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>[x] Oh, forget it, let's just go drink on the roof or something.
"Oh, to hell with it," I mutter, still surly about being bested by upholstery.
"There, there," Clover soothes. "Shall we drink more and forget about it?"
"Until I'm sober, at least," I agree. "Come on, I know just the place."
We have a slightly askance flight, going up, up, up, alighting on the back of Remilia's balcony, stretching around the clock tower where her chambers lie. This way, we shouldn't disturb her (if she sleeps in a coffin, I suspect it'll take more noise than two fairies can produce to get through the pine), and we can still enjoy the brisk air and the view out over the lake. Clover sits on the railing, kicking her feet as I fly a few lazy circles, almost pacing in midair.
"Think they can see us from down there?"
"Almost definitely," I say. "I've never known Meiling not to miss anything that happens on these grounds. ... Sak--"
"The head maid," Clover corrects hastily.
"--The head maid, either." I giggle. "You're flightier than I am, and I'm kinda scared of my own girlfriend."
"Whad'ya mean?" she asks.
"Well, not really, but...basically, this whole thing started because she grabbed my arm really quick, scared the daylights outta me. Well, that and a flirt war."
"A flirt war?" Clover asks. "This I've got to hear."
"It's about what it sounds like," I shrug. "She won, by the way. I didn't stand a chance."
"We need to work on that! You need training!"
"Please no, she's already training me how to fight."
"And how to f--"
She giggles. "Come on, we're drunk and uninhibited. We already girl-talked a bit before you showed up. What's the harm?"
"I dunno, 'zuki, from what she was telling me, you don't have anything to be ashamed of. Especially because I got a glimpse of--"
"I'm only going to get more perverted until you start enjoying yourself," she replies across the top of her wineglass, perched in her fingertips.
"I...all right, fine, what am I supposed to do? Brag?"
"Well, I could try to give you some ideas for next time."
"...Clover, you're a virgin."
"And so were you!" she points out. "Not like I haven't had plenty of time to think about it."
"I'm more than twice your age! And you're saving yourself until you get a ring on your finger!"
She shrugs massively. "Yes, and?"
"...And I don't have a rejoinder for that," I admit.
"Damned right you don't. Now come on, what does Meiling like in bed?"
"Um... A bit of dirty talk."
I hold up my hands. "Nope. Nuh-uh. Drawing the line, that's all you're getting there. Not going into particulars."
"You could write it down."
"Sure, I'll write it in Chinese," I grin. She never learned it, but then again, she didn't have Meiling for that.
"Hey, that gives me an idea. Write stuff on her. I mean, with your tongue."
I should protest that level of lewdness, but hot damn that sounds fun. "Okay, fine, you have my attention. What else?"
"That depends," Clover muses. "Right. Meiling said she really liked seeing you 'assert yourself.' So be bold."
"I dunno, grope her. Play with her a bit."
"Did I hear something about groping?" asks another voice, nearly making me jump clear off the balcony.
She grins. "I saw you up here and figured I'd meet your friend. Not intruding, am I?"
"Well, maybe a bit, y--"
"Not at all!" Clover interrupts me. Gods damn you, Clover! "We're just trying to help his love life. I'm Clover, by the way."
"Charmed," Koa purrs, her tail swishing back and forth as fast as Clover's wings are twitching. "Well then, if it's not too personal, maybe I could offer some pointers?"
Clover makes a show of standing up and circling around Koa, who folds her arms and smiles demurely. "I don't know," Clover says, scrutinizing her intensely. "What are your credentials?"
"Sweetie, I'm a succubus," the familiar replies wryly, "I think I'm qualified."
Clover turns to me, face deadly serious. "She's in."
[ ] The hell she is. This is too much.
[ ] ... You know what? I'm just drunk enough to allow it.
[ ] Write-in