Archived Thread

File 125152925413.jpg - (313.40KB , 916x1200 , Braun_HF_1.jpg ) [iqdb]
374 No. 374


You wake up tired one monday after a long night of playing Scarlet Weather Rhapsody. You find yourself feeling like something dangerous is going to happen today. You are in a one-room apartment, cheap because you need money to fuel your nerdy habits.
On the north wall of the room, there is a computer desk with a computer on it. West wall you have a closet with your hunting rifle and ammunition in it. The south wall of your room has your bed, with your hunting knife stuck between the matress and box spring. To the west is the exit.


No. 428
[x] Remember to shove some more cans of dog food to the cage you keep annoying door-to-door salespeople in. You forgot last week, let's do better this time.
No. 431
After knocking out another one of your OCs; that planet youkai.
No. 432
Oh, right. You haven't been tending to your cage. The one you keep annoying door-to-door salespeople in. You forgot to feed them last week, so you should try better this time. When they die of starvation, they pretty quickly start smelling really bad and the neighbors start asking questions and you have to tell them that you plugged up a rathole and the rat inside probably died, or something. Apparently, rats are enough of a problem in this city for people to believe that story.

Anyway, time to go buy some more cans of dog food. You'd probably buy dry dog food normally because its' cheaper, but you know it's got to be worse to be fed wet dog food than dry dog food. It has to be. There's much more squick factor.

You grab your wallet and step out the door, straight into what looks like the waiting room for an office. A hand reaches out through another, smaller gap to whack you in the head with a rolled up piece of paper, then drops it and lets it fall to the floor. From the looks of it, it's a note of some kind.

No. 434

[x] Read that note.
No. 439
You pick up the note from the ground and read it. It's a note, written in your own handwriting, reminding you of an apointment you had to meet in the office that this is the waiting room for. Of course, you never wrote this note, so how it exists is an enigma.

No. 443
[x] Tear up the note and ignore the obvious plot hook. Drive back home.
No. 466
You attempt to tear the note up and ignore the obvious plot hook, with the intention of driving back home. However, you find that the note is made of adamantium, and as soon as you try ripping it it suddenly gains all the weight of said metal. Not expecting this, and therefore not using enough muscle to hold up the weight of adamantium but rather just a note, it slips out of your fingers and falls on your foot. You're going to feel that for a while.

No. 471
[x] Pick up the note and crease it into the Adamantium Paper Sword from Hell!
No. 472
[x] Limp away to the hospital.
No. 489
But the pain in your foot is nothing. Holy shit, it's a fucking piece of adamantium paper! Time to crease it into the Adamantium Sword from Hell!

It proves a lot harder than you thought, but with extreme willpower and lots of time, you manage to bend the unbendable adamantium into the shape of a sword. However, it's a tiny sword no larger than a dagger. Oh well, it was a normal piece of paper. It's rather dull, though.

No. 492
[x] Walk back home.
No. 496
The next thing you decide to do is walk back home. So you walk over to the door leading outside and open it, closing it behind you. You find yourself in the middle of a large forest. Behind you, the door stands on its own. When you look behind it, there's just more forest. Opening the door normally, using the handle, reveals the same room you were just in. Well, good thing the door didn't disappear. You're not sure whether you'd rather be in there or out here.

The sound of a twig snapping comes from far off.
..far enough off that it's more like the sound of the trunk of a tree snapping. Shit.

No. 497
[x] Find a magazine, open up to the center and lay a roll of pennies along the spine. Roll it up, when you jab with it you can give people a papercut from hell.
No. 499
Ignoring the sound, you step back into the office waiting room and look around for a magazine. You have an awesmoe plan to make a weapon that will give a papercut from hell. However, just as you're about to grab one, it disappears with a flash of purple.

From outside the door, you hear the cracking sound of another tree being snapped. This time it's much closer.

No. 501
[x] See if you can manage your way back home, opening up the cage to provide a tasty distraction for the tree-snapper.
No. 504
You attempt to find a way back home, but right when you open the door and step outside your entire body is engulfed by the t-rex waiting for you outside.


[ ] Back ? choices
No. 505
[x] Back a choice, and then try to sneak past the T-Rex so you can hijack it's F-14.
No. 507
You attempt to sneak past the T-rex so you can hijack it's F-14. However, the snakes got to it before you do and now you're stranded in front of a very hungry t-rex.

No. 509
[x] Remember the Law of Nature, Red in Tooth and Claw : Eat or Be Eaten.
[x] Eat the T-Rex.
No. 513
[x] Reach into your pocket and take out your shock-resistant, mechnically-motion powered radio and set it to a local hip-hop station. Set the volume all the way up and throw it into the T-Rex's nose so it either has to commit suicide or listen to that stuff for all eternity (all while everyone else thinks it's actually doing the singing).
No. 515
You remember hearing somewhere the Law of Nature, Red in Tooth and Claw, which states eat or be eaten, and you are tempted to eat the T-rex.
However, a better idea comes to you. You pull out your portable radio and put it on a hip-hop station, with the intent to shove it up the t-rex's nose. It mauls you a bit before eating you as punishment for attempting something so horrible.


[ ] Back ? choices
No. 521
[x] Okay, fine. Let's just let ourselves BE railroaded. See if we care. (Harumpf.)
No. 527
Fine, you'll just let yourself be railroaded. See if you care.

But because the writer doesn't have anything planned at all and is just bad ending you for the hell of if, this results in you just sitting there while the t-rex tears down the door to the office lobby and then gobbles you up.


[ ] Back ? choices
No. 528
[x] board the Union Pacific at the station.
No. 531
You think to board the Union Pacific at the station, but there's a t-rex in the way.

No. 532
[x] Call upon the forces of raw, uncontrolled magic to invoke a storm of pure magical energy near the T-rex for a split second, making damn sure you're out of the area of effect beforehand.
No. 534
You invoke a storm of pure magical energy near the t-rex for a split second, causing nothing to physically happen. However, a few minutes later you hear a loud sound that sounds like some kind of sci-fi lazer outside, and then a loud thud as if something huge just fell to the ground.

No. 546
[x] Examine source of the sounds
No. 555
You go outside to examine the source of the sounds. A girl wearing a witch costume, hoding some octagon thing in one hand and a bamboo broom in the other, stands before the fallen t-rex scratching her head as if confused about something.

No. 560
[x] Wave to Marisa
No. 562
You wave to Marisa. She looks at you for a second, then continues staring at the t-rex and scratching her head.

No. 581
The door behind you suddenly spontaneously combusts, and doesn't stop burning until it's a pile of ash that definitely can't be opened again. Looks like you're stuck.

No. 604
[X] Consume the ashes to make the door's powers your own.
No. 607
just want to point out, if the door is a pile of ash, then it is, by any definition, no longer a door but a hole in the wall.

Feel free to traverse said hole.
No. 608
Oh, Anon. You and your inability to free yourself from the constraints of common sense.
No. 641
You consume the ashes in an attempt to make the door's powers your own, but you soon find out that the door never had any powers. You decide that you'd like to walk through the hole in the wall left behind by the door not being there anymore, but look up and find it quite obvious that there IS no hole in the wall. There isn't a wall for there to be a hole in. There was just this door hanging in space with a portal to another space. And now both the door and portal are gone. Huh.

You now no longer need breakfast, though.

No. 652
[X] Tackle Marisa, there's a T-rex in front of her!
No. 655
You attempt to tackle Marisa. Afterall, there's a T-rex in front of her! But right before you connect, a portal like the one before opens up directly behind her, with its end point being directly in front of her, resulting in you falling face-first onto the ground in front of her. Ow.

No. 657
[X] Look up her dress
No. 658
You attempt to look up your dress, but by the time you reverse your direction, you find that she is now kneeling down in front of you.

"Who're you -ze?"

No. 661
[X] "I like your hat. You are very cute."
No. 662
[X] "Hello, citizen! I am Batman. You can be my assistant! Would you like that? Would you like to ride with Batman?"
No. 664
"Hello, citizen! I am Batman. You can be my assistant! Would you like that? Would you like to ride with Batman?"

"Oh, so you're a bat youkai -ze. But you don't have wings, -ze.
No. 666
[X] Explain that ninjas have kidnapped your wings, and ask Marisa if she is a bad enough dude to rescue them
No. 669
"The ninjas have kidnapped my wings. Are you a bad enough dude to rescue them?"


She suddenly jumps onto her broom and flies off somewhere random, leaving you alone in a forst clearing with a small amount of burnt door that you didn't eat yet and a t-rex carcass.

No. 672
[X] Explore the innards of the T-rex
No. 674
You attempt to explore the innards of the t-rex, but without something to cut a hole, you are unable to make yourself a way to get in. After all, your adamantium-paper sword is still rather dull, and useless for cutting.

No. 675
[X] Enter through the mouth you stupid fuck
No. 676
You'd attempt to enter through the mouth, but it is firmly shut and all attempts to open it fail. It's probably a combination of the thing being huge and rigor-mortis setting in a lot more quickly than should be possible, somehow.

No. 677
[X] Call for Marisa
No. 678
[X] Call for Tewi
No. 679
[X] Call for Tewi

what could possible go wrong
No. 680
You call out for Tewi. Suddenly, tengu ninjas, thousands of them.


No. 681
[X] Start crying, because you are fucked.
No. 682
You start crying, because you're fucked.

"...Hey, man, I didn't know you cared about your wings that much." the ninja who stole your wings gives them back.

Then everything goes black as a bag is pulled over your head and you are knocked out by a blow to the head.

You wake up in a dark room.

No. 683
[x] Attack the darkness
No. 684
You attack the darkness for 1 point of damage. The darkness attacks back for 20 points of damage.

You wonder how either of you managed to do "points" of damage, but such a subject will just cause headaches.

No. 685

[x] Use echolocation to figure out how the room is structured.
No. 686
You attempt echolocation. You find that the room is fairly squareish.

No. 687
.>Close your eyes, sit down, and wait.
No. 688
You close your eyes, sit down, and wait. This results in you falling asleep.

You dream of...

No. 690
[X] Dreams of Sunshine
No. 692
[x] Dream of devouring all.
No. 700
You dream dreams of sunshine. Nothing much happens, other than sunshine.

It's still bitch-black in the room when you wake up.

No. 702
[x] You've got wings now don't you? See if you can fly.
No. 703
You DO have wings now, but they arne't connected. Unless you want to hold them in your hands and flap about like an idiot, there's no way to test your flight ability.

No. 705
[x] Attach the wings to your back.
No. 706
You stuble around in the dark looking for some duct table, but it's no good. It's too dark in here.

No. 707
lol typo
No. 709
You say no butt wings, fine. But I can't hardly figure out a better plan...

.>Close your eyes again, but try not to fall asleep this time. Try meditating.
No. 710
[x] Turn on the light you silly sausage.
No. 711
You close your eyes again, trying not to fall asleep again. You begin meditating.

Just as you're about to empty your mind, a LOUD siren whines like right over your head, almost giving you a heart attack. You still can't see shit, and as soon as your eyes open the sound stops.

No. 720
[x] Deny the fact that the room is dark and state the fact that you can see clearly.
No. 721
[x] Take off your siren-hat.
No. 722
[x] Challenge the darkness to yakyuken
No. 724
You deny the fact that the room is dark and state the fact that you can see it clearly.

The darkness ignores you.

The next thought is to challenge it to yakyuken, or strip rock-paper scissors.

But what do you choose first?

No. 730
[x] Rock! How can you lose with ROCK?
No. 735
[x] Choose all three, using one of your feet as 'Paper'.
No. 874
You issue your challenge, then make your choice: rock.

A dark hand comes from the darkness signifying its choice of paper.


Well, good thing this game is best out of three.

No. 875
[x] Paper while hoping that Tewi is lurking about
No. 877
You choose paper.

The black hand chooses scissors.

Your vision fades. You see a faint logo in the darkness. Something hits you in the head, hard, and then you black out.

When you wake up, you're in the dark room again, but in a different spot. You can tell becasue you're not up against a wall and there's no walls within range of your reach.

No. 882
Check my state of dress, or lack thereof.
No. 884
Remember that you have the powers of a god, and that god is the 'GOD OF LIFE AND DEATH!!!' Now go and take over this pathetic world. I suggest you go and deal with that Gap Demon first. We don't want her to screw you over somehow. Try killing her minions first, that way she has nothing to fall back on.
No. 894
[x] Say "Pazazu" three times.
No. 898


[X] Say "Beetlejuice" three times.
No. 902

Do it.
No. 907
[+] Hastur, Hastur, Hastur.
No. 911
[x] Say "this thread sucks" or "This thread is awesome", thus destroying the 4th wall and making it possible to escape through where it once was.
No. 984
"THIS THREAD IS OKAY I GUESS!" you shout, immediately shattering the one-way glass that makes up the fourth wall with your bellowing voice.

You climb through the hole that said wall breaking created.

You are now with the audience.

No. 985
[x] Ask the audience if they have any duct tape.
No. 989
[x] Arrest the audience for being disgusting freaks.
No. 994
"Anyone here have any duct tape?" you ask. The three people present respond with a "no."

No. 1030
[x] Wonder how you know there's three people here, if you can't see them.

[x] Challenge them to yakyuken
No. 1037
[x] Ask if any of them has a heavy-duty industrial roller hander, and if anyone else has some ducks to feed into them.
No. 1070
You suddenly wonder how you know there's 3 people here when it's so dark.
You then realize that the computer screens that they are using to watch with are all giving off light. How you're next to all three of them is a mystery, though. Probably Yukari's fault.

You challenge one of them to Yakyuken. They seemingly ignore you, intead saying "Wonder how there's three people here, if you can't see them. Then, challenge them to Yakyuken." bizarre.

No. 1071
[x] Run over to one of their keyboards and type in "[x] Run over to one of their keyboards and type in "[x] Run over to one of their keyboards and type in "[x] Run over to one of their keyboards and type in "[x] Run over to one of their keyboards and type in "[x] Run over to one of their keyboards and type in "[x] Run over to one of their keyboards and type in "
No. 1075
Loading last save point...


You wake up tired one monday after a long night of playing Scarlet Weather Rhapsody. You find yourself feeling like something dangerous is going to happen today. You are in a one-room apartment, cheap because you need money to fuel your nerdy habits.
On the north wall of the room, there is a computer desk with a computer on it. West wall you have a closet with your hunting rifle and ammunition in it. The south wall of your room has your bed, with your hunting knife stuck between the matress and box spring. To the west is the exit.

No. 1077
[x] Obtain both set's of hunting equipment + ammunition.
No. 1078
You grab your hunting rifle and hunting knife. YOu have no goddamn clue what for, it's not like you have a hunting license or even transportation to anywhere to do so. Oh well, sometimes being nuts is fun.

No. 1080
[x] Go back to sleep.
No. 1081
You go back to sleep.
When you wake up, you find yourself in a pure white room with almost blindingly bright lighting. More noticably, you're now in a female body.

No. 1083
[X] Kill yourself
No. 1084

[X] Explore.
-[X] Your body, that is.
--[X] With your hands.
No. 1086
[X] Explore.
-[X] Your body, that is.
--[X] With your hands.
No. 1096
[X]I think they mean masturbation
No. 1118
[X] Explore.
-[X] Your body, that is.
--[X] With your hands.

it's always best to get to know yourself first before trying anything else.
No. 1181
You "explore your body with your hands."

No. 1185
[x] Explore the room.
No. 1200

Would have been better with an included 'You don't find anything unfamiliar.'
No. 1210
You explore your bedroom.
No. 1211
You explore the room. It is definitely empty. It is definitely white. And it is definitely bright.

On one wall, you find a set of cracks in the pattern of a tall rectangle with rounded corners. It appears to be something like a door, but there is no latch or hinges of any kind visible.

No. 1212
Goddamnit why won't it let me delete this
No. 1213
[x] Poke and prod at the cracks to try to open them.
[x] Challenge the cracks to yakyuken
No. 1214
[x] Run your hand against the wall.
No. 1240
You ope and prod the cracks in an attempt to open them. You also run your hand over the wall. Nothing happens.

You suddenly see a windows-like dialog box open in your vision, like an afterimage. You know ti's not just on the walls or anything since you still see it with your eyes closed. It's easier to see that way.

The message is "Welcome to the basic tutorial! Press any key to continue."

No. 1241
[X] Rumia key
No. 1242
[X]Skeleton key
No. 1243
Press Any key? What fucking keys? You don't see any keys. How does it expect you to press a key when there are none?

You mentally imagine pressing a key that says "Rumia."

The tutorial moves forward. Another dialog box comes up.

"Lesson 1: Using the HUD.
To display the HUD, simply think about it being there. The HUD contains many important information pieces, such as the current time, battery life left, local IP, hard disk usage, RAM usage, and CPU usage."

What the hell

No. 1244
Sure, why not?

[X] Think about the HUD being there.
[X] Make a note of your local IP.
No. 1245
[X] Rumia~
No. 1247
You take a minute to think about Rumia. Gee, you'd sure hate to run into here at night. Well, if you could manage to make her not eat you, that'd be great.

...Somehow you think you're forgetting something somewhere, but oh well.

Right, HUD.

You bring it up. Specifically, you look at the local IP.
Looks like a pretty normal DHCP IP from a pretty normal router, given how random that 153 is. The rest is pretty standard. There isn't much interesting other than that you, a person, apparently have a local IP.

No. 1254
[X] ルミア
No. 1258
You try the katakana for "Rumia." Nothing happens. Looks like you'll have to escape from here before pursuing her.

No. 1262
[x] hack the gibson
No. 1272
[X] Escape from here
No. 1362
Well, this was somewhat entertaining to write. However, it was only temporary, and its time is up. The threads for my old stories are restored, and I can continue with them.
However, I don't really want to write all of them at once, and people complain when I do anyway, so I'm only going to start updating one. Which one that is should be voted on in here.

[ ] VTAiG
[ ] Nightmare
No. 1364

Yes yes
No. 1370
No. 1371
No. 1387
I don't want to call this until I get at least two more votes.
No. 1388
[X] I don't know what any of those acronyms stand for. Fill me in.
No. 1389
VTAiG = Vanilla TAiG, which is basically an attempt to write a story pretty similar to WUiG. Only it went out of control and became a lot more lolrandom.

Nightmare = TAiG with Nightmare mode difficulty. Or, at least that's what it was supposed to be.

ACUTE = A Cultured Utopia Tantamant to Excellence.
No. 1390
No. 1395
ACUTE, then, I guess.
No. 1415
File 125203998482.jpg - (284.09KB , 514x800 , 1228419034755.jpg ) [iqdb]