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183243 No. 183243
I will write a story about Christmas with one Touhou each day until Christmas.
Choose your first Touhou.

No. 183245
[X] Rengeteki
No. 183246
[x] Kogasa
No. 183247
You make your way over to Mugenkan to meet Rengeteki. As you are poor and weak, your only option was to swim through the Lake of Blood to get there.

As you open the door to the mansion, a few fairies see your bloody visage, and promptly scream and scramble away, flinging danmaku all over the place. Not letting this get you down, you press on, and accost several fairies who attempt to run away, faint, or tell you that nobody in the mansion has such a stupid name.

Eventually you are struck by fairy danmaku and your search ends with that.

You have wasted the entire day, much like Rengeteki is a waste of a wiki entry.
No. 183248
[x] Kotohime
No. 183254
[x] Kana

>>Rengeteki is a waste of a wiki entry
Luminous, are you going to let this slide
No. 183255
>>183247

Excuse me sir, I just so happened to be passing by this thread when I noticed you talking shit about my Waifu. Please note that any further slandering of my perfect goddess Rengeteki will result in us engaging in a gentlemanly bout of no-holds-barred fisticuffs.
No. 183259
>>183255
ur waifu is a fukin nerd
No. 183264
[x] Rin Satsuki
No. 183266
[x] Rin Satsuki

Can't not vote for this...
No. 183273
In the interest of fairness I'll go with the first choice after each story.

[X] Kotohime

You head over to Kotohime's place to pick her up. Despite having no information about where she lives, you miraculously manage to find her home and knock on her door. Kotohime enthusiastically greets you and pulls you by the arm into her home before you get a chance to object, so she can show you the latest addition to her collection of side tables.

Sensing your disinterest in her super boring collection she quiets down, but being the generous Christmas-y sort of guy you are, you take the opportunity to reveal the present you got her; a brand new side table. Kotohime inspects it for a few moments before telling you that it's a crime to present her with such a low quality side table, and promptly arrests you for your poor taste.

You spend the rest of the day locked up in Kotohime's basement, much like PC-98fags lock on to any opportunity to have their characters featured.
No. 183274
>>183273
[x] Five Magic Stones
No. 183280
>>183274

I can't wait to see how he does this one. Mai husbando finally sees some love!
No. 183283
>>183280

>finally sees some love

Five magic stones has more porn written about them than Rengeteki does on this site. Just sayin.
No. 183285
>>183283
That you, Rabbit?
No. 183300
>>183285
nope, I wrote my 5MS shit
No. 183306
[X] Five Magic Stones

Following your complete lack of success with real women, you take a large leap in the other direction, and decide to spend the day with a few rocks you saw once. Using your mysterious protagonist powers to make your way through the dream world, you eventually come across the five magic stones, which flash a dazzling display of colours as you approach.

Unfortunately, you failed to recognise that this was well-documented magical stone code for "get yo ass out of our turf nigga", and they promptly popped a heap of danmaku in your poor little white ass.

You have made a poor display of understanding, much like certain voters have a questionable understanding of what constitutes a Touhou.
No. 183307
[x] Gengetsu
No. 183324
[X] Letty
No. 183351
[X] Gengetsu

Travelling to the other, less popular dream world, you find Gengetsu's house and are greeted by Mugetsu, who brings you in to wait for her sister to come back home while preparing tea for you. The two of you discuss Gengetsu, and you're prodded to reveal what you think her good points are. You dodge the question since you can't think of any.

Gengetsu arrives home and Mugetsu makes a show of leaving the two of you alone, and you go on to share gifts with each other and discuss the future. As it becomes about time to turn in, Gengetsu takes a sudden dominant attitude and pushes you into her bed, claiming that she can no longer hold back how she feels about you. You reciprocate her feelings and begin getting intimate with her.

You then wake up. It was just a dream, after all, much like Gengetsufags dream of acknowledgement.
No. 183357
[X] Satsuki Rin
No. 183367
>>183357
>inb4 "much like people long for that which doesn't exist" or some shit like that
No. 183371
Tenshi, because she's a real 2hu
No. 183373
[x] Yoshika.

This is halloween, right?
No. 183374
[X] Satsuki Rin

There was going to be a story about Rin here, but it was cut due to time constraints.
No. 183375
[X] The Giant Catfish
No. 183376
[X] Shinki
No. 183379
[x] Kedama
No. 183383
>>183374
[x]Author's favorite touhou

Either you have to write a proper story, are forced to insult your favorite touhou, get out of it in an amusing manner, or fail your self-imposed challenge. Whichever way I win.
No. 183384
>>183383

Unless writing a proper story was his intention all along, and you played right into his keikaku. In which case, he wins.
No. 183386
>>183384
don't you mean

in which case, DOORI
No. 183414
[X] The Giant Catfish

You spent most of your day trying to catch the catfish, but you suck at fishing and only caught blowfish and the occasional hungry fairy.

You have a nagging feeling that you are going about this process in the wrong way, but pay it no heed.
No. 183415
[x]Author's favorite touhou
No. 183416
[x] Cirno.
In case the 'author's favorite Touhou' gets vetoed as 'not specific'.
No. 183424
>>183367
>in b4 the next post follows the same pattern as the last two.

Man, you're so clever.

[x] Remilia
No. 183438
[X] Parsee
No. 183440
>>183416
Joke's on you.

[X]Author's favourite touhou

Some men might take issue with having a romantic interest in the mentally deficient, but those men don't understand moe. Cirno may be an idiot, but she's your idiot. And so you've taken her out to celebrate Christmas together.

You take Cirno into the human village and explore the stalls and attractions. Cirno repeatedly asks you about what things are you, and you enjoy feeling smart while explaining to her. You less enjoy needing to pay for all the things she breaks or eats without asking. Unfortunately the final straw occurs when she knocks over some stall's vase, and you've run out of money. You have no choice but to hawk the present you were planning to give Cirno at the end of the night.

Utterly defeated, you decide to take her somewhere more secluded, so you don't risk being sold into slavery. Cirno reaches into her pockets and happily presents you with a frosty little bracelet, which she proudly announces that she made herself. She then looks expectant, which makes it hard when you admit to her that you don't have anything to give her anymore. She looks upset, but then takes your arm and leans by your side.

"It's okay. Since you're my human, just being with you tonight is all I need."

You comment that you wish you could stay like that forever. Cirno seems to think of something, and tells you that you can. Before you can figure out what she means, she eagerly freezes you solid, to preserve this moment.

Unfortunately she still never got the hang of the unfreezing part. You die painlessly as the ice shatters, much like Cirno's heart.
No. 183441
[x] Mima
No. 183447
>>183440
I knew your taste in touhou would be as shit as your taste in anime
No. 183448
Lol. We have an edge master here.
No. 183453
[d] Mima

My mind says no but mah bones... My bones says yes.
No. 183459
>>183448
Get the fuck out of here.

[X] Mima

It took a lot of guts to ask Mima out, but you did it. And amazingly, she accepted. You were ecstatic. You agreed on a time and place to meet up, you put on your best clothes, and you got there half an hour early, like a true gentleman.

An hour later, Mima still hasn't arrived. But that's okay. Something must have held her up. She'll definitely get here soon; you can feel it in your bones.

Unfortunately, Mima doesn't show up, and you never see her again; a feeling all too familiar for Mimafags.
No. 183460
[x] Alice
No. 183461
[X] Meiling
No. 183462
[x]Games for Sony consoles
No. 183463
>>183460
Oh, this can only end well.
No. 183476
[X] Alice

Alice was very happy when you invited her out to spend the day together. So happy, in fact, that she decided you should be together forever, and you're currently tied to a chair while Alice prepares tea. You struggle to free yourself, but with little luck. That is, until one of Alice's dolls floats by, and you give it a knock.

This knock causes the doll to shift away from you, yanking Alice's arm, causing her to drop her tea cup. This cup lands on Alice's foot, causing her to jump backwards, and trip over her sofa. The impact knocks over a nearby side table, holding a partially-knit scarf that Alice was working on. For you. The scarf lands on Alice's face, and as she struggles to right herself, another of her dolls haphazardly knocks over a vase on top of her bookshelf, causing it to crash down her head and knock her unconscious.

You manage to free yourself over the following hours and decide to quickly exit. To make sure she doesn't come looking for you, you leave a note.

"Rumia woz heer
that human woz tastee"

You leave bite marks on the note for authenticity, and return home after emptying Alice's pockets.
No. 183477
[x] Satori
No. 183483
[x] Tenshi
No. 183493
[x] Rumia

Too obvious maybe, but the author deserves a free update
No. 183500
[X] Satori

Asking the mind-reading Satori out for Christmas is a nerve-racking experience, primarily because of all the inappropriate thoughts you may have at any moment, like how nice Satori would look in a swimsuit. As Satori stares you down, you take a moment to utter a quick prayer. I'm just a soul whose intentions are good, oh lord, please don't let me be misunderstood.
After a long but light-hearted sigh, Satori raises her arms and accepts your proposal.

The two of you have a nice night out together, looking through the various stands set up in the city. Since it's such a joyous festival, the normally wary oni pay no mind to Satori, and the two of you enjoy your peace as you try out snacks and play games together. At the end of the night the two of you sit down on a hill to watch fireworks together.

As you quietly sit next to each other, you wonder why it is that Satori decided to come with you tonight. Satori overhears this thought of yours, and tells you that since you loved animals, she knew you couldn't be a bad person. Sensing your confusion, she reminds you that your little prayer was a line from a song by The Animals. You correct her and tell her that it was actually a song by Nina Simone, and the ensuing argument causes her to dump you for being a pedantic prick.

Satori storms off by herself, and you spend the rest of the night drowning your sorrows in a nearby pub, much like self-pitying writefags.
No. 183501
[x] Kana
No. 183526
[X] Kana

Based on your many recent failures with real women, you decide to got for a less material approach and pursue the otherworldly phantom: Kana Anaberal. You are completely unable to find her however, and give up and go to bed.

Some time later, you are woken up by pots and pans crashing together over your head. It seems your desire to find Kana somehow reached her ears, and she has now decided to haunt you, apparently determined to be as much of a nuisance as possible.

Starting that day, Kana begins following you around, knocking over your books, spilling your drinks, burning your food, and pulling out chairs in front of you so you stub your toe on them.

You are quickly regretting invoking this person.

>YOU HAVE MET WITH A TERRIBLE FATE.
No. 183527
What the fuck is a nina simone?

[X] shota rinnosuke
No. 183529
[x] Kasen
No. 183532
[x] Byakuren
No. 183535
>>183527
Go back to the wikia, you belong there.
No. 183541
[x] Byakuren

Youkai jesus halp
No. 183545
Shot Rinnosuke could not be found. Please check the number, and try again.


[X] Kasen

You decide to track down the wild horny hermit (or something like that) and ask her out, hoping this will go a bit easier for you. She gratefully accepts, and immediately proposes a restaurant with a special all you can eat buffet going on.

Kasen quickly shows that there's a limit to "all you can eat", and after storing several days worth of food in her hobo belly, the angry restaurant manager has some whiny waiter kick you out. Kasen is still grateful for the meal however, and suggests the two of you spend the rest of the night at home.

Before long, the two of you are racing to the bedroom, before a chair suddenly slips out, tripping Kasen and sending her face-first into a wall, breaking her nose, and more importantly, leaving a nasty dent in your house. The mood is spoiled, and Kasen leaves back to the mountains to heal.

Kana celebrates this successful act of meddling by playing a merry game of "throw rice all over the fucking floor".
No. 183546
[X] Satori
No. 183547
[x] Reimu
No. 183550
Fuck touhoes we need the fucking ghostbusters. Or an exorcist

[x] Orin

If her expertise fails we could count on the shinigami or the Yama
No. 183552
>>183550
To which I say: Reimu might be able to help, if things don't go sour.
In other words, we be fucked.
No. 183553
We already did Satori are you blind

[X] Reimu

Opting to nip this ghost problem in the bud, you climb up the long path to the shrine maiden's home. Hell, with any luck you might be able to get a date out of this too.

After some negotiation you got Reimu to agree to deal with your problem, mostly because she fucking hates ghosts. When the two of you arrive at your home, Kana immediately senses the threat and begins flinging your belongings at Reimu, who responds by blasting magic back at her. Before long, Kana is defeated and ruthlessly exterminated, and your house is a complete wreck.

Reimu then tells you she wants extra payment for how much trouble this was, and you realise you're about to be in debt. You may have chosen the wrong person for this job.

>YOU ARE NOW A BROKE-ASS NIGGA.

Before Reimu goes, you ask her if she'd like to meet up again some time. Reimu quickly tells you that she wouldn't date a someone so poor, and breaks your finger for good measure.
No. 183554
[X] Rumia
No. 183556
>>183554
You know, given how this has all played out, that's a rather poetic choice.

[x] Rumia.
No. 183573
>>183554
Uh is there any point to vote if only the first vote wins?
No. 183589
[X] Rumia

You head into the forest to search for Rumia; the youkai of biting shit, but in a surprising twist ending, you are eaten by a grue.
No. 183590
[X] Shinki
We will get laid, even if it takes us to the depths of hell
No. 183607
[X] Shinki

You head on down to the recently established Makai Tourism Agency, in order to see about getting a trip over there. Since you are now a broke-ass nigga, you can't afford any of the available plans, and have to suck a few dicks for passage.

While travelling through Makai you are aggressively greeted by Yumemi, who apparently has deemed you an intruder. You try to explain to her that you want to meet Shinki, but she seems rather unimpressed by the smell of dicks on your breath and threatens to eject you from the premises if you do not immediately leave.

You offer to suck her dick in return for arranging a meeting, and find yourself unconscious and back in Gensokyo in short order.
No. 183608
[x] Luize
No. 183610
>much like Rengeteki is a waste of a wiki entry.

my fucking sides
No. 183623
>>183607
What, did she thought we were gonna replace her or something?

[x]LILY WHITE
She IS the spring.
No. 183655
[X] Ruizu

Fine, if you can't get in touch with Makai's leader, you'll take someone else. You suck a few more dicks and get back to Makai, and run into the Gensokyoboo Louise. You ask her if she wants to spend time together and while she initially refuses, she quickly warms up to you as you talk about Gensokyo and how you're from there.

The two of you enjoy a nice, relaxing trip together, until it's time for you to leave Makai. Louise insists that she come with you, because she has come to love you too much to stay apart. You feel like you may be rushing into things, but happily agree, and you help her get past border security by telling the guards that she's your waifu.

Once into Gensokyo however, Louise quickly ditches you, noting that she just used you to get into the country and would never bother with a loser like you otherwise, much like your Japanese ex girlfriend.
No. 183656
[X]Letty
No. 183663
[X] Letty

Traveller's log: Day X, time X
I've been hiking now for several days. I'm determined to seek out the winter youkai: Letty Whiterock. I'm sure she's somewhere in these mountains, but the snow is making for poor visibility, and it's difficult to get around while watching out for wolves and other youkai. Progress has been slower than anticipated, but I still have plenty of supplies left.

Traveller's log: Day X, time X
It's been a few days since my last entry. I've injured myself. Let my mind wander for a moment and lost my footing. Fell down the side of a cliff and gashed my leg on the way down. Stupid. Supplies are about halfway exhausted. I'll press on.

Traveller's log: Day X, time unknown
Fairies raided my bag while was sleeping. Lost about half my remaining supplies, as well as my compass and watch. Don't know what time it is outside of day and night. Don't have enough supplies to get back. No choice but to keep searching.

Traveller's logg
too tired to write much. no food left. most likely my last entry. i'll keep looking. i think i finally see her. i'll go to her now.



Some time later, Letty is going for a morning stroll when she comes across a dead, naked, frozen man who seems to have his dick wedged in a poorly constructed snowman. She decides to leave and pretend she didn't see anything, much like that time your mother caught you masturbating.
No. 183664
[x] Ellen
No. 183675
[X] Ellen

Not yet tired of boring PC-98 characters, you drop by Mystia's place for some lamprey as you think of who to plague next. While there you see some palette swap of Marisa, but she's so bland you don't pay much attention to her, until she accidentally spills a bowl of ramen on you. She gives a short apology before cheerily running off. Since you're not about to let some second-rate character get away with this, you find her at the stand again a few days later and confront her, but she claims to have no idea who you are.

Mystia pulls you aside and explains that the girl is Ellen, and she was in a tragic bullock cart accident many years ago, which gave her convenient Hollywood-style amnesia, and she forgets everything that happened to her over a short period of time.

You decide a woman like that is too much trouble to deal with, so you leave her be and go in search of other, better Touhous.
No. 183676
[x] Watatsuki no Yorihime
No. 183684
Tough crowd.

[X] Watatsuki no Yorihime

Moving on from forgotten Touhous from forgotten Touhous, you instead decide to chase a moon rabbit tail from moon rune print works.

Unfortunately, being a pathetic magic-devoid human with no ability to fly or any helpful connections, you have no means to make your way to the moon. You try jumping for a while, but eventually sprain your ankle and give up.

You didn't want to meet that moon rabbit anyway.
No. 183685
>>183684
[X] Kogasa
No. 183690
>>183684
>2014
>Still trying to physically jump to the moon
ISHYGDDT

[x] Te(w)i
We need a jumping expert
No. 183705
[X] Kogasa

While returning home with your sprained ankle, a parasol is suddenly dropped on your head, while you hear a woman yell "SURPISE!" as your legs are suddenly kicked out from under you, dropping you to the ground. You expect a sudden mugging or murder to follow, but nothing does. As you right yourself and push the parasol away, you see a cute girl staring expectantly at you, asking if you were surprised. Mumbling out a yes, she seems very pleased with this.

Talking with her afterwards, you find that she has no particular malice towards you; but that she just loves to surprise people in any way she can think of. She then surprises you many times over the following years; by agreeing to go out with you, then agreeing to live with you, and finally agreeing to marry you. The two are you are as happy as can be.

Unfortunately this was all a lead in to Kogasa's greatest surprise yet, where you come home to find her naked in bed with a group of other men, who all yell "SURPISE!" as they ejaculate on your wife in unison. She follows this up with a surprising divorce and accusations of domestic violence.

The last one wasn't too surprising, since you'd been beating her on a daily basis.
No. 183706
[x] Mugetsu
No. 183710
[x] Hina

We need to get this bad luck out of our system.

That said, that was a surprisingly positive update
No. 183719
[X] Literally Whogetsu

Suddenly remembering that time you got totally blueballed by the Getsus, you decide to try seeking out the younger Getsu, because younger is always better.

However, as you ask around, you quickly find that nobody, not even the shrine maiden, seems to have any idea who you're talking about. Were the Getsus purely a figment of your imagination? Did you eat too many slices of pizza before bed? Your simple thoughts are interrupted by an ominous voice from behind you.

"I heard you have been looking for me."

You jump at the statement, and turn to see some red, black, and white vaguely samurai-looking dude, who promptly draws his sword and points it towards you.

"Kisama, are you a nakama of Ryuukotsuki!?"

You ask him what the hell he's talking about, and he begins a lengthy explanation of his brothers' deaths and how he, Getsu Fuma, has travelled to Kyouki-tou in his search for his mortal enemy, Ryuukotsuki.

You explain to him that this is actually Gensoykyo, and Kyouki-tou is actually two portals down. Getsu apologises for his foolish mistake, but you assure him that it's fine; this sort of thing happens all the time. He thanks you for your assistance and goes on his way.

Unfortunately, you still haven't resolved the problems of your blue balls. You decide to go home and masturbate, like usual. The smell is really obvious, you know.
No. 183722
[x] Tenshi
No. 183728
[X] Get a fucking job
No. 183729
>>183705
>SURPISE

Twice. Absolutely disgusting.
No. 183731
>>183728
>>183729
No. 183734
[x] Nitori

Our character surely likes thinks on his ass

>>183731
That picture is adorable
No. 183745
[X] Tenshi

You are suddenly woken up by a woman with a stupid hat sitting on top of you in bed and shaking you by the collar. Giving you no time to collect your thoughts or ponder how this woman came to be in your house, she explains that she heard about your recent divorce and as such would like to request that you abuse her too.

You promptly shove her off of you and head for the nearest police station.

The girl follows after you, explaining that she is a huge M, but nobody is willing to hurt her since she's a woman. She sought you out due to your new reputation as a horrible wife basher, and believes you must be her fated one. She grabs onto your arm and insists that you hit her, just a little bit.

You swing your arm to get her off, and she slips, crashes head-first into a nearby lamp post, and promptly falls unconscious. Unfortunately, you had just reached the police station, and the officer inside saw the whole thing.

You try to explain your side of the story, but he isn't impressed when you tell him that she was asking for it.

You spend the night in the lockup with Bubba-san and his little friend, Bubba-chan.
No. 183746
[X] Youmoo
No. 183756
Since the next one will be the last, I'll go with popular vote this time.

[X] Youmoo

Tired of all these recent failures, you head out into your yard to take care of your pet cow, Youmoo. You haven't milked her in a while, so her udders are swollen somewhat.

You relax her by patting her head like usual, and then sit down and begin kneading her udders in order to ease the milk out.
As her teats expand, you make your way down to them and begin squeezing, pouring out bottle after bottle of fresh milk. Youmoo gleefully cries out as you massage her, clearly happy to be relieved after these last few days. With one final squeeze, Youmoo lets out an almighty cry, before collapsing on the ground and breathing heavily. You pat her on the head, feed her some hay, and head back inside to process and drink some of the milk.

You're reminded that your old neighbour used to show unnatural interest towards Youmoo, but thankfully that old zoophile never got anywhere near your girl. Cows are animals. You don't do sexual things with cows.
No. 183759
[x] Yukari
No. 183760
[x] Kourin.
No. 183761
[x]Seiga

Y'know, it would be nice if we actually managed to score properly with the voted girl in the last day, since it's Christmas and all that.
No. 183762
[x]Seija
No. 183763
[x] Yukari
No. 183764
[x] Ruukoto
No. 183766
[X]Kuroki Tomoko
No. 183767
[X] Kana (again)
No. 183769
[x] Yuuka

May as well end this torment, and I can't think of a better-actually there's probably lots of better ways to do this. But I like sunflowers sooooo...
No. 183770
[x] Ran
No. 183771
[x] Letty

It's her season.
No. 183772
[X] Yukari
No. 183774
[x] Yukari Yakumo
No. 183775
Why are people voting after the first vote is already set?
No. 183777
Well, Yukari wins it.

>>183775
You're not the brightest, are you?
No. 183778
>>183777
Oh, I didn't see that.

Silly me.
No. 183780
[X] Yukari

Today's the day. Christmas. It's your last shot, and you've pulled out all the stops to help make this work. You're out to impress one of Gensokyo's finest, after all, and she's already accepted your asking her out today. Thankfully, Chen and Ran both happily approve of you, and they've helped you set up a date that Yukari should be happy with. Now that you're ready, you go pick her up.

Unfortunately, Yukari's place is home to a crowd of people you're not happy to see, and they've apparently all gathered to tell Yukari what a terrible idea it is to date you. As you try to push through them to get inside, you can see Yukari standing in the hallway, being subjected to their advice.



Some dumb looking fairy tells her that you terrorised a bunch of her friends, but since nobody knew who she was, she was largely ignored.
Kotohime tells her that you have no respect for the law.
The five magic stones glimmer angrily.
Gengetsu complains that you left her with blue ovaries.
Rin was about to say something, but was cut off by the giant catfish flopping over onto her.
Cirno complains that you're dead and this is breaking continuity.
Mima isn't here, thankfully.
Alice calls you a thief and says you framed an innocent little girl who she beat up.
Satori insists that you hate animals.
Kana whines about you leaving her homeless, while Kasen opts to punch her in the face as payback.
Reimu makes fun of you for being poor, and claims you owe her money.
Rumia says Alice beat her up but apparently it was your fault.
Shinki still has no idea who you are, but Yumemi seems to believe that you're a male prostitute.
Luize mocks you for being gullible.
Letty says you look just like this frozen specimen she found a while ago.
Ellen seems to have wandered over here, but doesn't know what's going on anyway.
The man on the moon seems to be smirking down at you.
Kogasa insists that you're a wife-basher, while Tenshi complains that you're actually not.
You don't know what Youmoo is doing here, but she moos loudly.



At this point you're finally able to break through the crowd and get to Yukari, who seems more amused than bothered. Before you can come up with an explanation, a commotion in the crowd draws your eye. Why, it's none other than Getsu Fuma! He cuts his way through these vile women, and explains that he's come to repay his debt to you. He tells you to go while he holds them off. You thank Fuma for his aid, and escape out the back door with Yukari.

Before you can explain to Yukari why a bunch of crazy women have come to warn her off of you, she tells you with a bewitching smile that she's never seen a single man cause such a ruckus in Gensokyo, so you must have something special in store for her. Rather than ruin the moment, you assure her that you do, and the two of you go off on your date together.

One night of passionate taiko and aged sake later, Yukari lets you know that she hasn't been this entertained in decades, and neither of you are about to let the night end there. Yukari invites you in, and a few minutes later you're in bed together, passionately kissing. Yukari pulls down her robes, revealing her flower garden to you, and you hastily jam your fertiliser inside.

At that moment, you feel the painful sensation of a penis jamming its way into your anus. Before you can even understand what's happening, the door slams open, and the star reporter Aya Shameimaru busts in, snapping a dozen photos of you in a compromising condition. Following this, Getsu Fuma waltzes in, and as you realise Yukari put a gap over her vagina just as you were about to stick it in, Fuma and Yukari put their faces together and exclaim that you got fuckin' punked, son. The entire thing was a setup, and Yukari is thoroughly entertained with how well it was pulled off. As you struggle to remove your member from your aching anus, Yukari and Fuma begin passionately having sex with each other right in front of you.



Confused and hurt, you make your way home. Youmoo seems to have run off on you, so as you struggle to keep your composer, you pour yourself a hefty helping of alcohol, and speak your mind.

"Honey, why do all these terrible things keep happening to me?" You ask your wife, who is sitting across the room.

Hina sighs, and answers your foolish question. "Don't let it get you down, dear. It's just bad luck."
No. 183783
>You don't know what Youmoo is doing here, but she moos loudly.
Best part

>Youmoo seems to have run off on you

Goddamnit!

>Hina PLOT TWIST

Liked it. Good work Onanimaster.
No. 183786
...What would have happened if we'd picked Hina in an earlier update?
No. 183787
>>183786
I'd have thought of a different finale, since I only came up with the idea while writing it anyway.
No. 183788
>>183787


Good to know. Thank you for writing the story, and for answering my question. Merry Christmas!
No. 183790
I laughed. What a fitting ending.
No. 183868
I ignored this story till now, but I just read it all and was greatly entertained by it for about 10 minutes. Do more.

Also good to see infinitechan is leaking.
No. 183873
>>183868

Whoa! Think I just found a new place to hang out. Thanks Anon.
No. 183894
>>183873
Please do, we need more people on /2hu/
No. 183916
>>183868
>Also good to see infinitechan is leaking.

What does any of this have to do with that place?
No. 183919
>>183916
I suppose it's not necessarily an infinitechan thing, but "Literally Who-getsu" tipped me off. Popular term over the past few months and events surrounding that chan.