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File 131160210036.png - (444.91KB, 715x894, 2c3bcdc7a1567de75debf83cc7b0028c.png) [iqdb]
I'm gonna try and make this a short story considering that I'm trying to daily update two other stories, but considering how out of control the Orin story got I can't make any guarantees so...hey, forgive me if I'm biting off more then I can chew

"Really? He did that?"

"Yeah! I was like, so shocked too, ya know? I mean, what kinda guy does that these days?"

"Oh you know it, sister. Guys these days, major blech with a capital B, am I right?"

"Totally, but this guy, omigawd, he knew his way around with a tongue like--"

"Hey! What're you girls doing?! Back to work!"

Yep...gossipy crow tengu, doing what they do best. You tire of it so. It's grown weary on your tastes. You used to be such a womanizer. When you were younger, anyways. After a while, the crow tengu all...seemed the same. As did the white wolves as well. They were stuck up, while the crows were just too loose. Too...dumb to live, at times. That slut Aya is the worst of them, being ever so obnoxious and annoying. She likes to party, but she does seem to get in your way quite often, for some odd reason. You can't put your finger on it, but that woman has a personal vendetta against you.

However, while the crow tengu are loud and obnoxious, and the white wolves are strict and overbearing, there's one woman that stands out amongst the both of them, one absolutely perfect female that is the combination of everything good about both parties and has none of the downfalls of either. This delicious specimen of the estrogen bearing has been your current target for a while now, and no matter how much you try and refine your tastes, your tact and your habits, you just can't seem to snare her...yes, the crow known as Hatate Himekeidou.

That luscious brunette hair that makes twin tails look more sophisticated then they ever looked before, the stylish plaid skirt with the delightful violet tone, the hip 'spirit camera' that she carries, exclusively made for her by the kappa, pounding everyone else's ordinary cameras into the dust. Yes, she's been evasive of you ever since you tried bagging her, but maybe your luck will change soon? After a recent festival held by the Moriya Shrine, rumors hear tell that Hatate went and got a love fortune. That could only mean one thing, of course.

Though, your love fortune read 'Very Bad Luck,' stupid fortunes.

Your name is Satoru. Last name is unimportant. If you really want one, you can make up your own. Not like any of the other tengu would care, right? You're not sure why last names are important he-oh right, inbreeding. In any case, you are a crow tengu much like Hatate is. You're a little older then her, but this hasn't stopped you from trying to put the moves on her, albeit unsuccessfully. Hatate is much more cultured then the rest of the crows, which possibly stems from her withdrawal from society early in her life up until now. You're not sure what happened that brought her out, but you're thankful for it. Otherwise you wouldn't get the chance to woo such a charming young lady.

You stand up from the outdoor bar you've been idling in for a while now. It's time to go. You just watched Hatate approach one of the business centers and enter it. You think it's high time you filled your quota for the day. Looking up at the sky after walking out from under the awning that covers the outdoor bar, you see nothing but a see of gray. It's going to rain soon. How unbecoming. Such is the signal of bad luck. But you won't let this get you down. Not even for a brief second. The show must go on, after all.

You head into the building you saw Hatate disappear into. It's one of the printing facilities. Yamabushi primarily run the printers and most of the physical paperwork. You know, the paperwork that doesn't involve filling out forms but actually acquiring said paper and making it fit for distribution and writing and...stuff like that. You never really bothered learning much about it because, well, you're a crow after all. It's not your job. Your job is scouting and gathering intel. Your current objective right now, for example, is getting more information about the lovely young woman that has captured your heart so.

"Ah, Miss Hatate?" The crow stops as you successfully locate her walking down one of the printing ailes. What business does she have here?

"Ugh...yes, Satoru?" Hatate greets you with a sigh as she turns around, exasperated at your mere presense. She must be in a bit of a bad mood! Maybe you should try and make it seem important...that would be the best case scenario in any case, but lord knows you're not perfect.

[ ] I need your help with something...
[ ] Lord Tenma actually wanted to see you
[ ] What were you about to do?
[ ] You've taken my heart, I felt it was important that I get it back from you as soon as possible
[x] Lord Tenma actually wanted to see you
If it's real, it's important. If not, then protag is just lying to see Hatata.
Also, you're starting with a huge handicap, mongrel.
[x] You've taken my heart, I felt it was important that I get it back from you as soon as possible

This seems like a classic underdog story, so we need to follow convention. We need to be as lame as fucking possible in the first encounter so that we might start as low as we possibly can on the bar so that we might work our way up and earn her love, yes.
Dear god, You're actually doing it. You are not going to make this shit a short, you're going to make it an awesome. Yes, an awesome.

[x] Tell her you're sorry for being a creep.

Obviously MC has stalked Hatate before. Let's fix that.

That only works in anime.
I must admit that the fact that the protag is a youkai annoys me (even if the fact that he's a mongrel makes things harder for him).
But Sukima wrote good stories in the past, so I'm going to give it a try and follow this story. Because I'm a nice person after all.
[x] Tell her you're sorry for being a creep.

A creep? This guy? No fucking way. How could Hatate even think that? Well, she's got the wrong impression, but telling her that won't go over well, so he'd best apologize for this wrong he hasn't committed. Women...

You might wanna wait on this write-in if you wanna leave an impact with it.
[x] You've taken my heart, I felt it was important that I get it back from you as soon as possible

Satoru is the king of suave. With such amazing pick-ups like this any woman in Gensokyo would get weak in the knees.
[x] Lord Tenma actually wanted to see you
Well fuck. >>20012 here, changing to:
[x] Lord Tenma actually wanted to see you
Uh, she's in a bad mood and telling her bad pick up lines or lies isn't really gonna help.

[x] What were you about to do?
[x] What were you about to do?
The truth.
[x] Lord Tenma actually wanted to see you
[x] Lord Tenma actually wanted to see you
File 131166576678.jpg - (796.90KB, 1399x1000, 59ba62faddcec6f1b83a9d15348c398a.jpg) [iqdb]
[x] Lord Tenma actually wanted to see you

"Eh?" Just like that, Hatate's expression changes. It works every time. Lord Tenma is someone even you respect, so even Hatate's tune changes when it comes to the big boss. "What did Lord Tenma want with me?"

"Well I'll take you to find out, how's that?" Once again though, just like that, Hatate shifts, now looking at you suspiciously. However, it's only for a brief moment, as she decides to believe you.

"Well, alright then. Let's go."

The two of you leave the printing facilities and head over towards Lord Tenma's palace. It's really nice walking beside her like this, she's so calm, elegant, refined, even the way she walks is so much different from how other crows do it. She's truly a perfect specimen in every way.

You, however, are not. Moments after getting out of the facility, you realize your folly. Why would Lord Tenma want to see Hatate? You never got a message about it. In fact, if you actually brought her before Lord Tenma...oh, you could face jail time for that retarded move. You need to do something before you make it there...showing up in front of Lord Tenma's door is not an option!

[ ] Stop Hatate and apologize profusely
[ ] Stop and pass it off as a prank on her
[ ] Stop and feign an injury to try and make her forget about it
[ ] Stop and take her into the nearest bush to 'silence' her
[ ] Stop. Hammertime.
[x] Stop and feign an injury to try and make her forget about it

This will work! This will work!
[x] Stop and pass it off as a prank on her
If he's considered a prankster, it's still better than being considered a creep.
So, prank or hammertime.
[x] Stop and pass it off as a prank on her
[x] Stop and pass it off as a prank on her


I think it's probably too late for that.
Because I though it was a serious option!
It's Sukima's fault for not telling us it was a cake!
[x] Stop. Hammertime

Why not?
[x] Stop Hatate and apologize profusely
Stop being a creep goddamn.
Do the creep.
[x] Stop and take her into the nearest bush to 'silence' her

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
[X] Stop Hatate and apologize profusely.
[x] Stop. Hammertime.
I've got diplomatic immunity, and Hammer you can't sue.
[x] Stop. Hammertime.

We're going to fail miserably at making Hatate think we are anything but a retard/moron/dunce. After we've hit rock bottom with her, we can work our way back up yes.
[ ] Stop. Hammertime.
File 131173180825.png - (38.92KB, 650x509, hammertime.png) [iqdb]
[x] Stop. Hammertime.

You can't think of any way to get out of this situation. Not one that wouldn't end with dire consequences that you're obviously not ready to face. There's only one way out of this now. One way that the broke brother himself would do.

"Stop." You successfully stop Hatate from taking another step forward as she looks at you curiously. Then, in one of your best moves yet, you put your hands to your bent legs and start shimmying the fuck out of there. "HAMMERTIME!"

You're not sure if that worked to perfection like you imagined it would. But you did escape without any fuss.

It's the next day. You decided to avoid Hatate for the rest of yesterday in case something more retarded ended up happening. Also to keep yourself from feeling the consequences from your utterly foolish move. Hopefully Hatate didn't think too ill of you for that clumsy maneuver. You did however exit the scene quite gracefully so that might have made up for it marginally.

You're at the outdoor bar again. It's a frequent place of recreation for you. Get in a few smooth drinks, spectate the world passing by you, meet a few chicks...none of them are of course as perfect or lovely as Hatate. You haven't seen her all day though. Usually she swings by at least once to berate your choice of drinks. (Drambuie is a damn fine liquor!) But you haven't seen her all day...you hope she didn't get in trouble with Lord Tenma yesterday. That would be the pits. She would never deserve such ill punishment. You would say that you wouldn't either, but you were the one that got her mixed up in that mishap to begin with.

"Hey, Barky," you call out to the barkeeper as you approach the counter, "seen Hatate anywhere?" The big white wolf tengu tending to the bar just looks at you rather unamused while he cleans one of the mugs.

"No, and stop calling me that. That's derogatory." Pfft. As if he would know anything about derogatory, being a white wolf tengu.

"Uh huh. Okay, what about Lord Tenma? Any interesting news about-"

"Now that you mention it, there is something about Hatate that I heard..." Oh boy. Here it comes. You're putting on your best me gusto face for this one.

"...what would that be?"

The barkeeper looks away...with his hand outstretched a bit. Guh, you forget how this guy makes his real dough. With how gossipy the crow tengu are, this guy must make a king's ransom in rumors. Which he obviously resells over and over again...

You suppose, just this once, you can part with a few pence to know what happened.

"Thank you. In any case, people have been milling about saying Hatate skipped out on a personal meeting with Lord Tenma..."

"Guh, just as I tho-...wait, what?"

"That's what people are saying. Blowing off Lord Tenma like that...I'm sure that's a crime somehow."

Oh man, so Lord Tenma did actually want to see Hatate? How come you were never aware of this? You could've actually been a hero! Or something along those lines. Seems your blunder was a...double blunder. Or something along those lines.

Maybe the alcohol is getting to you a little. Surprising news nonetheless less though. You will...

[ ] See Hatate about this. You need to apologize.
[ ] See Lord Tenma about this. You need to fix this.
[ ] See other people about this. You need to stop these rumors.
[ ] See no one about this. You need to fulfill your drinking quota first.
>Then, in one of your best moves yet, you put your hands to your bent legs and start shimmying the fuck out of there

That said, why the fuck is this his fault? He just said 'Hammertime!' and got out of dodge, Hatate should've just gone to see Tenma anyway.

[x] See Lord Tenma about this. You need to fix this.
At first I was like "FUCK YEAH IT WORKED"

Then came the part where we got boned. Oh well, at least he shimmied the fuck out of there.

[x] See Lord Tenma about this. You need to fix this.
[X] See Lord Tenma about this. You need to fix this.

See now, there was too much 'STOP' and not enough 'HAMMERTIME'.
[x] See no one about this. You need to fulfill your drinking quota first.

The rumors started because of him. Hatate was correct to skip out on the meeting. But fuck stopping the rumors, there's drinking to be done!
[X] See Lord Tenma about this. Own up to screwing up and making a terrible pop culture reference
[X] See Lord Tenma about this. You need to fix this.
[X] See Lord Tenma about this. You need to fix this.
[x] See no one about this. You need to fulfill your drinking quota first.
File 131177144735.jpg - (643.48KB, 1100x800, bf74cf19799ff1dd39023128c86dc10e.jpg) [iqdb]
[x] See Lord Tenma about this. You need to fix this.

Yeah. If Lord Tenma really wanted to see Hatate, then it would be your fault that she didn't end up seeing Lord Tenma in the end. So, like any true man, you must go and cover up your ugly brown excrement. Never mind the fact that if you hadn't told that lie in the first place, none of this would have happened. You take your returned to sender poo in stride and start marching over to the great Lord Tenma's palace. Visiting hours should be open at this time, so maybe you can get away scott free with asking about this, and then fixing it at the source.

You approach the massive building. Yes, Lord Tenma's palace is indeed, something grand and magnificent. Truly fit for a king. Or a queen. Or any sort of royal icon, you guess. It doesn't matter. What does matter is that Lord Tenma rests in the mighty throne room here, and you're about to go and crash whatever party they're having. Even if they aren't having a party, you will crash it.

You walk up, give the guards a notice to visit Lord Tenma, and ultimately get permission to enter the throne room and approach Lord Tenma in the flesh. Surrounded by a vast array of muscly tengu guards, Lord Tenma sees you approach and says...

"'eyyy, make it shor' huh? A lady's gotta alotta crap 'n' shit ta do in her spa'h time..."

Yes, this is Lord Tenma in the flesh. A large woman utterly dominated by her alcohol. She's a stunning woman, however, so you let it slide.

A funny thing about Lord Tenma. Lord Tenma itself is actually just a title assumed by the supposed 'head' of all tengu under one jurisdiction. This Lord Tenma here has only been in this position of power for a few years now, but she's shown excellent potential...well, excellent potential to be weak to alcohol. But she has shown amazing leadership skills. That, and she's incredibly hot. Only tengu better then her is Hatate, you feel. That silver hair wrapped around her head like that really does wonder for her mature appearance.

"Yes mi'lord," you say as you bend down to one knee, bowing your head. You may be a little off your rocker, but you know how to show respect when it comes down to it. "I have heard rumors that a Miss Hatate Himekaidou missed an important meeting with you. Is there some truth to these rumors?"

"Ehh? Imnortant...ah fer cripes' sake did ah meesh anutha won?"

You swear this woman is a lot nicer when she hasn't downed several gallons of sake.

"Well uh...that is what rumors are saying, mi'lord."

"Gahh...shtoopid meetings...wateva! Shish guy can go...go...fook himself! Ahahaha!"

You really do swear.

"So...I guess if you hadn't heard about it, then the rumors weren't true, mi'lord?"

"Eh? Whut aboot mah hair do? Ya makin' fun o' mah hair, ya creep?"

"No! Not at all, mi'lord. In fact I think your hair is absolutely stunning in all regards."

"Hahaha! Retards~" You notice Lord Tenma taking another sip and thinking about something. "Ya know, ah dun rememba anythin' aba...abaut sum sorta meeting or...whatever...ah know! Ah'll sing a song! Ohh ai-dee-dai-dee-dai-dee-dai-dee-dai-dee-dai...~"

...right, time to move on.

After exiting Lord Tenma's palace, you give it some thought. Well, the matter, not the fact that Lord Tenma needs to control her drinks sometimes. Lord Tenma obviously knows nothing about the supposed meeting that Hatate blew off, so they're false rumors for sure...hmm, what to do about that?

[ ] Time to hit on Hatate. You mean apologize, of course.
[ ] You should stop the crows from being so gossipy about this.
[ ] What you should be doing is drinking.
[x] You should stop the crows from being so gossipy about this.
To save her reputation!
[x] You should stop the crows from being so gossipy about this.
Stupid rumors got me fooled.
[x] What you should be doing is drinking.

Drink now. Apologize later.
[x] You should stop the crows from being so gossipy about this.

Works for me~!
[x] Time to hit on Hatate. You mean apologize, of course.

Why not?
[x] What you should be doing is drinking.

Eyes on the prize guys. We need to make a good impression on Hatate, and the only way we can do this is by imbibing a little bit of the ole' liquid courage.
[X] You should stop the crows from being so gossipy about this.

No one likes being given bad information.
[x] You should stop the crows from being so gossipy about this.
[x] You should stop the crows from being so gossipy about this.

Just started reading this and ugh. I don't think any woman likes an insincere womanizer. The best course is to try to do some good and improve Satou's reputation.
[x] You should stop the crows from being so gossipy about this.

You guess you should try and stop the spread of rumors before it gets worse. Those idiotic crows couldn't tell the difference between the truth and a flat out lie even if it hit them square in the face. Never mind the fact that you're one yourself. You're different! Just like Hatate. That's why the two of you are perfect for each other. At least, that's what you like to think.

"Hey you!" You shout to a couple crow women walking by. No one shall be safe from your correcting rampage!

"Huh? What do you want?" The first one questions you in such a condescending tone that it bothers you.

"Yeah like, we're kinda busy, ya know." The second one isn't much better. Nonetheless, you must persevere.

"Stop spreading these rumors about Hatate missing a vital meeting with Lord Tenma! It's disrespectful to spread such slander!" The two crows just look at each other and then back at you patronizingly.

"What, are you still trying to lord yourself with that stuck up bitch? Really?"

"Like, she's way out of your league, ya know?"

"Keh! For your information, she is not stuck up, nor is she a bitch! I myself have changed too, I dare not womanize the same way I did before, because Hatate is the only one I'm meant for." You don't seem to be achieving much other then a stand-up comedy act with your speech.

"Yeah right. You're still an ugly creep if you ask me. Just give up."

"Like, seriously. Do you have a death wish or something?"

"Death wish? What makes you say that?"

"That bitch will kill you. She's crazy. Messed up in the head."

"Like, totally insane, ya know?"

"She is not insane!"

"Yeah, sure, just keep telling yourself that bud. We have more important business then to humor your drunken fantasies though, so ciao."

"Like, see ya, chump."

Well, maybe if you continue like this, you could get pity sex from Hatate...

After a few more unsuccessful attempts, you decide it's more productive if you just stop. You're probably only making it worse. Man, you didn't quite notice it before, but a lot of crows don't seem to like you much! It seems more like it's because you're siding with Hatate then the fact that you used to womanize though...it's slowly occuring to you through this incident that Hatate is a lot more hated then you originally thought. No wonder she's so bitter. She obviously needs someone to lick that bitter shell off her and expose that sweet, tender filling, and that person shall be you.

After rethinking that previous analogy, you decide that your next activity should be...

[ ] Seeing Hatate about this rumor business
[ ] Getting to the obvious source of the rumors, Aya
[ ] Hammering yourself down with some drinks
[x] Seeing Hatate about this rumor business

I get the feeling that trying to talk to Aya about this won't work.
[x] Getting to the obvious source of the rumors, Aya
Underdog is an understatement
[x] Hammering yourself down with some drinks

How are we still not drunk? Fuck. This situation needs even more alcohol than I thought.
[x] Hammering yourself down with some drinks

This guy is fucking useless. Perhaps with some alcohol in him he'll get a little more savvy.
[x] Seeing Hatate about this rumor business
Aya isnt any better then those crows, and getting hammered aint gunna do shit.
[X] Hammering yourself down with some drinks.

There are no possible negative consequences at all.
Sounds like you've been drinking a bit too much yourself.
[x] Seeing Hatate about this rumor business
File 131212071463.jpg - (208.96KB, 800x600, 2f304f641016d4d2debe80228b4d7bc4.jpg) [iqdb]
[x] Seeing Hatate about this rumor business

Yes. Of course. Now that you've (probably maybe hopefully not really) solved this rumor shenanigan, it's time to confront the main woman herself. She's been at the center of these rumors all day and it's high time you went and made amends. After all, you were the one that started all of this. You bastard.

It doesn't take too long to find her. You find her idling about in a bit of a remote section of the tengu camp, fiddling about with her camera. You take a quick moment to improve your appearance and make sure you don't look silly before approaching her.

"Hey, Miss Hatate!" You were hoping for better. But the look on Hatate's face as she hears your voice doesn't fill you with confidence, made worse by the fact that she doesn't even bother looking at you.

"Yes...what is it?"

"Well...I wanted to know what you thought about the rumors." You kind of let Hatate's bad mood intimidate you out of saying the correct words for what you wanted to know, as that really didn't fit as well as you would have liked. With this, Hatate closes her camera and looks at you sternly.

"You need me to tell you?"

"Oh come now, even though I may have lied, I got out of it smoothl-"

"I went to Lord Tenma herself to get this situated and got punished for interrupting her! I'm not in the mood for your ridiculous attitude!" Yikes. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, that's for sure.

"...okay, I'm sorry. Maybe I can take you out to a nice dinner to make it up to you?" Hatate just gives you a very unamused and rather unimpressed look, that tells you something you were partially expecting her to believe. "I'm serious! This isn't just some lame flirt attempt!" Hatate just sighs and rubs her forehead a bit.

"Yeah, and I'm Queen of the World."

"If I had control over that, I would definitely make you Queen of the World."


"Okay, that may or may not have been an actual attempt at flirting."

You need to learn the proper timing for this stuff!

"So tell me why I should find a womanizer to be sincere?"

"Please, Miss Hatate, we both know I've given that lifestyle up. When was the last time you saw me flirt with another woman besides your fairness?"

"Somehow, even if it's only me that you flirt with, it still makes you look like a womanizer."

"A...single girl womanizer?"

"Yes, a single girl womanizer."

"Well as long as you're the only one I'm womanizing..."

"I think you've missed the point..."

A little while after this, you and Hatate got back on...normal terms, for the most part. At least, she doesn't seem angrier then usual at you anymore. That's about all you can ask for. You'll get her someday.

It's the next day, the rumors seem to have faded into obscurity rather quickly. After downing your fifth drink and not feeling the least bit drunk, you think it's time you left the outdoor bar for today. You need to find some way to win Hatate's heart. It's been about three months now since you've narrowed your crosshairs onto her and only her, but all your attempts at wooing her sarcastic woman have all but fell short. Admittedly, the more you try the more you seem to fuck up, but maybe this time will be different. There must be some way to win her over...

[ ] Go and ask Hatate herself
[ ] Maybe Lord Tenma has an idea
[ ] Aya might just possibly know...
[ ] The bar keeper knows everything
[ ] Too much thinking. Not enough drinking.
[x] Too much thinking. Not enough drinking.

Back to the zero point, huh? We can go lower! So low that Hatate will have to pity us!
[x] The bar keeper knows everything

More drinking if nothing comes up.
[x] Maybe Lord Tenma has an idea
This can't possibly work.
[x] Maybe Lord Tenma has an idea

I don't think this is a serious story, so I'm voting for the most stupid thing possible.
Ask the supreme overlord bigboss how to win a crow's heart.
[x] The bar keeper knows everything

Bros before hoes. Luckily, this bro will help us get our hoe.
[x] Too much thinking. Not enough drinking.

The barkeep ain't our bro. He'll charge us for every scrap of information we want, and turn around and sell our secrets to the next crow who asks. The answer lies within the bottle, I'm tellin' ya.
[x] Maybe Lord Tenma has an idea

Tenma isn't in enough stories. I demand saturation. IYKWIM
[X] Maybe Lord Tenma has an idea.
He'll probably end up drinking with her in the process anyway.
[x] Maybe Lord Tenma has an idea

Odds are she's drunk enough to think of something crazy/good.
I demand a short after this where a drunk Lord Tenma has sex with this MC after this is done.

You know you want to.
[x] Too much thinking. Not enough drinking.

Screw after this, I'm writing that right now.

[x] Maybe Lord Tenma has an idea

Of course. If anyone knows, it's Lord Tenma. After all, she knows everything, right?

"You want to ask the lord what now?"

This is the response you get upon trying to get into Lord Tenma's palace. You should have expected it, even the mighty tengu leaders can't just grant themselves an audience with Lord Tenma all the time. Who expected some grunt to be able to do that?

"Well, I figure Lord Tenma knows a lot about girls, since she's one herself, and-"

"Okay, stop right there buddy, you do know who we're talking about, right?" The door guard with the deep voice is definitely not going to let you in. You'd rather just hightail it out of there now, since he's got some lecture to do you in with, but you get this feeling that if you blew him off, he might give chase and start introducing you to those huge muscles of his. In a very uncomfortable way.

Still though, being who you are, you argue anyways.

"Lord Tenma is wise and has plenty of sage advice, so what's wrong?"

"You, dumbass. Lord Tenma ain't just some free personal advisor for anyone. Hell, she got her own for that kind of shit."

"Does that mean I can see them instead?"

"I dunno dickfucker, what do you think?" Dickfucker? Seriously?

"...man, you must be really troubled to have to use a word like that."

"Hey, I don't need no pity from someone who has to go to Lord Tenma to know how to bag a chick in bed."

"And I don't have to wipe my ass to know that was a retarded insult."

"Well...okay, I try man, alright? You only get out so much by being Lord Tenma's door guard, y-you just...don't know man!" You're standing here watching this guy quickly crumble down into a shadow of his formerly intimidating self, and it's really kind of sad. You give the poor guy a little comfort by patting him on the shoulder while he tries to recalculate just what went wrong in his life.

"It's alright. We all have our faults. Look at me, I used to womanize all the tengu on the mountain until I realized they were all dumb bitches, and people still hold that against me. But hey, I still move on anyways, I ain't gonna let that bother me, and you shouldn't let that bother you either, 'aight?"

"Yeah, you're...you're right. I gotta stand tall as Lord Tenma's door guard. I mean, what the hell else would I be? Some goofy exotic dancer in one of the strip bars?"

"I hear they pay really well, but that's beside point."

"Yeah, no where near as satisfying as serving Lord Tenma, after all."

"It's the hair isn't it?"

"Totally. No other woman on this planet knows how to take care of their hair better then Lord Tenma."

"It's good to know we agree on something then. So can you let me see her now?"


"Fuck." With a deep sigh, you turn around and start walking off feeling like a complete and total failure. Bad end or whatever. But before you get far, the guard gets your attention again.

"Hey, wait, if you really need help, there is a counseler in the village. They opened up recently but they know a good deal of stuff." The burly guy walks up to you and hands you a business card. "Here, maybe they can help you the same way you helped me, right? Lots of luck to you."

As you awkwardly give your new...friend a bit of a farewell you wander back off with the card in hand. Hmm...'Tengu Agency Counseling and Talking for LESS?' An odd name, to say the least. You're not sure if you could trust this guy. He could be gay for all you know. But now you've got this card and an inability to see Lord Tenma about this issue...oh, what to do?

[ ] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot
[ ] You need Lord Tenma's advice! You'll just have to sneak in...
[ ] This was a bad idea from the beginning. Back to the batcaver!
This out of memory bullshit needs to stop.
[x] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot
Yessssss go talk about your many, many problems with a most-likely incompetent confidant this is the best idea.

I like this story more with every update.
[X] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot

Works for me~!
[x] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot

Totally agree with you.
Tell me about it.
[X] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot
[ ] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot

I just have to see what kind of horrid advice comes from an organization named TACTLESS.
[x] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot
[X] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot


Also, MC seems to be building a rapport with one of Lord Tenma's door guards. There could be a big payoff in the future if we do this right.
Man this Tenma is a drunktard garbage and I still feel we would've gotten better advice with her.

[x] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot
>at story and its the one i requested

I love you bro. So fucking much.
[x] This was a bad idea from the beginning. Back to the bar!

This guy is a notorious womanizer, and more importantly, an alcoholic. This completely clashes with his current image of a lovesick retard. I am now certain that it is the alcohol that completes this drastic change.
[x] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot
[x] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot
[x] Maybe this counseling bull is worth a shot

Who knows. You need some advice, you'll take it from just about damn well anyone. What's the worst that could happen?

You find the moderately small building somewhere off to the side of the tengu village. No wonder these guys don't get much business, who the hell would stumble across this place without looking for some out of the way area to bone some random chick in? They say location is one of the most important parts of business, so whoever's heading this place has obviously failed that class.

"Hello, please take a number and seat yourself down or whatever." This is the response you get from the lazy looking crow tengu sucking on a lollipop while reading some woman's magazine behind the counter. She looks so utterly out of place here, they probably would have done better hiring a kappa to sit here with a robot. Fucking kappa.

"Take a number? Is there only one counselor available or something?" The young girl just directs her eyes towards you in a lazy glare that would really scare no one, but does make you feel kind of stupid.

"Well yeah, duh. Dr. Tousan is only like, the best counselor on the mountain. Take a look." She points off to the side and you get an eyeful of the waiting room. Why...why are there so many people here? ALl of them aren't even tengu! Furthermore, isn't that the Moriya Shrine goddess? What is going on down here...

"...so, what number are you serving right now?" The crow takes the lollipop out of her mouth long enough to tell you.

"One hundred thousand thirty seven. Here's your number." She gives you a small slip of paper with the number...187,560. "Better get to waitin' buddy."

This just cannot be right under any circumstance.

After a few dreadfully boring hours of waiting around and reading the utterly stupid magazines strewn about the waiting room, they finally call your name as you're on the verge of falling asleep.

"Calling number one eight seven five six oh! Dr. Tousan will see you now!"

"Ugh, finally..." you mumble as you get up off the chair you've been using as a personal sleeping arrangement and head into the doctor's office.

What's inside stuns you. The decor is very sophisticated, with a few old paintings covering any wall that isn't lined with books, the rug is incredibly soft, the table in middle of the room is victorian style, complete with a set of tea upon it, and the chairs look very comfy. The most surprising bit of all though, is the good doctor that you waited hours to see. Long, slender silver hair, a piercing gaze, thin glasses, and a body like a wolf. Well...she is a wolf, you guess. It's quite unlike anything you've ever seen; it's a white wolf who apparently chose knowledge over power. Something you never see amongst the tengu ranks.

"Is something the matter? Sit down." Dr. Tousan invites you to sit in the chair opposite of her. You're still pretty taken aback by all this. You're not sure how to respond, apart from going ahead and sitting down as instructed. "So then, tell me what it is you're here for."

"...you." You briefly let your subconscious take over while the rest of you attempts to get over the sheer shock of the situation. This just earns a bit of a tilted head from the doctor though.

"Yes, that's correct, but why, is what I'm asking." After shaking your head and getting the evil thoughts out of your head, you try to sum it up. It's a little hard to concentrate with the doctor looking as hot as she is...you would gladly start flirting, but not only do you think this would be rude given her business time, but that would more or less defeat the point of you being here in the first place.

"Oh, right. Ah...well, I'm here to ask for advice on..." You quickly throw away the casual words you were about to use. Tact, man! You have plenty of it that you use around Hatate, this isn't the barkeeper. "Advice on courting one of the tengu amongst our ranks." The white wolf with a penchant for counselling raises her eyebrow slightly as she looks at you.

"Love advice? Well, I can't say I don't get that often enough..."

"But...?" The doctor then sits back, taking a cup of her tea in hand.

"This is the first time a male has come to me seeking such advice without using the word 'fuck' so I guess I will humor you." Man...are there really that low an amount of tengu without tact? You feel better about yourself while simultaneously feeling bad for your own race. "So, without telling me the woman's name, describe her...personality to me." You blink for a bit. It almost seems like a fortune reading when she denies you telling her Hatate's name, but you guess, in the same way that she's humoring her, you should humor her back.

"Well, she was pretty withdrawn until somewhat recently in her life, I guess. She's very sophisticated, unlike a lot of other tengu, and she's rather sarcastic at times too...but she's also pretty diligent. She's really smart, pretty, stable-"

"I think that's enough." The good doctor cuts you off as she writes a few things in a notepad she must've grabbed while you were fantasizing about Hatate. "This woman, can you think of anything important of life changing that may have happened to her?" You shake your head. "Can you think of any potential rivals that you might have?" You shake your head. "Can you think of any faults within yourself that she might not desire?" You shake yo-... "I see. Tell me more about yourself then."

God dammit. You think you kind of walked right into that one. "Alright, where do I start then?"

"Anywhere you wish. Any details about your past, what you do now, your relations with this woman, it will all be useful. It is your choice."

[ ] Your old womanizing ways is obviously a great place to start
[ ] Maybe this shrink can tell you what's wrong with you now
[ ] Time to recollect about the many failures you've had
[ ] Just get straight to the point; why Hatate is adverse to you
[x] Your old womanizing ways is obviously a great place to start
[x] Time to recollect about the many failures you've had

What failures? Curious~ Someone will ask for another /at/ story within three updates.
[x] Just get straight to the point; why Hatate is adverse to you

I'm assuming this involves us telling her everything, including the first vote, correct me if I'm wrong.

I'll remember to put the note on my fridge
[x] Your old womanizing ways is obviously a great place to start
[x] Just get straight to the point; why Hatate is adverse to you

Pussyfooting around won't help us. We need to get straight down into the dirty, sordid details. We've already gotten her cooperation by being tactful, so now's the time to dispense with that shit and get to what we're here for; honest advice from an outside party as to what we can do to improve ourselves so Hatate notices us.
[X] Your old womanizing ways is obviously a great place to start.
[x] Time to recollect about the many failures you've had.

The way to fix a problem is to fix the cause, not the effects.
[x] Time to recollect about the many failures you've had.
[x] Just get straight to the point; why Hatate is adverse to you
[ ] Maybe this shrink can tell you what's wrong with you now
---[ ] Your old womanizing ways is obviously a great place to start

...Totally not suggesting that the answer should be clear as day to our hero.
[x] Time to recollect about the many failures you've had
[x] Your old womanizing ways is obviously a great place to start

"Well...a while back, I used to hit on girls..." You look at the adviser as she gives you...well, her expression doesn't actually change, but it's still quite judging nonetheless. "Uh...a lot."

"I see." The doctor proceeds to write in her little notepad before urging you to go on. Boy, this is gonna be something else.

"I learned how to flirt at an early age, and a lot of girls and women liked me. I taught myself a lot about how to treat a woman and how to be friendly and for a nice while, it worked. Sometime when I became an adult, I already had a few partners and the number just kinda kept growing..." The doctor before you just looks at you quite simply.

"So you think your incessant womanizing is putting distance between you and this woman that you seek?"

"Uhm...I really don't know. I was kinda hoping you would know." You're honestly just shooting in the dark here. You just told her what you felt was the closest thing to what could be bothering her. Doesn't put you any closer to your goal, but the shrink seems to think otherwise.

"Truth of the matter is that you know better then I do. If you believe that this is an obstacle in your relationship with her, then indeed, it must be so. Not only would such behaviour be unfavourable in a mate, but a reputation such as that will diminish her own as well should she choose to associate with you. Try to flirt less and be more strict on yourself, as well as being more productive. Is that clear?" With a big sigh, you can tell this doctor isn't gonna give much good advice to you.

"Yeah, sure..."

As you walk out of the building, you feel like this was a waste of time. You didn't like being told what to do, particularly when she really didn't seem to tell you what you could be doing wrong. Jeez, what is this, rocket science? You'll have to get the kappas' help on configuring Hatate, at this rate.

[ ] Well, time to test the sage's advice; off to see Hatate!
[ ] Maybe get some third opinions on this first...
[ ] Bleh, may as well go back to drinking
[ ] You're gonna sock that door guard in the jaw for this...
[x] You're gonna sock that door guard in the jaw for this...

Hey. You. Fuck you.
[x] Maybe get some third opinions on this first...

Maybe he is the only one that got screwed over. If he is the only one then I think it is back to drinking.
[x] Bleh, may as well go back to drinking

Vote for different thing.
[x] Bleh, may as well go back to drinking
[x] Maybe get some third opinions on this first...
Drinking wouldn't help things.
[x] Maybe get some third opinions on this first...

Is some variation of "go get hammered" going to be an option for every vote? Running joke of the story, perhaps?
[x] Maybe get some third opinions on this first...

From the way I see the votes going it's as if they don't want this to end well.
[X] Maybe get some third opinions on this first...

I have this feeling that the drinking options lead to an immediate Surrender Bad End. Not gonna test that theory just yet, though.
[X] Maybe get some third opinions on this first...

That was... not as bizzare and anti-sensical as I expected.

Yeah I'm experiencing another "weak" phase in my writing. If you've followed me since the beginning of HotS then you're probably familiar with me consistently daily updating for about a week to half a week and then going weeks without updating again. This is why.
File 131557496668.png - (440.96KB, 551x778, 21499333.png) [iqdb]
Waiting coldly~
[x] Maybe get some third opinions on this first...

"Huh? You? Womanizing? I thought you gave that up ages ago." The barkeep tells it like it is. Of course it was natural, that you would come back here after such a miserably failure.

"That's what I thought too! But the shrink seems to think otherwise," you say as you take another swig of the beer the keeper has served you.

"Well, your reputation still does precede you. Maybe she was telling you that you should make it more obvious that you aren't womanizing anymore."

"Oh yeah? How? Like that'll earn me anything other then making it seem like I'm womanizing more." You take yet another gulp after rolling your eyes at that ridiculous comment. If nothing else, you're a little savvy about how these tengu act.

"Where there's a will, there's a way, eh? Just like how I'm going to will you into paying your tab."

"Maybe tomorrow." You hear the barkeep just sigh as he resumes cleaning the mugs for future use, as soon it'll be night and full of rowdy drunks. Not including Hatate, of course. You though? You're a little too lost to be drinking with drunks later. Not that you do it too often. You're trying to be more sophisticated like Hatate is, after all. But still, this bothers you somewhat. Do the other tengu really believe you're still a womanizing jerk? (Probably) Does Hatate think so? (Most likely) Does even Lord Tenma feel that way? (Definitely) It's time you straightened this out.

[ ] Ask the other crows about your womanizing
[ ] Ask Hatate about your womanizing
[ ] Ask the Tenma about your womanizing
[ ] Revisit the shrink and tell her she sucks dick
[c] Ask the other crows about your womanizing.
[c] Ask Hatate about your womanizing.
[c] Ask the Tenma about your womanizing.

In that order.
[x] Ask the other crows about your womanizing
[x] Ask Hatate about your womanizing
[x] Ask the Tenma about your womanizing
If I see anymore multi voting in places where it's not necessary, I'm just going to do the first vote in the multivote and ignore the rest.
[x] Ask Hatate about your womanizing

Straight to the problem.
[X] Ask Hatate about your womanizing

Is she, or is she not, the bird we want our hands on here? I think she is.
[X] Ask Hatate about your womanizing.

Straight to the source.
File 131940217517.png - (1.12MB, 1076x800, 61e471ddd32f4caf6e85b3f990f2be74.png) [iqdb]
[x] Ask Hatate about your womanizing

The sun is setting. The sky glows a deep orange color, yet still brightly illuminating the mountain top due the position of the tengu on the mountain. Crowds are gathering for some late night fun and work is ending. This is the perfect opportunity to confront Hatate about this matter. You've got to set things straight; you're a totally different man then what you were before!

You wave in and out of the groups of tengu passing to and fro. There's so much cheery gossip and shouting going on that you can barely hear yourself think. But one thing is clear, you need to find Hatate. Hatate is someone who dislikes this kind of noise, you know, so there's only a few places where you could find her...

"Ugh...what do you want?"

Sure enough, behind one of the abandoned buildings, you find Hatate playing with her camera. She seems to spot you the very moment you come into view and seems instantly displeased by this. How disappointing. You must remedy this without having to disappear yourself.

"Is that any way to treat the future love of your life?"

Maybe not in that way though.

"Well," Hatate starts off with, closing her camera, "guess I need to find another hiding spot away from you." Reaching your arms forward a bit, you try to stop her, hoping that you don't have to make physical contact, since that would look really bad in this type of situation.

"W-Wait! I need to talk to you about something!" Hatate actually stops, looking over at you, and decides to, for once, humor your inane though process.

"Really? What is it this time? Trying to plan ahead with me on how you want to name our children?"

"Ye-I mean no!" Whew, you almost tripped into that one. "Hatate, this is a serious matter." The cynical look she's giving you doesn't change.

"If you're trying to coax me into seeing Lord Tenma again, it's not going to work."

"No, no joking around this time. I just need to ask you something." Hatate raises an eyebrow as you get ready to ask her. "Hatate, does my womanizing bother you?" It takes a few moments for it to sink in, but once it does, Hatate just stares at you in utter disbelief.

"...what kind of question is that?"

"A serious one?"

You...get this vague feeling you're being a little slow. Maybe airheaded too. Curse these tengu genes!

"Gee, I don't know, you tell me if a woman is disturbed by some circus freaks attempts at being flirty and cool."

"Well I've stopped that! No more of that womanizing and flirtatious attitude. I've become a better man."

"Really? Should I honestly believe that coming from the 'future love of my life?'"

"Well, I'm only like that with you! That's fine, right?" Hatate just brings one of her hands to her forehead, rubbing it in apparent mental pain.

"Haven't we had this discussion before?"

You know, now that she mentions it, this does kinda seem familiar. You should probably push the issue a little more then if this wasn't resolved last time.

"Hatate, what can I do to prove to you that I'm not the creep that you once knew? My heart belongs to you and only you!"

"You sound like some sappy cassanova in a bad romantic movie. But that'd probably be giving you too much credit." Ouch! She sure knows how to add the spice to her insults. Okay, maybe you should stop the noble act and just be straight with her, mimic her frank outlook, so to speak.

"Okay, fine. We'll play it your way. How can I make it up to you for being a stalking asswipe?"

"Well you're already improving if you realize that much, I guess." This girl is giving you such the cold shoulder that it's like having a giant ice cube rammed into your face.

"Enough with the constant jabs at me. Just answer."

"And if there's nothing you can do?" All this time, Hatate doesn't change much of her cynical expression looking at you. It's really kind of bothersome. You need to fix this, somehow, in someway.

"Oh come on, there has to be something. You can't be so closed in and bitter that you're completely immovable."

A thick silence hangs in the air after you say that. During this time you notice Hatate has hidden her eyes from your gaze. Should you not have said that? You get this feeling you hit the mark on something you really weren't supposed to...

"...and if I was...?"

"Then I'd be okay with that!" You answer immediately, with no hesitation. You wanted to make sure Hatate knew that you were unwavering in your desire to make her happy. "In fact, I'd help you! A tengu doesn't deserve to be so cold." Hatate though, just turns around, practically shrugging your declaration off without much thought as she starts walking away.

"Yeah, I'm sure those words mean a lot to someone out there. You're just wasting your breath on me though, so just go home."

"Wait!" As you reach forward and grab Hatate's shoulder, turning her around, you notice that while she's retaining her cynical and now somewhat angry expression, you can see a little bit of...pain in her eyes. You definitely shouldn't have said it. Even if it were true...no, it's not true! Hatate is the perfect woman after all. You were just out of line.

"What? What more do you want with me? Can't you just leave me alone?"

"Not until I make this up to you. There has to be something."

"There isn't. Stop trying."

"You're lying! Surely even you has wanted something to do with someone else for that longest time." Hatate looks like she's about to reject you again, until realizing that she simply can't lie about that.

"...maybe you're right, but you're definitely not that 'someone else' I want to do it with."

"Why does it matter? I can change, I can fit your needs. Just tell me what it is." Hatate just sighs, finally conceding defeat, probably realizing that she isn't going to be able to leave until you're satisfied.

"Fine. But you have to make a guess at it. If you know me so well. If you can't guess right the first time, then you're going to leave me alone the rest of the day. And tomorrow too."

"Wha-...tomorrow as well?"

"I have an important job to do tomorrow and if you're bothering me then I will never be able to live it down. So go on, guess. If you can actually guess right, then maybe, just maybe, I'll humor spending some time with you."

Hmm, tough call. Do you really know Hatate well enough to be making a wild guess like this? Maybe you do, maybe you don't. You can think of a few possible things but...are any of them really it? You're gonna be stepping into an occupied minefield here, but you don't have much choice.

[ ] A simple dinner at someplace more fancy then the tengu restaurants
[ ] She must want someone to take pictures with while reporting
[ ] It has to be something personal, does she actually want a relationship?
[ ] She's been shut in, she needs someone to show her the world
[ ] Back down, there's nothing you can do here other then give up
[ ] Maybe you could suggest something better then what she's thinking of... (write-in option)
Wow we are about as hot as an ice cube.

That was pathetic. I mean I am virgin with aspergers, and I can tell he is doing this wrong.

[x] She's been shut in, she needs someone to show her the world

This is the only right answer.
[x] She wants you to leave her alone for the rest of the day. And tomorrow too.

Too obvious. She didn't say she'd spend time with him right now.
[x] She wants you to leave her alone for the rest of the day. And tomorrow too.
Yeah, I haven't seen a MC so low on CHA since DoLF1's Shirou.

[x] She's been shut in, she needs someone to show her the world.

Here goes nothing.
[x] She wants you to leave her alone for the rest of the day. And tomorrow too.
[x] She wants you to leave her alone for the rest of the day. And tomorrow too
Man, is THP dying or something? Ridiculously slow. Or maybe I'm just unpopular now.

Update later today provided I'm not distracted by something.
That's ridiculous. We love you, Sukima.

It's just that the lack of previous clues to what would be the "right" answer in the story made this a bit of a tricky vote to think about. I know that's what stopped me from voting.
Large breaks mean few votes. People just.. stop checking for updates. Popular stories get more votes, yeah, but they're still going to get less votes than they would if they updated consistently.
[x] She's been shut in, she needs someone to show her the world.

My best guess after reading it over and over again.
I'm mainly talking about THP on whole. I'm more or less used to a lack of votes. I'm just not used to staying on top of a board despite that. This board is literally just that dead. Makes me worry.

That said, I probably should not be talking when I'm missing important dates. UPDATING NOW.
[x] She wants you to leave her alone for the rest of the day. And tomorrow too.

"Well...I'm guessing what you want most at this moment is to be left alone for the rest of the day?"

"Good call. Although that's hardly something you can do with someone else, moron." You take a brief moment to recover from that awful name calling before getting in a rebuttal.

"Wha-...I'm just looking after you, and-"

"Sorry, not worth my time anymore. If you've realized that much then stick to it," Hatate says after turning around, giving you the cold shoulder yet again. Only this time, when she walks away, you can't chase her. How could you, after saying something like that? After all the things you've displayed here, a lack of consistency should not be among them.

Although, this opens up a problem now. You were intending on spending time with Hatate. Isn't what you said taking steps backward from that goal? Just leaving her there rather then actually doing something about it?

You leave the scene feeling highly unsatisfied. It certainly feels like you just dug your hole deeper with her.

"So you guessed that she wanted to be left alone?"


"Even though what you were supposed to guess was what she wanted to do with you? Are you braindead?" The barkeeper reminds you of your utter stupidity later that night, as you're attempting to drown your sorrows.

"Shut up! It was just something she wanted to do with someone, fat chance she wanted to do anything with me..."

"Hatate has that mindset with everyone around her. You're just the only other one she's open about it with."

"What's that supposed to mean..." The barkeeper just shrugs.

"I dunno. It's just speculation but maybe the fact that she tells you these things and not anyone else means she's opening herself up to you. She's rather anti-social, despite her reports."

"...so, who's this other person she's open about it with?"

It just had to be her. Her, of all god damned people.

"Ahh, Satoru! Here so I can make your life miserable some more~?"

This is what you feel like you heard. It was probably different. But anything coming from Aya's mouth that isn't your penis can only be bad.

"Cut the crap," you say to her, not really content on dealing with the crow so early in the morning, but somehow despite your best efforts, you didn't wake up with a hang over today, so this is about the only thing you can do at the moment. "What's your relationship with Hatate?"

"Oh ho, a little jealous of my amazing friendship with her? That might be a little more...?" She's taunting you. You know it! There's no other reason!

You do resist punching her lights out though. You can't explain it, but Aya annoys and frustrates you the most out of all the crow tengu combined. The worst part about it is that you feel as if she's doing it on purpose.

"That's not the point!" You're starting to forget why you came here in the first place. But Hatate is busy today, so this is just about the only way you can make progress with her. "Just give me your secrets. How did you get so close to her?" Aya seems to...give you a bit of a skeptical look at first before returning to her obnoxious grin.

"Close? Well, I guess when you're the best newspaper reporter in Gensokyo, even people like her can't help but come out of their hidey hole and want to aspire to be me~"

"Keh, as if. Even the dirtiest sluts among the tengu wouldn't want to be you."

"Wow, Satoru. Is it that time of month or something? Lighten up." Aya sighs a bit, for once it sounds like you got your message across. Normally she just shrugs off everything you say to her, but that one might've finally broken through that otherwise iron casing. "You sound much more serious then usual. What happened to the fun loving, womanizing Satoru that I knew?"

"He's dead." You state this quite frankly, somewhat proud of yourself. "I've tossed that part of me aside in favour of someone much more classy and dignified."

"Yeah, I noticed when you got all stuffy and stuck up with yourself a while back." Stuffy? Stuck up? You're just more proper now is all! She clearly can't deal with that. "Is Hatate really worth throwing away what made you so fun?"

"Of course! She is the example of absolute perfection and I intend on following her ways to the bitter end."

"So you want to be shut in and disown everyone around you and die alone then, is that it?"


There's so much talk about Hatate being anti-social. You've read her reports. You know what she's done. How can people say this? Are you just blind? No, that can't be it. People are just disapproving of her because she's different. That's all.

"Well, whatever, not my pro-"

"I'll show her fun."


You make a somewhat ridiculous claim, if only to just prove Aya wrong. You can't stand people talking about Hatate like this. There's clearly only one way to go about this.

"If she's so shut in and anti-social then I'll fix that! I'll turn her into a fun loving and happy tengu!"

Aya stares at you for a moment, in quite a bit of amused disbelief, before she can't hold it in any longer and starts laughing.

"Hahahaha! What, seriously?! You're kidding me right?"

"Stop laughing! It's possible and you know it!" Aya takes a few moments to recover from her fit of laughter before coming back to you.

"Pffftch, you're serious, aren't you? Oh man, that takes the cake. Well, this'll be amusing to watch, if nothing else."

"Just shut up and tell me what I can do." Your resolve is pretty firm right now. You want to succeed, just to be with her. You don't care what you have to do.

"Well, I did hear from her that she wanted to get more familiar with the white wolves and the kappa further down the mountain."

"You mean she isn't already?" Aya shrugs.

"They set up shop pretty far down, even though the wolves are tengu it's not like we see 'em everyday." She is right about that. The only white wolf you've seen consistently is the barkeeper.

"Alright, what else?" Aya rubs her chin, thinking of things.

"Well, what I think she needs most is someone to come with her on reporting duties. Of course, I wouldn't be caught dead with someone of such lower caliber, but you on the other hand...~" You grit your teeth trying to resist wiping that cocky grin off the crow's face.

"I said cut the crap."

"Yeah yeah, jeez, so serious..." Aya then folds her arms, looking at you. "That's all I'm gonna say though. There's more but it wouldn't be fun telling you everything for free, now would it?" You can't help but narrow your eyes, she's really antagonizing you.

"You little..."

"Ah ah, is that a way to be speaking to the mediator that'll get you in Hatate's pants?" Ugh...she's got you there. She put it in a crude way, but admittedly, she's the only one that knows enough about Hatate to really get you anywhere with her. She's taking advantage of you though. Should you let her do this?

[ ] You'll just have to do what the wench wants
[ ] The information you got now is fine, you'll deal with her later though
[ ] You want to cut ties with this crow now
Mainly because Lion has slowed his update rate and isn't accepting votes at the moment.
[x] The information you got now is fine, you'll deal with her later though

We have an idea of what Hatate wants know. We really need to start making contacts with the white wolves and the kappa so we can introduce them to Hatate
Wait, she was asking what she wanted to do with him? I thought she was asking how she wanted him to change. feel pretty stupid~

[x] You want to cut ties with this crow now

I think she wants someone to help her make her newspaper ~the best~ and win out over her rival Aya.
It's a little worrying, but if you let that worry prevent you from posting on the dead board, it'll never revive.
[x] The information you got now is fine, you'll deal with her later though
[X] The information you got now is fine, you'll deal with her later though.

Aya, while you may be a useful Aya, you are not a pleasant Aya. To the back burner with you.

Regarding >>20784, THP is just in a downswing due to a low number of new projects compared to the old days of rapid-fire updates and boatloads of writefags. Also, boards other than /th/ tend to be less of a New Kid Magnet; the price of not dealing with those readers is dealing with fewer readers.

You could also probably blame the fact that school is in session again, since we seem to have a high percentage of college students.
Oh, great, another bitchy Aya.

[x] The information you got now is fine, you'll deal with her later though
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[x] The information you got now is fine, you'll deal with her later though

"Listen, you." You point at Aya accusingly as you make your statement. "I ain't gonna be your foot slave, but we'll settle this matter later. For now, I'll just take what I get." Aya seems to giggle a bit, you get this feeling she's going to have a load of fun dangling a carrot in front of your nose this whole time.

"Alright then, Champ. You seem to have your head on straight at least a little, maybe you'll get somewhere with it. If you ever need more clues, I'll be here to extort so many juicy details out of ya~" Aya says all this with a big goofy grin on her face. How much it annoys you so. Like it taunts you. The very way that Aya does herself. Soon enough, Aya bids her leave, much to your celebration, saying something along the lines of needing more delicious pictures taken. Even you want to think more highly of her then to assume she means particularly dirty photos, but you can never be too sure with her...

It's still the late morning. It's just an hour or two before noon, you believe. You got all day. Reflecting on your current status, you accidentally blew Hatate off yesterday, and today she's busy with work. You found something out from the barkeeper though and resisted strangling Aya for some info. You hate to admit it, but it sounds like Aya really knows a lot about Hatate, for some reason...sure, she's a gossipy type who loves spying on people, but you can't see her taking interest in Hatate, of all people. Wouldn't she consider her boring?

That just opens up a whole can of worms though. If that's so...wouldn't it mean Hatate had to have approached Aya first? That scenario...seems even more unlikely. What exactly is going on between those two?

Someone ought to know, but whoever it is, you don't know them. At least, you don't know who they are yet. But maybe it's not worth worrying about just yet. You do have more important things to get working towards. Like what you're going to do about Hatate herself. This is going to be a grand master plan that you have to put effort into planning here. Where to start...

[ ] Might as well see the kappa and wolves ahead of time
[ ] The barkeeper always has some good advice
[ ] Probably not a problem for now
[x] Might as well see the kappa and wolves ahead of time

We should spend a few days building up relations with the kappa and wolves, so that they will come to us first with any news.

Then we take Hatate and she gets her story
[x] The barkeeper always has some good advice

Hatate doesn't really want information on the kappa and wolves. Aya is a dirty liar.
Let's get blasted. A day away from Hatate is a day in the bottle.
[x] Might as well see the kappa and wolves ahead of time
[X] Might as well see the kappa and wolves ahead of time

Even if the barkeep is a liar, at least this is more productive than getting wasted.
meant to say Aya not barkeep, and couldn't remember pass to delete post.
[X] Might as well see the kappa and wolves ahead of time

I blame IRC as it seems to cause people to get lazy.
[Z] Might as well see the kappa and wolves ahead of time
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[x] Might as well see the kappa and wolves ahead of time

Well, you may as well go down and see what all the fuss is about. If you're gonna take Hatate somewhere, you may as well take her somewhere you're at least vaguely familiar with. You did hear that Hatate wanted to meet some new people, so it would do you some good to get a head start on that, so that you can help her with that more efficently. Yeah, that sounds like a capital plan. With that in mind, you turn to leave the tengu camp and start on your way down the magnificent mountain.

The walk is a bit of a journey. A massive waterfall separates the top of the mountain with the abundant spring at the bottom. The kappa make their home at this spring, so they're really sort of like next door neighbors to the tengu, with the white wolves setting up operations just past them, closer to the base of the mountain. Protecting the mountain is a tough job for the wolves, you hear. A lot of them are likely many times stronger then you, though you're probably many times faster. It's been a long while since you're really put any superhuman ability to any use though. Hopefully that speed doesn't show up in all the wrong areas. Hatate wouldn't be satisfied with you otherwise.

As you reach the bottom of the giant waterfall, you over look the spring that extends many times past what you can see, with lily pads and fresh water everywhere. The air is misty with the water coming from where the waterfall ends. It's really refreshing, actually. The air near the top of the mountain is unusually dry, so this kind of humidity is quite invigorating. You imagine that the jungle further down where the white wolves live is rather intense in heat however, due to the ever more increasing levels of said humidity. All the wolves probably wear next to noth--

"Hey mister, what're you doin'?"


You're suddenly ambushed by a little girl, a tot practically, causing you to swivel around quickly and abandoning your fantasy. Judging by their size and the wings, she must be a fairy. An ice fairy, apparently, upon noticing that her wings are made up of solid water. Her kind must gather in the watery mist like this often. That was close though...you wouldn't want to pop one in front of one of these.

"Wha...what do you want?" You ask the fairy after regaining your composure. She just looks at you a bit puzzled though.

"Didn't I just ask you?"

"Is that all you really want?"

"Are you in some kind of hurry?"

"Don't you have something better to do?"

"Are you avoiding my questions?"

"Why would I be avoiding your questions?"

"Aren't you in a hurry or something?"

"What told you that I was in a hurry?"

"Aren't you asking too many questions?"


You can't believe you just played this game with this fairy.

"Well? Speak up! What're you doin' here?" The fairy asks you while having her arms folded. You're gonna have to try this time.

"Isn't it obvious? I'm a tengu."

"Eh? Aren't tengu those silver haired freaks in that forest?"

"Well, yeah...but I'm a tengu too."

"But...you don't have silver hair."

"That's because...I'm a different kind of tengu."

"A different kind huh...what kind then?"

"A magnificent crow tengu, of course."

"...how ugly." What you thought was your firm, graceful stance turned sour very quickly when you noticed the fairy's repulsive look on her face in response to it. "Crows are dirty and greedy, why would you ever want to be one?"

"Hey! Crows aren't dirty, nor are we (that) greedy! For your information, I bathe every day."

"You're still dirty! Pigeons are more well kept then you are!"

"Why you--!"

You take a swing at the fairy in an attempt to grab her, but her small size and fleetness causes her to evade your grasp easily, and she blows a raspberry at you before escaping into the mist. You don't bother chasing her though, she isn't worth it.

Jeez though...what was her problem?

[ ] Go see the kappa first
[ ] Head down to the white wolves
[ ] Enough of these shenanigans, it's probably more productive to head back now
[x] Go see the kappa first
[x] Go see the kappa first
[x] Head down to the white wolves
[x] Go see the kappa first

They'd be friendlier out of the two... hopefully.
[x] Enough of these shenanigans, it's probably more productive to head back now

I'm really enjoying this internal monologue. Oozes character.
[x] Go see the kappa first

Well, first thing's first, you gotta get yourself acquainted with these...kappa that you hear so much about. You don't think you've actually seen all that many up close before, now that you think about it. It's all been in passing. You've never really had a reason to communicate with any kappa up until now. Strange that. You decide to look around your current area for any kappa that may or may not be around.

After getting yourself out of the thick mist that the waterfall generates, you can see vast shallow water as far as the eye can see. A long, wide downhill stream with many large ponds fill the area, and the water is littered with lily pads and water lilies. Despite being wide open, this place is dense with foliage, and you're positive that if you went further into the jungle, you'd die of humidity. How do the white wolves take that kind of climate? Do they all walk around naked or something?

...best not to think about that too hard, you don't wanna repeat a potential tragedy.

You gotta find a kappa first! Maybe get them to introduce you to their other clansmen. But...looking around, you can't see any living soul. At all. It's kind of eerie, the landscape is barren of intelligent life. The only noise you can hear is the gentle smashing of water from the waterfall that you left behind. Well, you did hear that the kappa are rather good at making themselves hidden...you may be watched now, for all you know. You also remember that the kappa are often found underwater...in fact, it would seem that their base of operations could very well be at the bottom of one of these ponds, or even the waterfall itself. It's very likely. You don't want to invade their headquarters right away though, you just need one, single kappa to show you around. That's it. So, since you're here, you may as well go fishing.

With your bare hand.

This couldn't possibly end badly at all.

You approach the edge of the nearest pond and notice that the ground ends very abruptly, marking a sudden drop into deep water. If anything, a kappa would surely be underwater closer to a wall, right? You roll up your sleeve and dip your whole arm into the pond. Holy fudge nuggets, this water is freezing! You guess this would be how the kappa and wolves deal with the humidity down here, this water is liable to freeze your arm right off. You persevere however, even as you feel the chills run down your spine and start blindly searching for anything suspicious to grab onto, and soon enough, you do fish something out.

It's a...swimsuit? A deep, navy blue, one piece swi-


You hear the sudden scream coming from your right and as you look over, you just barely react in time as a veritable boulder sails over your head. It had come from a poor, naked girl who decided that chasing you down was a good idea. You quickly take flight using your magnificent wings and the girl below you is soon joined by two others of the female persuasion, you notice however that the two new arrivals are wearing the same swimsuit you're carrying, and something becomes quickly apparent when the first girl screams at you while you're making your get away.

"Give me back my clothes you jerk!!!"

A few minutes, brutal slaps in the face and a brief explanation later, you're standing before the three girls, who you now assume to be kappa. Thankfully, the one you had the misfortune of thiefing from is now back in her swimsuit where she rightfully belongs.

"If you were looking for us, you could have just shouted first." The kappa that says this is clearly much kinder then the other two, although you can probably understand why one of them would be just a little upset with you.

"Yeah, I'm terribly sorry..." The other kappa that you hadn't stole clothes from then brings her attention to you.

"So you wanted to know more about us because your friend wanted to?"

"Yes. She wanted to meet some kappa in person and I thought, maybe she would have an easier time meeting some if I knew some myself." While the unfortunate kappa is still fuming behind the other two, at least the innocent ones seem to understand.

"Well, that sounds simple enough~" The kinder one smiles at your notion, possibly finding the prospect of someone trying so hard for their friend very admirable. Finally, someone who understands! "Well then, how about we start with us? My name is Nerina." The kind hearted kappa then points to her taller, bustier and slightly more aggressive looking comrade. "This is Naida. And uhh..." She then looks behind herself to the pouting smaller girl, with twin tails, who is quite clearly the most tsundere girl you've ever seen. "That is Ren." After that, she brings her attention back to you and smiles whole heartedly. "It's nice to meet you. What's your name, again?"

"Oh, Satoru. Uh, nice to meet you, I guess." You can't help but feel a little...out of place. You guess that's understandable, these are kappa, born with the water, unlike you, who is more at home with the air. The two elements don't oppose each other, and yet, they feel so...distant. You feel a little small, and it isn't just because you're sitting on the ground like a little child who's lost his mommy.

"So then, anything you need to know?" The busty girl asks. Her name was Naida? Interesting name for someone of her...stature. She dwarfs the other two quite easily. Kappa sure have variety...

[ ] "What's your culture like?"
[ ] "Where do you guys set up camp?"
[ ] "Do you know the white wolves?"
[ ] "Uhh...swimsuits?"
[ ] "Is she going to hold the stealing thing against me?"
[x] "What's your culture like?"

Well... things went rather typical: kinda badly. How the hell did he think womanizing was such a good idea with such a low Cha stat?
[x] "Is she going to hold the stealing thing against me?"

Priority #1: Tsundere Maintenance
[x] "Is she going to hold the stealing thing against me?"

Why hasn't anybody written a 10D themed CYoA? it's pretty much an untapped market.
[x] "Is she going to hold the stealing thing against me?"
[x] "Is she going to hold the stealing thing against me?"

"Of course I am."

Well, that was a simple answer to a simple question.

"It's not like I meant to, so what if I had a brief moment of stupidity... could you at least forgive that?"

"I'll forgive you once you gouge your eyes out and erase your mind of what happened today."

"I couldn't do that because then I'd have to do it over again since I need to know more about the kappa."

Hmm... did someone turn up your retard dial today?

"Ah, Ren is a little, how shall I say... sensitive about her structure, since despite being older then the rest of us, she is a little, well..." Taking another look at Ren, you guess you could understand. She's short, flat, practically an ironing board. What self respecting guy would be interested in that? Still no reason for her to be angry with you though.

"Well, it's not like it's anything I haven't seen before, so..."

Yeah, someone has been fiddling with that dial. Let's turn it down a notch and-

"What was that you sleazy pervert?!"


That was the first thing to escape your mouth as you felt the little girl's foot painfully crushing your nether regions. You would be impressed at her swiftness of getting to them if you weren't in such intense pain right now.


"Ren, stop that!"

Thankfully, her friends intervene without too much hesitation and drag the little pain train off of your junk. She's really pissed now, but you can't pay much attention to anything other then the insane agony you're in right now.

"Ugh! S-Sorry!"

"You dirty animal! Have you been spying on me!!"

"N-No!" You quickly clear your throat to readjust the pitch of your voice before continuing, realizing how off key it was. "I just meant that I've seen stuff like that before!" A thick silence hangs in the air as the three girls then look at you, totally weirded out. It... admittedly takes you a brief moment to realize what they're thinking of. "... a woman's body!"

Jeez... maybe you are too used to the tengu culture. Then again, you don't think you've ever actually seen a flat tengu before... or even one that's ended up as short as this lady. A lot of tengu tend to look the same, you guess, hence why you've grown tired of them. But as interesting as this variety is, you think you're quickly ruining your chances with getting on their good side...

[ ] Welp, time to abort. Back to camp!
[ ] You're fine, just act as if nothing happened
[ ] Maybe you'll have better luck with the white wolves...
[x] You're fine, just act as if nothing happened

Hahaha, awesome. I love this guy.
[x] You're fine, just act as if nothing happened

How did this guy get a reputation as a womanizer?
He womanized. Nobody ever said he was good at it.
[x] Maybe you'll have better luck with the white wolves...
-[x]Take a stop by that curse goddess as to reduce your misfortune... and DO NOT HIT ON HER.

>other votes
I thought this wasn't /th/. We had a chance to find out about the culture instead anon choose the derp option.
[x] Take a stop by that curse goddess as to reduce her misfortune of not having a boyfriend.
[x] Take a stop by that curse goddess as to reduce her misfortune of not having a boyfriend.

I'm amused.
[x] Take a stop by that curse goddess as to reduce her misfortune of not having a boyfriend.

We all know how this is going to end, but hell if it won't be worth seeing our "hero" make a fool of himself once again.
[x] Take a stop by that curse goddess as to reduce her misfortune of not having a boyfriend.

>>20850 said it best.
Who to say? The only reason something would end a certain way is if voters give up and give it the DoLF1 treatment. Oh yeah if anyone remotely cares about a non-stupid story, either vote against this tide or leave as these idiots will run it into the ground. I wonder if they'll have the nerve to call Sukima a shit writer afterwards.
Keep whining like this, and people are going to vote for stuff you dislike just to piss you off.

If they haven't already.
That'd just provoke more complaints.
[x] You're fine, just act as if nothing happened
yeah, I guess you have a point.
I want to see this guy actually have a successful interaction before the story is over
if people blame the writer for the voters fault in any CYOA that's akin to blaming the GameMaster because one of the players threw a hissyfit and threw the die into a garbage compacter: It's just fucking stupid.
[x] You're fine, just act as if nothing happened
weren't we trying to prove we had changed?
You and me at least, not sure about >>20847 though >>20851 though. They seem to assume things will end badly no matter what and thus they'll make it worse.
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[x] Take a stop by that curse goddess as to reduce her misfortune of not having a boyfriend.

That's right. There's something wrong with this image. You know exactly what it is too.

After excusing yourself from the lovely company of the kappa, you head further into the forest. There's a certain someone you need to find, and you know you'll find them after enough of following the stream. Sure enough, after enough walking, you see some dolls floating in the water rather conspicuously. Further down it is a young girl with bright green hair gently placing the dolls into the stream.

Wait, shouldn't the dolls be floating down the stream and not up it, where you first found them? Eh, details! There's but one thing on your mind right now.

"Excuse me, ma'am..."

"Eh? Ah, bonjour voyageur, comment allez-vous?"

... neh? What the hell is she saying?

"Uhh... I'm sorry, what?"

"J'ai dit, comment faites-vous aujourd'hui, jeune voyageur?"

"... quit that. That isn't even very good french."

"How do you even know that is french I am speaking? Aren't vous a japanese speaking person?"

"Then why am I speaking english?"

"Because this is a story for english reading people, and I am speaking a foreign language so as to sound more sexy, avez ma dérive?"

"No, seriously, stop that, it's not really sexy when it's not legit."

"Ah fine then. So what do I owe your visit to me to, then?" Jeez, girls and their... trends, you guess.

"Ah, but of course; to relieve you of your terrible lack of romantic interest~" In a gesture you find very nostalgic, the girl of green hair and ribbons giggles a bit before walking over towards you to see if you're truly so bold.

"Oh? Vous seems so confident in that... I wonder if your misfortune can keep up?" With a cocky, though somewhat timid grind, you give her your best words.

"Oh trust me hon', I got enough bad luck to rest you the rest of your life."

With those words, you proceeded to easily woo the goddess of curses into submission and finally got yourself a woman to call your own, truly. That, and the sex is god damn fucking awesome. You learned through such that maybe the french is kind of sexy, in it's own way.


Huh, that's weird... you get this vague feeling you're forgetting something...
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Haha, I forgot my misfortune.
Ah well. Hatate was a bitch and a half anyway. I'm fine with French loli end.
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I'm not.
Honestly if the story ends here for good, well there's more things worse than better in comparison to this.
That's not funny.
[x] You're fine, just act as if nothing happened

"So, uh... any other kappa that are as nice as you guys?" You're the first to break the silence after you stand up, and another one follows it after you say that, creating a very awkward situation for you after your recent blunder. But thankfully, after a while, at least one of them does say something.

"Uhm... I-I suppose you can say that." They're clearly afraid, and this is the last thing you want right now. If the kappa started running screaming from you when you bring Hatate down here, you'd never hear the end of it!

"I just want to meet as many kappa as I can so that I can introduce my friend to them, is all." Unfortunately, this only seems to heighten the fright inherent within the three kappa before you now. Though, you're beginning to think that maybe they're getting the wrong idea about who this 'friend' of yours is. "Maybe it would be easier if I just told you what my friend is like?"


A few more steps back and the kappa appear ready to run for the hills right away, as if you were about to rape them or something. Kappa sure are a timid bunch, you guess. This confirms that they certainly have the wrong idea about your friend.

"She's tall, very distinguished, a crow tengu like me, but she's really anti-social, so that's why I wanted to bring her out to meet new people." The three girls before you calm down after hearing this. Seemingly almost not believing you, but the kind kappa that called herself Nerina goes ahead and decides to be a little brave.

"So, your friend is a girl...?"

"Huh? Yeah, she is... what of it?" You see the girls whisper amongst each other for a few moments before breaking, with Nerina stepping forward.

"Alright, we'll help on one condition then, Mr. Satoru."

"Huh, what's that."

"That you promise not to come here again without her."

Eh... well, it wouldn't be the first time you weren't welcome somewhere.

A while later, you're following the three kappa girls as they supposedly head back to their base of operations. You agreed to their silly condition, which will start tomorrow. For now, today is reserved for plotting out what you will do with Hatate once you bring her here.

One thing you noticed, is that even the taller, bustier female amongst the group is still shorter then you are. You feel kind of silly now, feeling underneath them a while back.

"So your friend isn't used to company?"

"Yeah," you answer one of the kappa, continuing on, "she's really different from a lot of the crow tengu, not being overly boisterous, rather quiet at times, pretty sophisticated too... so she doesn't really get along well with any of the other crows."

"I see, sorta like you then?" Aha, it's nice to see that someone appreciates your change at least.

"Why yes, in fa-"

"That's a shame, crow tengu are more fun like that."

Guh. No respect, you feel. Absolutely none.

"Oh come on Naida, don't say it like that. Isn't it more advantageous for us if they're this way?"

"What do you mean?" You can't help but ask. Sure, you'd think sophistication would always be advantageous, but given your luck, you want to make sure.

"Us kappa are pretty shy ourselves, while a lot of us are pretty out going, loud behavior like that is pretty scary at times..."

"I guess it comes from living underground most of our time." Underground, huh? You feel a little shocked that you might have been correct with one of your earlier assumptions.

"You guys live underground then? Why?"

"Well, it's only technically underground." Just as Nerina finishes saying that, you notice that you and the group have stopped before the massive waterfall you passed by earlier. Everything is misty again. "This way, Mr. Satoru."

You carefully follow the kappa behind the waterfall, while promptly getting yourself somewhat wet, due to the sheer amount of mist you have to walk through. Before you know it though, you've successfully followed the kappa into a rather non-descript cave.

"Wow, never would've guessed this was here..."

"Yes, we're very good at hiding~" She says this like it's something to be proud of...

"So what're you gonna do once you bring your friend here?" You're asked a question as the four of you walk down an illuminated path further into the cave.

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"Well, you're gonna do more then just introduce her to people, right? That would be kinda boring on it's own." Would it really? You guess you're not too skilled in this socializing thing yourself, possibly.

"Uhm, I'm not sure really. I guess..."

[ ] Maybe the kappa cuisine would be interesting
[ ] What do the kappa do for fun, you wonder?
[ ] Possibly see the sights, the pond was rather relaxing
[ ] Do the girls have any suggestions?
[x] Possibly see the sights, the pond was rather relaxing
[x] Possibly see the sights, the pond was rather relaxing
Relaxing in a new, interesting place.. sounds nice...

Cracked up hard at the first friend line.
[x] Possibly see the sights, the pond was rather relaxing
[x] Possibly see the sights, the pond was rather relaxing

"Well, the scenery around the ponds was really nice... maybe we could relax around there for a bit."

"I thought you were taking your girlfriend out to meet new people, not on some mushy date." The apparently feisty Ren finally said something to you since the awkward swimsuit incident from not too long ago.

"It's not a mushy date!"

"No matter how you look at it Mr. Satoru, you won't find many people, particularly kappa, just idly in view out there." The nice one makes a point, however. Guh, maybe you should have thought that through a little bit more.

"Ugh... well, can't I have someone look around with us then?"

"You mean like a tour guide?"

"... y-yeah, exactly!" Truth be told, that wasn't what you had in mind, but it's a lot less dumb sounding then your first idea, which seemed more like a date with a third wheel...

"That's not that bad of an idea, but then wouldn't it be a better idea to ask those wolf tengu? They know the area a lot better then we do..."

"The wolves don't know the water as well as us either though~"

"But crows exploring the water...?"

"Yeah, they're no ducks or swans..."

"Can crows even swim?"

"I don't think they even have bathing suits..."

"Crows would probably treat it like some big hot spring trip, and get their feathers all ruffled when they realize how cold the water is."

The more the girls talk about it, the more like a bad idea this sounds. You need to come to a conclusion on this...

[ ] Maybe you'll just come alone with Hatate after all
[ ] Meeting with the white wolves sounds like a better plan
[ ] You'll do something else with Hatate involving the kappa
[x] Maybe you'll just come alone with Hatate after all

I still think it sounds nice.
[x] Maybe you'll just come alone with Hatate after all

It sounds so good, but MC is going to screw it all up again right?
It's not too late for
[x] Do the girls have any suggestions?
[x] Meeting with the white wolves sounds like a better plan.

I'm not sure about the kappa plan... as things didn't go generally well.
You are missing the point. Things are supposed to go poorly. Because it is funny.

Even if we did gain author mind-reading powers and pick the correct choices, the main character absolutely will not execute those choices flawlessly.
Makes me wonder how the story will end...
Have you ever heard of the saying, "If something is worth doing, it's worth doing well", and you forgot that instead of an intelligent choice (ask about the culture), they choose to ask more about the swimsuit theft incident. If it wasn't for that, then perhaps the whole thing could have went better.

I'd like to see the MC actually charm Hatate, not end up a failure. Next thing we know, you'll be voting to watch Bible Black with Hatate.

That's the second DoLF reference in my thread. Things are looking up!
I wanted to focus on Ren. I voted to focus on Ren. That was the intelligent choice to achieve my goal. Here, have a stupid metaphor
We bumped into you, spilling your milk. It landed straight in my cup. I'm drinking your milk. It tastes delicious~

I want to ~charm~ Hatate too. Difference is, I'm not going to care if we fail, cause ~losing is fun~

Thanks for the story, I'm enjoying it~ tilde-mode-off
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[x] Maybe you'll just come alone with Hatate after all

"Okay, okay, fine, maybe I'll just go alone around there with her."

"Didn't you say you wanted her to meet new people? We just got done telling you there ain't gonna be anyone up there half the time."

"I don't care anymore, alright? This is already turning sour."

"I'll say..." Seems your relationship with the taller kappa has gone a bit sour as well. Though, maybe she's right, you are being kinda stupid right now. But you're also stubborn so you're going to stick with it because what you feel is a good idea has to be, right?

"Now now, maybe it would be a good idea for us to stick around and wait for Mr. Satoru. We could treat it as exercise like we were doing when we first met him." Ren crosses her arms at Nerina's idea as the four of you stop in front of a massive cloth covering the entrance of what you assume is the kappa's village or whatever. You can hear the various sounds of machinery behind it, faintly.

"Exercise tomorrow? One day is enough!"

"You could use it, Ren." The little kappa growls at her much taller friend, though it's at this point inspiration strikes you.

"So then, what if the meeting were to be incidental, like it was earlier?" Nerina smiles brightly as the same wave of inspiration hits her too.

"Oh, that's a fantastic idea! If your friend saw you being friendly with people you don't know then it might make her feel more comfortable to do the same~" Hm, you hadn't actually thought that far but she might be right. This kid is kinda smart.

"I don't think I want to meet this guy 'incidentally' again..." Ren is also quite smart, in a rather different way though.

"Oh deal with it. I'm just trying to help a friend." You feel a bit fed up with the little girl's attitude already, though you are happy that you've come to a conclusion on this plan at least.

"So then, Mr. Satoru, what are you gonna do now? Since you're here, would you like to stay a while and get to know the town?"

"That would be great actually." You feel a bit more confident in yourself, hoping that you won't get into anymore trouble but excited to see a culture different from your own. You've reported on various things but as you've never really dawdled during work before, you never really got the chance to just enjoy the atmosphere outside the tengu camp before.

"Alright then~ I hope you enjoy your stay here, we're going to go back home and get changed ourselves, then we'll probably be at the market, so if you want to check back with us, we'll be there later, okay?" You give a quick nod to Nerina before she pushes aside the cloth for the four of you to enter.

What hid behind the cloth is a sight to behold. The cave is enormous! The town is easily as big as the tengu camp, which is huge to say the least, considering how many tengu there are. All hidden underground too... the place almost has it's own sky. Tons of lamps stringed together and held high over the town provide an eternal light to the underground community. What impresses you most however is the structure and what it's made out of. It's unlike anything you've ever seen before. Iron towers line the background, and houses of steel line the walls. Along side them are more traditional buildings which you quickly assume are used for more recreational purposes then the miniature factories that dot the city. It suddenly dawns upon you why the town feels like it has it's own sky when you see the various smoke stacks protruding from a few of the metal structures. Where is all that smog going? It's collecting on the ceiling, sure, but you would think that after a while it would inch it's way lower and lower until it hit the ground, but the air where you're standing is surprisingly clean. This is some high tech wizardry that you're looking at here. Who knew that the kapaa were so advanced? Do even the tengu know about this?

While you were gawking at the landscape, it seems your troupe of kappa have left you as they said. You're on your own now you guess. Well, when in rome...

[ ] There's only one place to go; the bar!
[ ] Check out that market they mentioned
[ ] You absolutely need to see how the industry works here
[ ] What other kinds of recreation do they have down here?
[x] What other kinds of recreation do they have down here?
[x] You absolutely need to see how the industry works here
[x] There's only one place to go; the bar!

I have no regrets. This is the only path.
[X] What other kinds of recreation do they have down here?

I could have voted for the bar, sure, but that was too indirect of a way to torment him, aiming towards overall failure without inducing immediate comic misery. In the absence of a means to force out more of Sukima's amusing descriptions of bald-faced social fail, I choose to instead aim him in the direction of being able to better woo Hatate's affections.
[x] What other kinds of recreation do they have down here?

Of course, what else would you do as a tourist then to see the sights and recreation? Things like drinking, gambling, drinking, playing, drinking, paying for hookers, drinking...

Hmm, actually, your idea of recreation is a little crude. That's gonna have to be another part of you that will need some refining, all for the glorious Miss Hatate. It's been a while since you're started, but you're still finding more and more ways to sophisticate yourself better for your future beloved. Although you guess recreation could be important as a couple... you've never really gotten this far with Hatate, so you've never really thought about it before. Well, okay, you did start reading books, and you've begun listening to music, but recreational things to do as a couple? You just never got that far.

Although thinking about it, paying for hookers would likely be an awkward thing to do with someone else anyways. It'd be more like watching someone else's back while they bury the body or something.

Maybe it's time you got off this subject and did what you were originally going to do, huh?

You walk around the kappa town for a bit... you try to avoid the industrial looking areas, since they look like they'd be bad for any sort of togetherness. Closer to the market sounds good, but you decide against wandering in because while shopping is certainly something a couple would do, they likely would not shop for things such as metal together in a very lovey-dovey fashion. Soon you stumble across a miniature waterfall... no, it's more like a large fountain, embedded in a wall. This is actually pretty nice, the air here feels cleaner then it did in the rest of the town. Perhaps the clean water keeps the inherent smog at bay. Looking into it, you can even see your reflection. This water is crystal clear and you're almost tempted to drink it, but that would probably spoil the cleanliness. You would dare not tarnish this spring water's beauty.

"Ehh, why hello there sonny." Suddenly, an elderly man appears. He's sporting a dish on his head... certainly a most old fashioned kappa. "Ain't ever seen you 'round here before. What's yer name?"

"Me? I'm Satoru, Crow Tengu."

"Ah, that's explains it. Ya know, we gots a good friendship with them tengu but they never really come by here."

"Is that so...?" Strange, why would no one come here? It's not the most beautiful place, but it has it's own unique charm. Explains why you never hear anything about it though.

"Ya seem mighty interested in the Shimo Fountain, it's got some legends attached to it, ya know?"

"Is that true, old man?"

"Oh yeah! The most famous one is of Shimo the Kappa, who the fountain was named after. His dearly beloved, who he hadn't confessed to yet, couldn't leave the village, but wanted to swim in water so very badly. So Shimo, being the resourceful type, dug a tunnel until he suddenly burst out of the ground, right here, striking water randomly! When he got back up, he saw his affection standing there in shock and awe, and he professed his undying love for her right then and there. Afterwards, e'rryone made a fountain out of the water Shimo struck and named it after him. They say any couple that confesses by the fountain will stay together forever!"

"R-Really?! Is that really true?"

"Course, they also say that if ya piss in it, it'll turn your gonads into silver! Ehehehe!"


You try to forget hearing that as a worried middle age couple drag their senile father off. It certainly has made you question the clarity of this fountain's water...

[ ] Well, onto the next spot
[ ] Ask someone more sane about the legend
[ ] Take a leak into the fountain... it must be true!
[ ] That's it, you're outta here
[x] Ask someone more sane about the legend
Learning about their culture.
[x] Ask someone saner about the legend

The piss option is tempting.
[x] Ask someone more sane about the legend

If we end up getting drunk here we better piss in the fountain
[x] Ask someone more sane about the legend
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.

We won't be getting any use out of this on the first date, but it's useful to keep in mind.
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.
..[x] Take a shit into the fountain. Maybe it will make your bowels poop nuggets. That will certainly be a good scoop for the rising newspaper. And a good income for family budget.
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.
..[x] Take a shit into the fountain. Maybe it will make your bowels poop nuggets. That will certainly be a good scoop for the rising newspaper. And a good income for family budget.
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.
..[x] Take a shit into the fountain. Maybe it will make your bowels poop nuggets. That will certainly be a good scoop for the rising newspaper. And a good income for family budget.
No seriously, what?

[x] Ask someone more sane about the legend

Emphasis on "sane".
I think it's time for a votespam check.
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.
..[x] Take a shit into the fountain. Maybe it will make your bowels poop gold nuggets. That will certainly be a good scoop for the rising newspaper. And a good income for family budget.
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.
[X] Do not despoil it under any circumstances.
[x] Ask someone more sane about the legend
-[x]Don't take to long, though, because it's off to the next spot with you.
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.
..[x] Take a shit into the fountain. Maybe it will make your bowels poop gold nuggets. That will certainly be a good scoop for the rising newspaper. And a good income for family budget.
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.
..[x] Take a shit into the fountain. Maybe it will make your bowels poop gold nuggets. That will certainly be a good scoop for the rising newspaper. And a good income for family budget.
[X] Ask someone more sane about the legend.
..[x] Take a shit into the fountain. Maybe it will make your bowels poop gold nuggets. That will certainly be a good scoop for the rising newspaper. And a good income for family budget.
I can't help but wonder where all these votes magically appeared from. Has there been a votespam check?
I'll second that. This ridiculous write-in is so popular, yet none of the voters say anything beside the vote?
Bullshit. I don't buy it.
[x] Ask someone more sane about the legend

Because wtf
I'm not even going to humor checking that for votespam. It's so downright obvious that someone is trying to troll me that it has to be intentional. They can do a number two in someone else's fountain though.

Watch it be someone buttmad that I (jokingly) wrote NTR

So that my post is not entirely disappointing, updates tomorrow! Hopefully.
This trend was before that, and perhaps in other votes.
[x] Ask someone more sane about the legend

Maybe getting a second opinion on this 'legend' is what you need. Hear it coming from someone who's more knowledgeable on the subject, and more importantly, less senile. Immediately your writer senses start tingling; yes, of course! Such a person would be most knowledgeable about it! You look around, circling the fountain a bit until you see a young man sitting on a bench facing it, apparently trying to write something on a large notepad. You know how it feels to be struck out of inspiration, being a reporter yourself, and you'd hate to interrupt this guy's train of thought, but this is important. A booty call and a potential lifelong romance hangs in the balance here!

"Excuse me, do you know anything about the legend of this fountain? Particularly the one about who it's named after?" The kappa writer looks up at you and decides to indulge you, finally showing signs that maybe your luck might be turning around.

"Oh, sure. A long time ago, before the fountain was created, a kappa named Shimo had his eye on another one named Manami. Manami was cursed with ill, so she wasn't allowed the leave the underground village, but she wanted to feel the splendor of swimming in the cold, fresh water outside of it. Wanting to make the girl's wish come true, Shimo went outside and found a small spring. He then decided to start burrowing through it, eventually hoping to dig up under the village and make a pond or pool for Manami to swim in. However, he made a grave error in guessing where the village was, and instead of digging under it, he popped out of a wall inside it, with the spring gushing forth behind him. As the water was being controlled, he realized that Manami had been passing by at that exact moment, almost coincidentally, so without thinking, he gathered up his courage, approached the girl, and confessed his love for her. Eventually, the two were married and the resulting fountain that came about Shimo's efforts was named after him. Since the fountain was built out of romance, the legend often encourages anyone who wishes to be romantically involved with someone, telling them that with enough effort, making anyone's dreams come true is possible."

If you had been sitting down, you'd be afraid that you might have fallen asleep part way into that story. It was quite long. But it was rather educational, not to mention touching. Really touching. You definitely feel like swooning Hatate is very much possible now. Your confidence has skyrocketed.

"I see, thanks a bunch. I'll be sure to keep that in mind."

"No problem. Say, you're a tengu reporter, aren't you? You think you could put in a good word for me? I'm hoping to be famous someday."

"Sure... what's your name, kid?"

"My name's Hotaru. Nice to meet you."

"Same, you can call me Satoru. I'll probably be here again in the future so if I see you, I'll be sure to say hi."

"Hey, thanks."

It's important for a writer to keep his social habits in check. A lonely, shut in writer is a writer doomed to suicide by lunacy. The toils and hardships of writing is something no one should have to go through alone and is one of the reasons why the tengu are even more social then ever before.

With your good deed done for today, you wonder what you should do next...

[ ] Look around some more.
[ ] Maybe meet up with the girls again.
[ ] There might still be time to visit the white wolves.
[ ] This is good. Back to camp.
[x] There might still be time to visit the white wolves.
[x] There might still be time to visit the white wolves.

We've got a whole dagblame mountain to show off before we can get that bird in our hand. Let's make sure we can do the job right.

Yeah, the troll(s?) voting to drop a deuce pretty much killed my drive for humorous self-sabotage. "Toilet humor" is an oxymoron, doods.
[X] Look around some more.
...[X] Remember Hina's thighs and get hard.
[X] Maybe meet up with the girls again.
...[X] Compromise yourself.
[X] This is good. Back to camp.
[X] There might still be time to visit the white wolves.

Wolf tengu are pretty cool, we should go glare at them
Wait. Does Hatate care about the white wolves? I forget.
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