No. 14581
It's that time of the year again, and love is in the air! To celebrate, let's focus on the bad part! Yes, that's right: rejection, failed confessions and all things bad about Valentin's Day!
Now, the rules of the contest shall be rather simple: no holds barred, as many entries as you like, and let's see if we can have a better voter turnout than last time! Ohh, and entries should be anonymous. I'm likely going to toy with other options next contest, but, as things currently are, we're going anonymous again!
Deadline is still up in the air. It shall be one of two dates: either February 14th 00:01, or February 28th 00:01. In the end, I took the feedback on monthly contests into account, and we shall be having one every other month, with a month to vote, give or take. As of right now, start your engines, but we need to discuss when to end the contest on.
Voting shall, of course, end on March 31st 00:01. I felt that the winter contest was too short, and at least one person didn't make it in time to vote. As such, I figure that if I just say screw it and make the entirety of the time between contests a voting period, we shall get more!
Categories shall be Lewd, Normal and Lunatic Soul-crushingly Depressing! The first two shall be the main distinction, but the third applies to both categories! I figure I'd test an idea I had. Each contest will have a flavor category to liven things up. I noticed the fun that was had in the yearly contest from the Shitpost category, and figure that it might be interesting to try something of the like, if different.
Anywho, the categories shall be up as soon as I have images, then I'll link them to here in the next post. Annoying delay does get in the way a bit, though.
Expand all images >> No. 14582
>>/at/38137 Lewd.
>>/shorts/2058 Not quite so lewd.
Sorry it took so long. It's easier to just wait than try to send and send for an indeterminate amount of time.
>> No. 14587
>>14583That should be fine. For example, a girl rejected by a thousand suitors yet accepted by one is allowed. Likewise, you can play any spin on it you like. If you feel it counts under it, it counts under it. The voters are the true judge, however.
>>14586Yup. That's what I was considering. The main reason I considered Valentine's was that, well, it's the inspiration for it.
...Not to mention why I started it a week early — I realized I should ask.
>> No. 14668 What? No votes yet? For shame... Been nearly a week. Anywho, I'll go ahead and vote following standard policy: the less lewd options and not my own.
Broken Heart
A lot of notice me senpai going on here, along with leaning on the fourth wall. Stream of consciousness works well for Koishi. Was amused enough at the vanity shown, and the reversal of tone towards the end worked well.
I'd almost say it needs to be longer, but the brevity does keep it from becoming stale. Perhaps adding in just enough of Satori's reaction to make the reader wonder whether she's purposefully ignoring Koishi, before the direct and rather blatant imagery of Satori not being able to see her sister? Just a thought. Nice, short little ditty.
Light Hearted
...Odd story; makes me more curious about what this particular Layla is like. Innocent projections that she didn't understand made manifest in magic, or did she know perfectly well what she was doing. Do get the sense of weathered resilience for Lunasa's sake, having to deal with this day in and day out. Although, is Merlin the one here who is actually starting to grow out of the sense of simply being?
Oh, and puns. we musn't forget the puns. Those did make it. Light-hearted verse did help counterbalance your message of being off, and how thye're basically echos. Not even allowed to think for themselves, they simply act out the same game as people long dead once did. Wouldn't call this one soul-crushing, just makes you about pity them; they're just a recording playing on loop for day after day.
Little typo towards the center; although the thought of Merlin driving someone to be a maid with her dashing looks or blaring horn was funny. (I'll leave the choice of whether a french maid or old maid up to you)
Self, Love, Family
Hrm. Interesting perspective. Protag definitely is quite unobservant; the message here seems to be ignorance and willful blindness from those that presume to know everything. Or, perhaps, even a "what-if" about a self-insert that doesn't join the story?
Either way, sounds more like Sanae and Suwako were just trying to reunite family, perhaps? He's certainly not the remainder of the family. Perhaps it was just an obligation she was trying to fulfill. Lots of interesting questions that make me want to see their side.
Margatroid disapproves of him: way too many assumptions.
Ye Olde English Nameless Story
The style is great, although I did have to explore to try and unravel a meaning. An unmarried woman whom the reader did observe and desire, finding her unapproachable, and secretly dreamt of her. Star-crossed fate never let them come together, though the sight of her seemed to tug at his own purpose? The question at the end... "Hire" in the fourth verse means reward, does it not? She went to her eternal reward on that cliff? ...With the next few lines...
He was either afraid to lose her but in the end did lose his chance, and could only watch as she left him behind. She might have committed suicide. She might have married and gone on. Or... well, what I think is most likely was that he was afraid to lose her to someone else, so he bled "the" (her) heart himself so that no one else could have it. And then, in treste (in trust; secret?), he planted a lilac where he buried her. As, indeed, she did go home. Hang down your head, Tom Dooley.
Or... time holding a quicker pace on his eyes. I suppose we might also be a youkai, watching a human blossom, and the two are separate. The same situation could apply; he watches her from afar, never able to meet, until she finally whiethers away, and he only cherishes the memory. Or, in order to preserve the beauty, it is bled in its prime?
...Hrm. Planted lilac on a body. Is this a Yuyuko that we're observing?
Gonna give my best shot at translating that. ...Irish, I guess? Maybe old Gaelic. "Fear of reason writes the death of the flower?" Doesn't quite seem correct. "Fear writes the death of the flower."
Whatever the meaning, is good. Just hope that it can be confirmed. (and I'm not too far off base)
Straight to the Point
Title says it all.
Good shitpost, I raise you another
You thought this was a review? But it was me, Dio!
Lost from Home
This is a good, sweet story. Kogasa's portrayal was funny and was presented well. Took me a moment to realize that she was the viewpoint character. The smugness and certainty that she was correct did build up her childish nature very well, along with the certainty that she had done no wrong. Keine should be commended for having the patience to deal with her, although I have a feeling that the umbrella actually wasn't kicked out of a temple. Kogasa couldn't stand their pitying looks and the lack of surprise and left (not because she didn't like them). The conversation with Keine is one that certainly seems to have happened a lot; she definitely can read her just like a book.
The story within the story also is executed well; it sounds like a tale told to a child; there are just enough details to get the picture, but one has to wonder more about the interaction between Hieda and Kei(ne). I wonder how many years must have passed in this world and how long she did end up serving them. Good to see a story with a happy ending.
And Kogasa goes right back to being frustrated about being too adorable to the humans. Cute. Keine knows best, though. Good, complete story that is well-rounded.
The Thoughtful Seeking Gatekeeper
Starts out interesting; sounds like an old Aesop, about the dutiful being tempted by their desires, and whether to seek out what she wants or remain on station. And, slowly, the stranger asks enough questions to make her change her mind and realize that the mistress isn't coming back.
And at the end, Yuuka seems to have been trolling her all along. Poor Elly. Aesop broke immediately, and instead of being patient and waiting in her duty, she is now on a quest to find a master she doesn't even recognize.
Eternal Fleeting Strain
I like this story. It has a good pace to it, and the interaction between Layla and Benben is good. It doesn't waste time trying to set up, but immediately moves into the action. Yatsuhashi's annoyance and confusion does fit in.
Although, one thing that I do have to wonder about: what happens to Layla? (I guess this is left up to the reader to decide). Is it that she vanishes whenever the Prismrivers leave the Netherworld? "I was running away that day". Maybe she's always present, but she can't actually speak to them. So, she finds a messenger with which she can relate, so Benben can pass on her melody. Or is she just that memory, appearing for just that reason.
I did like the imagery of the biwa falling to really drive it in. She never was really there. A ghost amongst geists, indeed.
What That Dances in the Lea Can't do my own
Votes
Now that I'm done pontificating, let me finish.
Overall Pick: [x] Eternal Fleeting Strain
I considered Lost from Home as well, as that story was the most complete of them all, but this one left me wanting to know what happens next the most. That pushed me into supporting it.
Soul Crushing Flavor Category: [x] The Thoughtful Seeking Gatekeeper
Considered Ye Olde English Nameless Story, but the meaning isn't quite clear enough for me to cast a vote for it. Yuuka twisting the knife defintely jerks and changes the whole tone at the last minute.
Many good entries here, though; actually had to think a while to decide!
>> No. 14671 For reasons that I think certain people would understand if I'd explain them if not apparent already, I will only judge a few of the entries. This isn't to say I didn't like the works that go unjudged. It's because of the reasons I will not state. I think it is a logical, ethical decision not to.
My voting and judgement is based on the degree of emotion inherent in the rejection. Considering the theme of the contest, the best story as a whole must make me say: "Yeah, this one works as a story about rejection, of failed confessions or failed love." Some stories held feelings of longing, but I understand the prescence of thinking "Well, it wouldn't work" if given reason or implication to believe a confession would be rejected.
Self, Love, Family
Right off the bat. An answer without the question involved. Good, because the shorter a story is, the less room you have to write with some degree of redundancy. Though saying this, this means that you could have gone without some of the narrative due to the dialogue being the main focus of plot development and charaterization. I would go so far as to argue why the reporter is necessary to describe, unless she had a role in the story itself. Which she didn't appear to, based on the last narrative paragraph. And even if she did, it detracts from the more important part of the story.
Which is, the man and his introspection of his past with Sanae.
I think the thriving part of the story, in relation to the contest's theme, is the man's reasoning for noticing Sanae at all. He mentions feeling "something". A "connection". I'm disregarding most of the twist line at the end of the story. Not that it's unimportant, but when reading this work, inspecting it, then looking at it as a whole, I'm more focused on the man's feelings for Sanae. Most of the last line gives us information on the character. But his dialogue and his thoughts on his past establishes his character and drives the tension inside of him. Yes, he's a successful man. And to achieve his success, he had to be (not perfect, but) excellent. And to be excellent, he had to overcome and solve problems that came up in his life. We know this, because he talks about how he plans and acts accordingly to put himself in good positions. Comfortable, I might say.
But then there's Sanae. And she catches the attention and notice of this man, even after a long time has passed since he's seen her. She caught the attention of this man, who viewed people as leeches and didn't take charms on the basis that he had so much confidence in his own methods of success. And he rejected her. And now he's second guessing himself.
I think it's an interesting flip of expectation on who is feeling negatively about a rejection or a failed confession. The feeling of regret. Regret, the word used at the end of the story. I think his relation to the Moriya family could be cut out and it'd still be fine. Not that I would. That's just how high I recognize the man's feeling of regret and the work as a whole as a short story of regret. Added sympathy for the man because it's a short story about a long period of his life that the man remembered Sanae and felt regret at all.
I'll say that this story does succeed at the expectations of the contest. There is a bit of uncertainty as to the technical look of the story, but the plot itself comes out entirely fine.
(untitled story)
Whether or not it's a conscious decision, I think a choice of language shows much of a character and setting. In this case, in terms of time period (of which a character belongs) and place of origin. This, in turn, feeds into the identity of said character, which is always important when an original character is involved. And last, when using an original character, their importance and role in the plot is substantial. All the more complex when using poem instead of prose, where each and every word must feed into the direct creation of or the story itself. (Unless, surprise, it's not an original character, but that's never made explicit. I assume it is only because of the line: "Whan tyme helde a quicker pace on mine eyes." I read this as seeing the character as someone who will be unable to live with his adoration mortally.)
But what does knowing this do for the story itself? I suppose this confused me. If there's some connection I'm not seeing, I'd like to know. I understand that it may relate the characters, but what I'm asking is what it does for the plot, and by nature, the theme of the contest. I'll expand on this later below.
Before moving on. I am not the most well-versed in vocabulary, but I believe it's a voter and reader's duty to try and decipher meaning for better understanding if they really want to judge a work. I also am sad because I wanted to write a work about the mentioned Touhou woman and didn't get to.
The key words in this work are: Lylack, Spring, and words relevant to the image of a flower. For obvious reasons. As such, the admiration of these key words and concepts emphasizes and strengthens the adoration of the speaker. Why? Because if the speaker mentioned that he could bear for "it" to parish, or that he felt or expressed resentment for the woman's lack of attention toward them, the work would have a much different atmosphere. And so it follows that the speaker performs the act of preservation. His love for the subject of his adoration is there.
How strong is the theme of rejection in the work itself? Not too strong. The story opens with the speaker's observations, and closes with their dedication to the target of their observations. Yes, the speaker does mention their lower degree of status and their shyness around their love. I can't ask for modifications or something that isn't in the work, but I say that these mentions imply a lack of action. I understand that it's the character of the speaker. Because of their shyness, there's not really a rejection if we're judging on this factor. There's the sense that a rejection would be inevitable. But the sorrow the work attempts to place in the reader stems from the idea that the love is unattainable. Not from a rejection or a failed confession. Is it a failed love? To a very high degree, yes. But on the fear of rejection and a failed confession that is only mental, the scale of rejection and failure in general is around moderate. I think if this scale was to be improved in someway, it would involve the choice of language in the story.
This was a decisive matter. Especially so when given a seperated line break to a one-liner in that language that is pivotal to the work. The climax. The turning point. The "ah-ha" moment, if giving another example. What does it make the reader feel? To me, after deciphering the phrase, the line asks for sympathy from the reader to the speaker. In addition, the use of imagery and verbal actions in the written language does very well in establishing character and the dilemma in the work. But if we're looking for the theme of the contest, it's not so strong in that regard. As I said, I believe the language establishes the setting, identity, and origin of a character. That means these three things can strengthen and bring to life the theme of this contest in the work. I can't explain it generally, but can give a hypothetical example. Perhaps it's disrespectful in the speaker's culture to approach a woman and confess directly. Or at all. Yes, the speaker held fear and shied away from confrontation anyway. But maybe the speaker thought, as they often did to themselves in this work, of ways to make their love apparent, but couldn't because of their own personality. Perhaps he's the one rejecting her. (And if he was, that'd be a shocker.)
It's difficult to force the contest's themes in this work due to how it was written. It's not a bad piece. It's just not the strongest in this contest's theme.
Straight to the Point
I'll say that it was better suited to the contest's tastes than the shitpost below it. But this story and the one following it do speak for themselves. In more ways than one.
My general vote: [X] Lost From Home
A post above explained that it was the most complete of the entries. I do agree on this point. I'd like to add that it also has advantage in length, as well. True, not all long stories are good. But the reason I voted for this work is most in part because of the sympathy both characters are allowed to give each other. And taking the time to write out this exchange is a large factor in its effectiveness.
In a sense, every detail gives itself to a bigger part, which ends up making a whole. To explain, in the beginning we have Kogasa speaking of her leaving the temple to Keine. The dialogue and verbal exchange between them compliment the sympathy the reader has for Kogasa, who feels somewhat offended when Keine believes they kicked her out. Considering the character Kogasa displays in this work, she can't really be blamed for feeling offended. It's really "a load of crap", in her eyes.
Then, Keine goes on to tell her story. A very fairy tale like narrative, that gets its point across in a complicated, simple way. The reader has to keep in mind why Keine's telling the story in the first place: She's trying to comfort Kogasa. Why? Based on the conversation beforehand. So everything from when the youkai tries to explain itself to the children, to the exchange between the young woman and Hieda, and to Keine's reveal of who Kei really was, it's all from Keine's consideration of Kogasa. I was a little unsatisfied as to how Hieda was essentially used as a plot device. I mean, she's a plot device in a plot device of Keine's story. But it's the writer's personal choice, and I can't ask for anything that's not in the work, so I understand.
Rejection? Well, if we're considering where the love is and who was rejected, it reeks of it everywhere in the story. I'm not voting for it just because of the redemption and kip up from the rejection on both fronts of Kogasa and Keine. As I said earlier, I voted for it largely because of Keine's sympathy toward Kogasa's situation, and then Kogasa's subsequent sympathy towards a very obvious, but a well done trade of emotion that allows Kogasa to get back into her life. Could it be better? Of course. But of all the entries current, this is the one that stands out for the contest the most.
Soul-crushingly Depressing: (untitled story)
I didn't quite get any stronger vibes from the other entries, so I'll go with the one I mentioned before. Although it's not a rejection, it does invoke more sadness towards depression than any of the other entries. Why? Because the hope in that story ends with the speaker's last act of preservation. This is more depressing in comparison to the other entries, where the rejections and failed loves have a more closed or promise of a completed end.
>> No. 14687
[x] Normal: Koga&Kei story.
[x] SCD: Autnum dancing story.
>>/shorts/2059 Broken Heart
A classic and exactly what one would expect for this kind of contest. Efficient and simple. Doom's shotgun or Honda Civic.
>>/shorts/2072 Light Hearted
Good, but not my cup of tea. That said, I'm left wondering how much of that lighthearted attitude is a shield. Which I guess was the point. Mitsubishi Express.
>>/shorts/2100 Self, Love, Family
Ah, regret. The poison that hurts the most those who live their lives escaping from pain. Short and cheap but surprisingly impactful. The Mercy's handgun of the contest. Or Corvette, if you want to keep the car motif.
>>/shorts/2102 Ye Olde English Nameless Story
Google translate tells me something about trees. Pass.
>>/shorts/2103 Straight to the Point
>>/shorts/2104 Good shitpost, I raise you another.
Shitposts. Of course. You can't have a contest without them. Maybe we should have a contest
about them? LOW EFFORT CONTEST WHEN??
The "fratboy that drinks way too much" of this contest. M3 E36.
>>/shorts/2105 Lost from Home
While the theme of reject was weaker than some of other stories, the plot itself was engaging and the narration was flawless. I want to see a story about Kogasa turning into the village's only youkai blacksmith and trying to fit in while battling raising rent costs and racism.
Too bad the 'game cyoa' slot was taken by another story. Then again, TT is shaping up to be a good one so, yay? Porsche 911.
>>/shorts/2106 The Thoughtful Seeking Gatekeeper
I didn't get the aesop part of this story so it seemed lackluster to me. Thankfully, there are people who know more about stuff that can correct the record (tm) Hilux.
>>/shorts/2107 Eternal Fleeting Strain
Heartwarming, with a weird pacing but a good plot. It doesn't seem to fit the topic at first but I guess self rejection is its own type of torture. Accura RDX.
>>/shorts/2108 What That Dances in the Leaves
Sometimes, effort isn't enough and unfulfilled dreams turn into anchors that drag you down forever.
Not sure if that was the intention but it definitely is the result. Eclipse.
>> No. 14689
Lewd
[XXX] Boundary In Queried Affection - Well, that's about as depressing as porn can get without rape and torture. Liked the theme, and it was an interesting twist on what you expect of an oni. Seems reasonable, too. They're honest, after all.
[ ] something horrible - Way to subvert my sexpectatations! ...That was a typo, but I guess it fits well enough. As for the rest, I enjoyed the overkill amount of, well... more or less everything. The room spattered with cum, Faceless Man's twelve inches, not to mention other things. Were this a comedy contest, it'd certainly get my vote for lewd.
SFW
[ ] Self, Love, Family - The title could have been a good one for a lewd, if you made a small shift in punctuation. With that bad joke out of the way, I feel it was a bit short. It felt as if it had ideas, but didn't put them to paper. As if the cutting room floor contains the majority of a story, so to speak. It felt like he didn't care — like he never cared or regretted it — but was pressed to give those details. The story is less tragic for him, and more tragic for her. Heck, even using tragic seems a bit much. He more so just sounded like an ass to me.
[ ]Theory Crafting: The Story - Not often do I struggle with a story. Between the spellings of olde, not to mention the difficulty in truly figuring out the meaning, I'll go reread it.
Okay, where to start... I guess I'll say that a lot of the words I could only guess at. No, I did not research them in particular. The difficulty of understanding honestly made the story what it was. Whoever this is, there is no doubt that they are old indeed. They speak a tongue most ancient, in that it is a dated way of speaking. This, in turn, assures one of the character's age. At first I guessed that they spoke of Lily White, but that didn't seem right. No, I don't think she was a Touhou at all, but a human. A human that died before her time, by way of falling from a great height. It spoke of hearts bleeding and standing atop a cliff, so this is my best guess. Still, regardless of my confusion — not to mention the line I simply couldn't read — I liked it.
[ ] Straight to the Point - Gay. Think I know who you are, though. It's odd that there wasn't much focus on this potential plot direction in other stories.
[ ] Good shitpost, I raise you another. - Heh. Way to make the title a sentence...
[X] Lost from Home - Well, that was quite a story. Kogasa reminded me of a certain Rumia, actually. Still, that was quite the interesting little story, ignoring that the story itself was rather large when compared to the story she told. I enjoyed this Kogasa. Always saying things that just make you want to pinch her cheek, isn't she? As small as Kein— I mean Kei's story was, it was quite the nice little thing, wasn't it? I actually teared up on this one, which says a lot about how I felt about it... If only I knew what happened to this "Kei"...
[ ] The Thoughtful Seeking Gatekeeper - Saw that ending coming a mile away. Probably started thinking about this by the second visit, but loved it for it all the same. Probably my favorite as a story, or at least thus far. Still have a couple to look over, but it's not every day you have PC-98 getting some love. Always been fond of those characters, though I'm not too sure why. Perhaps because they are so rare that writing a story involving them is special? Elly is one of the better ones, too. Rather lovely design. Only reason I'm not voting for you is that is that she left. Had she never left, it would likely have won my Soul Crushingly Depressing vote.
[ ] Eternal Fleeting Strain - Six of my favorite characters... The Prismrivers always are funny to see used. No two interpretations are truly alike. However, the interesting thing is how little you told and how much it told for you. You didn't have to say much, and yet so much can be interpreted and assumed from it all. It wasn't my favorite, but it did hit the mark of the contest's theme, if you ask me. However, so too did others. You are certainly one of my favorite stories of the contest.
[SCD] What That Dances in the Lea - I will meet you in the end, indeed. But which end is that? And whose? Hers? That of all? Seems I have my choice for Soul Crushingly Depressing. It's fitting that it's here, at the very end. The meaning of many words didn't quite strike home, but the message still came through well. It's like a groundhog day of sorts, but in the worst way. You don't go back, but they die. Just imagining seeing that again and again... That she denies herself interaction again and again... He must have been special to her, indeed.
>> No. 14693>>14692Actually, that's a gothic princess mermaid.
Sadly, without the rest of the
harem. How TRAGIC.
>> No. 14730
Vanilla
Six voters and twelve entries? Not bad at all!
[3] Lost From Home
[1] Eternal Fleeting Strain
[1] What That Dances in the Leas
[1] Self, Love, Family
Half the votes for a single story? I feel that says a lot about its quality.
Soul-crushingly Depressingly
Some people sadly skipped over this category. As such, it was rather close, but thankfully not a huge tie like that one time.
Because that really sucked.
[2] What That Dances in the Leas
[1] (untitled story)
[1] The Thoughtful Seeking Gatekeeper
Lewd
One vote. By me. For the one post that wasn't a shitpost.
Boundary In Queried Affection is the undisputed depressing Touhou porn world champion!
I'm starting to understand why people stopped adding lewd categories to contests, but it was necessary to learn this myself! Still, the stories entered into the contest at least make it worth it. They were a sixth of the entries after all.
Semi-unrelated Crap
Now, with all that done, I suppose it's time we claim our stories, huh? I was the writer of Broken Heart and Light Hearted. Had a third idea, too, but never put it to paper.
>> No. 14731
It was me all along.
Author list: Boundary in Queried Affection, Eternal Fleeting Strain, and The Thoughtful Seeking Gatekeeper. Would there have been more? I didn't want to push it.
Although I fail to change and disguise my voice in my stories. Or the typos. The shame.
Boundary in Queried Affection
The short reason why is: Need more Suika x Yukari in the world. Not that I hate the Yuyu, but you know. Anywho, if I can supply it, then it makes no sense for me to demand it. Indeed though, the biggest struggle lies in the battle of honesty Suika and Yukari mention. The white and black, the small and the large, the two sides of the boundary. I think it's not impossible.
Physical differences aside, this was a mental war. Something oni aren't good at, but I think Suika must be. If she wasn't, she wouldn't even be friends with Yukari. And if it's not because she owes her or anything....Well, it has to come down to speculation. After all, it's the same with Yuyuko, isn't it? And so the paradox cycles.
You can tell Suika it's okay to support her love's interest. But don't tell her that her love has no interest. She'll punch you in the face. A feeling like that, I think.
Eternal Fleeting Strain
I thought about strengthening and coloring the bond between the two. But then I remembered something: "What's in a short? It should leave a feeling of coming to visit, then going and saying goodbye in a day." So this is a story about a girl related to music, and another girl related to music. But that's not all that relates them to each other, in at least two meanings of the phrase that I'm thinking. I had this idea in my pocket among many others, but it finally took form in this contest.
On a more telling note, it IS a rejection. Both of them made a choice. It's also a "what if" of my original idea. Also, I remembered we needed more non-second-to-last and non-final / non-extra stage characters. Meaning Benben and Yatsuhashi. My other options were the other Double Dealing characters, Lunatic Kingdom moon inhabitants, or Nitori. So, I picked the Tsukumos because I thought they lacked content. So I made some, even if it is for a contest.
Oh, and Sekibanki was taken already. In a sense. Sadness. I had a lewd in mind. I think a lewd would have been fun. A non-lewd would've also worked. I know there's quite a few Banki stuff around already, but. That Banki. Banki.
The Thoughtful Seeking Gatekeeper
Fueled by wanting Elly for some reason. And no, I didn't even know we had Elly before writing this. (And when I found out, I shrugged while throwing my palms upwards and was like "Welp, I'm already dedicated.") I enjoy making characters as close as their original. Considering the characters' relationships, the story and dialogue took form in my mind. Of course, Elly herself is a conundrum to write because of the nature of her character. I mean that both in-universe and in meta. So I think Yuuka provides a good anchor without trying to go for a stretch.
Would people believe me if I said this story was made written-possible by "The Very Hungry Caterpillar"? I think that's saying a lot, though. With a pinch of epic poem / Odyssey fuel, as some noticed. I guess that's why the end result tastes different, throwing a bit of experimentation and seasoning in. Or maybe I was just hungry when I was writing this. Either way, I think it can be agreed upon: Yuuka can be mean when she wants to be. Why Yuuka? I think it says a lot if she made an effort to come back. Because it's Yuuka. Then you ask: "If she actually cares, wouldn't that contradict the contest subject because it's not a rejection?" No. It's a rejection. But like all nouns alone, that doesn't mean the noun can't have, say, an adjective or verb with it to modify and change it. This could've been a lewd. But it wouldn't have had the format and structure it did.
Conclusion?
I should enter more contests. But, you know. Maybe I should stick to writing lewds. Back to /at/ I go.
>> No. 14732 I suppose I should name myself here. It feels a little pointless, since literally the only other story I've written was A Tsukumogami's Tale for a contest a few year ago, but oh well.
I wrote Self, Love, Family, and I feel like I didn't achieve what I wanted. I knew I wanted to write about a modern person rejecting Gensokyo, a 'missed protagonist' like
>>14668 mentioned. The problem is that I don't think modern rejection of Gensokyo is outright denial of the supernatural. Instead, it is in mundane actions, missing opportunities for routine, expectations and worldly success. That is also why I used a structure with three instances of rejection, success, and reflection.
The interview format was partially to compensate for my lack of confidence in my ability to write dialogue. Perhaps the story would have been improved from a 3rd person limited perspective as the events happened. Maybe I could have told the story from Suwako's perspective, and how she is rejected by successive generations.
Personal takeaways: Don't try to get too fancy. Probably write my next thing without a 1st person narrator. Suck it up and write some dialogue.
>> No. 14733>>14732It was my second favorite for sure. It seemed so inconsequential and yet so tragic. Like a guy who went cold turkey for ten years finally giving up or a man with great talent for medicine deciding not to study in college after all.
The phrase "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" comes to mind.
It is somewhat hard to explain, sorry.
>> No. 14734 As everyone is revealing their creative process, I suppose I'll get mine out of the way.
>>/shorts/2059 Broken Heart
This was the one I really wanted to write. I've always wanted to try my hand at a depressing Koishi perspective, and twisting it into her
wanting to be seen, yet being
unable accomplished that well, I feel. Koishi is one of my favorite Touhous to write for simply due to flexibility. She can be so many things.
>>/shorts/2072 Light Hearted
This one I more thought up on a whim than anything else. I was feeling like dusting off my old Prismrivers, yet took inspiration from another set of Prismrivers as well. Physically unfeeling poltergeist met geists set in their ways. Unable to grow as individuals. Unable to feel the cold or feel the hot. Unable to truly understand themselves, yet unable to simply roll over for it either.
And then I threw some yuri on Merlin, giving an interesting feeling of helpless hopelessness. She felt the way a dead woman felt. Or did she feel the way a dead woman thought another dead woman felt? I never did decide which to go with in the end, for it was unimportant. The consideration of which it was was the truly important part.
However, with as much time as they've had, that applies one issue. While they don't grow, they learn. While they don't feel, they think. While they aren't the Prismrivers, they are. Where as the human Merlin never confessed — whether in reality of fantasy being unimportant — this Merlin did. But what does an AI do when it decide to do something it doesn't know how to do? Decides to do something it can't? Something it wasn't planned ever to do? And, what's more, the other AI in question being told to go along with something is has no idea what to really do with.
In essence, this was less a story and more a demonstration — a demonstration of what one can do with Prismrivers when taken to a logical extreme.
>>14731Well, fancy you mentioning more contest, because
I'm starting a fairy interesting contest at 00:01. >> No. 14738 Wow. I was expecting maybe second place again at best, but here I went and won. A sincere thanks to those who voted for me and to those who voted at all. This was a pretty novel contest, so I'm glad to have participated.
What can I say about Lost from Home? It's one of those stories that sort of fell together because I already had the requisite pieces. This Kogasa is basically Kogasa from If You Spook the Buddha in (what I imagine would be) her own post-epilogue story. That is, things ultimately didn't work out, and she's back to a life of wandering and spooking. On the other hand, Keine is a mix of different Keines from a couple of different stories plus a little of my own headcanon. It may or may not have come across very well, but the autobiographical story that Keine tells is actually something from decades back, maybe close to a century. The 'big fight' that killed her parents? It was a civil war that may have had some influence on the sealing of Gensokyo. The point is that Keine has seen some shit, and that's why she's able to be as understanding as she is with Kogasa. And that was really the launching point of the story: They're both outcasts of a sort who are locked in their 'roles'.
I could probably blather on a bit further, but I think I'll leave it at that. Feel free to pelt me with questions if you want to know anything else.
Again, thank you so much for reading and voting. It's a bit embarrassing that so many typos and editing notes got left in this time, but I guess that doesn't matter too much in the end. And, yes, I'm still updating my stories. Once I'm back from Japan, I'll be back to them as close to full-time as possible. Until then!