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File 136290960663.jpg - (286.33KB, 708x501, Faintly related.jpg) [iqdb]
THis is a thread about cases of THP stories jumping the shark.

I'll start with a very infamous double case: A New World Fool, Pursuing My True Self?

The first is the attempted seduction of Koakuma in the story and its results: Stat debuffs and sparking off the story's version of EoSD

And the second? META KNIGHT. What few readers remained after the Koakuma fiasco were greeted by the first of a good number of Asspull crossover cameos. All but a 2-3 of the remaining bunch quit upon seeing that.

Between these two, it was clear the story was going south in a hurry.
It's hilarious how people got all angry when they got debuffed back then. Gee, it's like they can't live without sex scenes or something.
I believe the main issue wasn't the rejection but the surprise! Demon Lord, Massive shit happening.

Not saying the attempt wasn't stupid in the first place, but they didn't know of the surprise and the punishment was excessive.

This reminds me of a possible shark jump point in an older story: the infamous Eirin dick snap in DoLF's first run. In terms of sheer "Shark Jumping" in the same story, only the "hot-glue" scene surpasses it.
Also, don't forget "watching Bible Black with Kaguya".

Seriously, that story's MC is absolutely pathetic.
Tengu ninjas
In a way that might be the very first one as I don't think the original readers thought differently of the story after that but today it serves as a sign of how far off track anon had taken the story.
Legend of the Scarlet Devil (>>/sdm/53074) jumped the shark when it stopped abruptly at the second post after getting me interested.
Don't think that counts.
A story dying so fast isn't a shark jump as the story (and often the writer) hasn't been long enough to hit a high point.

That writefag didn't value his readers in the least. I remember some anon posting an IRC record of his BS in the story thread. That sealed the deal. The trace amount of good will that fellow had left was completely annihilated.
I remember that chat log, some pretty funny stuff, most of it due to how far up his ass his head was.
This is why you shouldn't go to the IRC. The Cabal keeps track of everything you do there.
I'm trying to remember when Average Joe went from "So bad it's good" to "So bad it's awful", I think around the time Joe slept with Tenshi and the fact he was still seeking vengence against Yukari despite his time in Gensokyo proving very beneficial (a love interest, daughter with benefits, sociopathic free reign)
I'd like more stories with MCs that try to take down Yukari.

But Average Joe was still stupid because of its blatant fanservice everywhere.
No, the reason you shouldn't go to the irc is that it's a terrible place in general.
This isn't normal? Everyone keeps logs on IRC. 4chan has a billion different easily-searchable archives. This place has an archive.
I beg to differ as such a arc/route never ends well and causes overlooking of better things. Gensokyoland Saga got better once the story went from revenge on Yukari to investigating actions of the gods/etc.
Well, whatever you say since I never read that story. I didn't like the protagonist.

>with benefits

... I really hope that there's a typo or misunderstanding here somewhere.
You must be new here.
>daughter with benefits
Tell me it's Rumia and heads will fucking roll.
Yep. THP's all about the lolis, man. That's why GH was so popular.
Tenshi. She seems to see Joe as a father of sorts and when she sees him and Yuuka having sex, well... figurative incest ensues.
Rumia is the worst touhou, bar none. But that might just be because of her fans. They've soured me on her, and I really think the only way I might come to like her is to write her.

But then I'd have to deal with the Rumia fans.
Speaking about Touhou characters being soured by their fans, that'll be just about almost every popular character for me. It's a shame, really. I want to love but all I can do is hate.

Now where's my hipster glasses?
don't let them get to you but yeah writing a character can result in growing fonder of them for sure.
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You are not alone, brother. We shall have our day. Who knows, maybe that "Cat or Fish?" writefag will return. Fat chance, I know, but maybe he'll read this post and decide to reboot. A fan can dream, yes?
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Cool, deleting my post made things more confusing for everyone.

>Cat or Fish? story
Never heard of it...
And it seems there's good reason for that. It's shit, as expected of a 2008 story.
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Yes, well, ignoring the glaring errors and such, I liked Rumia's characterization in that a lot. Still, I think Dr. Q's Rumia-centric story was leaps and bounds ahead of it. I need to go give that another read.
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I barely skimmed it. It's not like my opinion holds much weight.

Dr. Q's story was good, yeah. Pity he forgot how to write.

I want to say something about the Rumia in Imperfect Metamorphosis on fanfiction.net, but I am so tsundere for this shitty story that it keeps turning into a wall of text. Nobody wants to read that.
I've read IM before. Wasn't interested in it.

And apparently, it has godly!Yuuka in it, another thing that I don't like in Touhou stories.
Godly Yuuka? Could you clarify for me as I have a good idea but I want to make sure.
not >>16388, but IM's Yuuka is descended from being having being something much more, specifically some sort of outer god in lovecraft terms. Still, she can fight half of Gensokyo combined down to tooth and nail.
Geez. I know one other Touhou story that has Outer Gods in it and even there, they're not that OP.
Ah; I never got into that as it came off as overly dark ff.net dreck. I doubt one could figure a shark jump point for that story as with its general concept, it'd be past that point already.
What's overly dark about the concept? Lonely blob girl absorbs Touhou and tries to get people to stop hurting her. Simple. The darkest point is in chapter one, and you find out that was a fakeout like a sentence into chapter two.

The real shark jumping point is when Yuuka took over the story.
So, what's the shark jumping point for GH? Introducing Rumia as a second love interest?
That's a very complicated matter that even discussing would invoke epic shitstorms.
So, where's Taisa anyway? Still doing whatever he does in IRC?
Pretty much. Lots of complaining, while doing nothing to fix whatever he's complaining about that day.

Seems like things got really stormy after the "let them work out their differences" decision. After that, it was pretty much nonstop drama/damage control.

Personally, I started to have my doubts when Kaguya said we had to entertain her. At that point, I got the feeling that Taisa was biting off way more than he could chew.

Though, the story was still popular when it stopped, so maybe it never did jump the shark.
Until this day, I'm still baffled by anon's decision to get those two to re-conciliate, even though it's very obvious they'll never just get along that easily.

But it was hilarious though, so no complains.
To this day I question the intent of whoever proposed the idea as anon was so weary of the shitstorming that it looked very good to them.
Wasn't the one proposing that idea Taisa himself?

>[] Where do you hide the little monster?
>-{} Under the bed.
>-{} In the closet.
>-{} Let her out of the window.
>[] No, no hiding.
>-{} Just keep drawing calmly. Nobody interrupts your drawing!
>--{} Ask Flandre to join Rumia in the picture. You haven't drawn her yet, either.
>-{} Invite Flandre in and get the two to set aside their differences and make up already. You don't want your friends to resent one another.
>--{} (Optional: Write-in dialogue so the writefag doesn't pull something weak out of his ass.)

So yeah. Anon thought it was a safe choice. Even though it wasn't.

You really are a master troll, Taisa. Or was.
I miss CYOAs where the writer trolls the readers. Don't think we still have those nowadays.
There's a difference between Taisa being okay with them working out their differences, and him being okay with working out their differences RIGHT THEN, with the choices we picked.
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Pretty much this.

If it makes you feel any better, my being a huge bitch is steadily alienating anyone I'm actually friends with on the IRC one by one.
Maybe something good will happen once everyone finally gets sick of me for good and I get banned from there or something. Maybe.

Sidenote, I haven't checked THP in months and one of the first things I notice when skimming it today is GH discussion in the three most recent posts of a thread. What the fuck, people.

If I had to guess, I'd say it jumped the shark roughly around when the book was introduced.

Anyway, time to scuttle back into a hole and not do anything about my crippling first world problems. Keep on trucking, people.
You have no love for your own work, do you?

What a shame.
Also, I know this one author of a Touhou fangame. His work never got any attention yet he finished it nonetheless. And the game wasn't half-assed either.

I don't know what's wrong with you. You already have a lot of attention. People want to read more of your story. Yet for some baffling reason, you still don't want to continue your work.

I only wish you had at least a quarter of that guy's dedication.
“Just pity him, my boy. Tomorrow we'll be on our way, but he'll have to keep his own disagreeable company until the day he dies.”
>I haven't checked THP in months

This I doubt. Every time GH discussion comes around, you're there to hate yourself.
Maybe someone on the IRC told him about this thread.
Thread's over, go home, nothing to see here, folks.
You don't have to apologize.

Seriously, you should consider doing that less. A lot less. It's one of the most painful aspects of your personality. Stop being sorry and do something about that. On a related note, you shouldn'tve deleted your post anyway.
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Stop it.
>On a related note, you shouldn'tve deleted your post anyway.

To be fair, I probably shouldn't have replied to the thread in the first place. Never seems to end well.
Well then, why do you? Pretty much any time someone mentions you or your stories, you almost always end up replying, then regretting it? One of those has to go, and I'd much rather it be the regrets.
I honestly don't know. What would people prefer in general? Me just fading away into obscurity and not posting again unless it's a story update, or me trying to clumsily explain -why- I haven't been writing all this time?
I'd like to avoid pissing people off, but misinformation spreading around sucks too. I don't want people thinking I don't WANT to write, because that's simply not true.

Hey Taisa. Write something.

It will break the curse.

Seriously though, I'm interested in how your writing had or will have changed post-GH.
>I don't want people thinking I don't WANT to write, because that's simply not true.

Yes, yes it's true. You don't actually want to write.

If you do, you've written something already.
No, I really do. The fact that I can't frustrates me to no end.
What, you lost both of your hands or something?
Lack of inspiration maybe? Don't be a dick.
Oh please, everyone is justified to be a dick to Taisa nowadays.

Especially if it involves him as a writer.
I guess I may as well repost that thing I deleted. Brace for wall of bitch.


>I think the story's dumb (because I lack actual writing experience/qualifications) but I genuinely liked writing it. Interpret that as you will.
>I have never, ever stated nor implied that I don't WANT to continue my work. I honestly do. Present tense, not past tense. I still want to write both my stories and finish them up someday.
>I know my story had plenty of followers back in the day (for some reason). I also know that there are still people even today that amazingly enough haven't completely disowned me as a writer and still want me to continue it. I know it sucks to be reading a story and not getting any closure out of it when it abruptly stops.
>I still yell at glasnost about this.

>It's just... I honestly don't know how to explain it. This sensation in my skull, like being immobilized on a sticky patch of tar, or suspended in a viscous gel. Thoughts don't move like they used to.

>I still try, every now and then. Every couple of weeks, I'll open up a Word document, stare at it fruitlessly for a couple of hours while distracting myself with other things on the side to try and get the brain juices going, maybe force myself to shit out a single mediocre paragraph of THV and then close it for the day.
>And then I'll delete it the next day because rereading it makes me realize how crappy it is.

>I don't really know how or why this happened to me. As for when, actually some time before GH ground to a halt; you should be able to sense the steady decline in quality. What really showed me that I am literally unable to write anything decent anymore was that disastrous last THV update. I then figured I'd take a break until whatever this is has passed, but, well... We can see how that went.

>Next paragraph is mostly whining, feel free to ignore.

>People on the IRC say it's probably the depression crippling my brain like this. I don't know. As was mentioned in >>16421 I have a pretty bad problem with actually doing anything about my issues. Tried a tiny bit of therapy and meds and stuff, didn't stick with it. Not sure if it was helping at all or not. I should probably try again, but this mental sluggishness extends to doing things in real life as well. Easier to just sit and moan about things.

>tl;dr I wish I could write for you guys again because you're all great and I miss that sensation I used to have some years ago, back when I did two updates a day and I'd check my threads on my phone at school for replies, feeling excited on the inside about getting home and writing up the next update.
>I'm just too much of a shitlord to actually do anything to get myself back up and running, so your disdain towards me is entirely justified.

>I'll never officially declare my stories as "abandoned" because I'd like to hope one day >I'll manage to drag my sorry ass out of this slump and do things again, but...

>Anyway, sorry to the OP and others for continued tripwhoring/public self-flagellation. >I just don't want people to spread the impression that I don't WANT to write for some reason. I really do. It's just too hard for some inexplicable reason.
>Believe it or not, I'm not fishing for sympathy here.
I'm just dropping by to say that you fucking disgust me, Taisa. You're every bit as sorry of a human being as you think you are. Very likely more. There's some fuel for your little pool of pathetic self-pity. Knock yourself out.

Limp prick.

And people wonder why this site is dying.
>Believe it or not, I'm not fishing for sympathy here.
If I wanted sympathy, I'd look elsewhere. I know better than to want any from here after the shit I've pulled.
I'm just trying to clarify things. Is that so bad?

I know I'd personally like to know what's going on when a writer I've been following drops all his stuff all of a sudden, but maybe it's wrong of me to assume this is something universal. I can certainly imagine how seeing me hover around here not doing anything actually worthwhile can be irritating in its own way.
I like to know what happens when a writer drops the story. This is not odd. The thing is, Taisa, you dropped your story years ago. And explained this several times. Followed immediately by apologies and self-pity. It's really a formula at this point, invoked by any mention of GH. Call it "clarified" at this point and let it go, maybe. Or write again. Either or. Just stop getting dragged into this, because it's obviously not fun for you, and it's not fun for us to watch you attempt to drown yourself in self-pity.
You're a popstar, enjoy it.

No, really, if you want to break this cycle, just don't apologize, ever again. You did what you could and that's it, no regrets.
By any chance, are you talking about the guy who made this? That's the one thing that comes to mind, respect to him.

>I'll open up a Word document, stare at it fruitlessly for a couple of hours while distracting myself with other things on the side to try and get the brain juices going

This might be part of the problem. Trying to get your gears turning is all well and good, but the problem with distractions is that they're distractions. It's great if you can get some sort of inspiration from them, but at some point you have turn all that off and focus. Stop reading, browsing, playing, chatting, or whatever, and write.

Believe me, I know it's hard to start again after you've stopped, and the longer you've gone without doing it, the harder it is to resume. The things you do to distract yourself, though, are most likely not going to help get back into writing. If anything, they're just more obstacles to that.

>And then I'll delete it the next day because rereading it makes me realize how crappy it is.

This is also a problem. Stop doing that. I will say again, stop doing that. You know people enjoy your writing, regardless of whatever you may think of it yourself. You may not like it, but that doesn't mean they won't. You will always be your own worst critic, so you need to be aware that your feelings about your work does not necessarily reflect how others will feel about it. Let them be the ones to decide whether or not it's good enough.

Also, remember, this isn't high art we're producing here. It's fan-fiction about magical little girls in frilly dresses and funny hats. As far as the greater literary world is concerned, just about everything here is shit, so whether or you personally feel your own work is crappy is more or less irrelevant. If it's good enough for your readers, that's all that matters.
Completely agree with the first part. However, I think that, while you can be your worst critic, you are also a good way to measure the quality of your own work. If you don't like what you're writing, chances are the readers won't either. When the author is not convinced with his work, it shows, and some readers catch up with that.
>Also, remember, this isn't high art we're producing here. It's fan-fiction about magical little girls in frilly dresses and funny hats.

If only everyone on the site realized this.

What fangame exactly? But there are writers here who only get 4 votes or so on average without much discussion and they carry on any ways

I don't hold anything against Taisa as he had to endure a good deal of crap and he's a reminder of the ultimate truth of the site: If you read or write here, you have some sort of dysfunction. Well adjusted people do not read or write fanfiction about flying magical girls in frilly clothes.

But back on topic what point do you think Kahi's stories jumped the shark? I think City Quest is particularly obvious.
Yukkuri sex or amputee zombie sex, can't decide which.
Patchy quest I'm not sure on as I quit after Kahi spent a thread or two on side stories and other filler that just wasn't fun to read. It was so bad it affected my opinion of "Quest" stories.

Doll Quest on the other hand is likely something related to the fact Kahi attempted to make some sort of war game as a story.
I think ASSM jumped the shark (at least the gun) during that sequence that lead to the eye incident. Would have rather seen a bit more subtle physiological horror (paranoia, secrets) before shifting to pure survival.

Hey, that thing's still being developed?

Just some Japanese fangame that never got translated.
I'm glad that only Patchy Quest remains, and I still hope it'll die soon.

Nowadays, his quests are mostly in Spacebattles.
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I just want to say, this nigga has the righest right of it. The prime reason I was able to finish (and expand on) my latest story was because it was a story I wanted to tell. True, my faculties may have wavered here and there, but this is only natural -- I'm a human being; I'm not infallible, no matter how much I'd like to have a bitchin' cybernetic body just so I can get a qt3.14 gf, drop my pants before her and declare myself "Thunder, rain transformed," all the while lightning shoots off my... Well, let's just say I rue my human lack of infallibility sometimes.

At any rate, what I think we lack is writers who genuinely love to write and, what's more important, have stories they want to tell. A majority of the dropped stories, I wager, suffered the fate they did simply because the author had never planned on finishing them from the start. This is very apparent in some, less in others -- but in the end what the busta I quoted said was right: you can't count on the reader enjoying a story you, as the autor, personally despise. Shit just don't work that way.

Feel free to add whatever I've missed. Or disagree. I'll be over there, punching dudes. As always. Well, most of the time anyway. Maybe slightly less. Sometimes. Yeah, from time to time. Cheers.
You know, there is a "hide" button. If it bothers you that much, I suggest using it.
I already used it. But I can still see the story's name in the main page whenever it gets updated.
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>dick snapping
>Watching Bible Black with Kaguya
>daughter with benefits

I opened this thread expecting someone to mention my story.

Instead, I find out it's popular because the bar was so fucking low you'd need a ditch-witch to get under it.

Jesus Christ.
Update when?
Your story is pretty self-contained, right? Wizard readers aren't going to go to /blue/.

Lies and slander good sir.
You story may veer off track but it is not anywhere near jumping any sharks, at least compared to SWQ's dark age.

Yeah past stories when they jumped the shark, it was more like 5+ sharks all at once.

AWiY is popular because of talented writing, clever references, and a rather fresh take on things. And whatever you do mess up, it's easily fixed.

You're wrong, so wrong.
Don't right Gensokyo high.

Write another story and under a different name.

Doesn't even have to be on this site.

Gensokyo High has a massive reputation and I guess the response the two times you tried to restart it (I'm including the April Fools one) can be intimidating if you'd don't think you can write to the expected standard.

So write about something else.

When you're comfortable writing again then come back if you want to finish GH

>don't right


In more relevant news, I reread Tainted Bonds from post one tonight.

... I have this sudden foreboding feeling that I OP pic related about half a dozen times, and I have yet to realize it.

And things are only going to get crazier aaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>I have this sudden foreboding feeling that I OP pic related about half a dozen times, and I have yet to realize it.

The OP pic will only be related when you reach the other side~ Keep jumping!
Just noticed that

To be fair I was sinking piss at the time
I’ll second this. In my opinion the last 20-30% of the story was a long string of small shark jumps rather than one well-defined one, but it amounts to the same amount of disappointment. Then there was the epilogue, which was me surfing on the shark while we both jumped in tandem. I will never be able to apologize enough for train-wrecking the end of ASSM.

At least I still have AFT~

>>15792 Semi-shameful self-promotion, for your consideration!
Hey, I liked your totally grim ending of ASSM.
that doesn't exactly say much positive as even for a dark/bittersweet ending he overdid it.

Then again most shark jump related seem to have their fans who think the end result was some sort of art as opposed to the final fallout of bad writing and/or choices. Just look at those that worship the snow end when it's been said that it basically a "rocks fall, things die"/mercy kill ending as the story was so badly derailed that it couldn't be fixed.
SNOW END was hilarious and you can't argue with that.
>>16525 I liked the epilogue. It was a total shot in to the gut, with enough plausibility and substance to sidestep denial.

Besides, it had no direct relation to the troubled machinations of the finale.

Are there any ways for Anon to 'lose' and it still be a good story? It's the illusion(?) that you can "fight well and hard" and still lose, that makes those epic stories more enjoyable.
I think "THIS SHRINE" may have jumped the shark somewhere around "Red". It couldn't at the time that the protagonist was a random off-the-computer Anonymous who was also secretly an overpowered Nanaya without the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception because it hadn't had much of anything at that time. But if that plot twist had been later on in the story, it would have been a shark jump.
In any case, the cartilaginous aquatic predator was well and clearly vaulted over by the point that a surprisingly agile Yuuka had stabbed the main character in the hand and dispatched Reimu.

Which raises the question of whether a story with multiple complete runs can have jumped the shark more than once.
>Are there any ways for Anon to 'lose' and it still be a good story? It's the illusion(?) that you can "fight well and hard" and still lose, that makes those epic stories more enjoyable.

What counts as a "loss", exactly? You fail to reach your goal? Or it's more than that?
that's related to "Classic YAF" and for that it'd be better to find the first shark jump he did as after that it was nothing but other shark jumps.

you seem one of those sorts to blindly believe suffering=art.

As for your question, I doubt the current writers are of that skill level and anon wants to see stories A) finish and B) on a high note.
>you seem one of those sorts to blindly believe suffering=art.

Who said anything about art? Now you're just using ad hominem for no reason.

Do you even know what 'jumping the shark' means? It's a point where the plot has become so stupid/exaggerated, it's evidence the writers have no idea what else to do to keep the plot interesting, resorting to such ridiculous ideas. The very concept implies that once the story has crossed that line, there are no other sharks to jump over.
That exactly, yes. Nathaniel's case was decent imo: although at the core of the paranoia was a lump of sheer un-logic, the rest of it was played out interestingly and was perhaps worth the trouble to see. Characters don't have to die (the simplest and relatively dramatic narrative option) though, there are other options like. worsened relations, state of Gensokyo.

>the writers have no idea what else to do to keep the plot interesting, resorting to such ridiculous ideas

I know it sounds like "lol MACHOAnon tears and suffering". But, I think not. Authors, please don't run out and carpet bomb with these just because for various reasons downer endings are less common. The main point is: Are you kicking anon because it'll keep the plot interesting?. Or because (with some authoric license) its logical and reasonable within the context. Take a slightly different, theoretical situation with ASSM's Nat. Just say you don't trust him at all, with him literally at your throat, and so you stare him down with terse words. Conversely he feels pressured and prematurely makes his move soon after that scene. Objectively from the writer's perspective, that might have been a mistake, but he doesn't need to show it as such. Nat goes out and shit gets real (he shouldn't die unconditionally or live unconditionally without good reason), and so anon actually gets a fairly wide span of time where the heat is off of him. If anon chooses to do something during that time, it could turn out for better or worse. The only thing that's certain is that he damn sure ain't getting a dragon chiseled for him anytime soon. Or answers, for that matter. For all they know, Nat's irrationally paranoiac tendencies could have spanned much farther than they actually did, they made the right choice, and got an opening to boot.

Consequences are not just punishing the readers for failure. Not every awful deed needs a consequence. Part of it can be chalked up to luck, and another part that "not everyone who is scorned, acts on their ails, and only a portion of those can make a big difference to the player.

Oh god I hate when this happens: Author does one crazy (believably unbelievable) thing, it gets viewed as awesome, but then goes with a similar deal 2 chapters later, and faces get palmed.
>Characters don't have to die (the simplest and relatively dramatic narrative option) though, there are other options like. worsened relations, state of Gensokyo.

Yep. Please don't kill off characters unnecessarily, especially if they're characters the readers are familiar with. And when you do, do it really well that your readers will actually feel sad about it.
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>the point that a surprisingly agile Yuuka had stabbed the main character in the hand and dispatched Reimu
We should continue that some day.

Right now, with all the Metal Gear, Zone of the Enders, Hitman and REsident Evil Remake compilations, remakes are 'on'

How about a 'THIS SHRINE' HD ver?
This. I am all for a remake of that crazy shit he wrote.
I'm not.

His stories are all shit.
Why remake the old when there's new ideas to be written down?
But YAF is such a bad writer that he is good again.
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Such as?
I can only come up with a Gensokyo High but on the moon in a moon bunny academy. With lots of fluffy moon bunnies, a young Eirin and the moon twins. MC is a lost Astronaut who stranded on the moon.
>MC is a lost Astronaut who stranded on the moon.
Then and there a board of Lunarian army officers, who had suffered on the hands of humans in the previous Lunar War, sat down and chuckled right merrily. It was the first time in forty four years they had had a chance to chuckle so far as a stray human on the Moon was concerned. Their judgement was cast and vindicated even by their most patronising critics: the human would partake in a series of games engineered to apprehend his capability of adapting to the living conditions of the Moon.

The games proved to be howling successes, and the Lunarians, who used to think that only they could shoot straight, became violently enraged at the number of casualties amassed in the course of said apprehending, as well as the attention the human had received from certain overly excitable parties. Later, while some of them still were not shot through the head, they had retreated to the safety of their intricately designed subterranean panic rooms.

Early experience had been enough to keep any of them from sticking their head up during moonlight hours.
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No. It should be merrier. Lesser dark and more fluffier.

I still see some ideas that haven't been made into a story yet.
Why not? Lots of people like that particular blend of familiarity and novelty. It's one reason why many people are looking forward to the new Sailor Moon remake while passing over newer shows.
Well, I don't

I'll puke if I see yet another "a guy gets into Gensokyo" story.
Get your bucket ready.
A girl gets into Gensokyo. Better?
We had girl and we had shemale.
We need to go deeper. A story about the beginning of Gensokyo.

There was once a good story like that, which name i don't wish to mention because it still hurts.

The beginning of Gensokyo as in when the Hakurei Barrier was erected 200 years ago or something?
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Yes. This plotline is not yet fully used and can have much potential. It leaves much room and imagination for the writers too.

Just think: A story about a young Youki.
Actually, I plan on introducing him on my story in the future. Though mine is set even earlier than that.
>There was once a good story like that, which name i don't wish to mention because it still hurts.

It's Ancient Gensokyo, isn't it?

Also, for a story about that, I'd like to see a bad end where Gensokyo failed to be created. I'm quite interested in alternate history stories like that.
Mate, you know me; I couldn't write fluffy love-love stuff if my life was hanging in the balance.

"A guy's already in Gensokyo." That better?
>"A guy's already in Gensokyo." That better?
Nope. It can still be a story about romancing Touhous.
Also been done lately.
Wait. Hold on. I got this.

"A guy... never gets into Gensokyo"
Border House.
A guy is in a quantum state of being both inside and outside of Gensokyo at the same time.

Wait, we have FoM. Fuck.
Well shit. All right. Let me get this.

"A guy... never gets into Gensokyo... because Gensokyo was inside him all along!"

It's a tale of a middle-aged man with a drinking problem.
I don't want to read ZUN's biography, thank you.
You know what plotline isn't fully used and still has a lot of potential? A guy falls into Gensokyo.
And then he crashes into the ground, dying in the process.

Good end.
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Let's not start the cycle again.
Gensokyo falls... into a guy.
Isn't that what half the stories on /at/ are about?

Wait, that's falling for, not falling into. Nevermind, carry on.
How about YAF drinks himself silly and falls and dreams about a guy who falls into Gensokyo?
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Shittiest protag ever. What a smug asshole fuck. Completely unlikeable. Gary Stu piece of shit.
Gensokyo grows a penis and falls into Gensokyo.
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I don't know what the fuck are you smoking, but I want some of that.
How about gender-bended historical guy who enters gensokyo then starts making trouble and got his/her ass kicked by Reimu?

Or, you know, ask a/several drawfag/s to make FoM manga.
An unnamed THP poster falls into Gensokyo.
As in, a not-retarded Touhou enthusiast that tries to use his knowledge of games with magical little girls on them for profit, but fails miserably.

No wait, that'd pretty much like 'Another Incursion'
I guess all ideas are already taken.
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>How about gender-bended historical guy who enters gensokyo then starts making trouble and got his/her ass kicked by Reimu?
I'd read a story about Miko.
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We'd all read a story about Miko.
Many of us would be reading it just for Futo, but still.
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Between Miko and Futo, I'd take both.

So, who's writing a Miko/Futo story?
Guys Guys. Listen. How about, wait for it, a Touhou falls into the Real World!
It's been done.
I got it! Gensokyo falls...into Gensokyo! All the different Touhous meet their different personalities!
Welp i think this topic just jumped the shark
Alternate universe invasions, fuck yes. I would read the shit out of this.
I'm smoking SLDT's latest book.
...eh. There's potential, but a lot of it's the bad kind.
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The view that Yukari is someone who needs taking down is toxic and childish, born from a want to thrash out against something very powerful in some kind of show of power, or something. She's not even omnipotent, and I'll never understand those who think she is.

Thirded. ASSM was hella awesome, and AFT had weird pacing. Started it three times, and each time my interest just petered out.

FoM seemed very familiar the entire time it was being written. The constant self-questioning by the protagonist of himself, the will they-won't they drive to get closer to primary love interest Sanae, the flip-flopping between timelines/worlds, self-reflection filled train rides, the tugs at your feels that could easily be seen from miles away…

Hmmm, it's on the tip of my mind. Maybe I'll remember it later.
>She's not even omnipotent, I'll never understand those who think she is
I'll never understand people who treat fictional worlds like absolute fact.
>The view that Yukari is someone who needs taking down is toxic and childish

Eh, if people keep making stories where the Watatsukis get beaten up, surely it's not that wrong for me to ask for stories where Yukari gets beaten up.
Why is there no rage thread anymore? It was a good thread to just talk about miscellaneous THP shit.
guys, listen

what if



what if a guy



what if a guy fell into

let me finish


what if

what if a guy

fell into the REAL WORLD?
From where?

Ordinary male village from Gensokyo falls into Australian outback.

Makes his way back to Gensokyo but accidently brings back spiders with him.

Spiders absorb magic and conquer Gensokyo
Make a new one
Seconded, this has a decent degree of potential. Bonus points if it lampshades all that is stupid about fanon (AND canon)

You know, like 'MGR Revengeance' was for action games or like 'SO: The line' was for FPSs.
Thanks for reminding me. There's your thread.
>like 'SO: The line' was for FPSs.
Don't you. Fucking start. Don't. Fucking. Start.

Seriously. It's a bad idea. Don't.
there's not that many stories where that happens and most examples are either implusable or require a good deal of ass pulling or hax powers.
You had best be.
But The Line was the defining FPS game of the last 20 years! Nothing past or since has surpassed it in greatness or edginess
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Aside from that, SOTL was a mistake. The game was originally supposed to include choices and their consequences, berating you for treating it like a regular shooter (the scenario we see in the released version). Then that shit got shiv'd because of rushing publisher cunts, choices were scrapped, consequences removed, and now the game railroads you into overexposed, dragged-out, hamfisted in-your-face brutal war imagery and expects you to feel bad because "you made this happen" -- except you didn't because the intended choice system that would have made it possible (and justified if it had been included) was cut out of the game.

... And yet, somehow, it's hailed as the deepest shit since NGE and a crown example of genius storytelling which nobody even remembers today because the gameplay was utterly generic and forgettable.

Somebody explain this to me because all I see is a failed attempt at salvaging a neutered game by pretending it was supposed to be some sort of meta commentary. That's like DmC devs coming out after the game had flopped and claiming it was in fact a parody and we are all "not getting it." There's a word for that, and "a motherfucking game" isn't it.
I thought you guys were talking about Haze for a second.

How about a boy falls into Gensokyo. But all touhous are male.

Am I as creative as YAF yet because he loves that genderbender shit.
sounds like how people take things like the Snow End or ASSM's epilogue and treat them like some sort of masterpiece even over the word of the writers themselves.
There are two (three) real choices actually. The rest works just fine due to the double message, that practically all the dialog had, and the twist, which was actually well executed too. That said, hating it for what it could've been is really retarded.
The rest of your arguments don't even hold water (ham-fisted, etc) because, in the words of the retards next door, YMMV.

I can't argue, however, that the gameplay was shit (I liked it, but I have low standards) The controls worked only half the time, running to cover was a nightmare and the AI (artificial idiocy) was a joke. The multiplayer doesn't even exist. But those things are beside the point.
Yes, they are. What is the point? Well there are several of them; in fact, they forme a line. What line? In the land of the blind, the one-eyed is king
THAT is why this game is the fucking second coming.
What people? No one ever said that they were a masterpiece.
Contrast "ASSM" with "ASSM's epilogue." One term refers to a well-written story in its entirety, the other to a piece of writing that would be confusing as hell if taken alone.
Those choices don't matter.

Anyhow, I won't be addressing the rest of your points since this discussion needs to end, and I don't believe either of us would change the other's opinion anyway, but
>In the land of the blind, the one-eyed is king
There are plenty of games with actually good stories and writing. Some of them even have meaningful choices. SOTL isn't an "one-eyed" game in a land of "blind;" it's one-eyed (at best) in a land populated by the blind with nonetheless a healthy number of perfectly healthy and fully functional fellows running about.

And, frankly, considering it's a video game, having bad gameplay makes it an invalid from the get-go. The story may or may not be seen as good, but it doesn't excuse the faulty gameplay. If I wanted to experience SOTL's story, I'd read Heart of Darkness.
>"I won't be addressing the rest of your points since this discussion needs to end."
>Posts wall of text rambling about the game.

On another note, do anons prefer longer and elaborated updates that take a bit of time to be posted, or shorter but more frequent updates? Most of the first CYOAs of this site fall into the second category, but I also noticed those are the ones who are more in risk of jumping the shark or being abandoned due to writer's burn.
Shorter, but more frequent.
That's why anon should aim for the bad ends instead.
>>16635 If you have some counter-recommendations, by all means.

I don't quite follow...
The post I was referring to disappeared for some reason. It talked about how prequel Touhou CYOAs are a bad idea because of how they'll just get railroaded to the future canon Gensokyo.
So if a prequel story somehow ended in an alternate Gensokyo, it'd be alright? Like, for example, Yukari dying before she gets to build the Hakurei Barrier, thus Gensokyo wouldn't exist as we know it.
Of course. That would be interesting, wouldn't it?
>>16650 The better part of the world's youkai assembled in one place, waiting for a Border that will never be raised. Chaos ensues.
Now you've picked my curiosity. Y'know, one of my ongoing proyects is actually one of these prequel stories, and I did plan to make the plot unfold until the setting developped into The Gensokyo The Gods (and we) Loved. But now that we're discussing this, I might just drop the idea and see where Anon's choices takes the plot to. Who knows what kind of crapsack world will Gensokyo turn into?
I agree. It's always fun to see anon screwing up, and then blaming each other or the author for it.
If they do screw up (and I count on it), I'll make damn sure Anon realizes it was their fault only. If they want to kill a Touhou for good, there'll be consequences. Moreso if that Touhou was a critical character involved with the creation of Gensokyo in the future.
Canon Gensokyo doesn't even have to be the natural or even possible outcome ie. anon screwing isn't the only way to lead to AU Gensokyo.

Don't "tragic end" the reader "just because". Then you get no few amount of devastated readers, who feel like they have no other way of justifying that fact that they were devastated, other than the story or ending was special. Then other people complain because the story wasn't actually particularly special (even that it trained-wrecked) other than that it was tragic, and then people get more cynical of dark stories. Then Yukari falls off my slippery slope.
I see. So you're saying that the writer should state right from the very beginning that there's no chance at all that the story will end up with the usual canon Gensokyo, to prevent future disappointments from anon, am I right?
That's the tricky part, isn't it? As the writefag, you must "punish" the readers when they vote a choice that leads to a trainwreck, and when they take too many wrong turns, you must let the wreck happen. On the other hand, you also need to let the readers know there's always the possibility of earning a good ending... but since we're talking about prequel stories, even the slightliest mistake can change the future wildly, depending on who's affected by Anon's choice.
As if anyone plans out their endings before starting a story nowadays.

Oh Please, I've been working on a story of my own and the biggest problem is filling in the space between the intro and the end.

THIS. I know how to start a story, I know what end the story has, but I'm not sure how to fill the gap between them. Am I have given enough plot points to advance the story? Was the story too short/long? Did the characters fleshed out enough to make the audience care for him/her?

Maybe that's why so many story got abandoned;
The writers start the story with confidence because some story ideas spark in their brain, but then, they don't know how to construct their story to the end. Combined with some other factors like lack of readers or some real life problems, then they decided to bail out and abandon their story.

Looking at a dead story feels like looking at an abandoned construction projects: You can see the half-finished building, full of potential, how it'll be looks like... But to know that it'll never be finished was kind of sad, even though you're not the one who built it.
>As the writefag, you must "punish" the readers when they vote a choice that leads to a trainwreck, and when they take too many wrong turns, you must let the wreck happen.

I'm sorry, but something about this notion just seems wrong to me. As the writer, you have the final word on what choices are made, and what their outcomes will be. More than that, you are usually the one who decides what the choices even are to begin with. Unless you're dealing with a write-in, any choice the readers make is one that you gave them. If any choice they make leads to disaster, it's only because you are the one who decided to make it play out that way.

Why, exactly, should your readers be punished for making choices that you allowed them to make? Sure, their decisions should have consequences, for better or worse, but there is a difference between saying "this single bad thing in the story happened because of something you did" and "the whole story has become an irreversible clusterfuck and it is entirely your fault".

It makes no difference what kind of story you're writing, if you "let the wreck happen" you're doing something wrong. You're not "letting" anything happen, you're making it happen and trying to pass the blame along to your readers, and that sort of thing never goes over well.
Since we were discussing about letting Anon's choices drive the plot forward as opposed to writefag railroading, I assumed we were implying write-ins only. If the author himself is the one that puts choices leading to bad ends, that's just Typemoon logic at work - unless the options are obviously wrong from a mile away, and Anon isn't suppossed to pick them if they want the plot to continue.
it depends on the story but even the faster ones can't keep up forever. I've seen many fast writers, most of which wound up burning out.

I'd rather have CONSISTANT update speed. People who say they want fast updates don't have lives and don't consider the long term prospects of high speed update rates.

Correct, it's one thing to have some fallout from a bad choice it's another to royally screw them over permanently for it. If Anon gets the idea that you're out to fuck them over, they will not react well. Most major fiascoes in the past were caused by poor understanding between reader and writer.

As far as why there's bad end choices? VN traditions and the hopes that Anon's smart enough to notice the traps. Too bad a good chunk are not and another chunk ENJOYS causing them.

Though these days some writers are moving away from bad ends because it's ultimately a waste of an update and there's a stigma attached to them due to the notion of "too many bad ends = writer quitting"
Even if you're talking about write-ins, don't you, as the writer, still have the final word on how it plays out? Or, for that matter, on whether or not you even use it? If every single reader is voting in favor of some write-in that you cannot actually write without it horribly derailing your story, you could just not write it. Even when dealing with stories where going along with what the readers want is the entire point, the writer always has the option of saying "no". Some people might not be happy about it, but nobody will be happy if the story they're enjoying turns into Snow End 2.0 and the only thing the guy who wrote it has to say for himself is "well, YOU guys are the ones who made all those bad choices!"
>Why, exactly, should your readers be punished for making choices that you allowed them to make? Sure, their decisions should have consequences, for better or worse, but there is a difference between saying "this single bad thing in the story happened because of something you did" and "the whole story has become an irreversible clusterfuck and it is entirely your fault".

What is this "irreversible clusterfuck" you're talking about anyway? A derailed story? Then I agree, it's bad. A story where a lot of bad things happen? Then it's not necessarily bad.

You're giving me the impression that every single CYOA out there must end happily ever after or something. You know that's what anon wants.

>People who say they want fast updates don't have lives and don't consider the long term prospects of high speed update rates.

Bullshit. I know a writer in FF.net that likes to update once in 2-3 days. And he's been doing it for 6 months already.

I really don't like updating speed less than once a week. I'll usually already forget about the previous update by that point, and I don't like re-reading things all over again.

The bad thing about SNOW END wasn't the bad end itself, where everything got destroyed in the end. It was how it didn't explain anything.

Or were anon just angry that they didn't get to live happily ever after with their waifu Reisen?

And honestly, I find the notion of a writer that is out to get you interesting. Makes every vote count. If you know the writer is a nice guy who won't screw you over, why bother seriously thinking and voting for the story? It's going to end nicely either way.
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>You're giving me the impression that every single CYOA out there must end happily ever after or something. You know that's what anon wants.

That is not what I am suggesting in the least. If your story is going for drama and tragedy, then bad things happening is par for the course. That doesn't mean, though, you should be using that as a means to punish your readers, least of all for making "wrong" choices.

Yes, most people would probably prefer to have happy endings. Of course, you are by no means obligated to give your audience everything they want, and if an unhappy ending is all they can look forward to, then so be it. But if you make a point of "punishing" them for the choices they make, that might lead them to not wanting to make choices at all.

>The bad thing about SNOW END wasn't the bad end itself, where everything got destroyed in the end. It was how it didn't explain anything.

That is exactly my point, though. The reason nothing was explained was attributed to the readers not picking the choices that would have supposedly led to things being explained. "You made the wrong choices so you don't get to know why all these bad things that are also your fault are happening".

Not a good note to end a story on.
>having a life.
>Quality writing

Choose 1.

If that's truly an exception then how come virtually all fast stories end up slowing down or just dying?

That and if story that goes too fast, it ends up alienating readers. If someone misses out on 2+ choices each day due to having to work or go to school, you think they'll read it still?
There is a sweet spot for speed, and I think I've found it. I try to update at least twice a week, occasionally three times. I've only missed one week of updates in about nine months of writing, and that was because Christmas and car accident.
>>and if an unhappy ending is all they can look forward to, then so be it.
I disagree. Why read a story if everything's going to be fucked in the end anyway?
>If that's truly an exception then how come virtually all fast stories end up slowing down or just dying?

Because the writer is just not dedicated enough. It really has nothing to do with the speed of the update.

>That and if story that goes too fast, it ends up alienating readers. If someone misses out on 2+ choices each day due to having to work or go to school, you think they'll read it still?

I never asked for three updates per day. That's just unreasonable. Once a day is the ideal.
Because there are those who love to watch suffering?
>I disagree. Why read a story if everything's going to be fucked in the end anyway?

Because, regardless of how it ends, it could still be an interesting story? In fact, depending on the story being told, sometimes there can be no ending but an unhappy one.
I've seen too many otherwise interesting stories get fucked over by unhappy endings to agree with that.
What stories?
Oh, I don't remember. I just know it's happened.
I sound so fucking credible, don't I?
Yep, sure you are.
Exactly. And stories would have to end for that to actually be a thing. Stories don't end here. Ever.

What. No, I meant stories in general, not just here. Movies and books and stuff.
Bad ends work even less here, though.
Oh. Well, I'd have to say that happy endings fuck stories just as much, if not more, than unhappy stories. Mostly because most of them are complete ass-pulls or Deus Ex Machina sort of shit.
As long as the ending provides a logical closure to the plot, I do not care if it's bad or good or whatever. But as >>16681 says, most stories here don't even get that, sadly.
Fuck endings. Leave everything open-ended forever.
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Closure is for queers. I'd rather smoke Mokou.
Snow End.
Does that count as jumping the shark?

Off-topic, one day I'll explode and write Protoman in Gensokyo.
It read that as Potatoman.
That might work as well.
The Great War had ended. One year after, the damage from four years of war takes its toll on hidden magical Europe and rifts in the barriers between our world and the havens begin.
Most are minuscole and are unnoticed, but here and there across the continents, incidents would begin to occur.

A young man disappears near a holly tree by a bended brook at a festival in Ireland. Records show the presence of unidentifiable energies in the area. Investigators soon arrived. The only note worthy discovery was the existence of strange powder, upon closer inspection, revealed to be fine scales, shaped for flight.

Rifts occur within Norway within the deep forests. Strange items are left behind discovered by adventurers, Real Manly Men, and paid "archeologists", a large number being what are assumed to be ceremonial weapons and armor. Two swords of particular note were bought by the Smithsonian Institution. They are recorded to give off an unknown energy, especially when wielded by fraternal twins of the opposite gender.
Frued has a field day.
Rifts drift further south, appearing in France, Germany, Italy and Greece

A rift opens near Mount Olympus. A single equine automon falls out, crashes into the ground and is rendered broken.
It is recovered by German Scientists. Internal reports state the horse is composed of an unknown bronze alloy, treated to contain massive amounts of energy and systems for self repair (protocol assumed to be disabled from impact). Furthermore, its mechanics and engines rely on antique machinery. German metallurgists estimate the bronze to be ancient, yet the automon had not yet rusted. The internal systems were powered by a core engine of unknown design. Efforts were soon underway to reverse engineer the automon.

Rift activity begins to decrease. There are few major incidents. The existence of the rifts is hidden from public, known only by the heads of governments.

The Third Reich begins

Hitler, intrigued by the unknown energies expands research and procurement of all artifacts related to the rifts.
German scientists stumble upon, once again in Norway, a cube of mysterious origin, created out of an unknown metal.
It is deemed to be a power source, named the Tesseract.
Nazi Germany, and humanity, begins its forays into Magic.

Albert Einstein escapes to the United States, bringing with him a complete record of all German research into Magic.
The Sewer Project begins beneath the fledgling Manhattan project.
Scientists complain of crocodiles in New Mexico.
The Rifts stop appearing. New artifacts cease to appear.

Nazi Magitech has advanced considerably. Various weapon systems are in development, few ready for prototype testing. Of significance, there is development of the first powered armor and magic missiles. A different project finds it is possible to change the mass of a object by running a specific range of magical energy through electrical currents. No prototype is finished and Nazi Germany is unable to complete any weapons capable of turning the Eastern front in Russia. Most prototypes are mothballed due to impracticability, cost, or usage limitations.
There is development of laser weapons system.

A group of American Spec Ops conducts a raid on Nazi research centers using data stolen from an assault on Greenland.
A certain captain manages to steal the Tesseract.

Allied magical research pays off in the bombing of Nagasaki and Hiroshima with a combination magic and atomic bomb.
The Fatman's 21kt yield is increased to nearly 33kt. Magic is fully embraced as a weapon of destruction.
It is still hidden from public knowledge.
WW2 ends.
American and Soviet researchers take the lead in magical and atomic research.

Research into laser weaponry ends once scientists realize that beams of piercing light that cauterize wounds are retarded as anti-personal weapons. Sir Issac Newton once again proved the deadliest son-of-a-bitch on the battlefield.

NASA detonates a magical nuke at Bikini Atoll. The resulting magic is redirected towards the moon. The methodology and tools used remain unknown, as is most magic. The official report states the reason for the test as, "Testing the Effect of Magical Radiation in the Atmosphere and Near Earth Space." The Suspicious black ink before is analyzed to find the phrase, "For Shits and Giggles"
The blast tears through the atmosphere creating an EMP effect that knocks out all satellites in its path. It impacts the Lunar Surface near Posidonious J, the darker soil of the crater turned a pale white from the magical radiation.
Of importance is a large anomaly along Serenitatis discovered during the impact. Working telescopes in Hawaii record a shimmer as the magical energy washed over the anomaly's location. The effect is similar to the prototype invisibility cloaks under development in England beneath Alnwick Castle. Further study convinces NASA and the government of giving the anomaly serious study.
The Red telephone rings in the White House.
Soviet leadership asks, "What the hell are you Americans doing to the moon, how the hell did you maniacs direct a magical nuke, and what the balls is that shimmering thing?"
Eisenhower replies, "It's magic. I ain't gotta explain shit"

Space Race begins.

Sputnik. NASA shits its bricks.

NASA starts considering a manned Lunar Mission. Plans begin for the Mercury project.
Funding is shifted into development of magical tools to supplement Lunar exploration.
NASA creates the first hyper kinetic magical weapon.
It is deemed to costly for any sort of mass production.
Only two are ever produced.
Work begins on converting Nazi magi tech power armor into functional power space suits.
Progress is made; cake is to be had.

Apollo project begins. Soviets beat Americans and Project Mercury to space. NASA shits its bricks again.

The only two magic-kinetic weapons are repurposed into Lunar drilling tools.

July 16th, 1969, 13:32:00 UTC:
Apollo 11 launches from Launch pad LC 39A at Cape Canaveral.
The first manned lunar mission is underway

July 16th, 1969, 15:48:00 UTC:
A magical EMP is set off in low-earth orbit from the second stage of the Saturn V rocket.
It is attributed to unexpired magical fuel cells exploding from malfunction.
A large number of Soviet, British, and American observational satellites are taken out of commission.

July 20th, 1969, 20:17:40 UTC:
The Eagle has landed. Two American astronauts become the first humans on an extraterrestrial body.

July 20th, 1969, 20:17:41 UTC
The First Lunar Invasion begins.
Beautiful. I'm taking this. For things.
I expected a Metal Gear Solid-esque conspiration somewhere along those lines, but this is also excellent. I tip my hat to you, talented Anonymous.
The American flag planted in the Sea of Serenity was in fact, a trojan horse. 6 inches below the cloth, the flagstaff split.
The flagstaff was a sheath for the HF long sword inside, crafted using an ancient sword dropped out of rift and into a lake in Wales. The flag itself was attached to the pommel. The 4.5 ft blade was fitted with magic rocket boosters and a tether allowing for stabbing of enemy combatants from upwards of 20m. Neil Armstrong carried this flag during the Lunar Invasion. It was hot.

The drilling tools shaved particles off a block of Uranium 238. The particles were then passed through a zero mass field created by running a negative electrical current through solidified dark magic and accelerated to hypersonic (1.47e6 m/s at sea level) speeds. By firing a stream of these particles, the lunar surface could be drilled for rock samples by simply blowing it to bits. The lunar invasion proved this to be an excellent anti-infantry weapon.

The Command/Service Module was modified from its original design, refitted to be 25ft taller. The extra weight was compensated for by the magical fuel cells and boosters within the second and first stages of the Saturn V. It housed a nose mounted prototype XAU-2 Avenger Cannon and a M102 Howitzer. Both used the same uranium ammunition as the drill tools. The multi-directional boosters allowed the CSM to orient its self for any firing solution from orbit.

All prototype weapons were mothballed after the Apollo program due to cost.
It cost 400,000 dollars to fire the Avenger... For 12 seconds

The Lunar Module was a Metal Gear.
>No clones
>No nanomachines
>No lolinstantdeath virus
3/10 would not read again
Hey, I'm not turning this into a short.
I'm not a writer.
Take up the cause Anon and make up stuff. The Story of how Neil Armstrong Won Against the Moonbitches.
And Seduced the Moonhoneys.
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I'm sorry, but am I the only one who thinks this sounds stupid? I mean, I appreciate the attempt at finding a less derogatory way to refer to the Watatsukis and all, but surely you can do better than "Moonhoneys".

Like Moonpookies. What about Moonpookies? Sure, it might not be any less stupid, but it's sure as hell a lot more fun to say. Go on, try it. I dare you.
How about Moonsisters?
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So it will be something like Rance but with touhou?
Rance heads to JAPAN to fuck Kouhime, but gets lost and winds up in Gensokyo.

Or gets really lost and winds up on the moon, then fucks the Moonbitches and conquers everything.
Moonpookies has too many plosives. Moonhoneys is smoooooth, like the Moonhoneys themselves. Pay no attention to the pockmarked face of the moon.
This is reverse reverse psychology to get me to write, isn't it.
I already tried Sengoku Gensokyo with a battle system largely inspired from Rance. Didn't really work out.
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>liking the utter tripe that KW/PM churned out

>mon visage quand

It's all pretentious trash designed to feed his fetish for green-eyed blondes.
did you just imply PM and KW were the same person?
Not this shit again, THP. I thought we were behind these things.

Isn't it obvious? Their writing styles are practically identical right down to digressing every few paragraphs to wax poetic about how -beautiful~- whichever girl is getting screen time is.
Who are PM and KW?
Well I guess KW because PM is Peerless Magician.
Peerless Magician, obvious.

KW is Kamikaze Wraith, author of The Idea of Alice in /sdm/.
>digressing every few paragraphs to wax poetic about how -beautiful~- whichever girl is getting screen time is.

Perfect THP right there.
That was the one with the WW2 backstory or something, right? Earned it an immediate drop from me.
a couple of stories had that for Alice before she wound up in Makai though KW's was particularly grim and dark even for that.
You guys drop at the smallest things.

So was this the point where that story jumped the shark?
Not really, just a matter of opinion. With that story there is no clear moment where it jumped the shark if any as it stopped suddenly.
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