. Of course, it’s Hina who has casually raised her cup to her lips. While the rest of the table gapes at her, she sets her tea back down and smiles at Alice. “It is bitter, but rich with a distinct flavor. Might I have a cookie to go with it?”

Alice blinks a few times, clears her throat, and then shifts her fingers around. “Of course! Here you are.”

A doll brings a cookie to Hina, who happily accepts it. “Thank you,” she says to the doll, which bows and returns to orbiting Alice.

Since Hina is munching on a cookie after drinking boiling-hot tea, Alice is shocked into a state of awkward silence, and you and Mori are just along for the ride, it seems that this tea party is off to a fantastic start. It might be prudent for you to try and begin the conversations, and hopefully Alice will carry it on. After all, you’re curious about both of them, and they seem to be curious about each other.

Of course, something will have to interrupt this tea party eventually…


[] There’s a doll here that cough isn’t like the rest cough.

[] Alice gets a message from home.
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Meanwhile, Hatate Himekaidou is perched on PI’s bed, exploring his browser history with a nefarious plot in mind. Alas, she finds naught.

“Dammit,” she mutters to herself, “I bet that bastard clears it every night now that the kid’s with him. Or maybe he doesn’t even need porn anymore?” She sighs, but an idea swiftly comes to her. “Wait, I bet he saves it all in some secret archive. He seems like the type.”

The dark-eyed crow tengu opens up the file explorer and begins digging through folders. It doesn’t take long for her to find a one with a padlock on it, and her eyes light up. “Password protected? This has got to be it.”

She toys around with some guesses, but all her attempts fail. “Come on, think,” she urges herself. “He said that he changes his passwords all the time, so what’s something recent that he would make into a password?”

After a few moments of thought, she types in “notapedophile” and the folder opens. She laughs. “Of course! I’m a fucking psychic, after all. This kind of security is no match for me!”

In reality, it was a lucky guess, and PI doesn’t care that much about his passwords. That’s about to come back to bite him, though.

“It’s just a bunch of documents,” Hatate grumbles, “and none of them are smut. I could’ve sworn he’d have some lewd manifesto in here.”

However, Hatate’s eyes fall upon one particular document — with her own name on it. She doesn’t hesitate to open it. “Now what do we have here?”

After reading through it, she smiles. “Oh, I see what he’s done. These are all dossiers on the people he’s met, and what’s been going on.” After closing out of her own, she starts opening up other files at random. “Doesn’t look like they go back very far, though.”

As Hatate scrolls through all the files in the directory, she sighs and pops her neck. “I was going to masturbate in his bed to pay him back for all the shit he’s said, but I guess I can look through these files instead.” Then she grins. “I’ll masturbate after.”


PI’s files have been unlocked!

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Fuck, almost forgot something.

Thread 1: >>63343
Thread 2: >>64075

Awesome: >>64680
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Damn. All of these are tempting vote options.


I think this would be the most entertaining, though. And I'd want to see if there's any sort of love triangle possible. Will look at the files tomorrow, should be interesting.

(Minor quibble, but I would have expected Alice to have learned some etiquette from mother dearest, assuming no major twists in her background. You might have a different idea of her upbringing, granted.)
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Kinda want to close the side quests before starting new ones.

Also, I slightly hyped myself up on the corrupted file on the drive. I thought it was an encryption of some kind and was ready to start throwing programs at it when I just saw it was just a highlight.

Still nice nonetheless.
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[X] There’s a doll here that cough isn’t like the rest cough.

Man this story is nice.
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[x] Marisa incoming!

We still have to lead her to Mima AND lead Mima to Rinnosuke so...

Also, it's pretty bad for us that someone with no respect for privacy and a hypocritical desire to expose all secrets but her own just read up all about Mori.

I hope we won't end having her shot.
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[x] There’s a doll here that cough isn’t like the rest cough.
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[X] There’s a doll here that cough isn’t like the rest cough.

One of these things is not like the others.
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>just a highlight
What do you mean by this? I don't want to spend hours going through the ciphers that I know if it's a waste of time.

Also [X] There’s a doll here that cough isn’t like the rest cough.

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It might be hard to pick all of them out, but every capital letter should spell out the answer. Not very creative, I know, but I wanted something fairly accessible that would fit.

Please don't waste time throwing ciphers and decryption at it.
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Well I wasn't expecting this to get meta.
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Witch party crasher detected.

Also, I bet Hatate uses anal stimulation when getting off, the dirty little crow.
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I meant that all you had to do was click and drag and highlight the document all the way down.

Although what the author just said afterwards just now leads me to believe there is more to the document than the hidden text.
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I finally decided on picking this. It'll be interesting seeing Alice react so much more animatedly with a fellow magician considering her chilliness toward PI & Suwako.
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I'm fucking retarded. I spent three hours going through all the WWI & WWII era ciphers I know, and some older ones, before I highlighted the rest of the damn page
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I'm going to go ahead and call it for adding another magic-user into the mix.

You're tempting me, anon. I still need to write that Keine lewd.

I deeply apologize. I might change that file up a bit to prevent such misunderstandings in the future.
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Hey, if you're tempted don't hold back. I'm just saying that a girl with an ass like Hatate's can probably appreciate some (not so) tender care back there.
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I hope Pi, Suwako and Hina will kick out Hatate from the apartman soon. Because she did a mess already while they are in Alice's house.
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You clear your throat, and hopefully the air, before speaking. “If I may broach the subject, Miss Margatroid, you mentioned that you brought Hina here because you were interested in her dolls. What do you hope to gain by studying Hina’s technique?”

Instead of reacting coldly, Alice tilts the question around in her head for a moment. She glances at Hina, who is staring straight at her, and then clears her own throat. “I overheard you speaking with that child about those dolls carrying misfortune. Of course, I had determined something like that to be the case before, but hearing it confirmed only strengthened my resolve to speak with Hina.”

Alice reaches out and beckons one of her dolls, which touches down on her palm like a bird. As she strokes its head, she continues talking. “I love my children, but I only call them that for my own benefit. As you might have noticed, everything they do is by my hands. I even speak for them.”

“And that is exceedingly impressive,” Hina mentions.

“It is,” Alice replies shamelessly, “but it also isn’t enough. I’ve been researching for a way for my children to act on their own — to cut the strings and let them think their own thoughts, voice their own feelings.”

You’ve never heard of a puppeteer who wants her creations to be out of her control. “To have life, then?”

Alice stares at you, then the doll on her hand, and smiles. “Yes, I think that is correct. My most sincere wish is to give my creations life.”

Hearing her is like listening to a little girl’s wish on a shooting star — except this is an adult magician. For all you know, she could be capable of pulling it off. Regardless, neither Hina nor Mori seem very happy about Alice’s declaration. Hina looks concerned, while you notice Mori gripping her cup tightly as she ducks down and blows on it.

Alice’s eyes probe Hina in particular, until the latter finally musters a suggestion. “Why not have children through natural birth, Alice? It would fulfill all your wishes in the same manner.”

“Hina, not every woman can have children,” you inform her darkly. Barren women can be desperate and just a little detached from reality, as you know too well from a past affair.

“I can have children,” Alice says, quickly dashing your assumption with a tinge of red in her face. “I would just rather not bother with a m—a mate. I want my children crafted from my own hands, not the smelly orbs of some brute.”

You let out a sigh of relief. “So you're not insane, just a lesbian.”

Mori’s tension breaks with a snort, as she tries desperately to hold back laughter.

Alice flushes even more red, and the doll on her hand floats away — a little stiffly. The puppeteer clears her throat again in an attempt to maintain her composure. “I—I really don’t know about that. Even as a man, you would admit the female form is more attractive, wouldn’t you?” Her eyes move to Mori. “Even if your tastes may be a bit more… petite than my own.”

She has you there — the first part, anyway. “My ‘tastes’ are totally normal,” you assure yourself, avoiding Mori’s glance. “More to the point, have you considered adoption, Miss Margatroid?”

Unlike the idea of reproductive sex and its aftermath, she isn’t immediately repulsed by the suggestion. “I must admit to some sympathy for the abandoned and otherwise orphaned children of Gensokyo,” she says, “but surely you’ve seen the lot that run around the slums. They’re far too rowdy and dirty. The fairies have been an especially negative influence on them, and I couldn’t imagine what manner of nonsense would occur if I took one into my company.” Her eyes shift to Mori, and she clarifies, “No offense to present company, of course.”

“Um, none taken,” Mori replies, looking less than pleased regardless.

“This would all be assuming,” Alice continues, “that I lived in a place suitable for a child in the first place. Even with the proper treatment, the toxins of the forest would have a severely negative impact on their health.”

Mentioning the forest should have been enough; she really didn’t need to go into that little rant. You thought you didn’t like kids. “Uh, at least you’ve thought it through.”

She shakes her head. “It’s not that I ever had to think it through. I always knew I wanted to create life with my work.”

“But why go so far?” Mori speaks up. “Why play god?”

Alice falls silent as Mori and Hina’s eyes bare into her. It’s not like you aren’t curious, but there’s something very targeted in the way they’re pursuing this conversation — or interrogation. After a few moments, Alice finally answers, “There’s someone I respect very much. I would like to stand beside her with my own children. That is all.”

“That’s all?” Mori repeats back to her, unconvinced.

“That is all,” Alice affirms.

“I think this discussion is meaningless,” Hina intervenes grimly. “I do not consider my dolls to be my children, or even my creations. They are merely extensions of myself. Your creations would not be able to fill your heart, just as their own hearts would not exist. No matter what your reasons, you would be inflicting a grave cruelty onto them by giving them life.”

Alice trembles under the reproach of her peer, but doubles down. “What are you talking about? My children would be perfect! I would shower them with love and adoration! What could possibly be cruel about that?”

“I know for a fact that they would linger between life and oblivion, wishing for either,” Hina declares, her face rigid as stone. “One of which they could never truly have, and the other they would never allow themselves to have.”

Alice’s dolls hover around her, all staring blankly at Hina while their master’s voice escalates. “Th—that’s not how it is! Lady Yumeko, Yuki and Mai, Miss Louise, they all—”

“I know exactly how it is,” Hina cuts in with a heavy finality.

The two women continue to stare at each other, unblinking, while you and Mori watch. The tea’s barely cooled, and the party’s already ground to a halt. Out of curiosity, you raise your cup and take a sip. The bitterness slides down your tongue and throat, leaving a trail of numbness that your saliva has no effect on. Not that you mind too much — Lucky’s sake has a similar effect — but you’ve never experienced it in such a condensed form. It takes some fortitude not to gag, but you are still trying to maintain the bare minimum of politeness, especially after that conversation.

Then the door pops open, and in strides someone who couldn’t give less of a shit about any kind of politeness. “Hey hey, Alice, how about we go find some—”

Marisa freezes and takes in the scene. The sudden commotion breaks Alice and Hina’s eye-lock with each other, while Mori cringes and you relax. If that dirty witch costume wasn’t so instantly recognizable, you might have pulled your gun on her for barging in like that.

“A tea party?” Marisa continues. “Well, never mind then. Magic can wait. I’ll just grab myself a cup.” Without any feedback from Alice — who seems entirely occupied with cooling herself off at the moment — the bold witch marches to the kitchen and stands on the tips of her toes to reach the cabinet with the cups. Almost begrudgingly, a doll floats over and grabs a cup for her. Marisa grins as she tells the doll, “Thanks. I see the Shanghai Squadron is still in top form.”

The doll emotionlessly drifts back toward Alice, while Marisa sits in the last, empty chair between you and Alice at the table. “Awesome,” she remarks, as she pours a cup for herself and then sits down. “It’s been a long time since I’ve had your tea.”

Marisa doesn’t seem to have any problems absorbing the silent attention from everyone at the table — including the dolls. Judging from her remarks, the only reason you’re seeing her in this coherent a state is because she’s lacking mushrooms. Her untended hair is barely contained by her giant witch’s hat, her eyes are weary and wrinkled, and the mix of sweat and earth overpowers even the smell of this ridiculously strong tea.

She turns to you. “Didn’t expect to see you here, PI.” Then she looks past you, with a big grin. “And mini-me, too!”

Mori laughs nervously. “Whatever you say. You aren’t going to grab me again, are you?”

Marisa shrugs. “Maybe later. So, what are you two doing around these parts?”

‘What does it look like?” you answer dryly. “We’re here for the tea party.”

“I guess I coulda figured that,” Marisa responds, “but what I meant was: how do you guys know Alice?”

“I met her the day I carried you back to Kourindou,” you inform her. “I don’t think you were in the state of mind to remember it.”

She laughs without shame. “Yeah, probably not.” Her eyes fall on Hina. “And who is this? A friend of yours, PI?”

Hina has watched Marisa curiously, and her eyes light up when Marisa looks at her. “My name is Hina Kagiyama,” she says. “Pleased to make your acquaintance.”

Hina stands up to bow, but Marisa doesn’t hesitate to speak against it. “Don’t be so formal for my sake. I’m just an ordinary kind of girl, y’know? Treat me like family.”

“Because that’s how she’ll treat you,” Alice finishes, having steadied herself. “Marisa. I don’t recall inviting you to my tea party, though I appreciate you not breaking anything this time.”

“What, you think I have to crash in here to make myself welcome?” Marisa laughs under Alice’s cold gaze. “I’m like a mainstay, right? I can just pop in and there’s always a spot for me. Besides, the more the merrier.” She takes a sip of the tea, and then exhales with satisfaction. “Good like always. So, nobody has a tea party just sitting in silence, right? What were you guys talking about before I showed up?”

Alice’s eyes flash coolly from Hina back to Marisa. “Nothing worth discussing any further, apparently. Please, Marisa, take the initiative — like you always do.”

Marisa looks at Alice, then slowly at everyone else, like she might finally be realizing that she forced her way into an awkward situation. But, all she does is smile. “I dunno. I was kinda hopin’ you’d have some news.”

Alice sighs and takes a sip of tea like it’s her only solace in this world, which is probably right.

If Marisa is sober, and there’s nothing else to talk about, then this is probably the best time for you to bring a certain ghost up. “I actually do have some news that might appeal to you, Marisa,” you begin.

“Ooooh,” she replies with gleeful curiosity. “If it’s you, then it can’t be anything good. What, is my old man looking for me again or something?”

It’s not very surprising that Marisa might have problems with her father, considering her lifestyle. You mentally file that away as information that might be useful later and continue. “No, not quite. But, I have become acquainted with someone who is looking for you. Would you have any business with a ghost?”

“A ghost?” Marisa repeats back to you, bewildered. “No, I can’t think of anyone I know who’s kicked the bucket recentl—”

Then she comes to a realization that jolts her out of her chair. “H—hey now. You aren’t talkin’ about Lady Mima, are ya?”

You never thought you’d hear Marisa address someone with that kind of respect. “Yeah, it’s Mima,” you tell her. “She’s been looking for you for a while, it seems. For the moment, she seems to be traveling with—”

“After all this time, she’s still lookin’ for me?” Marisa mutters in a panic. “I thought she would be done with me forever after last time. What could I do for her? I haven’t been studying or training. Ain’t done much of anything, really.”

You’ve never seen Marisa so bothered in the time that you’ve known her, and judging from Alice’s reaction, she hasn’t either. “Marisa?” the taller blonde says. “What are you doing?”

However, her concern is lost on Marisa, who continues to ramble to herself. “She’ll be very upset with me for not unsealing her myself.” A smile breaks out on her face. “But isn’t this a good thing? Lady Mima is free! Even if I have to prostrate a million times, I can learn from her again! We can finish our goal of exterminating the humans of Gensokyo, starting with that Hakurei bitch that sealed her up in the first place! Yeah, if I take care of her, she’ll definitely forgive me.”

“Excuse me,” you interject, “what?”

Marisa snaps out of it, and then grins sheepishly. “Ah, sorry about that. It’s the uh, drugs. Y’know. Don’t worry about it.” She stands up and beelines for the door, talking quick. “Well, that was some great tea, Alice. Good seein’ you again, PI and kiddo. And nice meetin’ ya, weird smiley lady. So long!”

Then she’s out the door and gone, practically leaving behind a dust trail.

Alice sighs wistfully. “In like a storm and out like a storm. I would have actually gone hunting for mushrooms with her, had she stayed.” Then she glares at you. “This… Mima woman. Is she dangerous?”

You’re still in a bit of shock, because you know what you heard. “She said she wants to exterminate the humans in Gensokyo,” you tell Alice. “That sounds a little dangerous, Alice.”

The puppeteer only blinks, unfazed. “And? I’m more concerned about what kind of relationship they have.” Then she adds, “Also, please address me as—”

You turn to Mori. “Shouldn’t we do something about this — now?”

Mori seems more amused than worried, and shrugs. “You’re the guy with the gun. Personally, I’d prefer not to get involved until they make a move formally. It’s not really good optics for me to bust her up before she even does anything.”

“I mean, Marisa said that’s what she and Mima were going to do,” you argue. “Shouldn’t that be cause for at least a little concern?”

“What, are you willing to chase her through the forest?” Mori argues back. “Because I’m not. If Mima really wants to exterminate all humans, do you think she’ll have any more of a chance of doing so with Marisa’s help?”

“Not likely,” Alice answers.

“I cannot see it,” Hina says, reminding you she’s there.

You lean back, sigh, and admit defeat. “I guess you’re right.” Then you think back on what Marisa was mumbling about. “She mentioned something about the Hakurei. The only one we know of with any connection to them is Reimu. Should we be worried about her?”

“Marisa wouldn’t stab someone in the back,” Alice explains. “She’s far more likely to eat a mushroom and charge in like a hooligan. At the very least, this ‘Reimu’ you speak of will see her coming.”

You picture Marisa with rainbows in her eyes, flailing at Reimu like a madwoman and chanting about marching humans into mass graves. “Then we should be worried about Marisa then,” you decide. “Reimu will kill her.”

Alice pours herself another cup of tea. “Are you so sure, PI? Marisa may be at the level of an apprentice, but — as loathe am I to admit it — she is still a practitioner of magic. What gives you so much confidence in this girl?”

It isn’t lost on you that Alice has picked up on your name. You watch her as she calmly sips her tea, and decide there’s something you’d like to try out. “Actually,” you remark, “please address me as Mister Tsurugi.”

Alice takes a breath, then another sip of tea, before replying, “Yes, of course. Mister Tsurugi.”

That was satisfying. You continue. “Reimu is pretty strong. She’s human, but beats up youkai fairly often. Since she’s usually around Mima, that means that if Marisa finds Mima, she’ll find Reimu too. I don’t know why Mima lingers around someone who’s supposed to be her enemy, though.”

“Might be some kind of misunderstanding on Marisa’s part,” Mori says, “or things could have changed since they last met.”

“Maybe,” you respond. “It would be nice to clear things up, but it’s tough to know where Reimu and Mima will be at any given time. I don’t even know where that shrine of theirs is.”

Mori turns to the fortuneteller. “Hina, what’s the likelihood that we’ll get wrapped up in it no matter what we do?”

Hina wastes no time answering. “It is certain that you will be caught in the middle, eventually.”

“Fantastic,” you remark dryly. “In that case, we might as well just go on with our lives. No use in seeking out trouble when it’s going to find us sooner or later. We can help Marisa then, if there’s anything left of her.”

Mori nods. “Sounds like a plan to me.”

“I don’t know the half of what you all are talking about,” Alice speaks up, “but I’ll wish you good luck. Marisa should count herself lucky she has Mister Morichika and yourself looking after her.”

You stare at the nonchalant puppeteer. “Excuse me? I don’t recall signing up to be her babysitter. Aren’t you her friend? Shouldn’t you be more worried than us if something’s going to happen to her?”

Alice thinks about it, then shakes her head. “Marisa is like a stray cat. You take care of it while it’s around, maybe invite it in occasionally, and possibly feel a little… envious when you see someone else getting along with it — but when it ends up dead in the road after being hit by a cart, there’s no surprise.”

You’re starting to see what Mori was thinking when she mentioned something about Alice selling her soul. “Right. Youkai logic. How could I forget?”


With little else to discuss, the tea party came to an end. Alice drank most of the tea and Mori put a large dent in the snacks. While the dolls cleaned up, Alice whisked the three of you out the door, to the relief of just about everyone involved.

“That was certainly something,” you remark after leaving the house behind. “We can get out of this forest ourselves, can’t we?”

“The path is pretty clear, and most of the scrubs lurking around here during the day aren’t a threat to Hina and me,” Mori boasts.

Satisfied, you turn to Hina and figure you should attempt some level of consolement. “I’m sorry things didn’t really work out for you and Alice. She’s definitely a weird one.”

Hina smiles, unperturbed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. During the tea party, I decided that Alice and I will become great friends.” Then her expression fades into something more determined. “She must see the error of her ways.”

Oh no. Of all the times for Hina to become indignant, it has to be when dealing with a cold-hearted youkai magician. “You mean bringing her dolls to life?” you say. “I think she was pretty adamant about it, and I don’t really get why you’re so against it in the first place.”

Hina frowns. “I am against it because it is impossible. Alice may not have much misfortune, but her hands could weave it all the same. I do not understand it myself, but for the first time I feel like I should prevent such a calamity.” Her fists clench. “I am the only one who can.”

You look to Mori, who only has a shrug to offer.

[] That doesn’t sound like a good idea. Tell Hina that Alice should be left alone, or else things could turn ugly.

[] Support Hina. You may not comprehend everything that’s going on, but it’s good that she wants to take an active role in helping, instead of waiting for the misfortune to occur.

[] Try to convince Hina to see things from Alice’s perspective. It sounds like the puppeteer has her reasons for doing what she’s doing.
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[x] Support Hina. You may not comprehend everything that’s going on, but it’s good that she wants to take an active role in helping, instead of waiting for the misfortune to occur.

Isn't preventing misfortune the same as bringing fortune...?
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[x] Support Hina. You may not comprehend everything that’s going on, but it’s good that she wants to take an active role in helping, instead of waiting for the misfortune to occur.

Let's not question an expert on misfortune about her specialty.
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[x] Support Hina. You may not comprehend everything that’s going on, but it’s good that she wants to take an active role in helping, instead of waiting for the misfortune to occur.
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[x] Try to convince Hina to see things from Alice’s perspective. It sounds like the puppeteer has her reasons for doing what she’s doing.

Curse you, writefag, for bringing up the only character who can make me vote against Hina.
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[] Support Hina. You may not comprehend everything that’s going on, but it’s good that she wants to take an active role in helping, instead of waiting for the misfortune to occur.
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[x] Try to convince Hina to see things from Alice’s perspective. It sounds like the puppeteer has her reasons for doing what she’s doing.

I vote this. Maybe Alice can find another means to give them life instead of something from Hina's curse dolls.
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[X] Support Hina. You may not comprehend everything that’s going on, but it’s good that she wants to take an active role in helping, instead of waiting for the misfortune to occur.

Hina's experience and wisdom outweighs Alice's, so he should support her.
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dead or alive
[x] Support Hina. You may not comprehend everything that’s going on, but it’s good that she wants to take an active role in helping, instead of waiting for the misfortune to occur.

“I say go for it,” you tell her. “Honestly Hina, I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen you bothered.”

The word gives Hina some pause for consideration, and she stops in the middle of the trail. “Bothered?” she repeats curiously. “Is that what it is, PI?”

You and Mori both stop and face her. Leave it to Hina to ask for a confirmation of her own emotions. “Seems like that to me. You took what Alice said real personally.”

Hina continues thinking, and then nods. “I see. I believe you are correct. I am bothered. I wish for Alice to become my friend, but she is already on such a dark and fruitless path.”

“Don’t worry, Hina!” Mori says. “We can help you.” You’d like to interject with something besides blind optimism, but Mori keeps going. “After all, you’ve already helped PI so much. It’s the least he could do.” Then she turns to you with a big grin. “Isn’t it?”

Mori’s right, but damn her for being so smug about it. “Even I can admit that much,” you respond. “Hina, I would be glad to repay the favor.”

Hina bows lightly to you. “Then I humbly accept.” When she looks up, she’s smiling. “Thank you, PI.”

“But,” you continue, “there isn’t much I can do when I’m not sure what’s going on in the first place.” You aren’t in a hurry to see Hina become so deathly serious again, but it’s about time for you to address something that you’ve been dodging for a while now. “If I may ask, what are you, exactly? It seems that on some level, you sympathize with those creations Alice was talking about.”

Sure enough, Hina’s smile fades. “That question should be so simple, yet it is not.” She sighs in a manner that is more like opening her mouth and letting the air drift out on its own. “The best answer I have come up with is that I am an idol of misfortune.”

In no way is that an answer to you. “An idol? Like those performers on television?”

She tilts her head. “I am afraid I am unfamiliar. I do not watch television.”

You should have known better. “Nevermind, sorry.”

“What I refer to are sacred objects of worship,” she goes on. “The people — long ago, at least — believed me to be the harbinger of all misfortune. And so, I drew all of their anger, sorrow, and hope. Slowly, I gained power from it.”

Now this is starting to sound more familiar to you. “Does that mean that you’re a goddess too, Hina?”

She shakes her head. “Gods are living beings. I am not.”

You haven’t really had the chance to study Hina’s anatomy — unfortunately — but you do know some things. She’s a bit stiff, but she breathes. When she embraced you, she was warm — and soft. Sure, Hina may not blink often and you’ve never seen her eat anything, but that just puts her on the same level as a youkai. She’s still alive. “I don’t understand. You’re standing right here, talking to me. How can you say that you’re not a living being?”

“I was not born into this world naturally,” she answers. “I was only a doll, created by a human for the Nagashi-bina festival.”

Then Hina would know exactly what Alice is trying to do, because she’s the product of something like it. However, you still find it difficult to believe. “The Nagashi-bina festival is what you told me about the other day, right? Humans sending dolls down the river to get rid of their misfortunes? How did it… change you like that?” This identity crisis seems to be one of the only things Hina is sensitive about, so even you want to try and pick your words carefully.

Recalling the tale brings a frown to her face, and not the kind that comes from painful nostalgia. It’s something far more bitter and frustrated. “My creator was an artist. He sought to craft the perfect doll for the festival, but when it came time to send me downstream, he refused.” She looks down with shame. “I only existed to be sent down the river with his misfortunes, but he denied me my purpose. And so, I continued to amass misfortune while he paraded me about the village. Accidents — and later, outright calamities — came to the village, but my creator still would not send me down the river. The villagers began creating small imitations of me for the Nagashi-bina festival and sent them down the river, hoping that might alleviate their troubles, but it offered them little solace knowing I was still around.”

You wonder if this has anything to do with the fact that all of Hina’s dolls are modeled after herself, but it isn’t worth stopping her to ask.

“They tried exiling my creator,” Hina continues darkly, “but by that time he was elderly and stubborn. In the end, they burned down his home, and he still did not leave. Only I remained in the ashes. The villagers called me a symbol of misfortune, built a small shrine at the foot of the mountain for me, and began holding their Nagashi-bina festivals there. Then villagers started seeing me in order to plant curses on each other, or evade curses themselves. As the generations passed and the traditions continued, I became able to move and speak on my own. The villagers always avoided interacting with me directly, but I still watched over their festivals from afar.”

You remember the place Hina led you to when you were searching for Shizuha Aki. If it was built for Hina like she says it was, then that would explain why its size and lacking decoration for a shrine. “You’re talking about the shrine where we found Shizuha Aki, aren’t you? That was your shrine?”

Hina confirms with a nod. “Yes. Many of the gods here in Gensokyo visited me in that shrine — mostly out of curiosity. Shizuha Aki was one who visited me frequently. I had a hunch that was where she might seek shelter if she was evading her sister.”

A chill wind creeps through the trees around you, freeing leaves from their branches as if mentioning the autumn goddess was enough.

You find it difficult to comfort Hina. In the past, you’ve had to offer some level of counseling to humans and youkai — but this kind of metaphysics is beyond you. “I just find it difficult to believe that humans can do such a thing,” you remark eventually. “Those villagers had enough superstition to turn you into some kind of avatar of misfortune. Shouldn’t you hold them accountable for what happened to you, as well?”

She shakes her head. “I understand the villagers. Their actions were rooted in logic. However, I cannot understand my creator. Why not send me downstream when that is what I was created for? Why trouble himself and the villagers for the sake of a worthless doll?” Her green eyes peer straight into yours, solemnly pleading. “Do you think I am alive, PI? Do I have a soul? What will happen when I’m destroyed?”

The barrage of questions rattles your brain as you try to think of delicate answers, but then you realize that you shouldn’t be the one thinking this hard. “Will it really help if I answer all that for you, Hina?” you respond.

“I believe so,” she replies bluntly. “That is why I asked.”

“I could stand out here and theorize about it all day,” you tell her, “but nothing will come of it. The only way you’ll feel better is if you reach your own conclusions.”

Hina tilts her head back and forth a few times, before answering in a defeated tone. “Perhaps.”


Hina remained silent for the remainder of the walk back to your apartment, probably lost in thought. If you addressed her she would respond, and she was paying enough attention to know where you were going, but otherwise she had nothing to contribute in terms of conversation.

Of course, Mori knows how to fill the dead air in her own way. “In my opinion, it comes down to two choices,” she proclaims. “Either you really gussy up with a colorful suit, or invest in a dark trenchcoat and a hat.”

“Your opinion is stupid,” you tell her flatly. “Both of those will stick out like a kappa out of water around here. And how would I afford a trenchcoat, let alone a suit? In case you haven’t noticed, I have problems just feeding myself sometimes.”

“You would get more work if you dressed the part!” Mori argues.

“If I looked the part, then I wouldn’t be good at my job,” you argue back.

Mori thinks for a moment, and then snaps her fingers. “I got it! Maybe I] should dress up. I could be the adorable mascot character. There’s a pretty famous kid detective in the outside world, y’know. It’s proven!”

You know by now that the only way to win is to stop playing. “We’re here,” you announce dully in front of your apartment’s building. You look back to Hina, who is still distracted. “Hina, if you need a bit of time before we confront that bird, I would completely understand.”

The fortuneteller focuses at the sound of her name. “I am fine,” she assures you. “Please, continue.”

Getting this over with as soon as possible is also perfectly acceptable. You walk up to your door and start unlocking it. “If we’re lucky,” you say, “she’ll be passed out and we can just pick her up and drop her on the street somewhere.”

The final latch clicks and you push open the door, letting pale light flood into what would otherwise be your still and dark living room.

This isn’t how you thought it would be. You were expecting Hatate to be in her underwear on the couch, watching television and stuffing her face with whatever she could find in the kitchen. Or, she would be tearing apart the walls themselves trying to find your secrets. Instead, everything is exactly how you left it. Your apartment is completely quiet. Did she really pass out after you left? There’s no way you’re lucky enough for her to vacate herself.

Mori pops up behind you. “Uh, everything alright?”

“I don’t know,” you answer, before calling out. “Hatate? You here?”

“Still in the bedroom,” she calls back.

Of course. You lead Mori and Hina back into your room, where you discover not Hatate, but only your laptop sitting open at the foot of your bed. However, your bathroom door is shut and locked. You march around your bed to the door and beat your fist against it. “You better not be clogging up my toilet with your rancid, white bird shit! The plumbing barely functions as it is!”

Then you hear the bedroom door slam shut behind you, and you turn around to see Hatate standing behind the three of you, blocking the only sensible means of escape out of your bedroom. She must have been hiding on the other side of the open door when you walked by. “Okay!” she declares with a malicious grin. “Now that I’ve closed off your only avenue of escape, we can get down to business.” While you cock your eyebrow at her, she adds, “Oh, and for your information, my shit is the same color as yours.”

You roll your eyes. “That’s fantastic to know. Now, why are you doing whatever it is that you’re doing?”

“That’s a goooood question,” she responds, taking a few menacing steps closer to you, Mori, and Hina. “Why would I want to corner you?”

You look at Mori, who shrugs, and then at Hina, whose smile is just as blank as usual. Then, you turn back to Hatate. “You’ve lost your last marble?”

“No no no no,” she replies. “I didn’t lose anything. I found something. Why don’t you take a look at your laptop?”

You might as well indulge her, since it doesn’t seem like she’ll be cooperative otherwise. You walk up to your laptop, bend down, and look at the document she has—

This is Mori’s file.

Oh fuck. This is going to be annoying.

“Looks like you’ve been having some interesting adventures after all,” Hatate continues. “When were you planning on filling me in on all the pesky little details?” Then she turns to Mori, while still addressing you. “Or did you think that having a goddess from the outside world as a companion wasn’t such a big deal?”

Mori, who wouldn’t know anything about the files you keep, stares curiously at you. “Did she find your diary or something?”

“Something like that,” you mutter.

“Extensive files on most everyone you’ve met,” Hatate explains to Mori for you. “There’s one for me, one for you, and even one for Hina.”

Hina blinks a few times in surprise. “Even me? Do you say many nice things about me in your diary, PI?”

“It’s not a—” you start to clarify, but then give up. “Look, it’s just a record. A private record, in case I happen to forget anything that’s happened. Detectives do that.”

Of course, that isn’t the real reason you keep those files. They’re for preserving the events themselves. It might sound strange, but you’re a first-hand witness of just how ridiculous the powers in Gensokyo can get. Your files are an important backup in case someone like her were to ever go out of control — and not in your favor like last time.

“You know what detectives don’t do?” Hatate fires back. “They don’t hide the truth from their employers.” Then she turns to Hina. “And you, Hina. You knew all along, didn’t you? I’m disappointed.”

“Leave Hina out of this,” you tell Hatate, even though Hina herself seems pleasantly indifferent to the whole thing. “How many secrets have you tried keeping from me?

Hatate brushes off your rebuttal with an annoyed frown. “Those were totally different. I was lying to you in pursuit of the truth. You kept a foreign goddess from me in order to conceal the truth.” She frowns and glares. “You two are plotting something. You’re going to sweep this whole operation out from under me, aren’t you? Maybe that’s what you were planning all along, since I was getting too close.”

Each sentence sends a rush of heat into your skull. “Hatate, I like to think I’ve developed a tolerance to you, but even I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about any more. What does Mori being a goddess have to do with anything? Why do you think that means we’re in some nefarious scheme together? And finally, what could you possibly be getting close to? Oh, I know. You’re just being paranoid, surprise surprise!”

Mori rests her hand on your arm. “Calm down, PI. Getting into another fight with her won’t solve anything.”

You take a breath and try to smother your temper. Mori’s right, but you hate it.

Since you stopped, Hatate turns her attention to the little goddess. “So what’s your endgame? Were you planning on using me to strike at my superiors, so you could monopolize the faith of the humans and turn Gensokyo into a theocracy?”

“Nope,” Mori answers. “I tried something like that once, and it didn’t turn out very well. I don’t want to rule anything.”

Hatate laughs. “So you’re trying to tell me you don’t have any angle in coming to Gensokyo?”

Mori shrugs. “I didn’t have a choice coming here. All I really wanna do is help PI out and goof off for as long as I can.”

Hatate’s grin fades, and she stares at Mori harshly. “Bullshit. Every goddess has an angle. They mastermind even more than the tengu.”

“Sorry to disappoint you,” Mori replies, “but I’m just going with the flow. Becoming a full-time goddess again would be too much work.”

“So you’re going to be difficult,” Hatate stubbornly pushes on. “Okay then. There’s a couple things that PI has been keeping from you as well, if you want to reach some sort of agreement.”

You grimace. “Hatate, you—”

“I’m not interested,” Mori says, bringing you and Hatate to a dead halt.

The devious crow blinks, recoiling from the hard refusal. “What?”

“I don’t want to hear it from you,” Mori reiterates. “If he wants to tell me, then he’ll tell me. He has his secrets, and I’ve also neglected to tell him things. I’m still earning his trust, just like he’s earning mine.

Some of the heat in your head moves down to your cheeks. That sounds familiar — probably because you told Kotohime something very similar when she wanted to give you the dirt on Mori.

Hatate looks from you, to Mori, and back again. “There’s no way you two believe in each other that much, so quickly.”

“I think it is certainly possible,” Hina speaks up with a smile. “After all, was there not someone you believed in so much, long ago?”

A heavy shadow falls over Hatate’s face. “Yeah,” she mutters, “and it ruined me.” Then she lets out a long sigh. “Fine. I’m getting a headache. I’ll cede the victory to you two — for now.” She opens the bedroom door and stands in the boundary with her back turned to you. “I’m moving in next door. I already called in a favor to Q to help me move my stuff down from the mountain. I don’t want to share what little space there is here with some goddess, especially if I have to hear you two believing in each other so much.” She shivers with disgust at the very thought of it, though you have a feeling she’s just hamming it up now to cover her ass because she was wrong. Finally, she marches through your apartment and out the door, and you heave a sigh of relief.

That woman has some fucking issues, and being a tengu is probably the least of them.

Hina moves to follow after her. “There are still some blood stains I need to clean in that apartment, so I will also be taking my leave. I am glad everything has worked out.”

You wouldn’t say it’s worked out, since your employer has barged into your privacy once again and will likely continue to do so in the future.

“Please try to understand Hatate,” Hina continues. “She is odd, but she has many reasons for being the way she is.”

You were wondering if she was simply born so messed up in the head, or if her manic paranoia had been acquired over time — not that it’s an excuse for her either way. “I’ll try to keep that in mind,” you weakly assure Hina.

Before leaving, she bows to you and adds one last thing. “Thank you for accompanying me today. I will continue to think about what you told me, and how I might go about finding my answers.”

“Just don’t think too hard,” you tell her. “Go at your own pace, Hina.”

She turns around, flashes you another smile, and then goes out the door.

With Hina gone, it’s just you and Mori. You’re free to collapse onto your bed and heave a gigantic sigh. “I’m glad that’s over with.”

When Mori doesn’t immediately respond, you glance up to see her sneaking over to your laptop. With great haste, you rise up and slam it shut. “What was all that about believing in me and waiting until I was ready to tell you?”

“I wasn’t really going to look,” she says none too convincingly, “but I can’t help being curious about what you wrote. Did you take note of my measurements? Maybe some lewd thoughts or dreams?”

You frown at her. “No.”

She giggles and sits down next to you on the bed. “Sorry, just trying to loosen you up after all that. I think you were about to pop a blood vessel.”

“I’m surprised I didn’t,” you remark.

Suddenly Mori hops off the bed, stands in front of you, and then jumps into you. Her arms wrap around your back, and she murmurs into your chest. “I really meant what I said, y’know.”

You look down at her, and smile — since she probably can’t see it. “I know you did. And if it weren’t for what you said, I probably would have made things a lot worse between Hatate and me. What I mean is, uh, thank you. I appreciate you.”

She squeezes harder, which is kind of difficult to bear but you let it happen. After a few moments, she breaks the precious silence. “I was thinking maybe I’d earned a hug back.”

You relent easier than you’d think, and close your arms around her small shoulders. Her warmth spreads through you instantly. It would be ludicrous to think that inside this ridiculous child dwells a divine power as old as the earth itself, but you know it to be true.

“And maybe we could take a nap in your comfortable bed?” she continues.

Getting some rest does sound nice. Walking around all day and putting up with many different levels of nonsense is more than enough of a reason to shut your brain off for a couple hours — and this cozy moment certainly isn’t making you hostile to the idea, either. “Fine.”

“And maaaaybe I could cuddle with you some?”

You pull back and frown at the smug grin of hers. “You’re pushing it.”


Your eyes jump open at the sound of something bumping into the wall. You peel a still-snoozing Mori off of you, get up and stretch.

Another bump against the wall. That would be from Hatate’s new apartment, if you’re not mistaken. This doesn’t exactly bode well for the bird’s adjacent tenancy.

While you listen for any more noise, your nostrils pick up a raunchy smell. After a few sniffs, you isolate the area of origin to a patch in the center of your bed. Now, you don’t exactly go out and do laundry often — so your bedding never smells like roses — but this reeks.

“I noticed it too,” Mori comments suddenly, giving you a start. She must have woke up while you were ruminating. “Smells like sweat, lust, and a little bit of ass.”

You narrow your eyes at her. “You aren’t responsible for this, are you?”

“Nope!” she answers. “It’s just, you know, hormones and stuff are technically natural, so as an earth goddess I’m somewhat familiar with them.”

She lost you. “Hormones? What does that have to do with this?”

Mori stares at you — with a little more pity than you like to see. “Nevermind. I don’t think you want to know. Needless to say, I would recommend washing your sheets when you get a chance.”

That would be a good idea even without the smell, but the closest laundromat is the “abandoned” one a couple blocks down, and its owner has a bad habit of trying to scare the shit out of her clientele.

One more bump against the wall. “I hope that isn’t going to become a thing,” you mutter.

“Didn’t Hatate say she was getting kappa to help her move in?” Mori mentions. “That’s probably what it is.”

You’ve never met a kappa before, but you’ve heard they’re pretty small. They couldn’t be lifting furniture or anything, so what’s making all that noise?

Your thoughts are interrupted by a painful groan from your stomach. “Hungry,” you remark.

Mori stretches. “Yeah, we kinda skipped lunch. You sitting on any ideas for dinner?”

You could always make some fried rice or something, but you’re craving something a little more. “We could go out for some food,” you offer.

Mori's face lights up. “Are you asking me on a date?”

You immediately regret your suggestion. “Why would it be date? We go out all the time. It’s just that this time, we would be going for dinner.”

Of course, she’s having none of that. “Oh geez,” she murmurs to her stupid hat, “this is so sudden. What am I going to wear?”

“It wouldn’t be a date,” you tell her once more. “You could wear what you have on.”

She sighs and pouts. “Can’t you even pretend to indulge me?”

“No,” you answer quick, before glancing at the clock. It’s a little past five. You’d never find a proper restaurant in the slums, but this is actually the perfect time to catch a food stand before it gets dark and the bulk of the youkai come out.

You have a list of options. The only thing you’re lacking is the time in which to do them. You can always wash your sheets another time, ignore whatever’s going on in Hatate’s room, or cook here in the apartment. It’s just about choosing how to indulge yourself this evening.

[] Yeah, that smell is starting to worry you. If you’re going to the laundromat, you should go before dark.

[] You’re kind of curious about the kappa. If you check out Hatate’s new place, you might even find out more about Q.

[] Fine, you’ll take Mori on a “date” to whatever food stand you can find.

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>Your files are an important backup in case someone like her were to ever go out of control — and not in your favor like last time.

KieneI assume did what now?

[X] Fine, you’ll take Mori on a “date” to whatever food stand you can find.
Mori is more important than whatever sick masturbation fantasy Fats McCrow is getting up to.
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Argh, too many awesome-sounding options. What to choose, what to choose...

> its owner has a bad habit of trying to scare the shit out of her clientele

[x] Yeah, that smell is starting to worry you. If you’re going to the laundromat, you should go before dark.
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[x] Fine, you’ll take Mori on a “date” to whatever food stand you can find.

This isn't fair, I want all three.
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Wrong. She is another character.

Look it up again if you want. As they say, the truth shall set you free. Or her, in this case.

[X] Date
[X] Make a note to punch Hatate in the face for risking Gensokyo for the sake of her curiosity. If she asks, it was for messing with your stuff after you literally picked her up from the streets.

It's not like she'll feel it, right?
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[X] Fine, you’ll take Mori on a “date” to whatever food stand you can find.
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>sweat, lust, and a little bit of ass


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[x] Yeah, that smell is starting to worry you. If you’re going to the laundromat, you should go before dark.

I'd want to meet the proprietor, if >>64767 's (implied) guess is on the money.
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[] Fine, you’ll take Mori on a “date” to whatever food stand you can find.
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She is a goddess just she doesn't know it right? She is a living being. Why she thinks she isn't?
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She is goddess of misfortune. She was born from a nagashi bina queen doll. But she isn't doll anymore.
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[x] Fine, you’ll take Mori on a “date” to whatever food stand you can find.

Mori option is the only option.

I'd assume the one Hatate trusted is Aya. It would explain the magnitude of her hate. I wonder if she's even considered that Aya is lying to her to pursue the Truth?
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I think the reason why the creator kept her because he loved her.
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Who can blame him?
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File 150163845992.jpg - (631.56KB, 992x1403, undercover mori.jpg)
undercover mori
[x] Fine, you’ll take Mori on a “date” to whatever food stand you can find.


Ten minutes after she shoved you into the living room so she could get changed — despite your bitter protests — Mori erupts from your bedroom and skids to a halt in front of the couch. “What do you think?”

You turn off whatever garbage was on the television and give her your full attention, since you’d like to get this over with and eat.

It would be simple to say something halfhearted and then be on your way, but you can’t help but closely examine the outfit she’s put together. A brown mantle covers nearly her entire torso, under which are a white shirt, blue shorts, and navy leggings. On her head is a replacement for her hat that is only slightly less strange: a black beanie with what appears to be the eyes from her old hat glued on.

Mori adds a grin to her appearance. “Feel free to stare all you like. Your face tells me everything I wanted to know.”

Damn it. Just when you were thinking of saying something nice, she has to mouth off. “Do you think it’s going to be freezing?” you remark flatly. “I didn’t think there were any winter clothes in the stuff that Hina gave us.”

“I don’t mind being warm,” she responds, “and there was plenty of stuff in that pile. You’d be surprised.”

Beyond that, you can’t help but focus on the hat. “Did you just rip the eyes off your old hat and stick them on that one?”

She grins sheepishly. “Well, y’know. I can always put them back.”

Unbelievable. You had to fight her to put a strap on her old hat, but tearing the eyes off it is just fine, apparently. Not that you’re complaining too much — this new hat is definitely an improvement no matter which way you look at it.

“I was thinking that if we go out, I should be undercover,” she continues. “We have a tengu living next to us now, so that means this building is going to be on their radar, right? I should always be incognito.”

Given Hatate’s relationship with the other tengu, they would only fly by to heckle her or something. But, Mori definitely has a point. “That’s good thinking,” you tell her, “especially if more tengu are going to be snooping around here like we theorized.”

Mori grows a big, childish smile. “I know, right? That’s why you should treat me to something good as a reward! I was thinking, there’s gotta be seafood in Gensokyo, right?”

Your smile vanishes, as you foresee plenty of bartering this night.


The city is always more crowded than you like around this time, so you lead Mori around the outskirts. However, even from a distance you can feel the buzz of energy swirling about as the day shift arrives home and the night shift departs.

Mori takes it upon herself to start up some conversation. “I’ve picked up bits and pieces here and there, but what exactly do most of the people do for work?”

“Many are laborers,” you explain. “They work in the kappa factories, to be precise. For them, the relief of returning home is always short-lived when another day is just around the corner. Some devote themselves to their families, but others try to party with the youkai that come out at night and end up dead.”

She frowns. “Factories, huh? I saw some of those in the outside world. Sounds like a rough life.”

It’s a kind of life you can’t even imagine living, and have never really had to thanks to Hatate providing more-or-less consistent work and some very frugal living on your part. Of course, even if you wanted to, it’s not like there’s any place for you in normal society any more, whether it’s in Central or here in the slums.

“Working in a factory gets you a paycheck so you can buy food,” you tell Mori, “and it’s not like it costs a lot to live out here. It may be rough, but it’s stable — that is, until an errant piece of kappa machinery takes a limb off or you get jumped by a desperate youkai on the way to or from work.”

Mori whistles dimly. “Dang. You sure know how to set a fun mood.”

You shrug. “You’re the one who asked.”

She grins. “I’m just messin’ with ya. I appreciate the knowledge, really.”

You refrain from smiling back and return your attention to the streets. All this time you’ve been watching the sidewalks for anything good — or dangerous — and nothing has caught your eye. Then it comes into view: a tiny food stand that looks like it’s just about finished setting up. The sign reads “lamprey” — in simple characters that have been sloppily painted over something else, interestingly enough.

You turn to Mori. “Ever had lamprey eel before?”

She thinks. “It’s been a long time. How about you?”

“No,” you answer, “but it can’t be any worse than the ‘mystery meat’ they serve at some stands.” You try not to think about what you may have been served over the years here in the slums. “Anyway, lampreys are seafood, right?”

Mori smiles. “More or less! Sounds good to me.”

The two of you approach the stand. It looks like the owner is busy checking something underneath, so you sit down at the center stool while you wait for the owner to stand back up. Mori takes the one to your right. The stand itself reminds you of a traditional yakitori stand, and the hot grill in front of you offsets the crisp evening air.

Mori looks at you and smiles. “I’m kinda excited, y’know? It’s been a long time since I’ve eaten out with someone.”

“We went to the soup kitchen together a couple of times,” you mention.

“That was business,” she retorts. “This is pleasure.”

The owner pops back up and heaves a great sigh. Then she notices both of you and gasps. “Ah! Customers!” She immediately bows and almost smashes her face into the grill. “Welcome to my—err, the food stand of—um, Mystia Lorelei’s lamprey stand!”

Your heart skips a beat, and not just because she’s cute. Her pink hair, long ears, and small, pink wings are very familiar to you. Even though she’s wearing a homely kimono now, you still remember the sight of a rugged brown dress torn open — and her rent flesh and guts splayed out on the forest floor.

She’s the bird Mori was devouring the night you first met her.

You glance at Mori out of the corner of your eye, and notice that her smile is a little less gentle than it was a moment ago. As far as she knows, you still have no clue what really happened that night. She might think seeing this youkai will jog your memory — even though it was already done when she drew upon that Mishaguji monster again during the fight with the bug youkai.

“Good evening,” Mori replies steadily. “Do you have any specials today?”

The owner, Mystia, looks at Mori like she asked her to do calculus. “Well, I—I don’t know about any specials,” she replies. “All I have is grilled lamprey… but it’s good!”

Mori continues to stare at the birdgirl, who becomes increasingly confused. Finally, Mystia breaches the subject. “Um, do I know you from somewhere?”

“Nope,” Mori replies instantly. It doesn’t seem like Mystia remembers her, but that still isn’t enough for the goddess to relax.

You force something that isn’t a frown and chime in, hoping to get this over with soon. “How much?”

“How much?” Mystia repeats, with the same puzzled look. “Oh, um, for the lamprey? How about… 200 yen each?”

That’s pretty cheap, and you get the feeling that it’s because she doesn’t really understand the value of money. It sounds like she just came up with that price off the top of her head. However, it’s her loss and your gain. Maybe you’ll tip her if it actually turns out to be good.

“One lamprey for me,” Mori orders suddenly.

“And also for me,” you add.

Mystia looks at both of you and thinks. “Alright, so, uh, two lamprey, right? Coming right up!”

She reaches down, pulls lamprey out of a bucket, and throws them on the grill. “Ah! Don’t worry, I know the slime is poisonous to humans, so I cleaned them off beforehand! I made sure I wouldn’t forget that much, at least!”

The food may not kill you, but hearing her say it like that doesn’t exactly instill any confidence of her cooking skills. “I didn’t even know about that,” you remark, “but uh, thanks for remembering.”

Mystia continues smiling as she ducks down once again. “Alright, now what can I put on these to make them taste good…?”

While Mystia works, Mori turns to you to chat — though she never takes both eyes off of the sparrow. “So, PI. How many youkai own food carts around here?”

She didn’t bother using your fake name, but it doesn’t really matter for a youkai like Mystia. If she doesn’t remember who chewed on her a couple weeks ago, she probably won’t remember a customer whose name is just two letters. “There’s quite a few who are like Mystia here,” you answer. “Even youkai want money to buy stuff, so they’ll offer goods and services to humans brave enough to wander outside at night.”

“Services, huh?” Mori thinks in that devious sort of way that puts you on edge. “Any youkai prostitutes?”

That’s remarkably tasteless considering you’re in front of a youkai right now, but Mystia doesn’t seem to be paying attention to your conversation. “Yes, there are,” you answer. You would leave it at that, but you know that once her curiosity’s been sparked, you’ll have to satisfy it at some point. “Some of them will just mug you when they’ve got you alone, but other than that they genuinely have uh, something special to offer. Not that I would know from experience.”

Mori’s frowns at you warily. “Uh huh.”

A melodious humming draws your attention back toward Mystia, who is happily sprinkling something on the grilling lamprey. You waste no time in changing the subject. “Miss Lorelei, what is it that you’re putting on the lamprey?”

“Spices, I think,” is her cheery response.

She resumes humming. Again, she has failed to assure you of her culinary expertise. It could be rat poison, for all she knows.

Mori must notice your concern, because she smiles and says, “Don’t worry, I’ll try it first. I have an iron stomach.”

You’re certain she means that literally. “Thanks,” you respond. Then you take a whiff. “It doesn’t smell too bad, though.”

Mori watches Mystia some more before breaching another topic of discussion. “So, Mystia. You would never hunt any humans around here, right?”

Another racially sensitive topic. “Not so much anymore,” she answers, without losing her smile. “For some reason, a week or so ago I just lost my taste for humans. I don’t really remember what it was.” She pauses and thinks. “Come to think of it, it was about the same time that I moved out of the youkai forest. I just started getting really scared all of a sudden.” She laughs in a not-so-healthy kind of way. “Ain’t that funny? A youkai being scared of its own home?”

You can guess what spooked Mystia, and she’s sitting right next to you. “Don’t think about it too hard,” Mori tells Mystia. “I was just wondering how you ended up with a food stand.”

Mystia thinks back, noticeably taking her eye off the swiftly-cooking food in front of her. You end up watching the food as she recounts her story. “You know, a couple nights ago I was flying around the city late at night,” she begins. “I saw this yakitori stand and I got so mad. How dare they cook birds? So, when the old man who owned it closed shop one night, I knocked him down and ran off with it. I thought a lamprey stand would be much more bird-friendly.”

Mori frowns at her. “So assault and theft, is what you’re saying?”

“He was barbecuing my kind!” she argues, her temper flaring with the smoky heat of the range. “Aren’t the lives of those birds worth more than some old man’s stupid grill?”

As a debate between the bird and the goddess begins, you stay focused on the food.

“I can’t tell which you’re planning to cheat on me with: the goddess or the lamprey.”

You recognize that voice, which is why you don’t bother acknowledging it.

Kotohime sighs. “Playing hard to get, huh? Don’t you remember all those years ago, when we made that beautiful promise?”

That’s funny. Your promise died shortly before she did.

“You really cannot let go, can you?”

That’s rich, coming from a ghost who’s been haunting you for more than a decade.

“Do you still think that? Okay then. Forget about me. What are you doing with her?”

You glance at Mori, who’s arguing some point that you’ve lost track of. Then you turn to the stool on your left, where the redhead princess is perched with her long, violet kimono. What does it matter to this monster what you do with Mori?

She giggles. “Who’s the monster, here? Have you forgotten what manner of creature you’re dealing with? She’s a goddess with a demon inside of her. Face it, you have a history of being attracted to monsters. That goddess aside, let’s not forget the werewolf you played around with for a while, and of course we have to mention that annoying childhood friend of yours.”

Let’s not mention her. In fact, let’s not discuss any of this because it’s nonsense. They had their issues, but they weren’t murderers.

She smirks at you. “Kagerou was killing pets, you know from firsthand experience that cow isn’t stable, and one of the goddess’s victims is right in front of you. How many youkai do you think that little girl has vanquished like nothing? If the roles were flipped during the fight against the firefly, would she be sorry about erasing it from existence? Would it even register in her mind?”

The mad princess has zero room to talk about that. Listening to her hypocritically ramble is almost as bad as listening to Hatate. You miss the times long ago, when she would imagine stealing bunnies from the bamboo forest to keep as pets, or how she would become the greatest mother ever, or how—

“I should join the police and become your partner?” she finishes your thought for you. “That’s why I have to warn you: there’s such a thing as ‘blind faith.’ It was a lack of will, not a lack of insight, that ruined Takeo Yamaguchi’s life.”

Just fuck off, already.

“Are you alright, PI?”

You glance up. Both Mori and Mystia are staring at you. When you look back at Kotohime, there’s no trace of her. “Food’s done,” you announce to cover your behavior.

Mystia looks down at the shriveling, browning lamprey, and then panics. “It’s done! Um, okay, now I gotta get it off the grill and cut it up.”

While Mystia finishes preparing the food, Mori continues to stare at you until she finally says something. “Are you okay? You were zoned out pretty hard there.”

“I’m fine,” you assure her. “Just starving.”

Mori stares at you a little more, and then breaks out into a giggle. “Well, I guess that’s to be expected. We haven’t been eating much recently, and even the great detective must get hunger pains some time.”

You groan. “Great detective, huh? I’m strictly average. I just don’t have much competition.”

Mori snorts. “Cheeky bastard.”

Like she’s one to talk. Mystia sets a plate of lamprey in front of you, another in front of Mori, and then a pair of chopsticks each.

“We should probably pay before we eat,” you inform her.

The rookie shop owner blinks. “Pay?” Then it hits her. “Oh! Pay! Yeah, do that, please.”

You’re going to assume the total is 400 yen, so you hand her some coins that equal up to that. She doesn’t even count them before closing her palms and smiling bright at you and Mori. “Thank you very much! Enjoy your meal!”

You aren’t sure what Mystia’s goal in running a food stand is when she doesn’t seem to care about the money very much. Then again, youkai have a habit of just trying things sometimes since they lack the societal responsibilities of humans — or gods.

“Huh. Not bad!” Mori comments with a mouth full of chewed lamprey, having dove right in. “I can’t really explain what the taste is, but it all adds up to something good.”

That’s a suspicious recommendation if you’ve ever heard one. However, the smell is driving you mad, and you have to eat. You snatch up a grilled chunk of lamprey with your chopsticks, stick it in your mouth, and chew.

Then you chew some more.

Having never eaten lamprey, you’re surprised by how meaty the eel is. It’s firm, but not chewy, and the flavor is some kind of mix between curry and peanuts — with the typical oily, fishy flavor you’d expect. Like Mori said, it all comes together. It was probably an accident, but you have to hand it to Mystia: it’s good. It doesn’t look too good compared to yakitori, but you’ll take what you can get for 200 yen.

In no time, the meat is gone, as are the pains in your stomach. Mori finishes hers up pretty quick too, and lets out a big sigh that can only come from a heavy gut. “Dang,” she remarks. “I didn’t think one fish would do it, but I’m pretty content with myself. How are you feeling, PI?”

“The same,” you answer, before turning to Mystia. “You did good work.”

Mystia, who has spent her time staring at one or both of you while you eat, shines. “Thanks! Y’know, I wasn’t too sure how it would turn out, but I’ve always had a knack for making things edible.”

You glance around. The whole time you’ve been sitting here, nobody else has even walked close to the stand. “Seems like you picked a spot that’s awfully out of the way though,” you continue. If you hadn’t been actively trying to avoid the crowd, you would have never noticed her stand.

Mystia smiles confidently. “That’s because of my business sense,” she boasts. “I thought that all those other places already had a bunch of food stands, so I should go to a place that doesn’t have any! That way, I could soak in all the customers!”

“If no customers are walking by,” Mori replies flatly, “then there won’t be anyone to ‘soak in.’”

Mystia reacts with shock to this line of thinking. “Eh? You think so?” She thinks. “Maybe I could move it closer to all the people, I guess.”

“It’s also pretty early in the night,” you add optimistically. “We could be your first two customers out of a hundred. You never know.”

With that, you and Mori finish up and bid the ditzy bird farewell. Since it was good, you give her an extra 500 yen — though she seems infinitely perplexed by the gesture. You have no desire to really explain the whole concept behind “tipping,” so you leave quickly to return to your rented hovel.

Mori walks in front of you with her arms crossed — you think, since they’re pretty much covered by the mantle. Her cold shoulders alert you that you have made some kind of mistake — in her eyes. “You didn’t have to tip that youkai, y’know.”

“She surprised me,” you respond. “And you were right: she probably isn’t going to have any more customers if she stays there. Might as well make her night somewhat worthwhile.”

“You gave that youkai a second thought, when you’ve hardly even talked to me,” she complains. “I wanted something a little more from our ‘date.’”

“I’m not really sure what you were expecting out of me.”

“Not spending our limited funds on a garden-variety youkai that probably won’t remember your face tomorrow.”

Mori keeps walking, leaving you paused. She isn’t wrong, but does she really feel no compassion for that youkai whatsoever? Especially after what she did to her?

You move again. Surely there’s youkai that feel — or don’t feel, rather — the same way about eating humans. Yet, they also have to care for humans because humans are their livelihood. Youkai don’t kill indiscriminately unless they’ve really lost it. They do what they can to preserve their image, and that usually means preying on the outliers of human society every once in a while, whether it be figuratively or literally.

Yet you can’t help but be irked by Mori’s disregard for youkai. Shizuha fought youkai in a desperate attempt for faith, but Mori was outright devouring one. Is that what happens when a god goes insane? Humans die and are reincarnated, but what about youkai? They keep living. They keep being devoured over and over again until nobody even remembers what they’re supposed to be. You’ve seen it happen. Do gods just keep eating until they can get some semblance of identity left? Is that what would have happened if you hadn't intervened that night?

Is that what you were trying to do back then, Kotohime?


Mori’s hard tone snaps you out of it. You didn’t even realize you were in front of your apartment, and Mori is blocking the door indignantly. “You zoned out again, didn’t you? I’m not letting you in until you tell me what you were thinking about!”

Inviting her into your thoughts would only make things worse. You can’t help but think that monstrous form might come out again. Maybe she is the monster. The dripping chunks, the sad wail, the sounds of fangs chewing and slimy with blood — you can remember it so clearly now. That’s why you’re afraid.

Damn Kotohime. This is what she wanted you to think. Her trip to hell couldn’t come soon enough.

Mori takes a step towards you, her deep eyes piercing into yours. “Is your head giving you trouble? You’ve had a rough week, after all. Maybe some things are… mixed up, still.”

She’s suspicious, and rightfully so. There has to be some way to defuse this situation. Maybe you could take advantage of the fact that it's supposed to be the end of your “date.”

[] Assuring forehead kiss.

[] Distracting mouth kiss.

[] Caress her hands with your own.

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[x] Just spill it.

Let's not go lolicon route just yet.
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[] Caress her hands with your own.
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I agree, but I think that forcing it with a write-in leans too much toward "blind faith". I think we need to pick the option that Suwako will see as a distraction and cause her to press for more info. Unfortunately, I have no idea what that is yet.
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It's us believing in her, it works without making her do any stupid reacharound to prod us for info in a specific way. Besides, we don't have to spill anything about Kotohime, so it's all good.
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[X] Assuring forehead kiss.
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I sure hope you meant to spill your concern with her attitude, right? Because letting her know of kotohime is akin to reviving her. That's why she sticks with him: he's the only one who remembers her.

I'm guessing OP played Eternal Punishment.

[X] Assuring forehead kiss
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[X] Assuring forehead kiss
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>Because letting her know of kotohime is akin to reviving her.

Well then we're already completely screwed because Patchy and Koa both know about her from their trip inside PI's dream. Pretty sure Kotohime was in the middle of torture/raping Patchy when we woke up, so I doubt Patchy will forget about her any time soon.

I wonder if Koa will bring it up next time we log into the chat room.

[x] Just spill it.
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Is "it" the whole Kotohime thing, or is it the "we saw you eating Mystia" thing?

[X] Assuring forehead kiss
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[X] Caress her hands with your own.

Lets go the lolicon route.
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[X] Caress her hands with your own.

This seems more in line with PI's personality.
Also, Mori route.
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I'm going to call it for assuring forehead kiss since I forgot to and the vote got close enough to worry me with half the update already written.

Don't worry Mori lovers, you'll be happy.
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File 150247942034.jpg - (90.57KB, 715x1000, cue hatate REEEEEEEing.jpg)
cue hatate REEEEEEEing
[x] Assuring forehead kiss.

You take a step toward Mori, who stands her ground. There’s hardly a foot between the two of you. Her body is tense — it has been since she saw Mystia.

Her eyes remained warily locked onto yours. She’s the type that’s most comfortable with an x-ray view into everyone’s head, and now you’re wearing a lead helmet. “Come on, PI. Tell me.”

Kotohime said she was a monster. She might be. However, this is still Mori you’re talking about. You don’t want to be blind to danger, but she’s your partner. You remember what she said to Hatate, and the promise she made to you.

“I’m not going to say a word about it,” you tell her, “because I want you to tell me when you’re ready.”

Gloom darkens Mori’s expression. “Then you—” she starts, but bites her lip. After a breath, she continues. “You still trust me?”

You squat down, leveling your face with hers. Her eyes don’t waver, but they’re softer — meeker. This isn’t a goddess questioning your faith indignantly. She’s uncertain and prodding you for assurance, and words aren’t going to be enough. So, you open your arms.

Mori’s stare goes blank. “What is this?”

You look at your arms, and then back to her. “I’m told it’s called a hug.”

She sighs. “Very funny, PI. This is seri—”

You reach around Mori and pull her into you, resting your chin on her head. “There’s a lot I don’t understand,” you tell her, “but I’ll believe in you because I want to understand you. I may not like everything I find, but we can work together to set things right.”

The tension in her body seems to melt away as she presses herself against yours. When you pull away from her slightly, she looks up at you — tenderly. Before she can muster any words, you take advantage of her moment of weakness by pushing her hat up and pressing your lips lightly against Mori’s exposed forehead. The scent of dandelions growing in wet soil fills your nostrils. “My faith comes with many difficult questions,” you continue, “but it’s yours if you trust in me as well — partner.”

For a split second you think you see her cheeks flush red, but she quickly throws herself into you and hides her face in your shoulder. “You can’t get all sentimental on me all of a sudden,” she speaks softly into you. “That’s not fair.”

It seemed like a pretty good time to return the favor from earlier. “I thought that’s what was supposed to happen at the end of a date,” you tell her.

Her giggle warms your shoulder. “You’re actually supposed to kiss me for real, y’know.”

You pull away from her, stand up, and frown down at her. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, you cheeky brat. This is a special case — because I felt like it.”

Mori seems to be back to normal with a big grin, though you notice her eyes are a little moist. “Sure, sure,” she remarks, refusing to take you at your word. “But y’know, I can’t believe Hatate’s just stood there and watched this whole time.”

You don’t believe it, but sure enough you hear a familiar-sounding huff and turn to see Hatate standing in front of the door to her new apartment, watching you and Mori with disdain. “Fucking normalfags,” Hatate grumbles. “If you have enough time to put the moves on a pedobait goddess, you should be on the chatroom.”

There’s nothing “normal” about any of this. On one hand it’s embarrassing that Hatate witnessed you and Mori’s little moment, but on the other it seems to have ruffled her feathers a bit — which is fine by you. “Are they still moving you in, Hatate?” you remark to her. “I can’t imagine you being outside for any other reason.”

“For your information,” she begins, averting her eyes. “I was installing some fun things around the building. If you two stop fucking each other in public and ask nicely, I might show you sometime.”

Mori beams a smile at the crotchedy Hatate. “Do you want a hug and a peck on the forehead too? Maybe some sweet nothings in your ear to help you sleep?”

Hatate shudders and retches. “From him? I’d rather become a human so I can get cancer and die.” Then she pauses and thinks — never a good sign. “Of course, cancer is all just another tool of oppression used by the tengu up high. You never heard one bit about cancer before everyone started eating kappa food. It’s the growth hormones they use that—”

You unlock your door while she begins her rant. “I’ve heard this one before,” you tell her, cutting the crow off as you coax Mori inside. “I’ll see you on KRC, Hatate.” You quickly shut the door and relock it. “That rant is a particularly long one,” you explain to Mori. “We’re fortunate to have escaped.”

“I can still hear you!” Hatate yells from outside. “These walls aren’t thick!”

It must be those long ears of hers. “I stand by what I said,” you say for her to hear.

The sound of Hatate groaning is barely audible, and then you hear her open and shut the door to her apartment. Footsteps can be heard on the other side of the wall, but then she goes silent.

“She isn’t wrong,” Mori comments. “You think we’ll be able to listen to her getting rough with herself?”

You stare at her — and she’s dead serious, of course. “For a goddess, your mind sure is in the gutter.”

She shrugs. “When you watch humans being lewd for so long, it kind of rubs off on you.” Then, she grins. “You didn’t answer my question.”

You can admit to yourself — though not to Mori — that listening in on some of Hatate’s self-petting might be interesting. “I sure as hell won’t be putting my ear to the wall to hear it,” you claim.

She rolls her eyes. “You know I can tell when your soul is darkened by a lie, right?”

Oh shi—

Mori watches your reaction, then laughs. “Just kidding! I mean, I could, but it would take some intensive probing that I really don’t wanna do.” Her expression settles into something more sincere. “Besides, I’m supposed to trust you. It doesn’t really say much for that if I can’t keep myself from poking around in your spiritual innards.”

You breathe a sigh of relief. “I thank you for that.”

“So you do want to hear Hatate masturbating?” she continues.

Damn. You fell for her trick. Your reaction may have given it away, but that doesn’t mean you can’t hopelessly double down. “I’m not answering that,” you tell her before walking away from the conversation and towards your bedroom.

“Don’t tell me you’re going to bed now!” Mori calls after you. “It’s not even nighttime proper yet!”

“No, I’m just grabbing my computer,” you call back.


*** reconnected
*** now talking in #kakashi
*** topic is Official Channel for Kakashi Spirit News THE TRUTH | SEND NUDES TO psychicreporter@tengu.com | PI’S LUST FOR YOUNG ASS IS APPARENT
*** set by ~internethatatemachine on Fri Oct 5 17:38:45 2008
*** channel #kakashi mode is +nrst
*** channel created at Sat Jul 23 23:31:01 2005
<~internethatatemachine> so he was outside my door making out with this little girl
<~internethatatemachine> probably got a finger in too
<~internethatatemachine> oh here he is
<Lucy> Hi PI~!
<AgentQ> Hello, PI.
<PI> Very funny, Hatate
<PI> That didn’t take you long, did it?
<~internethatatemachine> im a pro, what can i say
<PI> More like internetpaparazzimachine
<~internethatatemachine> booooooooo
<Lucy> Are you two playing nice again?
<PI> Eh
<~internethatatemachine> eh
<~internethatatemachine> same as always
<Lucy> Good! I’m glad mommy and daddy are getting along. <3
<PI> Gross
<~internethatatemachine> GROSS
*** Lucy (faustianfucktoy@little.lasts.longest) has been kicked by ~internethatatemachine (Reason: SERIOUSLY GROSS)
*** Lucy (faustianfucktoy@little.lasts.longest) has joined
<Lucy> Rude! >:(
<~internethatatemachine> justified
<Lucy> Methinks the lady doth protest too much.
<~internethatatemachine> ugh
<PI> I don’t want to be the target of Hatate’s misguided affections
<PI> Let’s switch topics
<~internethatatemachine> die
<Lucy> Oh please, let’s discuss something else.
<Lucy> For example, the goddess that’s been hiding under our noses, stealing you away from us. >:(
<PI> I take it you’ve all been informed then?
<AgentQ> It was quite a shock, although not entirely outside the realm of expectations given recent events.
<Lucy> She was already a worthy opponent, but now I feel totally outclassed. :(
<Lucy> It’s not fair! If it wasn’t for this stupid contract, I could make this a proper love triangle.

You lean back on the couch and sigh. Mori is trouble enough; adding Lucy into the mix would be disastrous for your peace of mind. It’s a good thing she’s shackled by whatever is keeping her at bay.

The aforementioned goddess divides her attention evenly between the game show on the television and the chatroom on your monitor. “She’s awfully dedicated, isn’t she?” she speaks up, after glancing your way. “Why don’t you just go visit her?”

It isn’t the first time you’ve thought that. “I entertained the notion once to see what she would do, and she told me there was no way. Hatate agreed. Wherever she is, it’s not easily reached.”

Hatate also mentioned that Lucy belonged to a small group of outsiders. They could have some good info, and Mori might appreciate their perspective on Gensokyo. However, you already have enough to worry about for now; it’s best to lighten the load before jumping headlong into another investigation.

<PI> If that’s all you’re worried about, I’d say you guys are taking it pretty well
<AgentQ> I think she will make a good partner for you, as long as you keep an eye on her.
<~internethatatemachine> both eyes

Mori idly flips through the channels while the commercials are running on her show. “I guess I shouldn’t expect any faith from some people on the internet led by a paranoid tengu.”

<PI> Don’t worry, we have an understanding
<PI> But I’m still vigilant
<~internethatatemachine> vigilantly getting into her pants
<~internethatatemachine> face it luce
<~internethatatemachine> youre old news
<Lucy> ;_;
<~internethatatemachine> maybe if you were a little kid like Q you would have a chance
<AgentQ> Please leave my stature out of this.
<~internethatatemachine> cant you change your body to suit the need luce
<Lucy> I’m not one of those. >_<
<~internethatatemachine> couldve fooled me
<PI> How about the autumn goddesses?
<~internethatatemachine> havent mentioned much yet
<AgentQ> Though I am interested.
<PI> Yeah, this has to do with what you asked me to do, Q

You proceed to fill KRC in by more or less repeating what you and Hatate discussed this morning.

<Lucy> More goddesses?
<Lucy> Are you fingerbanging them, too? ._.
<PI> No, I’m not fingerbanging any goddess
<AgentQ> Seems like the gods are going to make a reappearance in Gensokyo one way or the other.
<AgentQ> I didn’t think the Akis would have enough power left to hold another festival.
<AgentQ> That might be distressing to our superiors, Hatate.
<~internethatatemachine> then its an opportunity for us
<AgentQ> Agreed. Only, I’m uncertain of how much of a leash they’re going to give the Akis.
<AgentQ> I don’t think they expect much, but if it ends up creating too much of a blip on their radar, then they’ll reign the goddesses in quick.
<PI> So helping them out too much may end up having the opposite effect?
<AgentQ> Most likely. Unfortunately we can’t be certain.
<AgentQ> There’s also the matter of this Kanako Yasaka.
<AgentQ> I didn’t know she was a goddess, but I’m almost certain she’s been meeting with some of our chiefs.
<~internethatatemachine> why would she be meeting with the kappa?
<PI> If it’s kappa, I can’t imagine it would be anything other than some kind of construction, or maybe swapping outside world tech
<AgentQ> Exactly.
<AgentQ> Unfortunately, I’m not privy to the specifics. If she wants something built, then I’d have to be assigned to the project to know what it is.
<~internethatatemachine> is that possible?
<AgentQ> Hard to tell. If word gets out that she’s a foreign goddess, then the competition will be fierce. Everyone around here goes crazy at the idea of outside tech.
<~internethatatemachine> the brat goddess is watching right PI?

You turn to Mori, who isn’t hiding her fascination with the current topic. “What do you think?”

Mori ponders. “I have no idea. In terms of outside tech, our shrine didn’t have too much. Just basic stuff like a generator, a heater, some appliances, and Sa—err, our shrine maiden had a cell phone and a computer. I can’t imagine the kappa being interested in any of that, since it seems that most of it’s already here in Gensokyo.”

“Then she probably wants to build something,” you assume. “Maybe another shrine, in the city?

Mori sighs. “Could be. I just don’t know. If the tengu are oppressing gods, wouldn’t they disapprove of that?”

An idea comes to you. “A puppet goddess, maybe? If the tengu could parade around this foreign goddess who sings praises to them, wouldn’t it bring them that much more in favor with the city? It would practically legitimize any ideas of their divinity.”

This gets Mori thinking even harder. “It’s hard to imagine Kanako playing a puppet,” she says, “but she’d probably do anything if she felt like she was backed into a corner.”

You turn back to your laptop and summarize yours and Mori’s thoughts for the chat.

<AgentQ> I see.
<AgentQ> As plausible as that sounds, the one weakness in that theory is that kappa wouldn’t build a simple shrine. It’s much too boring.
<AgentQ> The tengu would be asking the human workers in the city to do it.
<~internethatatemachine> so it has to be something else?
<AgentQ> Most likely.
<Lucy> Geez, there’s nothing we can be sure of, is there?
<~internethatatemachine> such is life
<~internethatatemachine> thats why we have PI
<Lucy> Yay!
<Lucy> It’s the Gensokyo ace detective, it’s PI! :D
<PI> I’m not a Saturday morning cartoon
<PI> I can’t do anything about the kappa, but I can stick close to the Akis to help them
<~internethatatemachine> good
<AgentQ> Don’t worry about the kappa; I’m on it.
<Lucy> Hatate loves PI! :P
<~internethatatemachine> good
<~internethatatemachine> WAIT SHIT
<~internethatatemachine> i meant good to Q
<~internethatatemachine> son of a bitch
*** Lucy (faustianfucktoy@little.lasts.longest) has been kicked by ~internethatatemachine (Reason: tricks and slander)
*** Lucy (faustianfucktoy@little.lasts.longest) has joined
<Lucy> >:)
<AgentQ> Oh, and PI.
<AgentQ> I’ll have a payment shipped to you shortly so you don’t starve.
<PI> Anything is appreciated
<PI> Thank you Q
<AgentQ> I imagine budgeting for a goddess isn’t the easiest thing in the world.
<~internethatatemachine> you should have her turn tricks to pay you back

Mori nudges you with a shit-eating grin. “Just out of curiosity, how much would you pay for me? You do like young ass, after all. The Internet told me so!”

“It’s Kappanet,” you correct her, “and shut up.”

You direct your annoyance through your fingers and into the keyboard.

<PI> I’ll knock you out again birdshit
<~internethatatemachine> im just on the other side of the wall
<~internethatatemachine> bring it bitch
<AgentQ> It seems they’ll be able to work out their frustrations physically now, at least.
<Lucy> One way or another. <3
<~internethatatemachine> gross
<PI> Gross


After that, #kakashi descends into its usual trite madness that you can easily tune out.

You’re glad that Lucy and Q took the news about Mori well enough. Compared to the conspiracy crow, they both seem fairly well-adjusted — not that such a thing would be difficult.

Then another KRC window pops up on your screen.

*** Lucy (faustianfucktoy@little.lasts.longest) has started a private chat with you
<Lucy> Hey.
<Lucy> Seriously.
<Lucy> Is everything okay?

Maybe you spoke too soon. You glance at Mori, who is staring a little too intently at the television. It’s obvious she’s going to side-eye this conversation, but you aren’t going to censor yourself for her sake.

<PI> I won’t say it isn’t stressful
<PI> but I’ll pull through it like I always do
<Lucy> Are you sure?
<Lucy> Since you have to deal with this goddess and Hatate, I’m worried about you.
<Lucy> If there’s anything wrong, you can tell me.

There’s a lot wrong even beyond Mori and Hatate, but nothing that Lucy can fix over a computer screen.

<PI> I’ll be sure to keep that in mind
<Lucy> Alright.
<Lucy> Do you hate women with red hair?

Talk about a random question. Red hair makes you think of Kotohime and everything that entails, since it isn’t a particularly common hair color here in Gensokyo. Then again, there was that woman in your dream. She had red hair, didn’t she? Nothing about that made any sense. It was probably your exhausted mind conjuring a meeker, sexier version of Kotohime for some reason. You aren’t really into analyzing dreams since they mostly fall into two categories: useless or Kotohime being bored, which might as well be useless.

<PI> Not because of their hair
<Lucy> Huh.
<Lucy> Have you ever loved a woman with red hair, then?
<PI> Maybe
<Lucy> I see.
<Lucy> Well, anyways, remember that scoop I mentioned before?
<Lucy> It’s happening, and I think you’re going to be a part of it.
<PI> What is it, exactly?
<Lucy> A surprise. ;)
<Lucy> You get letters at your apartment, right?
<PI> If Hina doesn’t lose it and Hatate doesn’t swipe it
<Lucy> Great!
<Lucy> Then keep an eye out for it. It’s a very special invitation! :)
<PI> Will do
<Lucy> Stay safe, PI.
<Lucy> Take it easy and rest if you need to.
*** Lucy (faustianfucktoy@little.lasts.longest) has disconnected from the server


“Weird,” Mori vocalizes your thought for you. “Is she usually like that?”

Come to think of it, it’s a little odd that Lucy would go out of her way to shoot you a private message that isn’t a request for cybersex. Maybe this maternal play is some new kink she’s figuring out.

You shrug. “Maybe. I don’t know her like I do Hatate and Q, remember? She’s relatively fresh.”

“Fresh for the taking?” Mori assumes.

You sigh.


The night brings nothing new, just a lot of Mori laughing at goofy shit on the television. Hatate doesn’t make any noise. You end up nodding off around eight or so.

Rest is nice, because the days aren’t going to get any easier.

[] It’s time to revisit the Aki sisters.

[] You’re a little worried about Marisa trying to assassinate Reimu.
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Both are pretty important, but I'd say ensuring the safety of the fucking Hakurei Shrine Maiden is a top concern, even if PI doesn't know how important she actually is.

[X] You’re a little worried about Marisa trying to assassinate Reimu.

Also I had thought AgentQ was a Akyuu reincarnation, but her working so closely with the tengu kind of nixes that theory.
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[] You’re a little worried about Marisa trying to assassinate Reimu.
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[x] You’re a little worried about Marisa trying to assassinate Reimu.
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That was nice of Lucy. I feel like PI may have sent her the wrong message, though. I wonder what it'll take for him to realize how much of the dream was real.

[x] You’re a little worried about Marisa trying to assassinate Reimu.

I'm not actively worried about this one, personally, but I'm more interested in the cast of characters it's likely to involve us with.

I was pretty sure of her identity from early on, but she does speak (well, type) a lot like how I'd expect your suggestion to talk. The handle could've been a pun, too.
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[X] You’re a little worried about Marisa trying to assassinate Reimu.

So who was Q again?
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[X] Worried about Marisa...

Didn't we JUST read about how giving too much attention to the goddesses WILL backfire?

Good thing too, because I'm all about helping them. I'll hold myself just this once.
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Thought AgentQ was nitori
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[x] You’re a little worried about Marisa trying to assassinate Reimu.

Every time I read an update to this story it smacks me upside the head and reminds me why I keep coming back. There's no one thing that makes me go "wow", it's just an incredibly well put-together world. It feels alive.
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Akyuu is a nice play on words but her name comes from the Bond movies, as the 'gadget inventor' Also, the inspector notes says she is 'Another Youkai in the mountain, but not a Tengu' and 'A long-time friend of Hatate'
She is definitely Nitori. Hell, she'd have to go and help if the mountain needed to build something, how much obvious can it get?
I could confirm it with her mail but she never, ever, disconnected from IRC.

Lucy (Koa?) makes sense with her mail (Faust's story is about him making a deal with the devil to gain knowledge and seduce a girl) However Lucy's meaning escapes me. The girl was named Gretchen. Maybe's it's a moniker for Lucifer and yet another hint at her demonic nature? Maybe.

As for who 'Internet Hatate Machine' is... that will forever remain a mystery. My money's on Yuuka.

[x] Help the gods

You promised.
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[X] It’s time to revisit the Aki sisters.

Agent Q> Agent Cu> Agent Cucumber
plus as the previous anon pointed out Q branch in Bond are the armorers and inventors.
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Thank all of you for reading and voting! I feel like I don't say that enough. Even after a year and then some, it still tickles me that you guys still like what I'm doing.

There seems to be a large enough majority for checking up on Reimu and Marisa, so I'm going to go ahead and call it now. Writing begins.


internethatatemachine: Yuuka, who long ago skinned Hatate alive and has been wearing her flesh as a disguise in order to fight back against the tengu.

AgentQ: Akyuu's secret daughter, my hyper-competent OC and a quirky yamato nadeshiko who PI falls in love with immediately and ends up with in the end after beating up every girl in the story at the same time.

Lucy: A bookish fairy pretending to be Koakuma since her sexual curiosity was awakened after being murder-raped by Flandre (which will of course receive a graphic sidestory in /at/).

But in all seriousness, I think I saw correct guesses for everyone in KRC by the end of the first thread. I just refuse to outright confirm them until they physically appear in the story since I still like seeing what you guys come up with.
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Raftclans I am sorry but I don't get what you talked about AgentQ

I mean I get the Akyuu's daughter thing and the other girl who will be PI's love interest but I don't get this part:

"ends up with in the end after beating up every girl in the story at the same time. "

Can you explan me please?
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It's a reference to an old Spanish folklore hero called "Chiste" who was famous for defeating every opponent by jumping over them.
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Everything in the spoilers for that post was a joke (bad/silly tropes, to be specific).
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>The Lucy story

I called it, I knew all along!

I hope you actually do write that story, I've been looking forward to it ever since I brought up the fairy maid as a joke
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We could always use more fairy tales, so to speak.

It would make a nice "what-if" sidestory.
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File 150352002425.jpg - (226.97KB, 800x792, perfectly innocent and adorable young ghost.jpg)
perfectly innocent and adorable young ghost
[X] You’re a little worried about Marisa trying to assassinate Reimu.


After fixing yourself a meager breakfast and dragging Mori out of bed, the two of you take to the streets once again. You don’t make it out of your apartment until later in the morning, so the only people you see are vagabonds, groups of housewives, and gangs of errant children — with fairies — trying to make the slums into their playground.

Mori yawns and rubs her groggy eyes. “Why are we going back to Kourindou, again?”

It was pretty obvious she wasn’t paying attention when you explained it earlier. “You watched television all night, didn’t you? I’m going to have to impose a strict bedtime from now on.”

“It wasn’t all night,” she counters weakly. “Would you just answer the question? I thought we were gonna start helping Shizuha.”

“Me too,” you reply, “but you saw what they were talking about on KRC last night. We can’t draw too much attention to the Akis or the tengu will shut them down. While I think about how to get around that, there’s something a bit more pressing we need to address.”

Mori thinks for a bit, which is longer than it should take. What did she even watch that kept her up so late? Television after midnight is mostly just bad advertisements from the tengu and kappa. “You mean Marisa?” she finally says. “Are you that worried about her?”

“It’s just a little unsettling,” you admit. “The one time Marisa acts coherent since I’ve known her, and it’s about eradicating the human race. There’s something up with Mima, and I want to get to the bottom of it before someone gets hurt.”

Mori takes the opportunity to pick dirt out of her ear while she walks and talks. “There’s nothing wrong with that, but I remember you said you didn’t wanna seek out trouble.”

“I’m not entirely selfish,” you respond, “but I’m not selfless either. Mima promised a reward for Marisa’s whereabouts, and it would be nice to have Reimu and Marisa indebted to us somehow. If they don’t pay me back, then I can at least get something out of Morichika.”

She flicks whatever she pulled out of her ear away and then grins at you. “Alright, I’m relieved. That’s the PI I know.”

You aren’t sure you like what’s she’s implying. “I do want to help, but I have to be pra—practica—”

Suddenly you stop walking, wind your head back and sneeze hard, spraying a mist of saliva and mucus ahead of you.

Mori winces and recoils backward. “Uh, you alright? I’m not really the type of goddess that blesses sneezes, y’know.”

You sniff a couple of times and shiver as a ice-cold puff of air works its way into your clothes, up the back of your spine and through your torso.

Wait a minute. This feeling is familiar. You pat the cold spots on your body. “Mima? Is that you?”

The cold creeps up your neck and into your ears. “Shh,” her voice whispers into your ear, or from your ear — you don’t really know. “Just play it nice and coooool, my detective friend.”

Mori watches you warily. “What’s she up to now? She isn’t going to possess you, is she?”

“I’m not opposed to the idea of becoming one with you,” the ghost croons in your ear, “but more urgently, I need a place to hide.”

“Hide?” you say out loud, for Mori to hear. “Hide from what?”

Mori’s face brightens with realization. “Okay, I think I see what’s going on here.”

You frown at the enlightened goddess. “Well, I sure don’t—” you start to say, before someone grabs you from behind and spins you around by your shoulder. Suddenly, you’re looking down into the face of a very dour — and close — Reimu.

“Hey,” she grumbles. “You.”

It would be nice if she called out to you before getting physical, but obviously Reimu doesn’t give a shit about that. You frown at her, though nothing you muster could compare to the sheer amount of weariness and contempt Reimu seems to wear every waking moment. “Reimu. Good morni—”

“Yeah yeah,” she says, keeping a firm grip on your shoulder. “You see Mima float by here? She ran off to duck out of work, and it can’t be a coincidence that I found you while chasing her.”

Reimu has some pretty good intuition. In fact, if you’re remembering correctly, she suspected pretty quickly that Mori wasn’t telling the whole truth about who she was — and that she was no little girl. Reimu is definitely someone you wouldn’t want against you.

Therefore, you’re going to sell Mima right out. “She went up my ass, through my body, and is wiggling around somewhere between my ears right now.”

Reimu blinks, but her expression remains hard as stone. “I should have figured as much.”

Mima slowly floats out of your skull, fogging your vision temporarily before she halts above you and Reimu. “You traitor,” the green-haired ghost cries at you theatrically. “Have you no honor, Shinichi?”

With Mima out of you, the chill instantly leaves your bones and the small hairs on your body begin to relax. “None,” you answer her without hesitation. “However, I do have news for you.”

The ghost flips around and lays on her stomach in midair, smirking widely at you. “Ohhhhh? Please, do tell.”

Reimu’s hand on your shoulder gets a little heavier. “Yes,” she says, “do tell.”

“Take it easy,” you tell the shrinekeeper, prying her fingers off your shoulder. “This concerns you as well.”

Reimu sighs. “That’s just what I need: something else to be concerned about.” Then she glares at you. “Well? Out with it.”

“I found Marisa,” you announce plainly.

Mima flies right in your face with a big smile. “You did!? That’s wonderful! I was worried that kid might have went off and gotten herself killed.”

“Hold on,” Reimu cuts in, waving Mima aside. “What does this have to do with me? Is Marisa one of your goons, Mima? You wouldn’t be thinking of getting out of our little arrangement, would you?”

Reimu tenses up, like she’s ready to pounce — and not in a good way. This confirms that Reimu had no idea about Mima’s little task for you. If Mima would’ve told you that, you would have waited until the ghost was alone before breaking the news.

Now on the spot, Mima quickly explains herself. “No no no! Marisa is merely a child who was with me when I was sealed away. I was curious since I hadn’t seen her since being graciously allowed my limited freedom.”

That limited freedom must have something to do with the agreement that was mentioned. Unfortunately, Mima’s words do little to calm Reimu. “You mean she’s one of your students!” the shrinekeeper remarks. Then she turns her rage on you and Mori. “And you two were in on this, too?”

You step in front of Mori. “We don’t even know what’s going on. Mima just asked me to find some blonde girl who gets into trouble, and it turned out to be an acquaintance of mine.”

There’s no reason to bring up what Marisa said — yet. Baby steps. If you laid it all out at once, Reimu might really start throwing punches.

Reimu stares at you, and then lets out a long sigh. “Okay. I should’ve known that — after I loosened her grip on my leash — she would set out to find someone who could take care of her dirty work without asking many questions.”

Mima floats upward and crosses her arms with a huff. “I only wanted to check up on her, Reimu. You can be so untrusting sometimes!”

The shrinekeeper aims a wicked glare at Mima. “I have every reason to be.”

Mori pops out from behind you and raises her hand, drawing their attention. “Excuse me, but it sounds like we have a lot to discuss with each other. Maybe we should find a venue that isn’t in the middle of the street? Perhaps even somewhere that serves food?”

If she’s hungry, then she should have been awake to eat breakfast with you this morning. However, Mori does have a point. The streets aren’t safe for a conversation like this; standing around for any length of time makes you stick out as a target, and you’re still trying to avoid the tengu.

Reimu nods. “Fine by me.” Then she walks ahead, but not before turning back to you and declaring, “You’re buying, private eye.”

Damn it.


“Please have a Kapptastic day, honored customers.”

The familiar-looking purple-haired employee sets the large tray of food on the table and then bows deeply.

Didn’t she serve you last time? It’d be a lie if you said her over-politeness wasn’t cute. “Thanks,” you tell her, since it’s likely nobody else will.

She raises her head and is about to turn away before her gaze halts on Reimu, and her dark eyes widen. “P-pardon me, but do you not belong to the Hakurei?’

“Fuck off,” Reimu replies without even looking at her, focusing all her attention on the King Kappa® she ordered.

The poor girl winces with the sheer force of Reimu’s rejection. “I—I apologize, it’s just, your clothing, I—nevermind. I beg your forgiveness for my transgression.” She forces a nervous smile and gives another bow before swiftly retreating.

“Ouch,” Mori remarks, as she sorts her food from the rest. “A little harsh, don’t ya think? I think the poor girl’s going into the bathroom to cry.”

Reimu doesn’t even give it a thought as she tears into the wrapper of her burger. “I’m not a shrine maiden,” she explains gruffly, “and I’ve got no business with some random fast food worker.”

She proceeds to fill her mouth with a bite of the gargantuan King Kappa® — sans pickles, if you recall her order correctly. Meanwhile, Mori dips a Kappa Nugget® into some Kappa Sauce®.

You and Mima, on the other hand, didn’t get any food. The ghost leisurely floats on the other side of the table from you, and your eyes end up meeting as you sip on your Dr. Kappa®. “How is she?” the ghost suddenly speaks up. “Marisa?”

You aren’t sure how you should answer that. “I think she has all her fingers and toes still,” is what you decide on after a moment’s thought.

Mima chuckles. “That means she hasn’t been practicing enough, then.”

Remiu glowers at her. “I thought you said she was just a girl?”

“She may not have been a student proper, but I did mentor her somewhat,” Mima replies smugly.

“And what exactly did you teach her?” you continue.

“Oh, some sparkles here, and some flashes there,” Mima explains lightly. “Nothing too advanced. She was a child, after all.” Then she thinks. “Come to think of it, she must be close to your age, Reimu.”

“Not interested,” Reimu responds coldly — with a mouthful of food. Then she turns to you. “Are you gettin’ at somethin’ here? I’m still not convinced I need to be around for this.”

Yet, she seemed perfectly content with the situation while you were in line to order. You clear some of your syrupy beverage from your throat. “The girl Mima had me find is named Marisa. She stays at Kourindou most of the time.”

“That weird store?” Reimu remarks. “I’ve heard about it a couple times, and seen it once, but never went in.”

Mima thinks. “I recall the building, but I never saw Marisa around there.”

“She has a habit of wandering,” you continue explaining. “Mostly in the Forest of Magic, looking for mushrooms.”

“You might say she has a problem,” Mori adds.

Mima furrows her transparent brow. “I see. With that type of magic, addiction to the ingredients is an unfortunate inclination among its users.”

Reimu clicks her tongue. “Boohoo. All kinds of people are addicted to the drugs that madwoman in the bamboo forest is peddling through the rabbits. At least this Marisa’s using something remotely natural.”

You aren’t sure if that’s the right attitude, but you push on. “She is also friends with another magician: Alice Margatroid. They have a… complicated relationship. It was while I was meeting with Alice at her home about an unrelated matter that Marisa barged in.”

“It wasn’t a very good tea party anyway,” Mori interjects.

Both Mima and Reimu give you a curious look, but you want to get this over with as soon as possible. “I informed Marisa that you were looking for her and she seemed excited, to put it lightly.”

Mori clarifies for you. “I believe it was something like, ‘I can’t wait to kill all the humans, starting with that Hakurei bitch.’”

If ghosts could sweat, that’s what Mima would be doing right now. “Damn that brat,” she mutters. “I respect her dedication, but—”

Reimu swallows part of her Big Kappa® — which is already over halfway gone — and then turns to Mima. “I see. So what he’s saying, Mima, is that you’ve left a wonderful little mess for me to deal with.”

Mima floats out of her seat and lies across the table in front of Reimu. “D—don’t worry, Reimu. I can straighten her out, I swear.”

“We’re dealing with someone either ignorant or stupid enough to try and kill the one person holding this shitshow of a place together,” Reimu argues. “And don’t lay on the food — you’ll make my fries cold.”

“May I ask what happened to start all this in the first place?” you interrupt them, focusing on Mima. “There has to be some kind of history involved for Marisa to say something like that, not to mention whatever’s going on between you and Reimu in the first place.”

Reimu groans, as if there were nothing she would hate more than retreading the past.

Mima, on the other hand, is more nonchalant about it. “About a decade ago, I heard that the Hakurei Shrine’s power was waning. I thought it was as good a time as any to attack and take the shrine for myself.”

Somehow you aren’t surprised Mima was that kind of woman. “And you were alive then, correct?”

She shakes her head. “Just as dead as I am now.”

That surprises you. Normally, ghosts don’t have that much power or ambition. “Why take the shrine, then?”

“I wanted to become a divine spirit,” Mima answers. “I knew there was a vacancy at the Hakurei Shrine, so I thought that conquering the shrine would be the best way to gain the requisite faith.”

You almost turn to Mori to ask if that’s possible, but catch yourself. Instead, you ask Reimu. “Can that really happen?”

“I dunno and I dun care,” she mumbles through her food. “There’s no vacancy at the shrine, and I’m not going to let some ghost take it over even if there were.”

“I’ve heard of things like that happening before,” Mori speaks up inconspicuously, to actually answer your question. “There are born gods — native gods — and then there are the divine spirits who have ascended to godhood as a result of collecting faith. Usually while they’re still alive, though.”

“Correct!” Mima responds with a grin. “The little girl knows her stuff. Anyway, I attacked the shrine, so the shrine maiden and the priest came out — lil’ Reimu’s parents.”

Reimu cringes noticeably, and you aren’t sure if it’s at the mention of her parents or Mima’s tone — or both.

“They had the legendary Yin-Yang Orbs,” Mima continues, “but it turns out they had grown awfully weak over the years. They both ended up giving their own lives to seal me in a dinky little birdhouse in front of the shrine.”

The story became heavy all of a sudden. You look to Reimu, who is focused on her fries. When she catches you staring at her, she responds with a glare. “What? That better not be pity you’re looking at me with, or I’ll jam the rest of my french fries into your eye sockets.”

You get the feeling she cares a little more than she lets on. “Sorry,” you reply, “I think I’m just starting to fill in the blanks. Please continue, Mima.”

Mima nods, slowly drifting in front of you as she speaks. “Right, so I was sealed in the shrine for a few years until suddenly I’m free. It turns out some outsider tore a big hole in the barrier with their fancy mansion, and the tengu were riding Reimu pretty hard to patch it up. She had been doing okay with basic upkeep, but the advanced stuff was still out of her reach, and she needed me to assist her. I couldn’t help but be moved by her sincere and humble request.”

“It wasn’t anything like that,” Reimu argues. “I pulled you out of that thing and slapped enough seals on you to pin down Amaterasu herself. Then I asked you for a little help with some minor tasks that I hadn’t been taught how to handle, because you were directly responsible for the deaths of the people who would’ve taught me. And you didn’t agree to help at first — if you could kick and scream, you would have been the whole time I dragged you to Misty Lake.”

Mima clears her throat — obviously to move things along, since ghosts have no sinuses or vocal cords that you know of. “Regardless,” she continues, “Reimu and I eventually made an agreement that some of my seals could be removed if I continued to assist her with the barrier.”

“And here we all are — because you tried to ditch work,” Reimu mentions gruffly. “Again.”

“I think I understand,” you say, before they can get into another back-and-forth. “However, I’m still not sure where Marisa got the idea to commit genocide — against her own kind.”

Mima floats away from the table, turning away to hide her face. “Well, that may have been something my followers believed.”

“Because it’s what you told them,” Reimu grumbles.

Mima turns back around and shrugs. “Well, that’s how the game is played. You have to attract minions somehow. I didn’t have any intention to actually follow through on it.”

Mori sighs. “Politics, huh?”

The ghost brightens up. “Exactly! That’s all it was! I didn’t want to call for the extermination of the human race, but I needed to provide a simple and nefarious doctrine to attract all the ne’er do wells dwelling outside of society.”

“So Marisa believed you and still does believe in you, which is why she’s going this far,” you conclude. “And it was all just something you made up to gain followers.”

Mima smiles bashfully. “When you say it like that, it makes me sound like I’m a villain or something.”

“You are a villain,” you and Reimu respond in flat unison.

Mima gasps, then gives up and sinks back down into her original seat. “I know, I know. Look, I offered to talk to Marisa. Wouldn’t that make everything better?”

You’re starting to doubt that. “So you would admit to lying to her and explain that you’re currently serving the Hakurei Shrine to make up for attacking it?”

Mima thinks. “Hmmmm, well, you know. Maybe. Probably. Something like that.”

At least she’s somewhat honest in her dishonesty.

“I have an idea,” Mori speaks up. “Why don’t you hire us as bodyguards? Marisa knows us, and we can make sure the situation is clearly and properly communicated to her before there’s any violence.”

That sounds like a lot of work and trouble on your part, but admittedly it’s the best solution that you can see. You exchange weary looks with Reimu. “I reluctantly agree with my associate’s suggestion.”

Reimu continues staring at you for a moment, then looks down and emits a resigned sigh. “I guess there’s no harm in letting you two follow me around for a while as long as you don’t piss me off. It’s not like I want to beat up some brainwashed girl, even if it would be self-defense.”

Mima sports a proud grin as she floats higher into the air. “Great! Since that’s settled, you two can help Reimu out instead of me! I’ll just be leav—”

Reimu shoots Mima a look that can freeze even a specter. “Not a chance. I’m not going to let you out of my sight again. If you have a problem with that, I can always reseal you.”

Mima dejectedly floats back down to the table. “Yes, Reimu.”

“What were your plans for today?” Mori asks Reimu with a smile, obviously excited to trail the shrinekeeper for a day. It’s entirely possible that, given her curiosity about Gensokyo, Mori set this deal up with that in mind.

Reimu stands up like the world is on her bare shoulders, though she leaves her trash. “Well, today I was going to go—”

[] —back to my shrine, to write up some talismans. There’s someone there who can keep you company, though.”

[] —to Muenzuka, so I can study the barrier’s weaknesses there. You might want to be ready for a fight, because there’s a lot of ‘em around there.”

[] —into the Central District for some routine maintenance. What’s with that look, Shinichi? You don’t like the only nice part about this city or something?”

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[x] Central

This is the story that keeps on giving. I wonder if we'll ever reveal the phenomena that destroyed Faith. I thought it was the Tengu plus you know who shenanigans, but it doesn't explain why were the Hakurei weakened so much.
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[X] —into the Central District for some routine maintenance. What’s with that look, Shinichi? You don’t like the only nice part about this city or something?”

I'm curious what central is like.
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[X] —to Muenzuka, so I can study the barrier’s weaknesses there. You might want to be ready for a fight, because there’s a lot of ‘em around there.”
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They were weak because they were old. And this Reimu doesn't seem weak at all

[x] —to Muenzuka, so I can study the barrier’s weaknesses there. You might want to be ready for a fight, because there’s a lot of ‘em around there.”
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[x] —to Muenzuka, so I can study the barrier’s weaknesses there. You might want to be ready for a fight, because there’s a lot of ‘em around there.”

We can go to Central any time.
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[X] —into the Central District for some routine maintenance. What’s with that look, Shinichi? You don’t like the only nice part about this city or something?”

Given we have a limited pool of ammo which we have to refill out of our own pocket and we don't seem to have blatant supernatural powers or qualities like the others, this feels more manageable as a choice compared to Muenzaka, while giving us more firsthand insight into the capabilities of Reimu and what her job entails compared to going to the shrine.
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[x] —back to my shrine, to write up some talismans. There’s someone there who can keep you company, though.”

Token vote for taking it easy.
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[X] —into the Central District for some routine maintenance. What’s with that look, Shinichi? You don’t like the only nice part about this city or something?”

I don't think we're quite prepared to slum around the entrance to the underworld
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Looks like PI is returning to Central.

The next post will be rated /at/ for lewd content.

I'll link to it here when I post it.
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You can find a very relevant side-post and look into PI's concerns about going back to Central here: >>/at/38308

The real next post will be posted (here) very shortly.
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Fuck that's brutal. I wouldn't even enter the city if that happened in my own past.
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PI is just a bundle of tragedy isn't he.
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surrounded by idiots
“Is it true, PI?”

You stop and glance down at the diminutive goddess, before you realize she couldn’t possibly be addressing what you were thinking about — that last night you spent in Central so many years ago. Whatever Mori’s asking about, you lost track of it quite a ways back. “Is what true?”

“Mima said there’s lots of geishas in Central,” she repeats. “Is that true?”

You sigh. “What’s with you and sex workers?” Then you turn to the ghost who’s pretending to have her attention elsewhere. “And stop giving her weird ideas.”

Mima responds with a smirk. “You didn’t answer her question.”

You frown into Mori’s bright eyes. “I wouldn’t know,” you tell her grimly. “It’s been a while.”

“Are you three finished?” Reimu addresses all of you harshly. “The gate’s just up ahead.”

She’s right. Down the way you can spot the giant wooden barricade that divides the slums from the pristine origins of the city: the Central District.

“Wow!” Mori remarks as the lot of you approach, sufficiently distracted from her former question. “That’s a big wall!” Then she stares at it a little harder. “But really, the traditional architecture kinda clashes with all the concrete and asphalt around here. How long ago was it built?”

“When the village was first founded,” Mima answers for you, “however many centuries ago. I forget.”

You glance at the ghost. “Were you around for that?”

She shrugs nonchalantly, but her eyes are notably sharp. “Maybe. Trying to get a feel for my age? There’s so many other things about me I’d let you feel, you know.”

Mima’s as forward as always. “No thanks,” you tell her. “I felt enough of you earlier.” Ignoring the dejected ghost, you turn back to the curious goddess. “As for the wall, it’s really only a symbol. Long ago it represented the divide between humans and youkai, and now it represents the divide between the poor and the rich.”

“How socially-conscious of you,” Reimu mutters from a few paces ahead.

Mori giggles.“You really are Hatate’s better half.”

Gross. You ignore them and look ahead to the gate, which is manned by at least two officers who are undoubtedly armed. “The real concern right now is how we’re going to get in. Guards at checkpoints around the wall ensure that the only people who get into Central are either sponsored by someone important enough or have enough money to cover the hefty ‘processing fees.’”

“Sounds like bureaucracy at work,” Mori remarks. “What a shame.”

What you left out is that this policy was implemented only after the murders, since it’s widely believed — thanks to the efforts of a certain someone — that the murderer came in from the slums and then retreated back into them when the trail became too hot. They would never suspect one of their own was the culprit, after all. As expected, the change was met with little resistance from the frightened populace.

You hasten your steps to catch up to Reimu. “How do you plan on getting us in?”

She doesn’t even look at you. “I pass on authority from the tengu, and all the guards know that. You’ll be fine as long as you don’t do anything stupid.”

Unfortunately, you can’t be relieved just yet. “Are they still going to search me?”

“Who knows,” she responds, clearly annoyed. “If you’re worried about it, throw whatever it is away. I don’t have time for this.”

Your Hatate-provided fake ID should pass muster, but there’s no excuse for your gun — and you can’t just give that up.

Suddenly something very cold drapes itself across your shoulders. “Leave it to me!” Mima declares, having wrapped her arms around your neck. “I can help. ”

That’s right: Mima’s magic would be incredibly useful here. “Will you turn me invisible?” you request of the great ghost magician.

Mima floats ahead of you. “”N—no, not quite,” she says, “but I can smuggle whatever it is in by flying over the gate.”

“Isn’t invisibility supposed to be magic 101?” Mori remarks to the ghost magician. “C’mon, just make us both invisible.”

Mima deflates. “That kind of low-key magic isn’t really my forte.” Then she adds with a wary look, “And how would you even know what ‘magic 101’ is, girl?”

Mori shrugs. “Eh, y’know. It’s common knowledge, isn’t it? Like uh, poof! That kind of thing.”

You aren’t sure if Mori’s acting dumb or she really is that ignorant about magic. Either way, you’ll just have to trust Mima. “Take my gun,” you murmur to her.

Mima’s face lights up. “Ooooh! Now I see what the trouble is. Y’know, I’ve never held one of these before.”

“Just be absolutely certain not to squeeze the trigger,” you warn her. “You may not be hurt by a bullet, but it will cause a huge riot. These things aren’t exactly common or tolerated.”

“I know that much at least,” Mima assures you haughtily. Something cold in your pants lingers for a bit too long before relieving you of the feeling of your gun. Then Mima floats upward, with your gun floating in her semi-transparent body. “It’s safe with me. Nobody else can see it. I’ll find you on the other side!”

With that, the ghost floats ever higher into the air, until she’s high enough to go over the gate and out of sight.

Your eyes catch Reimu’s glare. “If that’s resolved,” she says, “can we please get moving?”

“It’s almost like you’re excited to go to Central,” Mori guesses.

Reimu turns away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Hurry up.”

Because the work rush is already well over, there isn’t a line to pass through the checkpoint. Reimu leads you and Mori into the gate, not acknowledging anyone or anything as she goes by. The nearby guard completely ignores her, but approaches you. “Hold there you two,” he says. “State your business.”

He’s middle-aged, short with his words, and quick with his eyes. The idea of the “blanket” resurfaces in your mind and instantly weighs on your nerves. You don’t recognize this officer, but he’s certainly a veteran of his post and was likely on the force during the murders. You don’t know if you should even talk to this man, lest something switch over in his mind and undo over a decade’s worth of hiding.

Fortunately, Reimu steps in. “The man and the girl are with me,” she informs him sternly. “They’re helping me out, and I’m kinda in a hurry.”

The guard stares at her hard. “Lady Hakurei, I didn’t think the tengu allowed you to bring guests.”

However, Reimu is completely unfazed. “Do you really want to take it up with them?”

The guard doesn’t even consider before answering, “No.” However, he turns back to you and Mori. “I will need to check both of you, though. Just to be sure.”

“No problem,” you respond with an amicable face. Quickly, you reach into your wallet and show him your ID. “Here you are.”

The guard looks at it, then you. “I see.” Then he glances at Mori. “And who’s the girl?”


“His partner,” Mori says, cutting you off. “Mori.”

You were going to say “niece,” but you should’ve known she would jump on that after what you told her last night. Fortunately, you can improvise. “That’s right,” you affirm, nevertheless. “We work together to help people like Miss Hakurei, who suffer so much from the shackles of poverty and sometimes have trouble meeting even day-to-day necessities.” Then you peer into the guard’s steely eyes. “Would you care to give a donation to help our organiza—”

“No,” the guard answers preemptively. “Just be quiet and let me search you.”

Being felt up by a man is a fairly new experience, and one you hope to avoid in the future. After about a minute of thorough patting, he steps back. “You’re good.” Then he turns to Mori. “Now, for you.”

Mori holds out her arms and legs in obedience, but it surprises you that he only checks her pockets and her shoes before hesitating, and then stepping away. “Alright, she’s good,” he claims. “You two can go.”

Once you’re relatively out of earshot, you turn to Mori. “Are you alright?”

Mori tilts her head. “Huh? Uh, yeah.” Then she looks at you a little harder before catching on. “What, you mean the pat-down? Don’t even worry about that. He didn’t touch anything delicate.”

You sigh. “Unlike me, who received the full treatment. He must have a daughter around your age at home or something. One day that kind of weakness will kill him.”

“I don’t think you should be worried about me or that guard,” Mori says, pointing at Reimu.

The shrinekeeper is noticeably shaking, and her fists are clenched tight. “Damn that idiot guard,” she mutters to herself, “calling me that. Fucking smug piece of garbage.” Suddenly, she spins around to face you and jam a threatening finger in your face. “And you! Call me ‘Lady Hakurei’ one more time and it’ll be the last words you say with a full set of teeth!”

By this point you’re getting used to Reimu’s temper, so you’re more confused than anything. “Sorry, I was just going with the flow. I thought you’d be more upset about the implication that you’re a charity case.”

Her anger dies down into an annoyed frown. “Yeah, well, I do beg around here sometimes. All the rich housewives and sleazy old men like to throw coins at me as they walk by.”

Of course, that’s why she would be excited to go to Central. Remembering the kind of people who would give Reimu money stirs a pessimistic bitterness within you. “Anything for them to feel good about themselves while ignoring the real problem, right?” you remark.

Reimu shrugs. “As long as they’re giving me money, I couldn’t care less how they get their sense of self-satisfaction for the day.”

That kind of attitude doesn’t help the situation, either. “Yet you have enough pride to get offended by being called ‘Lady Hakurei,’” you mention.

She shoots a wicked glare at you. “There’s a nekomata I strangled a couple days ago that could give you some sound advice on curiosity.”

There’s no use in outright provoking her. “Fair enough,” you concede, before turning to a quiet Mori. “Any quips you want to add before we move on, Mori?”

However, the small goddess is already stunned by the sight of Central — very different from that of the slums just yards away. “This is so weird.”

For her, that’s an appropriate reaction. Stepping through the gates is like passing back in time, at least so far as the architecture is concerned. The traditional aesthetic is still valued highly in the birthplace of the city — though mostly as a novelty which its citizens can actually afford, compared to those on the other side of the gate. However, the modern culture the tengu introduced has caught on, openly clashing with the traditional. Someone walking down the street could be dressed in an elegant floral kimono, a flashy t-shirt and jeans, or anything inbetween. Ramen stands are parked next to ATMs, the bazaar is populated with an extreme variety of kappa vending machines, a nearby inn has flashing neon lights advertising karaoke, and there’s a convenience store right across from a feudal manor.

“Hasn’t changed much in all these years,” you remark. “It’s still a clusterfuck — probably even moreso now than back then.”

“You’d think they would be building up because of the limited space, but they’ve kept all these old buildings around,” Mori says. “How do they keep fitting people in such an isolated part of the city? Is the birth rate bad here, too?”

Apparently there’s some kind of birth rate crisis in the Outside World. “Not so much,” you answer. “Last I heard, they were talking about expanding towards the mountain.”

“There’s still too many youkai prowling about,” Reimu chimes in. “Instead, they’re becoming stricter about crime. Now a kid could shoplift once and end up getting his whole family exiled to the slums. Then they sell off the land to whoever’s looking to build another home.”

“That’s one way to keep a law-abiding populace,” Mori remarks dryly. “Y’know, I didn’t think you would pay much attention to politics, Reimu.”

“The person we’re going to meet likes to talk my ear off about that kind of stuff,” the shrinekeeper explains. Then she looks at you for a moment before adding, “I get the feeling you’re going to like each other.”

Reimu usually has good intuition, but you still aren’t going to get your hopes up. “Sorry if I keep my guard up anyway.”

Suddenly, Mima’s triumphantly spectral form swirls in front of you. Your gun hangs very conspicuously inside her, past her bosom. “Special delivery!”

You frown at her. “Are you serious?”

She plays dumb. “Serious about what?”

You sigh and then stick your hand into her chest, quickly wrapping your fingers around the cold steel and pulling it out of the cold mist.

Ahn,” Mima moans as your hand leaves her.

“Give me a break,” you mumble to yourself as you quickly shove your weapon into your waistband. “By the way, nobody can see or hear you, right?”

Mima giggles, but then answers you more or less seriously. “If they have good senses then they might pick up some vague creepiness, but I get the feeling we won’t have to worry about any of the schmucks around here. They’re all sheltered and weak, like cattle.”

You glance around, taking note of the people walking by. They sip from kappa-produced beverages and chat leisurely about their jobs, or what shows they’re going to watch tonight, all without any semblence of wariness — not even as they pass by or even through the ghost floating ahead of you.

“The humans in the slums are the cattle,” you comment. “These people are all sheep.”


The schoolhouse comes into view, and your stomach drops. It’s hardly changed since you were young — looks like there’s only been some basic upkeep to keep it in line with its surroundings. Because the elites were homeschooled, this small schoolhouse became a quiet place reserved for the children of less-wealthy families who could still afford to live in Central. You remember seeing the pressure for your peers to make the leap from middle-class to upper-class — and the pressure started early. Only you and one other person — who had both swiftly abandoned any idea of getting into the upper-class — were exempt from that kind of pressure, which naturally brought the two of you closer.

In that way, this school has far too many painful memories.

“Why are we going to a school in the middle of the day?” Mori speaks up. “Doesn’t seem like the kinda place you would go to for checking on the barrier.”

“Oh, woe is her!” Mima cries out. “Poor Reimu, lost to the throes of naive passion as a mere girl, and forced to concieve! And here, sheltered in this schoolhouse, is the product of her forbidden love!”

Reimu snorts. “Like I’d have such a melodramatic background. There’s a teacher here who hears a lot of weird stories. If she hears something particularly strange and credible, she’ll tell me. Sometimes a tear in the barrier will be the cause.”

“She also makes tea!” Mima adds.

“Her tea is awful,” Reimu says, ‘but it’s still tea, so I’ll take what I can get.”

There’s plenty of female schoolteachers who aren’t good at making tea, is what you tell yourself. However, the very idea that you might have to meet her fills you with a rare sense of absolute dread. You don’t think you’re ready for this. “If it’s all the same,” you begin, “I’ll just wait outside. All you’re going to do is drink tea and chat, right?”

Mori cocks one of her slender eyebrows at you. “Skipping out on a chance to talk with a source? What’s wrong with you?”

You play it off like normal. “I’m just not much for tea parties, especially after the fiasco last time that put us in this very situation.”

However, Reimu cuts to the chase. “It’s suspicious for a grown man with your looks to stand outside a schoolhouse in the middle of the day. You aren’t planning on kidnapping any of them, are you?” Then she glances at Mori. “Is that how he got you?”

Even though you can’t admit it, she hits you right where it hurts. In the first place, you’re being stupid. There’s no way Keine still teaches here. In fact, she might not even be teaching at all anymore. “Fine, fine, I get it.”

As you follow Reimu inside and she has a brief conversation with the groundskeeper, you continue to convince yourself that there’s no way you’re going to meet Keine. She probably found a loving husband who tolerates her condition and has given her a litter of children that will continue to procreate and dilute the wild blood inside them to a negligible amount. Keine herself will have long since forgotten about you — just like all the others. Everyone lives happily ever after.

Reimu leads you, Mori, and a carefree Mima by some classrooms, towards an office. Although the building itself is traditional on the outside, the interior has been updated. The classrooms have hard floors and tidy rows of desks, dominated by the teacher’s podium in front of a chalkboard. Those rigid chairs and tedious assignments remind you how far you’ve come since those days. Maybe you’re even a little nostalgic. Things were definitely simpler back then.

The teacher’s office is a little more laid-back. A cozy atmosphere is nurtured by shelves stuffed with literature and articles, a plush-looking office chair, three wooden stools, and a kettle in the corner. A basic-looking computer, monitor, and keyboard sit on the desk, with numerous yellow sticky notes visible.

“She’s probably getting her lunch,” Reimu remarks. “She likes the lunchboxes from the convenience stores.”

Easy now — there’s probably plenty of teachers who do that. To take your mind off Keine, you browse the old books on the shelf. A collection of volumes belonging to the same work sticks out to you — The Gensokyo Chronicle, written by Hieda no Aya.

Mori pops up beside you. “Is that some kind of encyclopedia about Gensokyo?”

“Maybe,” you say, looking at the cover of one of the volumes. There’s no other information besides the title, the author, the volume number, and a date — which isn’t even from this era. “The name Hieda sounds famil—”

“Oh my, visitors. I hope you weren’t waiting long?”

Your heart skips a beat, and you feel the color drain from your face. The voice coming from behind you is undeniably familiar.

“Nah,” Reimu replies. “Perfect timing, actually. I came to talk business.”

The woman sighs. “Of course you did. Gods forbid you clean yourself up and start showing your face around here more often. You do represent the Hakurei Shrine, even if you aren’t a proper shrine maiden.”

Reimu clicks her tongue. “Spare me the lecture, I’ve heard it all before.”

The woman gasps lightly. “Ah, I’m sorry. I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Keine Kamishirasawa.”

You don’t know why you bothered trying to convince yourself it would be anyone different.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see Mori smile at the woman behind you. “I’m Mori. Nice to meet’cha.” After a pause, she looks up at you. “Uh, hey. Are you paying attention, Shinichi?”

You plaster a smile on your face and turn around. Maybe she won’t recognize you if you act cheerful. “Hello! I’m Shinichi Tsurugi, and—”

When you actually see her, your voice runs out. For a woman who’s supposed to be in her thirties, it sure doesn’t look like she’s aged a day over twenty. Her light blue hair is still as thick and straight as ever, and her skin still looks smooth and pale. The only place her age shows is in her eyes, with a hint of redness that suggests a persistent dryness and bags underneath that can’t be totally concealed by make-up. What really stumps you, though, is her large, ornate hat. You aren’t sure what it’s supposed to be — possibly some kind of temple.

“—I’m, uh, we’re assisting Reimu with her barrier duties today.”

You ignore the strange looks Mori, Reimu, and Mima are giving you.

Keine, on the other hand, smiles politely. “I see. That’s excellent, then.” She sets the convenience store lunchbox down on her desk and offers you her hand — her nails colored a plain, light pink color. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mister Tsurugi.”

You notice her finger isn’t burdened by a wedding band. There’s no pictures in her office of any family or potential lovers or even friends, either. When her eyes meet yours, you notice the way they open just a little too wide. Her mouth, subtly touched with some lipstick, curls upward just a little too genuinely.

You swallow your feelings and shake her hand. “Likewise, Miss Kamishirasawa.”

It’s the worst possible outcome.

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seeing you again
Keine sets a cup of tea in front of you first, then Reimu, and finally Mori. Mima floats idly behind you, creating a slight chill that makes you grateful for the warm tea despite the woman serving it.

“I do hope you’ll forgive me for eating in front of you,” Keine says as she sits down at her chair. “There isn’t much time left before the children are back from physical activities.”

Reimu takes a loud slurp of tea, and then sets the cup back down with little delicacy. “Yeah, yeah. Just let me know if there’s anything specific I should be looking out for.”

You take a sip of your own tea, and swallow it down. She’s a little better at making it than she used to be, but it’s still too bitter — and that’s something, coming from you.

“I haven’t heard much that would be of use to you,” Keine begins, “but I suppose you know that there’s been an incident on the mountain recently? It seems the barrier might be affected as a result of something incredibly large being shoved through it.”

Surprisingly, Reimu doesn’t outright incriminate you or Mori, but her attitude does get even rougher. “Yeah, I’m well aware. How would you have learned about that, though?”

“There’s a woman from the bamboo forest I’ve become acquainted with,” Keine explains. “She picks up a lot of hearsay from youkai.”

Reimu laughs dryly. “They’re probably having a good chuckle at my expense. Bastards.”

You look away from Keine and end up locking eyes with Mori. It’s no surprise to you that your little partner would be suspicious. However, you don’t plan on confirming whatever suspicions she may ha—

“So, Mister Tsurugi,” Keine formally yet gently addresses you. “How did you end up helping Reimu? I didn’t think she could tolerate anyone besides that ghost.”

“I don’t think she can even tolerate me, honestly,” Mima remarks.

“I don’t tolerate anyone,” Reimu answers for herself. “They’re annoying, but it would be more annoying if they aren’t around in this particular instance. I always choose the lesser of two annoyances.”

Reimu’s attitude aside, it interests you that Keine can see and interact with Mima after all. She would have a heightened spiritual sense, if you’re not mistaken. However, the two don’t seem very friendly towards each other.

Unfortunately, Keine’s attention is still on you. She’s likely trying to subtly figure out what you’ve been up to since leaving Central. “Reimu and I have conducted business together in the past,” you explain vaguely. “We have similar methods and interests.”

Reimu snorts, but Keine seems to ignore her. “I see, I see.” Then she turns to Mori. “And how do you fit into this, Miss Mori? Forgive me for saying so, but you look like you should be one of my students.”

Of course, she knows the only way she’s going to get any answers is by picking on whoever seems to be the weakest link. However, what Keine doesn’t know is that Mori is a goddess, with centuries of wisdom and discreti—

“I started living with him after he got wasted one night and took me in off the streets,” Mori answers shamelessly. “I’ve been sleeping with him ever since.”

Damn you, Mori.

Keine stares and smiles blankly at you, and then at Mori. Something has obviously short-circuited under that ridiculous hat. “Excuse me?”

You ignore Mima’s barely-restrained laughter and hurry to clarify. “What she means is that I’ve been letting her stay with me to keep her off of the streets. And we sleep separately.”

“Not all the time,” Mori adds, much to your detriment.

“You don’t have to worry about them, Keine,” Reimu speaks up. “They’re just being idiots.”

Keine snaps out of it and laughs awkwardly. “I—is that so?”

Reimu stands up. “If there’s nothing else, I should get started with my rounds.”

Thank you, Reimu. You waste no time in standing up with her, despite there being some tea left in your cup. “That’s absolutely true. Nice to meet you, Miss Kamishirasawa. Good da—”

Keine stands up. “Wait please, Mister Tsurugi. Why don’t you stay and eat lunch with me? I think I’m somewhat interested in your business. I’m sure Reimu doesn’t need to be accompanied by all of you.”

You glance at Mori, and she returns a particularly nasty grin. “I don’t mind,” she tells Keine. “I’m more than enough to follow Reimu around. Shinichi can stay here and talk business with Miss Kamishirasawa.”

Mori doesn’t know what she’s just sentenced you to. As a last effort, you turn to Reimu.

“Fine, take him,” Reimu says, damning you. “This will probably go quicker without him, anyway.”

it was foolish to assume that Reimu would actually help you. Reimu and Mori leave, with Mima drifting behind them. Keine sees them out and then slips back into the office, shutting — and locking — the door behind her.

At this point, you’ve resigned yourself to the inevitable reunion and confrontation.

“I never thought I’d see you again,” she remarks, staying in front of the door. “I thought you might have gotten yourself killed.”

“Not for lack of trying,” you mention.

“Is that really your new name?” she continues. “Shinichi Tsurugi? It sounds like something you pieced together from the comic books you read when you were a kid.”

It’s not like she’s wrong. “It’s a fake name I use with clients. Most everyone knows me as PI.”

She giggles. “Short and sweet. I’m not surprised.”

You don’t say anything, and neither does she. All you do is watch as her face slowly comes apart. She backs against the door, and then slides down to the floor, holding her knees in close to her so she can wipe her tears on her dress. “I don’t even know how to process this. It’s all bubbling back up to the surface. I hate myself. The first thing I should have done when I saw you was apologize. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“I know you are,” you tell her, “that’s why I did what I had to, back then.”

She looks up at you with her watery eyes, then reaches up and pulls off her hat, revealing a white scalp blemished with grisly scars visible even through her hair. “My wounds never did heal right,” she explains. “All night I kept tearing at them so they wouldn’t regenerate properly. I think I was worried I would try to conceal the history from myself. I don’t know if that was a brilliant idea or an awful one.”

The sight of those scars makes your throat tighten. No matter what she may have done to you, it doesn’t change the fact that you ran away and left your friend bleeding and miserable. “It was a bad situation for both of us,” you say. “I shouldn’t have exposed you to any of it.”

Keine stands up, face now red, and eyes now indignant. “No!” she tells you. “You should have been able to rely on me. I was your friend.”

You swallow the lump in your throat. “It was a long time ago. We all made mistakes. Things have changed.”

She steps closer to you, which causes you to tense up. However, she continues walking past you and sits down in her chair, wiping her eyes. “You’re right. Things have changed, haven’t they? Even if it’s only a little bit.” She frowns at you. “Who is the girl, really? She isn’t your daughter, is she?”

You sigh. “No, she isn’t. I really did get drunk and pick her up off the street. We’ve made things work ever since.”

She frowns. “I didn’t know you drank. Did that start after you left?”

“I drink because I get bored,” you assure her. “I’m not the kind of guy who drowns my sorrows, if that’s what you’re about to lecture me about.”

“Of course you aren’t.” She smiles. “Have you moved on?”

You don’t like her tone. “Moved on how?”

She laughs. “Dating, I mean. Have you met anyone special since… your last?”

“Do you really want to know about stuff like that?”

Keine frowns again, and leans forward on her desk. The whole time, she hasn’t taken one bite of her microwaved lunch, and it’s probably starting to get cold. “Of course I do,” she assures you. “I can still worry, can’t I? You’re all alone in the slums, taking care of this girl and probably getting involved with all kinds of dangerous work to make up for the case you could ‘never solve.’ Surely you aren’t letting the ghost of that woman prevent you from moving forward and finding someone else?”

There’s no way she could actually know that’s literally true, but it still sends a shiver down your spine regardless. This little question is all a terrible act, but you’re not going to be the one to pull down the curtains or play along willingly. Instead, you’ll mess with her script. She wants you to say that you haven’t found anyone yet, but instead you’ll say…

[] “Her name is Hina. She lives in the same apartment complex as I do. She likes to sew.”

[] “Her name is Hatate. We work together, and she recently moved in next to me.”

[] “It’s Reimu. Be sure to keep quiet about it though, since she gets embarrassed about it.”

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I know I said "very soon" like two weeks ago, but I ended up writing two posts instead. Whoops.
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[X] Odd girl named Lucy, head over heels for me but we haven't had much personal contact. It's a long distance relationship but we somehow make it work.

Seems to be the option that's less likely to blow up in our faces. Keine wouldn't be able to do a surprise visit on us in the future with the excuse to 'see' our girl.

Hatate and Reimu would just fight us all the way, the former probably making it worse for us as it is for her.

Hina would most probably be confused as to what's going on or take it extremely seriously to the point of no return.

Koa just maintains plausible deniability- oh shit Keine has a computer.

Do not let her know about the KRC
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i can't choose. help.
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Fuck me I can't pick either. I don't suppose we could just tell the truth? Kiene is being open with us, it's the least we could do
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[x] Odd girl named Lucy, head over heels for me but we haven't had much personal contact. It's a long distance relationship but we somehow make it work.

Technically doesn't even contain any lies, and I want to see more Lucy.
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[X] “Her name is Hatate. We work together, and she recently moved in next to me.”
Seems to be the option that's most likely to blow up in our faces. That's so close Keine is bound to check it out and start some drama.
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Almost missed this vote. Though it almost doesn't matter as I don't know what to fucking pick.

The Lucy angle is good and hard to disprove, but imagine the fallout if that got out to the KRC.

Any other ideas?
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[X] “Her name is Hina. She lives in the same apartment complex as I do. She likes to sew.”

If she asks, it is one-sided love. Hina can't be grilled for information because she doesn't know about it yet.

Hope this is enough to make her give up- but I suspect nothing will be.

I just KNOW she is hearing us from the other side of the door.
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[x] Odd girl named Lucy, head over heels for me but we haven't had much personal contact. It's a long distance relationship but we somehow make it work.

I feel like the Reimu angle could work out as them both knowing he was BSing, but this seems generally safer. I also wouldn't mind telling her the truth but can certainly see why PI wouldn't want to.
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[x] Odd girl named Lucy, head over heels for me but we haven't had much personal contact. It's a long distance relationship but we somehow make it work.
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[] “Her name is Hina. She lives in the same apartment complex as I do. She likes to sew.”
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[x] “It’s Reimu. Be sure to keep quiet about it though, since she gets embarrassed about it.”

PI keeps buying her food, the least she can do is pretend for the sake of screwing with an ex.
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[X] “Her name is Hina. She lives in the same apartment complex as I do. She likes to sew.”

I think she's the best for a cover up like this.
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[x] "...Mori wasn't entirely joking about us sleeping together."

Let the forehead destruction commence.
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[X] “Her name is Hina. She lives in the same apartment complex as I do. She likes to sew.”

I want to see her reaction.
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[x] Odd girl named Lucy, head over heels for me but we haven't had much personal contact. It's a long distance relationship but we somehow make it work.

Aside from this being the hardest for Keine to confirm, Lucy seems like a good enough sort to go along with this if it comes down to it, albeit with an almost-guaranteed effort to turn it from a facade to a reality. But that in itself isn't a bad thing from my point of view. The second best option would be Mori, aside from the implication of pedophilia for people who aren't aware she's a thousand-year old goddess.
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[X] “Her name is Hina. She lives in the same apartment complex as I do. She likes to screw.”

You guys really wanna pick the nameless touhou we've never met? Please.
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[x] Odd girl named Lucy, head over heels for me but we haven't had much personal contact. It's a long distance relationship but we somehow make it work.

When word of this gets to Lucy, fun shenanigans will be had by all.
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It's been neck-and-neck, but I'm going to call it here. Lucy will be PI's cover story, for better or for worse.

>lead girl smugly enjoying the sorrow of the downtrodden
How poetic.

Nice try.
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Damn missed the chance to see Hina's reaction... And there are some feelings there.

At least, now we get to see Lucy's... Oh, wait.
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I'm feeling the same thing and I'm sad as well, but it seems more people want to know who is Lucy finally
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I'm pretty sure it was Koakuma.
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Koakuma. Why is that a question?
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We've already been through this and it was confirmed by Raftclans himself. Lucy is a SDM fairy maid pretending to be Koakuma.
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You mean the post that said that Yuuka was wearing Hatate's skin, AgentQ was a super powered MC and that Lucy was a fairy murder/raped by Flandre? I think that was a joke.

Also, updates when?
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forever alone
You let yourself heave a resigned sigh as you take a seat across from Keine. “Her name is Lucy. She’s head over heels for me, but we haven’t had much personal contact. It’s a long-distance relationship, but somehow we make it work.”

It was inevitable that you would decide to use Lucy. You never tell a lie without assuming that it will be tested, and she’s easily the most convenient co-conspirator. Hatate or Reimu would extort you for it, Q would probably feel uncomfortable, and Hina would likely misunderstand and truthfully assume the role of your girlfriend — which isn’t the worst thing in the world, but you would feel bad for taking advantage of her nature. Mori is completely out of the question, since that would only escalate the situation. That leaves Lucy, who should be both able to understand the situation and extremely willing.

Keine’s eyes narrow. “A long-distance relationship in Gensokyo, where most everything in the city is within walking distance? That doesn’t sound at all suspicious to you?”

“At first I had my doubts,” you admit, “but after talking to her for a year or so, I think she’s really a sweet girl.”

Her brow furrows, like she’s thinking hard about what she should say. Then, after letting a few tense moments pass, she decides to drop it. “I see.” Then a forced smile. “I’m happy you feel that way about her. How do you two keep in contact? By phone, or by computer?”

It takes every good thought you can muster to keep the color from draining noticeably out of your face. Your genius plan has backfired. There’s no point in telling her you have a phone, since that’s so easily disproven.

“By email,” you lie. “It’s like writing letters.”

Keine’s eyes light up. “So you have a computer? That honestly surprises me.” She glances at the boxy computer on her desk. “The tengu gave a lot of these out a few years ago. Hand-me-downs, I heard. I’m still not very good at using it.”

That sounds about right. Hatate did the same with you, but you ended up with something newer than Keine’s computer. It doesn’t look too ancient, but it’s definitely an older model, with a bulkier monitor. “I’m the same,” you reply. “Someone sent me a laptop without any instructions. I eventually learned the basics, but that’s it.”

Keine sighs. “It’s a lot different from how I thought it would be. I’m always so scared I’m going to mess something up. They want to move all our records to the computers, but that sounds like a such a hassle.”

This is good. Small talk is good — whatever can distract her until the kids come in from outside, or Reimu gets back, or the schoolhouse catches fire and you need to evacuate. Anything works.

“So, you’re still a detective?” she continues. “We should exchange email addresses. Some more eyes here in Central would be useful, wouldn’t they?”

You planned for this proposition. Your neglected inbox is a great barrier between Keine and your personal space, when compared to a phone or — gods forbid — giving her your address for snail mail. She would skip over the letter entirely and show up at your door herself. “It’s PI at kmail dot com,” you tell her.

She smiles as she commits that to memory, not that it’s particularly complicated. “Okay, great! Mine is kkamishirasawa at gensokyo dot edu.”

It’s fascinating that the tengu are reigning in the schools to such a degree. From what Keine said before, it seems like they’re prepared to make education entirely dependent on technology and resources that they provide. Hatate would probably have plenty to say on the subject.

“I’ve never really written any emails that weren’t for work,” Keine mentions. “What do you usually talk about with your girlfriend?”

Sex would be your first answer to her question, but there’s no way you’re going to breach that subject with a nosy Keine. “Mostly each other’s work,” you answer lightly. “How our days went. How much we want to see each other.”

All of that is technically true — but that last bit might have been too much, as evidenced by the gloom that darkens Keine’s face. She can’t even force a smile this time. “That sounds nice.”

There’s your chance to flip this around. “My intuition is telling me you haven’t had much luck with dating.”

The sulking expression on her face brings out the shadows under her eyes. “You know full well that I’ve never had any luck with dating. All sorts of men pester me. I can’t count how many of my student’s fathers have tried persuading me into being their mistress. It’s sickening.”

You’re painfully familiar with that element of society. “Some things never change. I think everyone in school asked you out at least once, and a lot of them were already engaged.”

“And of the few I accepted, they would leave once they realized how much of a hassle I am,” she adds. “Not to mention all of the girls who despised me for it.” Then she smiles bitterly, and purposely avoids your eyes. “Out of all those boys, there was only one I could call a friend.”

“He was an asshole,” you assure her sternly. “You’re better off.”

Your attempt at self-deprecation only deepens the hole you’ve stepped into. Keine’s head sinks lower, as she stares into her own hands. “Am I? My coworkers and neighbors are starting to distance themselves from me. They’ve noticed I stopped aging in my late teens.” Then she eyes her untouched lunch with disdain. “I rarely eat any more, and if I do it can’t be garbage like this. I just buy something and throw it away to attempt to keep up appearances. Even then, it won’t be long before the accusations start to fly. I might have to use my powers just to stay here.”

Her condition has certainly accelerated; it sounds like she’s more youkai than human at this point. There’s a possibility that it’s natural, or it could have been exacerbated by the way she used her powers back then — for your sake. The very idea of you being even slightly responsible creates a sinking feeling of guilt in your stomach. “Then why not leave?” you offer. “There’s people like you out there, people I can introduce you to—”

You’re cut off by a cold glare from Keine. “That’s the difference between you and me. You always wanted to run away and quietly handle everything yourself. I can’t do that. These students need to learn, and with my… abilities, I feel like I have to be the one to teach them. If I don’t pass on my knowledge to the new generations, then why do I even have these powers in the first place?”

She isn’t wrong about you, but you don’t agree with how she sees her power as a duty. If all these years in Gensokyo have taught you anything, it’s that reason and meaning are hard to find. You aren’t inherently a pessimist, but you can consider this: an outsider wanders in, a youkai devours them, the youkai eventually fades away, and nobody ever realizes any of it ever happened except maybe an apathetic Reimu when she cleans up the remains. It’s just something that happens, and it’s the same with Keine’s power: anyone could have been cursed by that beast, and she never asked for it. There’s nothing stopping her from living outside the city except her vain idea that she’s obligated to help fix the people in this city — and you know that’s how she sees her teaching. In your opinion, her time would be better spent on those who suffer like her, who could truly use a helping hand.

But you know none of that will convince her. This isn’t a new conversation, and the years apart from her have only dulled your interest in arguing. What you’re looking for now is an out.

Keine’s eyes idly find the analog clock sitting on her desk. “Ah, I apologize. My lunch break is almost over.” Then she stands up. “I really should be getting back to the classroom.”

There it is. You waste no time in standing up, though your eyes fall on the full lunchbox in front of Keine. “You want me to get rid of that for you? People might ask questions if they see a full lunchbox in the trash.”

She laughs. “Still looking out for me? Whether it’s the woman who tried to kill you, the woman who erased you, or a homeless girl off the street — the only thing that changes about you is who you’re willing to stick your neck out for.”

“Yes, I’m sure I’ll always be criminally oblivious,” you assure her dimly. “Are you going to hand it over or not?”

Keine walks around the desk and places it in your hands directly, staring into your eyes gleefully. “Thank you, PI. Please keep in touch this time.” Then she unlocks the door, causing you to nearly sigh with relief.

Outside her office, you tuck the convenience store lunchbox under your arm and bow slightly. “So long, Miss Kamishirasawa.”

With one last smile, she turns and walks away.

You find your way out of the school easily enough, and curiously enough, walk through a pocket of cold air as soon as you step outdoors. “You weren’t eavesdropping, were you?”

“Me?” Mima replies, her spectral body descending from above. “Never! I stayed behind to guide you back to Reimu and your little partner after you were finished speaking with that teacher.” She pauses while she reads your face. “That chat took longer than I thought it would, since you seemed so eager not to be there. I suppose you wouldn’t be willing to share what your relationship is with that woman?”

“I have no prior connection to Keine Kamishirasawa whatsoever,” you state truthfully. “She was only interested in getting my contact information and learning more about what I do.”

Mima shrugs. “Fine, fine. You wouldn’t fault a ghost for wondering, would you?”

“As long she stuck to wondering and didn’t make the leap to interrogating,” you tell her, before changing the subject. “Where are Reimu and Mori?”


Mima leads you a short distance away, where Mori and Reimu are standing on the street corner. The former holds a small paper cup with both tiny hands, while the latter watches with a faint amount of interest.

“Can’t ya please spare sum change, sah?” Mori calls out to the scant passersby. “My sistah and I need just a few yen to get by, or else we’ll hafta mule drugs for the rabbits! I don’t want butterfly dust crammed up my bum! Please, anythin’ will do!”

You approach the two girls quickly, and stop in front of Mori. “This is an interesting way of helping Reimu.”

Reimu comes up behind Mori, looking more protective of the money in the cup than her accomplice. “What are you, a cop?”

Mori parrots her fake sister with a saucy grin. “Yeah, what are ya, a cop?”

You were, which means this isn’t the first time you’ve had this sort of encounter. That might be why you don’t have any inclination to play along. “If you’re done investigating,” you tell Reimu, “we should leave.”

“Not until I get money to feed mysel—” the shrinekeeper begins, before her dark eyes fall on the lunchbox in your hand. “Wasn’t that Keine’s? What, was she not hungry or something?”

It doesn’t sound like Reimu knows anything about Keine’s condition. “No, she let me have it because she bought the wrong one,” you answer.

It isn’t the best lie, but it doesn’t seem to bother her. “Are you going to eat it?”

“We ate like an hour ago,” you mention.

“So that’s a no,” she continues. “If you hand it over, we can leave now.”

You thrust it into her hands. “Good. Let’s move.”

Reimu swipes the cup from Mori and then walks ahead, with Mima following close behind her and laughing. That just leaves Mori, who’s staring up at you with big eyes. “Are you expecting something?” you remark.

She beams a smile. “Did’ja like my accent? I tried really hard to get into character like Big Sis told me.”

You leave her and start walking, not making it three steps before she follows alongside you and grabs your hand. “What gives? Are you upset I left you with that woman? If it bothered you so much, you could have just left.”

It would have been nice to have this conversation at home so you could have some time to collect your thoughts, but you might as well vent your frustrations on Mori now if this is how she’s going to be. “I really couldn’t,” you begin, doing your best to keep a level tone. “I know it’s easy for you to act like you know everything, but you don’t. It’s unfair for me to get angry at you for something I haven’t even told you about yet, but this wasn’t exactly a planned trip and it’s going to be a huge pain in the ass for both of us if Keine decides to nose her way into our lives.” You take a deep breath before concluding. “Just promise me you’ll stop screwing around, especially when you know you aren’t supposed to.”

Mori blinks a few times, then sighs. “I guess I wasn’t acting like a very good partner, huh? Especially after everything you said last night.”

You’d rather not think about that embarrassing little moment. “You weren’t,” you tell her, “but I’m not exactly the best partner either, which is why I’m willing to call it even.”

Mori smiles at you. “Okay! From here on out, I solemnly swear that I will act only in good faith!”

You chuckle and end up grabbing her hand back. “We’ll see how long that lasts.”

She tugs on your arm. “Hey, it would be a big problem for me if you thought your faith was misplaced, y’know. I have a duty to follow through on my promises.”

That could have gone a lot worse. You’re happy that Mori can be considerate — at least when she wants to be.


There’s no problem getting back into the slums — if anything, the guard is almost eager to let you through. The somewhat-populated streets near the gate give way to solemn paths that you recognize as being somewhat close to your apartment.

You direct your concern to the leader. “Where are we going, Reimu?”

“Back to the shrine,” Reimu responds. “You’re waiting for me to get jumped, right? If someone’s going to get me, it’ll be on the way back home.”

That’s sound reasoning. “Okay. Honestly, I’m a bit curious to see what the Hakurei Shrine looks like.”

Reimu groans. “Hopefully we don’t make it that far.”

Mima chuckles and floats in front of you. “She’s embarrassed because she keeps the place so tidy and clean. It’s just plain out-of-character for her.”

All you can read on Reimu’s face is the desire to reach out and choke the ghost, but unfortunately for her, that would be impossible. “I really will seal you away again,” is all she can come up with.

In that tiny moment, you feel for Reimu.


The familiar itch of cooled sweat doesn’t even bother you any more. By the time you reach the many steps leading up to the Hakurei Shrine, your legs are aching and you’re short of breath from trying to keep up with Reimu’s brisk pace. “There’s no way you walk that overgrown path every day,” you say to the shrinekeeper after catching up. “Not to mention these steps.”

Reimu doesn’t seem fatigued at the slightest. She has, however, opened what was supposed to be Keine’s lunch and started greedily inhaling handfuls of food while waiting on the bottom step for you. “My daily life keeps me in shape and my metabolism fast,” she responds with a mouth full of food, “unlike yours.”

You can’t exactly say she’s wrong when you’re panting like you are. “Yeah, yeah. Once I catch my breath I’ll be good to head up those stairs.”

Mori, who has been effortlessly hiking beside you, stretches. “Don’t worry,” she tells you, “I can always carry you up the steps if you need it.”

You’re the only one who knows she isn’t joking. “I appreciate the sentiment, but I’ll have to decline.”

As you recover, you take the opportunity to soak in the forest around you. Unlike the Great Youkai Forest with its large trees, or the Forest of Magic with its toxic spores, the path leading to the Hakurei Shrine is calm and quaint — more like stroll through the woods than a proper forest. If the path leading here wasn’t so ill-maintained and Reimu’s pace wasn’t so quick, it would have been a pleasant walk. When you asked Reimu why she didn’t take care for the path leading to the shrine as well, she simply replied that it wasn’t in her job description. That would certainly explain why so few people even know where the Hakurei Shrine is.

What’s more important is that there’s been no sign of Marisa. There’s always the possibility she ate some mushrooms and forgot about it, but Mima’s been looking a little wary ever since you left the city. You watch the ghost as she floats casually between you and Reimu. “Mima, do you think Marisa would ambush us here?”

Mima perks up, and grins at you. “I think I can imagine what she’s planning, and it’s not nearly as elaborate as you might think it would be. If she learned anything from me, she’ll probably make some kind of bold—”

Hakurei shrine maiden!"

Marisa’s somewhat-husky voice travels down the stone steps and through the trees. Up at the top, dwarfed by the large, red gate, is the small blonde girl you’ve been expecting—

[] —standing on top of a floating broom.

[] —holding a bag full of mushrooms.

[] —surrounded by a gang of fairies.
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[X] —standing on top of a floating broom

Shit just got real
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[X] —standing on top of a floating broom.

These Keine/PI interraction is so melancholic.
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[x] —standing on top of a floating broom.

In b4 it's hanging from the torii on wires.
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[] —surrounded by a gang of fairies.

It's would be great funny looks
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[X] —standing on top of a floating broom.
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Why couldn't he go out with her? All I could find is him saying that it is too "tempting"?

>Writefag confirms that Hina would have become PI girlfriend for real just to fit with his lie.

I hate you so much, Koakuma voters.
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[x] —surrounded by a gang of fairies.

C'mon, faeries are great.
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[X] —standing on top of a floating broom.

Come on, she's a real magician, right?
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why oh why did I shitpost
> Writefag confirms that Hina would have become PI girlfriend for real just to fit with his lie.

Where was this said and WHY WASN'T I INFORMED.
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>It was inevitable that you would decide to use Lucy. You never tell a lie without assuming that it will be tested, and she’s easily the most convenient co-conspirator. Hatate or Reimu would extort you for it, Q would probably feel uncomfortable, and Hina would likely misunderstand and truthfully assume the role of your girlfriend — which isn’t the worst thing in the world, but you would feel bad for taking advantage of her nature.
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>[...]and Hina would likely misunderstand and truthfully assume the role of your girlfriend — which isn’t the worst thing in the world, but you would feel bad for taking advantage of her nature.
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[X] —standing on top of a floating broom.
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> but you would feel bad for taking advantage of her nature

Ah. Okay, glad I did vote for Mori then. Carry on.
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[x] —standing on top of a floating broom.

Poor Keine.
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[x] —standing on top of a floating broom.

I bet this is some wuxia-style wires and pulleys. Either that, or Marisa's finally consumed enough psychadelics to pierce through the veil of mundanity and achieve arcane consciousness.
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Calling it for the broom as I start writing, just in case there's any freak upsets.

PI's 0 for 2 when it comes to understanding women on the most basic level. Do you really think he's entirely reliable?
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With the cute and charming Hina he's oblivious, sure. Im sure what she said about Alice replacing her,her stalking and constant good predisposition can be reasoned out to be just kindness.

But what is going on with Keine? Why is he so adamant in avoiding her obvious attraction? Does he think he's bad luck and the world is best without him on it? He doesn't want to live in central? He doesn't want to be 'mind controlled' if she loses it again?
Wait that last one made sense.

Fuck it, Keine route go.
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>Why is he so adamant in avoiding her obvious attraction?

Would you want to date someone that tried to rape you?
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Hell, that's only a part of it. Would you want to get into a relationship with someone who not only raped you to try and prevent you from leaving, but also tried to end it in forced impregnation so that you would remain out of a sense of guilt and obligation to the kid?
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It kinky.
>so that you would remain out of a sense of guilt and obligation to the kid?
If I'm not mistaken, Keine was about to rewrite history so that PI and her has always been married, with no one but her knowing the truth. So not forcing him to stay because of obligation to kids, but making him stay because they've always been married all along. Which might be worse.
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[x] —surrounded by a gang of fairies.

Because every boss encounter needs a some flunkies.

Just powered my way through this story, its been quite a ride.
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I'm having a little difficulty with the update so it's taking longer than I wanted. I'll try and power through it during my downtime this weekend, so expect it in the next couple of days.

Kudos to you. I hope you enjoy it moving forward. I'm kind of slow updating compared to some others, so sorry in advance.
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stars lasers and beams
[x] —standing on top of a floating broom.

It seems like an optical illusion brought about by your angle of sight, but Marisa really is balancing herself perfectly on an ordinary-looking straw broom — hovering steadily about five feet in the air. Tucked underneath each of her arms is something, but you can’t tell what.

It only takes a split second for Reimu to realize what’s happening, and she turns to you. “So, this is that Marisa girl you were talking about?” Then her heavy eyes fall on Mori. “She doesn’t seem much bigger than you, kid. Even with magic, how can she be a threat?”

Mima floats in front of her, grinning. “Oh, Reimu. You aren’t underestimating one of my students, are you? I can think of two others who thought so highly of themselves and ended up in quite a tragic situation because of it.”

Reimu stares at Mima, and then breaks out into a fit of laughter that is far from jovial. The sight of Reimu expressing such unhinged emotion sends a chill down your spine. “Is that what this is supposed to be?” she remarks. “A destined rematch between the next generation? What a disgusting joke!”

While Mima remains silent in the face of a cackling Reimu, you notice a spark of light coming from Marisa’s direction that sends a jolt of action through your body. You tackle Reimu and hit the ground just in time to see a ray of light pass overhead and sear into a tree behind you with a loud hiss.

Your sigh of relief is rendered moot by the fact that you now have Reimu pinned to the ground by her bare shoulders. This is your first time touching Reimu, and you’re astounded by how hard her arms are. Despite the compromising position, it’s difficult to see her as anything close to feminine when her muscles are like carved stone.

Surprisingly, Reimu only gives you her usual glare. “If you’re done groping, I would suggest getting off me.”

“Right,” you answer, promptly doing so. “Sorry about that.”

”The only reason I didn’t castrate you with my knee was because you saved me,” Reimu adds sternly, as she stands up herself. “Remember that.”

“You’re welcome,” you respond.

Mori nudges you and whispers, “Tell me how it felt later.”

You frown at her and whisper back, “Where were you? Are my reflexes really better than yours?”

The little goddess smirks at you and shakes her head. “I just wasn’t paying attention, is all. What you did was pretty impressive though. As expected of the man who can hold his own against youkai.”

You ignore her as Marisa slowly descends — coming within speaking distance, but still remaining out-of-reach. She stares down at you all with her arms crossed, and casts a particularly disdainful look at you. “I didn’t think you’d betray me to join the Hakurei maiden, PI. I was thinkin’ about sparin’ ya for helpin’ me out back then, but not any more.”

“I don’t give a damn whose side you think I’m on,” you tell her, “I just don’t want either of you to get hurt.”

“That ship sailed when she looked down on me from my own shrine and then fired a laser at me,” Reimu mentions darkly. “I have to beat some sense into her, now.”

“Not much of a shrine though, is it?” Marisa responds, with a playful grin. “I went lookin’ for those legendary orbs Lady Mima used to talk about all the time, but I only found these.”

Marisa carelessly tosses away what she was holding — two identical, palm-sized orbs — which roll down the steps to Reimu’s feet. “Ain’t much legendary about ’em,” the thieving witch continues, with a shrug. “Even someone like me can tell there’s nothin’ left in ‘em.”

Reimu stares down at the two orbs, which conceals her face from you. Then she raises her head, revealing clenched teeth and wild eyes. In her hand is a fistful of white talismans. “You’re dead.”

To your discontent, Marisa is able to match Reimu’s intensity with her own wide-eyed, manic smile. “Not before you, Hakurei shrine maiden. I’ll kill you for taking my master away from me! Then I’ll find Lady Mima and serve her once again!”

The way Marisa talks gives you cause for concern. At first you think Mima might have escaped when Marisa showed up, which would explain why neither of them have said anything to each other. But no, Mima is still lingering above you — watching Marisa with a poker face.

Any questions you might have are put off by Marisa raising an arm in the air and bellowing out, “Magic Sign ‘Milky Way’!”

A circle of magic hovers around Marisa before releasing a painfully bright stream of multi-colored stars at you, Mori, and Reimu. You fling yourself out of the way, hit the ground on your stomach, and notice Mori lands right at your side. Reimu jumps the opposite way and has enough dexterity to remain on her feet and continue weaving between the projectiles while slowly but steadily approaching Marisa. The stars that Reimu evades hit the ground with a loud thud before dispersing into a fading mist. Those that strike the surrounding trees end up rattling the trunks enough to shake leaves off the branches. Shizuha would be pissed if she saw this.

Observing the spectacle quickly gives you a headache, however. You can hardly watch it, much less participate in it, so you’ll keep your head down for now. Fortunately, Reimu still has sense enough to keep dodging the other way — drawing Marisa’s attention away from you and Mori. Whether Reimu is making a conscious effort to keep you and Mori safe or has completely forgotten your presence in her rage is still up in the air.

“You think we’re going to be able to stop this fight?” Mori speaks up, watching the same scene you are with a far more amused look. “Seems like there’s more history between the two of them than we thought.”

Your initial plan was to have Mima help negotiate a truce, but “help” and “Mima” don’t really go together. The ghost is still floating above, watching the fight with an unreadable expression — like a judge. If she did set this up like Reimu suspects, then there’s no way she’ll help you end it. “All we have to do is prevent the killing blow so we can get to the bottom of this,” you tell Mori. “This kind of magic isn’t very lethal, is it?”

“Probably not,” Mori replies. “But if I were Marisa, I would be using this kind of weak, rapid-fire spell to exhaust Reimu before finishing her off.”

You wouldn’t normally attribute that kind of tactical thought to Marisa, but something’s definitely changed about her ever since she regained her purpose. That witch isn’t who you’re most concerned about, though. Even as Marisa conjures more and more shooting stars, Reimu dodges each one of them while coldly staring down her attacker, pursuing her around the clearing and then up the steps to the shrine. Reimu’s movements and reflexes are far above what you’ve ever seen possible — it almost seems like she’s vanishing and reappearing when she avoids Marisa’s magic.

“We may have to let them fight it out for a little bit,” you say. “As long as they both have this much energy, we’re only putting ourselves in danger by trying to separate them.” Then your eyes wander over to Mima once again. “But we might as well strike up a conversation with our fellow audience member in the meantime.”

With most of the action a comfortable enough distance away, you push yourself off the ground and walk under Mima. “Having a good time?”

Mima grins at you and descends. “Oh, you’re still here?”

“Thanks for the consideration,” you reply, before you both turn your attention back toward the fight.

Reimu throws some of her talismans at Marisa, but Marisa soars higher to evade them while unleashing a final burst of stars that spin inward to catch Reimu while she’s off-balance. Unable to dodge, Reimu throws the rest of her talismans in front of her and creates a gap to slip through. From what you’ve seen thus far, those are probably some kind of anti-magic talismans — you’d imagine she would keep plenty on hand to counter Mima-related shenanigans.

Eventually you have to break the silence between you and the ghost. “Marisa can’t see you, can she? Are you hiding yourself from her?”

“No,” Mima answers quickly. “It seems that she’s unable to see me. A shame, really. It would’ve given this little duel more of an emotional edge.”

You’re beginning to wonder if Mima really did set this up just for a good show. “The last thing this situation needs is more emotion,” you respond dimly. “Why would she be unable to see you?”

Mima lets the question hang a bit before answering. “I don’t know. The spiritual world is full of mysteries, isn’t it?”

“Going by what I’ve heard from both Marisa and yourself,” Mori speaks up, “it seems there’s a lot of dissonance between how she perceived you and who you really are. Her image of you appears to be that of some genocidal overlord, and you told us that was an act from the beginning. Even then, I have a sneaking suspicion she never had that much interaction with you in the first place.” She smiles. “Am I wrong?”

Mima’s grin falters as she stares harshly at your partner, but eventually she steadies her expression. “I’m starting to have my own suspicions about you,” she tells Mori, “but you’re probably right. Her admiration of me was one-sided. To me, she was just another one of my followers. But while the others either died or forgot about me over the years, her deluded image of me has only grown stronger. Now she can’t even see the real thing in front of her.”

She really wasn’t lying when she said the spiritual world is full of mysteries, but you understand more or less that Marisa’s still suffering from Mima’s little act back then. It would be easy to blame all this on Mima, but Marisa must obviously have some deep issues for her to cling to the image of a genocidal overlord so long after she was defeated.

“So what’s your goal?” you continue interrogating. “Who are you even rooting for?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Mima answers immediately. “I wanted to see Marisa again, and I wanted her and Reimu to meet. Anything after this is just entertainment.”

“You’ve certainly accomplished that, at least,” you remark dryly. “I hope you’re ready to take responsibility.”

Mima shrugs. “Responsibility? Eh.”

You and Mori share a sigh. “At least help us stop them from killing each other,” you tell her.

Mima chuckles. “Fine, fine. I suppose I can do that much.”

In the meantime, it seems that Reimu has been stuck on the defensive after using the last of her talismans to disperse Marisa’s first spell. The two girls have been running circles around each other and are starting to show signs of weariness. Reimu has obviously grazed some lasers judging by the burns on her clothing, while Marisa looks dizzy and winded. While Reimu dodges some more lasers, another magical circle appears around Marisa and she declares her next spell.

Ritual Sign ‘Orreries Sun’!”

Four colored orbs encircle Marisa: one blue, one red, one green, and one gold. They orbit slowly at first, but quickly pick up speed as Reimu watches carefully.

You glance over at Mima and notice that she’s also watching with a surprised look. “That’s my spell,” she mutters, “but I never taught it to her. Did she come up with it herself after watching me?”

Suddenly you’re drawn back to the fight when you hear the distinct sound of magic, and find that each of the orbs is shooting magic bullets down at Reimu, who once again is forced to spend her time evading.

You can see Marisa growing visibly flustered as Reimu keeps sliding between shots without taking a single direct hit. “Why can’t I get you?” she cries.

With a flourish of the witch’s pale hand, the orbs fire large beams of light that converge on Reimu — or at least, where she was a second ago. Reimu’s reflexes really are superhuman.

However, Mima is less impressed in Reimu and more disappointed in her follower. “Really, there’s no use in copying the spell if you don’t know how to use it properly,” she comments.

Marisa adjusts her footing on her broom and grows a malicious smile. However, in her eyes you can see the strain. You wouldn’t know how magic taxes the body and mind, but you can get a vague idea from how gaunt her face is starting to look, and the slightest tremble you notice in her legs.

Reimu, on the other hand, is stone cold like always. However, her hair is even messier than usual and her body is glistening with sweat — not to mention the unfortunate tears in what was already a tattered piece of clothing. You briefly wonder if she keeps any spare outfits.

“Looks like I have to get in close to win this after all!” Marisa calls out, while cracking her knuckles. Then she kneels down on her broom and holds her fist back, which starts to glow with magical light. “I hope you’re ready for this, Hakurei shrine maiden!”

Reimu glares up at Marisa, and you notice the faintest tint of light coming from her own body. It seems that Reimu wants to finish this, too. In fact, you would bet that Reimu has been waiting for Marisa to get frustrated enough to try getting close so she can knock her right off that broom. However, if Marisa’s next attack is too strong and Reimu’s too worn out from the constant footwork, it will be Marisa’s win.

Magic Sign ‘Stardust Reverie’!”

A final magic circle forms around Marisa, and this time her whole figure becomes encased in shining blue light. Then all of a sudden she’s rocketing forward on her broom, leaving a trail of bright blue stars in her wake, and approaching Reimu with her burning fist reared back.

Reimu stares the witch down without even flinching. The light in her body becomes even brighter, taking on all the colors of the rainbow, and she mutters something you don’t hear before charging head-on at Marisa.

The impact of the two blinds you first and then sends out a shockwave that nearly takes you off your feet. The grass and trees shake, and you hear branches fall from the trees. You glance over at Mori and Mima who are delighting in the spectacle — both entranced by the kaleidoscope of colorful lights that your eyes aren’t strong enough to stare into.

When the special effects begin to fade and you can see the two girls again, one is laying motionless on the ground and the other is standing over her menacingly. As the remnants of magic disappear entirely, you can see that the victor — and the girl you’re going to have to stop — is…

[] Reimu.

[] Marisa.

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I have no time for games
[x] Hina

I couldn't resist.
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[x] Reimu.

Much as I like Marisa, I have to vote for the one who's not trying to go on a genocidal rampage.
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[x] Reimu.
Honestly it feels like Reimu handled the battle better with less visible signs of strain.
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[X] Aunn.
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[x] Reimu.
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[x] Mima

gonna be honest, I have no idea how this would even work. Which is exactly why I'm voting for it
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[X] Reimu.
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[X] Mima
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[x] Reimu.
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[X] Reimu.

I kinda want to not stop anyone and let Reimu kill Marissa, but that's just my bloodlust talking. I think.
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{X} Reimu

I know she is who won. Reimu is very powerful
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Hey man, slow updates are better than no updates in my book.

[x] Marisa.

I know usually Reimu v Marisa goes only one way, but just this once. . .
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Not that it's much of a contest, but I'll go ahead and call it for everyone's favorite main character.

Nice tries.

You're a monster, though. But I still would've made it work if this actually won.

I'm kind of ignoring the newhus for the sake of muh continuity.
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[x] Reimu.

The shrinekeeper stands triumphant over the face-down, twitching witch. She glares down at Marisa for a tense moment before spitting at the ground and walking back toward you, Mori, and Mima. Although she starts off well, she eventually starts to waver and her steps become unsteady. You swiftly meet her halfway. “Are you alright, Reimu?”

“Dizzy,” is her quiet, curt reply. She holds herself up with your shoulder and catches her breath. Her face looks pale — drained, even — and her eyes are blank. By the time you realize what’s about to happen, you can already feel her warm vomit soaking through your pant leg. Thankfully you’ve been exposed to far worse than a young woman’s puke in your lifetime, so you stay still and accept it so she doesn’t fall over.

“Sorry,” she mutters after, with some vomit drool still dripping down her chin. “Moved around too much. Too many lights. Damn witch girl.”

You help Reimu to a nearby tree, so she can rest in the shade. When you set her against the tree, she immediately slumps down to the ground and lays back with her eyes shut. Whatever she pulled out of her ass for that final blow has obviously taken its toll on her. You turn to both Mori and Mima. “Is this normal?”

Mima strokes her ethereal chin, but quickly gives up thinking and grins. “I dunno. I’ve never seen her go all-out like that before. It was fun to watch, though!”

You cock an eyebrow at her. “Shouldn’t you be worried about Marisa?”

Mima stops, like she forgot. “Oh. Yeah. She might have overdosed on magic. I’ll go poke her to make sure she’s breathing.”

You would hope that she’s being so nonchalant about it because she’s just kidding around, but it’s Mima you’re talking to. Regardless, you leave her be so that you can address Reimu. “I thought you were going to kill her.”

Reimu doesn’t open her eyes. “I’m not going to kill someone just because I’m pissed off. She’s only one of Mima’s pawns — not worth becoming a murderer over.”

Her words dig at an old wound, but you ignore it and focus on your relief intead. You weren’t thrilled about having to stop Reimu after seeing everything she’s capable of. It seems like you may have overexaggerated her bloodlust, but she acts so hard-boiled that it’s difficult not to take her at her word when she declares her intent to kill somebody.

After you think for a bit, she speaks again. “The orbs she took. Where are they?”

You weren’t really keeping track of them after the fight broke out, so you have no idea. They’re probably on the ground some—

“Right here!” Mori calls out. She walked off for a bit, but now she’s returned with the two orbs in her hands. They’re smooth — polished, likely — but they’re completely blank and nondescript. If you’re understanding correctly, these are the powerful Yin Yang Orbs that helped seal Mima at the cost of Reimu’s parents lives, but now they look like a simple pair of ornaments.

Reimu opens her eyes and grows a tiny smile as Mori returns the orbs to her. “Thanks.”

Mori smiles back at her, but when she turns away you notice how her expression drops into a sad frown. Your partner has probably picked up on something you can’t, but bringing it up in front of Reimu isn’t a good idea.

Reimu cradles both of the orbs in her arms like children, and you see something resembling a content expression on her face. It’s such a fascinating and rare sight that you can’t help but ask, “Those orbs are important to you, aren’t they?”

She stares back at you a moment, and then sighs. “They’re a memento — and as long as they’re around, maybe there’s a bit of hope. Maybe.”

You glance at Mori, but she doesn’t meet your eyes. You decide not to press your luck by inquiring further.

“What are you going to do with that kid?” Reimu continues. “I may not want to kill her, but that doesn’t mean she should just walk away.”

“She may not look like it, but she’s probably your age,” you mention. “But I agree. I was going to bring her back to Kourindou. Maybe Morichika will do something about her if it’s reached this point.”

“Morichika? Is that the person who’s supposed to be looking out for her?”

You nod. “I don’t know what his relationship is with her exactly, but that secondhand store’s the closest thing to a home she has.”

Reimu scowls — not at you, for once. Then she stands up. “I’m going with you. I need to give this Morichika a piece of my mind.”

Before you can protest, Mima returns. “Marisa’s alright,” she reports. “She’ll probably be out for a bit, though. What are you—”

“We’re going to Kourindou,” Reimu says, “right after I put these orbs back.”

Mima smiles sheepishly. “Okay then! It doesn’t sound like you’ll need me, so I can stay back at the shrine and watch over—”

“I will stick you with so many talismans that you look like a mummy,” Reimu tells her, quickly silencing the ghost. “We’re all going to Kourindou and I’m going to fix all this dumb shit so I don’t have to deal with it any more.”

Sounds like there isn’t any room to argue. Just a few minutes ago Reimu was too dizzy to stand, and now she’s walking strong and delivering threats like it was nothing. Her fist is starting to bruise, but still she clenches it tightly. Once again, you’re glad you didn’t have to fight her. She’s tough.


After returning the Yin Yang Orbs to her shrine, Reimu marches you all back out of the woods, through the city, and to Kourindou. Once again, you find yourself hauling an unconscious Marisa on your back. Her smell is even worse than last time — and it’s mixed with plenty of dirt and fresh sweat. If the only thing that came out of all this was Marisa taking a bath, you’d still consider it a win.

Marisa eventually stirs as you enter the forest path leading to Kourindou. You feel her arms tighten around your neck, and then her groggy whisper in your ear. “Is that you again, PI?”

“Does anyone else carry you home like this?”

She lets out a small, raspy chuckle. “Nope. Not any more.”

It’s hard to muster much sympathy for her. “That sounds like it’s sad, but I’d be more worried about what’s coming up next, if I were you.”

Reimu who had been walking a bit ahead of you, stops and turns around. “Is she awake?”

Marisa grunts. “Ugh, the Hakurei.”

Reimu approaches, glaring at the witch hanging on your shoulders. “My name is Reimu, witch.”

Marisa returns her glare. “And my name’s Marisa, shrine maiden.”

“Lovely,” you remark dryly. “Now you’re both acquainted.”

Reimu looks at you, and then keeps moving. “Whatever. I’m settling this with Morichika, so she can wait until then.”

Marisa pulls herself up so she can yell over your shoulder. “Hey, don’t you be thinkin’ about causin’ trouble at Kourindou because of me. Kourin didn’t do anything!”

“That’s exactly my point,” Reimu replies. She leaves it at that for now and keeps walking.


Kourindou itself soon comes into view. You aren’t sure if Morichika actually sells anything or he just tosses it away after a period of time, but the “collectibles” gathered around the entrance have been changing every time you visit. You can’t imagine him getting that kind of traffic out here, but it wouldn’t be the strangest thing in Gensokyo.

Marisa groans and shifts down your back, like she’s trying to hide from the inevitable encounter. You don’t really blame her, but this has to happen one way or the other.

Reimu, in her usual fashion, makes no attempt at basic etiquette and throws open the door to Kourindou. “Hey! I need to speak to Morichika!”

Morichika, who had been behind the counter reading something like usual, is at first shocked and then surprisingly calm once he notices who just stormed in. “Ah, you’re Reimu? You’ve grown.”

That stops her instantly. “What? You know me?”

“Somewhat,” he answers, recalling something fondly. “Your parents were frequent customers.”

Reimu’s face reaches peak sourness. “Here? What use would they possibly have for any of this junk?”

If Morichika takes offense, his expression doesn’t show it. “Nevermind that. I’m assuming you aren’t a customer. What brings you here today, Miss Reimu?”

You step out from behind the shrinekeeper before she can be any less polite. “Morichika. I’ve brought Marisa.”

He groans. “Again, PI? Was she causing trouble at the shrine?”

Morichika’s able to put two and two together quick enough. Marisa remains silent. She might be trying to pretend that she’s unconscious, but you can tell she’s still awake by her swift, uneven breaths.

“She tried to kill me to avenge Mima,” Reimu answers for you. “You probably know the story there, right? Seems like Ace Detective here let it slip that Mima was looking for her, so she decided to make an act of aggression in order to be deemed worthy in her eyes — or something.”

Morichika’s glare is evident behind the lens of his glasses. “I should have known nothing good could come out of you asking about Mima. Why on earth did you think it would be a good idea to mention something like that to Marisa?”

Before you can offer a rebuttal, Reimu does it for you. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you not to shoot the messenger? What are you trying to do, pretend that part of her life didn’t happen? She was a crony for a wannabe evil overlord. You all need to get over it and move on, because it’s starting to affect me — again — and that pisses me off.”

Morichika rolls his eyes. “Listen, I’m happy to see you’ve adopted your mother’s method of problem-solving, but as far as I’m concerned you’re still just a chi—”

Reimu leans over the counter menacingly. “I don’t want to hear anything like that from someone so completely half-assed! You took in this girl, didn’t you? And you just watched her do all this dumb shit, because at least it took her mind off Mima? What right do you have to judge me because of my age?”

Morichika frowns, and you can see how his mouth is tight with frustration. “Her father entrusted her to me because she was too dangerous to keep in Central. She’s been completely out of control since Mima’s little cult was defeated.”

Reimu is undaunted. “I don’t give a shit about whatever dumbass reason her father had for getting rid of her. Don’t try and convince me that you’ve been doing her a favor by letting her grow up doing whatever she wants.”

Holy shit, she is really on the offensive. You can feel Marisa’s hands cringe and grab at your shirt. Her behavior and Morichika’s lack of guidance may not be acceptable, but even you think Reimu should ease up a little bit. “Hey Reimu,” you begin, “maybe—”

Your interjection only redirects her attention to you for a moment. “You just stand there with your weird little girl companion,” she tells you, “because your part is done.”

You give Mori a resigned look, she responds with a shrug, and then you both inch closer to the wall in case another fight breaks out. You’ve done all that could be expected out of you. Hopefully, there’s a point to Reimu being this aggressive.

Morichika is obviously struggling, and the short delay is all Reimu needs to keep going. “Frankly, I think people like Marisa’s father are disgusting — and so are you, if you’re the man I think you are. Only caring for someone when it’s convenient, and not when it’s difficult—”

“I—I do care about Marisa!” Morichika suddenly argues back. “That’s why I’ve always provided her a safe haven whenever—”

“That’s not being a responsible caretaker,” Reimu declares, “that’s being an accomplice!”

“Stop it!” Marisa’s yell blasts your ear drum. “PI, lemme down.”

After so long, you had almost forgotten her weight. Instead of simply dropping her, this time you care enough to squat down and let her off gently so she can say her piece.

Her steps are far from stable — she must not have the kind of recovery speed Reimu does — but she manages to wobble her way closer to Morichika and Reimu before she speaks. “Kourin ain’t as negligent as you’re makin’ him out to be! He never wanted me to do any of this. He tried to help me, but I wouldn’t let him! I’ve done a lot of bad stuff, and I’ll prolly keep doin’ bad stuff, but don’t blame Kourin for it!”

Morichika sinks into his chair. “Marisa, it’s alright. I know I haven’t done right by you.” Then he laughs dryly. “I never thought I would have a child to care for. I’m only half-human — sterile, as it were. I didn’t expect—”

Reimu sighs loudly. “Stop. I don’t need your origin story. I just want you to realize what a fuck-up you’ve been so I don’t feel like I’m letting you off easy when I fix it for you.”

Marisa eyes Reimu — half-wary, yet half-desperate. “How do ya think you can possibly fix this?”

“Just like any problem is fixed,” she replies, “by going to the source.” Then she calls out, “Mima! Stop hiding back there and come out!”

Mima slips through the wall behind Morichika, looking bored as she drifts over him. “Reimu, you could really use a bit of flair when it comes to solving these sorts of ‘incidents.’”

When Morichika looks up, he jolts out of his chair and nearly falls to the ground. Marisa, on the other hand, is looking around madly. “Mima? What are you talkin’ about? Even if she were here, why would she be takin’ orders from you?”

Reimu sighs. “I probably should have made it clear from the beginning. I’m the one who unsealed Mima, so we made a deal: she works for me, and I don’t seal her back up.”

Morichika, having collected himself, is astonished by Reimu’s admission. “You unsealed her? And you let her wander about? And you brought her here?”

Mima looks down at Morichika and smirks. “My, the fear on your face is simply nostalgic. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a look like that.”

Reimu walks behind Marisa, and points her face in the direction of Mima’s floating spirit. “See? Mima’s floating right in front of you. Stop being deluded and see what she really is!”

“I—I see somethin’,” Marisa says, “but this blob of a ghost is supposed to be Lady Mima?”

Mima gasps in offense, but Reimu has plenty more to add. “That’s right. She’s hopelessly lazy, complains all the time that she can’t eat junk food, attempts to seduce anyone who will have a word with her, frequently steals my underwear, and has a habit of animating the body parts of youkai victims to tell a joke!”

Each phrase seems to wound Mima. “I—I thought you liked my improvised puppet shows!” she retorts.

Marisa, on the other hand, is completely downtrodden. “You’re tellin’ me the Lady Mima I used to worship is nothin’ more than a dirty old lady who just goofs off all the time? I felt awful for all these years because I couldn’t get any better at magic, so I started eating mushrooms and recording their effects so I could help somehow. I got into fights with youkai and demons so I could see their spells and record them. I’ve been trying so hard for her eventual return, and it was all for nothin’?”

To your surprise, Mima smiles and floats down to the ragged witch. “All the others moved on,” she tells her, “except for you. I truly appreciate that, Marisa.” Then she frowns. “However, I never gave a damn about you. All I wanted was a a nice lackey, but it’s become clear to me that you’re a terrible servant. You’d be better off practicing magic on your own.”

Tears come to Marisa’s eyes, as she begins to see. “You, you can’t—”

“Follow your own path, or let all I taught you be for nothing,” Mima tells her former student. “Either way, I release you from my service. Never seek me again.”

Marisa falls silent and hides her face by casting her gaze downward. Then she runs past the counter and into the back rooms of Kourindou. Nobody pursues her, and all of you remain uncomfortably quiet for a few moments.

“She used a lot of energy when she was fighting Reimu,” Mima suddenly explains to a still-stunned Morichika. “If she passes out now, she’ll be asleep for a couple of days. Make sure she gets some food beforehand — and a nice bath.”

Mori steps forward. “Hey uh, I’m just one weird little girl companion talking here, but I think I should help her out since I’m the least connected to all this drama.” She turns to Morichika. “You got a bath, right?”

It takes a moment for Morichika to nod. “It’s old-fashioned, but yes.”

Mori grows a wide smile. “Ooh, that’ll be nice. I haven’t used one of those since… uh, I was an even littler kid.”

You notice how she caught herself, and you grimace at her. She grins back sheepishly, and then follows Marisa. That leaves you, a very exasperated Reimu, a smug-looking Mima, and a Morichika who looks like he’s still processing everything that’s happened.

Before another uncomfortable silence sets in, you say something. “That was some good acting, Mima.”

Mima brushes her hair back with her hand and avoids your eyes. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Bullshit,” you press on. “You care about Reimu and Marisa. It’s just that one needs you at her side, and the other one needs you as far away as possible.”

Reimu scowls in your direction. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

You smile back at her. “Just some idle deductions from the ‘Ace Detective.’”

If she were any less exhausted from the day’s events, she would probably hit you. Instead, she quietly simmers.

Morichika finally lets out a long sigh. “You’re all absolutely insane, but I’m somehow feeling a bit more confident Marisa might make better decisions from now on, and I owe you all thanks for that.”

“I don’t want any of the junk here,” Reimu says, unaware of Morichika’s under-the-counter specials.

On the other hand, you’re never not in need of more ammunition. “I could always use some store credit.”

Morichika hesitates. “How about some tea, to start with?”

Reimu leans on the counter like she was ordering from a bar. “I’ll take the best stuff you have, then.”

Tea was what caused this mess in the first place, so you’re a little shy of it. “If it’s all the same, I’d rather have some sake.”

Reimu licks her lips. “Actually, I’ll have what he’s having.”


Several minutes later you’re in one of the less-cramped back rooms of Kourindou, sitting at a kotatsu with Reimu and Mima. It’s an old one — with a charcoal flame underneath instead of an electric heater — but you’re sure it’s plenty comfortable enough in the winter time. For now though, it’s not cold enough to light.

Morichika appears with a bottle of sake and some cups. “I keep this hidden from Marisa. I don’t often drink, so have as much as you like.”

Reimu doesn’t hesitate to grab a cup, but you do. “Aren’t you joining us?”

Morichika shakes his head with a resigned look. “Despite everything that’s happened today, I do still have a shop to run.”

With that, he returns to the front. Reimu takes a a surprisingly quaint sip of her sake, while Mima doesn’t hesitate to drain her entire—

Wait, what?”

Mima meets your gaze slyly with her green eyes. “Something wrong, PI? Never seen a ghost drink before?”

“You have got to be kidding me. Isn’t that just a waste?”

“Sake is just as spiritual as it is physical,” she argues.

Unwilling to debate metaphysics, you grab your cup and the bottle. However, before you pour, you can’t help but think:

[] You should bring some sake to Morichika up front. Just because he’s still working doesn’t mean he can’t have a drink.

[] You should check up on Mori and Marisa. They might need some help with the bath.

[] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

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[x] You should bring some sake to Morichika up front. Just because he’s still working doesn’t mean he can’t have a drink.

Dude had a hard day.
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[X] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

PI had a hard day.
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[x] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.
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[x] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

If only delusion could be cured so readily in real life.
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[x] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

Voting this mainly to see how things inevitably do go wrong.
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[X] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.
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[X] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.
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[X] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

This is important. I feel it in my bones.
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[X] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

The "peep on Mori and Marissa" option sings to me, but I'll not be tempted so easily.
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[x] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

A perverted ghost ara getting drunk? Totally nothing lewd going to happen here.
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I'm going to call it for Reimu and Mima by quite a large margin.

I assure you that the next update will be completely appropriate for all ages. :^)
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[x] Just pour the sake and drink with Reimu and Mima. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

After some very brief consideration, you decide that Mori won’t need any help taking care of Marisa. If you went to check up on them, she would certainly tease you somehow — especially after what happened the last time a bath was involved.

So instead, you pour yourself a cup of sake — which would normally be very rude. However, you aren’t so hung up on customs that you’re going to adhere to them when your fellow drinkers certainly aren’t. In fact, Mima swipes the bottle as soon as you set it down and pours herself another, having gulped the first down already.

Judging by the clarity of the liquid and its flowery smell, this is some pretty nice sake. Unfortunately, you never were the type to savor your poison, so you take a hearty swig as if it were the swill they sell at the convenience store in big, cheap bottles. The heavy, dry taste that lingers on your tongue confirms your assumptions of this sake’s fine quality.

Then your mind turns to conversation. Honestly, you could do without prying into Reimu’s background or asking her more about her powers and the shrine. You’ve seen it firsthand, and that’s all you really need. Instead, your eyes flicker to Mima, who watches you while you drink. When your eyes meet, she smiles. “Is something the matter, PI? You’re staring at us awfully harshly.”

Mima seems playful enough — which is fine as long as she stays on the other side of the table. “That’s just how my face is,” you say. “I want to ask about my compensation. Didn’t you say something about a magic mirror?”

She giggles. “Oh, yes. A mirror that can solve a man’s woman problems instantly — that’s what you wanted, right?”

“That’s what you offered,” you clarify. “I honestly have no idea what to expect, and I’m curious as to what it really is since I’m not getting any money.”

Reimu snorts in a distinctly unfeminine manner. “If you wanted some kind of payout, then you messed up by getting involved with us.”

You can see a flush growing on her cheeks, and she hasn’t even finished her first cup. It strikes you as odd that Reimu would be weak to alcohol, but then you consider the fact that she’s a slim girl and probably doesn’t get to drink alcohol that much — not good sake like this, anyway.

“I’m fine with whatever cursed item Mima has for me,” you tell Reimu. “I just want something to show for this.”

Mima chuckles. “Cursed? Must you automatically assume anything I have to offer is some too-good-to-be-true trinket that I hand out, only so I may enjoy watching the consequences of its use? Do I remind you so much of some demon or devil from a storybook?”

“Yes,” you and Reimu answer at the same time.

Mima crosses her arms and pouts dramatically. “Fine then. I can’t give it to you now, though.”

You eye her warily. “Why not?”

“It’s not some mirror you could carry about so carelessly,” Mima explains. “You have a home, don’t you?”

“An apartment,” you answer. “How big is this mirror?”

“Well, it’s really more of a disc than a—” she starts to explain, but quickly gives up. “It’s best you see it for yourself. I’ll bring it to you tomorrow.”

Her eagerness to deliver it does nothing to relieve your suspicions, but you know it would be pointless to voice them at this point. “I’ll be looking forward to it, then.”


Mima continues making short work of whatever she pours herself, but she slows down considerably after a few cups. You’re almost finished with your second, but Reimu’s pretty quiet after only downing one. Mima drives the majority of the inane topics of conversation, such as which type of youkai you would choose to have sex with — you safely answered that hatefucking a tengu might be enjoyable, Mima recounted a sultry tale about a flower youkai in full-bloom from “a long time ago”, and Reimu finally mumbled something about a dream she had of a giant oni but refused to divulge any further. Normally the subject of sex with youkai would depress you, on account of your past, but the alcohol does a good job of washing away the self-pity and keeping you in better humors.

You feel a grin on your face as you watch Mima sip her cup of sake. It’s really perplexing that a ghost would even drink sake when they don’t have a proper body in the first place. You can’t tell if it’s having any effect on her or not. Eventually, you have to say something. “Where does all that sake go, anyway?”

Mima cocks an eyebrow at you. “My dear PI, are you inquiring about a lady’s innards? That’s terribly crass.”

After that last conversation, nothing is too crass. “You’re a ghost before you are a lady,” you respond.

Reimu chuckles at that one.

Mima puts her hands on what passes for her hips and huffs. “Really, now! I wonder if you know how hurtful you can be sometimes.”

You laugh. “I’m sorry. If it makes any difference, you would be a beautiful woman if you were still alive.”

That isn’t simple flattery, either. The porportion of her torso and her spectral tail leads you to believe she had a tall, voluptuous figure made even more seductive by the dark mystique in her green eyes. Of course, you’re also looking through the filter of what was apparently some very potent sake — not to mention, strong ghosts like Mima can choose to take on the appearance they fancied most in their life. She could have been a tiny, shriveled old hag when she actually croaked.

Mima giggles in an overtly-feminine manner. “Oh PI, and you call me a tease!” Then a mischievous shadow falls over her face. “If you’re so curious about where my sake goes, how would you like to experience it for yourself?”

The smile falls right off your face. “What?”

With a sinister grin, the ghost snakes over the table, and stops right in front of you. The same chilling sensation you felt earlier today when you reached into her bosom to pull out your gun covers your entire lower body as her ghostly tail “settles” in your lap. “Lay down,” she commands.

At first you don’t think you’re drunk enough for this shit, but all of a sudden your back is on the floor and your eyes are on the ceiling — where you can spot more cobwebs than you’d like. It doesn’t surprise you that Morichika is behind on his cleaning.

“Just open your mouth and relax,” she assures you. “Everything will be fine.”

You highly doubt that, but somehow your mouth opens. All you can do is watch as Mima floats over you, and then descends on your face. The cold mist of her lower body envelops your entire vision in a dense fog. Then your eyes can make out a shimmering light that seems less ethereal than the rest of her body. As the cold, biting air forces you to shut your eyes, your mouth is assaulted by a stream of ice-cold liquid. As your mouth fills, you begin to swallow the slightly bitter drink one gulp at a time. Your throat feels nearly frozen from the cold, but the drink itself goes down smooth. It isn’t until the deluge stops that you feel the distinct burning of alcohol and lingering dryness of the sake. As you gasp for breath, the realization finally hits you.

Mima just made you drink her sake right out of her body.

The fog dissipates, and both warmth and control return to your body. You sit up and gape at Mima, dumbfounded. “Did you just piss—“

She giggles madly. “I can’t urinate, I’m a ghost! Think of it as guzzling down some sake straight from the icebox.”

It’s hard to write it off so casually when it came out of Mima’s “box”. You imagine this was her plan along; the ruse of drinking sake was all so she could get some devious thrill from pouring it all down your throat in such an intimate manner. What a deplorable ghost. “Reimu,” you say, “could you do something about her?”

The tipsy shrinekeeper is staring at you and Mima in horror — like something out of her worst nightmare. Then she reaches for the sake bottle. “I’m gonna drink enough sake to forget I witnessed that.”

“That’s probably a good idea,” someone remarks. You turn and see that Mori has sauntered into the room, presumably finished tending to Marisa. “I had no idea what to expect from you three drinking together, but it certainly wasn’t that.”

“Mori!” you call to her, since she seems so far away all of a sudden. “It’s not like that. She said it wasn’t piss! It was like drinking straight from the, uh, ice cup.”

She grimaces. “I’m sure it was.”

“How’s the kid?” Reimu mentions, in a rare expression of concern for another.

Mori smiles. “I washed her down, fed her some sweets, and sent her to bed. We talked a little, and I think she’s going to be fine.”

As you listen, the alcohol starts working its way through your blood. Your whole body is warm, and it’s hard to tell whether your head is too light or too heavy. It’s so bad that you have to keep your hands gripped to the kotatsu table to keep from falling over. The nausea is starting to kick in.

Mori puts her hand on your head and crouches down next to you. “You alright, PI?”

Mima slowly floats back to her original spot with a smirk. “He drank over half a bottle of oni sake in about an hour and a half. It won’t be long before his mind’s gone for the rest of the evening.”

Mori frowns at her. “You knew it was oni sake and you still made him drink so much of it? That’s going too far.”

Mima shrugs. “He was curious.”

You want to assure Mori you’ll be fine, so you put your arm on her shoulder — except you’re still really dizzy. It ends up around her shoulders instead, and when you try to keep yourself from falling over, you pull her in close. Your head ends up resting on hers, and that familiar, flower-like smell makes you smile and reminds you of happy times, like you and Mori cooking for each other, or sleeping together, or bathing together or—

Huh. Only Mori comes to your mind at the moment. That’s okay; it’s probably because you’re drunk. “Everythin’s fine,” you inform her. “I’m fine.”

Mori reaches around your back so you’re both holding each other up. The room is getting kind of blurry, but her smile is clear. “Don’t worry,” she tells you. “I know.”

You hear Reimu groan. “I already feel sick,” she whines. “That bastard should have warned us if the sake’s this strong.”

“It was free,” you want to argue, but the words don’t find their way out of your throat.

Mima sighs at Reimu. “You should really be better at handling your alcohol. PI here is a shining example of what you should aspire to. After all that, he hasn’t even vomited!”

“Please don’t give him any ideas,” Mori replies quickly.


It feels like every bit of your body aches as your consciousness returns. The room is dark, but not so much that you don’t recognize it as your own bedroom. However, instead of waking up on your bed, it appears that you slept in the doorway of the bathroom — your head and torso on the dirty carpet, and the rest of you on the cold tile.

Slowly, you lift yourself from the ground with your arms and sit against the door. The taste on your tongue is dry and rotten, while your bones creak and hurt with every movement — most of all your neck, which will likely be twisted up all day. A burning feeling tears at your chest, and you can’t tell if it’s heartburn, acid reflux, or both. Of course, your throbbing headache is the whipped cream and cherry on top of your hangover pains.

The most immediate concern is the hot pressure in your pelvis, which you eventually rise and attend to. Flipping on the switch and shutting the door, it occurs to you that your bathroom is a little too clean. Given the condition you were in last night and where you woke up, it would be a good guess that you made some kind of mess and Mori cleaned it. A sense of guilt accompanies you to the toilet, where you swiftly relieve yourself — and make sure you clean up afterward.

The mirror above your sink assures you that you look just as bad as you feel. The dark circles around your bloodshot eyes sag even lower than usual and exaggerate the clamminess of your skin and the uneven shadow of your facial hair. Splashing some warm water on your face gives you a bit of color back, but not much else.

After popping open the medicine cabinet and chasing some aspirin with some sink water drank from your hand, you open the door and stumble back into your bedroom. You have no idea what time it is, but it must still be early in the morning if it’s dark. A giant mass of blankets in the center of your bed means that Mori must have wrapped herself into one of her cocoons.

So be it. You’d rather stay awake, anyway.

In the living room, you turn the television on at a low volume just so there’s some kind of light and noise in the room. Your laptop is still where you left it. Taking a shower can wait until you’re feeling a little more energetic.

The first thing you notice when you boot your laptop is that it’s 4:12 — pretty damn early. If antyhing, it’ll be nice to have some quiet alone-time before Mori gets out of bed.

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice the conspicuous box of tissues you keep on the table.

A month ago, you were masturbating on your couch. Now you’re masturbating on your couch with a goddess sleeping in the next room. Somehow it’s all so different, yet still the same.


After creeping to and from the bathroom to dispose of the remnants, you sit back down on your couch with your laptop. You’re still hungover as shit, but you feel a bit lighter.

The first thing you do is sign back into KRC and check in on #kakashi. However, to your surprise, nobody else is online. You figure at least Hatate would be on, but you suppose even she has to sleep sometime. It is awfully quiet on the other side of the wall.

You leave KRC open regardless and instead, for no particular reason, decide to open Kappanet Explorer and navigate to your kmail inbox — after some significant load times, of course.

Thankfully, the kmail client automatically sorts the ridiculous amount of junk mail you somehow receive everyday — you’ve long suspected Hatate registers at less-than-reputable sites using your email. Unfortunately, the junk filter only catches maybe half. As you mindlessly read through the spam and chuckle to yourself about the ridiculous offers — free penis enlargement pills from Eientei, leaked nudes of Aya Shameimaru, lonely women in your area — one email in particular stands out:



To: gensokyopi@kmail.com
From: kkamishirasawa@gensokyo.edu

I was thinking that I should send you something first to make sure you didn’t forget my email address. You never were very good at remembering things like that.

But then I started thinking too much, and came up with the foolish idea to write some more. Maybe I have some misguided urge to reclaim my role as your doting friend. Maybe I like to ramble. It’s likely both.

Every day since you’ve left has been the same routine. It’s not a cycle I particularly dislike, but it’s one that has always felt out-of-place. I always wanted to move beyond it, yet I never could. I’ve come to genuinely enjoy the company of the children, but no matter how I much I earn their favor there will always be a distance that I can’t close.

I don’t want to be selfish, though. How have your adventures been? The life of a private investigator must be leagues more entertaining than a suburban schoolteacher. Nothing says that more than your association with Reimu. She attracts nothing but trouble, as is her destiny.

Then there’s that impish girl of yours — that Mori. I do hope you’re taking proper care of her. Even if the circumstances are muddled, you have to be a proper guardian for her. If she acts up then you have to scold her and then work with her so she can grow. I worry about how you handle children. You never seemed to like them much when we were younger.

There’s some people of my own I’ve been caring for, but if I kept writing I fear this email would become a novel. Please write back when you can. I often stay late in my office, so I have plenty of access to this computer.



Oh, boy. She must have wrote this as soon as she finished with her classes yesterday. You can’t say you’re surprised — she was always very prompt about correspondence. The email itself is fairly unsurprising; it’s a mix of henpecking and general anxiety of her own circumstances and others’. In other words, it's very Keine.

[] Respond briefly and politely.

[] Engage her and tell her about the fight between Reimu and Marisa.

[] Ignore the email completely.
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[X] Engage her and tell her about the fight between Reimu and Marisa.

No reason to be rude.
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[x] Engage her and tell her about the fight between Reimu and Marisa.

No need to push her away that hard. And at least this keeps the topic away from PI himself.
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[x] Respond briefly and politely.

I think it's still too early to fully accept Keine back into our life. Let's keep things as vague and short as possible to rebuild that trust.
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[x] Engage her and tell her about the fight between Reimu and Marisa.

Gotta tell someone about the main character showdown.
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[x] Ignore the email completely.
I'm not interested.
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[x] Ignore the email completely.
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[] Respond briefly and politely.

Excuse me may I ask when we can see Hina again? She wasn't appeared a long time.
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>That entire Mima scene

Here I thought I was going to be coming out of that update with a boner

[x] Engage her and tell her about the fight between Reimu and Marisa.
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[x] Engage her and tell her about the fight between Reimu and Marisa.
[x] Check out Aya nudes.
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Sooner than you might think, Hinanon.

You monster. I only wrote that to raise awareness of the danger of ghost watersports, not for some pseudo-sexual thrill. How dare you.

I now have an idea for another post in Off the Record. Thank you.
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>Sooner than you might think, Hinanon.

So, uh, did he think 2018 or...
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b-baka pi-kun
[x] Engage her and tell her about the fight between Reimu and Marisa.


Re: Hello

To: kkamishirasawa@gensokyo.edu
From: gensokyopi@kmail.com

I can remember something as simple as an email address just fine. I think what you meant to say was “you’re probably going to ignore me, so here’s a reminder that my foot is irrevocably jammed in the doorway of your life.”

You should stop thinking of life as a routine. Your choices determine the life you lead, not some set of rules and traditions. You always had problems with being bound to conformity. See? I can say shit like that too.

My adventures take me all over the place. And yes, I do walk. You may have noticed, but my calves are like tree trunks. I run into youkai here and there. Some of them are okay, and others are not.


You pause and stare at what you’ve typed already. She would freak out if you mentioned being attacked by a tengu and an insect youkai, so instead you type a few paragraphs explaining what happened between Reimu and Marisa yesterday and the context behind it — making sure to strike a balance between embellishing the action and assuring Keine you were in no real danger. She’ll probably find something like that interesting, and she can worry about Reimu’s safety instead of yours. Perfect.

Then an idea comes to you: if Keine knows all of Gensokyo’s history, then wouldn’t she know who Mima is — or was, rather? You haven’t really heard from an unbiased source yet, and you can admit to yourself that you’re a little curious about the ghost.


I might as well ask for a favor now that I’ve gone this far. Who was Mima? Surely that isn’t too much to ask of an accomplished historian like yourself. There should be some kind of record about a magician like that being in Gensokyo.

I understand I might have to wait for the full moon, whenever that is. I stopped paying attention to the cycles a long time ago. It’s easier if I just don’t think about it. Unfortunately, you don’t really have that luxury.



It’s best to stop there; a few bubbles of sentiment are rising to the surface. This should be more than enough to satisfy Keine’s curiosity for now. You send the email out and then stare at the factory-default KappaOS desktop background. Since you have nothing else to do, you might as well update your files. So, you navigate to the folder in the file browser and—

Nothing. Okay, the file browser must be stuck or something. You right-click and refresh — still nothing. You close the file browser and reopen it. You close the the lid of the laptop and reopen it. You smash the power button and reboot the computer. Once it finally starts back up, you open the file browser again.

Only one file is in the folder, and the filename is glitched out. When you click on it, a blank document opens. Your heart sinks. You close the file and try to delete it, but it stays in that folder no matter what you do to it.

You clench your fists tightly and resist the urge to smash the computer against the wall. Instead, you cry out: “What the fuck is this shit?”

“Good morning to you too,” Mori greets you wearily. She’s emerged from your bedroom, wearing the same bright pajamas from the other day that are too small for her. Rubbing her eyes, she sits down on the couch and leans her messy blonde head on your shoulder. “What’s goin’ on?”

You gesture furiously at the computer screen, which displays the mostly-empty folder. “That’s what’s going on. This stupid damn thing glitched out and I lost all my files. All that’s left is some trash file that I can’t even delete.”

Mori looks at the computer, blinks a few times, and then looks back at you. “That sucks. Do you want a blessing or something?”

“You’re an earth and metal goddess. Are computers even in your domain?”

She smiles. “Not really, but I can give you hug and call you ‘Big Brother’ for the day.”

You sigh. “I’ll pass on the hug, thanks.”

“But you wouldn’t mind if I called you Big Brother?”

You’re a little old to be her big brother, but it’s better than “papa” or “uncle.” Both of those would have some pretty seedy implications, but maybe that’s because of the material you were using earlier to take care of your business.

She leans into you harder. “Well?”

You find it difficult to keep looking her in the eye. “If that’s what you want to do. Aren’t I technically the younger brother, though?”

“Nah,” Mori replies, “I wanna be the little sister.”

“You mean you want to act cute and spoiled instead of even pretending to be responsible or considerate.”

She lightly knocks on her head with her knuckle and grins stupidly. “I dunno what you’re talkin’ about, Big Brother.”

Putting aside the dumb act, you do feel a little better. “Big Brother” does have a pleasant ring to it, and you always were a bit jealous of the older brothers of the world — being an only child.

“But y’know, it’s a little odd that a computer would glitch out and only delete those files,” Mori continues, more seriously. “I don’t know much about computers, but I used one in the Outside World. Are you sure nothing else is wrong with it?”

Mori’s right: it is odd. You scroll through various other files and see that nothing else is wrong. There are no other errors or oddities that you can see. Doesn’t that make this little glitch awfully specific — and a coincidence? Hatate gets into your files, and they get mysteriously deleted not long after?

Maybe filling in the gaping hole the booze made in your memory will provide an answer. “What happened last night, after I drank all that sake?”

“Oh yeah,” Mori replies, “you definitely would’ve blacked out after all that. Alright, Mima drank most of a bottle of sake and then made you drink it by—”

You cringe, and your pretty sure she said that just to see you do so. “I remember that. I’m talking about after.”

Mori thinks. “Well, you were pretty mentally vacant after the alcohol set in. Oni sake will do that to you. Mima started talking about sex and how long it’s been since she had it, and gradually crept into the topic of possessing either me, Reimu, or Marisa to um, seduce you.”

Not that there would’ve been much need to seduce you in that state, no matter who she possessed. “Lovely,” you grumble. “We should make a note never to invite Mima when there’s alcohol involved.”

“Agreed,” Mori replies quickly, before continuing. “So, naturally Reimu got real pissed off at Mima for that and tried planting some seals on her, and it turned into a bit of a scuffle. When Morichika came back to see what all the ruckus was, I slipped us both out of there and we walked home.”

“I could walk?”

She giggles. “I kinda had to lead you along, y’know. Reminded me of how we first met.”

“Maybe I need to quit the bottle,” you suggest halfheartedly.

“No, no!” she cries, pulling on your sleeve. “It wasn’t your fault. You can’t quit because of that. I still want to drink together with you, Big Brother!”

This may have been a mistake. Even if it’s Mori, a cute girl calling you that is dangerous. It takes all your energy not to rub her head. “Fine, fine,” you say to placate her. “I’ll still drink with you, don’t worry.”

Mori breathes a sigh of relief. “Good.”

Quickly, you need to get back to the recap. “So how about when we made it home? What did I do?”

“I was pretty impressed,” she continues. “You made it all the way home without puking, but as soon as I unlocked the door you ran to the bathroom. You almost made it to the toilet, too.”

You grimace. “Sorry about that.”

She waves your apology off. “It happens. And I told you already — it wasn’t your fault. So, I cleaned up and you stayed in the bathroom for a while. I changed into my pajamas and laid down on the bed. Eventually you came out and said you would sleep on the couch, which I kind of agreed with, since I didn’t want you to puke in the covers and you reeked of booze. That’s all I saw. For all I know, you were asleep on the couch until now.”

“I woke up in the bathroom,” you mention. “I must have had to puke again or piss or something, and ended up laying down on the floor and falling asleep.” That part isn’t so suspicious, since laying down wherever is just something you do when you’re wasted. “Are you sure that nobody else came into the apartment?”

Mori frowns and thinks. “I guess I could’ve slept through someone breaking into the living room, but would someone really break in so skillfully just to delete some files off your computer and then leave? Even for Gensokyo, it sounds farfetched. Maybe you tried to use your laptop when you were drunk and accidentally screwed up the files?”

You shake your head. “Even if I was shitfaced, there’s no way I would do that. The copies the system backs up once in a while aren’t even there. Even if I was so thorough, it doesn’t explain the corrupted file that’s there now.”

Mori scratches her head. “Huh. Maybe it was hacked?”

“Wouldn’t it be impossible to get into the computer’s files if it’s not on?”

She shrugs. “Like I said, I don’t know the complex stuff.”

“I don’t either. But, I know someone who does.”

Hatate is either responsible for this or knows how to find out who is, so you grab the laptop, put on some slippers, and walk next door.


After knocking three times, Hatate finally opens the door wearing a dark scowl and little else — just a loose t-shirt and some plain white panties that look like the kind you can buy at a Kappa Mart for cheap. You try not to look at her pale, slender legs and mostly succeed.

“What the fuck do you want?” she demands.

You present to her your laptop. “I think I got hacked.”

She stares at the computer a moment, before letting out a dry chuckle. “Too bad. You shouldn’t have clicked the pop-up ads on whatever porn site you were jerking off to.”

Hatate moves to slam the door in your face, but you push your way into her apartment. Mori, still in her pajamas, follows you in.

In the very short time Hatate has lived here, she’s already turned it into a fucking disaster. Even if you ignore the many boxes she has yet to unpack, the floor is littered with clothes and the remnants of food she’s had delivered. Hatate’s musk and stale pizza permeate the very air itself. Her bed is the only significant piece of furniture, besides a cheap-looking desk and chair. All in all, it really doesn’t surprise you.

Hatate groans and sits down on her bed. “Why are you waking me up for this shit? It’s your problem.”

“Only my files were targeted,” you inform her. “That means information on you, Mori, and everyone else in Kakashi. Or maybe, you had something to do with that?”

Hatate jolts up from her bed. “What? Why would I want to get into your files? I already saw them. If I wanted to delete them, I would’ve done it then.”

That’s a good point. It doesn’t mean you’re certain she’s innocent, but it’s enough for you to move on to other possibilities. “Then what could’ve happened?”

Hatate swipes your laptop from you, opens it up, and starts clicking around. “I don’t know, but I’ll find out and make whatever it is regret messing with Kakashi.”

Now she’s hyper-motivated, since it involves her. Typical.

“Is there any way to get the files back?” Mori speaks up. “It seemed like they were completely wiped.”

“They were,” Hatate confirms. “In fact, I can’t even tell if you were hacked at all. This seems like a corruption in the file system, but it’s too specific. In any case, there’s no way to get your documents back.”

Damn it. You knew you should have kept physical back-ups. So much for the new age of technology. “What about that file that was left?” you mention. “I couldn’t even look at it.”

Hatate pops her neck and cracks her knuckles. “Lemme run some programs. It’s not just a blank document, so there’s probably something in it somewhere.”

“Do you want me to leave it with you for today?” you offer, eager to let her do whatever she needs to on her own. You’d like to get out of this messy apartment so you can get back to your own messy apartment and vent your frustrations privately.

“Yeah yeah,” Hatate answers, still focused on the screen in front of her. “Whatever.”

That sounds like your cue to leave, but before you can make it to the door, Hatate speaks up again. “Check the box by the door.”

It’s hard to tell which box she’s talking about, but Mori picks up a small box that Hatate’s already opened. Mori peeks inside, and her eyes start sparkling.

Now you’re curious. “What is it?”

Mori pulls out two cell phones that look awfully high-tech: they have large screens and an entire keyboard built into them — almost like a tiny computer. “Wow!” she cries. “These look expensive! I never saw any phones like this, even in the Outside World.”

“They’re for the two of you,” Hatate says, still hiding her face behind the screen. “Now you can stay in touch with all of us wherever you’re at in Gensokyo.”

While Mori ogles the new phones, you question Hatate. “All of us?”

“All of Kakashi,” Hatate clarifies. “Everyone’s number is in it: me, Q, Lucy, and even Hina.”

You find the image of Hina using a cell phone like this hard to swallow. “Hina has a cell phone?”

“It’s an older model, so she doesn’t get confused,” Hatate explains. “Those two phones, however, are the latest model from the kappa. It has a camera, music, and even a KRC client. It’s embarrassing for you not to have one, really.”

You’re sure if you pulled that laptop back, Hatate’s face would be blushing completely red. However, out of gratitude, you’ll refrain from doing so. “Thanks, Hatate. You’re acting like a proper boss for once.”

“You didn’t need to add that,” she grumbles. “It’s not a gift or anything; it’s an important tool for work!”

You grin at her. “Should I take these phones as an apology, then? For snooping around me and Mori so much?”

She tilts the laptop screen down just enough to where you can see her dead little bird eyes. “Don’t push it. I still hate you, but you’re a part of Kakashi Spirit News.” Then she avoids your eyes. “That means I hate you a little bit less than everyone else.”

Mori watches Hatate with an amusement equal to your own. “That’s really sweet of you Hatate. We hate you a little less than everyone else, too.”

Hatate dips down a little lower so her face is once again shielded by the laptop.

After giggling to herself, Mori presents both of the phones to you. One is blue, and the other is red, but besides that they’re identical. “Which one do you want, Big Brother?”

You don’t really mind, but you recall that Mori has an inclination towards blue — because of the clothes she was wearing when she first showed up at your apartment. She’s also gripping the blue phone tighter. “I’ll take the red phone,” you tell her, like a proper big brother.

Mori hands you the red phone with a smile. “Awesome! I get the blue phone, then.”

The phone looks cool, but it feels a bit fragile in your hand. You wonder if it’ll last long in your possession, given your often-dangerous line of work.

“Big Brother, huh,” Hatate mumbles. “Just get out already, normalfags. I’ll call you when I know what’s wrong with your stupid computer.”


Back at your apartment, you sit down on the couch and heave a sigh. “It’s only eight in the morning and I feel exhausted. Fucking computer.”

Mori remains standing, still investigating her new toy. “We got these cool phones for it, though! In fact, you should see this all as an opportunity, y’know? Why don’t we rewrite the files together? That way they would be more complete, right?”

“I guess.” Then you hang your head. “You sound a little too optimistic about all this, Mori.”

Catching your implication, she puts her hands on her hips and stares you down. “You think I deleted your files? You don’t trust me anymore, Big Brother?”

When she approaches, you raise your head to reveal your devious smirk. “Just kidding. I trust you with my life. You might even say I have faith in you.”

Mori holds herself and shivers with a steamy grin. “Oooh,” she moans. “You have no idea what that kind of declaration does for a god. Don’t joke around about that, Big Brother.”

You’re getting an erection from being called “Big Brother” by an aroused goddess that looks young enough to be your daughter, so it’s time to stop. “Speaking of faith,” you mention quickly, “I want to help Shizuha today.”

Thankfully, that’s enough to switch the topic instantly. Mori beams a triumphant smile at you. “Alright, it’s about time!” she declares. “So, what awesome plan have you come up with to get Shizuha her own followers?”

Your face stops and your mind starts racing. As it turns out, you haven’t really thought at all about Shizuha’s predicament. “The last time we spoke about it, we were thinking that Shizuha would protect humans from youkai while advertising for Minoriko’s harvest festival, where she would perform using her control over falling leaves.”

Mori nods along with you. “Yeah, yeah. We just didn’t know how exactly that was going to work out. We needed details. So, what have you thought up?”

You smile sheepishly. “I was thinking we should ask someone who might know more about the gods that used to dwell in Gensokyo. That way we could get some more ideas.”

Mori crosses her arms. “Why do we need more ideas? Beating up youkai for humans is a tried and true method. It’s how I became a big enough goddess to have my own nation, y’know.”

“This isn’t the Outside World though,” you argue. “We need to talk to someone with some deep knowledge of the gods of Gensokyo, so we can get an idea of how they gathered faith here.”

Mori doesn’t look satisfied, but she’s goes along with it anyway. “Alright, so who did you have in mind, exactly? Who’s going to have all this knowledge of the gods in Gensokyo, when the humans have stopped believing in them?”

There’s one person who comes to your mind immediately. “Hina. She’s known the Akis for a long time, and she probably knew the other gods, too.”

Mori seems hesitant at first, but thinks about it. “I guess you’re right. It’s awfully cruel to ask her about that, in more ways than one, but…”

She lets her voice trail off, which confuses you. “Cruel?”

Mori shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter. You wouldn’t understand, and she would be happy to help you anyway. Forget it. It’s a good idea.”

She’s right; you don’t understand. But if Mori says that it doesn’t matter, then you’re still willing to give it a try.

“However,” Mori continues, “if you’re looking for ideas, then maybe you shouldn’t be asking about the old gods. There’s a reason they aren’t still around, y’know? Maybe we should go in a different direction. If we want to attract followers, we need charisma, right? Who do we know that has a lot of charisma?”

Keine’s the first that comes to mind, but there’s no way you’re asking her for help twice in the same day. Ultimately, you come up with nothing.

“Mima!” Mori announces. “She was an evil overlord, right? That means she probably has some more human-like ideas that would appeal to the people of today’s Gensokyo.”

Just hearing her name makes you feel more hungover. “You really want to involve Mima again after what happened last night?”

Mori shrugs. “Do you have any better ideas?”

No, you sure don’t. “Well, she said she would be bringing over that mirror today, so it’s about as convenient as talking to Hina would be.”

If you want to hike all the way out to the farm to talk to the Akis today, then you don’t have time to talk to both Mima and Hina. You’d rather not put this off any longer either — the harvest festival is drawing nearer and nearer, and one more day without a plan is one less day to prepare.

[] You agree with Mori. Innovation will be better for Shizuha, and Mima probably has lots of ideas on how to attract followers.

[] You like your idea more. Shizuha would be more comfortable with traditional ideas, and Hina should know all about traditions.

[] Isn’t it sad, Cirno?


The files on PI’s drive are currently under construction. Please wait warmly while PI and Mori type up new ones.
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Hina or Mima.
Why do you present us with such cruel choice, OP?
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[x] You like your idea more. Shizuha would be more comfortable with traditional ideas, and Hina should know all about traditions.


>[] Isn’t it sad, Cirno?

...whut. I gotta be missing something here.
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File 151204868917.jpg - (356.78KB, 900x900, Cirno having a great time at the bar.jpg)
Cirno having a great time at the bar
Cirno, the strongest fairy that's still serving as a pet/freezer in Lucky's bar.

Remember Lucky, right? The exiled Oni that was still alive when gods roamed Gensokyo?
(Old) Hell, even if he wasn't Cirno sure was... but good luck making her remember or care.

[x] You like your idea more. Shizuha would be more comfortable with traditional ideas, and Hina should know all about traditions.
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> “You have no idea what that kind of declaration does for a god. Don’t joke around about that, Big Brother.”
Are you saying that gods and goddesses are, on the heights of their power, in a perpetual state of arousal?

[X] You like your idea more. Shizuha would be more comfortable with traditional ideas, and Hina should know all about traditions.
Difficult choice, so I flipped a coin.
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[X] You like your idea more. Shizuha would be more comfortable with traditional ideas, and Hina should know all about traditions.

Please Please Hina time!
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I re-read Cirno's appearances before I voted. I'm just not seeing what she or Lucky has to do with helping the Akis.

I mean, come on - when was the last time you saw a fairy or oni at church?
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[x] You like your idea more. Shizuha would be more comfortable with traditional ideas, and Hina should know all about traditions.
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[x] You like your idea more. Shizuha would be more comfortable with traditional ideas, and Hina should know all about traditions.

While I do hope we get to drop in on Lucky and Cirno again, this seems like a more feasible option.
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My bad on the delay; I'm getting busier with the holidays approaching. Expect something this week.

Wouldn't you be?

I like putting in off-the-wall choices sometimes.
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I was trying to catch up on this and the files on the google drive seem to be missing, there's only one short document about a butcher now. Does anyone have the rest?
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They're missing from GDrive because they're missing from PI's laptop. It's a meta thing.

Anyway, it seems Kotohime was behind the corrupted file after all...
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ashamed hina
[x] You like your idea more. Shizuha would be more comfortable with traditional ideas, and Hina should know all about traditions.

“I get what you’re saying,” you begin, “but should we really cast aside tradition like that? I think the people of today’s Gensokyo could use some — and I think the people of the slums are willing to accept it.”

Mori looks at you like something’s on your face. “That’s surprisingly optimistic of you, Big Brother.” Then she frowns. “Unfortunately, humans are stubborn. If they’ve already made the change, then I have my doubts they’re going to go back to the way things were.”

This is a change in how Mori acted with Shizuha before. Maybe talking about her past has muddled some of her confidence since then. “I thought you were all gung-ho about this,” you remark. “As a native god, should you really be thinking like that?”

Mori crosses her arms. “I’m just talking practically, as someone who’s experienced a similar situation in the outside world. The tengu can pretend to lead Gensokyo’s industrial revolution, but sooner or later the humans are gonna surprise them. In the end, the humans will take the reins and advance their own civilization. The people of the outside world looked away from the past and created their own future — without gods like me or youkai like the tengu in it. I don’t know if the people of Gensokyo will be any different.”

She speaks from wisdom — and perhaps loneliness. You recall that Mori wanted to disappear quietly when she was in the outside world, and she may come to the same conclusion here in Gensokyo if things play out in a similar way. It isn’t much, but you can at least tell her what’s on your mind. “I want you to be a part of the future,” you assure her.

Her coy grin causes you to realize how that sounded and immediately backpedal. “I meant all of the gods, and youkai. You, Shizuha, Minoriko…”

However, her grin only gets bigger. “Uh huh,” she says smugly. “I don’t have to look into your spirit to know what you meant.” Then she places her hands on her hips. “Regardless, I’m willing to go along with your idea. Maybe it’s more difficult to get rid of tradition than I thought. If that seed is still in the minds of humans, we can help Shizuha and Minoriko make it grow.”

You nod and stand up from the couch. “It’s better if it works out that way. If they give up on tradition, then gods and youkai will lose part of themselves, right?” The image of that desperate bug youkai comes to mind. “It would be a shame if that happened.”

Mori laughs and slaps you on your lower back, hard enough to sting a bit. “Well said! Let’s go talk to Hina.”


Hina answers the door after you knock twice — and even then she merely cracks it open for you. “C—come in.”

You and Mori exchange confused glances as you both enter. Hina stands on the other side of the room, and motions to her solitary table from afar. Her face is flushed red, and she avoids your eyes. “Please sit,” she says, before hurrying off to her kitchen.

“You think something’s wrong?” Mori whispers as she takes her seat.

It is strange that she wouldn’t immediately embrace you or make a comment about your aura. However, it’s Hina. “It’s hard to tell with her,” you answer Mori just as quietly, as you sit next to her. “Let’s just roll with it for now.”

Hina reappears quickly, and sets one brightly-colored can of Kappa-ade POWER Tea™ in front of you, and another in front of Mori. Then she sits down in the chair across from you, still refusing to look you in the face. “I hope you enjoy it,” she says, forcing a smile at the surface of the table in front of her.

You pick up the can — which is room temperature — and once again struggle to understand what’s going on in Hina’s head. This is one of those mixes of lemon-flavored tea with a bunch of caffeine dumped into it, courtesy of the kappa. It’s a common sight in their factories, where both human and kappa workers are addicted for the short burst of energy — followed by complete lethargy afterward.

“It’s not like I’m ungrateful, Hina,” you begin, “but is something wrong? You seem a bit off — which is saying something.”

Normally you wouldn’t be so rude, but Hina is a different species of creature. And sure enough, she doesn’t take offense. “I—I thought it was quaint how we drank tea at Alice’s home,” she explains. “I lack the equipment for home-brewed tea, so I thought this might be a similar experience.”

Well, a bump of caffeine isn’t the worst thing in the world for you right now — but that still doesn’t explain Hina’s behavior. She wouldn’t get all antsy over something like this. You glance to your side and see that Mori is already sucking hers down — out of concern, surely.

The little goddess puts the can down, lets out a big breath, and licks her lips. “Amazing. The kappa have perfectly captured the taste of the outside world’s products.”

You glare at her, and she shrugs.

Hina pops the tab on her own can with a hiss, and then takes a humble sip. Unlike with you, she isn’t afraid to look at Mori directly. “I also enjoy the taste, though I am afraid the chemicals have no effect on my energy levels.”

What a shame. Watching Hina bounce off the walls — from a safe distance, mind — would be interesting. However, you can’t help but boldly address the red-and-green elephant in the room. “Is there something wrong with me, Hina? I can’t help but notice you’re avoiding me.”

Hina’s forced smile collapses. “I am,” she admits, holding her face in her hands. “I have not done as you asked me to. I could not find any answers concerning my state of being. I have thought and thought and thought since we last spoke, but still I come up empty-handed for you. I am so ashamed that I must hold back drinking in the delicious wave of misfortune that I can feel from you, even as you lingered below in your apartment. I am unworthy.”

You can’t help but sigh. “Is that it? Hina, you should take as long as you need to. Those answers are for your sake, not mine. You aren’t unworthy of whatever deliciousness I’m putting out. I think if you’re doing some soul-searching, then you’re supposed to be a bit selfish.”

She jolts out of her seat so fast that it startles you and Mori both. “If such things are true,” Hina begins, “Then i—it is alright if I take hold of you? Would that be sufficiently selfish of me?”

If this is going to happen, then you might as well get it over with. You stand and spread your arms like a saint giving his blessing. “If that’s what you want.”

Hina rushes around the table and into your arms, shuddering with delight as she takes deep breaths that you can feel on the nape of your neck — in addition to the pleasant softness of her chest pressed against yours. She even starts to rub her face on you — kind of like a cat. It’s easily the most clingy and bizarre embrace yet. Truly, you are a martyr.

It’s impossible not to notice Mori’s cold gaze. “I’m not sure I see what’s so delicious about him. If anything, I think Big Brother is enjoying this too much.”

If you could shrug right now, you would. “No comment.”

Hina separates herself from you and looks back at Mori. “Why do you call him big brother? Even if he is blood-related to you, he would be your distant descendant at most.”

“We aren’t blood-related,” she states — strongly. “It’s like a term of endearment. Men enjoy it a lot, for some reason.”

That’s a gross over-simplification, and even a bit sexist, but you find it hard to disagree openly. “It was your idea,” you mention to Mori, before addressing Hina’s concerns. “She’s mostly doing it to tease me, and only for today.”

Hina deflates. “I see. So it is merely a jest. I thought that you were offering your services as a big brother, and I considered purchasing them. After all, the family structure seems very helpful in determining one’s place in the world — or so I have witnessed.”

Of course that’s what she would be looking for. “Sorry to disappoint you. No offense, but I don’t need two ancient beings referring to me as their older sibling.”

Mori winces. “Ancient? Now that’s just tasteless. I know we’re not really mortals, but we’re still women, y’know.”

Hina doesn’t seem to share in Mori’s offense, however. “By all accounts, we would be considered ancient, little one.”

“Yeah, but—” Then Mori stops herself and sighs. “—nevermind. Didn’t we come here for a reason, Big Brother?”

Hina perks up. “Oh? Yes, of course you did. Please tell me. I will help however I can.”


You and Mori explain your idea to Hina, who has seated herself across from you once again. She nods along with each of you in her measured fashion, not interrupting once. Only when you finish does she respond with a smile, “I am honored you thought of me. However, I am afraid I will not be able to help you very much.”

Hina’s probably just being humble, so you press harder. “You’ve spoken with many of Gensokyo’s gods, haven’t you? Surely there’s something you’ve observed or learned from them about maintaining their presence in Gensokyo.”

“Please remember that I was enshrined like a goddess,” Hina responds solemnly. “Those gods must have seen me as competition. They would have been reluctant to share any knowledge of faith-gathering with me, even had I asked.”

That does sound likely. You heave a great sigh, but before you can say anything, Hina continues quickly. “However, I would also hate to disappoint you. Please, allow me to assist in some way with the elder Aki’s dilemma. Listening to your plans so far, I believe there is something you have not considered: Shizuha Aki is a seasonal goddess.”

You blink a couple of times. “Yes Hina,” you reply dryly. “I was aware of that.”

Hina maintains a pleasant smile despite your tone. “I see. Then, you are aware that means Shizuha would be competing with other seasonal gods for faith, yes?”

Now there’s an angle you haven’t thought of. If there’s goddesses of autumn, there would probably be deities representing the other seasons as well. “So we turn this into a battle between the seasons, then. Who are the other seasonal gods in Gensokyo?”

Hina thinks for a moment, then another, and finally shakes her head. “I apologize. I do not know of any. It is highly possible that any seasonal deities that existed in Gensokyo have since vanished.”

“Then Shizuha is winning by default,” you grumble, “and it doesn’t matter one bit.”

“But gods aren’t the only things that can be seasonal,” Mori speaks up. “There’s seasonal youkai, too. You know anything about them, Hina?”

Hina’s face lightens up. “Oh! Yes I do, as a matter of fact. There is a murderous flower youkai who is especially powerful in the summer, and a snow woman who leads those that travel mindlessly in winter snowstorms to their deaths.” She thinks a little harder. “There is also a fairy who announces spring, but unlike the others she would be almost impossible to find outside her season.”

Beating up a fairy wouldn’t be worth much in the grand scheme of things, anyway. “So in the end, we’re going back to Shizuha’s original plan of beating youkai up.”

“At least this time we’re choosing our targets wisely,” Mori says. “But we can’t just have Shizuha spontaneously fight these youkai. It has to be a proper extermination, so people will notice. Are these youkai troubling humans right now, Hina?”

“I have heard some rumors,” Hina mentions. “The flower youkai is said to stalk those walking the streets and pressure them into buying flowers. If they refuse her, she kills them where they stand. The snow woman, on the other hand, has made herself into a great nuisance by breaking into people’s homes during the day, throwing everything in their refrigerator out, and sleeping inside of it. They say even the strongest man can’t move her while she sleeps.”

“Wow, so these are some bona fide youkai,” Mori remarks. “Well, it shouldn’t be like last time. If Shizuha takes the lead and we support her, then we can take down any youkai as long as we have a strategy.”

Mori’s confident, but so are you — as long as Shizuha’s going to be the one in front. You’d rather not be in a situation like when you were fighting that bug youkai. “Sounds good to me.”

It sounds like these youkai are active even outside their own seasons, but they could be hard to find if they’re randomly prowling the city looking for victims. Therefore, you should only target one, for now.

[] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.

[] If you’re doing this, it’s either go big or stay home. How strong could a flower youkai be?
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Deepest apologies about the lateness. Work is hell.

>>65241 is correct. The reason for it is that I didn't like how they were structured before and I think I can make them a bit more organized, a bit more concise, and even a bit more interesting (with Mori's help, of course). Again, please wait warmly while this is done.
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So, one doesn't seem to deserve to die and the other is way too strong...

[X] Snow Lady

We'll see how she is once we find her.
The other option should find us in a stronger position. Because, if the Akis are going to gain power, a confrontation with the Flower Youkai Of The Four Seasons is inevitable.
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[x] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.

Summer is a more, well, logical thing for a fall goddess to defeat, and it would be awesome as all hell for Shizuha to beat the stuffing out of Yuuka... but she couldn't even finish off Wriggle. Yeah, no.
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[x] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.

Because honestly Letty going around ruining peoples' refrigerators is hilarious.
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[x] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.

Hina should've been the onee-chan.

PI: My little sister is an ancient goddess. So is my big sis. Don't fuck with me.
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[X] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.

Winter is defeat autumn but Yukka is just to strong. Maybe with Letty Shizuka has more chance.
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So, our options here are: have Shizuha fight Letty, a Yuuki-Onna who she has type disadvantage against, or have her fight Yuuka, who is stupid strong and would probably end PI's life by breathing on him a bit too hard.

[X] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.

I don't care how suspicious your choices of targets make me, this is the only one that I can see any success in. While nature might have taken a hit, Mugenzuka is still safe, and I don't even remember if Yuuka even would experience a loss in strength from rapid, destructive urbanization
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[X] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.

1) I want to see Letty.
2) Trashing peoples' homes is something that must be punished.
3) Yuuka will get her own desserts at some point from us.
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[x] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.

Let's start with the stage 1 boss.

Just a note, the contacts file slips into 2nd person a few times.
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Thanks for letting me know! The files are still a WIP, but I went ahead and fixed those typos.

I'll make a proper announcement when the files are actually ready to be used as a proper reference.
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When will be the next part?
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I still fell into the "Updateless bump" trap, even with the Mystery box open.

I guess hope IS in the bottom of it.
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[x] The snow woman sounds like a good target for Shizuha, and it should be safe dealing with her outside of winter.


Shizuha Aki fidgets uncomfortably when surrounded by the grayness of the city. Her face sharpens into a scowl that twitches whenever her eyes meet yours. “What are you lookin’ at?”

When you went to pick her up from Minoriko’s farm, her face had been shining with enthusiasm — despite being smeared with dirt. Since the last time you spoke, Shizuha has been “reluctantly” helping her sister with the farmwork since the younger Aki became weaker. The two seem to have done some talking and put the bulk of their conflict behind them — Minoriko even sent Shizuha off with a smile.

Seeing the contrast now, you can’t restrain a grin. “Just observing. You really aren’t comfortable in the city, are you?”

She groans. “I’m completely outta my element. I mean, there’s barely any trees! And I can’t see the forest or the mountain. It’s bizarre.”

As a goddess associated with nature, you have no doubt she isn’t exaggerating.

There’s another goddess, however, who doesn’t hesitate to laugh at Shizuha’s discomfort. “I’ve never felt that way,” Mori says. “All the concrete and brick is still from the earth even if it’s been shaped by human hands.”

You can’t help but notice how prideful she is about that. It seems like some gods have more of an affinity with modern society than others, and that distance is exactly what Shizuha Aki needs to overco—

CHA-LA, HEAD CHA-LA! Just as loudly as my heart pou—

You fumble around for your new cell phone while cursing Hatate’s obnoxious choice of a ringtone under your breath. In order to silence it, you answer without even looking at the screen. “Hello?”

Hina’s pleasant voice is crisply received through the phone’s speaker. “Hello, PI. Have you returned to the city with Shizuha Aki?”

“Yeah, we just passed the Kappa Burger,” you respond loudly. “Have you found anything?”

“I have,” Hina answers. “It appears that you were correct about my abilities.”

While you and Mori went out to the forest to get Shizuha Aki, Hina’s job was to use her inherent misfortune detector to possibly find the snow woman. Having a youkai take up residence in your refrigerator would have to make a pretty big blip on that radar, or at least that’s what you figured.

You had no idea Hina would be able to find her this quickly, though. “That’s great, Hina! I thought we would be searching for a while.”

She’s quiet for a moment. “I was helpful?”

“Of course you were,” you assure her. “I don’t think anybody else could’ve found one youkai in this big city in just a couple of hours.”

She giggles. “I do thank you. I am honored that my abilities are useful to you, however it may be.”

You can’t imagine Hina receiving praise very often, so it’s kind of cute — if only you could see her face now. A wary glare from Mori quickly convinces you to move on, however. “So, where is she, Hina?”

“She is currently sleeping in a small freezer owned by a family called Imaizumi. Their home is located—”

“Don’t worry, Hina. I know where it is,” you tell her briskly. “See you there.”

You hang up without waiting for her response and take a moment to accept your situation.

The Imaizumis. Hina keeps being proven right — you really are the least fortunate of all.


The Imaizumis live on the fringe between the city and the bamboo forest, in a small apartment building much like your own. However, unlike yours, their building is actually packed full with tenants — apparently all in some way related to a clan of hunters that existed in Gensokyo long ago. The father of the Imaizumis is one of the few that still hunt, while the others have more or less assimilated into the tengu’s workforce. Besides the father, there was the grandmother, the mother, and the two daughters — but the grandmother passed not long ago, and the elder daughter — Kagerou — is still deeply estranged from her family. So now, it would only be the father, the mother, and the younger daughter.

Your reminescence of these facts in preparation for the task ahead is, of course, commentated by the two goddesses walking by you.

“He only makes that expression when it’s someone from his past,” Mori remarks.

Shizuha stares into your face, which you ignore. “Really? I dunno. Reminds me of a soldier marchin’ into war or somethin’.”

“His past is a war,” Mori explains. “You see, my dear big brother is a man of many mysteries. Putting aside who he was before he became the hard-boiled private investigator we all know and love, PI has years of experience working here in the slums. Who knows what kind of strange sights he’s witnessed, and strange women he’s seduced — or that seduced him.”

“Wow,” Shizuha remarks with awe in her eyes. “Ain’t that somethin’! Now, how do ya know all that?”

“Because she’s one of those strange women,” you cut in dryly. “One of the ones that have tried seducing me, anyway.”

Shizuha gasps like a housewife. “Mori! I didn’t think you were one of them types of goddesses.”

You wonder exactly what Shizuha means, but when you catch a look of Mori’s face your question falls right back down your throat. She’s smiling, but it’s tight — and her eyes are devoid of that happy-go-lucky charm. She’s obviously been irked. “And what exactly would be wrong with me seducing a human, Shizuha Aki? What are you trying to say?”

Shizuha seems to pick up on it and quickly tries to placate her. “I didn’t mean anything by it, I just uh, might’a been a little curious about how it all, um, works.”

However, in typical Mori fashion, she doesn’t dwell on it — outwardly, at least. “It works the same as it would any other being,” she answers, more relaxed. “Something goes into an orifice. Pleasure is had. Are you telling me that you, a goddess, don’t even know so much?”

Shizuha’s face turns as red as some of the colors she paints leaves with. “For, for cryin’ out loud! I know that much! I just wanted to know how Minoriko—ah, nevermind! It’s fusstratin’! And embarrassin’. So I’m just gonna stop.”

Mori chuckles, while you can’t help but feel a little let-down. It sounded like Shizuha was going to talk about something interesting, and a distraction would have been nice.


Once you can see the building, you immediately spot the tall Hina standing next to a short man with thinning dark hair — one you hoped would somehow not be here. He quickly notices you as well, but waits until you get closer to turn and greet you with an expected venom on his tongue. “Hello, bastard.”

Mori and Shizuha pause and search your face for clues as to what’s going on, while Hina seems oblivious to his tone and smiles at you like nothing’s wrong. You muster your best business smile. “Good afternoon, Mister Imaizumi. I can’t say I expected to see you again so soon.”

“The feeling’s mutual,” he grumbles. “I thought Miss Hina here said that you would be bringing a goddess.” His eyes regard Mori and Shizuha coldly. “All I see are two girls. Is this some kind of joke?”

Shizuha steps forward to challenge him. “Ain’t nothin’ like that,” she says. “I’m the autumn goddess, Shizuha Aki. And I don’t usually mind a person’s tone, but you’re really pissin’ me off right outta the gate. Can’t you show a little respect?”

Mister Imaizumi scowls at her. “Respect? You sound like any old youkai that’s high on its horse. Even if you are a god, you haven’t done a damn thing for me. Don’t tell me what I should and shouldn’t respect.” Then he looks at you. “Especially when it comes to this youkai-lover.”

Hina nods along with Mister Imaizumi. “That is true, PI has indeed had carnal relations with youkai. In fact, he relayed to me a particular story about an encounter with a wer—”

Letting her continue would be the worst possible thing that could happen. “Stop talking, Hina,” you cut her off harshly. “Please.”

Hina looks at everyone quizzically. “I am sorry, was I speaking out of turn? Please tell me when I may speak again.”

It would probably be for the best if you let her stay quiet. “Thank you, Hina,” you say before addressing Mister Imaizumi. “I know we don’t have a friendly history, Mister Imaizumi, but didn’t you know who Hina was calling? If you’re that unhappy with my presence, I would be more than willing to leave you be.”

He exhales with disgust. “Don’t ask questions that you already know the answer to, smooth-talking bastard. It just makes this more shameful.”

The nearby door flings open, and out comes Missus Imaizumi. She’s noticeably taller — and younger — than her husband, with long, brown hair that she passed on to both her daughters. Her dark eyes regard her husband like daggers. “The only thing that’s shameful here is your stubborn attitude,” she remarks, before turning to you and smiling brightly. “PI! I’m glad to see you. And he is too, even if he doesn’t act like it. When Miss Hina told us she was calling you, he instantly started thinking of how he could ask you about Kagerou.”

Mister Imaizumi’s ears turn red. “Hey now! They don’t need to know anything about that! I don’t care one bit to find out how she’s been doing, or if she misses home, or anything like that!” Then he pauses, probably realizing how his denial betrayed him. “Bah! I’ll be inside! Let your ‘goddess’ figure all this out!”

With that, Mister Imaizumi storms back inside, past his wife, who can barely restrain her laughter until the door is shut. “Really, that man. He’s been trying to get rid of that awful youkai on his own for a few days straight. Won’t let anyone help him, of course. He’s always been too prideful for his own good. Please don’t hold it against him, PI.”

You sigh. “I try not to, ma’am.”

A few years ago you were introduced to Mister Imaizumi in order to help him find his daughter, Kagerou, who had gone missing while out with him on a hunt. You eventually discovered that she had become a werewolf and was frightened to reveal herself to her family. It was your efforts that convinced her to see her family again, but when the family was apprehensive about her condition, you supported Kagerou’s idea that she take her leave of the family — so as to not cause them any trouble in human society. Kagerou’s request to you was to keep her location a secret from her family, for their own safety. Of course, Mister Imaizumi still blames you for all of it, but the mother and the younger daughter are content — so long as every once in a while you let them know how Kagerou’s doing.

You expect her to ask of her estranged daughter in her husband’s stead, but instead the mother turns to Shizuha with a warm smile. “You’re the goddess, are you?”

Faced with such a contrast between husband and wife, Shizuha becomes flustered and bows meekly. “Yes. I am Shizuha Aki, ma’am. I am here to humbly assist.”

Missus Imaizumi laughs at Shizuha’s stilted but cute manners. “If you’re a goddess, you’re awfully polite. I’d be honored to have your help, Miss Aki. Or would that be Lady Aki?”

You can’t tell if she’s taking Shizuha seriously or not, and in a way that might be a little more hurtful than Mister Imaizumi’s more direct disbelief. But if it affects Shizuha’s morale, it doesn’t show on her face. “Lady Aki is fine, ma’am.”

Then Missus Imaizumi addresses Mori. “And I wonder why PI’s brought along since a sweet little thing like yourself.”

Mori smiles. “Nice to meet ya. I’m his partner, Mori. We live together.”

“Only in a business sense,” you add, before realizing you did so only out of habit and now you’ve made it seem far more suspicious than you intended.

Fortunately, Missus Imaizumi doesn’t take it that way, but is still prepared to give you some grief over it. “Why, she looks even younger than Okami. And she helps you investigate youkai cases? Are you taking care of her properly? You haven’t involved her in anything dangerous, have you?”

“She involves herself,” your protest meekly.

The mother of two places her hands on her hips indignantly. “Now you know good and well that’s no excuse! Do you understand that if she’s with you, she’s your responsibility? That as her guardian, you have to protect her first and foremost?”

“He does,” Mori cuts in. “There’s nobody else I would trust more in all of Gensokyo. He’s like the big brother I never had.”

If only she would say things like that to you directly. Then again, once you think about it, she isn’t really complimenting you that much.

However, Mori’s words do deflate Missus Imaizumi. “Well, yes, but—” Then she sighs. “—oh well. None of you are here to listen to me crone on. How much do you know about our youkai problem?”

“Only the jist,” you answer. “Please tell us how you discovered her, and we’ll go from there.”

Of course, she isn’t about to let you all stand outside. After inviting everyone inside the Imaizumi home — one with a similar layout to yours but far cleaner and warmer — the four of you end up sitting at a table while Missus Imaizumi pours tea and explains the situation.

“We have a shed out back that has a large freezer in it,” she begins. “Mostly it’s used to keep the meat that my husband brings back from his hunts. The other day, I went out to grab some sausage for breakfast. I unlocked our shed and noticed that it was even colder than usual. When I opened the freezer, there she was, asleep in there like it was her birthright. I knew right away it was a youkai, and I went to grab my husband. He tried poking her with his spear, and it didn’t do anything — just bounced off. We closed the freezer for a while so we could figure out what to do. When my husband tried opening the freezer again, it was froze shut. We think the youkai turned the freezer to its lowest temperature when she crawled in.”

“So we have no idea how she got in there in the first place,” you remark.

“Does it matter?” Shizuha speaks up. “All we need to do is get in there and kick her out.”

“But how will you get the freezer open?” Missus Imaizumi continues. “I can give you a key, but we don’t have anything to thaw the door besides shutting the freezer off, which would be an absolute last resort. If we risk spoiling the meat, then we’re risking our livelihood.”

“Nobody’s asking you to do that,” you tell her. “That’s why we’re here.”

Missus Imaizumi reaches into her brooch and produces a single, old-looking key attached to a string on her neck. “This is the key that unlocks the door. I keep it with me always, and then there’s a spare that my husband or my daughters can use when they need it.”

“And they’re the only ones who know about the keys?” you mention, just to be sure.

She nods. “They are, and I did check on the spare — it’s right where it’s supposed to be. If you like, I could go with you to unlock the shed.”

Mori’s eyes meet yours for a moment. She’s just as suspicious as you are, but you don’t want to press it.

“That’s okay,” you tell Missus Imaizumi, “only the key is fine. To be safe, you should remain here with your husband. It may be her off-season, but she’s a strong youkai.” You turn to Hina, who is watching you intently. “Hina, you can lead us to the shed, right?”

She nods, but remains quiet. Then you remember Hina’s been on silent mode this whole time. “And you can talk now,” you add, “so long as you don’t discuss that story.”


After everyone finishes their tea, you, Mori, Shizuha, and Hina leave. You have the key to the Imaizumis’ shed in your pocket, and the weight of the task is not an unfamiliar one.

However, before Hina can lead you to the shed, you are approached by two teenage girls — the shorter of the two you instantly recognize. “Good afternoon, Okami.”

The Imaizumis’ youngest daughter has always been a little ball of energy — in stark contrast to her older sister. However, they still look the same — without any lupine features, of course. Okami used to have her hair long but cut it not long after Kagerou left. Even in the cool autumn breeze, she rolls up the sleeves of her uniform and refuses to wear leggings. She’s always been clingy and playful, to the point where she fails to realize that she’s no longer a little kid — and is actually pretty strong.

But after you greet her, she doesn’t tackle you, laugh, or even smile. Instead, she seems a little hesitant to even look you in the eye. “Oh, PI. I figured they were gonna call you.”

You shrug her behavior off as a typical case of puberty and turn to her friend, who is much taller, broader, and could even be mistaken for a man if it weren’t for her long, purple hair and the girl’s school uniform. When your eyes meet, she bows to you. “Forgive me,” she says solemnly, “I will not linger.” Then she turns to Okami. “Farewell.”

Okami smiles a little bit and waves. “Bye, Meira.”

The purple-haired girl trods off. Looking at her back, you remember that you’ve seen her before: she’s a server at the nearby Kappa Burger and has brought you your food a number of times. Before you can say anything, she’s already disappeared around the corner, and such a slight acquaintance isn’t really worth shouting out to her over.

When you look back to Okami, you feel glares from all around, including Okami herself. “I know she’s tall, but she’s still too young for you.”

“I wasn’t—” you begin, before realizing how well denying these things has worked out for you in the past. “—nevermind. Yes, Okami, I’m here to help.”

She looks past you to the other girls. “So you’re all gonna get rid of her?”

You shake your head and step aside to present Shizuha to Okami. “We’re not. She is.”

It takes a second before Shizuha realizes it’s her cue, and then she swiftly clears her throat. “Yes. I am Shizuha Aki, autumn goddess. Please don’t worry. I’ll help set things right.”

Her eyes — dark, like her mother’s and Kagerou’s — scan Shizuha before returning to you. “I see. Well, whatever. Good luck, I guess.”

Okami wastes no time going through you and the others, into her home. She doesn’t give a second glance to any of you.

Shizuha winces after the door shuts. “Ouch. So this is what it feels like to be blown off, huh? By a kid, no less…”

“Not a very nice child, is she?” Mori remarks.

“She normally is,” you argue. “I don’t know. Something might be wrong, or it could just be that she’s that age.”

All three of the girls look at you, totally confused. You quickly realize your error. “Puberty,” you clarify. “I guess none of you would be familiar with that, huh?”

Hina smiles brightly. “Ah! I know. I’ve heard that blood leaks from the nethers of teenage girls occasionally. So, that wound is called ‘puberty’, and it would explain her apparently odd behavior? How fascinating.”

Shizuha smirks proudly. “Now ya see, I don’t think that’s right at all. I didn’t smell a drop of blood on her. I mean, come on, not even humans would just start bleedin’ all of a sudden, right?”

All Mori gives you is a shit-eating grin, enjoying your regret. You started this conversation, and now you’re going to cut it short. “We’ll have a long talk about it after this is all over with,” you tell them. “But for now, we should get to work.”

Shizuha pumps her fist. “Right, yeah! Ain’t no time to be worryin’ about bleedin’ nethers. Let’s go evict a snow woman!”

You stare at Shizuha’s hopeful expression, and wonder.

[] Wait, let’s talk to the father again. It would probably be more beneficial for Shizuha if she can convince him to work together with her.

[] Wait, let’s talk to the daughter again. You haven’t met a family yet where the kid wasn’t keeping something from their parents.

[] Let Shizuha handle this her way. She’s the goddess, and if you do all the work then that defeats the point of this.

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what year is it
Sorry. I don't really have an excuse for the unannounced hiatus, besides general exhaustion and the writer's block it's caused. I'm ready to get back into the swing of things, though.

There should always be hope. Unless we're talking about Border House.
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Eyy, glad you're back!

[X] Wait, let’s talk to the daughter again. You haven’t met a family yet where the kid wasn’t keeping something from their parents.

I'm interested in the kid.
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Also, bit of an off-topic, but has there been any description on how PI looks? or perhaps an illustration?
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[x] Wait, let’s talk to the daughter again. You haven’t met a family yet where the kid wasn’t keeping something from their parents.

The mother was suspicious but she seems stubborn. We might have more luck with the daughter, though I doubt it, unless she still trusts PI... which doesn't seem likely.

Oh well.
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[x] Wait, let’s talk to the daughter again. You haven’t met a family yet where the kid wasn’t keeping something from their parents.

Yeah, something's fishy about her. Maybe she's being bribed by Letty with free ice-cream all year long.
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[x] Wait, let’s talk to the daughter again. You haven’t met a family yet where the kid wasn’t keeping something from their parents.
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[x] Let Shizuha handle this her way. She’s the goddess, and if you do all the work then that defeats the point of this.

I'd be all for talking to Okami, but she doesn't really seem like she wants to talk to PI.

Also good to have you back, Raftclans.
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There was this thing someone drew >>64680

[x] Let Shizuha handle this her way. She’s the goddess, and if you do all the work then that defeats the point of this.

If Shizuha wants people to have faith in her as a goddess, then she can't be getting help from a human all the time.
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Kana route when? ;..;
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You misspelt Keine, buddy.
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"Officially" no, just that he's a tired, sour-looking motherfucker in his mid-to-late thirties who doesn't stand out. I do like the portrayal in >>64680, though.

Not in this story, but in another. Eventually.

There was a reply here, but it's gone now.
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Crappily Drawn Fantasies
Did a quick sketch.
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I love it! PI and Mori look great. I'm really liking what you did with their style — the loose tie for PI and Mori and her hat's eyes are nice touches.
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[X] Wait, let’s talk to the daughter again. You haven’t met a family yet where the kid wasn’t keeping something from their parents.

You find yourself drawn to the door that Okami just went through. She’s acting strange — too strange to write off as a coincidence. “Hold on,” you tell the others. “There may be more to the story, here.”

Shizuha deflates. “Wha? I thought we had this figured out. Seems pretty simple, to me.”

“It could be,” you say, “but I’ve found that it never is. We humans are pretty complex, especially when it’s least convenient. For one thing, we don’t know how the snow woman managed to get into a locked building without breaking in.”

“I mean, she’s a snow woman!” she argues. “Can’t she just, uh, woosh on in there? Ain’t that somethin’ they can do?”

You take a deep breath. “No, I’m pretty confident a snow woman can’t ‘woosh’ into a building.”

“Does it even matter anyhow?” Shizuha continues. “She got in, that’s the problem. Now we gotta get her out!”

Mori places her hand on Shizuha’s arm reassuringly. “Let’s trust PI. He has more experience with this kind of thing. You don’t wanna rush it, y’know? That might be counter-productive.”

“Fine, fine,” Shizuha concedes to you. “I reckon I oughta listen if ya got me this far. What are ya gonna do?”

“Nothing much,” you tell her, “just a quick chat with someone. Why don’t you three take the key and head to the freezer? You never know when she might wake up and try to move.”

You toss the key to Mori, who catches it but looks disappointed. “Another one-on-one conversation, huh?” she remarks.

“Sorry,” you tell her. “This is going to be a sensitive discussion.” Mori doesn’t look pleased, so you continue. “I’m trusting you with the key, alright? If something goes wrong, I’ll be counting on you and Hina to help Shizuha.”

Mori grips the key and turns around. “Fine, fine. You don’t have to sweet talk us like we’re kids, y’know. We’ll be waiting.”

Hina smiles and bows at you. “Do not worry, PI. As the older sister, I will remain diligent in my monitoring of the little one and Shizuha Aki.”

“H, hey!” Shizuha cries. “I can monitor myself, dang it!”

You sigh. If they don’t want you to treat them like kids, then they should stop acting like kids.


Missus Imaizumi raises her eyes at you when you reenter her home. “Welcome back. Did you forget something?”

Sugercoating it would just be suspicious, so you speak bluntly. “No, I wanted to ask Okami some questions.”

Her expression darkens, like any mother’s would when an older man asks to see their daughter. “Alone?”

“If you don’t mind.”

She sighs, and lowers her voice. “I don’t, but my husband sure will. Take her outside.”

You blink a couple of times. Her response isn't what you expected. “Really?”

“I’m glad you noticed it too,” she goes on. “If it’s you, she might open up about it. I know it has something to do with Kagerou — it’s the only reason she wouldn’t tell me or her father.”

If she knew the kinds of things you’ve done with her older daughter, she would probably have a much different attitude. But as of now, you’ll happily take this opportunity. “Right. That’s what I’m hoping.”

“Okami!” Missus Imaizumi calls. “Come here for a second!”

You hear a door open and Okami’s footsteps come down the hallway. “Mom, I just got home, can’t you give me two seconds before—”

She stops when she sees you standing in the kitchen. “What do you want?”

“PI wanted to ask you some questions,” her mother tells her. “Outside.”

Okami has the kind of reaction you were expecting: a step backward and a suspicious glare.

“About your sister,” you add.

Her stance and expression soften, and she crosses her arms. “Fine. I wanna talk to you, too.”

Okami slips into some shoes and follows you outside. Mori, Hina, and Shizuha are nowhere to be found. There aren’t even many passersby around these parts; it’s still too early for day shift to be over. You’d rather not lead Okami away from her home, so you take a few steps and lean against the wall.”So, what—”

“Right here?" she says, staring at you. "Really?”

“Why not?”

Okami shakes her head. “Mom can probably still hear us. Follow me, I’ve got a good spot.”


After a short climb up a less-than-stable ladder on the second floor, you and Okami reach the roof of the building. It’s only two stories high, so you can’t see much over the trees or the taller buildings in the city, but it’s a view nonetheless. You spot the shed that Missus Imaizumi was talking about; Mori and the others must already be inside.

“Neat, isn’t it?” she says, less reserved now. “Meira and I train up here sometimes.”

Hina likes the roof too, and you can see the appeal. It’s quiet and isolated up here — good for training or meditation, but you’re not sure this is the best place for a kid to hold clandestine meetings. “For your sake, you probably shouldn’t bring anyone else up here,” you warn her. “You never know what someone might be capable of.”

Okami laughs. “That’s so like you, always thinkin’ about how people can hurt each other. I’m a black belt now! I could whoop you or anyone else that thinks they can try anything on me.”

You seriously ponder that for a moment. She probably could beat you in a head-on match; your skills are pretty rusty and your body itself feels the same way. You’ve been a little dependent on your gun over the years.

Regardless, that’s not how it works in the real world, and you know it all too well. “That’s so like you,” you counter. “A seasoned martial artist would have trouble against a gun, a youkai, or even a surprise attack from an ordinary human. Don’t get a big head because you do good in a dojo.” You watch Okami’s frown for a moment before sighing. “But, I didn’t call you out to lecture you.”

Of course not,” she replies, with a haughty frown. “Geez, you sound just like Kagerou, but not nearly as cute.” Then her eyes regard you sharply. “What did you wanna ask about her?”

“The last time I spoke to Kagerou,” you begin, “she wanted to form a network of youkai that would help each other out in emergencies. Now, a youkai has mysteriously ended up in her family’s freezer, and you’re acting moody. I can tell what’s a coincidence and what isn’t.”

She crosses her arms again and puts on a wry grin. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Can’t a teenage girl be moody once in a while?”

“Okami,” you say sternly. “You’re awful at covering things up. That’s why Kagerou had to be the one to tell your mother that you did fine on your tests, or you didn’t wear makeup, or you didn’t piss the bed—”

“Alright, I get it!” she blurts out, face reddening. “I can’t believe she told you that!”

“We talked about you a lot.”

She frowns. “Past tense, huh?”

Shit. As far as her family knows, you’re still in contact with Kagerou — even though the last time you had any kind of contact with her was about a year ago and you have no idea what she’s been up to since. You’ll try to play it off. “Well, we can’t talk about you all the time.”

Her eyes harden into a glare. “Maybe you’re the one who should drop the act. I know that you two were dating, then you dumped her last year, so now you don’t talk anymore. You just tell my parents she’s doing okay because it makes them feel better.”

You really wish Okami didn’t know about yours and Kagerou’s relationship, but at least she’s outed herself in the process. “So Kagerou has been talking to you?”

She falters. “W, well yeah! We’re sisters! Is there something wrong with that?”

You watch her face. She can’t meet your eyes like she usually does. It’s guilt — and uncertainty. “There’s nothing wrong with that at all,” you tell her. “I just have a hunch that she didn’t reach out to you until recently — and she had something specific she wanted you to do. Like, for instance, sneak out and unlock the shed one night so that—”

“Fine, you caught me!” she admits. “My sister met me on my way home from school last week and we started talking. She wanted me to help a youkai who had fallen on hard times, and I agreed. So, I snuck out with the key, unlocked the shed, let the youkai in, and then locked it back up — just like my sister told me. She said that would make me an honorary member of the grassroots youkai network!”

That sure was an easy confession, but Okami isn’t really the type to keep secrets in the first place. You’re not surprised that Kagerou is behind all this, but you are concerned that she would use her sister like that. Kagerou has always been goal-oriented, but it isn’t like her to involve her family in youkai-related affairs; that was the reason she left them in the first place. Was this only a desperate favor, or is she starting to lose sight of her original feelings?

“If she needed someone to help her,” you mutter, “she should’ve called on me instead of getting you involved. All she’s doing is taking advantage of her rebellious younger sister.”

Okami stands with her chest puffed out proudly. “No way! I love my family, and that includes my sister — no matter what! I’ll help her any way I can! You say she should’ve talked to you, but would you do the same for her?”

“Not for her specifically,” you answer honestly, “but I’ll do whatever keeps humans and youkai from killing each other.”

“You don’t mean that!” Okami shouts back at you. “Or else you wouldn’t have brought a freakin’ goddess here! Where did you even find one, anyway? I thought they were all gone!”

“It’s a balance,” you try to explain calmly. “Gensokyo needs gods, Okami. Gods and youkai fight each other, humans worship gods, and humans fear youkai. That way nobody dies.”

“That doesn’t sound very balanced to me!” she retorts. “It sounds like you and my dad and that goddess just want to chase the youkai out of here. All she needs is a place to sleep until winter!”

“And that place isn’t your family’s meat freezer. You’re endangering their livelihood — yours too.”

Tears of frustration well in Okami’s eyes as she grips her fists tightly. “This is so wrong! Kagerou said you would be willing to help if Mom and Dad called you, but you brought that goddess and those weird girls and now I don’t know what to do! If that snow woman keeps walking around, then eventually she’s gonna die. Kagerou said that the tengu kicked her out of her hiding spot on the mountain because she’s so strong during the winter. If she can make it until then, she’ll be fine!”

The tengu. Of course they had something to do with this. It’s easy to dismiss Okami’s concerns because she’s a kid who isn’t looking at the big picture, but then again you and Kagerou never did either. You both wanted to help the lesser youkai, just you ended up doing it in different ways. Now, you’re helping a goddess — three goddesses, in fact. You’ve already killed one youkai and your actions might kill another — both just trying to survive. Are you also losing sight of your original feelings?

Before you can sort out your own thoughts, you hear a loud crash and splintering wood below. You and Okami both rush to the side of the building and look down to see a fresh, gaping hole in what you assume to be the Imaizumi’s shed.

Shizuha picks herself off the ground and spits on the ground. “Well then,” you can hear her say, “looks like you ain’t gonna leave peaceably.”

“Of course not,” responds the unfamiliar voice of a woman. Sure enough, a tall, white-haired woman in a blue-and-white dress emerges through the hole. “I won’t let you leave after so rudely interrupting my sleep, Shizuha Aki. A weak goddess who plays second fiddle to her own younger sister shouldn’t be cocky just because it’s autumn. You should have stayed in whatever hole you’ve been in.”

You can’t see Shizuha's face, but you can tell by the way her stance tightens up that the snow woman struck a nerve. “You’re the one who’s going to sleep for good, snow woman!” she roars, as she makes a wide sweep through the air with her arm. The downtrodden leaves on the ground fly up at the autumn goddess’s command, hovering in place before glowing with the reds, oranges, and browns of the season. Then a few at a time, they shoot towards the snow woman, who can dodge them — but perhaps not as gracefully as she’d like.

While Okami stands there and watches, you head back to the ladder. When you start climbing down, you hear her shout after you. “Wait! What are you doing?”

“I don’t know,” you tell her, before dropping down and running down the stairs to the ground-level. By the time the shed’s in sight, you can see Mori and Hina again, having slipped out of the battle. You waste no time in approaching them. “Are you two alright?”

Mori nods. “Yep, fine. We just had a little problem before you could finish your chit-chat.”

“She woke up,” Hina explains plainly. “Though that may have had something to do with Shizuha Aki banging on the freezer. I cannot say for sure.”

You run your fingers through your hair and try hard to keep the irritation out of your voice. “You two didn’t stop her?”

Mori shrugs. “We didn’t really expect the snow woman to pop out like that. I think she could tell we were coming. Even a sleeping youkai can smell two goddesses approaching, it seems.”

Damn it, you never thought about that. You figured you knew enough about youkai, but now that gods have been thrown into the mix, you keep getting surprised and it’s pissing you off.

“But, Shizuha was going to fight her anyway, right?” Mori goes on. “I don’t see a problem. That youkai isn’t very strong.” She turns back toward the fight and points. “I mean, look at her. Shizuha’s dominating.”

After running out of leaves from the ground, Shizuha calls out to the snow woman. “Not bad for a heavy sleeper, but take this! Falling Leaves of Madness!”

Shizuha lifts her leg and then slams her foot down. The trees near her shake, producing many more wilting leaves. When Shizuha waves her arm again, the new leaves rain down on the snow woman, surrounding and overwhelming her.

But just before the leaves strike, the snow woman throws her arms forward, creating a white mist that stops the leaves in mid-air. “Flower Wither Away!” she calls out.

All of the leaves freeze, shrivel, and fall to the ground, completely lifeless. However, despite defending successfully, the snow woman does not press her advantage. She’s fighting conservatively — and you can’t read her. Is she stronger than Shizuha? Weaker? Will she also go all-out if she’s pushed into a corner?

On the other hand, there’s already a crowd gathering. People in the building are coming out of their doors, while those walking by are stopping and watching in hushed awe. You can see Mister and Missus Imaizumi among them, the former holding his spear and looking particularly sour — probably about his shed. Shizuha isn’t in any position to back down with so many human eyes upon her.

[] For Shizuha’s sake, this extermination has to go off without a hitch. Sorry, but you can’t play into Kagerou’s hands today.

[] You can’t deny someone in need, youkai or not. Stop the fight.

[] Is there another way? (Write-in)
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[X] For Shizuha’s sake, this extermination has to go off without a hitch. Sorry, but you can’t play into Kagerou’s hands today.

Our job now is to help Shizuka, we can't just suddenly pivots around.
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[X] For Shizuha’s sake, this extermination has to go off without a hitch. Sorry, but you can’t play into Kagerou’s hands today.
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[x] For Shizuha’s sake, this extermination has to go off without a hitch. Sorry, but you can’t play into Kagerou’s hands today.

Well, hell. Too late to stop it now.

Maybe we could see if Lucky wants a new freezer after this?
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[x] You can’t deny someone in need, youkai or not. Stop the fight.

>pissing off youkais is good


t. Nah
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I mean, we already sorta-killed that one tengu. Ain't gonna change much.
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One thing is chasing off a random tengu using just a gun, something that it's not likely to admit later on. Another is pissing off a bunch of youkai instead of taking a


and potentially going ham on our ex-girlfriend in the process.
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Good point. And not to mention Kagewoo is one of my favourite 2hu (I blame wool)...

But we've already committed to help Shizuha, so unless someone comes up with a clever write-in, I'm of the opinion that duty comes first.

'sides, it's not like Kagerou's gonna send someone to whack her old flame, does she?
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[x] You can’t deny someone in need, youkai or not. Stop the fight.
He has too many ex-girlfriends
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[x] Interrupt before the actual extermination. Protecting humans does not mean exterminating Youkai.
-[x] If they inquire more, mention that she was driven here by the Tengu and we are not gonna be their cleaners. She's as much a victim as any poor human... And she has yet to kill- or harm- anyone.
--[x] I guess the family can know that it was Awoo's idea in the first place if they're still hungry for blood.

Youkai in this world doesn't need fear, but acknowledgment. Why do goddesses have to be the only ones that can curry favor with humans? Can't we all get along and drive the Tengu out of this town?
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[x] You can’t deny someone in need, youkai or not. Stop the fight.

Letty is a victim here, and PI isn't the type to kick someone while they're down.

...or, well, not to DEATH, anyway. If you wanna do the right thing, do it, don't make excuses.
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[x] You can’t deny someone in need, youkai or not. Stop the fight.
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[x] Interrupt before the actual extermination. Protecting humans does not mean exterminating Youkai.
-[x] If they inquire more, mention that she was driven here by the Tengu and we are not gonna be their cleaners. She's as much a victim as any poor human... And she has yet to kill- or harm- anyone.
--[x] I guess the family can know that it was Awoo's idea in the first place if they're still hungry for blood.

I think we can send Letty to Lucky's freezer, unlike Cirno who's there against her will, I don't think neither Letty nor Lucky would complain.

In regards to Shizuha I think we can make a show out of the fight, giving Shizuha the popularity boost she needs, without exterminating Letty.
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Just make it bigger and have both of them in there. That's punishment enough for Letty.
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[x] Interrupt before the actual extermination. Protecting humans does not mean exterminating Youkai.
-[x] If they inquire more, mention that she was driven here by the Tengu and we are not gonna be their cleaners. She's as much a victim as any poor human... And she has yet to kill- or harm- anyone.
--[x] I guess the family can know that it was Awoo's idea in the first place if they're still hungry for blood.
I like this option
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I'm going to call it for stopping the fight, with some inspiration from the write-in because it fits.

There are no sidequests in PI's life, just annoyances that happen to be on the side.

>'sides, it's not like Kagerou's gonna send someone to whack her old flame, does she?
Bless your heart.
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> Bless your heart.

...PI won't ever catch a break, I'm guessing?
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i tried
more pi and suwako hijinks please
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no more lonely nights for freezer fairy
Your mind races. You want Shizuha to succeed, but not at the cost of another. Every youkai you’ve injured or killed has been in self-defense, but this snow woman was relatively harmless before you brought Shizuha here. If you were by yourself, it probably wouldn’t have come to this. You could’ve spoken with Okami and quietly found the snow woman a new place of residence. Everything’s messier now that gods are involved. Both groups are victims, but fundamentally opposed to one another. Normally a showy clash like this in the public eye would be a good thing, but if this youkai is too weak, she’s bound to go crazy like the bug did.

You regard the crowd. If the snow woman lost control, there could easily be casualties. Mori and Hina are with you and can help protect them, but all it takes is one surprise to ruin the day. Humans are fragile like that. Unfortunately, an audience is necessary, or else you would drive them away.

The fight continues while you think. The snow woman keeps her distance from Shizuha while slinging round, white bullets, but she can’t seem to muster too many at a time. Shizuha, unsurprisingly, has adopted an aggressive approach and chases the snow woman around, dodging between the scarce waves of bullets and eventually pursuing her into the air. Everyone’s attention turns skyward as Shizuha bursts ahead and closes the distance. The autumn goddess clenches her hands together, arcs backward, and then slams her fists down into the snow woman, knocking the youkai back towards the ground. The snow woman manages to catch herself, but Shizuha already has her next move ready.

“Falling Blast!” she calls out like an action hero. Fitting too, because the attack itself is just like something you’d see on a Saturday morning cartoon. Shizuha raises her hands and glows for a split second before aiming down at the snow woman and releasing a gigantic mass of glowing, red energy that shrinks as it flies toward her. By the time it’s close enough to hit her, the size is small enough to easily dodge — but what the snow woman doesn’t see are the trails of glowing leaves left behind in the attack’s wake. She scrambles to get out of the way, but one catches her in the shoulder. The snow woman screams out, then uses a burst of white mist to clear the field. She stands there, breathing heavily, and holding her shoulder with her other arm. A goddess’s leaf danmaku must not be very pleasant for a youkai to touch.

The crowd cheers, to your surprise. You thought they would still be confused, or at least cautious, but now they’re starting to yell support for Shizuha. Is it natural for humans to spectate these sorts of battles, after all? Even you are watching attentively, despite your concern. This spectacle is certainly different than the life-or-death struggles you’ve been a part of before.

Shizuha continues to perform her new attack, and each time the snow woman struggles to avoid the falling leaves after the initial blast. But, that isn’t all Shizuha has. After a few more attempts, her whole body tenses up and shines with a pale red light as she releases not one, but three huge blasts of energy at once. Gasps erupt in the crowd, and the lights of Shizuha’s attack reflects in their eyes. Even Mister Imaizumi has calmed down and watches Shizuha with something that could possibly be respect.

The snow woman takes a second to find an out — a second too long. By the time her feet move, you can see that she’s already trapped. One leaf hits her, then she falls and desperately covers her head and neck as more leaves bombard her.

You’ve never been hit by danmaku before, since most youkai would rather overpower a human with brute force than waste time with danmaku. By all accounts, it’s more of a spiritual pain — the weakness of any youkai, or goddess. Getting hit means they’re losing — that their opponent’s powers are stronger than they are. Ideally, this would result in the loser forfeiting and leaving.


Shizuha’s feet hit the ground with a heavy thud, before she advances slowly on the recovering snow woman — who trips and falls backward. “Looks like second fiddle’s enough to take care of the likes of you,” Shizuha calls out to her. “Or am I bein’ too cocky, since I’m winnin’ this little fight so much? It’s hard to give ya any kinda respect when you’re scrapin’ yourself off the dirt like that.”

You watch Shizuha approach the snow woman — the red figure standing over the panicked monster. The sight of it takes you back in time, and the two scenes warp and twist around each other in your mind.

“Isn’t it all the same?” the red-haired butcher says, advancing toward the snow woman with her knife. “These youkai writhe and squirm just like humans do, clinging to their existences. I can’t discriminate. It’s why I exist.”

Then her head turns toward you, with a pure smile. “Now watch. Never forget this moment, or else it really will have all been pointless. Remember that this happened because of me, and how much I love you.”


You feel a sharp tug on your wrist, and look down to see Mori holding your hand — keeping it away from your gun. Your eyes meet. Everything snaps back into place.

She lets your hand go, relieved but still concerned. “Are you alright? Maybe you should—”

You rub your hands, and wipe the sweat off on your pants. “I’m fine,” you assure her. “Well, I’m about to be, at any rate.”

Then, you leave her and run out toward Shizuha. “Hey! Don’t you think that’s enough?”

Shizuha stops and turns to face you, bewildered. “Whadd’ya mean, enough? If she’s gonna keep tryin’ to fight, then I gotta keep respondin’ in kind!”

“No,” you respond. “It’s the tengu’s fault she’s here in the first place. What would exterminating her really solve? She’s a victim, too.”

Shizuha frowns as she tries to process this. “Well, yeah, but she’s a youkai. That’s why I gotta fight her.”

While you struggle to placate Shizuha’s one-track mind, one voice rings out clearly over the confused crowd. “What are you doing, you youkai-loving bastard?!” Mister Imaizumi shouts, brandishing his spear. “Let the goddess finish this, or I’ll do it myself!”

With Shizuha halted, now you have to address the increasingly-impatient crowd. “Shizuha Aki fought well. You’ve all witnessed the power that goddesses still have here in Gensokyo. But don’t you all see who the true enemy is here? It’s the tengu!”

You can already see people starting to walk away. You probably aren’t the first decrier of the tengu’s society they’ve heard. It doesn’t matter. The best you could hope for is that they remember Shizuha Aki’s actions, but even that might be a little much for the uncaring masses. There are still some who remain, though they may just be curious to see if Mister Imaizumi gets mad enough to try stabbing you with his spear.

“That’s all a bunch of bullshit!” Mister Imaizumi declares. “I don’t give a damn about some long-nosed bastards at the top of a mountain! I just want this youkai punished, and if this so-called goddess can’t do it, then I—”

“Dad!” Okami shouts. You didn’t notice until now, but she must have eventually followed you off of the roof. Her face is red, and her voice is gushing with the indignant wrath of a teenage girl. “That’s enough! You don’t know anything!”

Of course, Mister Imaizumi can match her daughter’s temper with his own. “You say I don’t know anything? My own brat of a daughter?! How dare you! If I’m so ignorant, then what do you know?”

Okami fidgets, still indignant, but also struggling not to betray her sister’s plans. “I know I, uh, you have no idea where the youkai… came from, and—”

“It was Kagerou,” you announce. “She brought the snow woman here to take shelter in your freezer after the tengu forced her off of the mountain.”

Unlike Okami, you don’t really have any reason to protect Kagerou’s secret. Mister Imaizumi gasps, Missus Imaizumi sighs, and Okami looks hurt. You continue, before they can bombard you with questions. “I’m sure that Kagerou thought it would be better for her to stay here instead of being on the loose, trying to break into random people’s homes. As to why she didn’t discuss this with all of you, it’s likely because she knows that you, Mister Imaizumi, still hold resentment against youkai, and possibly your daughter herself.”

“Of course I hate youkai!” he confirms immediately. However, he hesitates before continuing more quietly. “I could never hate my daughter though.” The mood passes quickly though, as he turns to you with his usual demeanor. “So, I’m sure it was you who put Kagerou up to all this, huh? Just like last time!”

You give Okami a reassuring smile, and she returns it. This is the part where you could selflessly take the blame, so the parents keep trusting at least one of their daughters. Okami would probably keep meeting Kagerou, and everyone would live happily ever after.

Too bad.

“No, Okami is the one who’s been speaking with Kagerou,” you inform them. “She was the one who actually let the youkai in. I had absolutely nothing to do with this.”

Unfortunately for Okami, children need to be punished, because none of this would have happened if she didn’t mindlessly go along with Kagerou’s plan. Even if it’s what you wanted to do in the end, you still hate the fact that you were used. So yes, you will take some petty joy in watching the consequences of her actions play out.

“What the heck?!” she cries. “I thought you understood!”

“I do understand,” you explain. “Your parents were the ones who hired me, not you or Kagerou. I have a duty to inform them exactly what happened, and that is: Kagerou approached you not long ago, asked you to unlock the shed door one night, and instead of consulting anyone about the matter, you did it. And now I’m here, cleaning up the mess.”

“Sh—she said it would work out fine, and it did!” Okami says. “Nobody’s hurt, right? Not even that youkai!”

Thankfully, there’s no room for you to be doubted since Okami’s just admitted it herself. Her father looks stunned. “Okami, I thought you were more honorable than this. Obviously you need more discipline. Go to your room and wait for me and your mother there.”

“My room? Dad, I’m not a kid! You can’t just—”

“You are a child,” her father cuts in sternly. “My child. I failed Kagerou, but I will not fail you. Go.”

Silenced by her father’s heavy words, Okami must instead direct her frustration at you. “My sister was right about you, and I hate it!”

Then she storms off, making it a point to slam the door behind her when she goes inside. It couldn’t have been more stereotypical if she tried.

“Don’t think I like you or anything just because you decided to help us this time,” Mister Imaizumi tells you. “In fact, I don’t want to see you again. If anyone’s gonna fix the problems in my family, it’s going to be me and my wife. You’ve done enough.”

You smile, genuinely. “I agree with you for once.”

Mister Imaizumi nods deeply at you, something almost approaching a bow, then follows his daughter.

Missus Imaizumi, on the other hand, is not so shy, and bows openly. “My husband may not be able to do it, but I will. Thank you, PI. Please, take this.”

She puts some money into your hand. You don’t even count it. “I can’t accept this,” you tell them. “We never even agreed on a price.”

She grins. “Then that’ll just have to be your price, won’t it? You know it won’t do to argue with me.”

You grimace, but then you get an idea.

While all this drama has been going on, Shizuha has been talking with a couple people from the crowd earlier. It seems she’s made an impression, though maybe not as large of one as you were hoping for originally.

You call Shizuha over, and then give the money back to Missus Imaizumi. “That money should go to Shizuha,” you explain. “She’s the one who did most of the work. You have all the proof now that she’s a goddess, right? That payment could be an offering.”

Shizuha’s eyes sparkle. “An offering? Really?”

Missus Imaizumi smiles. “That’s a good idea. Let’s see, how should this go?”

After thinking for a moment, Missus Imaizumi gets on her knees and places the money at Shizuha’s feet. Then she claps her hands together for a quick prayer. “Thank you, Lady Shizuha. Please continue to protect my family with your blessings.”

Shizuha’s face turns tomato-red. “Y, yeah, of course! I’ll do all I can for you folks. Thank you! Or, uh, you’re welcome — graciously! Um.”

Missus Imaizumi laughs, and stands back up. “You know, before she passed, my mother-in-law told me about a harvest festival that was around when she was a child, celebrating the autumn goddesses of Gensokyo. You must have been there.”

Shizuha’s embarrassment becomes a heartfelt smile. “I was, with my sister. And we’re going to start having harvest festivals again. Even if humans aren’t celebrating us anymore, they should still celebrate the season.”

Missus Imaizumi nods. “That’s very noble of the two of you, in these times. Please let me know when you’re planning on having a festival. A lot of us grew up on stories of our parents and grandparents attending festivals and ceremonies dedicated to the gods. I’m sure there are plenty of people who would be willing to experience that.”

Shizuha nods. “Um, yeah! That would be great!”

Before they can go on any longer, you step in. “Shizuha, what are you going to do now?”

She thinks for a moment. “I might go back to the farm and help my sister.” Then she sighs at you. “I should be mad at ya for gettin’ in my way, but the idea of exterminatin’ that snow woman does leave a bad taste in my mouth. I reckon I was gettin’ a little carried away, after all. So, I’ll let you off the hook this time.”

“I’m glad there’s no hard feelings,” you tell her. “ If you or Minoriko need help with anything before the festival, then let Mori and I know. I’m sure she would be happy to help, at least.”

Shizuha laughs and grins. “Alrighty then, I’ll do just that. Catch ya around, PI.”

Missus Imaizumi also bids you farewell with a smile. “So long, PI. I know what my husband said, but don’t be afraid to say hi.”

You chuckle before turning to leave. “I’ll try.”

Then, she turns back to Shizuha. “You said you had a farm? I haven’t been to a farm in ages. I thought the kappa owned most of the farmland nowadays?”

“They do,” Shizuha answers, “but this is somethin’ small my sister and I are doin’ just for the festival…”

Content that Shizuha will be fine, you slink away. The crowd has pretty much dispersed. There’s been no sign of tengu, that you can tell. If they aren’t here by now, then they probably won’t be. Such a short, contained fight in this part of the city probably isn’t worth any screentime.

No sign of the snow woman, or Hina and Mori. That is, until Mori peeks out at you from behind the Imaizumi’s shed. “Over here,” she calls to you, in a hushed manner.

You wander that way and are surprised to see the injured snow woman sitting against the back of the shed, with a pleasant-as-always Hina looming over her.

“She wanted to run after you interrupted, but I thought we should stop her so you could talk with her,” Mori explains. “Hina caught her pretty quick while you guys were distracted.”

The snow woman glances up at you, then away. “Just my luck. That goddess was tough, but these two friends of yours are way stronger. I can’t tell if you want to help me, or if I’m in even deeper trouble.”

You place your hand on Hina’s shoulder. “You did a good job, Hina. I can take it from here.”

Hina steps away with a warm smile. “Like always, I am honored to make myself useful.”

It’s a little embarrassing to rely on Hina so much, but she’s so strong and helpful that it’s become a necessity when dealing with these youkai.

But now, you don’t think this one has any fight left in her. You offer the snow woman your hand. “I meant what I said back there. I want to help you, if you’re willing to cooperate.”

She looks at your hand warily. “A human, offering his hand to me? It’s been so long. I suppose I don’t have much of a choice, do I?”

Her pale hand reaches for yours and grab it, and immediately you’re startled by how cool — and soft — her hand is. You gently pull her up, off the ground. Her hand lingers on yours for a moment before she lets go. “Very well,” she continues, “what’s your plan?”

You start thinking, but then you’re reminded of the bug youkai. All this time, you were content with saying “bug youkai” and “snow woman.” Maybe it’s time to change that.

“First,” you say, “do you have a name?”

She blinks a few times, and then smiles. “It’s Letty. Letty Whiterock.”


Lucky’s “underground” bar is empty — just the way you like it. Even though it feels like it’s been a long time since you were here last, not one thing has changed: the bar, the stools, the booze, and the smell of old wood. It’s almost a nostalgic feeling — like no matter what happens, you can always come here to drink it away. Even though you came here on business, you’ll have to have a drink as well. Maybe a few.

“Good evening to you, Lucky!” you call toward the giant behind the bar counter. You’re barging in with a party of four and no reservation, but that won’t surprise him any. He’s always knows when to expect you, after all.

Or at least, that’s what you thought. He reacts normally enough to you, Mori, and Hina — that is, not much — but when his dull eyes pass over Letty Whiterock, you see them widen with surprise for the very first time. “He didn’t kill you?” he utters in pure disbelief.

You and Letty exchange confused looks, before you reply. “No, I didn’t. Are you alright?”

However, Lucky quickly collects himself. “Don’t worry about it. Double vision. Haven’t been getting much sleep lately.”

You’ve never heard Lucky use the term “double vision” before, or use lack of sleep as an excuse for anything. Nevertheless, pressing him about it would be fruitless. When he clams up, it would take the strength of another oni to pry him open. Not to mention, you’d rather not impose on one of the few people who can come close to being called a friend. “If you aren’t feeling well,” you tell him, “then we can come back another night.”

But he’s already getting out drinks and putting them on the counter. “I told you to forget it. Sit down and drink, all of you.”

Mori perks up. “Even me?”

“Even you, goddess.”


You take a seat on one of the center stools. Mori and Hina sit on either side of you — the former with a newfound energy. Letty sits next to Hina, a little hesitantly.

Lucky takes the initiative and sets out mugs and smaller glasses in front of everyone. Looks like he’s expecting some heavy drinking — and far be it from you to disappoint an oni. But while he does that, you have to address something. “You knew about Mori?”

“I know you were about to tell me,” he answers, not looking up from his work. “I’m not surprised.”

There’s the Lucky you know.

“So, an oni running a bar, huh?” Letty speaks up. “I never thought I’d see something like this, even in today’s Gensokyo.”

“Nor would I expect such a beautiful snow woman appearing before me a couple months shy of winter,” Lucky responds dryly, without missing a beat.

You double-take. Did he just hit on her?

Letty turns a shade of pink. “There were circumstances,” she answers, moving the conversation along.

“Tengu,” Lucky says, looking over his collection of spirits. “I know. They drove you out, you tried fiding a new shelter, eventually a werewolf got involved, and finally this guy. He ended up saving you, even though he’s part of the reason why you were in that kind of situation in the first place.”

Letty looks at him, completely at a loss for words as she tries to comprehend what’s going on.

Meanwhile, Lucky opens the freezer. A wave of chill creeps out, and you can spot the distinct blue dress and ice wings of the fairy inside. “Ice,” is his simple, yet heavy command.

“I’m workin’ on it!” she cries. “It’s not like I knew they were coming. I’m no protagonist like you are!”

“Prognosticator,” he corrects her.

You hear the clinking of ice as Lucky receives a mug filled with ice cubes. He immediately shuts the door, and then drops a few cubes in Letty’s glass. After pouring some whiskey over them, he sets it down in front of her. “Whiskey on the rocks, by your request.”

It’s amusing to watch the gears in Letty’s hard turn as Lucky indulges himself a little bit. If everything that happened today weren’t enough for her, now Letty’s meeting Lucky for the first time. You remember how things almost turned violent when you first met the oni, because you were convinced he was some kind of spy. Let’s just say that if Lucky had been anything like the oni you heard about in stories, you wouldn’t be anything but a stain on the wood today.

Finally, Letty speaks, even though it’s obvious she doesn’t believe what she’s about to say. “You’re psychic? A psychic oni?”

Lucky shakes his head. “Not really. Just a few seconds of foresight. Enough to know what people are going to tell me right before they actually do. Enough to see a punch coming and react. Pretty much useless besides that though.”

“Hence his attitude,” you add. “Nothing can faze him. Or uh, almost nothing. Did you really hit on her earlier?”

Lucky tilts his head and thinks. “No, I don’t want to hurt her.” He pauses before continuing. “This is another one of those expressions your kind uses. Hold on.” He reaches for the small notepad he makes notes in about above-ground culture. “Go on.”

“To hit on someone,” you explain, “means to charm them in an attempt to pursue a relationship, usually one of a physical nature.”

Lucky finishes scribbling but doesn’t set the notepad back down yet. “Got it. Though, I’m wondering what I said that would make you think such a thing.”

“I believe it was when you referred to her as beautiful,” Hina speaks up. “I understand the confusion well, Master. Simple facts are considered to have some sort of hidden implication.”

Letty’s blush flares up again. “W, why is me being beautiful a simple fact now? I don’t appreciate being made fun of, I’ll have you know.”

She isn’t really your type, but you can appreciate what she has: a mature aura, a pretty face, and last but not least — a nice pair of breasts. You’re a little bit more concerned about something else, though.

“Hold on,” you cut in, directing your words toward Hina. “Why is Lucky your master, now? I didn’t even know you two knew each other.”

“I arm-wrestle with him occasionally,” she explains as if it were a normal thing. “One of my aspirations is to defeat him one day.”

“Steady progress, Hina,” Lucky remarks.

Hina nods enthusiastically. “Yes, Master!”

You’ll have to leave that conversation for later, because things are already going off the rails. “Before we start drinking,” you say to Lucky, “I wanted to ask you something.”

Lucky stops and stares at you. “I don’t mind.”

You aren’t sure how much he’s seen. “You mean you don’t mind me asking, or—”

“I don’t mind her staying here,” Lucky clarifies. “I was planning on getting a bigger freezer, anyway.”

Letty nearly chokes on her whiskey — which is almost half-gone, already. “Just like that?”

Lucky nods. “The fairy might bother you, but I’ll let her know not to cause any problems.”

Then he walks over to the freezer and opens it. “You’re going to have a roommate,” he informs her. “If you don’t treat her with respect then I’ll tear your head off.”

The fairy — Cirno, you think it was — actually pokes her head out of the freezer to see just what the hell is going on. “A rommmate? What do y—”

“Cirno?” Letty says, eyeing the ice fairy with disbelief. “Is that really you?”

She must not have noticed Cirno before because she was so confused. The freezer fairy floats out of the freezer — without her leash, you notice — and looks at Letty closely. “Um, yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m still Cirno, the strongest fairy. Who are you?”

Letty stares at Cirno a moment, and then reaches out and grabs her, pulling her into a tight embrace. “Oh, I never thought I would be so happy to see you! I thought you vanished a long time ago!”

Cirno squirms around in Letty’s grasp. “No, I’m — ugh — still here, so uh, let go, old lady!”

You notice that Letty squeezes Cirno even tighter and begins stroking her blue head like a cat’s — whose struggles are in vain. “Like I was saying,” Letty continues, “I think I’ll be just fine if Cirno’s here.”

Like you thought, Cirno and Letty would be quite compatible with each other. If Letty relies on Cirno’s cold body, she should be comfortable enough staying here until winter. “Don’t think it’ll be for free though,” you remind her. “Lucky, you can probably find something for her to do, right?”

“I’ll train her to be a bartender,” he answers. “That way she can cover for me while I’m out.”

“I sleep a lot,” she says, “but I wouldn’t mind that, as long as you don’t take my little ice pack with you.”

Not that Lucky would miss much business if he left for a while, but whatever. As long as Letty can make herself useful somehow, it’s all the same to you.

“Just don’t put a leash on this one,” Mori remarks, “unless you both are into that kind of thing.”

Letty’s distracted by a fussing Cirno, but Lucky cocks an eyebrow at her. “Into what kind of thing?” he responds cluelessly.

Before he can reach for the notepad, you stop him. “Don’t even bother. It was a bad joke.”

Mori clicks her tongue. “You’re just jealous I said it first.”

The oni shrugs. “Whatever you say.”


You drink fast and hard to try and keep up with your non-human companions, and as a result the rest of the night goes by in a blur. Lucky and Hina give a display of arm wrestling. Letty talks about why she loves whiskey: the contrast between the cold drink and the warm feeling. About Mori, you don’t notice much; she’s actually been pretty quiet recently. Whenever your eyes meet, though, she smiles like nothing’s wrong, and cracks some lame joke.

Eventually, the ceiling feels like it’s going to fall on top of you, and you stumble outside for some air. Your apartment isn’t far away, so you try walking. By the time you start, you forget why, and mindlessly keep following your tunnel vision wherever it takes you.

It leads you into a wall.

“Dammit,” you mutter. “Fuckin’ walls. This whole damn city’s a bunch of walls, or something.”

You lose track of whatever insightful bullshit you were about to spout and try to stand up.

Then you fall back down.

Everything’s black for a bit. You feel your consciousness fading away, but at the last moment, someone’s voice pulls you back.

[] It’s Hina, who couldn’t be happier to see you, for some reason.

[] It’s Mori, who seems just as drunk as you are — and a little peeved.

[] Hatate? What are you doing outside?

[] Who else but your loving wife?
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[x] Who else but your loving wife?

what could possibly go wrong
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[x] It’s Hina, who couldn’t be happier to see you, for some reason.

Only Hina.

Anyway, was her training to be an arm wrestling champion a side thing that we missed or a masterful reminder that everyone has lives that we don't know anything about?

Also, looking forward to his dreaded, but inevitable, meeting with Awoo 2.0.
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[X] Who else but your loving wife?

I gotta say, that little fight ended better than I expected.

Now, though, is time for some lovey-dovey hubby wifey timey.
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That looks great! It might be because I watched so much House while it was airing, but I'm getting some Hugh Laurie vibes, which is fine by me.

One of the problems I have is that I'll write out dialogue or even entire scenes and then end up revising or cutting it out entirely before I actually post it. So, I end up forgetting what makes it into the story or not. Hina's enthusiasm for arm wrestling is one of those things I wrote up a long time ago but I'm pretty sure was cut out entirely. There's also a lot about Lucky I've cut out while writing this story, so this update in particular was a bit of a chore — looking through all the threads for certain phrases.

This is another reason why I really need to update those files.
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[x] It’s Hina, who couldn’t be happier to see you, for some reason.

i summon the power of tunnel vision
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[x] It’s Hina, who couldn’t be happier to see you, for some reason.
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[X] Who else but your loving wife?
That route sounds more interesting.
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[] Who else but your loving wife?
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[X] Who else but your loving wife?
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[X] It’s Mori, who seems just as drunk as you are — and a little peeved.

Never not Mori.
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> I'm getting some Hugh Laurie vibes

"PI, help! There's a snow woman in my-"
"-icebox wait what?"
"Probably Lupus."
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[X] It’s Mori, who seems just as drunk as you are — and a little peeved.

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> Kotohime has more votes than Hina

Oh no you don't!

[x] It's Hina, who couldn’t be happier to see you, for some reason.
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I'm a Suwako fan, but I'd rather have Hina than Ms Murder...

[X] Hina

But do let me know if you want to go for best goddess instead!
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I mean, I like Hina and all, but Kotohime's PLOT is super intriguing, y'know?
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[X] It’s Hina, who couldn’t be happier to see you, for some reason.
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Give up, you can't win against the power of waifus.
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[X] Who else but your loving wife?

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[X] Who else but your loving wife?

Not if I can help it!
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Only 2 votes for froggy.
I'm sorry Suwako-Sama...

No voice for crowbutt too. Not big surprise.
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[x] Who else but your loving wife?

tbh I want to vote for crowbutt but there's no way she wins
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[X] Who else but your loving wife, Mori?

I wanna go for Suwako, but I'd rather have the red one then Hina.

[X] Who else but your loving wife?
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[x] It’s Hina, who couldn’t be happier to see you, for some reason.

I love your Hina. She's so weird, it's great.
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[x] It’s Hina, who couldn’t be happier to see you, for some reason.

Ignoring the wife is good. This is so meta!
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[X] Who else but your loving wife?

Like a proper PI, I want to see where this leads to.
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Wow, that's one way to finish off a thread. It was a valiant effort from the Hinanons, but I'm officially calling it for PI having a chat with his wife.

This is where I would say "Isn't it sad, Hatate?", but she'll be getting her own little time in the spotlight soon.
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Will giving attention to the thing that literally feeds on attention have consequences on the plot?

I mean, I know it will-and that they will be negative-I just want your confirmation to be smug.
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For every anon who calls them consequences, there will be one who calls them benefits.
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Well yeah. I can't be right if there aren't others who are wrong.

Also, how about some cupcakes, Raftclans?
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I'll see your cupcakes and raise you a nice steaming loaf of an update.

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