[x] Get Hunting knife.
[x] Search the room for a bag or container for which to store the rifle and ammuntion.

[x] Equip yourself with your weapons.
[x] Try to find some silverware. Something to do with... eating? Being eaten? No, that's silly.

You grab your faithful hunting knife. This knife has served you for so many years of hunting in the great outdoors of..er...wait, no. You've never actually gone hunting. Basically this knife hasn't been anything other than a feeling of security from being able to reach and grab a knife real close-by if someone sneaks into your apartment.

That being done, you search the apartment for a bag that you can use for storing the rifle and its ammunition. All you find is an old backpack, but it's worn too badly to use. You could probably keep other supplies in it, but the rifle is too heavy to hold it, and the ammunition is senseless without the rifle.
Besides, there's no real reason to carry a rifle around. It'll just be suspicious. Unlike a knife, which can be successfully hidden.

That being done, you attempt to find some silverware. You get the distinct feeling of wanting it to be silver. Something to do with...Eating? Being eaten? No, that's silly.
Regardless of the silliness, all you find are some plastic forks and spoons you've been rewashing. Generally you use your pocketknife for cutting food- Ah. There's something to grab. You pocket your pocketknife. A nice long blade, but not too long. Pulling it out in public to do simple knife-like tasks wouldn't make you any suspicious, and it's easier to get at than the hunting knife. It is shorter, though, so it'd be less effective in a fight.

Well, you've decided to carry the hunting knife, the backpack, and the pocketknife with you today.
The hunting knife quickly goes in the backpack. Even if you can conceal it, it's better to be safe than sorry.

.>input

[X] Make sure to get keys and leave, locking apartment afterwards.
[X] Area survey.

[x] Search your fridge, see if you have any bottled water or such.

[x] Wait. You can't go out naked.
[x] Dress for success, or the very least presentable.

Wait.
...
You can't go out like this. You need to put some goddamn clothes on.

Looking through your drawers, you find the nicest clean clothes you have. They're normal streetwear. A button-down short-sleeve shirt and a pair of denim jeans.

You decide to look in the fridge for any bottled water or such.
...Nope. You never were the kind to keep such a thing around. Not much water intake, mostly soda and beer for fluids.
Speaking of which, you grab a couple bottles of beer and put them in the backpack. You may want a couple later, and you get the feeling there won't be a stocked fridge anywhere nearby when you arrive at your destination.

Finally, you grab your keys, mainly to lock up the apartment. They also have the key to your old car, which you had to take to the junkyard when some asshole decided to steal your whole goddamn engine one night while you slept. You're still unsure of how he pulled it off without anyone noticing, but when you tried to start your car the next day nothing happened, and when you popped the hood to find out what was wrong you looked down onto the asphalt of the parking lot.

As such, you've been walking recently. As you've been spending all of your money on expensive habbits, you don't have enough money to place a down payment on a new car without coming dangerously short to having no living expenses. Taking the bus isn't that bad, though, so that's what you've been doing for the past couple of months.

Stepping outside of the apartment, you take a look around. You're on the second floor of the apartment building. The stairs to your left lead down to ground level, where a parkin lot sits. Your designated spot is obviously empty.

As you turn to go down the stairs, you walk into something quite disturbing. A large purple void filled with eyeballs. You must be going crazy or something. Upon realizing this, you decide not to make a big deal of it, just walking forward cautiously until you reach the stairs, where you will feeel that the ground goes down a bit and you'll cautiously walk down them while holding the side. Yeah. That's a plan.

But you never get to put it through to fruition. Upon your first actual step, you suddenly are hit by light. Somehow, it hurts your eyes, as if you've been in a dark room for the past few hours with no sunlight.

...Oh wait, that's right. You have. And until now, your eyes were shaded by the roof.

How odd it is that you're being exposed to the light as openly as this.

When you look around, you find yourself mysteriously teleported to some field. Using the sun and the approximate time you think it is, you figure out which direction is which.

To the north, you see a large lake in the distance. To the east, a large open desert. To the south, the field continues. You see something off in the distance, but you can't make it out. To the west, the field suddenly ends and turns into a dense forest.

.>input

[x] ...
[x] Okay, anywhere BUT the desert.

>>17402
[X] North, toward the lake

You decide to head north to the lake.
Upon arriving, you find a strange girl with ice crystals on her back holding what looks like a frozen frog on the shore.

.>input

[x] Blink once. Blink again. Rub your eyes.
[x] Huh..."Examine the girl in awe.

>>17411
[X] Examine the frozen frog

You blink.
Huh?
You rub your eyes.

...That girl really has ice crystals hanging on her back. Like wings. This is bizarre and fascinating.
The girl. She's got short blue hair. she's wearing a blue dress. She has a green ribbon in her hair.

The ice shatters, the frog shattering with it. Sucks to be the frog.

...And this other frog, which she picked up after complaining about the other one breaking. It froze in her hands.

...Huh.

.>input

[x] Head away from her, this is too weird.

>>17423
[X] "Umm...yhy are you freezing..."
[X] "Wait, no. How are you freezing those frogs?"

[x] They may call you crazy, they may call you criminal, but you've got to do this. You've always wanted to do this.
[x] Hold out a can. "Can you chill this?"

"Umm...Why are you freezing..."
Wait, that's the wrong question.
"Wait. no. HOW are you freezing those frogs?"
"Huh? Who're you?" She jumps back, somewhat surprised by your sudden voice.

.>input

[x] "Me? Good... bad... I'm the guy with..."
[x] Crap! All the training you did over the years to learn memes and old-movie one-liners and it's useless here!

[x] Be a smartass. "I am myself, but who are you?"

"Me? Good...Bad...I'm the guy with-"
Wait.
SHIT.
You left your gun at home!
All the training you did over the years to learn memes and old movie one-liners and it's useless!

You've got to find a different way of dealing with the situation.

.>input

[x] Be a smartass. "I am myself, but who are you?"

[x] "...without a gun. Hm."
[x] "I don't suppose you'd believe that I was the strongest, would you?"

"...Without a gun. Hm." That backfired bigtime.

"In don't suppose you'd believe that I was the strongest, would you?"

"No, I'M the strongest. You're weak."

.>input

[x] "Okay, I believe that you're stronger than me... but THE strongest? What would happen if I met someone that seemed even stronger than you? What would I then call you?"

[x] "If you're the strongest then can I be the cutest?"

>>17436
[X] "Strongest at what?"

[X] "Strongest at what exactly?"

"Strongest at what, exactly?" You ask the girl.
"Everything! Except being weak, I'm the weakest at that!"
Huh.

.>input

>>17519
[x] "So you're not really the strongest, because you are the weakest in being weak!"

"So you're not really the strongest, because you are at the weakest at being weak!"
"But being the weakest at being weak is being the strongest."
"But since you're the weakest at it, you're not the strongest.
"But, uh..." She seems perplexed and distracted by this.

.>input

>>17525
[x] "See? Then you must be the weakest in order to become strongest! It is the truth!"

[x] "It is a mystery."
[x] "Who are we again?"

[x] "It is a mystery."
[x] "Who are we again?"

[x] "To be the Strongest, you also have to be the strongest at being the weakest. You understand? You have to be the strongest while you are the weakest, in other words you have the be the strongest while not being strong"
[x] "It's a mystery isn't it?."
[x] "Who are we again?"

No updates yesterday because I had to drive my mom to the hospital to talk to a crisis worker because she was suicidal.
---
"To be the Strongest, you also have to be the strongest at being the weakest. You understand? You have to be the strongest while you are the weakest, in other words you have to be the strongest while not being strong."
She looks thoroughly confused.
"It's a mystery, isn't it?" She nods.
"...Who are we, again?"
"I'm the strongest and you're the not-strongest."
Damn.

.>input

[X] "So what do you do for fun?"
[X] "Besides... uh... freezing the frogs...."

>>17622
[X] "Are you something other than the strongest?"

"So...Are you something other than the strongest?"
"What? No... Wait, are you asking who I am? That's stupid, everyone knows who I am! Because I'm the strongest!"

.>input

[x] "Who are you?"

"Who are you?"
"You're stupid. How can you not know who I am?"
"Do you not know who you are? That'd make you stupider."
"Of course I know who I am!"
"Then tell me so I know you're not lying."
"I'm Cirno! Of course I know that I'm Cirno, I'm not stupid or anything!"

.>input

[X] Ruffle hair.
[X] "So what do you do for fun? Freeze frogs? That's not something that needs much strength."

>>17637
[X] "Cirno. Alright. Do you know where this is? I seem to be a little lost."

"So what do you do for fun? Freeze frogs? That's not something that needs much strength."
"So what? You're annoying! Eat ice!" she reaches her hand into the water and pulls out a gigantic spear made of ice. She moves her arm back to throw it at you.

Oh god you're going to die

.>input

>>17647
[X] Drop to the ground.
[X] "Doesn't the strongest have something better to do than to kill people that aren't strong?!"

I like using interrobangs

[x] "killing weak people doesn't make you strong"
[x] "if you were truly the strongest you would go fight other strongest people with a witness as proof"

"Killing weak people doesn't make you strong. If you were truly the strongest, you would go fight other strong people with a witness as proof."

She hesitates.

.>input

[X] "Wanna go do something else that doesn't involve murder? It'll be fun!"

[X] Tackle her

"Want to do something else that doesn't involve murder? It'll be fun?"
"Like what?" She cocks her head to the side.

.>input

[X] "Like running through the village naked."

[x] "Booze?"

[x] "open a shop that sells shave ice?"

"Booze?"
"What's booze?"

.>input

>>17736

[x] "Only the greatest fucking drink in the entire goddamn universe. If there had to be only one acheivement in the universe I'd choose booze."

[x] Take out a bottle of beer and open it.
[x] All the cool kids drink it.
[x] This. It makes you drunk.

[x] Booze!
[x] If you don't drink, you lose!
[x] Drink to become strong like an oni!
[x] Drink to turn your brain to macaroni!

You take out a bottle of beer and open it, handing it to her.
"All the cool kids drink it." You feel slightly bad about corrupting youth like this, but... She can fucking make spears of ice. Jesus christ. Does she even need brain cells?
"This makes you drunk."
"But I don't want to be drinked!"
Hahahahahaha. Oh wow.
"No, no one's going to drink you. Just drink it and find out."
She takes a sip. A look goes across her face that tells you she doesn't like it.
Well, when it takes effect, she should.

You remove another bottle from your backpack and open it for yourself, taking a swig.

.>input

[x] Shrug.
[x] "Yeah, it might be too strong for you. Drink it slowly." Reverse psychology!

[x] Shrug.
[x] "Yeah, it might be too strong for you. Drink it slowly.

You shrug.
"Yeah, it might be too strong for you. Drink it slowly."

She glares at you.

Then downs the whole bottle in one motion.

...Wait, what? Wouldn't that hurt really badly?

The alcohol takes effect quicker than you'd expect. Well, she is a kid.
But that's not what matters most. What matters most is that after a few seconds of clutching her stomach, she violently explodes, leaving a red square with a P on it and a bit of foaming beer behind.


....

.......

What the FUCK!"

.>input

[x] Quickquickquick! Grab the P!

[x] Quickquickquick! Grab the P!

[x] Oh, and sip up the foam while you're at it.

You swiftly grab the P.

It doesn't make you feel any better.

.>input

[x] Drink the foam left behind.

[x] Eat the P. Or drink it, you P-drinker you.
[x] With manly tears streaming down your face, swear to avenge your fallen comrade.

[x] Start running and use the power of the P to fly into the sky.

..... What? Wow. Wooooow!

[x] Eat the P. Or drink it, you P-drinker you.
[x] With manly tears streaming down your face, swear to avenge your fallen comrade.

You attempt to eat the P.
It's a bit hard. Not so hard that it breaks teeth, but just enough so that it's unpleasant.

You don't feel any better.

You'd swear to avenge your fallen comrade while manly tears fall, but... She was trying to kill you.

Yeah.

.>input

[x] Start running and call upon the power of the P to jump and then fly.

You start running and attempt to call upon the power of the P to jump and then fly.

Not only does it not work, but it has a negative effect. An unfortunately placed rock causes you to lose your balance while concentrating on running, and you fall face-first into the dirt.

It hurts a bit. You've probably got a few scratches. However, nothing's broken. None of your bones are even bruised. The result is mainly it just failing.

.>input

[X] Pocket the P.
[X] Look around. Where else can we go?

[x] Sigh.
[x] Head further north.

>>17908
...You ate it.
It's gone.
You can't pocket it.

>>17911

Maybe we can poop it out first.

"Sigh." This is irritating. You've potentially wasted a perfectly good power pickup simply because you don't know how the fuck to use it.
Oh well.
Time to get moving.

You decide to continue heading north. This means circling the lake.

After a while of walking around the lake, you arrive on the other side. The mansion's island isn't too far from here, and there's a small dock with a rowboat at the edge of the lake.

.>input

[X] Wait a bit to see if anyone comes to claim the rowboat. Maybe 5 minutes.
[X] If someone comes, ask them to take you to the mansion.
[X] If not, then untie the rope and row there yourself.

[x] untie the rowboat and kick the boat so it drifts away from the dock and continue north

While you're tempted to cross to the island...
That mansion is very creepy. And you don't even know if anyone lives there. You dont' see any docks with boats at them, just a shoreline.

In the end, you decide not to cross the place.

...But for some reason, you get a malicious idea, and execute it. You don't even know why you'd do something so evil as to untie the boat and kick it off into the lake. But you do, leaving anyone else who wishes to cross optionless.

...As soon as it's out of your reach, you begin to feel bad for what you did. It's entirely possible that the reason you don't see any boats on the shore is that this is the boat they use for crossing, and now some poor person is stuck without any way of getting home.

Well, thinking bad thoughts like that isn't good for you.

You begin north. Almost immediately, you run into a forest. A rather dense, dangerous-seeming forest. You wouldn't be surprised if you suddenly got attacked by a rabid grizzly bear or something.

Just as you think this, you hear the sound of a twig snapping nearby.

.>input

[x] Without making a noise, take out your knife in one hand and look around.

Without making a noise, you take out your knife in one hand and look around.

Another twig snaps, on the opposite side of you from the first one.

Either there's multiple things surrounding you, or it's one thing that's VERY sneaky.

...Oh god, it isn't raptors, is it? It's fucking raptors! You're about to be fucking attacked by raptors!

Well, there's still the chance that it's just two rodents of some sort or something of that manner. You've got to keep your hopes up. Thinking about getting attacked by a raptor isn't very good for mental health.

.>input

[x] With your free hand, take out something else as a weapon - even if it's a bottle of beer. Try to put space and a tree between you and the sounds.

With your free hand, you withdraw one of the empty bottles from your backpack, which you somehow kept. Must be a bit of kleptomania catching up with you. You always did have a problem throwing away things that could concievably have SOME use in the future, however unlikely such use may be. Looks like that stuck.
A beer bottle isn't as good a weapon as your knife, but beggars can't be choosers.

...Wait, you have two knives. Why'd you grab the bottle the-

Your thought is suddenly interrupted when you stop hearing. You just...stop hearing. Even when you shout at the top of your lungs, your ears detect no sound.

Then your vision slowly begins to fade. Getting darker and blurrier, until it's pure blackness that would be too blurred to make anything out even if there were light.

This is bad. You're wide open for attack from all sides except for the tree you've positioned behind yourself.

You suddenly feel a hand grab your arm. Sharp fingernails dig in. With two senses knocked out, your sense of feeling is supercharged, and you can feel each individual imperfection in the nails, as they all cause acute pain.

You've got to defend yourself.

.>input

[x] Attack attack attack! Scream, bite, tear, stab, trying to aim for the throat or eyes.
[x] Or maybe shove the bottle of beer into the mouth, hoping to startle it while you smash the jaw from below, hopefully filling it's mouth with jagged glass shards and getting it slightly drunk.

Your intention is to attack. Screaming, though perhaps useless; biting, tearing, stabbing, trying to aim for the throat or eyes.

You don't get the chance, however. Suddenly sight and sound return, just in time to hear a loud thunk. The grip on your arm releases.

Looking down, you find some creature. It appears roughly humanoid, but definitley not human. Whatever it is, you're glad that it appears to be dead now.

Looking at what seems to have stopped it, you find it to be a medium-sized cardboard box. Something tells you never to open the box, as it contains an abomination that should never again see the light of day, or even the darkness of night.

.>input

[x] Pick up the box and throw it into the lake.
[x] Ha ha! You've just contaminated a pristine water supply with pure suck!

[x] inventory

You decide to have a look at the things you've got on your person.
Opening your backpack, you look inside.
The first thing you notice is your hunting knife, the first thing you grabbed, and the last weapon you remembered in battle.
The next is an empty beer bottle. You place the one you have in your hand next to it in the sack. You hadn't thought about it before, but keeping them sounds like a good idea now. The more weapons you have in a place where things attack you seemingly frequently, the better.
The next is a small red marble. You don't remember putting it in there, but whatever. It's inconsequential.

Next, your pockets.
The first thing you find is the knife you had attempted to arm yourself with just now, folded up and back in your pocket.
Next, you fish out your keys. Another potential improvized weapon, though a very, very ineffective one.
Finally, something you don't recognize. You can't tell what it is by the feeling of it. Pulling it out, you take a look at it. It appears to be a small pendant in the shape of an icicle. It's freezing cold to the touch, even though it's been next to your leg. It's also odd to note that you can't feel any of the coldness through clothing, only skin on skin.

Well, that's odd. But whatever.

You suppress the temptation to contaminate a possibly pristine water supply with pure suck, but you refrain. Even the lake doesn't deserve something like that.

.>input

[x] Set fire to the box and leave.

[x] wear pendant
[x] check if box can fit into backpack, if so do it, if not find some sucker to carry it for you

[x] wear pendant
[x] check if box can fit into backpack, if so do it, if not find some sucker to carry it for you

You put the pendant over your head and around your neck. It feels cool against your skin.

Looking at the box...There's no way in hell you're going to be able to carry this. Well, sure, you could carry it in your arms. But what if you got attacked again? Are you going to risk exposing this much fail to the air by throwing it at whatever is attacking you, or swinging it at them for a hole to open? No, you're not going to.

But there's no one around to carry it for you.

The only solution you can think of is to burn it. It's the only way.

But you've got nothing with which to start a fire. You think you learned somewhere how to start a fire by rubbing sticks together or something, but it was so long ago...You were just a child. If you can remember how to accomplish it, you can light this on fire. Otherwise, you're stuck carrying it yourself.

.>input

[X] Walk around by kicking the box ahead of you.
[X] Or just carry it you lazy git.
[X] Head onward into the forest. Call out "Marco" to see if you can attract the attention of anyone who doesn't want to eat you.

[x] You're pretty sure the best way to deal with hazardous materials is to leave them around where impressionable young children can go out and play with them.
[x] Just doing Darwin's dirty work and all that.

You decide to walk around kicking the box ahead of you. You begin walking forward, deeper into the desert.

The deeper you get, the darker it seems to get in the forest. Looking up, the sky is just as bright as it should be, and there aren't really that many trees to block out all of the light. It's as if something is keeping half of the light from reaching the forest floor.

You have an urge to shout out "Marco!" to see if you can attract the attention of someone who doesn't want to eat you. You stop yourself, though, when you realize that it'll also attract the attention of anyone who DOES want to eat you.

.>input

[x] See if you can somehow write on the box "TASTY FOOD" and leave it out in the open to lure and trap anything that would eat you.

[x] Life is overrated, anyways! Call out "Marco" and attract someone's attention.

A genius idea comes to you.
You can effectively use this box as a rather effective weapon by writing "TASTY FOOD" on it and leaving it out in the open to lure and trap anything that would eat you.

...But you have no writing utensils, so that doesn't work.

You get an even stronger urge to call out "Marco" to attract someone. You suppress it once again.

.>input

[x] Just keep on walking and you shall be free! That's how you're gonna make history!

[x] Just keep on walking with the box. You're sure that you can put it somewhere where someone will pay you to get rid of it.

[x] start shouting "TASTY FOOD IN A BOX" out loud
[x] if someone comes tell them all the food contents in the box is hers to eat but she have to open the box while you keep a good distance away but enough to see what's happening if anything goes wrong

You decide to just keep on walking.

After what seems like a couple miles, you reach another edge of the forest and come across a wasteland. It's not quite the same as the desert; there's plantlife, and streams. And its' a bit cold for a desert.
It continues on up north. To the east, it runs into that same desert. To the west, some small hills which stretch north until they meet a large mountain.

.>input

[x] Head to the mountains.

You decide to head northwestish towards the mountain.
On the way there, your path gets interrupted by a chasm thats just wide enough not to be jumpable. While it's not really all that deep, you'd probably at least break something if you jumped down, and there may not even be a way back up.

.>input

[x] A chasm? Amuse yourself by yelling into it and hearing the echo.
[x] After that, stretch a bit before trying to find a bridge or something.

[x] A chasm? Amuse yourself by yelling into it and hearing the echo.
[x] After that, stretch a bit before trying to find a bridge or something.

You decide to amuse yourself by yelling down into it and hearing the echo.
Oddly, no echo comes. That's a bit strange, but whatever.

You stretch a bit, then head off to find a bridge or something. Instead of finding a bridge, however, you find the end of the actual chasm. You're quite a bit more to the northeast, now, and you're at the edge some of the small hills. As the hills go, they're just covered in tall grass. However, the actual mountain has forests that climb halfway up it, at which point the trees begin thinning out until near the top, where there's none left at all.

But there's a stream in the way of you getting to the mountain. It's a bit too wide to jump, but you could wade across. However, that would mean getting wet.
To the east, the wasteland almost reaches an end at another large forest. Further than that, you see the giant desert, stretching across the whole left edge of the land you've been at so far. The dynamic nature of this land is somewhat startling, and there's more different types of landscapes than you'd actually expect to find anywhere. Well, shows how much you know about geography.
You can't see towards the west, as there's some small hills in the way. If you climbed up them, you could probably see, but not like this.
To the south, there's more of that forest.

.>input

Whoops, forgot my trip. I cleared my browser's cookies and such.

[x] Take off shoes, roll up pants. Wade across stream.

>>18333

[X] That, but also take off socks. No one likes soggy socks.

You remove your shoes and socks. You think to remove your pants, but decide against it as you don't know if anyone will come by. Besides, if you got attacked by something, you'd be less likely to actually keep them when you start running away if you choose to do so, and they'd be in the way if you were to try and fight whereas they'd protect you more being worn. So instead, you just roll them up as far as you can, and hopefully they won't get very wet.

You make it across, but unfortunately you hadn't rolled them up high enough. The pants are now slightly damp, and definitely uncomfortable to walk in. If it got even a little bit colder, you can imagine it would be horrible to walk around in them. Still better than being pantless though.

.>Input

[X] Continue on to the mountain.
[X] Grab a long stick to use as a walking aid.
[X] Try to follow any trails, if there are any.

[x] Go up the mountain in your self-taught mix of the "Sturdy-Footed Llama Style" and the "Wily Goat Form"

You continue walking towards the mountain. Eventually you happen upon a path which leads in its general direction, and deciding that following a path is better than getting lost, you follow it.
Along the way, you look around for something suitable as a walking stick, but find nothing of the sort.

Eventually, you reach the bottom of the mountain.
Just as you're about to begin climbing up, you hear what sounds like a cannon firing, and suddenly the ground right next to you isn't there and there's dirt falling out of the sky everywhere.

.>input

[X] HIT THE FUCKING DECK!

[x] You've trained for this scenario countless times in video games. Run away from the crumbling dirt as fast as you can while still maintaining a eye forward so you can properly time your jumps.

[x] You've trained for this scenario countless times in video games. Run away from the crumbling dirt as fast as you can while still maintaining a eye forward so you can properly time your jumps.

You've trained for this scenario countless times in videogames. You run away from the crumbling dirt as fast as you can while still maintaining an eye forward so you can properly time your jumps.
As you run forward, you find yourself about to run into a large river. Due to running faster than you normally would be able to due to the adrenaline rush, you find yourself unable to stop yourself before you trip and fall in, getting yourself thorougly soaked in the process.

"Hahahahaha! That'll teach you to tresspass on the mountain!" A rather young-sounding female voice from right behind you speaks. When you turn around to look, however, you find no one.
Huh. Were you just attacked by a ghost? A...Cannon wielding ghost?

.>input

[x] Twist yourself around, using your legs and your trunk in order to splash water droplets into the air all around yourself, in hopes that they will impact something.

You twist yourself around, using your legs and your trunk to splash water droplets into the air all around yourself, in an attempt to see if they hit anything and give away a position of something.
They do, and you see them hang in air. The way they start sliding down makes you realize that the form is human-like. And looks to be quite young.

It apparently notices that you've noticed it, though.
"Aeh!?" she suddenly squeals, and begins retreating.

.>input

[x] "Hey, wait!"
[x] Attempt to grab her if you can.

"Hey, wait!" you exclaim, trying to rush and grab a hold of her. However, she runs more quickly than you, and with her speed the drops of water all fly off of her, ending your ability to see her. You're slightly disappointed, but then you realize that she shot a CANNON at you.

.>input

[x] Damnit.
[x] Contaminate the river with that mysterious box you've been kicking around--wait, you don't have that anymore.
[x] Throw a beer bottle in seeming frustration, then go out of the water, walk a bit then hide. Watch the beer bottle to see if seems to get an invisible person to pick it up, and if so launch your counterattack - you want that cannon.

[x] As above, but get the girl instead.

[x] Yell out "Wait, I think you dropped your underwear or something!"

"Hey, wait. I think you dropped your underwear or something!"

No response. You're not sure if she's even nearby anymore.
Well, one way to find out...

.>input

[x] Shrug, keep her underwear and keep walking.

[X] Follow the path of footprints, if there are any.

You briefly look for a path of footprints, but you find none. It's as if she were floating in the air rather than walking.
Oh well. Might as well keep these, then.

The underwear goes straight into your backpack.

You continue walking, reaching the side of the mountain. Instead of a cannon, this time you find yourself being aimed at by a large cluster of long green beams.

.>input

[x] Man, your mother was right when she said you'd better eat all your green beams! Beans. Whatever.

[x] You may hate these kinds of puzzles, but your persistance and the power of save/load means that you've had countless hours dealing with this sort of thing. Pay very careful attention to the patterns and duck and weave your way through this mess.

You pay careful attention to the patterns and attempt to duck and weave your way through the mess.
However, you fail horribly, and are repeatedly slammed into by the bursts of energy. They don't physically harm you, but it hurts like a son of a bitch.
The assault stops as you get further away from the mountain.

Seems like you're unwanted.

.>input

[x] Walk away, resolving to find that box and contaminate their water supply soon.

You walk back away from the mountain, towards the small stream where you got your pants wet before. As you're already very wet from falling in the larger river flowing down the mountain, you can't think of a reason to worry about getting wet by just wading in.

That is, if you decided to just wade in. There's other directions you can take.

.>input

[x] Just follow along the stream this time. Very hard to get lost that way, and there's usually a higher chance of interesting places and people by streams anyway.

You just follow the stream this time. Very hard to get lost that way, and there's usually a higher chance of interesting places or people by streams anyway.

You get stopped about a kilometer downstream by a woman with blonde hair in a purple dress.

"You're lost."
"Well, yeah." You've got no better way to respond.
"But that's no good. You can't just get lost a couple hours after coming here. That's how you get killed, especially traveling through the forest."
"So..?"
"So I'll take you wherever you want to go. Just say the name of a destination, even if you don't know what the desination is. Oh, and it has to be in or connected to Gensokyo. Otherwise it wouldn't be any fun."

.>input

[x] "Your place."
[x] "Errr, that didn't come out right."
[x] OR DID IT?

[x] "Your place."
[x] "Errr, that didn't come out right."
[x] OR DID IT?

The first thought that comes to your mind is the one you choose to go with.
"Your place." You state. Only after the words leave your mouth do you realize the implications.
"Hmm? How bold~ But I'm going to have to deny that one."

.>input

[x] Roll your eyes.
[x] "Someplace fun."

[X] "Then how about mine?"

"Then how about mine?" You may as well try and play this to the end.
"While what you're implying sounds fun, overall it is no good."

.>input

[x] Roll your eyes.
[x] "Someplace fun."

[X] "How about the closest place with people?"

Note that 'people' can be used to mean non-humans as well, so this person is free to take us to the tengu settlement, or to the various other locations where youkai can be found. Of course, we can always end up in the human village watching Yuuka fight Keine while this weird guy and Rumia get bugged by a planet youkai....

"How about the closest place with people?"
"Hmm...Okay. It'll be fun to see yourself get out of this one~"

You find yourself falling through the air, landing hard on your ass. Looking around, there's a lot of people with dog ears and tails.
Just a moment later, there's a lot of people with dog ears and tails and spears pointed at your face, and a moment after that a lot of people with dog ears and tails carrying you rather forcefully blindfolded around somewhere.

Quite a few more moments later, you feel yourself dropped on a hard concrete or rock ground. Your blindfold is removed, and a metal gate is closed, locking you in a dark room with stone walls, lit only by a candle outside the gate.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?" A silver-haired girl, again with dog ears and tail, and instead of a spear a long sword pointed at your face. She's hefting the whole weight with just one hand, which is odd. It's goddamn huge.

.>input

[x] "A-a-aliens!"
[x] Speak slowly and clearly, like you were a tourist in a foreign country.
[x] "HELLO. I COME IN PEACE. I AM NICE. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

[x] "A-a-aliens!"
[x] Speak slowly and clearly, like you were a tourist in a foreign country.
[x] "HELLO. I COME IN PEACE. I AM NICE. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

[x] "I asked to be taken to the closest place with people. I'm not stuck in some invitation-only cosplay/furry event, am I?"

[x] "I asked to be taken to the closest place with people. I'm not stuck in some invitation-only cosplay/furry event, am I?"

[x] "I asked to be taken to the closest place with people. I'm not stuck in some invitation-only cosplay/furry event, am I?"

"I asked to be taken to the closest place with people. I'm not stuck in some invitation-only cosplay/furry event, am I?"
"Furry?"
"Uh, people who are sexually attracted to animals and often dress up as them."
She now looks visibly irritated.
"You look here. These are real ears. They aren't fake. And furthermore, I'm not attr- WAIT. "asked to be taken to the closest place with people." Who did you ask this to, again?"

.>input

[x] "Some blonde in a purple dress."
[x] "And what do you mean, those are real?"
[x] Look like someone's playing a joke on you, in hopes that she'll be forced to allow you to touch them to make sure.

[x] "Some girl with blonde hair in a purple dress. Said something about it not being any fun if I got lost in "Gensokyo."

[x] "Some girl with blonde hair in a purple dress. Said something about it not being any fun if I got lost in "Gensokyo."

Damn that Yukari.

[x] "Some girl with blonde hair in a purple dress. Said something about it not being any fun if I got lost in "Gensokyo."

"Some girl with blonde hair in a purple dress. Said something about it not being any fun if I got lost in 'Gensokyo.'"
"...Blonde hair and a purple dress. That would imply Yukari." She makes herself slightly less threatening.
"DO YOU FUCKING THINK I'M GOING TO BELIEVE THAT STORY?!" She jabs your throat with her sword again.
"That's the same story everybody gives. Do you think I'm going to believe it just because you're dressed oddly and talk weird?"

Looks like she doesn't believe you.

.>input

[x] "Yeah, says the furry-in-denial."

"Yeah, says the furry-in-denial." Before you can prevent yourself, it slides out of your mouth on its own.
The blade sticks into your neck a little harder.
"Don't ever call a tengu that again. Ever." Even harder. Just a tiny movement from either of you and your skin will be broken.
"Got it?"

.>input

[x] "Pft, whatever. I told my story."

[x] Make yiffing sounds

[x] Okay, fine.
[x] I found myself in a strange land with only a few tools on me. I met a strange girl that wanted to freeze me hard, but I countered by filling up with my own golden brew that she imploded, her P leaving her body.
[x] I then made my way to the more interesting spot, the mountain. I was then shot by an invisible girl who, in apparent contrast to biology or gender roles, apparent had a massive... thing that shot gobs and gobs of white at me. Not taking that lying down, I countered with my own splash, suddenly coating her body so she runs away, but not before leaving her underwear behind in her confusion.
[x] I then was assaulted on all sides by green beams, somehow survived that, and then decided to follow the stream out of here.
[x] Then, I met said purple-dressed blonde who then refused my requests to take me to a possible safe place at her or my home, finally agreed to send me here.

[x] Okay, fine.
[x] I found myself in a strange land with only a few tools on me. I met a strange girl that wanted to freeze me hard, but I countered by filling up with my own golden brew that she imploded, her P leaving her body.
[x] I then made my way to the more interesting spot, the mountain. I was then shot by an invisible girl who, in apparent contrast to biology or gender roles, apparent had a massive... thing that shot gobs and gobs of white at me. Not taking that lying down, I countered with my own splash, suddenly coating her body so she runs away, but not before leaving her underwear behind in her confusion.
[x] I then was assaulted on all sides by green beams, somehow survived that, and then decided to follow the stream out of here.
[x] Then, I met said purple-dressed blonde who then refused my requests to take me to a possible safe place at her or my home, finally agreed to send me here.

"Pft, whatever. I told my story."
"Fine. If you don't want to cooperate, neither will we."
She gets up and leaves the cell, locking it behind her.

.>input

[x] Cry out against prisoner abuse

[x] Just fucking sleep.

[x] Just fucking sleep.

[X] Just fucking sleep.

You decide to just go to sleep.

Just as about you're about to fall asleep, you're awoken by a loud noise. Needless to say, being awoken so suddenly does not feel good.

"Hiya, I heard there was a suspicious person in a detaining cell and thought I'd take a look!"

An extremely hyper-looking girl with black wings on her back beams at you. She's wearing a short black skirt and a white shirt. She has a strange hat on her head with white puffs or something hanging from it.

.>input

[x] "Wha huh?"
[x] "Oh, hi. By the way, whoever that was earlier didn't want me telling anybody that she was sexually attracted to animals, so don't tell her that I said that, because I didn't, okay?"

[x] "You look cute. What's your name?"

[x] "Huh? Oh, it's just Shameimaru Aya."

[x] "Huh? Oh, it's just Shameimaru Aya."

We have meta-knowledge, seeing as we played SWR earlier today.

"Huh? Oh, it's just Shameimaru Aya."
"Hey, don't say 'just' Shameimaru Aya! It's an incredible honor to be interviewed by the fastest in Gensokyo!"
"Whatever, I'm trying to sleep."
You close your eyes in an attempt to do just that, when her foot pushes down on your chest.
"No, no, you can't go to sleep in the middle of an interview."
You open your eyes to address her.
"Who said I wanted to get interviewed? I'm trying to sleep, goddamnit."
"Hmm. I guess I'll just leave you in here alone then." She makes for the door to your cell.

.>input

[x] "Shhhh! Not so loud."
[x] "You can try hearing me talk in my 'sleep'."

[x] "Fine, I'll do your interview if it'll get me out of here faster.

[x] "Fine, I'll do your interview if it'll get me out of here faster."

[x] "Fastest, huh? That's what my ex said about me!"

[x] "How about we have that interview in a much more reasonable environment? Say... your room? I find prison walls so dreary to my creativity."

[x] You can't just say Motherfucker Andablowjob, so just make something up real quick...

"Fine, I'll do your interview if it'll get me out of here faster."
"Alright! Wha-"
"Wait, hold on. How about we have this interview in a much more reasonable environment? Say... Your room? I find prison walls so dreary for my creativity."
"My room, you say? Could it be you're trying to use me as a tool for escape? I can't let that happen!" She pulls out a pen and notebook and writes something down.

"So, interview. First of all, what's your name?"

.>input

>>18914

[x] "John"

[x] "John."

[x] You can't just say Motherfucker Andablowjob, so just make something up real quick...
--[x] Dick Andagoodname?

>>18917

No.

[x] "John."

"John."
"Hmm...That's a weird name. I bet you were picked on as a kid. Oh well, next question. Where are you from?"

.>input

[x] "My home."

[x] "Earth. 3rd Planet in the solar system."

[x] "Earth. 3rd Planet in the solar system."

[x] "Hollywood."

[X] Corneria, fourth planet in the Lylat system.

"Earth. Third planet in the solars system."
"Well yeah, the rest of us too. Be more specific."

.>input

[x] "New York, USA."

[X] Compton, CA

[X] Compton, CA

[x] "Uh, okay."
[x] "Wait, you mean you're not an alien or a furry?"

"Uh, okay."
...
"Wait, you mean you're neither an alien or a furry?"
"That's right~ If you want, I'm sure I can get the kappa to make me a probe, though, if you want."

.>input

[x] Use your powers to discretely change the topic of conversation!
[x] "I'm from a place called ----"

[x] "I've always prefered to be the one doing the probing thank you very much, especially when the other party involved is someone as cute as you."

[x] Use your powers to discretely change the topic of conversation!
[x] "I'm from a place called ----"

"I've always preferred to be the one doing the probing, thank you very much. Especially when the other party is someone as cute as you."
"Why thanks. But we're getting off-topic. Why did you come to Youkai Mountain?"

.>input

[x] To meet girls.
[x] Seriously? Apparently, it was the closest place with people.

[x] "Some person in a purple dress teleported me here."

[x] "Some person in a purple dress teleported me here."

"To meet girls."
She pauses for a moment to write something.
"...Being serious, some person in a purple dress teleported me here. Apparently, it was the closest place with people."
"I see. Next question. What do you know about the incident that just got resolved?"

.>input

[x] "What are you talking about?"

[x] "The what?"

"The what?"
"You know, the incident that the people who settled on the mountain recently caused."
"What are you talking about?"
"You really don't know about the incident?"

.>input

[x] "I just got to wherever this place is."

[x] "I just got to wherever this place is."

[x] "Is it about me trespassing?"

"Is it about me tresspassing? If me tresspassing is such a big deal that you consider it a special "incident", I'll leave right now."

"I see." She jots down something in her notebook.

"And my final question. Has anything weird happened to you recently?"

"..."

You just stare at her. Does she really need to ask that question, given the ones you've already answered?

.>input

[X] "I've become strangely attracted to you."

"Well, I've become strangely attracted to you."
"I see." She jots that down in her notebook, not showing any different emotion from the rest of your answers.
"Well, you're probably going to be stuck in here until you die. Have a nice day." And she leaves the cell.

Damn it.

.>input