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File 130495519863.png - (1.96MB, 1524x2156, Blink and kamehamehe.png) [iqdb]
6747 No. 6747
“I heard that when you die in extreme pain or sorrow, you become an evil spirit, only caring about his revenge. Now I'm asking you: are you in pain right now? Of course, you're laying on some rocks. That's not very comfy. But you had worse, right? Like, I don't know, when you fall on those rocks! I bet it hurts. Are you still feeling the pain? Does it still hurt? Hey, I wonder! If I can erase the pain, will you not be mad at me for scaring you? Won't you throw rocks at me if I … let's say 'heal' you. I don't really want to go into explanations.”
“Please...” Is all you manage to say. Mainly because you're badly hurt, but also because your jaw is broken. That's what you get for trying speleology without reading the manual! And maybe the rope was too short too. And maybe the rock was too hard.
You were trying to fix that hook, like you saw in that movie, but then, something asked you what you were doing, and, startled, you fell from the plateau.
That was a beautiful fall, by the way. Maybe you should have recorded it, and uploaded it on Youtube.

Oh silly you! That's right, you can't really move, since your bones are all broken! That hurts a lot, by the way. Not as much as when your mom caught you drinking beer in the family basement, but it still hurts. Thinking about it, you're wondering how will react your mother, hearing that you disappeared in a hole. Maybe she'll say something like:
“He disappeared? Lock your beer and your daughters!”
Yeah, obviously something like that.

“So, are you decided? Suits me if you decide to become an evil spirit, we're in shortage of them. Rin may pay good price for a new spirit.”
“Who's... Rin?”
“She's taking care of hell, torturing some spirits. Kinda like a caretaker, but more sexy.”
That's right, you remember the building's caretaker. As friendly as a space invader, and as sexy as a bearded woman.
“Please... Help me.”
Wow, your jaw wasn't broken in the end? My bad, I though it was. Fine, let's say your jaw is fine. But talking is still the only thing you can do. In short, you're shut in a cave, with... A GIRL? DEAR GOD, this is a paradise! There's a young girl near you!
Okay, she's blonde, and she's wearing some kind of weird dress, but it's a godamn girl! Quickly, stand up like a man, and show her who you are!

Oh, right. You're broken like a bunch of sticks. You're really useless, aren't you? There's an innocent little girl next to you, and you can't even molest her.
“Did you said 'help me'? Okay then, I'll bring you to the Earth Spirit's master.”
What a sweet little girl, she's probably gonna carry you bridal style, giving you the perfect opportunity to grope her, and then-
“But you're too heavy for me, I'll just drag you like this.”
Taking you by the collar, the girl start walking, still dragging your painful body over the thousands little sharps rocks that are making this cave's ground.

At this point, 'pain' isn't enough to express what you're feeling. You already begged for pardon from God, Allah, Yahveh, and several other gods. And you're obviously not arrived yet. It's even worse, since you're not being dragged in stairs. Aaaaah, if only you were masochist, things would be different, but you don't choose what you are. That's bad, isn't it?

The girl starts singing. For anyone else, it would be a nice song to hear, but for you, it sounds like some kind of horrible and disgusting torture method. It doesn't help that the lyrics are mostly “Ha, haa, ha-ha-ha, haaa”, looking awfully like “HAHAHAHAHA”.

By the time you're finally arrived, you already passed out, thanks to your brain. Okay, he was a little late to understand the situation, but when the pain was too horrible, he decided to disconnect you, and go play a tetris. You should thank him, you know? Thanks to him, you missed some nice pavements, more stairs, and a doormat with “Go away, thank you” written on it.


When your brain finally rage quit from tetris, you're laying, still on the ground. No more rocks, but woods pavements. Your back gonna aches tomorrow. But at least, your bones aren't broken anymore. Maybe it was just a dream after all?
“Hello there.”
Of course it's a dream! Why else would a cat talk to you? It can't be anything else than a dream! Look at this bird! A three-legged raven! It's obviously a dream, hahahaha!
Look here! A little girl with a red thingy attached to her body by some weird thingies! It's a dream! In five seconds, you'll wake up, just in time to watch your daily 'My Little Pony'. And everything will be fine! No more broken bones! No more drag over sharp rocks! No more talking animals! Just close your eyes and think 'it's a dream, it's not real'! Come on, do it!
“It's a dream, it's not real.”
“As it sad me to break your illusion, this is not a dream. This is reality.”
Says the little girls with thingies all over her body. Shut up, dream. You're the dreamer, You're the one who knows what's going on. You're closing your eyes. Open them, and once they're opened, the little girl will be totally naked.
“WHAT?”
Let's try this. Open your eyes, aaaaaaannnnnnnd... Disappointment. She's still dressed.
“WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOUR BRAIN?”
“Lady Satori, why are you angry after him?”
Ask the raven. After the talking cat, a talking raven. Logic. Or not. What's next? A chupacabra?
“No, but if you're interested, I have a Mokele-mbembe somewhere.”
Yeah. That's a dream.
“Rin, would you kindly explain him what's happening?”
Hey, open your eyes, because the talking cat is turning into a magical young girl, just in front of you. So open your eyes, you're missing all the fun!
“Utsuho, stay with Rin, and make sure he's not doing anything weird to her.”
Is she implying that you would do something harmful to that cute little girl? QUE NENNI! You just love little girl, they make you feel so good, when they're all around it makes you feel like you're the only guy in town!
“Utsuho, if he tries anything strange, you knock him off, and you being him back to me.”
The “Red-Thingies” girl is still thinking you're weird. You're not weird! You just had a bad day!
Having every bone (except your jaw) broken, being dragged over sharp rocks all the day, and finally witnessing strange transformation would be scary for anything else! You're not weird! They are weird!

Kinda like when you were in summer vacation. Other kids called you weird because you wanted to build a hut in the river. But thinking about it, it was the better place to build a hut, because you were protected against monsters, bunny witch, and other crazy peoples putting rocks in their socks for some strange reason!
Of course, the river was quite deep, and several kids drowned when they tried to build the hut, but it was still a good idea!
“This is wrong on so many level that I don't even know where to start.”
She's confused! Time to attack!

[] Get the hell away from that place! You're healed and stuff, you might be able to run like a cornish game! Whatever that means, it's obviously AWESOME!
[] Surprise attack! Go hide in the... sort of building they brought you in. They'll never look for you if you're hidden under their nose!
[] Kiss her for no reason! She's a little girl, it should be a good reason! If not, she's pretty! It works each time!
[] Convert yourself to satanist! And then molest a virgin because the Devil asked you to do so!
[] Do something stupid and/or funny! (write-in).
[] Ask them about your stuff, where you are, and the usual starting questions.
[] It's a dream! Since it's a dream, you can fly! Try to fly to the exit!

=====================

A short story I'm writing on a whim, for the fun. Don't expect regular update, and don't expect it to be serious. In short, don't expect anything.
Expand all images
>> No. 6748
[x] It's a dream! Since it's a dream, you can fly! Try to fly to the exit!
This story will fill my expectations. Or not.
>> No. 6750
[x] Ask them about your stuff, where you are, and the usual starting questions.
Since we'll be doing stupid things anyway let's at least try limiting them with votes a bit
>> No. 6751
[x] Ask them about your stuff, where you are, and the usual starting questions.

Default vote, because im unsure of what our mindset is supposed to be like...
>> No. 6752
[X] Ask them about your stuff, where you are, and the usual starting questions.
>> No. 6754
[X] Ask them about your stuff, where you are, and the usual starting questions.

Where the heck would Satori get a dinosaur?
>> No. 6755
File 130498048014.jpg - (183.88KB, 655x913, I would fall for this.jpg) [iqdb]
6755
[x] Ask them about your stuff, where you are, and the usual starting questions.

The girl is still confused! Time to strike! For glory, wealth, shit and giggles! Put yourself together, grab your balls, and ATTACK!! SHOW ME YOUR WAR FACE!
“WAZAAZAZAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!”
“?????”
It works pretty fine! She's even more confused! Now it's time to receive answer!
“Where's my stuff? Answer to me, or I'll scream!”
“That's the most ridiculous threat I ever heard. But anyway. Your stuff, as you said, is still on you.”
The enemy tries to confuse you! Don't give in! Don't look at yourself!

And you did it anyway. You fool. You're wearing a yellow suit, very suited for speleology. You also have a lamp, an- who the hell am I kidding?
You're not a speleologist, you're an adventurer! Just like in old legends, you're dressed like an adventurer! You have a whip at your belt, a rope around your chest, and a hat. The hat was completely unnecessary and makes you look like a fool, but it's cool so it's okay! You have large boot, even too big for you, but it's okay, because you can hide in those big boots of you! Like, for example, little rocks! Well hidden indeed! Nobody will ever look in your boots for them! Best hideout ever! If you have to play hide-and-seek one day, you'll obviously hide in your boots!

“Where's my self?”
Fumble on social skill! You can't even speak japanese, you moron! Now the magical girl-cat is confused, just like the three-legged raven, but the “red-thingies” girl is just fine! She's obviously wearing a magical object, granting +5 resistance to nonsense! That, or maybe she can read minds.

She's wearing a magical object, there's no other explanation. Your logical and Cartesian mind cannot accept a mind-reading little girl, so it's obviously a magical object!
“Well, in fact, I'm a sat-”
“LALALALALALALAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH I DON'T HEAR YOU!”
A magical object. Nothing more.

But yeah, back to the topic. Where are you? In a room, genius. What kind of room is your poor and temporary crazy self? Look like a hall. Underground.

Well, that's a dream, that's not supposed to make sense. Or maybe it's just you. Thinking about that, before putting your nose in this hole, you think you saw a bunny witch somewhere in the wood. You wonder what she's doing now. Probably beating the crap out of people with rocks and socks. Ha ha ha, as if. Silly you, you can't beat people to death with sock. Or maybe yes. You never tried anyway. You should try, someday.
“Lady Satori, why is he undressing?”
“I'm not sure.”
Oh! Right! There are peoples here! They must know where you are! You should ask them, don't you think? Looking at the “red-thingies” girl, you try to speak in some kind of awful language:
“¿Dónde estoy?“
“En mi casa.”
Oooh, so the girl speaks spanish! Good, very good! Too bad you don't know what “casa” means, something tells you it could help. Just like that time in Spain, where you were trying to survive in some kind of Hell. There were demons everywhere, speaking nonsense, like “Hola”, “¿Cómo es el clima?”, or even “¿Por qué estás durmiendo en ese bote de basura?”. Just thinking about it makes you scared.
BACK TO MAIN TOPIC! Where are you? After two unsuccessful attempt, you still don't know where you are. Maybe you should press F1 or something? Call the hotline? Beg Anon for direction? Ask the writefag what to do?

Silly you, you're not a story hero! You can't count on anyone else than you. You are alone, facing a dangerous situation. Dangerous meaning in this case: “being surrounded by two little girls, and a raven”. Very dangerous indeed. If a policeman were to come, he would gladly break your arms off, pull something sharp in your ass, and beat you to death with a gold trophy.
But you're a professional. You have standings. Standing still, standing motionless, for example.
Very good standings, by the way. The latter helped than you faced a saber tooth tiger, 25 years ago, in this museum. Like a hero, you stood motionless for 3 hours, until someone came and took the tiger away.
You were a hero. Even if everyone was repeating “it's a stuffed tiger, you moron”, you were a hero. No, you ARE a hero. You faced many dangers in the past, tax inspector, stepfather, the neighbor’s dog, your own wife. And you're still alive, despite everything! You're a motherfucking hero! You won't die so easily! So, try to figure where you are!
“You are in Old Hell.”
Woaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! D-don't be unfocused! She's playing with your mind! Focus on something! Think about something stupid!
“Lady Satori, why is he running in circle, singing 'paint it black'?”
“I have doubts, but I think he's trying to confuse me.”
DARN, SHE FIGURED OUT! Time to change your tactic, soldier! Now think about a brick wall. There's this wonderful and red brick wall. Think about the brick wall. There's a fly coming near the wall.
CRUSH THE GODAMN SON OF BITCHES FLY! DON'T LET IT GET OUT OF HERE ALIVE!
“Lady Satori, why is he moving his arms like that? Is he applauding you or something?”
“... Utsuho, this is getting tiresome, can you knock him off and lock him in a guest room, please?”
“I can easily!”

OH NOES! ANOTHER MAGICAL GIRL COME TO YOU! THIS IS JAILBAIT, DON'T BE- uh? She's not a little girl!
“What the hell is that piece of filthy crappy shit?”
“?”
“I wanna have my little girl! Tits, get out of this body right now! I exorcise you!”
“Lady Satori, he's trying to spit on me.”
“Knock him off.”

You are facing: MAGICAL CHICA MUJER RAVEN!
HP: ??
MP: this is not a RPG, idiot...
Level: you are doing it wrong.
Comment: the raven changed into a girl! This is an accident! You must investigate on that at once! But maybe after the dinner, you're hungry.


The magical evil woman walks to you, and try to punch you in the face! But you're not the godamn Eric, you know how to avoid a punch! Jumping and crouching at the same time, you manage to grae the deadly ubercharged punch!
Or not. Grazing your hair, the punch didn't damaged you, but stunned you. Doing your best to not fall, you don't pay attention to the girl whereabouts. Until she rise her leg, giving you a free pantyshot, and crushing your head with her granite boot.
You lost … some HP, but you're not dead yet! You're almost unconscious, but since that girl gave you a good look of her panties, that means she wants you to get into those panties! This is obviously the only explanation. Either that, either she was dancing at Le Moulin Rouge before it was ruined.
Trying to imitating Bruce Lee in Operation Dragon, you fall on your knees, grabbing both her legs, and you throw them toward the sky- ceiling, I mean.
Too late, you remember that it wasn't Bruce Lee who used that special move, but The Dragon. Don't matter, it worked either way, and the woman completely fails at landing fair, falling head first on the ground, leaving her bottom totally exposed.
Not wasting a single second, you quickly push her dress (she wasn't wearing anything when she was a raven, thinking about this... where did she hid those clothes), you managed to lay a hand on her panties before a fur ball lands- my apologies, crash on your back, scratching everything on sight, “sight” meaning in this case “you poor and bloody back”.

You're not a hero anymore, you're just a guy being defeated by a spitting sharply furball. How could this happen? Who's to blame? There are some, of course, who could be blamed more than other, but if you wanna be frank, if you're looking for the guilty, just look into a mirror. I know why you did it. I know you're afraid. Who wouldn't be? Magic, mind-reading little girls with red thingy hanging in front of their chest, women changing into raven...

This is just too much for you! There's only one thing to do in this situation!
Use the forbidden magic “Deux Ex Machina”. With this forbidden magic, you can avoid any explanation, and it will give you more time to explain why you tried to molest an innocent raven!

You pass out. Too many events, added to the blood loss, finally defeated your iron will.


When you finally regain your sense, you're in another room. A very nice room, by the room. Look like everything here is made of jewels. If you had a pickaxe instead of a whip, maybe you could gain something nice. Like jewels to trade, for example.
After a while, the door finally open, and the '''mind-reader'''' (you'll have to find another name, because this is impossible to read minds) enters. With a loving, or maybe hating glare, she speaks words of logic.
“Why did you tried to molest my pet?”


[] “I was kinda hungry.”
[] “The last female I saw who didn't tried to kill me was half-eaten.”
[] “I wanted to see if she was really like a woman.”
[] “That was self-defense. Don't blame, that's how I was trained.”
[] “42.”
[] “Obi-Wan Kenobi.”
[] “As it may sadden me to recognize it, my body is still working according to human standards, which means that I'm still moved by my basic needs, like eating, drinking, sleeping, and of course fucking. About this, are you free tonight? What about a pizza-sex evening?”
[] “You're the pet.”
[] “Anon did it!” (write-in)
>> No. 6756
>>6754
It was carried by a swallow!
>> No. 6758
>[] “Anon did it!” (write-in)

[x] "If you could read my mind, you'd already know that I have no idea."

So, logically then, she can't actually read our mind. Unless... the question is rhetorical, and she means to draw attention to this fact.

Fucking oracles, how do they work?
>> No. 6759
[X] "If you could read my mind, you'd already know that I have no idea."

So is the protag always insane, or is this just a coping mechanism seeing as he(she?) fell down a hole, broke every bone in his(her?) body, and saw a whole bunch of nonsensical things happen, such as magical transformations and defenseless little girls?
>> No. 6763
File 130502221397.jpg - (23.99KB, 300x300, pedobear_seal-300.jpg) [iqdb]
6763
[X] "If you could read my mind, you'd already know that I have no idea."
She's lying right? You thought she was a mind-reader, but she's not?! That's awfully strange! You should make sure before doing something stupid. Like thinking about your sexual habits.
“Can you really read my mind? Because I think you can't. Pussy.”
“I can read your mind. But you're not easy to read.”
“Don't insult me, girl! I has hackers friends! I can call for a pizza and make you pay for it!”
“You see, the human mind is shared in 3 parts. The Id, the Superego, and the Ego. Usually I'm only reading the Ego, others are invisible to me. But with you, the three are talking at once, which means that-”
“BZZZ! Headache!”
“Too much noise.”
“That's better.”
“Could you explain me why you tried to molest my pet?”
Her “pet”? What does she means by that? Pet... Does that means that she's giving them collars, and that she takes them on a walk? You're trying to imagine that girl holding that other busty woman with a leash. The mental picture is awfully ridiculous.
Don't lose your sight! She asked you a question! Focus... What was the question already? Something about bust, panties and girls?
“No, it was about YOU, and why you tried to molest my pet.”
“Well, I don't know. It happened a long time ago. I'm not living in the past. Living in the past leads you to be lonely.”
“It happened 10 minutes ago.”
“Past.”
“JUST 10 MIN-”
“It's past.”
“10 MINU-”
“LALALALALALA SORRY I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF HOW AWESOME I AM!”
“FINE! I'll just read your mind and figure that by myself, if you're acting like that!”
She's staring at you. Really hard. Like a kid trying to moves things with her mind. In a way, that's cute. In another way, that's creepy. Funny, it reminds you when your buddy Keith tried to sleep in a graveyard after losing a bet. He never told you what happened, but his hair turned white. Thinking about it, his behavior also changed completely. You lost him, after that. You wonder what happened to him. Is he still alive, despite what happened? Or did he died a painful and lonely from the hands of some monster?
Well, you're saying monster, but considering that most of them are looking like little girls, you wonder who's the real monster. It reminds that graffiti you saw several month ago, in a Chinese bathroom. It was written in engrish: “Real monsters are U.S.” You had a good laugh, thanks to that. Especially when you noticed that someone wrote under it: “No, China, YOU ARE THE REAL MONSTER”. And then you added: “And then China was a monster”. Just thinking about that makes you laugh.
“Allow me to ask you to focus on my pet, and especially on your molestation attempt”.
Bestiality is wrong, right? Even if a raven changed into a sexy and busty woman, it's still a raven, right? So doing “this” with a raven is wrong, right? So why did you tried? Were you too excited? Were you too curious? You don't know for sure. There were many reasons.
“Okay, I got it. I can't let you go near my pets.”
No need to be so serious. You're not really interested in pet. But mind-reading little girls, on another hand...
“Don't even THINK about doing it!”
Doing what? Doing 'that' and 'that'? Silly girl, you're the one who thought that!
“What?!”
Your thought were totally pure. The evil girl is the one who turned them into perverted thought! Perverted girl!
“What in hell?! You're the one thinking about that! This is just perverted! Especially for an male adult!”
Hugging girls is fine! There's nothing perverted about that! It's not rape. Or maybe it is? You don't know anymore, your mind is focused about something else: hunger.
“If it's that, maybe I can help you.”
She wants you to eat her? That's nice, but eating little girls is just not good.
“Not at all, but I can bring you something to eat.”
It would be very very nice. Of course, it would be even better if it was beans. With toast. All over the country, from coast to coast. People likes to say 'what do you like most?'. I don't wanna brag, I don't wanna boast, I always tell them, I like-
“TOAST!”
“I-I can manage this, I think. Bread is very rare in the underground, but a new recipe like this will be interesting for the whole house.”
“YEAH! TOAST!”
“Later then.”
The girl left! You're alone now! Time to run, coward! Find this evil dirty furball, and get revenge for your humiliating defeat earlier! No, wait, living in the past is awful. You don't want to live in the past. Find that furball, and kick her for fun! No revenge in that! Just playing some innocent game, called 'kick the kitty'!
Let's go at once! Once the door is unlocked! Because it's locked! She's not trusting you! That evil girl! She locked you! She thinks you're going to run in that... building, creating chaos for the fun! She's totally right, but she could let you create just a little chaos before locking you! Damn you, girl! Why are so you smart?
Maybe because she can read minds, uh? You guess that makes sense. Just like your own mind is playing tricks on you. For example, you could swear that you saw another girl in this room, and, yet, when you search closely, you don't find anyone else than you.
And yet, you're sure you saw someone else. You must lure her out of her hideout! To achieve this, you have several ways! Scream like a banshee and make her jump out of her skin! Scream like an ork and scare her shirtless -or is it shitless? Scream like a stupid human, making her laugh, allowing you to find her!
Because THERE IS A GIRL IN THIS ROOM!
Okay, she's invisible or some shit like that, but you KNOW there's someone else. Not a Horla, but a girl! Well, you think it's a girl, because everyone so far was female, and was more or less small!

Time to strike!
[] Scream.
[] Scream.
[] Scream.

================

Forgot to proofread.
>> No. 6764
[x] Scream.
The first one.
>> No. 6766
>>6750
... I was wrong. I'll be choosing the dumbest possible options from now on. Can't go wrong there
[x] Scream.
The shirtless second one.

References! References everywhere! Well I can see you played Irisu Syndrome but try to... oh fuck it you won't listen anyway
>> No. 6767
File 130504317473.jpg - (70.40KB, 640x480, FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.jpg) [iqdb]
6767
>>6766
Too late I already reached 20K.
>> No. 6768
>>6766
... not overdoing it? I'll try if it makes you happy, my dear.
>> No. 6769
[x] Scream.

Nuff said
>> No. 6770
[X] WAAARGH!!!
>> No. 6772
[X] Scream

>'kick the kitty'!
You monster.
>> No. 6774
File 130511807010.jpg - (29.04KB, 249x165, sample-14ef555e355de172d0270d3a7c8180fd.jpg) [iqdb]
6774
[x] Scream.

It's screaming time! Of course, screaming is an art. There's screaming and shouting. What do you want is screaming! Kinda like showing your war face! That's what you plan to do! You're not shouting after a dog or a kid! You're screaming at an enemy!
Breathing hard, all your cosmos going to your lungs, you scream.
“WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!”
The whole room shakes. The door explodes into pieces. Your shirt too. But that's not important! Well, you kinda failed, since the mysterious girl is still not here, but at least the door is opened! Everything went better than expected!
Leaving the room, you quickly run through the corridor, looking for an exit. You don't want to stay here. There's so many strange things here, even by your standards. So, just saying, but you should keep on running until you're out!

You see a big door. You run to the big door. You crush the big door with a merciless “Shoulder Crush”. It's effective! The door is blown to smithereens! You keep on running, because stopping running would means 'thinking about your current situation' and you don't want this!
You left the building, jump over the stairs, and reach some kind of weirder town. Inhabited by horny peoples. You mean 'horned people', right? Whatever, just don't stop running!
Run to the far land! Run until you reach it!
“He dud stop y rit her.”
Says one of those horned monsters! But you don't have enough time to listen to him, and therefore to understand what kind of horrible language it's using! Looking over your shoulder, you see that he's running after you! And other are joining him as well! What's that, a hunt? Are you some kind of rabbit to chase after? Are they going to eat you once they catch you?
Unfortunately, you're quite tired. On other word, you don't stand a chance against those horny- horned monsters! Unless of course they're drunk, but it's … Okay I take back what I said.
Looking one more time over your shoulder, you can't help but giggle. The first one running after you walked on something, fell on the ground, and the others fell on him as well. If you had a camera, you could take a picture. But all you have is a hat, and a whip.

Finally several minutes of running around, you decided to hide in a so conveniently-placed hot spring. At first, it seemed to be a stupid idea, hiding in a hot bath while being fully clothed, but thinking twice, it's actually quite clever! Nobody will suspect that! Nobody will think you're stupid cunning enough to use suck a clever trick! You're a freaking genius, boy!
Of course, you're slowly boiling to death in this bath, but at least, nobody is running after you anymore. You decide to wait several minutes to be sure. But after 20 secs, you decide that being eaten is better than being boiled alive.
You jump out the bath, trying to sneak into an alley. Alleys are dangerous place, whatever the country, and that's why it's clever to hide in such a place. Everybody will look for you in safe place, and they won't look here ever!

Thinking about it, maybe the hot bath was unnecessary. Bah, you're clean now, that's important!
Well, you were clean, until you bumped into something.
“Look out, you.”
You fall on your ass, in some kind of disgusting barf, while the girl fall against a wall, managing to stay on her feet.
“Watch where you're walking, you...”
What a beautiful girl. She's smaller than you, but she's got a pearly white skin, silver hairs falling on her shoulders, and a wonderful face. Good lord, if you weren't underground, you could swear you're facing an angel. The only problem is that she looks seriously annoyed right now.
“Hey, you're not supposed to see me, you know?”
“Obviously I don't. Because I see you right now.”
“Really? Repeat after me: 'I don't see you, I don't see you', come on, do it.”
“Sounds like a bother. Do not want.”
“All righty then. What about coming back with me?”
“You want me to cum with you? OKAY!”
That was a proposition, right?
“Nooo! I want you to follow me!”
“You want me behind you? Okay.”
“I don't know what's wrong with you. You're worse than me! But if I manage to bring you back, Sister will explain and give me some cake.”
“The cake is-”
“I already know this one. Now don't you want to come back?”
“NO!”
“And now?”
“NO!”
“Yes?”
“NO!”
“Yes?”
“NO!”
“No?”
“YES!”
“Okay then.”
What just happened? That girl manipulated you so easily! How could this happen?

Following the girl blindly, you're quickly back into the mind-reader's building. Soon enough to witness an heart-warming display of sisterly love.
“Siis! I'm back!”
“You left five minutes ago. It can hardly be described as 'for a long time', you know?”
“I knoooow! I'm just happy to see you again, siiiis!”
“Did I mention you how much I hate when you call me like that?”
“I forgot!”
“What's this with you?”
She speaking about you. That mind-reading little girl is speaking about you in such rude words.
“Blowing the main door is ruder when referring to you as 'this'. And I have a name.”
She was the on who locked you away in the room. That TINY room. You look at her so sadly, and like a small animal, you say:
“I didn't make too much noise did I, honey?”
“When you screamed like that? You did too much noise.”
“Come on, sis, he was just looking for me.”
“WHAT? You were with HIM in the SAME ROOM?”
“Yes.”
“Yes.”
“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY SISTER?”
Says the mean-looking mind-reader with a name. She's angry. Perhaps. Or not. Or maybe she's bad at showing emotions. Maybe she's happy about that. But she's not showing it.
“I'M NOT HAPPY AT ALL!”
She's still screaming. Aah, she's soo happy. You're crying manly tears of happiness.
“Sis, don't yell at him, you're making him cry.”
The white-haired girl's col tone seems to calm down the mind-reading girl.
“Koishi, there's some cake in the kitchen. Help yourself.”
“Yahoo!”
Running for the cake, your living shield let you alone in front of an angry mind-reading girl. Or maybe she's still happy.
“Now, listen to me, and closely, because I won't repeat it twice. My name is Satori Komeiji. Do not forget it.”
Your basic japanese skills let you undertand what 'komeiji' means. It means 'little meiji'.
“Totally not what's important. What's important here is my sister. For some strange reason, she's interested in you.”
And you're interested in her too, but perhaps not for the same reasons. While her interest is probably pure and white, yours is... PURE AND WHITE TOO.
“Too late, I read that.”
Crap. You're done goofed.
“Now listen to me. My sister, Koishi, is my important sister. I won't let you corrupt her, or do anything to harm her, got it?”
Corrupt? What does that means? Lending money? She doesn't want you to lend money to her sister? Easily done, since you don't even have money to begin with.
“Okay, that's enough. If you disappear now, Koishi won't be sad, that's all.”

You are facing: SATORI KOMEIJI, aka MIND READING GIRL.
HP: Many.
MP: Maybe...
Level: 4.
Comment: Satori wants you dead, for some strange reason. She's obviously a complete monster who kills peoples, eat babies, and rape virgins for fun! You have to defeat her! But during the fight, she'll summon a level 5 cat, and a level 6 raven if her HP are too low. You must one-shot her! Good luck, and don't be afraid of dying, there's a discount in the mortuary!


[] Attack:
-[] Hand fight the enemy with your bare hand. Martial arts gives you bonuses.
-[] Use WHIP use an object to upgrade reach, rate of fire, and damage. Cannot be used with martial art.
[] Magic:
-[] Confusion Confuse the enemy. It may hit itself in confusion.
-[] Time stop Stop time for 3 seconds, allowing you to enter another command.
-[] Frenzy Anger the enemy, canceling any order or tactic. A frenzied enemy uses only physical attacks.
[] Summon:
-[] Giant Monster Hat Change your hat into a monster.
[] Flee the fight Doesn't work against bosses.
>> No. 6775
[x] Summon:
-[x] Giant Monster Hat Change your hat into a monster.
>> No. 6776
My bad, I forgot to say: what's you're voting for isn't a command, but a gneral behaviour. Which means that if you vote for only one thing, FAGanon will not try anything else. Au contraire, voting for [summon] and [attack] will have FAGanon trying to punch Satori if he can't summon the GMH.
>> No. 6777
[] Magic:
-[] Time stop Stop time for 3 seconds, allowing you to enter another command.
-[] Confusion Confuse the enemy. It may hit itself in confusion.
>> No. 6778
[x] Magic:
-[x] Confusion Confuse the enemy. It may hit itself in confusion.

We shall free her from the bonds of common sense.
>> No. 6779
File 130516770457.jpg - (75.61KB, 915x968, ec15486dd59253547c49052400e926d2.jpg) [iqdb]
6779
[x] Magic:
-[x] Confusion
-[x] Time stop
[x] Summon:
-[x] Giant Monster Hat

She wanna fight? Fine. Time to get quarter-serious! Because someone might get hurt if you're totally serious! Last time you tried, you killed that guy! So no need to be serious for a little girl! Just use your head! You're a freaking genius, guy!
There are some nice tricks you could pull off, you already know that. But they'll need time. Unfortunately, the angry Satori in front of you will probably not let you prepare your dirty trick! So you have to use another dirty trick to use your grand dirty trick!

You think about a raven, and you scream “OH LOOK A CHUPACABRA!” while pointing over Satori's head. Receiving different messages, she freezes. Letting you just enough time to take off your hat, throwing it in the air.
Then, you crouch, and you begin to whisper rapid incantations. Satori understands your plan, and attack you!
Satori uses “THIRD EYE ATTACK”. The world is slowly dissolving into a black and red mess. But you stand firm! You must finish the incantation before the hat touches the ground, or else it won't work!
“Mayeth the Lordeth had mercy on my enemy, because she's gonnath geth her ass whipped for gooth.”
Finishing the incantation just in time, you grab your falling hat, and you slam it to the ground!

But nothing happens. Of course, you're a doctor. Not a summoner. That was stupid from you to even try. No monster, no god. Just you. And that Satori. But thinking about it, it worked fine on Satori. Look at her, she's confused! She even hits herself in her confusion! She's slamming her hand into her face several time! She's losing lot of HP! That's obvious!
Okay, confusion disappeared. Plan B time. What was plan B? Running around imitating a chicken? Let's not do this. What's plan C? Stopping time? Why not?
You look straight at Satori.
“I love you Satori!”
Okay, she freezes again. You have 5 seconds to move. You decide to:


[] Flee.
[] Flee.
[] Flee.
[] Surrender.


“Okay, so what now? I can't even let you two together?”
The white-haired angel is here again. With a mouth full of sugar. Watch out for diabetes, girl. You should have some insulin near.
Looking at her sister in disbelief, the white-haired girl keeps speaking:
“Really, Sis, you should trust people more. Just because he's crazy doesn't means he's dangerous.”
“I can't read his mind. Nor can you. He can't even read his own mind. Therefore he's a danger for everyone, including himself.”
“And how do you want to fix that? By killing him?”
“I do not plan to fix that. He's a human. Humans aren't us.”
“Aaaaaw, come on Sis. He's interesting at least.”
“You do not see him as a human, do you? The only thing interesting you in this human is his madness.”
“Yep! You see, I scouted him earlier, after I opened my third eye for a bit. He wasn't crazy to begin with! He became insane after.”
“I still fail to see how it's concerning us.”
“You're not curious?”
“Not at all.”
While the sisters are talking, you're preparing a new cunning plan to establish your new dominion over this strange building. While picking your nose. Yes, it's possible to pick your nose while making up perfect and cunning plan!
You can't help but think that somewhere, someone is speaking about you. But why should you bother about that? It's not like they're planning to kill you!
“In short, let me kill him!”
“Sorry, Sis, he's funny. Let me keep him for a while.”
“... Fine. But if he does something to you, I'll order Utsuho to beat him to death, and then I'll order Orin to torture him for a endless eternity.”
“Pleonasm.”
“Excuse me?”
You gain the Evil Sisters' attention! Watch your language, or you may die a painful and horrible death!
“Endless eternity is a pleonasm.”
“...”
“...”
“Your conclusion, Koishi?”
“He's right. It's a pleonasm.”
“I'm not talking about that.”
“I'll go, see ya later!”
“No, wait!”
The white-haired girl is moving out. You decide to follow her. Because she's pretty. And because it gives you a good excuse to avoid being with this homicidal maniac Satori.
“WHY YOU!”
You're fattening up, you know? You should run, just in case. Losing useless weight, gains more muscle. You never have enough muscle. And even if you're tired, being chased by an angry girl armed with a red thingy is a good motivation. It's not like she's dangerous, but you don't really want to check if she can harm you. She possibly can, because earlier she changed the world.
Speaking about that, you're still seeing the world in red and black tone. Is that normal? You don't really care. The only important thing is following the white-haired girl. Nothing else is important.

Why do you want to follow the white-haired girl? You don't know. But it has to be important, since it's in the script. Well you think it's in the script. You couldn't read it before. You should ask God to let you read your life's script. Could be interesting. Or not. Whatever You should really stop with that metaphysical crap. You're not good with that. Especially when your logic is to evaluate your chance to kill the person facing you. Happens every time. Perhaps you're paranoid or something. Perhaps you just want to kick asses. Or perhaps you're a dumbass who's using too many 'perhaps'. Doubt and regrets lead to an awful life. Don't forget this, maggot. Never look back. Right now you're following a girl for some reason, and she's leading you to a remote place. If you were some kind of predator you would pounce her right now and have your way, but you're curious. Besides, pouncing little girls is animal-like. No, it's better to flirt before.

Wait a minute, when did you decided to flirt before sleeping with a girl? Fives minutes ago? That's a good answer. Come on now, commodore! This road will not walk itself over!
“Wat ar yoo doin dud?”
Oh, there's a sentry. Not letting you pass. You try a basic approach.
“Can I pass?”
“No.”
It's time to use another tactic. Because there's an horned guy guarding this... hole in the wall. The white-haired girl left here, so you have to pass too. But there's this party-pooper guy.

What to do?
[] Remove the sentry.
[] Sweet talk.
[] Bribe him with:
-[] WHIP.
-[] HAT.


=======================

04:31 AM. Tired as fuck. Too tired to proofread. Apologies. No good picture. Not my computer. Fucking dog makin noise when I try to sleep. Think it's Slenderman each time. Shit ain't scary during the day. Different at night. heard something outside. Gonna check. Back soon.
>> No. 6780
[X] Sweet talk.

Let's show that big ol' brute our sensitive side.
>> No. 6781
[x] Remove the sentry.
Let none stand in our path!
>> No. 6782
File 13052254162.jpg - (79.88KB, 404x615, portrait_sentry-large.jpg) [iqdb]
6782
Also, the sentry we're talking about DOESN'T look like that AT ALL.
>> No. 6783
[x] Remove the sentry.

Not taking "no" for an answer.
>> No. 6785
File 13052406724.jpg - (21.00KB, 400x400, There\'s a fly in my room.jpg) [iqdb]
6785
[x] Remove the sentry.

Hell no! You're not going to be stopped by an horned sentry! For you, it doesn't matter if this sentry is a human, a demon or a god! You'll crush it like an insect! Pointing over the sentry's shoulder, you scream:
“Hey what's that?!”
Surprised, the sentry shows you his back. Critical error! In a flash, you take your whip from your belt and, holding it like a rope, you jump on the horned guy, strangling him with your whip.
“Aaargh, disgutin sneeky caowhard!”
He moves and moves, trying to crush you against the wall, trying to throw you on the ground, but you hold him tight, and, breath after breath, he loses consciousness and fall on the ground. You keep the whip in place for several minutes, to be sure he's not acting. Then, you listen. He's breathing!
He's still alive!
Putting your whip back to your belt, you grab his neck with your left hand, his chin with your right hand, and you tuuuuuuuuuuuuuurn.
CRACK.
Yeah. Like this, he won't be a bother anymore. You successfully removed him! Congratulations! You decide to let the body here. He'll be discovered soon enough, but that doesn't matter. You're probably not supposed to be able to pick a fight with one of those horned guy to begin with, so nobody will suspect you!
Anyway, you've done playing, you now have to follow this cute little girl! She obviously went this way, so just follow her and it'll be fine!

Heeeeyyyy, niiiice! You found a city! An underground city! It could be beautiful if you could see the sky! You don't know why, but you miss the sky! The blue sky. You gave it a name, do you remember? You called it Mister Blue Sky, like in that song! You miss it! But whatever, don't bother about the pass! Look in front of you! Never look up, never look down! Walk to your destination!

Walking in the city, you can't help but think about the past. You found yourself lost somewhere in Spain, totally alone. Following your guts more than anything else, you decided to walk to Asia. After weeks of walking under the sun, you saw more horrible things than you ever wished to. In the end, you decided to travel by night. Only to learn that night is worse than day.
After weeks, you forgot everything. Your name, who you were, what you were doing. You were first scared by this, but with time, you decided to give up on everything who could describe you as “human”. You gave up on intelligence, following only your intuition. And it kept you alive so far. But alone.
And now, everything's different. Your intuition tells you to be with this girl. Maybe she can help you, or maybe she'll be your demise. All you know is that she's important to you. Not in a physical sense, even if you would like to find a suitable woman here, but rather in a psychical sense.
Of course, your mind is a complete mess -sometimes you're aware of that, but often you don't care-, but you're still driven by your will to live. If you must reject logic to live, then you'll reject logic. If you must reject reality to live, then you'll reject reality.
Anything to be alive. It could be your credo if you weren't so focused on the immediate situation.

And the immediate situation is: you're more or less following a strange girl, sometimes as visible as your own nose, and sometimes totally invisible. You have to be careful anytime to not lost view. Losing her is unacceptable. That's why you watch her, very closely.
Closely enough to notice that she's stealing from shops she's visiting. You don't really care, since it's not your shop, but it is indeed a strange fact. Looking at her house-or-building-or-whatever-the-hell-it-is, you though that she was rich. Does she really have to steal to live? Or is she doing that on a whim?

Screams. Desperate screams. Angry screams.
There's something wrong. Something terribly wrong.
THIS IS AN UNEXPECTED SITUATION! You must investigate at once, so let's go!
Leaving the shop, you walk to the source. There's a crowd of horned people. They are strange, but 'strange' is becoming 'usual' really fast with you.
Sneaking in the crowd, you hear voices speaking.
“Hez dead forivair!”
“Ow coul tis happen?”
“It has to be tat satori up heer!”
“Yeah!”
Oh wow. Really bad. They're suspecting Satori. Maybe you should explain them that she can't do that kind of- BWAHAHAHA who are you kidding? You don't give a damn about Satori! She's hostile toward you for not reason! She's a past person! You shouldn't bother with people living in the past! They are all crazy, hugging dead kids while repeating 'it'll be okay, it'll be okay'. You already faced several before! They aren't good at all! The only thing you can do for them is shortening their suffering by shooting them in the head!
Well, you're thinking that, but you were unable to kill anyone! All you did was leaving them to die, you COWARD! Do you EVEN deserve to live after THAT?
Well, you did your best to survive. You should be proud of that. Even when everyone else was mad or despairing, you were still here, fighting death with all your strength! And you won, since you're still alive!

You survived more than this. And you're going to survive this! Even while the crowd is running to Satori's palace, you follow them without even thinking! Good! Wait, not good! They're reaching the main door! It's time for you to slow down, leaving them fixing their problems.




Times passes. Grass grows. Trees too. And you? You're running. You should have seen this coming. First, the mob went after Satori, and then they raided the mansion, while Satori and her pets managed to escape. You decided to not give a damn about that, so you returned in town, only to discover that the white-haired girl disappeared too. Half-panicked, you investigated, to find her trapped in some kind of complicated device. Like a mouse trap, but less deadly and more humiliating. You're not going to describe what you saw.
After breaking the trap, the girl, oblivious to you, continued walking around, sometimes taking this or this from shops. And then, the horned guys came back, and they saw both of you, raiding the town. Saying that they overreacted would be an understatement. They chased you.

Result of this? You're now lost in some cave. Terrible memories including your sorry back and lot of sharps rocks are looping in your head. But you decide to NOT GIVE A FUCK. You're a MAN, not a whimpy wimp.


But even a man like yourself needs to establish a plan before going further. So let's review the situation. You're lost. You don't have any source of light. You're in a lost cavern. Maybe you could even consider this place as a labyrinth. Thankfully, you still have your hat and your whip.

[] Light is more important. Find it first.
[] Find something to eat.
[] Find the girl first.
[] Find Satori to assist her. HAHAHAHA no.

================

Edited it a little bit. Still haven't got enough time to do a complete proofread. Dammit. Story gets dark from now on. Can change. In both sense. Choose wisely.
>> No. 6786
[x] Find the girl first.
>> No. 6787
[x] Find the girl first.
>> No. 6788
File 130530947987.jpg - (482.92KB, 648x906, This is what whip are for.jpg) [iqdb]
6788
>same vote twice
>only 1h24 between them
>no comment
>no "what happened?"
?
...
Okay...
Update will be coming tonight.
>> No. 6789
>>6788
I didn't think additional information was necessary. not sure about the other guy though.
>> No. 6790
File 130532357729.png - (510.31KB, 600x720, Mikoishi.png) [iqdb]
6790
Update is delayed. For many reasons. I'm not going to turn this thread into a blog, so to be short, I'm waiting to see how the wannabe-banwagon on /th/ will turn out.

Have this cute picture of Koishi to help you.
Haaa, Koishi, you are so cute.
>> No. 6791
>>6790

Just quit while you're behind over there on /th/.
>> No. 6804
>>6790
You really don't have to wait. You're welcome to get out and never come back any time. Y'know, as long as it's soon.
>> No. 6817
File 130571399389.jpg - (165.98KB, 766x956, Your head.jpg) [iqdb]
6817
[x] Find the girl first.

What are you? A coward? No! You're a MAN! You don't even have to hesitate! You DECIDE! You will find this girl again! You don't know why, but it must be important, so you WILL do so! Heard that?!
“YES!”
So GO!

You know what? Mister Headache wants to remind you that you're lost in a dark cave, with no sense of direction. In short, you don't know if you're standing or lying.
Find a solution. Quickly.

You remember what your father told you the first time you went to work.
“Don't screw up, asshole, because I'll kick you from the house if you get fired!”
No, not this one! The other thing he told you!
“If, one day, you're too drunk to figure if you're facing the sky or the ground, piss on yourself. Gravity will tell you what you're facing.”
Thank you Dad! You were always a drunkard, but you gave some good tips!
...
Okay, so you're facing the sky. It really helps! But now you're wet and cold. You must find this girl quickly, and start a fire somewhere, or you'll catch a cold.

After hours walking totally randomly, you understand something crucial.
You're lost. Perhaps walking totally randomly isn't a good idea. You must prepare a cunning plan. Or a way out. Both are fine.
It's time to use an old famous spell.
“HEEELP!!”
It should work. After all, you screamed loudly enough to-
“He's here!”
Attract even horned peoples here. Fuck. Whatever you plan to do, you should decide pretty quickly. Because if those guys coming after your ass are really horned, your long and strange life will end very soon.
But, running is cowardly! What are you? You are a MAN! Look at me in the eyes! You are a motherfucking MAN! No, you're more than a man! You're a hero! You will fight for freedom, peace, and cheese!
Attaaack!!
“You're safe, wonderful! Lady Satori wants to see you!”
Oh, it was just a pet. Too bad, since you were ready to FIIIGHT!

Perhaps fighting was the best idea after all. Facing that mind reading Satori girl is almost frightening. Not as scary as throwing a billboard on a teacher, but still... Funny, it reminds you something who happened a long time ago, where your buddy Watson asked you to throw a cutter to a teacher. You don't remember if you really did it. But you remember that Watson was arrested two weeks later. Thinking about that, you never saw that teacher again. Did he-
“HEY! Pay attention to me!”
Satori is angry. You wonder why. Does it have something to do with the fact that you followed her sister while she was kicked out from her own house? Being kicked from somewhere must be a traumatic experience, you know what you're talking about. While you were studying biology in university, you were kicked out your room by a bunch of drunkards. But the worst came later, when you discovered that they puked everywhere, even in your bed, but also because they stole all your porno mgazines! What a bunch of bloody bastard!
“Yeah, right, but what about those onis? Do you know why they were so angry?”
Onis? What is that? Is it edible? Does it taste like marshmallow?
“Let's say the horned peoples.”
Oooh, so those horned guys are called 'Onis'? Sounds cool. Back then, in Europe, they would be called 'Chernabogs'. Not that it really matters, but-
“Why are they angry?”
You don't know, do you? You think it has something to do with butterflies flying all around. Or maybe with jewels.
“...Fine, you can go.”
You wonder what she's going to do now. She lost her mansion, she lost everything. Except her pets.
“That's very nice from you. I guess I'll stay underground.”
Why staying underground? But there's no sun underground, therefore it's stupid! Besides, there are onis down here. And they're not good for health. Especially if they decide to go chaos after your ass. Not that you mind about running after her ass, but you know-
“I can't leave the Underground.”
She says nonsense. Maybe she's crazy? Is she more shocked than you thought at first? Maybe she's acting like she's not really affected, but, truth to be told, she's traumatized?
“It's just a deal. We don't go to the Surface.”
And why is that? Because stuff happens, grass grows, and you, you're looking for something.
“Because we were banished from the Surface by humans and youkais alike.”
If it's just that, it can be fixed. After all, you didn't saw lot of youkais (whatever they are) while you were walking. And about human.. Well the last human being you saw was in China. And he was completely crazy. You don't think they will be troublesome. In short, you think she can go to the surface. Nobody will complain. Nobody can complain, in fact. Because they're all dead. Well, not all, but you really wanna see other peoples. Hornless one, if possible.
“What's this on your pants?”
LET'S GO!

[] Let's go to the Surface! You don't know how, but you will lead them to a better life! Because, truth to be told, Satori is a awfully pale! And her sister isn't better! In fact, you wonder if they are vampires or something!
[] Change your pants before.
>> No. 6818
>If, one day, you're too drunk to figure if you're facing the sky or the ground, piss on yourself.
....

[x] Change your pants before.
Not sure how or with what, but better than smelling later
>> No. 6821
[x] Let's go to the Proofreader! You don't know how, but you will lead them to a better update! Because, truth to be told, this post is a awfully terrible! And the last one isn't better! In fact, you wonder if they are unedited or something!
>> No. 6823
[x] Change your pants before.
>> No. 6824
>>6821
There is no proofreader
>> No. 6842
[x] sage Hartmann's shit
>> No. 6867
File 130616881553.jpg - (68.17KB, 399x265, Meanwhile in Eientei.jpg) [iqdb]
6867
[x] Change your pants before.

“Okay, then I'll show you the surface!! But before that I need to buy new pants!”
You show your back to Satori. You need other pants, and there's only one place to buy them! The city you just left!
“Hey, hold on, where are you going?”
Buying new pants, why else? That's so obvious, and you though she was a mind-reader, hahaha what a joke!

After several minutes of walking in darkness, fives headaches, and a little crying about world's cruelty, you finally found the horned people's city. For some reason, you remember something about this city. You can't remember it yet... Bah, it'll come later.
Walking in the streets, you finally find a pants shop. Called “Fancy Pants”. Look like those horned guys can joke sometimes, hey?
You enter in the shop, take a pant randomly, and you left. Just in time to hear the seller saying:
“Dud, I hav vission cause Imma sure I saw an humen comin an taikin somtin.”
Yes, he's hallucinating. Obviously. There's only one human here, and he's in your pants.

After more minutes, more headaches, and a big crying about how hard a rock can be, you're facing Satori again. For some reason, she's hiding her face with both her hands. You don't know if it's what they call a “facepalm”, or if it's because you're half-naked in front of her. You knew you forgot to take some underwear with the pant.
Being ready again, you wait for Satori to remove her hands from her face. After one hour, you decide to ask her nicely if she can stop hiding her face.
“Are you presentable?”
Is what she said. Presentable? Well, you're not shaved, your hairs are sticky and disgusting, your skin is dark from all the dirt you walked in, your breath could kill a bear, and your teeth are white. And let's not talk about your nails, black and probably as dangerous as a bacteriological weapon.
“Okay, okay, I got it.”
You wonder if you should wait for her sister.
“She'll follow us by herself. Let's go before I change my mind.”
She's pretty optimistic. She doesn't think you would drag her along by the collar if she's not okay with your decisions.
“...”
Fine, then, let's go!!

To where? Where is the way out?
“I knew it. All right, let me try something. Orin, can you bring Yamame here? Bring Utsuho with you, please.”
Without answering, the cat fly away, followed by the raven. You're alone with Satori. All alone with a little girl. Goood.
“Why are you that interested in me?”
Besides the fact she's pretty? That's because she needs help. You've been alone for a while, and yet, helping people is still some kind of pavlovian reflex.
“You've met other human before, right? With not them?”
Mainly because they're weren't as pretty. And almost because they tried to kill you to steal your water, or your food. That's a pretty dangerous world here, Satori.
“And what about my sister?”
You don't really know. There's something telling you to follow her. Like a good little dog. Maybe she can help you? But how exactly? You don't know. And do you care? HA HA HA HA no.
“Fine. I give up. I'll follow you for a while, since you know the Surface better than me.”
You're pretty sure that ANYONE knows the surface better than her.
“Hell with that.”

After a while, the two pets came back with a giant spider. You don't remember anything after that. Some peoples hates snakes, other hates spiders. That was just no luck. You fainted like a pussy. But you just hate spiders.
When you're back to your sense, you're facing the sky. Your first reaction is to scream in joy, rip off your hat in happiness, kiss the ground, piss on the dirt, and keep screaming.
After you're calmed down, you notice that Satori is waiting quietly for you to be calmed down. That's very nice from her.
You wonder what she wants now.
“Well, you know where you're going, right?”
YES! Let's walk to this nice forest!
“... Nevermind.”
And the whole party begin walking, toward a new and bright future.

“Maybe you can explain me, but I though there was... more peoples like you living here?”
You wonder how long she was living underground.
“Something like... 300-400 years?”
Oh. Makes sense then.
“What do you mean?”
She doesn't knows that mankind disappeared almost entirely. You though she could read your mind and make it clear, but-
“HOLD ON!”
She grabs your arm. While you're really appreciating a girl's contact, the fact that she's squeezing your arm really hard worries you a little.
“What happened?”
You don't know. You weren't here. It happened a long time ago. 200 years ago to be accurate.
“But what happened back then?! ANSWER ME!”
Well, to be short, mankind disappeared. You don't really know how, according to some survivors, it was either Zalgo or Lavos. So you don't know for sure, because you're pretty sure that Lavos never existed to begin with. You're not really sure about Zalgo.
“Hold on. So what are you going to do?”
Well, other survivors talked about a haven somewhere in Japan, so you're kind of looking for it.
“... In short, you're alone, you don't know what you're doing, you don't have any plan, any food, anything. How did you managed to survive that long?”
Good question, girl. Unfortunately, you have a headache starting from now on, so you can't think anymore. Just walk, it'll disappear.
“... What am I got myself into?”
Says the girl. You call that adventure.

[] While walking, ask Satori several questions, about her, her sister, her pets, her sister, her parents, and also her sister.
[] Ask for her opinion about you in a cocky way.
[] Confess your sick attraction for little girls.

================

Basic proofreading. Too hot to proofread it for real. Picture is important. Pay attention to it. Meta-knowledge. Don't use it. But be careful.
>> No. 6869
[x] While walking, ask Satori several questions, about her, her sister, her pets, her sister, her parents, and also her sister.
>> No. 6870
[x] While walking, ask Satori several questions, about her, her sister, her pets, her sister, her parents, and also her sister.
Sure
>> No. 6871
[X] While walking, ask Satori several questions, about her, her sister, her pets, her sister, her parents, and also her sister.

>> mankind disappeared
>> Icon of Sin
>> Lunarians somewhere around Eintei besides the regular residents

The Lunarians opened a portal to DooM hell.

Fuck.
>> No. 6873
File 130620508787.jpg - (72.33KB, 207x225, 1299664351962.jpg) [iqdb]
6873
[x] While walking, ask Satori several questions, about her, her sister, her pets, her sister, her parents, and also her sister.

Walking, walking, walking.
Can be quite boring, isn't it? You should find a way to pass time.
What about talking with Satori?
“Hey Satori?”
“Yes. Even more than that.”
“Gniai?”
“Yes, I'm younger than you think.”
“Logical stuff is logical. And about your sister-”
“She's after us. Don't worry about her. She's more or less like that.”
“Do you know that Dulahan-”
“Yes, but you can't notice her, even if she's standing in front of you.”
“And then I saw that woman-”
“Yes, I had lots of pets. Most of them will be fine without me. I hope, at least. I really had to give up on everything I had.”
“Do you plan to be sad soon?”
“Sad? Why? Will it be useful?”
“Humans do that usually-”
“I'm not human.”
“Nonsense. You look like a girl. Therefore, you are a girl.”
“And I'm telling you I'm not human.”
“I encountered someone in Spain who said the same thing. I opened him up, and I watched closely. He was fully human.”
“You... opened him up?”
“Yes. Maybe I don't look like it, but I'm a doctor!”
“... Yeah, right.”
“True story. About your sister-”
“Don't even think about doing that to her. I won't let you.”
Now this leaves you speechless. 15 minutes ago, you wouldn't take that for a threat. But when she squeezed your arm, you noticed that she's stronger than she looks. You have to be careful. You don't understand it for now, but that girl is only looking human.
But you will never admit it. Since you started traveling, you avoided many horrible deaths from strange-looking creatures several times. If you learned that the one walking near you is that kind of creature, your sanity will probably go on a holiday, joining her friend Common Sense, on the island of I Don't Give A Fuck.

Of course, she's followed by a magical girl raven and a magical girl cat, but you can shrug it off by saying that the lack of oxygen gave you vapor for brain.
The fact that you're no longer underground won't let you use the same excuse again, so you can't witness any other strange event like this one.

But it's sure boring around here.
Hey, Satori.
“About my parents?”
Totally absolutely fully yes.
“I never knew them.”
Bad stuff does happen sometimes then.
“And yours?”
You supposed she could read minds! Why is she asking?
“To focus your attention on that, and also because it's polite to ask instead of just reading you.”
That's very nice from her. Of course, you're still very careful about pissing that little girl off, but at least you're assured that she's polite and stuff.
“And what about you?”
You don't remember. Of course, you had parents, but you don't remember them very well. Have you saw them, once in your life? You don't remember. Maybe yes. Maybe no.
Maybe they're thinking you're dead. Maybe they're happy. Maybe they're sad. Maybe they're dead too. Maybe they didn't even known you existed to begin with. The only people you respect was that blonde woman. After all, it's all thanks to her that you decided to become a doctor. Or is it your imagination? Your head is a total mess. No, wait, you had parents, right? And your father was disappointed in you because you weren't a doctor! But you ARE a doctor! So why the hell was he complaining? Was it because you were single? No, it was about something else. Was it related to your mother? Was it related to an Oedipal complex?
HEADACHE! STOP THINKING!

You are lost.
You mean, really lost. If it was correct, you should use the word “loster”. Or even “lostest”. You are utterly, completely, and perfectly lost.
Of course, walking around without paying attention was the perfect way to get lost.
Of course! It's all Satori's fault!
“WHAT?”
Because she asked you about your parents, you were lost in your head, and you lost the path! Oh, yeah, there aren't any path to begin with, but...
“Hey, HOLD ON, you're the one leading the way, if you don't know the way, say it instead of getting us lost!”
Don't try to avoid a blame, little girl! It's her fault, and yet she's blaming you! What a nerve!
You walk to her, with the displayed cunning plan to slap some sense in her, but the raven and the cat are in your way. When you try to push them off, they transform in their girls form again, displaying a threatening look in their face, the kind of “don't-you-fucking-touch-my-master”.
Of course, you can't appreciate the show, since you're too busy smashing your head against a tree, repeating “it's an hallucination, an hallucination, that can't be real, that can't be real”.
That's not very mature, but at least you don't have to explain how a raven can turn into a busty woman, with a bust large enough to kill a man.

After 25 smashes, an impressive blood loss, and a good crying about general insanity, you're ready again. But you're still lost.


[] Ask Satori to send one of her pet to scout.
[] Scream. Maybe someone will come to help you. Of course, it'll probably be hostile, and it'll be after your blood, since your face is kind of bloody right now.
[] Keep smashing your head against Mister Tree. That won't resolve anything, but at least, you won't have to look for a solution.

=========================

>>6871
Now that you say it, I want to write something like that, but there's already a Doom story here, so no. Too bad, you had a good idea.

Also, yeah, but this story is linked with my other stories so far. However, I won't tell you WHEN it happened, nor HOW this story is linked with the others. You'll have to figure that by yourself. Just like MC's insanity.
Pic is unrelated this time. I'll edit this post if I find a pic of a guy smashing his head against a tree while Satori is watching.
>> No. 6874
[X] Be random!

It's random, but not random enough. Maybe there'll be tits!
>> No. 6875
File 130620731579.jpg - (244.04KB, 500x657, guy.jpg) [iqdb]
6875
>>6874

Forgot my pic!
>> No. 6877
[X] >>6874
>> No. 6878
File 130622735180.jpg - (17.10KB, 335x230, img-9.jpg) [iqdb]
6878
Write-in isn't accurate enough. Please precise how random you want to be, or choose another vote.
>> No. 6879
[x] Scream. Maybe someone will come to help you. Of course, it'll probably be hostile, and it'll be after your blood, since your face is kind of bloody right now.
>> No. 6880
File 130625890379.gif - (9.84KB, 220x233, not a meme.gif) [iqdb]
6880
>>6878

Random!
>> No. 6881
[x] Ask Satori to send one of her pet to scout.
>> No. 6883
[x] offer your hat up to the hat gods. maybe they'll give you one of those cool looking hats. You know, the ones in movies.
>> No. 6884
[] Ask Satori to send one of her pet to scout.
>> No. 6885
>>6878

Random random. That's how random I want it.

Random.
>> No. 6887
2 votes for random stuff, 2 votes for sending a pet as a scout. If there's no more vote, I'll decide the winning vote by throwning a coin.

>>6883
You forgot that our good doctor ripped his hat into pieces when he left the underground.
>> No. 6891
>>6887 Yeah, I know. I was hoping he'd offer the scraps up so he can get a new one. You know, from the hat gods.
>> No. 6897
Update was deleted. Mainly because I don't like it. I will rewrite it, and fix several things.
>> No. 6899
Huh? You didn't like it? But they're always kind of bad, don't see what would've been so much worse with this one.
>> No. 6901
>>6899
Satori's reaction was out of character, and MC wasn't random enough.
>> No. 6906
File 130653439583.jpg - (97.10KB, 176x240, 12972093632.jpg) [iqdb]
6906
[x] Ask Satori to send one of her pet to scout.

You should use your basic military training. Of course, you're not really a soldier, but you did have a basic training.
“Satori?”
Watching you, she answers without letting you explain your idea.
“I see. Interesting. Rin, you were here before, right? Can you go check, and take Utsuho with you? This world seems dangerous.”
The hallucination-cat-girl answers:
“Are you sure you want to stay alone with him?”
“I'm not in danger myself. He's the one being in danger.”
You're really pissed off by the way she talks about you. It's like you're not here. Or rather like you're some kind of slug unable to talk. But you're not a slug! Okay, you drool a lot when you're sleeping, but that doesn't mean you're a slug! It just means you're enjoying your sleep!
Wait, what were you thinking before thinking about slugs and stuff? Ah, yeah! You were idling with Satori, waiting for her pets.

“So... Weather's fine, isn't it?”
“I don't know. I haven't been outside for more than 400 years.”
“Well, yeah.”
Dang. Don't speak about the landscape. Speak about something she might know.
“Do you what 'suck the head' means?”
“No.”
Congratulations, fool. Think again. She said something earlier who might help you.
“Your pet, the cat, was here before?”
“Yes. She used to come here, for business. Well, before I get kicked from my mansion.”
“She visited the overworld often, and yet you didn't know about that... mess?”
“She wasn't coming here for news.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
Hrrrm. You should try to say something, that silence is unbearable. And that sun is getting really hot, you should go under a tree, since you destroyed your hat, idiot.

Following you like a little dog, Satori still doesn't say anything. She's waiting for you to make the first move.
“What do you eat for dinner, usually?”
“Lady Satori!”
THAT FUCKING CAT! You finally found the guts to say something, and that cat cut you! Shit, crap, and POOP!
“Hello back Orin. What did you found?”
“The Shinto Shrine is still here, Lady Satori!”
“Shinto what?”
You ask, but everybody is ignoring you. You were the leader, and now you're the underling. You don't like this. You must regain your leader position, at all cost!!
“Yeah, Lady, the one where the miko was!”
“Oh, I see. Is it empty?”
“Don't know, sorry! There was a barrier all over the place, but it's all worn out, so I suppose there's nobody here!”
“All right, we'll go here then.”
“Wanna me to carry you, milady?”
“No need for that Orin. I can fly by myself.”
Haha, d-did she said “fly”? Yes, you think you heard her saying “fly”. Does that means she's going to fly? But that's impossible! Unless there's another force balancing gravity, it's impossible to fly! No, that's it! You just lost too many blood! That's why you're hearing things! Hahaha, that was just that, haha, silly you, you were scared for a while, just because this nice little girl was-
No longer here. Where is she? Did she disappeared? Or was she NEVER HERE to begin with?!
Your poor mind will collapse if you can't make sense of what's happening to you!
Oh, wait, she's just flying away. Silly you, you were almost panicked. Ha ha, silly you.
Hold on, did you said “flying”? Because I think you said “flying”!!
“LIFT MAKES THIS IMPOSSIBLE!”
You scream in panic. That doesn't help, but you feel a little better for screaming. Even like that, it's still not enough, and you're still a little panicked. You decide to have a little nervous breakdown before night falls.


After rolling on the floor, crying and tearing what's left of your hat apart, you're finally calmed down. Again. You should really make up a better excuse for the next time you're going to witness a strange event.
Anyway, you're calmed down, your composure is back too, so you decide to walk where Satori disappeared. After all, if there are other humans, it'll be good for your mental balance to speak to someone unable to fly or over non-logical stuff like that.

After a little walk through a dense forest (you wonder if you can call this a jungle), you reach some kind of path. You're not sure about the path thingy, since it looks totally abandoned. Still, you think that someone used it recently. Or else it wouldn't be here to begin with. Anyway, you decide to follow the path, hoping it will lead you either to a shelter, either to easy food.
Hey, what do you know, you find stairs! And a big red thingy on top of them! You think you saw one of those things in a tv show. You don't know how it's called, but you know it looks awesome.
Walking under it, you see a poor lame wood kind-of-house. The building looks really lame and awful. You see several holes on the roof, and the front is covered in moss. If someone lived here, cleaning and taking care of the building wasn't his first priority. But you think you can understand that, considering the actual situation.
Whatever, standing here like a moron won't change the actual situation, and statu quo isn't acceptable. So, move from where you are, and do something useful for once!

Wait, why are you putting those hat pieces into that wooden box? Are you trying to sacrifice it to gain something from some god? You don't even believe in god, you moron! Just stop that nonsense, and go in the building! What, you're scared? Nonsense. Move your ass and enter.
It's even worse when you're in. From the outside, you could see how old the building was. But now that you're in, you can enjoy the smell. Smells like “rotten old wood shelter N.5” for you. The building is strangely organized. You entered by the main door, placed behind the strange wooden box. Result is, you're now in a damp room. Roof are really important for a building. You never believed it before, but now you know. Raising your eyes, you see a big hole in the hole. And also several hanging things.

Okay. Calm down. Of course, those things look human, but maybe they're not. Maybe they're just decorations? Maybe they're not people hanged by their feet? Maybe it's just to scare you?
Your hands start shaking. You watch them coldly. There's fear in your body, who needs to get out, doesn't matter how. Luckily, your hands start shaking, allowing your head to stay cool. This is no time to panic or fool around. There are those things hanging, and you have to determine if they're living or not. The best idea is of course to poke them with a stick.
“...”
It's not answering, but it's moving. Is it sleeping? Something like that. You can't be sure. Bah, at least, it's living. You have a pretty good theory of who is there. And you also have a pretty good theory of what will happen if you don't find a way out. Of course, before they realize you poked their sleeping bodies with a wet broom.

Have you heard that? There's something behind you. NO, no, turn no back. Don't look behind you. Listen carefully. Can you hear it? It's like...

[] There's no noise at all!
[] “Tap, tap, tap”.
[] “THUMP. THUMP. THUMP.”

===========================================

Rewrote it. Still not perfect, but the day I can write something perfect, I will be able to die without regrets. Anyway, since there are differents options, think deeply before voting, since each option will bring a different character.
And don't expect Reimu. Seriously, don't.
>> No. 6907
[x] "Vroom! Vroom! Honk! Honk! Hey what the- BOOM!" Wait... you don't hear anything!
>> No. 6908
[x] “Tap, tap, tap”.
>> No. 6913
[x] There's no noise at all!
>> No. 6919
[] There's no noise at all!
>> No. 6921
[x] “Tap, tap, tap”.
>> No. 6925
So, yeah. There's two votes for the tappity thingy, and two votes for the silent thingy.

And one vote for... introducing a car youkai?
Well, what do you know, I guess I'll roll a dice.
>> No. 6926
[X] "Vroom! Vroom! Honk! Honk! Hey what the- BOOM!" Wait... you don't hear anything!
>> No. 6927
[X] "Vroom! Vroom! Honk! Honk! Hey what the- BOOM!" Wait... you don't hear anything!
>> No. 6928
>>6925
[X] "Vroom! Vroom! Honk! Honk! Hey what the- BOOM!" Wait... you don't hear anything!
-[X] If that doesnt work, or if it does, whip it out.
>> No. 6929
Vote called for the write-in.
Please wait warmly until it's ready.
>> No. 6930
>>6929
Think you forgot your trip.
>“If, one day, you're too drunk to figure if you're facing the sky or the ground, piss on yourself. Gravity will tell you what you're facing.”
This single line makes this the best story I've read on here by far, And you should feel great for it.
>> No. 6931
File 130705730075.jpg - (77.16KB, 289x315, Doc.jpg) [iqdb]
6931
[X] "Vroom! Vroom! Honk! Honk! Hey what the- BOOM!" Wait... you don't hear anything!

There's a loud noise. Like if someone who never drove in real life just tried. You're not sure how, but you know that there's an accident. Maybe people are wounded. You're a doctor, you should go help!
Or not. There's no other humans here. Which means that this accident was only including monsters that you're trying to avoid at all cost. You should act like you didn't hear anything. That's it! You're deaf!

“Don't go there, fool, there's a hole!”
“Tell me that sooner!”
More noise. Look like they went in the hole this time.
“Shit, it's burning!”
“Get away!”
BOOM. You're pretty sure that's what happen if your car is burning.

You. Don't. Hear. Anything. Even better, you're going to leave this place very soon! There are people monsters coming, and you don't want to be found!
But, damn, there's those guys hanging from the ceiling like ham! You should help them somehow! Sure, you don't know them, and you're pretty sure they never did anything to help you. But it doesn't matter! You're a hero! You can't be a cynical bastard!
Or can you? Can you be cynical while being a hero? You're pretty sure you can, but your brain fails at imagining the result. Your brain is just plain retarded, you should throw it away.
Using your whip, you try to pull the cocooned people back to the ground.

Of course, now that you've done it, you know that it was a stupid idea. Sure, you brought them down, but you broke the frame. Which means that the whole building is collapsing around you.
Nice job breaking it, jackass. Luckily enough, you're not hurt. You're not sure about the people you “rescued”. One of them is bleeding badly from a wound on her face. But not, you recognize them! It's Satori and her pets! The magical raven girl, and the magical cat girl. There's also two other girls you don't know, one with strange dog-looking ears, and the other being totally unknown to you. She's wearing a track suit, and you find that rather disturbing. She's obviously one of those cannibals monsters, and yet she looks totally defenseless.
Of course, being crushed by a collapsed building can ruin anyone's day. And everyone looks cute when sleeping. Except your ex-lover, she was always snoring. Or was it you? But her sister was even worse, she hated you and wanted you dead. Bitch can't take a joke.

Anyway, now you're in a dangerous situation. Sure, you're safe and stuff, but if any of those girls wakes up, the result will be rather annoying. Satori will probably beat you to death, the magical pets girls will maim you for hurting Satori, and any of the new girls may try to eat you. Your lifespan is running short.
But you're a HERO! From Spain, you walked all around Europe, Russia, China, and you built a strange ship to reach Japan! Sure, the ship was half-built when you found it, but you're not really a carpenter, so being able to restore it was a miracle! You are a hero, who went through hell to reach a haven! You're not getting so far just to be eaten! You are a hero, and your must act like a hero!
Run away. Now.

Is what you want to do, but something tells you to stay near Satori. According to her delirium speech about insanity, you're crazy. Well, even if you are crazy, she may be able to help you, so you decide to stay near her until she “fixes” you. Of course, that's crazy.
Hell, just the fact that you're staying here instead of running away is enough to prove that you're crazy. So, hey you should leave, but you can't abandon Satori here. So what should you do? Take her on your back, and leave? Why not, that's doesn't sound as stupid as your usual ideas.
You walk to Satori, untie her, and try to lift her body on her back. But you fail to find a comfortable position, and she's heavier than you though.
Putting her in a piggyback position, you're quickly distracted by the feeling of her chest on your back. You can't do this. If you try, you'll end up raping her after 50 meters. Find something else.
“Oh my, I drank too much.”
Crap, the girl in track suit is waking up! And the doggy-eared girl too! Quick! Do something!

You drop dead on the ground, and feign death.
“Hey, Kyouko, look! There are people here!”
“I don't care! Nazrin asked us to investigate the shrine, and thanks to your amazing driving skills, we're investigating a pile of dust!”
“Hey, it's not my fault! If roads were properly maintained-”
“If, if, if! With “if”, we could put Gensokyo in a bottle, so stop that!”
“Okay, okay. But I keep saying it's not my fault that the shrine collapsed!”
“Yeah, right. We enter in dah shrine, dah shrine collapses. I don't think it's a coincidence.”
“Those peoples here are responsible for the collapsing!”
“You're trying to blame someone else for your own mistake? You're the worst!”
“Hey, at least I don't spend all my time holding a broom!”
“At least I can travel without any risk!”
Okay, they are arguing. It's time for you to sneak away.
“Stop right there, you!”
Crap, they saw you.

You jump on your feet, dropping Satori. The girls are shocked. Obviously it's your hero aura! Or maybe it's because you were holding a motionless girl, while being in a strange position!
“A human! Kyouko, that's a human!”
“Yeah, thanks, I can see that! Now let me talk with him!”
Displaying a smiling face, the dog-eared girl try to communicate with you!
“Hello. My name is Kyouko Kasodani. I'm a Yamabiko. What is your name, mister?”
She's doing a good job at talking. BUT THAT'S OBVIOUSLY A DISTRACTION! While you'll talk with her, the other girl -the one in track suit- will try to attack you from behind! You can't let that happen!
Not answering, you begin to slowly move backward, avoiding the “Kyouko”. She's not surprised by your reaction, and she keeps talking.
“I'm not hostile towards you, you know? Perhaps you could tell me your name. Maybe I can help you? Are you hungry? Do you need a shelter?”
Don't answer the cannibal little girl! The last one you ran away from was a night sparrow, and that was close! Run away as fast as you can, but don't show her your back!
“Perhaps my master can help you, she's very powerful, you know. She's the one who said that she should take human for dinner.”
Take human for dinner? FUCK! Okay. No more thinking, but more acting!

You grab Satori's leg, throw her on your back, and run away quickly. Well, at least you try. But the girl in track suit appears before you, and try to push you, back to Kyouko.
Without any reflexion, you drop Satori on the ground again, and you decide to get rid of that girl.
First, with your hands, you slap both her ears. Result is temporary deafness, and disorientation. Second, while she protect her face with her arms, you punch her in the stomach. It works quite well, and it's stuns her. Third, you grab her by the collar, and you throw her on the ground, out of your way. Conclusion: temporary deafness, disorientation, light suffocation due to the punch. She won't bother you for 15 minutes. There's a chance she might become deaf for real, or that she dies. That asides, there's nothing serious.
Now that your opponent is defeated, you take Satori, and carry her over your shoulder. The fight against that girl filled you with adrenaline, erasing any pain, and multiplying your strength. You know it won't last long, and you have to be far away when the adrenaline fades.
Of course, that's counting without the Kyouko girl, who's now … flying after you. Yeah, right, she's flying. Screw that, it's obviously another hallucination.
Something hits your head. Something hard, like a stick, or... yes, a broom. She hit you with a broom.
Okay, it's beating time girl.

You are facing KYOUKO KASODANI.
Level: 1.
Species: Cannibal monster.
Note: You're stronger than her. Just beat her until she's down.

[] Beat her with a wooden plank.
[] Just punch her in the face.
[] Use your intelligence to get rid of her!
[] Use an object:
-[] Hat remains.
-[] Whip.
-[] Unconscious Satori.

===============================
There's a reference to a movie. I gives you a cookie if you can find it.
>> No. 6932
[x]Whip it out.
-[x]"Trust me, eye'm a doctor."
>> No. 6933
File 130706349110.jpg - (58.62KB, 465x619, are you a wizard.jpg) [iqdb]
6933
>>6930

Wait, wait wait, you think this story is good good? Like, you read it not because it's so bad it's good, but because it's a quality work? And not in the sense that it's a QUALITY work, but in the sense that it's well written?

I just lost a bet, you bizarre son of a low-standard writer.

Oh, and I'll vote:

[X] Do the Thriller. IT'S THE THRILLER! THRILLER NIGHT!
>> No. 6934
Ha! That was my write in, and it turned out some amusing results. Glad my insanity is working for me in this story.

[x]Whip it out.
-[x]"Trust me, eye'm a doctor."
>> No. 6935
>>6932
Write-in rejected.
I don't like the "eye'm" part. Please prepare another vote or follow one already available.
>> No. 6936
>>6935

Thank you for that little victory against dumb memes.

[x] Hat remains
>> No. 6937
[x] Use an object:
-[x] Unconscious Satori.

We shall bludgeon her to submission with Satori.
>> No. 6938
Hi, >>6932 here to say:
[x]Whip it out.
-[x]"Trust me, I'm a doctor."
>> No. 6939
[x] Use an object:
-[x] Unconscious Satori.
Equip Satori! Whack some youkai!
>> No. 6940
>Use your intelligence to get rid of her!
Oh yeah, that will go well.

[x] Use an object:
-[x] Whip.
>> No. 6941
Vote called. Next update when I'll feel like writing soon.
Prepare for hitting a poor janitor youkai with a mind reader youkai.
>> No. 6942
>>6941
Can we also whip it out, Because we're a doctor?
>> No. 6944
>>6941

Hooray!
>> No. 6945
>>6942
There's a girl wanting to beat the crap out of you with a broom because you beat the breath out of her friend, and you want to show your dick to her?
WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?
>> No. 6946
>>6945
Nothing of course! After all, We're a doctor. Doctor's dont get hurt, silly, They fix people who ARE hurt. If they got hurt, Who would save people?
Silly writer.
>> No. 6947
File 130731047729.jpg - (157.14KB, 1366x768, mario_kart_2011_v50002.jpg) [iqdb]
6947
>>6946
I am a doktor! Trust me! Unfortunately, I can't heal myself, but I am pretty gut at healing other peoples!

Update almost here. Rewriting some part, and proofreading, and it's over.
>> No. 6948
File 13073126449.jpg - (625.81KB, 771x885, Meanwhile underground.jpg) [iqdb]
6948
[x] Use an object:
-[x] Unconscious Satori.

“Okay, if you want to play like this!”
You grab Satori by her foot, and you face the Kyouko girl. She's adopting a defensive posture now, holding her broom like a spear.
Bare-handed, you have to get rid of that broom to hit directly. You can break it, or take it from her hands, in many ways. But first, you have to test its solidity.
Using the lifeless Satori as a mace, you attack Kyouko, aiming for the head. She parries quite easily, hitting Satori with the handle, and counter attacking by poking you in the chest. You answer by throwing Satori. This time, Kyouko ducks, avoiding the youkai. Quickly, while she's focused on Satori, you grab her broom, and try to take it off her hands.
Unfortunately, she's stronger than expected. You try to weaken her grasp by hitting her in the face with your elbow.
“Ow!”
She's half-stunned, but still not letting it go. Worse than that, she kicks you in the groin. You let go the broom, opening your body for an attack.
The first hit is on your face. Still with the wooden handle. For a second, you can't see anything but stars, and you can't say where you are. Are you laying, or are you standing? The second hit is on your back, throwing you on the ground.

Stunned, you try to get on your feet one more time, but the girl kicks you in the shoulder, throwing you one more time on the ground. Rubbing your face, you try to focus on the current situation.
And, with a flash, a solution comes to you!
Kyouko is standing in front of you, completely still. If you try to stand, she'll kick you in the dust one more time. But she's too nice to kick you while you're still on the floor, so you'll use this chance.

First, you will punch her knee. Depending of her resistance, you might break it. Second, she will probably crouch by reflex to protect her legs. This time, an uppercut well-placed might knock her off. There's a chance she might bite her tongue, you'll have to take that into consideration. Third, if she's still not down, you will hit her in the face several times, using your elbows. However, you will be dangerously close, and you will be exposed to a counter-attack, so you have to stun her before. After the combo, take the broom from her hands, and use it to knock her off. Usually, there's a probability her skull might be broken if you attack her too hard, but if she's not knocked yet, the said-probability will be low.
Okay, let's do this.
Jumping on your feet, but still crouching, you grab Kyouko's knee with your left hand, and punch it with your right hand. You do it wrong, however, and the knee isn't broken. It'll leave a bad bruise. Screaming in pain, Kyouko try to shove you away with the broom. Just as planned.
The uppercut. Clenching your left hand, you raise it. That's a failure. You forgot to aim, and you only manage to punch the air. Staggering away, Kyouko seems to understand who she's facing. She's on her guard now. Okay, fine. It's right, it's right, next!
You begin your combo on Kyouko. Right elbow, cheek, left elbow, temple, right punch, jaw. Showing you her back in a attempt to protect herself, you can hear Kyouko spitting something. Her jaw must be damaged, she's bleeding. NO! DON'T THINK! ACT!
Grabbing her by the waist, you turn on yourself, and throw her away. She lands quite badly, judging by her pained scream.
She's now laying on her back, but she's not knocked out yet. Time to finish her. You grab something, and walk to her. Then, you begin to beat her with that soft thing you found. She parries quite well, still using her broom. Hell, you don't know what that broom is made of, but it's not your usual fragile wood!

Wait a minute, what are you doing?! You're trying to beat a girl to death? Stop that, RIGHT NOW!
You're transfixed. You can't move anymore. The horror of your action is hitting you quite badly. Think about it. In short, you just ruined a shrine, attacked two girls without any proof, punching one in the stomach and elbowing another in the face. Right now, you're beating her while she can't even defend herself efficiently!
Hold on, what are you using to beat her? Oh, right, Satori. In short, you used the girl you want to make a friend of to beat another girl who tried to greet you nicely.
Nice job, jackass. Really. Maybe you should excuse to-
PLAF!
You ears are ringing. Pain is going havoc in your head. Protecting your face by reflex, you drop Satori on the ground. Another hit. On the back. You're thrown on the ground for the third time, your ears still ringing.
“Dang...”
Something sharp presses against your back. Not a knife, maybe a sword? You're not sure, and you can't really focus. You're desperately trying to protect your ears, that ringing is really painful. Slowly, you lost your sense, one after one, and you stay in darkness, unable to say where you are, when you are, or even how you are.


The first sense coming back is Mr Sense of Smell. Smells like... cut grass.
Second sense coming back is Mr Touch. You're in a fetal position. Hey! Mr Headache! He's... GOOONE! You are so happy you could totally ride a pig toward oblivion and flames! Well, you would be happy if you knew where you are.
Third sense coming back is Mr Eyesight. And he's telling you that you're in a flower field, with a red sky above you, and a black sun visible near the horizon.
Fourth sense coming back is Mr Hearing. And he's telling you that someone is behind you.

You jump on your feet, trying to identify the person.
No, you don't know her. Brown hair, black tie, white shirt, and a nice brown dress. You totally don't know her. But your instinct is telling you that she's human. You decide to act in a mature way.
“Hello, Lady. What time is it?”
Nice job being original, asshat! Hold on, you no longer have a hat. Nice job, asshole.
Without answering you, the girl take a cigarettes pack from her pocket, and hold it out for you. You shake your head negatively. She shrugs, and light one.
After a while breathing on the tobacco thingy, she finally speaks.
“First, my apologies for bringing you here, doctor. But the one I hired to bring you is not really competent when he have to works on human.”
FINALLY! Ever since you started traveling, you encountered several creatures, some human, other... less human, and, this girl, is the only one calling you “doctor”! You are so happy someone acknowledge your biology PhD! Trying to hide your smile and your happiness, you answer with what seems to be a cool tone.
“No, it's okay. After all, the more important thing is that I'm here, isn't it?”
Wow. Not only you sounds like a retard, but you're also using sentences from old Hollywood movies! Your lack of imagination will make you look like a complete moron, you know?
Smiling to herself, the girl ignore the question, and quickly jump to the main topic.
“Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Renko Usami, and I have a job for you.”

[] “Go on. Hold on, I must check before if I still have my equipment. Whip can be sold for several pounds, you know?”
[] “Go on. Hold on, I must pick my nose first.”
[] “Go on. Are you free for dinner, after work?”
[] “Go on. Are you read Sutter Kane?”
[] (Write-in. Ask any questions, except what kind of panties she's wearing)

==============================

Proofread it myself. Pic may be relevant. Don't vote for mèmes, I will ignore them. There's nothing wrong with being crazy, but being TOO crazy may lead you to a dead end. Or even worse.
>> No. 6949
[x] “Go on. Hold on, I must check before if I still have my equipment. Whip can be sold for several pounds, you know?”
[x] “Go on. Hold on, I must pick my nose first.”
[x] “Go on. Are you free for dinner, after work?”
[x] Whip it out
-[x] "Don't worry, I'm a do- oh wait you knew that."
--[x] Whip it in.
>> No. 6956
[x] “Go on. Are you read Sutter Kane?”
Simply because I have no idea what this is supposed to mean. We get to meet Yamame soon?
>> No. 6957
[x] “Go on. Wait, hold on, I must check before if I still have my equipment. Whip can be sold for several pounds, you know?”
>> No. 6962
[x] Kiss her. Make a good first impression.
>> No. 6964
>>6962
I love this vote! No, seriously!
If I could, I would accept it glady!
>> No. 6965
>>6964
Hi, Whip it out anon here, Changing my vote to
[x]Kiss her. Make a good first impression.
>> No. 6969
[x] Kiss her. Make a good first impression.

This should be interesting
>> No. 6970
File 130748636859.jpg - (171.52KB, 740x800, Renko.jpg) [iqdb]
6970
[x] Kiss her. Make a good first impression.

She's offering you a job? Sweet! Exactly what you needed! You mean, it's not like you're the only human left on the planet! No, you're really grateful! Besides, she's quite pretty! You should make a good first impression! Kiss her!

“Are you all right?”
“Mmmm mmmm mm!”
You forgot she was smoking. And you tried to kiss her while her lips were still holding that damn cigarette. You burned your mouth quite badly. It's quite excruciating. But thanks to your quite special training “Sis' cakes”, you learned to suffer quite silently.
It was a very useful skill, now that you think about it. Almost as useful as learning the word “quite”.
“Doctor, answer me. Are you interested in- ah?”
She lets go a little charming cry when you take the cigarette from her mouth, before kissing her. You're not really an experienced kisser, but you know the theory. Maybe she's liking it, since she's not slapping you. Or maybe it's because you're hugging her so tightly she can't move.
You were right. She's a very sweet girl. Too bad she's smoking, you can feel that smell from her mouth. She'll probably die very soon, 5-10 years at least. Cancer is really interesting, it's like a uncontrolled mutation who-
Stop. Don't think about that, doctor. Enjoy this very moment while you can. You showed restraint during all this time, even after that, when you met that little mind reading girl, and it drove you half-crazy. Now you finally have a girl to yourself, and you know it won't go any further. So enjoy this kiss while you can, because insanity will come back once this is over.
Hold her. Feel her breast against your chest. Love her, even if it's just for a little moment, doctor.

Finally, after a long minute, she shoves you back, and tries to catch her breath.
“WHY DID YOU-”
“Sorry, it wasn't good?”
You ask, using your famous skill: “puppy's stare”. Feared it was in the orphanage, for it was able to redeem your pathetic little self from every crime, including putting ice in the director's bed. No, wait, you never lived on an orphanage. Or did you? You don't remember. And you don't really care too.
“THAT'S NOT THE QUESTION!”
Awww, how cute, she's blushing like a school girl.
“So, about that job? Are you going to tell me or are you going to keep on with that kiss?”
“Ah! Yes!”
A little perturbed, she scratches her head, trying to remember what she was supposed to said. Watching her face makes you smile. Before, that girl was not really smiling, mostly wearing some “business face”, like a mask. And now, you no longer have a business girl in front of you, but a confused girl. That's refreshing to see that. For a while, you feel good. It's like nothing really changed. You're still a sadist teacher asking difficult questions to see how his student will answer.
“Doctor!”
“That's not you! I saw him in a mirror a month ago. He's tall, black hair, badly shaved, looks disgusting.”
“No, I mean... You!”
“You what? You tube? Yeah, I miss that.”
“NO! You! The doctor!”
“Me? The doctor? I can't, I don't have a Tardis!”
“Will you shut your mouth and listen to me?”
“Walking alone in the badlands can get pretty unnerving too. Did you know Robinson Crusoé talked to everything on his island, including rocks and animals?”
“Doctor, please listen to me.”
“I'm listening you.”
Peoples those days aren't polite at all. That's why I'm so polite. To annoy the fuck out of them.
“I have a job for you.”
“I heard that before. What's the deal?”
“We have a doctor in Gensokyo, but she's incompetent.”
“Tell me more, please?”
“In short, she's more like a apothecary than a doctor, you see? She can only create medicines, she's incompetent in surgery and anything like that.”
“I see. And you want me to teach her?”
“Yes.”
“It'll be difficult.”
“Excuse me?”
“You see, I'm a doctor all right. But that's mostly honorific. To be accurate, I'm a biologist. I'm not the best in the domain of healing.”
“Perhaps. But you're the best of what's left.”
For some reason, you feel insulted.
“What will I gain from this?”
“First, a shelter. Second, you'll be able to meet other humans.”
“Deal.”
“That was fast.”
“It's been a while since the last time I saw something else than a cannibal monster.”
“All right. You'll be dropped in front of the mansion.”
“What's the doctor's name?”
“Her name is Reisen Inaba.”
“I don't know who taught her, but he must be a complete retard. Kinda like 'hey let's teach you how to make medicine but guess who takes what', isn't it?”
“Just... don't speak about her master like that when she's near.”
“Nobody will tell me what to say. Last girl who tried almost lost an arm in the process.”
“Yes, I know about that.”
“Anything left to know?”
“Well... You're quite free to move as you want, but I suggest avoiding the underground, and the shrine you ruined before.”
“Why?”
“People are quite pissed after you.”
“Suck to be them.”
“And the doctor you have to train?”
“Yeah?”
“She's a moon rabbit.”
“WHAT-”

Too late. The whole landscape, including the black sun, is already no more. Look like you failed one more time. Too bad you couldn't kiss that girl one more time, she was really tasty.
>> No. 6971
Poor guy.
160posts omitted. First 100 shown.
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